A Vicious Cycle October 3, 2013 9:27 PM Subscribe
I'm concerned about the pattern that's developed with dekathalon's questions in AskMe.
Here are some recent examples. These threads tend to accumulate a substantial number of replies and most generally end up turning into a back in forth in which dekathalon rejects or disqualifies the merits of all advice given.
I am torn between worry for the poster's health and well-being, thoughts that these questions often don't seem like a good-faith use of the site (this comment really hit the mark on this matter), and wondering if this pattern is helpful for either the user or the responders.
Here are some recent examples. These threads tend to accumulate a substantial number of replies and most generally end up turning into a back in forth in which dekathalon rejects or disqualifies the merits of all advice given.
I am torn between worry for the poster's health and well-being, thoughts that these questions often don't seem like a good-faith use of the site (this comment really hit the mark on this matter), and wondering if this pattern is helpful for either the user or the responders.
This post was deleted for the following reason: Not sure any good can come from this, better to delete than close. We'll talk to the user. -- mathowie
I'm fairly certain the mods have talked to her about this previously.
posted by empath at 9:32 PM on October 3, 2013
posted by empath at 9:32 PM on October 3, 2013
There is absolutely nothing that internet strangers can do to help that woman. I have stopped answering her questions because they make me so angry and sad.
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:41 PM on October 3, 2013 [4 favorites]
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:41 PM on October 3, 2013 [4 favorites]
I really hope dekathlon gets professional help. My heart goes out to her, but I feel like she's radioing us for recipe suggestions from the Titanic. Serve the shrimp, who cares, your ship is sinking!
posted by Sidhedevil at 9:42 PM on October 3, 2013 [4 favorites]
posted by Sidhedevil at 9:42 PM on October 3, 2013 [4 favorites]
There is also absolutely no good that can come of this MeTa. I really hope a mod closes it fast.
posted by palomar at 9:42 PM on October 3, 2013 [7 favorites]
posted by palomar at 9:42 PM on October 3, 2013 [7 favorites]
I have stopped answering her questions because they make me so angry and sad.
Same, it's very frustrating to see so many mefites really selflessly making heartfelt and genuine offers of assistance and getting shot down again and again. But I assume it is like addiction wherein the individual has to choose for themselves when and where and how they finally decide to get help.
posted by elizardbits at 9:44 PM on October 3, 2013 [2 favorites]
Same, it's very frustrating to see so many mefites really selflessly making heartfelt and genuine offers of assistance and getting shot down again and again. But I assume it is like addiction wherein the individual has to choose for themselves when and where and how they finally decide to get help.
posted by elizardbits at 9:44 PM on October 3, 2013 [2 favorites]
She is someone who doesn't actually want help. She clearly NEEDS a good therapist, but she doesn't WANT one, and instead turns to Ask for attention.
I used to have a friend like that. Way too High Maintenance, caused me so much stress that my RA was constantly boiling over. It's unfortunate and unhealthy all around.
posted by MissySedai at 9:47 PM on October 3, 2013
I used to have a friend like that. Way too High Maintenance, caused me so much stress that my RA was constantly boiling over. It's unfortunate and unhealthy all around.
posted by MissySedai at 9:47 PM on October 3, 2013
Yeah, this is kind of a weird thread aimed at just a single user. I'm going to close it up.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:48 PM on October 3, 2013 [5 favorites]
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:48 PM on October 3, 2013 [5 favorites]
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by HeKilledKennedy at 9:30 PM on October 3, 2013