May 5, 2005

1:05 PM

I just wanted to say that it's somewhat refreshing to see a thread about women's issues without any useless "yuck!" comments from the XY crowd. Thought it'd be good to say something nice for a change.

I almost posted this in the thread, which would have been deliciously ironic.
posted by RikiTikiTavi to etiquette/policy at 1:05 PM (153 comments total)

silly mongoose.
posted by quonsar at 1:07 PM on May 5, 2005

I was going to comment in that thread, but I can't use tampons properly myself. Mine always come out brown!
posted by Mayor Curley at 1:24 PM on May 5, 2005

Was this thread created as a venue for the aforementioned useless XY "yuck!" comments that might otherwise migrate into the green?

For the record, I hope not.

On preview, though, I fear the worst.
posted by breezeway at 1:25 PM on May 5, 2005

Yep. I give RTT the benefit of the doubt, but I was just waiting to see who the first non-bleeder would be to jump in with some yuckage.
posted by rainbaby at 1:30 PM on May 5, 2005

Well look at it from the XY point of view. I kind of got past AskMe without my curiosity getting the better of me, and I try to be good. Then I come to the Gray and there is this thread. I read, "it's somewhat refreshing" and my curiosity is piqued. I just pop over for a moment... just for a moment, mind you, and all can manage to think of to say is:

Yuck.

Sorry 'bout that.
posted by Doohickie at 1:34 PM on May 5, 2005

No you're not. You think it's clever or funny or you wouldn't have hit post.
posted by CunningLinguist at 1:57 PM on May 5, 2005

You're welcome.
posted by jonmc at 2:03 PM on May 5, 2005

I for one welcome our new Tampon blahblahblah...

I'm always glad my gf still bleeds, means there is no young'n on the way.
posted by schyler523 at 2:04 PM on May 5, 2005

sorry i am late to this thread but i was adjusting my tampon :(
posted by naxosaxur at 2:11 PM on May 5, 2005

It would have been so much more refreshing if no one had started a thread about it to give the XY contingent the opportunity to show off what idiots they are.
posted by anapestic at 2:12 PM on May 5, 2005

I should have added that my gf is also relieved...

anapestic: I'm sorry i'm such an idiot.
posted by schyler523 at 2:17 PM on May 5, 2005

It would have been so much more refreshing if no one had started a thread about it to give the XY contingent the opportunity to show off what idiots they are.

There are wimminfolks on the Internets? Gimme back my Boyzone!

</idiot>
posted by DaShiv at 2:19 PM on May 5, 2005

Yep. I give RTT the benefit of the doubt

Nice to know somebody does. No, I'm afraid I didn't think of the "this thread is where the yuckiness goes" angle. Personally, I don't really care who says what in what thread; but it seemed especially civilized and it seems that we tend to punish more than praise at times. *shrug*
posted by RikiTikiTavi at 2:24 PM on May 5, 2005

I was glad it didn't degenerate, either, actually, and surprised. This, no so much surprising (but then again I don't really care about the YUCK contingent, I'm just glad they left my thread alone. They can have this one.)
posted by tristeza at 2:29 PM on May 5, 2005

I just never thought of the topic as icky or yucky to begin with, but i certainly didn't have anything constructive to add to the ask.me thread so i stayed away. After a read through, i noticed that the only deviation from answering the question was the pill derail...
posted by schyler523 at 2:35 PM on May 5, 2005

I'm kind of curious about this. I've only lived with two guys (both very long term) plus my father, but none of them were ever yucked out by this thing, or ever embarrassed at all to buy tampons, etc.

Is it really so typical for guys to freak about this?

(*kisses schyler*)
posted by taz at 2:39 PM on May 5, 2005

I'm just glad they left my thread alone. They can have this one.

Damn, I wish you hadn't said that. See, until you did, we were all behaving ourselves. AskMe was doing its job, addressing the concerns of a diverse community and people were respecting the green.

But now? You crap on the very contingent of people who decided, each individually, to respect your thread. Seriously, bad call tristeza.
posted by felix betachat at 2:40 PM on May 5, 2005

Doohickie, you're married with a college aged kid, and you still think periods are gross? Wow. Five Fresh Fish dropped in at the end to highlight his own personal faves from the thread, but yeah, other than that it was nice to see! taz, I too am curious about why guys (especially non-teenage guys) are so grossed out by it.
posted by fionab at 2:41 PM on May 5, 2005

taz: "Is it really so typical for guys to freak about this?"

Well, it's typical for boorish guys who want to assert their superiority to call other people's private stuff 'gross.' And it's sort of typical for angry girls who want to assert their superiority to accuse guys of always saying 'yuck' about periods.

My girlfriend, she loves her sacred period. It makes her very happy. I wish I could have a couple days of bleeding and headaches every month; that would connect me to the universe.

*ducks*
posted by koeselitz at 2:51 PM on May 5, 2005

But now? You crap on the very contingent of people who decided, each individually, to respect your thread. Seriously, bad call tristeza.

Dude, easy. I didn't mean it in that way and I'm sorry you heard it thus - I was THANKING them for not crapping on my thread by individually deciding not to do so. I appreciate it, and said as much. AND it was in MeTa, not AskMe. What's bad? Please note that several snarky comments were made here before I said anything, so did I really make a difference? I really don't get whey you're up in arms.

(As I said, it doesn't even bother me when people say YUCK, I just said I'm happy they didn't do it in my thread)
posted by tristeza at 2:57 PM on May 5, 2005

I too am curious about why guys (especially non-teenage guys) are so grossed out by it.

I've got no good explanations for guys being skeeved purely by the blood or by soiled pads. But very used tampons are unpleasant to me because they look like meat. They're marbled pink to deep red and they glisten. Maybe it's just one particular brand or something about my SO's postures or structure, but they also seem to have a seam that turns deep red and this is the side that floats above the water in the toilet. And that looks like a backbone.

So if I see the used tampon it is usually because we are changing/toiletting together because we are travelling, and then it looks like my future wife is pulling a skinned mouse from the place that our children will exit from. Even more rarely, I find one in the toilet, and then it looks like mobsters are sending me a minor threatening message. Like "Please return that book you borrowed from Don Vito or you will possibly end up like this mouse-- if months pass and we think about your debt when we are not busy."
posted by Mayor Curley at 2:57 PM on May 5, 2005

I'm not angry, I'm just PMSing. Just kidding :-)
posted by fionab at 2:59 PM on May 5, 2005

Mayor Curley: LOL...

On that note:
Did anyone see the south park where cartman found a used tampon in stan's bathroom, and walks around saying, "You shouldna done that he's just a boy" in a creepy accent for the rest of the episode. My gf and i laugh so hard at that one...

