Comments on: Do you guys have JOBS?!

Do you guys have JOBS?!

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 16:49:46 -0800

this isn't going real well ... no, sir, not at all

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 16:51:49 -0800

look, i don't even know where to start ... it's not that great a question, it wasn't posed real well and people are getting kind of ornery ...

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 16:55:18 -0800

Did you try flagging?

By: thirteenkiller

thirteenkiller — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 16:56:04 -0800

By: Mr. Gunn

Mr. Gunn — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 16:57:11 -0800

I flagged, and bunches of other people flagged, and it just keeps growing. I think that's AskMe lingo for thread free-for-all. We've already got the first animated gif.

By: loquacious

loquacious — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 16:59:02 -0800

Get a job.

By: paulsc

paulsc — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 16:59:04 -0800

I dunno about the not-going-well thing, pyramid termite. This may be the greatest troll in the history of the Green. I'm kinda tempted to cyber applause, myself.

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 16:59:37 -0800

"Man, you gotta be pretty desperate to make it with a robot!"
[Marge whispers in ear]
"I knew that."

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:01:00 -0800

Did you try flagging?

the question by itself is borderline ... but the bickering's getting out of hand

This may be the greatest troll in the history of the Green.

i'm wondering about that myself ...

By: brownpau

brownpau — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:03:15 -0800

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:03:27 -0800

I was partly kidding, pt. Odds are that the thread's been flagged as all get out, just mom and dad are out for the afternoon.

/Cranks Bob Seger, slides down hallway in Raybans and tighty-whities

By: Smart Dalek

Smart Dalek — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:05:15 -0800

The reason Matt and Jess haven't deleted the thread is because they actually work for a living, which means they don't have all day to-

-GREAT SCOTT! "JMARQ" IS ACTUALLY A SOCKPUPPET FOR BOTH OF THE ADMINS!

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:07:01 -0800

I thought MetaFilter was Matt's fucking job?

By: maryh

maryh — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:11:50 -0800

pssst Alvy... Matt's over at Fark

By: scrump

scrump — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:13:27 -0800

I just want to say that those of us who really work on ambulances shouldn't be tarred with the same brush as this jackass.

(I'm posting from the inside of a patient's ribcage right now)

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:14:47 -0800

(I'm posting from the inside of a patient's ribcage right now)

move down a little and you can vent some spleen

By: cortex

cortex — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:20:08 -0800

Outside of a ribcage, it's too dark to read!

By: cortex

cortex — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:20:20 -0800

I don't think I told that right.

By: scrump

scrump — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:24:00 -0800

Of course you didn't. You're a brain. Everyone knows the old joke about the most important part of the body, and YOU'RE NOT IT.

By: Smart Dalek

Smart Dalek — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:28:22 -0800

Alright, leave it out and put in a windshield-wiper instead.

By: languagehat

languagehat — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:30:42 -0800

Thank you for posting this callout. I was very tempted to call the AskMe poster an idiot in the AskMe thread, which would have been wrong. Now I can do it here, in the finest tradition of MetaTalk.

Also, this is the funniest thing I've seen all day. Thanks, thirteenkiller!

By: dersins

dersins — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:35:37 -0800

It must be national admins take a day off day or something, because this piece of shit is still open, as well.

So, uh, fire up your self-linking, double-posting engines, folks. The time is ripe to take the blue by storm...

By: loquacious

loquacious — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:41:30 -0800

*Opens Matt's webcam stream*

Augh damn! Put some pants on!

He's, uh, busy.

By: stavrosthewonderchicken

stavrosthewonderchicken — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:51:57 -0800

Welcome, new users! Even the morons!

It must be national admins take a day off day or something

Undeleted double here, too, from yesterday. And yeah, I flagged it.

By: naxosaxur

naxosaxur — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 17:53:47 -0800

I can't wait until everyone on metafilter sees me and my raffish, freewheeling, devil-may-care attitude.

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 18:03:21 -0800

This post was deleted for the following reason: try a blog for your rants instead?

works for me ... thank you, metagods

By: Effigy2000

Effigy2000 — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 18:12:25 -0800

By: mathowie

mathowie — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 18:16:04 -0800

Sorry about that. I flew down to California for my mom's surprise party and have been offline for much of the past 24hrs.

