Have ye forgotten then?

September 19, 2012 9:36 AM

Arr! Have ye scurvy dogs forgotten then? It's officially Talk Like A Pirate Day so ye best start using the pirate lingo, else ye be walkin' the plank!
posted by Lynsey to MetaFilter-Related at 9:36 AM (86 comments total)

No.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:37 AM on September 19, 2012 [14 favorites]

Not "forgotten" so much as "didn't care enough to remember in the first place".
posted by Egg Shen at 9:41 AM on September 19, 2012 [5 favorites]

We actually had a Talk Like A Pirate post this morning, but it had a couple of fuckery self-links in it. So I guess today I am celebrating Ban Like A British Navy Captain day.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:42 AM on September 19, 2012 [65 favorites]

I have not yet figured out why this is a thing.
posted by shakespeherian at 9:43 AM on September 19, 2012 [8 favorites]

I thought it was "Walk Like a Pirate Day", so I've been walking like I have syphilis and a severe bladder stone.
posted by inturnaround at 9:45 AM on September 19, 2012 [9 favorites]

Arrr! I actually fully support type-on-the-internet-like-a-pirate-day, but I think I would prefer a consolidation with CAPSLOCK day. so, to re-iterate: ARRRR!
posted by juv3nal at 9:47 AM on September 19, 2012

I was excited about this for the first few years I knew about it, but now it's kind of boring and annoying.
posted by needs more cowbell at 9:48 AM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

Not Even Pirates Spoke "Pirate" :(
posted by batmonkey at 9:50 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]

Ye best start believing in pirate threads. You're in one!
posted by 2bucksplus at 9:51 AM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]

I was amused that tech publisher O'Reilly is celebrating Talk Like a Pirate Day with discounted R books.
posted by needled at 9:54 AM on September 19, 2012 [4 favorites]

FUCK DRM. GODDAMNIT, INFORMATION WANTS TO BE FREE. MY BITTORRENTS! LET ME SHOW THEM TO YOU!

or, if you prefer,
GIVE ME THE GODDAMNED KEYS TO THE CARGO OR I WILL SPLATTER YOUR CHILDRENS BRAINS ON THE DECK OF THIS BOAT.

also, piracy reporting center.
posted by rmd1023 at 9:54 AM on September 19, 2012 [7 favorites]

I have not yet figured out why this is a thing.

I'm guessing they're hoping people will give them rum.
posted by zarq at 9:55 AM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

d00d this office keygen u gave me had kenzero wtf
posted by griphus at 9:58 AM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]

Why is this a MetaTalk thread?
posted by cribcage at 10:01 AM on September 19, 2012 [6 favorites]

You know why pirates wore eyepatches? Not because they were missing an eye. It was so they could be fighting with swords on the deck outside in the bright sun, and then when they go to the dark-ass interior, they would switch the patch/flip it up and use their already dark sensitive eye underneath the patch to fight belowdecks!

The more you know.
posted by Grither at 10:03 AM on September 19, 2012 [6 favorites]

wait. you're saying if I comply with this pirate thing, I could be given rum?!

ARRR, believe you, me: I be sore committed t' th' entire shipmate dialogue endeavour, what wi' th' walkin' o' planks an' shiverin' o' timbers. As I be clearly Captain material, I need nay worry about swabbin' th' deck, but I be always ready fer any swashbucklin' tasks that need doin'. As long as thar`s some good spicy rum in 't fer me, anyway.
posted by batmonkey at 10:06 AM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

You know why pirates wore eyepatches?

asavage already told us that, dude.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:07 AM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

YO HO HO AND A BOTTLE OF COKE ZERO!
posted by yellowbinder at 10:11 AM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]

Talk Like A Pirate Day marks the anniversary of when my wife and I spoke for the first time. In this case, 10 years ago. I know I don't normally talk like a pirate and I suspect that she doesn't either, but it's amazing the way these little white lies early on in a relationship just compound and become the status quo. We even named our kid after a pirate in order to keep the illusion that we're Pirate People going. Some day, I hope, we'll be able to come clean to each other, but if that happens, who knows what other secrets will come out?
posted by robocop is bleeding at 10:12 AM on September 19, 2012 [7 favorites]

I have a Letter Of Marque from the crown so I will celebrate Talk Like A Perfectly Respectable Privateer Day
posted by The Whelk at 10:13 AM on September 19, 2012 [10 favorites]

cortex: "We actually had a Talk Like A Pirate post this morning, but it had a couple of fuckery self-links in it. So I guess today I am celebrating Ban Like A British Navy Captain day."

He is a mod most in-de-fat-i-gable!
He bans when e'er he's able!
posted by boo_radley at 10:17 AM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

R
posted by 4ster at 10:19 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]

what do you mean, "wrong musical"?
posted by boo_radley at 10:19 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]

EmpressCallipygos: "asavage already told us that, dude."

