Passing of Danf October 12, 2015 9:28 AM Subscribe
At the request of his family, it's my sad duty to let you know that MeFite Danf has died.
I met Dan several times when we were both visiting New York and he and his wife Vicki stayed me in England. He was a gentle giant of a man who loved people and music, and I will miss him immensely.
About two years ago Dan was diagnosed with malignant melanoma, and fought it bravely until the battle was finally lost. From Vicki: "Dan passed at home yesterday (Sunday) at 6 a.m. He was surrounded by his favorite women: his daughter Aspen, her partner Marie, his sister Pam, our beloved neighbor Dawn and myself."
Here is Dan's contribution to the Metafilter music community; please listen, enjoy his music and remember Dan today.
I met Dan several times when we were both visiting New York and he and his wife Vicki stayed me in England. He was a gentle giant of a man who loved people and music, and I will miss him immensely.
About two years ago Dan was diagnosed with malignant melanoma, and fought it bravely until the battle was finally lost. From Vicki: "Dan passed at home yesterday (Sunday) at 6 a.m. He was surrounded by his favorite women: his daughter Aspen, her partner Marie, his sister Pam, our beloved neighbor Dawn and myself."
Here is Dan's contribution to the Metafilter music community; please listen, enjoy his music and remember Dan today.
Just listening to his Summertime Blues, which reminds me of John Fahey, which makes me sadder because we need more people who play like John Fahey in this world, not fewer.
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posted by benito.strauss at 9:32 AM on October 12, 2015 [5 favorites]
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posted by benito.strauss at 9:32 AM on October 12, 2015 [5 favorites]
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posted by needlegrrl at 9:33 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by needlegrrl at 9:33 AM on October 12, 2015
We had fun when he visited NYC. RIP, buddy, and my thoughts are with your wife and family.
posted by jonmc at 9:33 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by jonmc at 9:33 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
So sad to hear about this. He was a long-time nice presence on the site, and as essexjan notes a musician who posted some very nice stuff to Music over the years. His Ralph Stanley cover last spring is getting me a bit right now.
I finally met him in person last fall, when he came out to a meetup in Portland; it was a little bit of a schlep for him and his wife, but they came on down to Apex and we sat and talked and had some beers and it was a really lovely afternoon/evening. I'd known he was ill, but he was in good spirits at the time. I'm thankful I got the chance to spend some time with him.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:37 AM on October 12, 2015 [10 favorites]
I finally met him in person last fall, when he came out to a meetup in Portland; it was a little bit of a schlep for him and his wife, but they came on down to Apex and we sat and talked and had some beers and it was a really lovely afternoon/evening. I'd known he was ill, but he was in good spirits at the time. I'm thankful I got the chance to spend some time with him.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:37 AM on October 12, 2015 [10 favorites]
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posted by bitterpants at 9:42 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by ChuraChura at 9:43 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by ChuraChura at 9:43 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by SisterHavana at 9:44 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by SisterHavana at 9:44 AM on October 12, 2015
Jan, thanks for this. I was considering posting this, but could not find an obit anywhere.
I was there with cortex last fall when DanF and his wife had come to the meetup. It was so lovely to meet him, and he was definitely in some pain at the time. I remember thinking that it was awfully nice of him to travel so far. They even stayed overnight.
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posted by Stewriffic at 9:45 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
I was there with cortex last fall when DanF and his wife had come to the meetup. It was so lovely to meet him, and he was definitely in some pain at the time. I remember thinking that it was awfully nice of him to travel so far. They even stayed overnight.
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posted by Stewriffic at 9:45 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
I never got to meet Dan in person, but I know he was a sweetheart, and will be missed.
posted by Specklet at 9:45 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by Specklet at 9:45 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by Rock Steady at 9:46 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by Rock Steady at 9:46 AM on October 12, 2015
He was a fascinating guy. I'm glad I got to meet him IRL.
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posted by janell at 9:50 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by janell at 9:50 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by boo_radley at 9:53 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by boo_radley at 9:53 AM on October 12, 2015
When we were in London, on the last day of their trip I took Dan and Vicki on a shortcut down Denmark Street. For those who don't know, it is wall-to-wall guitar stores, some selling vintage pieces that were played by Hendrix, Clapton, etc.
"Why didn't you bring me down here before?!" cried Dan, his eyes glazing over at the sight of hundreds of guitars.
"Thank GOD you didn't bring him down here before!" replied Vicki, "we'd have gone home bankrupt."
He was a good man and a good friend. He also made the most amazing enchiladas.
posted by essexjan at 9:53 AM on October 12, 2015 [27 favorites]
"Why didn't you bring me down here before?!" cried Dan, his eyes glazing over at the sight of hundreds of guitars.
"Thank GOD you didn't bring him down here before!" replied Vicki, "we'd have gone home bankrupt."