By: Mr. Gunn

Mr. Gunn — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 18:18:10 -0800

Just in time, too. Because you know what time it almost was...

By: naxosaxur

naxosaxur — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 18:18:30 -0800

my favorite part was when he was all like *backpedaling* ha ha just an observation guys no need to get defensive now...trust me: you'll know when i'm being a dick *backpedaling*

By: dersins

dersins — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 18:26:47 -0800

Umm, Matt, if you don't do something about this thread, too, you're going to get about 50 "WHAAA!!!! MY CHATFILTER WAS DELECTED WHY WAS IT DELETED WHEN THE TRANSPORTER / HOLODECK / REPLICATOR POST GOT TO STAY!!!" metatalk posts in the next month or so....

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 18:37:32 -0800

That is absurd.

Transporter all the way, dumbasses.

By: ND¢

ND¢ — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 18:49:08 -0800

got to hell.

By: Divine_Wino

Divine_Wino — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 18:52:08 -0800

Which one of those three devices allows one to split Star Trek folks from asshole to appetite and hang them from the city walls as a lesson to the others?

By: Mitheral

Mitheral — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:02:02 -0800

paulsc writes "This may be the greatest troll in the history of the Green"

Not even close to the "I got my blind girlfriend's sister pregnant" question.

By: goodnewsfortheinsane

goodnewsfortheinsane — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:07:51 -0800

Not even close to the "I got my blind girlfriend's sister pregnant" question.

Really? I thought it was pretty generic.

By: jessamyn

jessamyn — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:08:49 -0800

I thought it was pretty generic.

bump. set. SPIKE.

By: blue_beetle

blue_beetle — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:16:41 -0800

I miss hypotheticals, without a doubt my favorite posts have talked about:

Training to fight bears

Fighting 5 year olds

Disposing of corpses

Does that make me a bad person?

By: goodnewsfortheinsane

goodnewsfortheinsane — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:20:03 -0800

That all depends. Did you want to dispose of the bear corpses, or the five year-olds' corpses?

By: ROU_Xenophobe

ROU_Xenophobe — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:20:13 -0800

Which one of those three devices allows one to split Star Trek folks from asshole to appetite and hang them from the city walls as a lesson to the others?

I know. I mean, transporter / holodeck / food replicator? What is that shit?

Everyone knows the proper choice is between farcaster, immersive VR via neural lace or effector, and wendymeat.

By: ROU_Xenophobe

ROU_Xenophobe — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:23:11 -0800

That all depends. Did you want to dispose of the bear corpses, or the five year-olds' corpses?

THINK, people!

[SINGING]
Feed the children, with no shoes on their feet, to the bears, who don't have enough to eat. Take bear corpses, and put 'em in the peat. Oh, oh, there's a solution.
[/SINGING]

I miss questions like those too. Don't forget about removing your own tonsils.

By: fire&wings

fire&wings — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:32:26 -0800

That guy was a prick. I'm getting shagged up the arse right now and I can still type okay.

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:36:59 -0800

Did you want to dispose of the bear corpses, or the five year-olds' corpses?

a holodeck wouldn't work for that and a replicator is right out, for obvious reasons

therefore, the answer is transporter

two questions

do transporters accept mailing addresses?

i know the number, the street and the city, but what's the zip code for the white house?

(hmm, maybe that replicator could be useful, after all)

By: Gamblor

Gamblor — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 19:48:09 -0800

I'm getting shagged up the arse right now and I can still type okay.

Worst. Buttsecks. Evar.

By: Mitheral

Mitheral — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:08:50 -0800

blue_beetle writes "I miss hypotheticals, without a doubt my favorite posts have talked about:
"
Disposing of corpses
"

What makes you think that was a hypothetical?

By: Smart Dalek

Smart Dalek — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:14:52 -0800

Let's get this over with once and for all, shall we?

