Did we really have to delete the Quarter-Life Crisis question? March 2, 2005 9:01 AM   Subscribe

Did we really have to delete the Quarter-Life Crisis question?

I know that in one way it looked like a survey question, but in another way, it was "I am freaking out about this. How did you deal with it?" As such, it was no different from half the advice questions out there. Even though it may not have been the best-worded question AskMe has ever seen, it would have been really helpful to have. Also, if a question is borderline, can we let it stay a little to see if it gets good advice-type answers despite poll-ish wording instead of killing it before it has a chance? That would be totally rad.
posted by dame to Etiquette/Policy at 9:01 AM (59 comments total)

Man, I just spent like 5 minutes wondering where that thread went. I liked it, wasn't worse than the "Is anybody having fun" question in my opinion.
posted by Stan Chin at 9:10 AM on March 2, 2005


Haha, right after I saw the thread had been deleted, I knew there would be a Metatalk thread about it. Thanks for not letting me down, Metafilter.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 9:12 AM on March 2, 2005 [1 favorite]


It said "I'm not really asking a question" and then the poster clicked off almost all the answers as "best", so it seemed to be pushing the boundaries of what Ask MetaFilter was for. At best, it was a badly phrased request for advice.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:15 AM on March 2, 2005


Bad call.
posted by gi_wrighty at 9:17 AM on March 2, 2005


A badly phrased request that it seems most answerers were redeeming. Sometimes people do something useful despite themselves.
posted by dame at 9:20 AM on March 2, 2005


The deletions and thread closings suck. Either this is a place for people to communicate or it's not. I'm no fan of chatfilter, but this is so over-the-top.
posted by yerfatma at 9:20 AM on March 2, 2005


Actually, Matt, if I post a well-worded version of that question, will you let it stand? Because I'm totally willing to give my weekly question to bring it back.
posted by dame at 9:22 AM on March 2, 2005


The person is free to repost it in a more direct way. As it was stated, I had barely any idea what they were looking for on first read.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:23 AM on March 2, 2005


The deletions and thread closings suck. Either this is a place for people to communicate or it's not. I'm no fan of chatfilter, but this is so over-the-top.

I've been traveling since Friday and this is my first thread deletion since, but by all means fuel the hysteria over my rampant deletions.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:25 AM on March 2, 2005


Can that person do that without running into the one-week wall? And does anyone remember who made it? Since it's gone, I've got no idea.
posted by dame at 9:26 AM on March 2, 2005


wasn't worse than the "Is anybody having fun" question

I didn't see that. Link?
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:26 AM on March 2, 2005


Matt I <3 you.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 9:27 AM on March 2, 2005 [1 favorite]


Can that person do that without running into the one-week wall? And does anyone remember who made it? Since it's gone, I've got no idea.

The person can, and I've contacted them personally to tell them they should.

"I'm not really asking a question" really, really, really, really isn't what you should put into an Ask MetaFilter question. Maybe I went too far by deleting it since it kinda sorta was a question, but that really set it off as something I didn't want to encourage.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:32 AM on March 2, 2005


part of the risk of commenting in a post

Ah, the thrilling ennervation of a life of danger! The excitement, the pulse-pounding feeling that every moment could be the last!.
posted by freebird at 9:35 AM on March 2, 2005 [1 favorite]


I think Matt was right, it was a non-question. good call.
posted by matteo at 9:36 AM on March 2, 2005


Thanks, Matt. I don't [heart] you because I'm not a sycophant, but that seems like the best solution, so I respect it (not that you care terribly).

And dfleming, please think about posting again if it goes back up. You know, for the children.
posted by dame at 9:36 AM on March 2, 2005


Perhaps we could cut Matt some slack, yes?

The best defense for leaving the the question alone seems to be something like Sure, it was marginal, but the answers were good. So the rule for Matt should be - wait until a bunch of answers are posted, then decide if they are any good - if not, delete the question and answers? And what does he tell the person asking the deleted question - "No, the question wasn't any worse than question XXX, which was allowed, but your question got bad answers while question XXX got good answers, so I deleted your question"?