(*hugs taz*)
posted by schyler523 at 3:06 PM on May 5, 2005

Lol Mayor Curley...I never looked at it quite like that before...but now you mention it...!!!

(Yah, I'm female)
posted by ramix at 3:09 PM on May 5, 2005

guys, what the hell is the problem with women's periods? I'd almost post an AskMeFi question, seriously -- why so many men (at least as a lot of women friends report to me) are grossed out and refuse sex during periods? why? unless the bleeding is just too intense, if both partners feel like having sex, why have a little blood stop you? really? is it an American thing? in the age of running water and washing machines and nice fluffy towels it shouldn't be a problem. I'm genuinely curious
posted by matteo at 3:11 PM on May 5, 2005

What this post needs is someone to explain UCB's "red wings", and quick.
posted by AlexReynolds at 3:13 PM on May 5, 2005

heh! Well, I guess I have to admit that most of the men in my life haven't had so much tampon face-time as you describe, MC!

on preview: "refuse sex during periods"? Hah!! Ha!

really?
posted by taz at 3:14 PM on May 5, 2005

why so many men (at least as a lot of women friends report to me) are grossed out and refuse sex during periods? why? unless the bleeding is just too intense, if both partners feel like having sex, why have a little blood stop you? really?

Because it says not to do it in Leviticus, Euro-commie.
posted by Mayor Curley at 3:17 PM on May 5, 2005

tristeza: you have a funny way of thanking people. I'm just pointing out that it's bad form to meet courtesy with snark. It's your choice, obviously, but it probably makes it less likely that you'll enjoy the same consideration the next time around.
posted by felix betachat at 3:18 PM on May 5, 2005

matteo - lots of women are still grossed out by menstruating, so it's hardly a surprise that many men find it mysterious and vaguely disgusting.
posted by raedyn at 3:24 PM on May 5, 2005

it probably makes it less likely that you'll enjoy the same consideration the next time around. - felix betachat

The consideration isn't just for tristeza. It's for everyone in the conversation.

I was also happy to see the thread with no "eww" comments, but I didn't think it was so remarkable as to warrant a new thread. I just appreciated that the people interested in the topic or with something useful to say contributed and everyone else stayed away or kept their mouth shut. Too bad this lesson hasn't yet been transferred to the blue.
posted by raedyn at 3:27 PM on May 5, 2005

tristeza: you have a funny way of thanking people. I'm just pointing out that it's bad form to meet courtesy with snark. It's your choice, obviously, but it probably makes it less likely that you'll enjoy the same consideration the next time around.

Felix betachat, it's not a "courtesy" that someone decided NOT to dump on my thread. It's, like, the way it's supposed to be, and threatening that I may not enojy this "consideration" again because I didn't thank everyone properly for being kind enought NOT to dump on it in the first place is silly. People shouldn't have to be thanked for NOT being jarheads.
posted by tristeza at 3:29 PM on May 5, 2005

"refuse sex during periods"?

Never!
posted by schyler523 at 3:29 PM on May 5, 2005

*kisses schyler once again; this time more passionately*
posted by taz at 3:30 PM on May 5, 2005

Mmmm.....tampons.
posted by forrest at 3:32 PM on May 5, 2005

Because it says not to do it in Leviticus

*is instantly turned into pillar of Euro-commie government-issue fixed-price salt*
posted by matteo at 3:35 PM on May 5, 2005

" is it an American thing?"

Obviously, since there's no record of cultural squeamishness regarding menstruation outside of the US, right?

As an anti-sexist, feminist, sex-positive male, I'm as pro-menstruation as most anyone. But, c'mon, it's blood(y). It's not an absurd idea that perhaps there's some innate aversion involved. And, per the prior paragraph, cultural stigmatization of menstruation is close to universal (sadly). But biology isn't and shouldn't be destiny so don't think for a moment that I'm endorsing such attitudes.

One of my hobby-horses is the cultural redefinition of semen from something "nasty" to something joyful and, correspondingly, from something that's understood to commonly be a tool of degradation to something that is a celebrated aspect of male sexuality. Similarly, I feel the same way about female sexual fluids, by which I really mean vaginal lubricant secretions and ejaculate. Obviously, though, the same principles should apply as well to menstruation and in general I do promote this. Personally, though, I'm still a abit squeamish about it in the context of sex (but not otherwise).

I know a lot of men who are/have been in either non-marital long-term relationships or marriages and are effectively positive about menstruation or at least much less squeamish than is the average American male. I think those of us for whom this is true could do a bit more than we generally do to subvert the cultural norm by speaking up, casually and forthrightly, in ways that combat the stigmatization of menstruation. Because the male, "Oh, yuck!" response is far too common.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 3:37 PM on May 5, 2005

Uh-oh.
posted by grouse at 3:38 PM on May 5, 2005

I'm pretty sure I'm a non-deodorized, oh-so salty bit of Euro-commie, too, if I would ever bother to pay enough attention to bleeding politics.

(little joke in there)

hope forrest isn't expecting a kiss.
posted by taz at 3:41 PM on May 5, 2005

I've got no good explanations for guys being skeeved purely by the blood or by soiled pads.

For men, there's no context in which blood leaving their body is a normal part of its regular function. Most men don't faint at the sight of it, but other than having blood taken for a test, seeing it usually means something is wrong (even if it's minor). I think it's understandable that some men have to consciously get past that negative association. It's not necessarily just "being grossed out".

why so many men (at least as a lot of women friends report to me) are grossed out and refuse sex during periods?

Just to belabor the point, if you were having anal sex and your penis came out covered in blood, it would mean something very different. That case is closer to most men's *personal* experience with the presence of blood (it's an indicator of damage) than the harmless case of menstrual blood. Obviously, you can get over it, but it might require more effort for some men than others.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 3:41 PM on May 5, 2005

One of my hobby-horses is the cultural redefinition of semen from something "nasty" to something joyful and, correspondingly, from something that's understood to commonly be a tool of degradation to something that is a celebrated aspect of male sexuality.

There's a reason that semen is considered "nasty": it causes everything from chlamydia to pregnancy. It wastes tissues and soils computer keyboards. And it smells like those unpleasant trees in the late spring.
posted by Mayor Curley at 3:43 PM on May 5, 2005

Of course it's gross... it's cotton (or something) saturated with blood. This is not an attractive sight no matter how you look at it. Used bandages and tissues fall into the same category.

That said, it's silly to get worked up about it if your a guy... I mean, unless your girlfriend/wife is a total slob, it isn't as though they're dangling from the shower rod or being used for decorative purposes.