REGARDLESS OF WHAT THE WRITERS AND PRODUCERS OF TREK HAVE THROWN ONSCREEN OVER THE YEARS, A TELEPORTATION UNIT WOULD POSSESS THE SAME INHERENT QUALATIES OF A MATTER REPLICATION UNIT AND A PROJECTION SYSTEM. BY EXTRAPOLATING THE "DATA" OF AN ITEM AT ONE END OF THE TELEPORTER, THE ITEM COULD BE SENT TO ANOTHER DESTINATION, OR THE "DATA" COULD SERVE AS A TEMPLATE; CHEMICAL COMPOUNDS AND RAW ELEMENTS IN MEASURED AMOUNTS COULD BE FED AT ONE OF THE SECONDARY POINTS AND YOU WOULD EFFECTIVE HAVE A FOOD PROCESSOR/REPLICATION UNIT. ADJUSTING THE SETTINGS COULD ALSO PRODUCE A DISPLAY REGISTRY ROUGHLY SIMILAR TO A HOLOGRAPHIC PROJECTION SYSTEM. AND SURE - WITH EVEN MORE TWEAKING, YOU COULD DESIGN THE TELEPORTER TO DEMATERIALISE MATERIAL INTO ITS CORE CONSTITUENTS WITHOUT REASSEMBLING THEM, THEN MOUNT THE EQUIPMENT ON THE EXTERIOR OF A SPACESHIP AND PRESTO! YOU'D MORE OR LESS HAVE YOURSELF A FUNCTIONING DISINTEGRATOR CANNON. WORK IN SOME KIND OF "CONTAINMENT FIELD" POPULAR IN SCI-FI TROPES, AND YES, YOU'D HAVE "SOLID" (OR SO-CALLED "HARD LIGHT") HOLOGRAMS.

GIVEN THAT MUCH OF THIS TECH IS STILL IN THE RANGE OF IMPROBABILITY/IMPRACTICALITY, ARGUING OVER THE COOLNESS FACTOR OF IT ALL IS LIKE...WELL, GETTING ALL MISTY-EYED OVER A NETOWRK TELEVISION SERIES, A SATURDAY MORNING CARTOON, OR A STRING OF THEATRICAL MATINEES - OH, WAIT, RIGHT. HOW SILLY OF ME...

YOU KIDS TODAY NEED TO READ MORE BOOKS. AND NOT JUST THE COFFEE TABLE ONES, EITHER.

By: Smart Dalek

Smart Dalek — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:15:28 -0800

Damn you, pyramid termite!

By: arto

arto — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:30:01 -0800

Okay, then, if you could have any ONE of these three technologies from "Clan of the Cave Bear", would it be the "ROCK", the "BIG STICK" or "FIRE?"

By: yhbc

yhbc — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:38:09 -0800

What, no monolith option?

By: UbuRoivas

UbuRoivas — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:38:26 -0800

I know this has probably been discussed & answered a thousand times before, but I am too lazy to search, so in the spirit of AskMe:

Can anybody give me a nutshell reason why we don't have a dedicated ChatFilter / HypotheticalFilter area? Those kinds of questions are against the spirit of AskMe, but many of us do seem to get a lot of enjoyment out of them.

(And don't just point me to MetaChat, please)

By: Smart Dalek

Smart Dalek — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:39:19 -0800

Maybe we should have a race between the trucks from The Beverly Hillbillies and Sanford & Son, to decide the ultimate fate of humanity.

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:42:02 -0800

how have FIRE without STICK? ... arto not caveman ... arto neanderthal dummy ... arto go extinct

By: c13

c13 — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:46:36 -0800

Yeah, if only we all could be fucking auto mechanics. Because that's what "working on the ambulance" means in English. He surely can't be an EMT, can he?

By: SpecialK

SpecialK — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:46:43 -0800

UbuRoivas: Why not, when that IS what MetaChat is there for?

By: blue_beetle

blue_beetle — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:00:18 -0800

Why must this always be explained, and often in all caps?

THE TRANSPORTER IS NOT A FAX MACHINE. IT CONVERTS SOLID MATTER INTO A MATTER STREAM THAT IS REASSEMBLED AT THE DESTINATION. IT IS NOT A COPY. IT IS THE ORIGINAL ITEM. THINK OF IT MORE LIKE A LOCALIZED WARP DRIVE. CAN I STOP SHOUTING NOW BECAUSE I'M TIRED OF HOLDING DOWN THE SHIFT KEY. I KNOW THAT TECHNICALLY I COULD JUST PRESS CAPS LOCK BUT THE SIMPLEST SOLUTION IS NOT ALWAYS THE BEST. IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME, DO SOME READING ABOUT AMERICAN POLITICS. THAT IS ALL. END RANT.