Matt has decided to protect the quality of questions. Yes, sometimes he won't get it exactly right, but if he allows marginal questions, they'll just be more of them, and they'll be more and more marginal. And no, it makes no sense for him to wait until answers appear to evaluate the question.
posted by WestCoaster at 9:39 AM on March 2, 2005


I was sad to see it go but then I've never had a tick before so I'm biased.

The deletions and thread closings suck. Either this is a place for people to communicate or it's not. I'm no fan of chatfilter, but this is so over-the-top.

Matt, I'm not one to criticise and on going back to read your explanations for the closing of threads I can see your motivations but even if yerfatma overstates the point, there's something of a valid point there.

Case in point: the recent UN Owen MeTA thread. I read it through and wanted to take a sounding as to whether people disapproved of my two previous in post links to Doctors Without Borders' online donation site. I couldn't but don't consider the issue important enough to open a new MeTa thread about. So, I'm not left with an option. Closing threads in particular I think needs to be evaluated.
posted by dmt at 9:52 AM on March 2, 2005


Case in point: the recent UN Owen MeTA thread.

Oh god. I should have wiped those from the earth, not closed them, but seriously, threads like that (total clusterfucks) are why I had to code the close thread feature in the first place. It's a bummer you didn't get to throw in your two cents, but do you think anyone would have read it, considering there were hundreds comments in front of it where people were attacking each other quite personally?
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:59 AM on March 2, 2005


You use 'rad?' You must live in Brooklyn :)

I would have liked to see the question. Was it deleted from a lot of flags?

By the way, I noticed my ability to flag threads and comments are gone. Have I been crying wolf?
posted by Mean Mr. Bucket at 10:02 AM on March 2, 2005


Nevermind, my flags just returned. If you are previewing a comment, the flags are no longer present.
posted by Mean Mr. Bucket at 10:04 AM on March 2, 2005


Hmm, cut matt some slack. He seems to have laid off with the rampant comment deletions, and AskMe should be for asking questions. but matt next time it would be nice if you checked to see if it generated a good discusion before deleting (I guess).

In general matt, I think it would be better if you did what we did, and post MeTa threads on things that bug you and reiterate your policies, maybe let us talk about borderline cases or something.
posted by delmoi at 10:07 AM on March 2, 2005


I was glad Matt closed that thread. For every single sincere and well intentioned communal comment that you had to make in it, dmt, there were going to be 50 others that were full of insults and speculation about the trainwreck that had unfolded.

I don't think anyone minds in-post links to donation sites, as long as you're not Johnny One Note in posting that and nothing else in the comments.

On preview: agreeing with mathowie.
posted by onlyconnect at 10:08 AM on March 2, 2005


You use 'rad?' You must live in Brooklyn :)

Is there anywhere else worth living, Bucket? [imagine smiley here]
posted by dame at 10:09 AM on March 2, 2005


I think it would be better if you did what we did, and post MeTa threads on things that bug you and reiterate your policies, maybe let us talk about borderline cases or something.

I think I am one of the most accomodating, open, and honest large site administrators out there, but seriously, I have to be able to actually do something some times.

If I brought every little thing on my mind to metatalk so we could have a hand-wringing discussion about it, this place would feel like romper room, wouldn't it? Would anything ever get decided upon? Would anything ever be deleted, like ever? Would I ever be able to take any action ever again to improve the site? It seems that most any decision I make these days involves an equal number of people calling for my death/proclaiming the end of metafilter and that I just made the smartest decision ever/mefi is the best.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 10:17 AM on March 2, 2005


It seems that most any decision I make these days involves an equal number of people calling for my death/proclaiming the end of metafilter and that I just made the smartest decision ever/mefi is the best.

You know, Matt, that's just how doing stuff is. Someone is always going to disagree. And if you do nothing, ever, people will think you're an ass for doing nothing, ever. You seem to do a good job of considering criticism and deciding what is warranted and what isn't, then taking steps based on that. I think you did a really good job in this case, even if I think the first decision (to delete) was a mistake.
posted by dame at 10:28 AM on March 2, 2005


What the fuck? Is "over the top" (1, 2) today's talking point for the Matt bashers?

This is getting tiresome and repetitive. Really, just fucking leave already if you don't like how he runs the place. Better people already have.
posted by mcwetboy at 10:36 AM on March 2, 2005


mcwetboy writes "This is getting tiresome and repetitive. Really, just fucking leave already if you don't like how he runs the place. Better people already have."