It's been my experience that many women feel pretty much the same way about the whole thing. Anyway, consider the alternative. If you think tampons are disgusting you oughtta try projectile vomiting or diapers after yummy meal of creamed corn and peanuts.
posted by cedar at 3:45 PM on May 5, 2005

since there's no record of cultural squeamishness regarding menstruation outside of the US, right?

I don't know, that's why I asked the question. but I'm sure you can fire off a few tight, feminist, sex-friendly, semen-embracing paragraphs about that, too

if you were having anal sex and your penis came out covered in blood, it would mean something very different.

well, the usual substance that's on it, that famous Santorum molecule, is quite more unpleasant to me than simple blood would be. not that I'd cherish rectal bleeding in a partner, of course, hope you get the mixed metaphor
posted by matteo at 3:46 PM on May 5, 2005

Anyone refusing sex during Aunt Flo's visit is missin' out big time...i find that my gf is even more passionate due to some sort of hormone combo. Lay a reddish towel down (or do it in the shower)...

it isn't as though they're dangling from the shower rod or being used for decorative purposes.

Umm...side note, but there was an artist that collected used tampons and glued them into some sort of shape and voila...instant shock art (i can understand being repulsed by "old" used tampons used for art's sake.)
posted by schyler523 at 3:51 PM on May 5, 2005

This is the weirdest MeTa thread I've seen in a while.

felix betachat: Lay off tristeza. You're the only one who thinks she was being snarky.
posted by languagehat at 3:55 PM on May 5, 2005

on a towel, I say, and really there's usually almost no sign afterwards.

You guys who are turning down sex during menstruation?

You obviously get way too much sex. Time to start cutting down on all the sex.
posted by taz at 4:02 PM on May 5, 2005

well, the usual substance that's on it, that famous Santorum molecule, is quite more unpleasant to me than simple blood would be.

it's not really simple blood; it's blood and bits of tissue and uterine lining and often quite pungent (not nasty smelling, exactly, but, sort of thick, intense-). We've had this discussion around here before, but I really think it's silly to consider a preference not to have bloody sex as some kind of anti-woman stance. I don't particularly like to have sex when I'm bleeding; I tend to feel kind of nauseated and often depressive at the time anyway, so it really doesn't seem that appealing. On light days it's not a big deal, but some of us (read that thread, for instance) are dealing with more than just a tinge of red. Yeah, it's not as gross as shit, but I'd say it's about equivalent to pee - not that big a deal, but not exactly desireable. In general, I'd rather not involve pee in sex. I don't really think I'm missing out.
posted by mdn at 4:18 PM on May 5, 2005

People shouldn't have to be thanked for NOT being jarheads.
Yet you did it anyway. But yeah, felix betachat: let it go.

I don't know why men (and women, but perhaps not to the same extent) are squeamish about menstruation and its by-products, but suspect that it is still one of those things that is not considered suitable conversation material in polite society and something that we all like to pretend doesn't happen, kind of like your parents having sex.

Why are people put off having sex during menstruation? If nothing else, it is a (relatively) safe period with regard to unwanted pregnancies.
posted by dg at 4:20 PM on May 5, 2005

it's silly to consider a preference not to have bloody sex as some kind of anti-woman stance.

nobody said that. I just find it peculiar, and I see I am not the only one. but to each her and his own
posted by matteo at 4:22 PM on May 5, 2005

Sex and blood and rock'n'roll... ;-P
posted by mischief at 4:23 PM on May 5, 2005

oh, I probably blame monotheism and all the "uncleanliness"-related Bronze Age crap. as I said above, we all have running hot water now (except quonsar)
posted by matteo at 4:24 PM on May 5, 2005

monotheism and all the "uncleanliness"-related Bronze Age crap

Iron Age, technically.

*goes to his room*
posted by felix betachat at 4:27 PM on May 5, 2005

no wait -- why Iron Age? Jewish history begins during the Bronze age in the Middle East, doesn't it?
posted by matteo at 4:31 PM on May 5, 2005

Matteo, you're so full of shit. Offhand, I can name at least four pre-industrial indigenous cultures that have menstruation taboos at least as extreme as found in the semitic religions. Varieties of Buddhism and Hinduism, too, have menstruation taboos and sequestration. Cultural squeamishness about menstruation is well-nigh universal and to blame this misogyny on monotheism, particularly judeo-christianity, is an astonishing display of smug, ignorant bigotry. For someone so evidently intelligent and erudite, your allegiance to certain ideologies results in unthinking habits of thought that are almost lobotomized.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 4:49 PM on May 5, 2005

"silly mongoose."

That reference deserves an explicit recognition.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 4:51 PM on May 5, 2005

Jewish history begins during the Bronze age in the Middle East, doesn't it?

Nope!. warning: .pdf, technical
posted by felix betachat at 4:55 PM on May 5, 2005

Bloody Hell.
posted by jonmc at 4:58 PM on May 5, 2005

For someone so evidently intelligent and erudite, your allegiance to certain ideologies results in unthinking habits of thought that are almost lobotomized.

oh I'm sorry I seem to have stumbled into the "how to increase your vocabulary" thread when what I wanted to talk about was bloody anal sex....
posted by jessamyn at 5:00 PM on May 5, 2005

*invites jessamyn up to his room*
posted by felix betachat at 5:02 PM on May 5, 2005

[close thread]

Please make it go away. This will not end well.
posted by naxosaxur at 5:02 PM on May 5, 2005

*gets popcorn and comfy chair, waits for the main show to start*
posted by dg at 5:10 PM on May 5, 2005

Y'know, I suppose that technically I'm responsible for all this "hands off the girl topics," thing, but, truth be told even I'm kind of surprised at people who're grossed out by the whole period thing.

Granted, I think the people make it out to be some kind of mystical goddess event are stupid, but come on. Yeah, the first time around it's strange because there's no corresponding reference point in male life, but after 2 sisters, a couple long term girlfriends, and a job cleaning restrooms (this is where I learned women are just as big pigs as men. Ladies, please don't stick your used maxi pads to the stall door. janitors everywhere will thank you), it all becomes old hat. And if you get comfortable with her girl stuff, she'll be far more amenable to you sitting on the couch in your underwear passing gas.

See how that works.
posted by jonmc at 5:10 PM on May 5, 2005

[close thread]

O Gaia, don't stop! I'm about to celebrate an aspect of my male sexuality by entering the involuntary ejaculatory phase!
posted by Armitage Shanks at 5:13 PM on May 5, 2005

The Kleenex family thanks you.
posted by jonmc at 5:17 PM on May 5, 2005

And if you get comfortable with her girl stuff, she'll be far more amenable to you sitting on the couch in your underwear passing gas.