Where do you think he learned it from??

I just like that fact, sheesh, do we have to cite EVERYTHING we say now?
we probably do, don't we? Sigh.
posted by Grither at 10:26 AM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

The thing is, if you've ever heard of The Wurzels, pirate speech has lost all cred.
posted by Jehan at 10:26 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]

But I am a pirate. This is how I talk.

Fuck stereotypes.
posted by Sys Rq at 10:27 AM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]

I'm not very good with accents/dialects, so I don't even try. Sorry to ruin y'all's fun with my inability to mimic dialects.
posted by muddgirl at 10:28 AM on September 19, 2012

Is this even really a Thing? I've never actually heard anyone talk like a pirate on this day. All I see are a bunch of Facebook and Twitter and Metafilter comments where people say "YAR! IT BE TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY!" and that's usually the extent of it.

I think if anyone actually came up to me and talked like a pirate I'd just sort of give them A Look and walk away.

Also, I always heard pirates wore eye patches because they blew out their eyes sighting on the sun with their sextant.
posted by bondcliff at 10:38 AM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

Only 10k download speeds? Seed, you fucking parasites!
posted by Burhanistan at 10:46 AM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]

I prefer the old jivenet. Slap ma fro'!
posted by Melismata at 10:47 AM on September 19, 2012

Don't pirates speak Somali?
posted by TedW at 10:49 AM on September 19, 2012

One of the little secret twists in Gene Wolfe's Pirate Freedom is that the 17th century pirate captain who spews the most jargon is almost certainly an undercover time traveler. Most of his lingo ("lay o' the land," "set her cap") dates from the 1800s.
posted by Iridic at 11:00 AM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

Huufarkarafkayga waxaa ka buuxa kallumayso!

Hey, I did speak like a pirate...a Somali one. That means "My hovercraft is full of fish."
posted by Devils Slide at 11:12 AM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]

cortex: "We actually had a Talk Like A Pirate post this morning, but it had a couple of fuckery self-links in it. So I guess today I am celebrating Ban Like A British Navy Captain day."

He is a mod most in-de-fat-i-gable!
He bans when e'er he's able!

He is the very model of a modern Meta moderator.
posted by Kabanos at 11:28 AM on September 19, 2012 [6 favorites]

I thought it was:
Huufarkarafkayga waxaa ka buuxa eels
posted by jenkinsEar at 11:32 AM on September 19, 2012

Talk Like a Pirate Day is like International Bacon Day. Except I eat bacon on International Bacon Day.

But seriously: This morning, the extremely hip and with it local news team was all about Talk Like a Pirate Day. Especially the co-anchor who kept saying "Arrrrgh." She must have mistaken it for Talk Like an Aggravated Pirate Day. The fool. That's in May.
posted by SpiffyRob at 11:38 AM on September 19, 2012

I thought it was:
Huufarkarafkayga waxaa ka buuxa eels

It is, but I wanted to avoid using an English word.
posted by Devils Slide at 11:43 AM on September 19, 2012

I updated to iOS 6 and felt nothing.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:44 AM on September 19, 2012

Somali pirates speak Arabic, which sounds much nicer than your mongrel English even when they're talking about launching RPGs at container ships.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:45 AM on September 19, 2012

The new Siri wench isn't all she's cracked up to be, eh Burhanistan.
posted by HuronBob at 11:47 AM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

needs more cowbell: I was excited about this for the first few years I knew about it, but now it's kind of boring and annoying.

No no. We save sentences like that for Talk Like a Hipster Day.
posted by MsMolly at 11:53 AM on September 19, 2012 [7 favorites]

I updated to iOS 6 and felt nothing.

Did you post that to Facebook?!
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:03 PM on September 19, 2012

THERE IS ACTUALLY REAL PIRATE NEWS TODAY NOT JUST FAKE STUFF.

THIS IS MY FAVORITEST PIRATE ARRRR.
posted by bukvich at 12:10 PM on September 19, 2012

I liked Talk Like a Pirate day back when we used to have to do it in person. I'm not sure what kind of hipster that makes me, probably just old.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 12:15 PM on September 19, 2012

I have my Facebook set to "Pirate" speak (because it's funny!), so talk like a pirate day doesn't do much for me.
posted by patheral at 12:40 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

I am the very model of a modern day Bit Torrenter,
I watch my first run movies more quickly than I oughter to,
And each week I watch the Doctor before you are able to,
I am the very model of a modern day Bit Torrenter !

Arrrggghhhh !
posted by Podkayne of Pasadena at 12:43 PM on September 19, 2012

Pirate Love
posted by InfidelZombie at 12:56 PM on September 19, 2012

This thread is now post your banal iOS 6 panorama shots.