He was a good man and a good friend. He also made the most amazing enchiladas.
posted by essexjan at 9:53 AM on October 12, 2015 [27 favorites]
I never met him except electronically either, but he was unfailingly kind and considerate and helpful in all our communications. He handled his illness with the same grace and intelligence that he seemed to approach everything. I have been feeling his absence here and on MetaChat and I am going to miss him very much. I send a very sincere internet hug and all my sympathy to his family, who I know he adored.
posted by bearwife at 9:55 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by bearwife at 9:55 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
Oh no, I had totally planned to meet him next year on a road trip to Oregon. He didn't know this yet. My condolences to his friends and family.
posted by desjardins at 9:56 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by desjardins at 9:56 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
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posted by angelchrys at 9:56 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by nom de poop at 9:59 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by ogooglebar at 10:09 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by ogooglebar at 10:09 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by mothershock at 10:10 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by mothershock at 10:10 AM on October 12, 2015
I remember Dan from the days when I was more active in Metachat and I always thought he was a great guy. My kind thoughts and condolences are with his family and loved ones.
posted by matildaben at 10:13 AM on October 12, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by matildaben at 10:13 AM on October 12, 2015 [3 favorites]
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posted by tickingclock at 10:14 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by tickingclock at 10:14 AM on October 12, 2015
I was so sad and sorry to hear about this. Dan was a kind, thoughtful and helpful presence here who always seemed to think about the inner meaning of things and cared about how to reach that. A couple of stories from him: on Leonard Cohen's approach to a disruptive fan; on one of the many oddities that he sometimes needed to address in his job. We didn't get a final update on that one (this was before we had the option for mods to add that for people, I think), but he said, "I took this to my immediate boss, and he directed me to use the utmost discretion and sensitivity," and I'm absolutely sure he did exactly that. Love to Dan and his family and friends.
posted by taz (staff) at 10:16 AM on October 12, 2015 [12 favorites]
posted by taz (staff) at 10:16 AM on October 12, 2015 [12 favorites]
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posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 10:17 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 10:17 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by misteraitch at 10:17 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by misteraitch at 10:17 AM on October 12, 2015
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Listening to "Summertime Blues" right now and it's gorgeous.
posted by WidgetAlley at 10:17 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
Listening to "Summertime Blues" right now and it's gorgeous.
posted by WidgetAlley at 10:17 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
He addressed his illness occassionally on MetaFilter, and it was one of his stories that came to mind just now:
I have stage IV melanoma. The good news is that there are drugs which can actually be effective, for some people. The bad news that it's still pretty dire.
Early on, when this was discovered, I was in the hospital, a day after spine surgery, and an acquaintance visited and gave me a book called Proof of Heaven. My atheist daughter and pagan wife were there, daughter complimenting me on my restraint.
This disease may well (or may not) end my days, but each day I am alive feels like a repudiation of this person's (well-meaning) efforts to provide me comfort.
My wife tossed the book into the first free bin that she saw.
May your legacy be one of continued repudiation.
posted by maxsparber at 10:19 AM on October 12, 2015 [53 favorites]
I have stage IV melanoma. The good news is that there are drugs which can actually be effective, for some people. The bad news that it's still pretty dire.
Early on, when this was discovered, I was in the hospital, a day after spine surgery, and an acquaintance visited and gave me a book called Proof of Heaven. My atheist daughter and pagan wife were there, daughter complimenting me on my restraint.
This disease may well (or may not) end my days, but each day I am alive feels like a repudiation of this person's (well-meaning) efforts to provide me comfort.
My wife tossed the book into the first free bin that she saw.
May your legacy be one of continued repudiation.
posted by maxsparber at 10:19 AM on October 12, 2015 [53 favorites]
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posted by agatha_magatha at 10:19 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by agatha_magatha at 10:19 AM on October 12, 2015
My condolences to Dan's family and friends. He was wonderful and welcome presence in our little slice of the internet and he will be missed.
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posted by Ufez Jones at 10:22 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
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posted by Ufez Jones at 10:22 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
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posted by Monsieur Caution at 10:29 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by saulgoodman at 10:30 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by MCMikeNamara at 10:32 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by MCMikeNamara at 10:32 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by audi alteram partem at 10:33 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by dialetheia at 10:35 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by dialetheia at 10:35 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by MonkeyToes at 10:36 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by MonkeyToes at 10:36 AM on October 12, 2015
Melanoma is such a mean disease. I'm so sorry he's gone.
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posted by Metroid Baby at 10:39 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by Metroid Baby at 10:39 AM on October 12, 2015
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(and I like that profiles of deceased members are now getting a note. thanks mods.)
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:39 AM on October 12, 2015 [8 favorites]
(and I like that profiles of deceased members are now getting a note. thanks mods.)