Ewww... this thread is gross.
posted by AlexReynolds at 5:23 PM on May 5, 2005

As a side note, all first-aid kits should have some tampons in them.
posted by spaghetti at 5:25 PM on May 5, 2005

you're so full of shit

no EB, this is the menstrual blood thread, the anal sex thread is in the Blue, the dios/Coulter one. wrong way -- you probably feel asleep in front of the screen re-reading one of your comments. no biggie -- the Hindu gods know that it happens to me, too, whenever I read you (which is not often, the boredom is just overwhelming).

you see EB, the problem with us in the West (as opposed to those who live either far from the West or, like you, in their own labyryntine paragraphs) is that as of now -- until migration patterns finally and happily fuck our shit up -- our culture tends to be more heavily influenced by monotheism than, say, Hinduism. hence, people have been more often raised by Christians, or Jews, than have been raised by the followers of pre-industrial indigenous cultures. that's us -- whether this is the case in Blighland, too, I don't really want to know.


unthinking habits of thought that are almost lobotomized

I'm the first to admit my English is very clumsy but my Italian is at least readable -- do you write like this in your native language, too?
posted by matteo at 5:27 PM on May 5, 2005

Ewww... this thread is gross.

What, you run outside to fart or something? Next, you'll tell me you get out of the shower to pee.
posted by jonmc at 5:29 PM on May 5, 2005

Next, you'll tell me you get out of the shower to pee.

Well, at least you didn't say bathtub.
posted by AlexReynolds at 5:34 PM on May 5, 2005

-matteo wins by a chasm-
posted by naxosaxur at 5:36 PM on May 5, 2005

Metafilter: You probably fell asleep in front of the screen re-reading one of your comments. No biggie.
posted by AlexReynolds at 5:37 PM on May 5, 2005

Oh, come now, alex, being a slob is one of life's great pleasures. And since I'm in a lasting relationship, I'm free to indulge in it fully. Don't rain fastidiously on my slovenly parade. My god, some TV executive is going to read that and cast us in a remake of The Odd Couple. Oh well, dhoyt can play Murray the Cop if he wants.

and matteo: the key to reading EB's comments is to simply wait for the movie.

I kid because I love...
posted by jonmc at 5:41 PM on May 5, 2005

heh.

EB, I'm sorry, but trying to attack Matteo on matters sensical is probably not a good idea. Pick another target.
posted by taz at 5:53 PM on May 5, 2005

the key to reading EB's comments is to simply wait for the movie.

Unthinking Habits of Thought That Are Almost Lobotomized, starring... Woody Allen! Jeff Goldblum! Vanessa Redgrave! And in the role of Ethereal Bligh: Wallace Shawn! Coming soon to a thirty-seat theater near you!

"Phlegmatic!" -- The New York Times
"Enigmatic!" -- The New Yorker
"Fantastic!" -- David Manning
"Dem picks Gephardt as VP candidate!" -- New York Daily News

Why wait for the lobotomy? See it today!
posted by languagehat at 5:58 PM on May 5, 2005

I'm kind of curious about this. I've only lived with two guys (both very long term) plus my father, but none of them were ever yucked out by this thing, or ever embarrassed at all to buy tampons, etc.

I never especially minded buying tampons back in the days when I was married. It's not like anyone thought they were for me. About a month ago, in the middle of freaking tax season, my sixteen-year-old daughter knocked on my door after midnight to tell me that she had run out, and I had to go find a 24-hour drug store (and I live in the deep, deep 'burbs), and I was kind of peeved at her lack of foresight, but, again, if you're walking bleary-eyed into a drug store at 1 am on a Sunday night/Monday morning, embarrassment is the last thing on your mind.

OTOH, when my ex was pregnant with my oldest daughter (the one who forgets to plan ahead), I had to walk into a drugstore and pick up six extra large bottles of extra strength Tums, and the checkout person looked at me as if to say "dude, you need a less stressful job," and all I wanted to do was shout "They're not for me!"

None of which is terribly relevant, but this thread was never anything to write home about anyway.
posted by anapestic at 6:11 PM on May 5, 2005

I had to walk into a drugstore and pick up six extra large bottles of extra strength Tums, and the checkout person looked at me as if to say "dude, you need a less stressful job,"

I had a similar experience. I used to work in a computer store in a strip mall that also contained a gas station/mini mart. I'd periodically go on a smoke run. My boss favored chewing tobacco, so he'd ask me to pick him up some. So I'd go in and ask for a pack of Camel Lights and a tin of Copenhagen. The guy behind the counter probably thought I was the most unhealthy being in the universe.
posted by jonmc at 6:15 PM on May 5, 2005

taz, matteo, I echo what koeselitz said about the boorish guys. Personally, in many many situations where I've been in a mixed-sex group of friends and some "female topic" has come up, it's really rare for a guy to actually be squicked by the discussion (actually I can't remember any examples of it happening at all but I'm sure there's been one or two). But almost every time, one of the girls says, "Oh, we shouldn't be talking about this, we'll gross out all the boys." and there are nods all 'round. Even for really innocuous topics like having trouble finding a bra that fits.

I can only theorize that either (1) the people I hang out with are unusually mature and worldwise (snicker...), or (2) the girls haven't noticed that we're not all easily-embarrassed junior-high-schoolers any more.

I think cedar's analogy of used tampons to used bandages is good. I mean, they're icky, I don't want them lying around on the dinner table, but they're not THAT icky.
posted by hattifattener at 6:16 PM on May 5, 2005

"...but trying to attack Matteo on matters sensical is probably not a good idea."

What is "sensical" about the implicit assertion that misogynist menstruation taboos are mostly exclusive to semitic monotheism (well, hell, not just that, but matteo first implied that it was exclusively an American thing)? That's not sensical, it's egregiously ignorant. Matteo commits this sort of error all the time. Despite his obvious intelligence and erudition (Oh my God:"erudition"! It's an unusual word!), his worldview is almost cartoonish and he's a manifestly lazy thinker. If he were just an ordinary dumbshit, he'd deserve pity. But he's not a dumbshit, he's worse.

Christ. "...monotheism and all the 'uncleanliness'-related Bronze Age crap" That is easily the stupidest thing I've read all week. It has a sheen of knowledge: mentioning "monotheism" and the "Bronze Age", as if matteo actually knows what he's talking about. But menstrution taboos, even uncleanliness menstruation taboos, are found in most religions and are found througout known human history. Matteo couldn't be more wrong—and he could barely be more smug in his assumed rightness. Personally, I can hardly imagine a circumstance more embarassing. I keep hoping that matteo and his ilk will wake up one day and subsequently be literally mortified by embarassment. Sadly, this hasn't yet happened.