Here's the shower in my office restroom.
posted by Burhanistan at 1:08 PM on September 19, 2012

I made up these "ha-ha-the-other-kind-of-pirate" jokes on Facebook (though I can't possibly be the originator of the first one):

Q: What was the pirate's favorite Californian city?

A: Torrance.

Q: Name two pirate horror movies.

A: THE BAD SEED and THE GIANT LEECHES


You guys, I kind of hate myself. Like a lot.
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 1:09 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

So I guess today I am celebrating Ban Like A British Navy Captain day.

I'll get the rum, sodomy, and the lash ready.
posted by corb at 1:20 PM on September 19, 2012

I say, is that a frigate?
posted by clavdivs at 1:29 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

Is this where I get to mention that I pronounce 'Pirates' like 'Pilates'?

Takeaway: I'm much more annoying in real life.
posted by mazola at 1:39 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

I've always assumed Talk Like a Pirate Day was one of those early memes that helped early internet users identify themselves as being "in the know" about the information superhighway. It feels very Usenet, for some reason.

Unlike caps lock day, which is universally awesome.
posted by charred husk at 1:58 PM on September 19, 2012

Double the rum and hold the lash for me, matey. I'll let ye know about the sodomy ere sundown.
posted by Mister_A at 2:01 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

"I ask you, have you ever known what it is to be an orphan?"
"Often!"
"Yes, orphan. Have you ever known what it is to be one?"
"I say, often."
"Often, often, often."
"I don’t think we quite understand one another. I ask you, have you ever known what it is to be an orphan, and you say “orphan”. As I understand you, you are merely repeating the word “orphan” to show that you understand me."
"I didn’t repeat the word often."
"Pardon me, you did indeed."
"I only repeated it once."
"True, but you repeated it."
"But not often."
posted by still_wears_a_hat at 2:02 PM on September 19, 2012 [5 favorites]

I work in a major technical support center, and believe me, in certain circles Talk Like a Pirate Day is alive and well and annoying. Except for the bags of Pirate's Booty that management handed out. Those are less annoying. They are bootylicious.
posted by darksasami at 2:29 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel stuffed in the front of his pants.

The bartender says, "Hey pirate, why do you have a ship's wheel stuffed in the front of your pants?"

The pirate says "Yarrr, it be drivin' me nuts."
posted by BeeDo at 2:36 PM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]

Arrrhh, ye have brought this man unto me, as one that perverteth the people; and behold, I, having examined him before you, have found no fault in this man touching those things whereof ye accuse him! I wash my hands of this matter! Arrrhh!

Wait, what?
posted by newmoistness at 2:36 PM on September 19, 2012 [10 favorites]

This got real old sometime around 2004.
posted by dunkadunc at 3:17 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

This will never get old you scurvy dog.
posted by bukvich at 3:33 PM on September 19, 2012

I've 8een talking like a pir8 all day thankyou very much!!!!!!!!
posted by emmtee at 4:12 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]

I met up with MeFi people today! Unfortunately, their MeFi usernames I don't really remember (something about a hockey player, possibly?) but whose real names I do remember (mostly because they are now programmed into my phone) -- via a strange chain of events that led to me visiting #mefi on slashnet and then bitching about Iowa wherein someone was like 'OH HEY I LIVE THERE'

then we met up and they have an extremely cute baby. That is not the point. The point is this:

I was really considering wearing an eyepatch, because Talk Like a Pirate Day, but mostly I didn't feel like I could pull it off, so instead I went with the otherwise nerdiest ensemble possible that was unweird enough to pass for normal on the first glance so that they would recognize me: Star Trek t-shirt which proudly states that Vulcan girls do it with logic, a circuit board necklace, earrings made from repurposed motherboards, and a Slytherin scarf. I thought to myself: perfect! I am completely unmistakable for anything other than the world's biggest geek!

... then I got to the restaurant where they were meeting me for lunch and the fuckers beat me there.
posted by saveyoursanity at 4:16 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

/sets fire to a unicorn, a ninja, a zombie and some bacon.
posted by Artw at 4:32 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]

Is this where I get to mention that I pronounce 'Pirates' like 'Pilates'?

For a couple years after Pilates became a thing, I was pretty sure it was pronounced to rhyme with "pirates." I guess I don't spend much time face-to-face with members of the Pilate-doing demographic. (Wait, is there a singular form? Can you have one Pilate? They need to put up a FAQ on this stuff....)
posted by nebulawindphone at 4:47 PM on September 19, 2012

Pirates by themselves have been played the hell out, you need to add in a few superlatives to it. For example: Space. Space Pirates. That's hella interesting. Space ninjas. Woah now, this is really going places now. SPACE ZOMBIES. Feel that? that's your pop-cultural ennui evaporating.

