107: Breakin' the Dowels with ColdChef
 transcript  August 3, 2015 2:47 PM   Subscribe

Hey, it's episode 107 of the MetaFilter Best of the Web podcast, featuring special guest host GJ "ColdChef" Charlet, who joins me and Jessamyn to chat for about 90 minutes about Metafilter favorites, learning to drive stick shift, dealing with emotional labor, and a whole bunch of interesting funeral and graveyard tidbits.

posted by cortex to MeFi Podcast at 2:47 PM (58 comments total) 12 users marked this as a favorite

Also, hey! If you're a listener, and use iTunes at all, and haven't ever gone by the iTunes page for the podcast to give it a little star rating and a review, that'd be keen! We never remember to remind folks about that sort of thing, but here I am, remembering to remind folks. Considered yourself reminded!
posted by cortex (staff) at 2:49 PM on August 3, 2015 [4 favorites]


Hahahaha only 10 minutes in but I don't miss Matt... (don't tell him)
posted by one4themoment at 3:13 PM on August 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yeah, Matt's been pretty slammed with his new work at Slack, so he bowed out for the time being. We'd been talking about trying to have mefites on the show a little bit more anyway, so this seemed like a good excuse to just jump in head first, and GJ was as much of a charmer and a good sport as you'd expect if you've ever met the guy. Was a bunch of fun.
posted by cortex (staff) at 3:15 PM on August 3, 2015 [4 favorites]


ColdChef on the podcast! What a treat! Thanks for having him.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 3:21 PM on August 3, 2015 [4 favorites]


Wicked!
posted by rtha at 3:26 PM on August 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


I totes miss Matt but having ColdChef on is a stroke of brilliance. Great to hear his voice.
posted by joseph conrad is fully awesome at 3:27 PM on August 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


ColdChef: "Without going too deep,"
cortex: "Just about six feet..."
RESPECT.
posted by joseph conrad is fully awesome at 3:46 PM on August 3, 2015 [12 favorites]


Thanks, cortex and Jessamyn. Y'all were very kind to a nervous guest. If I sound overly awkward during the podcast (and I do) it's because I had to keep reminding myself that I was not just listening to my favorite show, I was supposed to be participating in it. And despite being a guest, I missed hearing from Matt, too.
posted by ColdChef at 4:01 PM on August 3, 2015 [13 favorites]


You were great ColdChef!
posted by one4themoment at 4:05 PM on August 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


Yay! When I asked to bow out of the podcast to catch up on work for a while, my first choice was Coldchef so seeing this pop up today in my podcast client was a total treat. I can't wait to listen to it on the way home tonight, thanks for volunteering GJ!
posted by mathowie (retired) at 4:06 PM on August 3, 2015 [5 favorites]


The fpp story by ColdChef is very funny, I am dining out on that and remembering it when one of my own fpps falls flat...

(My husband says: 'eh, some of them just don't catch fire...')
posted by joseph conrad is fully awesome at 4:36 PM on August 3, 2015


Dang episode is not showing up on iTunes yet. I want to hear coldchef's sweet southern accent on the go!
posted by radioamy at 4:40 PM on August 3, 2015


Does anyone have a version of the 'herpes test results' link that works for people without a twitter account? It says "Sorry, you are not authorized to see this status."
posted by Rhomboid at 4:55 PM on August 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


GJ was as much of a charmer and a good sport as you'd expect if you've ever met the guy.

That's a lot
posted by Greg Nog at 5:16 PM on August 3, 2015 [3 favorites]


WHY DID DOG OF WISDOM NOT MAKE PODCAST I AM DISSAPOINT
posted by vrakatar at 5:40 PM on August 3, 2015


Does anyone have a version of the 'herpes test results' link that works for people without a twitter account? It says "Sorry, you are not authorized to see this status."

Yeah, dang, I forgot GJ's account is protected. I'll let him rebroadcast it if he wants, I suppose it does have his mailing address on it.

WHY DID DOG OF WISDOM NOT MAKE PODCAST I AM DISSAPOINT

Oh my gosh, I only saw that in passing the other day on mlkshk; I didn't know there was a post and I was thinking about making one!
posted by cortex (staff) at 5:44 PM on August 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


This is - honestly and for real - the first podcast I've ever listened to for more than 2 minutes. I listened all the way through and I can' t wait for the next one. Cool beans.
posted by VioletU at 6:15 PM on August 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


Same here! Loved it, and I'm so glad I tuned in.

And ColdChef, since you're on the hunt for beet recipes, here's my favorite: Beet Ice Cream with Mascarpone, Orange Zest, and Poppy Seeds. I know it sounds weird, but I swear it's amazing.

Great job, y'all!
posted by shiu mai baby at 6:34 PM on August 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


What do people incorrectly believe to be universal?

Those stories are always so great. The differences are interesting, but I think the genuine incredulity is what gives me the most pleasure, like we can't even imagine that people are different in an activity that if we think about it carefully, can certainly have a number of variables. It's just the private repetition of something over a number of years that makes us feel like something is universal because we haven't experienced it otherwise. That's an interesting phenomenon that probably has broader cultural applications.