Now I return you to your regularly-scheduled MeTa wankfest.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 6:26 PM on May 5, 2005

oh, go bleed from your pussy, eeb.
posted by quonsar at 8:27 PM on May 5, 2005

girls, girls, you're both pretty.
posted by jonmc at 8:27 PM on May 5, 2005

you too, q.
posted by jonmc at 8:28 PM on May 5, 2005

*preens*
posted by quonsar at 8:48 PM on May 5, 2005

Personally, I can hardly imagine a circumstance more embarrassing.

So, I'm thinking you have never walked into a convenience store at 2am, hungover, with mascara and "I'm a slut" painted in lipstick on your forehead. You have probably never had your child wander over to the next table, grab some nice ladies lobster and run around the restaurant trying to grab people with the claws?

I'm pretty sure you have never had a tampon head south while you were in the middle of a presentation, so pumped up that you failed to notice your slacks were soaked through with menstrum the entire time (me neither, but, boy, I felt for her). I expect you have never shit yourself in public, said something you wished hadn't been overhead or vomited out of fear in a courtroom.

Dude, if this kind of trifling masturbatory intellectual babble is something you find embarrassing, you really need to get out more. I can humiliate myself far worse buying coffee in the morning than with anything I could ever say on a web site. You must take great comfort in a cerebral life, a life where a poorly phrased bon mot or an intellectual faux paux is of more importance than indignities to your physical person or, you know... something that might actually matter.

God, talk about wankfests.

You impotent, condescending, arrogant, quasi-intellectual poseur. When your girl needs tampons in the middle of the night, I bet you make her sit through a twenty minute lecture about how enlightened you are before you'll put down whatever incoherent pop-psych piece of crap your reading and actually DO something.
posted by cedar at 8:54 PM on May 5, 2005

EB, are you less smug? On preview, very very well said, cedar. Kisses from afar. And can you pick me up a pack of super tampons on your way home? Thanks, I'm out, and EB just keeps telling me it's not the bronze age, it's the iron age, and it's not the semitic monothesism, it's the menstruation! All I wanted was some tampons! He makes this sort of error all the time :-)
posted by fionab at 8:58 PM on May 5, 2005

*claps cedar*

*claps some more*
posted by dg at 9:00 PM on May 5, 2005

um, quonsar isn't pretty at all. He's ugly and old and nobody should have to ever look at him ever.

Anybody who gets upset about menstruation needs to watch a real live childbirth. Get some perspective.
posted by nixerman at 9:05 PM on May 5, 2005

Oh man, EB, seriously you crack me up to no end. I had an awful, awful day and you somehow just made me smile. I'd say thank you, but it would probably be the stupidest thing you've read all week.
posted by fionab at 9:06 PM on May 5, 2005

There is a certain point beyond which masturbation becomes art--a concise, penetrating statement of the human condition. Taken in this light EB's posts are beautiful. I say keep up the good work.
posted by nixerman at 9:12 PM on May 5, 2005

I think that would be sublime at this point, nixerman.
posted by barnone at 9:36 PM on May 5, 2005

You guys need to learn the zen of not posting. I didn't post in that thread because I had nothing to say. If half of the comments on this site didn't get posted, it probably would result in a net positive change. I almost didn't post this, but that would've defeated the purpose.
posted by ludwig_van at 9:43 PM on May 5, 2005

I tried so hard to not post this either. But then you went and posted that. So i had to. By you commenting on how we need to restrain ourselves from commenting motivated me to comment.

Until now, I was just enjoying watching the Hierophant of Wankery spout his frothy opinions onto the grey.
posted by exlotuseater at 10:00 PM on May 5, 2005

In my experience, those taboos have only recently dissolved with the generations near mine (I'm 25.) and I attribute it to the nature of this generation's humor.

Once upon a time it wasn't ok to talk about menstruation, etc... at all, and so it was a guilty pleasure to tell a dirty joke or two among guy friends and keep it between you.

Enter blue comics. People like Lenny Bruce brought that type of humor to the out-loud. It was happening long before LB got famous, but it was his fame and subsequent martyrdom that made it an open topic for discussion.

They gave us the ability to laugh at what makes us uncomfortable because they did it in a venue designed for laughing where the only thing keeping you uncomfortable was your own desire to face that discomfort. If you didn't like it, you got up and left.

Decades later, and that stuff is old news. We keep pushing, but we also keep reusing those old topics for jokes, until finally it's not funny any more because it's old hat. Who wants to hear the dirty jokes from 60 years ago? (although I still love this one: What's the difference between a rose and an enema? The rose goes in your button hole.) We've become desensitized to it, by my generation. Now we move onto other topics, but mainly the butt of the joke becomes discomfort itself. We're so painfully aware, by now, of the role humor plays in giving the lie to our shame and discomfort that our best comedians and comedy writers make fun of shame and discomfort directly. Take South Park. Episode after Episode 4 little boys who are routinely criticised by the older generations for being lewd, vulgar, etc... act as the straight men for a community of adults acting absurdly because of their fear, shame and discomfort. See also: Family Guy, Simpsons, Aqua Teen Hunger Force et al.

We'll always have things to be uncomfortable about, things that make us nervous and therefore make us laugh. But gradually, especially with our younger generations, bodily functions are leaving that area and heading out to pasture along with humour about manners and slipping on banana peels.

Of course, the women of these generations still have to deal with an entire society geared toward making them feel bad about themselves so that they shop to compensate. So it's no wonder if the ladies THINK that we're more uncomfortable with their bodies than we are. More than once I've had women who sought to put me off my guard in social situations by asking me things like "what do you think about [periods/breast sag/etc]?" and are surprised when no one in the room gets weird and uncomfortable.
posted by shmegegge at 10:05 PM on May 5, 2005

oh God, I just realized. We're past that topic, now, aren't we? Should I have posted something negative about EB, instead?

How dare you take issue with something someone else said?! We don't do that here, asshole!

[/compliance]
posted by shmegegge at 10:14 PM on May 5, 2005

EB?
posted by homunculus at 10:49 PM on May 5, 2005

Well, that was amusing.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 12:11 AM on May 6, 2005

posted by Witty at 12:50 AM on May 6, 2005

All the folks supporting menses seem to be ignoring the possibility of personal preference being involved in like or dislike of menses. Apparently, if you dislike menses, it's because of some sort of cultural background.