Metafilter: Love It or or Leave It, dirty hippie!
posted by orthogonality at 10:43 AM on March 2, 2005


You know Matt, I posted that thank you MeTa thread because I kept seeing your comments about no one appreciating all the work you had done. Now you're also complaining about people praising you. I don't think you really want a bunch of users who don't give a shit about anything, but what exactly do you want? It seems like you too are really just unhappy with everything here right now.
posted by spaghetti at 10:44 AM on March 2, 2005


I think there's still a whole load of people out there who didn't notice the U-turn in the crash_leaves thread, and haven't realised that we're back to business as usual round here with the light-touch vis a vis deletions.
posted by bonaldi at 10:45 AM on March 2, 2005



The deletions and thread closings suck. Either this is a place for people to communicate or it's not. I'm no fan of chatfilter, but this is so over-the-top.

I've been traveling since Friday and this is my first thread deletion since, but by all means fuel the hysteria over my rampant deletions.


yerfatma's comment flatly stated an opinion deletions suck. yerfatma's comment implied in no way, shape or form whatsoever that deletions are rampant or that there exists a hysteria about them.

your response, on the other hand...
posted by quonsar at 10:46 AM on March 2, 2005


It seems like you too are really just unhappy with everything here right now.

BINGO!
posted by quonsar at 10:48 AM on March 2, 2005


wasn't worse than the "Is anybody having fun" question

I didn't see that. Link?


link

And, This One seems similar.

And the Buffy one seems like a poorly veiled attempt to poll everybody about their favorite episode, but I suppose there has to be some slack for chatty questions.
posted by willnot at 10:49 AM on March 2, 2005


yerfatma's comment flatly stated an opinion deletions suck. yerfatma's comment implied in no way, shape or form whatsoever that deletions are rampant or that there exists a hysteria about them.

Do you actually believe that, or are you just trying to be consistent in your idiocy? It was a single deletion, and yerfatma was talking about plural deletions as if they were many. And if you don't think there's been hysteria about deletions around here lately, then you haven't been paying attention.
posted by anapestic at 10:53 AM on March 2, 2005


Is there anywhere else worth living, Bucket?

*scowls from the Queens side of Maspeth Creek*
posted by jonmc at 11:04 AM on March 2, 2005


Now you're also complaining about people praising you. I don't think you really want a bunch of users who don't give a shit about anything, but what exactly do you want? It seems like you too are really just unhappy with everything here right now.

Naw, I'm just saying that I wouldn't find much utility in posting every issue I have in MetaTalk, like everyone else does, and was kind of making a joke about how all those threads might go.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 11:21 AM on March 2, 2005


I think quonsar has community-leader penis envy.
posted by crunchland at 11:26 AM on March 2, 2005


Ah, the thrilling ennervation of a life of danger! The excitement, the pulse-pounding feeling that every moment could be the last!.
posted by freebird


Thank you, freebird, for the belly laugh. I am now picturing all the users typing furiously while wearing seatbelts and helmets.

What? You don't wear a helmet when you post to MetaFilter?! I hope at the very least you are wearing your flame retardent underwear while posting to MetaTalk.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 11:30 AM on March 2, 2005


Thank you, freebird, for the belly laugh. I am now picturing all the users typing furiously while wearing seatbelts and helmets.

....and nothing else. Rowwwr.
posted by jonmc at 11:37 AM on March 2, 2005


I think bonaldi has a good point. The light touch appears to be back, but there appears to be a lot of residual sensitivity to the editing.
posted by caddis at 11:44 AM on March 2, 2005


*puts on helmet, adjusts seatbelt*
posted by Fuzzy Monster at 11:47 AM on March 2, 2005


It's back...
posted by caddis at 11:49 AM on March 2, 2005


Long live quarter-life crises!
posted by driveler at 11:56 AM on March 2, 2005


Stan Chin, willnot -- The problem with the "Is anybody having fun" question was that there wasn't enough information on the front page - that one sentence was all. The inside information made the posting appropriate - there was no problem coming up with on-point answers.

