Comments on: Bananas in the Break Room

Bananas in the Break Room

noonday — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 08:08:38 -0800

This has been driving me nuts: where is the post about bananas in the break room?

There was a ask metafilter post a few years ago that had to do with the complete meltdown of a multinational corporation's email system initiated by a well-intentioned email about "bananas in the breakroom". I cannot find it for the life of me. I've searched, believe me. My usual approach isn't working here. I thought I'd appeal to you all before I come to the conclusion that I just dreamed up the whole thing

By: jedicus

jedicus — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 08:10:28 -0800

It's this comment on the blue.

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 08:10:46 -0800

the name of the post is UNSUBSCRIBE ME FROM THIS LIST and it is on the blue

search FREE BANANAS IN THE KITCHEN

By: cortex

cortex — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 08:14:17 -0800

Hey, it's from— dammit.

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 08:16:42 -0800

My brain is full of nominally useless trivia and yet it is a sincere trial to remember to put on pants before I leave the house.

By: MuffinMan

MuffinMan — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 08:22:28 -0800

It is not cool to turn one of your colleagues into a random piece of fruit.

Whomever did this, change Andy back into his human form ASAP.

By: jessamyn

jessamyn — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 08:25:44 -0800

Oh I forgot how much I loved that story. Added to the BestOf blog.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 08:28:58 -0800

Fruitomancy is the darkest of arts.

By: noonday

noonday — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 08:41:45 -0800

Yes!!!! That was it!!
Many thanks.

By: Brandon Blatcher

Brandon Blatcher — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 08:58:50 -0800

That is one of the best told stories ever. The setup and punch line are perfect.

By: steef

steef — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 09:09:57 -0800

TO: Distribution_list RE: Plums in the icebox

By: Blasdelb

Blasdelb — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 09:45:41 -0800

As a side note, I totally understand for awesome old stuff thike this, but I've noticed the sidebar falling into disue and some great things going onto the best of blog without making it to the sidebar as well.

By: Philosopher Dirtbike

Philosopher Dirtbike — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 10:36:58 -0800

That is one of the best told stories ever. The setup and punch line are perfect.

What bugs me is that the story goes that the CEO typed his email and THEN hit "Reply All". But actually, you'd have to do it the other way around.

THE WHOLE STORY IS BUILT ON LIES

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 10:37:06 -0800

Sometimes I wish my company was bigger so I could do this.

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 10:55:08 -0800

You would ruin it all as an elaborate setup for a Fresh Prince shaggy dog joke though.

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 10:55:35 -0800

because you are a ruiner who ruins things

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 10:56:56 -0800

Shakesperian is the PRINCE OF LIES

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 10:57:52 -0800

NEVER FORGET

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:04:47 -0800

basically history's greatest monster

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:08:57 -0800

How did that never get sidebarred, btw.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:09:54 -0800

because you're wrong on the inside.

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:10:30 -0800

i lol'd

By: jessamyn

jessamyn — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:11:35 -0800

I've noticed the sidebar falling into disue and some great things going onto the best of blog without making it to the sidebar as well.

The sidebar is the thing we use now much more for site-specific stuff that won't make sense to people off the site, or for "hey check out this post/comment you might have missed" Stuff that answers the question "Why might someone who didn't know much about MetaFilter enjoy reading MetaFilter?" it's usually posted ot BestOf. NB: if you read the blog at bestof.metafilter.com, it has both the sidebar and BestOf content on it.

By: arcticseal

arcticseal — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:14:53 -0800

Will someone please think of the mulberries?

By: ardgedee

ardgedee — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:16:37 -0800

> Shakesperian is the PRINCE OF LIES

All his best comments were written by baconian.

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:25:54 -0800

i don't get it

By: Kattullus

Kattullus — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:36:58 -0800

shakepeherian's crime

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:39:22 -0800

the set-up

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:40:43 -0800

why isn't he in Internet Jail by now I mean

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:41:15 -0800

I'M READING IT ALL AGAIN RIGHT NOW AND I HATE YOU SO MUCH

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:42:32 -0800

THIS WOUND
WILL NEVER
HEAL

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:43:27 -0800

CRAWLING IN MY TATER SKIN

By: elizardbits

elizardbits — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:43:56 -0800

i feel like the three of us should have a terrible publc-access cable talk show

By: Jofus

Jofus — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:46:35 -0800

Jesus fuck. I bet there were people in Hitler's pottery class in Berlin in the 1945 who were all like "He declared war against who now? Henry, did you hear about this with Hitler?"

By: daniel_charms

daniel_charms — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:47:32 -0800

Never get into a land war in Asia, and never trust a shakespeherian when taters are on the line.

By: Jofus

Jofus — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:47:41 -0800

Yes, shakespherian. Hitler. Actual Hitler.

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:48:45 -0800

Well I mean I'm a pretty mediocre painter but that's just mean.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:49:11 -0800

You're walking in Berlin

there's no one around and you have no phone

out of the corner of your eye you spy him

Hilter.

By: Brandon Blatcher

Brandon Blatcher — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 11:51:17 -0800

You're a Looper!