I was never bothered by menses until dating. After all, as everyone points out, it's just blood. No big deal.
Then, through the magic of dating, I learned: it's thick blood. And, most importantly, it smells. The concept of menses is fine, but the reality is not quite so fine. So now I have an aversion to menses, and it certainly can't be blamed on my cultural background or personal upbringing.
posted by bugbread at 1:42 AM on May 6, 2005

you only say that because, unlike everybody else here, you weren't raised by worshipers of some strange, animistic Sub-Saharian Africa cult.


anyway, nixerman makes an interesting point about childbirth. frankly, I blame the absurd Western taboo against sex during childbirth to monotheistic, Bronze Age religion. I somehow blame EB, too.
posted by matteo at 2:10 AM on May 6, 2005

*shows up late*

Heard someone's passing out kisses to the red wing flyers in here?

*bats lashes at taz*

EB, your Victorian prose in praise of sexual discharge gave me wood, bro. Do you wear a corset when you write? I've got just the Yahoo group for you. ;^)
posted by squirrel at 2:32 AM on May 6, 2005

BTW, the brown wing thread's over here.
posted by squirrel at 2:45 AM on May 6, 2005

Weird. I'm happy to talk about anything, but even the idea of buying tampons from a shop makes me blush. I'd find the experience of buying them deeply uncomfortable. I know that's wrong, but that's what would happen. I don't think that makes me boorish. Maybe odd, but not boorish.

Slightly off-topic, but I'm shocked by the lack of euphemisms in this thread. Whatever happened to "up on the blocks", "auntie flo", "painters in", etc.
posted by seanyboy at 3:21 AM on May 6, 2005

I buzzed through the thread and felt shabby treading in sacred space. I have zero problems with anything whatsoever to do with the subject or reality. I love grrl things. Grrls rock.
posted by peacay at 4:34 AM on May 6, 2005

And can you pick me up a pack of super tampons on your way home?

Super Tampons? Those are the ones that fight crime, right?
posted by jonmc at 6:47 AM on May 6, 2005

No, but they can clean up oil spills.
posted by kamikazegopher at 6:54 AM on May 6, 2005

wow, matteo, those bronze age links are something else.

I'm no bible scholar, and certainly not a talmudic scholar nor any kind of scholar related to judaism, but I'm not sure those links are all that good.

The first one just says " Jewish history begins during the Bronze age." Lord knows you never find bad information from random websites that pop up when you do google searches for specific phrases.

Although it is the bbc, so maybe it's correct.

Now, the SECOND link:

at the 2000BCE mark, it says " common ancestor of many Jews, Arabs, Turks, and Armenians" so clearly that point (during Middle Bronze Age II) predates the Jews.

next ...

Just under 1207 BC (or just under the Iron Age) it says "undatable: supposed era of Exodus."

Let's be clear about something. A forty year period that is undatable is placed in your own cited source as just before or around the time of the Iron Age.

Now, I will give you this. It is entirely possible that the Exodus happened in those few years before the recognized beginning of the iron age. It is equally possible that it did not. What is not possible is that it is datable, as you would know having read your own cited source thoroughly enough to have looked for the event that describes how the Jewish people came to be.

At least, that's how we describe the Exodus during Passover at my house.

Like I said, I'm not a scholar, I may be wrong.

Maybe, just maybe, it's time for you to say the same thing?

Because that timeline certainly goes through the bronze age, but all of that looks to me like a precursor, a lead-up story.

Here's another timeline for you.

And a whimsical little site that just straight up places the Iron Age well before the others.

But hey, that's the internet for you. I suppose it's not that authoritative, after all.
posted by shmegegge at 6:54 AM on May 6, 2005

I'm a girl and used tampons & menstruation & talking about it eep me out.

Just sayin'.

But the best thing I ever personally did in a drug store was go in early on a Saturday morning, freaking out, probably hungover, to buy a pregnancy test.

And then I went back two hours later to exchange it for a box of tampax.
posted by mygothlaundry at 9:50 AM on May 6, 2005

That's the best drug store purchase story I've heard, mygoth. Now I wanna go exchange home pregancy tests for tampons at all the drugstores around here, just to see the reactions.
posted by raedyn at 10:07 AM on May 6, 2005

Yuck.
posted by Doohickie at 10:23 AM on May 6, 2005

shmegegge, thankfully I am not a Talmudic scholar, either. I appreciate the fact that your family at Passover celebrates certain traditions of not-entirely verifiable historical facts -- same here: I mean, with my parents we celebrated the anniversary of this miracle maker allegedly coming back from the dead and then flying, like Superman, to heaven.
in my understanding, but then again I am not an archaeologist, experts are welcome to help me out on this, archealogy does not seem to be very generous with the Exodus tradition -- very little evidence of hundreds of thousands of people moving around the region at the time of a pharaoh's reign -- was it Ramses something? the Sinai, back then, was the home of a much smaller community than tradition indicates. no evidence of such a massive movement of people, either. I hear that fundys -- Xtian and Jewish alike -- are quite disturbed by this very lack of evidence for such a central event in their theology. reformed Jews and more open Xtians, on the other hand, do not seem to worry much about it.
you write "It is entirely possible that the Exodus happened in those few years before the recognized beginning of the iron age". I don't know. it probably never happened, and if it did almost certainly not in the massive way we read in tradition. again, scholars are welcome to help me out on this.
I admit I haven't read the .pdf linked above because the type is hard to read and I don't have a printer here. I just threw in a link to the BBC (usually a good source, don't you agree?) because I have always understood that Jewish history (or tradition) begins in the Bronze Age (an Age by the way that has different dates in Europe, the Middle East, etc.
I'll be very happy to hear somebody explain that I am wrong, of course. if Jewish tradition is more recent than I have read back when I cared more about such things, I'll be happy to have learnt something new -- that's what MeFi is for, right? well, for that and as an outlet for snarkiness of course. thanks for the pointers.

posted by matteo at 10:24 AM on May 6, 2005

matteo: "in my understanding, but then again I am not an archaeologist, experts are welcome to help me out on this, archealogy does not seem to be very generous with the Exodus tradition."

translation: "Hrm. So, in your religion, you follow people who claim to have talked to God? That's nice. See, in my religion, we claim to follow people who've talked to scientists. Sure, there's just as much 'faith' involved, because, well, I don't exactly know what those scientists have said, or what their arguments are, or anything. I only know this: my priests say your rabbis are crap. So there. *sticks out tongue*"

See, matteo, E.B. was a little short earlier in the thread, and I grant that he sounded cranky. But you're proving him right here.
posted by koeselitz at 11:07 AM on May 6, 2005

koeselitz, the burning straw men's smoke of your "translation" is just too unbearable, sorry. when you have time, you're also free to tell us where is the archaelogical evidence for the Exodus story. I'm genuinely interested.
posted by matteo at 11:24 AM on May 6, 2005

A religious person (maybe me) probably would answer: "Archaeological evidence means nothing. God is all-powerful." Either you have faith that he is, or you have faith that he isn't. Both are faith.