All I need now is for someone to get me 5 minutes to a Cartoon Network Executive, and I can pitch Puppy Space Pirates.
posted by hellojed at 4:49 PM on September 19, 2012

Wait, is there a singular form?

Yes, he's called Pontius.
posted by kengraham at 4:59 PM on September 19, 2012 [5 favorites]

Arrrhh!

Sailors seem to rather testily insist that it is "yar." Adjust your jokes accordingly, lest ye be belayed.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:15 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

mazola and nebulawindphone, something like that pronunciation confusion is exactly what got poor Frederick in trouble in the first place.
posted by tangerine at 5:20 PM on September 19, 2012 [2 favorites]

Space pirates with space zombies?

firefly was cancelled YEARS ago, move on people.
posted by The Whelk at 5:23 PM on September 19, 2012

Sailors seem to rather testily insist that it is "yar." Adjust your jokes accordingly, lest ye be belayed.


Wait, like in The Philadelphia Story? That explains a lot...
posted by running order squabble fest at 5:25 PM on September 19, 2012

Gimme the Loot
posted by homunculus at 5:44 PM on September 19, 2012

Feds Charrrge Activist with 13 Felonies for Rogue Downloading of Academic Arrrticles
posted by homunculus at 5:45 PM on September 19, 2012

What kind of exercise do pirates enjoy the most?

Caarrrrdiovascular.

What is the most likely part of a car engine to break down in a pirate's Buick?

The haarrrrmonic balancer.

What area of physics is of greatest interest to pirates?

Qaarrrrks (especially chaarrrrm).
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 6:49 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

Knock knock

who's there?

Arrrrrhhgho

Arrrrrhhgho who?

Arrrrrhhghofukyursef.
posted by mule98J at 7:49 PM on September 19, 2012 [3 favorites]

Who is my personal hero on Talk Like a Pirate Day?

Stephen Decaturrrrrrrr.
posted by michaelh at 7:57 PM on September 19, 2012 [1 favorite]

A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel stuffed in the front of his pants.

The bartender says, "Hey pirate, why do you have a ship's wheel stuffed in the front of your pants?"

The pirate says "Yarrr, it be drivin' me nuts."

Hey, you know, we were all there, Doug. You can stop telling the story!
posted by tickingclock at 1:03 AM on September 20, 2012

I went to Long John Silver's yesterday because my blood cholesterol was dangerously low. They had a deal where you had to talk like a pirate to get a free piece of fish.

I asked the lady at the window if a lot of people had spoken to her like a pirate. She rolled her eyes, sighed deeply and said, "Yes. You're supposed to talk like a pirate to get the free fish. If I could live the rest of my life and never hear someone trying to speak like a pirate, that would be wonderful." I told her that I was sorry and that I didn't need free fish badly enough to do that to her. She smiled and thanked me.

The entire meal, for myself and my kids, was free.
posted by double block and bleed at 4:29 AM on September 20, 2012 [8 favorites]

Oi likes to eat my friends and make no bones about it.
posted by h00py at 5:55 AM on September 20, 2012 [1 favorite]

I think it is possible that this has become kind of played out.
posted by thelonius at 6:06 AM on September 20, 2012 [1 favorite]

Ahoy to this thread.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 6:14 AM on September 20, 2012 [1 favorite]

Congratulations Admiral Morgan
posted by Potomac Avenue at 6:21 AM on September 20, 2012 [1 favorite]

The entire meal, for myself and my kids, was free.

If you look at this another way, that was Blackmail Like a Pirate Day.
posted by GenjiandProust at 10:07 AM on September 20, 2012 [4 favorites]

"A DRUNKEN woman stole a passenger ferry on the River Dart and shouted 'I'm Jack Sparrow' and 'I'm a pirate' as she drifted away from police on the shore, a court has been told."
posted by Abiezer at 2:29 PM on September 20, 2012

When I worked for Citigroup, people heard about this and tried to do the talking like pirates thing.

They weren't good at it. At all. And they kept trying and failing. The entire place sounded like someone took the pre-movie Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disney World and spliced it together with 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea, and they thought they were ever so funny and witty and aren't we cool. And I lost some hearing trying not to listen to them, especially when they would answer the emergency call-in line doing it, and try to get other people, many of whom were going crazy with technical issues, to talk like them when they should have been helping resolve network outages and crashed servers.

And that's why I kind of hate this thing.
posted by mephron at 7:19 PM on September 20, 2012

Congratulations Admiral Morgan

Fox And Friends: Obama Spurns Netanyahu For Pirate (He Didn’t)
posted by homunculus at 7:44 PM on September 20, 2012

GenjiandProust: "The entire meal, for myself and my kids, was free.

If you look at this another way, that was Blackmail Like a Pirate Day."

Nah, she was just sharing the loot.
posted by double block and bleed at 5:34 PM on September 21, 2012