By: blue_beetle

blue_beetle — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:02:38 -0800

Also: MetaChat is not a part of Metafilter. That's like saying, if you want to talk about news items, go to GoogleGroups, or some random website. (attach snark here)

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:15:58 -0800

THE TRANSPORTER IS NOT A FAX MACHINE.

it's a good thing, too ... saboteurs could paint themselves black and send themselves through, and then the other transporter would be out of ink quicker

By: delmoi

delmoi — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:22:45 -0800

Does matt may Jessamyn? If not, why not?

By: delmoi

delmoi — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:23:38 -0800

THE TRANSPORTER IS NOT A FAX MACHINE. IT CONVERTS SOLID MATTER INTO A MATTER STREAM THAT IS REASSEMBLED AT THE DESTINATION. IT IS NOT A COPY. IT IS THE ORIGINAL ITEM. THINK OF IT MORE LIKE A LOCALIZED WARP DRIVE.

Well, what about the eppisode where Riker got duplicated, huh?

By: evilcolonel

evilcolonel — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:30:55 -0800

hey, that sounds neat! how do you do that and do you orgasm just as nicely as you do when masturbating in the subway?

Calling Mr. Monday... Mr. Carl Monday...

By: jessamyn

jessamyn — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:37:51 -0800

Does matt may Jessamyn? If not, why not?

Can you make some sense, please?

UbuRoivas, there is a short answer and a long answer. The short answer is "because the site, as it currently exists, can't handle an endless stream of hypothetical/chatfilter questions and such questions aren't really useful to the community as a whole (in the future) just to the person answering the question at the time." the longer answer is "and yes mathowie could change that, but he doesn't want to, and I'm not really keen on the idea either".

By: loquacious

loquacious — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:40:33 -0800

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:46:07 -0800

The short answer is "because the site, as it currently exists, can't handle an endless stream of hypothetical/chatfilter questions and such questions aren't really useful to the community as a whole (in the future) just to the person answering the question at the time." the longer answer is "and yes mathowie could change that, but he doesn't want to, and I'm not really keen on the idea either".

why is the short answer longer than the long answer? ... i'm so confused ...

By: scarabic

scarabic — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:52:37 -0800

I no longer post here much during work hours because my job is really all I can handle between 9 and 5. At times I may take a 10 minute MeFi break but usually I post right after waking, over morning cofee, or in the late evening hours.

Just as relevant a question, but more revealing of the underlying assholishness, would have been:

"How do people without kids find the time to post here?"

naxos nailed him as only she can.

By: achmorrison

achmorrison — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:53:46 -0800

It seems interesting to me that AskMe is supposed to exist as a resource ("for the future") but the average lifetime (people actively participating in discussion of question) of a thread is shrinking to less than a day. In fact, some askers won't even follow up on their own question after a few hours have past.

Which makes me think (again) that some people don't get the internet...

By: scarabic

scarabic — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:54:39 -0800

"How do people without kids find the time to post here?"

Not only is this negative when I meant it to be positive, it's framed totally wrong. Jesus. What's wrong with me tonight?

I mean something more like:

"There must be nobody on this site with any kids from the way you all post so much."

I know this to be untrue but it's no less an apparently valid assumption than that we must all be jobless.

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 21:59:24 -0800

There must be nobody on this site with any kids from the way you all post so much.

that's because they spend so much time on here, they never get to MAKE any kids

*cymbal crash*

By: jonson

jonson — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:12:31 -0800

I have a kid & a job & I still come here a lot. Plus my volunteer time with the orphans. Not to mention the weekends spent building homes for Habitat for Humanity. And don't get me started on washing the lepers. Jesus but those lepers are hard to clean! The point is, I'm a busier, better person than all of you put together times five.

Wait. What were we discussing again?

By: cortex

cortex — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:13:35 -0800

how much better we like y2karl than you

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:15:09 -0800

I smell shenanigans.

Everyone knows cleaning out the drain is the hardest part of bathing lepers.