I told this story before, and I didn't see it in the thread, but my wife and I argued for awhile about whether or not aspargus made your pee smell funny. I insisted it did, she was not convinced that it happened at all and I was imagining it. Then we happened to watch an episode of Friends where they mentioned this, and she said, "Oh, I guess you are right." (And then I was perturbed that apparently I'm not even an authoritative voice on the smell of my own pee at my house.) However, I then shared that story here at metafilter in a similar metatalk, and someone informed me that some people have pee that smells funny after eating asparagus, and some people don't. But my mind didn't even ponder that either because it seemed so biologically consistent with my experience and thus obviously universal.
posted by SpacemanStix at 9:03 PM on August 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Alt herpes link (mailing address elided).
posted by jessamyn (retired) at 9:14 PM on August 3, 2015 [3 favorites]


Y'all were very kind to a nervous guest

I have such a difficult time imagining you being nervous about anything but cortex and I were kind to you anyhow because we are nice people and also you are awesome.
posted by jessamyn (retired) at 9:17 PM on August 3, 2015 [5 favorites]


TIL I say "whaaaaaaat?!" a lot. :)

I LOVED all the crazy wooden dowel stories and cemetery stuff, I've wandered around many New Orleans graveyards but had no idea (I had heard many stories about rising water tables and trouble keeping bodies underground) about how they buried people in those crypts.

Super fun, and I could listen to Coldchef do a podcast all damn day.
posted by mathowie (retired) at 9:21 PM on August 3, 2015 [7 favorites]


I'm only about 1/3 in but this is really quite hilarious (and informative). Having lived in Louisiana, I really loved this exchange:

ColdChef, on learning to drive: "We would drive our pirogs in the swamp."
Jessamyn: "I didn't even understand that sentence, say it again?"
posted by radioamy at 9:30 PM on August 3, 2015 [7 favorites]


Need more cemetery/funeral/death Q&A with ColdChef!
posted by radioamy at 9:33 PM on August 3, 2015 [7 favorites]


and if you want to help, like me and also other GREAT CARTOONISTS, there is this Book we're trying to get to funding
posted by The Whelk at 1:04 AM on August 4, 2015


....okay it's actually this
posted by The Whelk at 2:08 AM on August 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


When I die, I want it to be in The Big Easy.

That's why I'm in no hurry to visit.
posted by double block and bleed at 4:54 AM on August 4, 2015


Oooh, I'm so looking forward to listening to this after work today!!

cortex (or anyone else), I've been attempting to give the podcast a star rating, but I'm completely befuddled by the iTunes page on the link above. Know how I can give you the 5 stars you all most certainly deserve?
posted by iamkimiam at 6:07 AM on August 4, 2015


A note about "naming your kid 'Seven'" - wasn't that a Seinfeld joke? I definitely remember George saying something about how he'd decided "Seven" was a good name for a child, and he and Jerry having an argument about it.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 6:20 AM on August 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


You know, I get the impression ColdChef got asked to be on because he's a great guy and super interesting and makes the site and the world a better place. How that's fair to ME?
posted by Chrysostom at 6:29 AM on August 4, 2015 [7 favorites]


ColdChef, I'd really like to exchange postcards.

(Anyone else too. Memail me your snail mail and I'll say Hi!)
posted by DigDoug at 6:49 AM on August 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


I guess this is the moment where I can share, my children watch some Minecraft YouTube series where one of the players sounds EXACTLY, UNCANNILY like Jessamyn, and every time they're watching it my head whips around to find out why Jessamyn is talking about killing creepers.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:18 AM on August 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


Really Cortex? You're annoyed by SEVEN having two vowels? Go learn to count in Finnish. Then you'll learn why Finnish speakers always resort to English when giving directions in Manhattan.
posted by ursus_comiter at 7:46 AM on August 4, 2015 [3 favorites]


A note about "naming your kid 'Seven'" - wasn't that a Seinfeld joke? I definitely remember George saying something about how he'd decided "Seven" was a good name for a child, and he and Jerry having an argument about it.

It was originally a character on "Married ... with Children."
posted by Melismata at 8:15 AM on August 4, 2015


There was definitely a Seinfeld episode though, where George was saying "Seven" would be after Mickey Mantle's number, and made a whistling sound while drawing a seven in the air.
posted by LionIndex at 8:43 AM on August 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yes! LionIndex is right, I remember the Mickey Mantle connection being part of George's argument in favor of the name.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:46 AM on August 4, 2015


Oh, and I also remember George sputtering that the name "Seven" "has cache up the ying-yang!"
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:47 AM on August 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


Vowels? WTF me? Syllables. Alas, my edit window.
posted by ursus_comiter at 8:52 AM on August 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


A bit of the episode in question.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:57 AM on August 4, 2015


Matt was missed but an awesome first guest for mefites standing in!

ColdChef, imagine I'm giving you the finger right now.
posted by ellieBOA at 11:34 AM on August 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


That was a very fun episode! I took the long way home on my bike, and then sat on my couch listening to the rest while the computer kicked my ass at Carcassonne. I wish I loved posting things 'cause I'd send you all loads of stuff. Unfortunately, the post office is my #2 pet peeve errand of all time (#1 is buying gas).