By: Greg Nog

Greg Nog — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 12:17:52 -0800

God, I still am blown away by how good this single comment of shakespeherian's is, in response to people asking for more info on the taters story. Just straightforward blithely-friendly opaque denial-of-desire. Perfect, perfect. Perfect.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 12:20:19 -0800

SEE WHAT WE MEAN.

MONSTER.

By: Greg Nog

Greg Nog — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 12:21:56 -0800

Also this:

So we finally got to the neighborhood and spent about fifteen minutes going the wrong way on a north-south street because we weren't familiar with the area and I'm rubbish at navigation (I'm from San Diego originally and have trouble orienting myself without mountains on the horizon).

is making me roll around in bliss like a dog on a patch of grass. SO FUCKING USELESS. Such WHOLLY UNNECESSARY INFORMATION. He typed it. He typed it and MADE ME READ IT. Ah! Sublime.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 12:23:43 -0800

Shakesperian is a skilled fabulist (read LIAR)

By: Jofus

Jofus — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 14:18:02 -0800

Hitler allusions notwithstanding, Shakespeherian is the best at Metafilter. Also his name is almost impossible to spell the same way twice.

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 14:22:40 -0800

After logging in to so many things over the years I now have to catch myself whenever I spell Shakespeare's name.

By: subbes

subbes — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 17:34:11 -0800

Of course, the taters lady did return later to reveal it was an euphemism for porn. But her comment wasn't nearly so fun.

(Also shakespeherian you are worse than Stalin.)

By: IndigoRain

IndigoRain — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 17:47:44 -0800

The Whelk: "Shakesperian is a skilled fabulist (read LIAR)"

You mean Shakespeherian.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 18:30:41 -0800

The god of deciet has many names.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 18:43:29 -0800

Anyway how much would it take to get a cable access call in show anyway?

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 20:40:12 -0800

The first expense is flying you two out here.

By: batmonkey

batmonkey — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 20:57:49 -0800

She also said she cringes whenever she comes across it, which means I cringe whenever I come across it. So awkward!

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 21:01:57 -0800

Call in show. You get to call-in Shakes. Or appear as a spectral vision on a light-up globe

By: davejay

davejay — Mon, 08 Oct 2012 23:05:04 -0800

Oh god, that just brought back memories of my first internet-related job, when I set up my first mailing list and, despite not being done, reluctantly gave the mailing list address to the owner of the small business who had hired us, with the instruction not to use it yet. Not only did he use it, but he used it to "test" sending an attachment of hundreds of customers' names, addresses, phone numbers and emails. As I'd misconfigured the mailing list (I wasn't done yet!) the mail went out instead of into moderation, and every reply to the list went out to everyone on the list, and some of the people were using WebTV for f's sake, and so it was taking them hours to slog through all the replies (and then of course to reply in complaint, making it worse) and the phone calls I had to make to calm people down and not sue us, good lord it was awful. And the owner of that small business loudly and repeatedly accused me of sending the mail that kicked it all off, although he never had an explanation for how I'd gotten a list of the customers' names and addresses and phone numbers and emails. Gah.

At least I now know what I'll be dreaming about.

By: flaterik

flaterik — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 01:13:35 -0800

Of course, the taters lady did return later to reveal it was an euphemism for porn. But her comment wasn't nearly so fun.

Wait, what? Really? How were we all not alerted?!

But now it feels less special.

By: misha

misha — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 11:42:23 -0800

Kickstarter: podcast with all of you.

Also, I want to get shakespeherian a book deal.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 11:54:06 -0800

Kickstarter: podcast with all of you.

No cause then we'd have to reveal what we actually talk about.

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 11:58:37 -0800

Oh god so embarrassing.

By: The Whelk

The Whelk — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 12:03:13 -0800

I'm so not cool with your Derek Hale/Steve Rogers fic Tim

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 12:17:14 -0800

Are you saying it made you hot

By: Afroblanco

Afroblanco — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 13:44:08 -0800

Thank you! I've been looking for this forever. For some reason I thought it was from DailyWTF, but I couldn't find it there. Thanks for rescuing this from the memory hole!

By: Pallas Athena

Pallas Athena — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 15:49:27 -0800

Reading that comment again made me laugh so hard the cat jumped off my lap in disgust. Now she's washing her crotch at me.

By: garius

garius — Wed, 10 Oct 2012 05:13:46 -0800

Ah. Was wondering why that had just popped up on the "Best Of" blog. This explains it.

After several years I'm almost tempted to reveal who the uber-boss was, but I probably shouldn't just to be safe (he's still alive, and in the House of Lords).

If anyone really cares that much though memail me and I'll tell you, on super-secret-mefi-honour that you don't spread the name around.

By: ersatz

ersatz — Wed, 10 Oct 2012 06:27:58 -0800

NB: if you read the blog at bestof.metafilter.com, it has both the sidebar and BestOf content on it.

A small link to the blog in the sidebar might be useful then. I was under the impression that the blog only included sidebar content.

By: Lemurrhea

Lemurrhea — Wed, 10 Oct 2012 07:48:05 -0800

Anyway how much would it take to get a cable access call in show anyway?

I think it's a lot cheaper if you tape it ahead of time.