By: loquacious

loquacious — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:18:05 -0800

I smell shenanigans.

Everyone knows cleaning out the drain is the hardest part of bathing lepers.

I always thought the hardest part was not throwing up.

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:20:11 -0800

n00b.

By: allen.spaulding

allen.spaulding — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:20:52 -0800

I didn't have the time to read this, could someone summarize it in a photo that involves an animal pooping?

By: loquacious

loquacious — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:22:08 -0800

ph00l.

Everyone knows lepers are for greasing the stones with.

By: davy

davy — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:28:31 -0800

Still, how much work can somebody get done if you're so busy metafiltering at work?

By: davy

davy — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:34:08 -0800

OOH Scarabic brought up Naxosaxur! OOH if you disagree with Naxosaxur she calls you a retard, a Nazi and probably a pedophile too. I'm so AFRAID of that one's sparkling wit, and all her classmates in 7th grade.

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:35:55 -0800

Well, this took yet another wacky turn.

By: delmoi

delmoi — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:54:08 -0800

Does matt may Jessamyn? If not, why not?

Can you make some sense, please?

I meant to ask if he payed you. I have no idea how I mistyped that.

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 22:56:22 -0800

*paid

By: mediareport

mediareport — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 23:00:30 -0800

*pops in*

Is now a good time to mention again that MeFi needs a third moderator who lives in either Europe, Asia or Australia?

*pops out*

By: mediareport

mediareport — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 23:02:10 -0800

Or Africa?

*pops*

By: Tacos Are Pretty Great

Tacos Are Pretty Great — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 23:14:23 -0800

my favorite part was when he was all like *backpedaling* ha ha just an observation guys no need to get defensive now...trust me: you'll know when i'm being a dick *backpedaling*

That cracked me up.

By: pyramid termite

pyramid termite — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 23:18:07 -0800

Everyone knows cleaning out the drain is the hardest part of bathing lepers.

no, the hardest part is when they give you the finger ... or two ... or three ...

By: jonson

jonson — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 23:28:35 -0800

Uh, the filthy lepers & I would appreciate it if you'd all grow up and stop making jokes at their expense. And cortex: touche, my friend, touche.

By: bob sarabia

bob sarabia — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 23:46:19 -0800

Is now a good time to mention again that MeFi needs a third moderator who lives in either Europe, Asia or Australia?

That's a good idea. There should be an admin in a different part of of the world to cover downtime of the US admins. And I'm sure there is a good brit canidate who could swing it.

By: bob sarabia

bob sarabia — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 23:49:16 -0800

Actually, I wonder if someone in Korean would be a good admin.

By: Joeforking

Joeforking — Fri, 22 Sep 2006 01:27:02 -0800

People who post their location on their profile page just don't understand transporter beams.

By: clevershark

clevershark — Fri, 22 Sep 2006 06:37:54 -0800

Anyone else find it funny that the question was posted at 4:21PM?

By: blue_beetle

blue_beetle — Fri, 22 Sep 2006 07:35:02 -0800

George Bush doesn't care about transnational site admins.

By: languagehat

languagehat — Fri, 22 Sep 2006 08:29:13 -0800

This thread is full of the funny but this is the exchange that made me laugh till tears ran down my cheeks, pooled on the floor, and drowned my cats:

I'm getting shagged up the arse right now and I can still type okay.

Worst. Buttsecks. Evar.

By: Mitheral

Mitheral — Fri, 22 Sep 2006 09:19:41 -0800

blue_beetle writes "That's like saying, if you want to talk about news items, go to GoogleGroups, or some random website. "

You mean like sportsfilter? Lots of huge community sites exist on the web (SA, Fark, Photo.net) and there isn't any reason to copy them all here.

pyramid termite writes "why is the short answer longer than the long answer? ."

The long answer includes the complete text of the short answer.

By: blasdelf

blasdelf — Fri, 22 Sep 2006 15:20:40 -0800

I nominated stavros for the position of Eastern Hemisphere Moderator in regards to another thread that began to longboat as the result of sleeping moderators.

By: languagehat

languagehat — Fri, 22 Sep 2006 17:21:11 -0800

Stavros is too damn cranky.