Specifically, [more inside] included this sentence, in addition to background information: I'd like to take part in some hilarious, spontaneous, relaxed, social jubilation in my life. I'd like my two-year-old son to see what it looks like. So where is it?

So, no, this question wasn't a problem in the way that the question that Matt deleted was a problem. For the "Is anybody having fun?" question, there just wasn't the right information in the right place.
posted by WestCoaster at 11:56 AM on March 2, 2005


It's back...

Yay. And this was a very useful Metatalk; you know, it actually made something better. Good for everyone.


*scowls from the Queens side of Maspeth Creek*

Aww, honey, Queens is totally better than the Bronx and Staten Island and Out There, and it's a toss-up between Queens & Manhattan. But with that weirdo street numbering and those vast stretches with shopping centers and that almost-suburban feel, well it just can't compete with borough of churches and families. I still love you though.

posted by dame at 12:09 PM on March 2, 2005


But with that weirdo street numbering and those vast stretches with shopping centers and that almost-suburban feel, well it just can't compete with borough of churches and families.

At least we haven't been gentrified yet. And we still have major league baseball!
posted by jonmc at 12:19 PM on March 2, 2005


Screw major league. We have the minor-league ball on the beach. Also, my borough's cunt is way better than yours.
posted by dame at 12:25 PM on March 2, 2005


Your borough's mama wears army boots. And we have better gyros, beer gardens and Irish bars. And the Ramones were from here.
posted by jonmc at 12:28 PM on March 2, 2005


Meh. The green has always been the place on MeFi where the policing is heaviest, and when you post there you do so knowing this full well - it is impossible to avoid the warnings on that point. That's the way it's supposed to be.

As far as the u.n. owen thread goes, I've said this a few times but I thought the outcome was pretty perfect, although perhaps that second thread should've been closed after veering completely off the topic at hand and resumed being more un owen chat, rather than a broad look at the issue.

Still, the first thread served to permanently brand in the minds of all the users who frequent MeTa that soliciting funds is a bad idea, and closing the thread as it turned into a clusterfuck was good.

The second thread gave us this excellent set of guidelines regarding solicitation, and if for no other reason than that alone it was a useful thread.
posted by Ryvar at 12:34 PM on March 2, 2005



posted by Mean Mr. Bucket at 12:42 PM on March 2, 2005


Do you actually believe that, or are you just trying to be consistent in your idiocy? It was a single deletion, and yerfatma was talking about plural deletions as if they were many.

Well, that is what I meant. I'll admit to generalizing based on my limited recent visits, but it seems like every time I am in here there's a closed thread or someone wondering if some comments got deleted or . . . whatever.

To the man with a new hammer, every thread looks like a nail.
posted by yerfatma at 12:45 PM on March 2, 2005




not as spunky a sign, I realize
posted by jonmc at 12:48 PM on March 2, 2005


"not as spunky a sign, I realize"

I wouldn't count on it.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 1:56 PM on March 2, 2005



posted by yerfatma at 2:43 PM on March 2, 2005


inconsistent idiocy is the hobgoblin of community-leader penis enviers.
posted by quonsar at 2:46 PM on March 2, 2005


And the Buffy one seems like a poorly veiled attempt to poll everybody about their favorite episode, but I suppose there has to be some slack for chatty questions.

Boy, I entirely disagree. The questioner has a very specific goal and would like advice for meeting it. People are doing a fine job of tailoring their responses to that goal, and not chatting a lot about how they loved this or that moment.
posted by redfoxtail at 4:11 PM on March 2, 2005


for what it's worth, one of the reasons that I personally decided to join MeFi was that it seemed like the community had a more-than-decent say in the policies of the place, but that the power to change/delete and all that rested in the hands of one person who seemed pretty open-minded and fair.

Like, the un owen and y2karl threads, as insane as those got, it was comforting knowing that somebody could come along and go "Holy Shit! What are you monkeys doing?!" then close the thread. that simple.

fwiw
posted by shmegegge at 6:04 PM on March 2, 2005



posted by wendell at 8:47 PM on March 2, 2005


Matt, you goat-fucker, I hate you, stop deleting everything or I'll totally set fire to your first-born.
posted by Dreamghost at 4:36 PM on March 3, 2005


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