But you don't even seem to have carefully considered whatever it is you have faith in.
posted by koeselitz at 11:32 AM on May 6, 2005

Who needs archaelogical evidence when you've got cecil B. DeMille?
posted by jonmc at 11:33 AM on May 6, 2005

Either you have faith that he is, or you have faith that he isn't. Both are faith.

No, either you admit that based on lack of evidence, you don't know, or you claim to know irrefutably. One is wise, the other foolish.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 11:40 AM on May 6, 2005

"Archaeological evidence means nothing. God is all-powerful."

oh. O.K.

you know, next time somebody here attacks me, I'll point to this comment, and to the fact that I refused to add any kind of snarky repartee to it. I respect your opinion, koselitz -- that's the beauty of a secular, open society, after all.
(even if, frankly, the "secularism is faith" routine got a bit old by now).


But you don't even seem to have carefully considered whatever it is you have faith in.

you're wrong, the quick answer's very easy -- I believe in reason, in democracy, in the rule of law, and in equal rights.
(the longer answer would involve a long list of stuff I -- to use language I'm sure you understand -- believe in: stuff like gravity, penicillin, cortisone, blood tests, etc)
posted by matteo at 11:58 AM on May 6, 2005

Heh heh. This is fun.

matteo: "I respect your opinion, koselitz -- that's the beauty of a secular, open society, after all."

Thanks. I hope I don't spoil it by pointing out that, according to the track record, secular societies have actually been less open than religious ones. I'm all for openness, myself; that's one of the reasons I support religious societies. They foster mutual respest and thoughtfulness.

I shouldn't have said that you haven't considered what you believe in; that sounds awfully snarky. But it seems to me extremely unfair for you to sneer (that's how it sounded to me) about 'monotheism' and what you percieve as its backwardness when you really don't have an answer to it beyond 'I heard a rumor about archaeological evidence.'

My own answer to what people say about 'reason' against religion nowadays is this: religion is perfectly reasonable. It accepts evidence, and functions as the basis of science, insofar as science is founded on a belief that the world makes sense. To reject it in the name of 'reason' is unreasonable.
posted by koeselitz at 12:11 PM on May 6, 2005

can't we go back to talking about tampoons?
posted by jonmc at 12:17 PM on May 6, 2005

Cartoon tampons?
posted by liam at 12:19 PM on May 6, 2005

jonmc, is that a freudian slip combining lampoon and tampon? 'Cuz it was funny.
posted by schyler523 at 12:23 PM on May 6, 2005

cartoon tampoons chasing raccoons floating in balloons on friday afternoons.
posted by jonmc at 12:24 PM on May 6, 2005

schuyler, it's a intentional mispronunciation lifted from the Frank Zappa song "Flakes."
posted by jonmc at 12:25 PM on May 6, 2005

Aha! and btw, schuyler was the intended spelling of my name, but my mom forgot the u on the birth certificate...
posted by schyler523 at 12:28 PM on May 6, 2005

this thread is far grosser than anything possibly brought up in any ask me thread. ever.
posted by adampsyche at 12:38 PM on May 6, 2005

according to the track record

what?
the track record means nothing. God is all-powerful.
heh.


beyond 'I heard a rumor about archaeological evidence.'

no, it was not a rumor. while studying the New Testament, I remember reading about the many archaelogical problems that the Exodus story has (in short: 600,000 people walking through the region is not supported by evidence and that's one of the reasons why most historians disregard that tradition. as I said above, only the fundamentalist -- Jewish and Christian -- seem to have a problem with that. more open-minded believers accept that maybe it wasn't 600,000. maybe it was 60. or, maybe it's a tall tale). anyway, for your sake, even if your snarkiness didn't deserve such courtesy, I made a quick phone call to an archaelogist friend. he confirmed what I seemed to remember -- there is no evidence, no matter how much various fundy-funded (pun unintended) operations are trying to dig up something to back that account up. that's the problem with the OT -- a lof of the the evidence for its "historical" accounts (I'm not talking abour the miracles) is extremely shaky. the NT on the other hand, is at least a collection of narratives about a man whose existence can be backed up by different accounts and most historians. whether he was an apocalyptic prophet (like many other Jews in Roman-occupied Palestine), a faith healer or the Messiah (or all of the above), the debate is quite open.

this thread is far grosser than anything possibly brought up in any ask me thread. ever.


I know, EB's prose is indeed quite gross.

can we now resume that nice discussion about bloody chunky sex during menstruation?
posted by matteo at 12:43 PM on May 6, 2005

can be backed up by different accounts and most historians agree that he actually existed.

my bad.
posted by matteo at 12:46 PM on May 6, 2005

Geez matteo, the bbc and, what was it? Robotwisdom.com? You should have kept your mouth shut after skewering EB.

It'll pain you to realize that, by arguing for a Bronze Age date for the origin of Israel (not the Jews, they're a good 800 years later!), you're actually advancing the fundamentalist position that wants to date the Exods around 1400 BCE. You're cool to do that if you want.

But most scholars (i.e., people who do more than google searches for research and who consult articles even if the type is too hawd to wead) consider a date around 1200 BCE more plausible. There's a huge population explosion in the central hill country of Syro-Palestine during that time and this population can be differentiated on material cultural grounds from the surrounding populations. So, 1200 BCE is generally given as the date for the Late Bronze-Iron I transition.

Most of us, who've given up any thought of arguing for a reconstructible historical exodus, reckon that refugee populations, called in Egyptian sources apiru, gradually settled the Judean hills in response to a massive collapse of a series of Canaanite city states along the coastal plain during the Middle and Late Bronze Age. The Egyptians couldn't project power into the hill country because they were wretched tacticians and relied on chariotry. So these isolated settlements grew and, by about 1000 BCE had achieved sufficient central organization to begin to engage in centralized state formation.

So, there you have it. Whether or not they were fucking their menstruating wives at that time is beyond my powers to say. Maybe you can scare up a google link or two for us?
posted by felix betachat at 12:58 PM on May 6, 2005

You're cool to do that if you want.

I don't care, I'm not into tribal hate and I'm not planning to colonize the West Bank anytime soon. are you?



