Is this thread taking a wierd detour?

January 27, 2014 5:10 AM

I don't understand why this thread is taking this weird route. At first I thought the worst thing that could happen to her was that she would be married off to an old dude and never heard from again. Then I realized that the worst thing was an acid attack.

Please tell me more about what is likely to happen, all of you expert Pakistani sociologists.

posted by hal_c_on to Etiquette/Policy at 5:10 AM (8 comments total)

Well the OP herself seems aware of some violent or illegal events directed at the women in her own life, so it doesn't seem that far-fetched to think there might be real danger in her travelling to Pakistan.
posted by billiebee at 5:20 AM on January 27, 2014 [15 favorites]

I think the worst case scenario is that she would be put to death for blasphemy.

Highly unlikely, but possible.
posted by koolkat at 5:20 AM on January 27, 2014

Well, she says that the worst thing is that she could be murdered by a family member the way her aunt was, but she's probably just being hysterical or making excuses for bad behavior. I'm sure she needs a man to talk some sense into her.

When someone tells you that they feel unsafe, I think it's at least worth entertaining the possibility that they might be accurately assessing the situation.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 5:22 AM on January 27, 2014 [105 favorites]

This is a really weird MeTa. I understand that, if you were to come out and say to an AskMe poster "you are way over-estimating the physical and emotional dangers, just go," suggesting you know her family and situation better than she does, it would get deleted. The solution to that problem is not a MeTa (preventing deletion), it's resisting the urge to make that comment.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:26 AM on January 27, 2014 [21 favorites]

Hit "post" too quickly. What positive outcome will possibly come from this MeTa? I imagine that you think shaming the poster and/or trotting out anti-Pakistani and anti-Muslim tropes are not your goal.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:29 AM on January 27, 2014 [4 favorites]

I don't understand this meta, hal_c_on. From the OP's original question:

Many of my family members are extremely conservative yet shady, untrustworthy people, and I am point-blank afraid of one of my uncles and my cousin - they have never been violent towards me, but they are violent men.

OP is in no doubt that violence is on the cards. You suggested that bringing the boyfriend along with permission would make the problems go away.

This isn't a case of people playing armchair sociologists second guessing Pakistanis as violent.

This is people taking OP's statements that her extended family are violent at face value, agreeing that the risk is too high and recommending accordingly.
posted by MuffinMan at 5:30 AM on January 27, 2014 [33 favorites]

Please tell me more about what is likely to happen, all of you expert Pakistani sociologists.

This sentence sounds like passive aggressive slap at the user base. Cut it out, you're acting like an asshole.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:47 AM on January 27, 2014 [45 favorites]

Yeah, let's go ahead and close this up. I don't think the Ask Me OP deserves a big angry freak-out thread on Metatalk. hal_c_on, you can bring up the problems you see in terms of Metafilter's treatment of Pakistan in a different thread that is maybe less angry lashing out and sarcasm, and won't put someone else's life under the microscope here.
posted by taz (staff) at 5:51 AM on January 27, 2014 [11 favorites]