Oh, and I figured out how to give the podcast a star rating (and review), if anybody is interested. First, go to the link (in cortex's first comment, above), then click on 'View in iTunes' (which unfortunately opens up iTunes), then in iTunes, click the 'Ratings and Reviews' tab (next to 'Details), then the 'Write a Review' button and star bar is just under the 'Customer Reviews' heading. Maybe that's intuitive to some, but screwit if I wasn't boggled.
posted by iamkimiam at 2:38 PM on August 4, 2015


That same episode George also throws out Soda as a baby's name. That's what I immediately thought of when Seven was mentioned.
posted by Benway at 3:16 PM on August 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


"ColdChef, I'd really like to exchange postcards."

Heh. Toe tag postcards is a novel idea.
posted by clavdivs at 6:12 PM on August 4, 2015 [4 favorites]


WHAT HO, MODS..AND ALSO…UH...STAND-IN GUY!

So when does Cold Chef start his own podcast anyway? WIll this be like when a supporting actor is so good that he gets his own series deal partway through the first season that he joins a hit show?
posted by wenestvedt at 8:21 PM on August 4, 2015 [6 favorites]


"Long psalm" reminds me of "langsam" which is German for "slowly" which I only know because of the bizarre and wonderful Stimmung by Karlheinz Stockhausen which I've been listening to over and over lately and maybe that's why I forgot how to punctuation

Go ahead and listen to it, it's only like an hour and a half, I'll wait.
posted by moonmilk at 5:52 PM on August 5, 2015


(I did a google image search for "langsam" - as one does - and discovered that the Die Hard movies are called Stirb Langsam in German, and "A Good Day to Die" has the catchphrase (in German) "Father, Son, and HOLY SHIT".)
posted by moonmilk at 5:58 PM on August 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Great podcast! Matt was hardly missed (owie!). Really liked your contributions ColdChef. Would definitely enjoy occasional featuring of other MeFites who the regulars half-know/are on at least meet-up terms with (even if that would inevitably skew North-American No-Cabal).

As ever, no matter how much I refresh The Blue there's still tonnes of stuff discussed which I totally missed. Cheers all!

Stirb Langsam
I can't be the only one whose decades of reading entertainingly terrible Sci-Fi/Fantasy causes them to automatically doublecheck names like this backwards?
posted by comealongpole at 6:16 PM on August 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


That word makes me thing of the Captain in Wozzeck howling "Langsam, Wozzeck, laaaaaaangsam!"
posted by Wolfdog at 6:37 PM on August 5, 2015


I've never seen Wozzeck (I think it's a play? ...an opera?) but when I smash my toe into the furniture I am likely to exclaim "Wozzeck!"
posted by moonmilk at 6:39 PM on August 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oh, man, next time they get together to decide which books are really in the Bible and which are apocrypha, I will campaign to get Now That's What I Call Psalm! in there.
posted by ignignokt at 6:43 PM on August 5, 2015


I opened the transcript.
posted by Pronoiac at 12:13 AM on August 6, 2015


Oh man, there's an XML joke in the weed thread! 2001 was indeed Peak XML, IIRC.

Hey, I'm down with talking to you guys! Also, ColdChef was great! And very southern-sounding, even though that should be a surprise to no one.
posted by ignignokt at 1:28 PM on August 6, 2015 [2 favorites]


Wait, you say ee-ponysterical and meh-fite instead of eh-ponysterical and mee-fite? (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
posted by moonmilk at 7:09 PM on August 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


" ... and someone informed me that some people have pee that smells funny after eating asparagus, and some people don't."

Nearly everyone's* pee smells funny after having consumed asparagus. What isn't universal is the ability to smell the chemicals—the urinary metabolites—that are the source of the funny smell. Detection of the culprit sulfur compounds in the urine is thought to be genetically determined. People without the genetic gift for smelling asparagus pee suffer from Asparagus anosmia, a not-so-horrid fate.

* The amounts of asparagus-induced methanethiol production varies from person to person and some, very rare, people may produce so little of it that it isn't easily detected.
posted by bz at 6:57 PM on August 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


I investigated using the Google Web Speech API to transcribe the podcast. I shouldn't spoil the results; see for yourself.
posted by Pronoiac at 9:58 PM on August 8, 2015 [3 favorites]


"Canobie lake
Test your computer
I don't have a computer
Who is this hahaha
Hahaha"
posted by cortex (staff) at 6:08 AM on August 9, 2015


"Super mario brothers taco las vegas nevada"

I want to go to there.
posted by ignignokt at 6:56 AM on August 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


I investigated using the Google Web Speech API to transcribe the podcast. I shouldn't spoil the results; see for yourself.

Pure poetry. I would very much like to hear this transcript performed. And then feed the performance into back into the API. Rinse, repeat.
posted by rafaella gabriela sarsaparilla at 7:22 PM on August 17, 2015


« Older Looking for a comment about "50 Shades of Grey"   |   AskMe about Scale of Artistic Ability in Children Newer »

You are not logged in, either login or create an account to post comments