Whether or not they were fucking their menstruating wives at that time is beyond my powers to say


yes, but what we were discussing was, do you do that with your wife? unless you can scare up a Bronze Age ghost who's willing to talk about that.


even if the type is too hawd to wead

you're so mean. all that sex during menstruation probably damaged my eyes. google that up, it happens
posted by matteo at 1:17 PM on May 6, 2005

The Egyptians couldn't project power into the hill country because they were wretched tacticians and relied on chariotry.

That's exactly why I never play as them in Civ III.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 1:35 PM on May 6, 2005

Snap!
posted by AlexReynolds at 1:37 PM on May 6, 2005

PST: they don't do so hot in Master of Orion either. ;)
posted by schyler523 at 1:38 PM on May 6, 2005

Well, the best part is that matteo still seems to think that it was the Jews who thunk up the whole "menstruation is nasty" thing. Or was it Americans? Hmm. Whatever it is that he's pulling out of his ass today.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 4:27 PM on May 6, 2005

Alex, just want to say ... "You're very welcome". We have work to do, but smacking McGuire was a good damn start.

Unless, of course, there's another Alex Reynolds out there ... (Which there likely is), in which case, please disregard.

And EB, kiss off, please, I'm begging you ...
posted by Wulfgar! at 4:35 PM on May 6, 2005

jonmc, is that a super tampoon that is related to super troopers?
posted by fionab at 4:36 PM on May 6, 2005

Only on MetaFilter could we go from this:

...and then it looks like my future wife is pulling a skinned mouse from the place that our children will exit from.

to this:

So these isolated settlements grew and, by about 1000 BCE had achieved sufficient central organization to begin to engage in centralized state formation.
posted by Specklet at 4:48 PM on May 6, 2005

For everyone who responded to matteo's response to my response to his response:

I appreciate your opinion, I just want you to know that.

I also didn't get the kind of religious antogonism from his response that you guys seemed to have. I didn't think he was comparing religions for any reason other than to say "Religious texts say a lot of funky things. So much for religious texts." Which, whether one agrees with it or not, seems reasonable enough to me.

As much as I may have taken issue with a number of matteo's responses in the past, that one seemed pretty reasonable.

felix betachat: you're my hero.

matteo: believe it or not, I'm only half jewish. My family also celebrates flying resurrected gods.

jonmc: You know, my plumber he said "never flush a tampoon." That great information cost me half a week's pay, and the toilet blew up the very next day.
posted by shmegegge at 4:49 PM on May 6, 2005

LATER ON the next day! dammit!
posted by shmegegge at 4:57 PM on May 6, 2005

shmegegge, don't ask me, I'm just a Dancin' Fool...
posted by jonmc at 4:58 PM on May 6, 2005

Whatever it is that he's pulling out of his ass today.

Just a super tampoon.

I'm so sorry. Don't temt me like that
posted by jonmc at 5:00 PM on May 6, 2005

felix betachat, maybe you can tell me: when did they stop speaking Phoenician along (what's now) the Lebanese coast: Sidon, Tyre, places like that? And was it replaced with Aramaic? Because I've been getting conflicting stories and I want to know.

Also, I like the word "tampoon."
posted by languagehat at 5:18 PM on May 6, 2005

Oh yeah, super tampons come with a free cape in every box, too. My partner spends her menses running around the house with her arms out, saying "swoosh!"

Also, didn't Ahab go after the great white whale with a tampoon, only to get tangled in the string and drown?
posted by squirrel at 6:07 PM on May 6, 2005

And don't forget that great Ice Age novelist, Joseph Conrad, who wrote "Tampoon" along with "Heart of Darkness" as part of his famous "Mensostromo" trilogy. Powerful stuff.
posted by taz at 9:50 PM on May 6, 2005

There was this kid (punk rawk) who went around school wearing, among the other "shocking" acoutrements stapled to it, a tampoon stapled to his jacket. I don't remember anyone being shocked by it, but there was a feeling that by wearing it he imagined we WERE all embarrassed by him, which felt like an insult to our intelligence. (We were college kids. We practically LOOKED for things to be insulted about.) One day someone walked by him and "accidentally" bumped into him, spilling soda directly onto the tampoon.

*POOF!*

He never wore it again.
posted by shmegegge at 10:34 PM on May 6, 2005

We could start a series for the Oxygen crowd called National Tampoon; Barbara Wa-wa or Ellen could host.
posted by fionab at 11:04 PM on May 6, 2005

posted by taz at 12:00 AM on May 7, 2005

The success of "tampoon," proves that effective humor is not neccessarily coming up with a great line, but finding the perfect moment to use it. Two days ago, my subway was pulling into the final stop (mine) and the conductor announced that we would be held there for ten minute with the door closed while debris was cleared off the tracks. Amid all the moans and groans, I heard an old guy say in a squeaky voice, "What a way to run a railroad!"

As I chuckled, I thought "He's been waiting his whole life for the right moment to say that."
posted by jonmc at 7:24 AM on May 7, 2005

"And EB, kiss off, please, I'm begging you ..."

Ooh, I like it when you beg.

*kisses wulfgar!, slaps his ass playfully*

To hell with it. Some of you are really fucking stupid. You make baby Fiona cry.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 7:57 AM on May 7, 2005

Waaaaa....... oh, the other one.
posted by fionab at 8:12 AM on May 7, 2005

languagehat: I couldn't tell you off the top of my head. I'm a text guy, not a linguist. But I have a buddy who does NW Semitics and studied under Greenfield. I'll drop him a note and get back to you.

I don't think I'll tell him how the question came up, though...
posted by felix betachat at 8:26 AM on May 7, 2005

Would that whole biblical flood thing have happened if they'd had super tampoons?
posted by spaghetti at 8:58 AM on May 7, 2005

felix: Thanks!

*hands fionab a blanket*
posted by languagehat at 11:04 AM on May 7, 2005

I grew up in Tampa. Yanks sometimes called people like me Tampans. There's another definition of tampan that is oddly apposite to this discussion, if only by involving blood and being genuinely yucky.

Also, I first learned about menses when our lhasa apso started pulling my sisters' tampons out of the bathroom trash and ripping them up in the living room. Might explain any early aversion I had to the topic. Didn't stop me from boning bloody poon later in life though. Just thought I'd share that with you all.
posted by piskycritter at 1:41 PM on May 7, 2005

I happen to like the smell of period of the woman I love. In fact, once during my early youth, in the rush of passion we went at it without taking time to pull the plug and afterwords there were some scary and comical moments trying to find and excavate the bloody thing.
posted by semmi at 11:44 PM on May 7, 2005

Yuck.
posted by koeselitz at 11:48 AM on May 8, 2005