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:39 AM on October 12, 2015 [8 favorites]
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posted by Xavier Xavier at 10:40 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by Xavier Xavier at 10:40 AM on October 12, 2015
oh man! I remember him from Metachat. It's a sad sad day today.
posted by ramix at 10:43 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by ramix at 10:43 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
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posted by pibeandres at 10:59 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by pibeandres at 10:59 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by Grangousier at 10:59 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by Grangousier at 10:59 AM on October 12, 2015
So sorry to hear this! I'm another who remembers him fondly from MetaChat. My thoughts are with his friends and family.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:00 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:00 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
Wow I am sorry to hear this. I can't help wondering if his recording of Gloryland was made with intent but either way, what a wonderful, tangible thing to leave the people who are missing him.
posted by DarlingBri at 11:04 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by DarlingBri at 11:04 AM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
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posted by Chrysostom at 11:07 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by Chrysostom at 11:07 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by Room 641-A at 11:08 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by Room 641-A at 11:08 AM on October 12, 2015
Dan was good people, and he will be sorely missed in our little corner of the world.
Fuck cancer.
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posted by msali at 11:08 AM on October 12, 2015
Fuck cancer.
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posted by msali at 11:08 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by mikelieman at 11:14 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by mikelieman at 11:14 AM on October 12, 2015
Metastatic melanoma killed my father five years ago. It was my first exposure to cancer on such a personal level and I was (and remain) flabbergasted to learn that melanoma is so virulent and that our treatments are by and large so ineffectual once it spreads. It is a terrible disease that takes people far too quickly. I never knew Danf except from his posts, but my heart just skipped a beat when I saw the title of this thread. I'm so sorry for his family and those of you who knew him well.
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posted by something something at 11:18 AM on October 12, 2015 [2 favorites]
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posted by something something at 11:18 AM on October 12, 2015 [2 favorites]
I met him in person in NYC, and I will miss him very much. He always had kind things to say to me, I could feel that he was a person who really cared about others.
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posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 11:23 AM on October 12, 2015 [2 favorites]
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posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 11:23 AM on October 12, 2015 [2 favorites]
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posted by oneswellfoop at 11:47 AM on October 12, 2015
posted by oneswellfoop at 11:47 AM on October 12, 2015
Oh, no. I was out of town during a meet up he attended and very much looked forward to seeing Danf in person someday in the future. All my best thoughts to his family and friends.
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posted by but no cigar at 11:49 AM on October 12, 2015
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posted by but no cigar at 11:49 AM on October 12, 2015
Crap, this was surprising and sad news to me. I've always recognized his username around these parts and on many other sites as a generally all-around nice dude. A couple years ago during a Hodgman comedy night in Eugene, I finally got to meet him and his wife and he was just as nice as I imagined.
Funny story, that night I met Danf, I talked to Hodgman before the show and John said something like "oh, if there's some dead time, I might call you up on stage to do a thing, is that alright?" and I said "sure" to help a friend, but neglected to mention I've never done any stage comedy of any kind in my life and had no idea what was ahead.
So about an hour into the show I think I'm in the clear and suddenly Hodgman goes "Is Matt Haughey in the audience, can you come up?" and I start walking up and John mentions I created MetaFilter and there is one single lone "Woo!" from the silent crowd that let me know only one person in the audience had ever heard of the site (it was Danf). I go on stage and to say it went terribly wrong is to do disservice to the word terrible. I basically locked up with stage fright staring out at 500 people, could barely muster a sentence, and then Hodgman realized we didn't even rehearse the bit and it would come off weird when he starts yelling at me for laughs, so Hodgman pulled in someone from backstage to end the bit and I got to quietly fade into the wings.
When it was all over, I asked myself "did I make that show worse by being part of it?" and Dan came up to me right after and said it was great and he was happy to see me up there and we chatted for a bit and it made me feel tons better about the night.
I'll miss Danf. Rest in peace.
posted by mathowie (retired) at 11:50 AM on October 12, 2015 [66 favorites]
Funny story, that night I met Danf, I talked to Hodgman before the show and John said something like "oh, if there's some dead time, I might call you up on stage to do a thing, is that alright?" and I said "sure" to help a friend, but neglected to mention I've never done any stage comedy of any kind in my life and had no idea what was ahead.
So about an hour into the show I think I'm in the clear and suddenly Hodgman goes "Is Matt Haughey in the audience, can you come up?" and I start walking up and John mentions I created MetaFilter and there is one single lone "Woo!" from the silent crowd that let me know only one person in the audience had ever heard of the site (it was Danf). I go on stage and to say it went terribly wrong is to do disservice to the word terrible. I basically locked up with stage fright staring out at 500 people, could barely muster a sentence, and then Hodgman realized we didn't even rehearse the bit and it would come off weird when he starts yelling at me for laughs, so Hodgman pulled in someone from backstage to end the bit and I got to quietly fade into the wings.
When it was all over, I asked myself "did I make that show worse by being part of it?" and Dan came up to me right after and said it was great and he was happy to see me up there and we chatted for a bit and it made me feel tons better about the night.
I'll miss Danf. Rest in peace.
posted by mathowie (retired) at 11:50 AM on October 12, 2015 [66 favorites]
Dan came up to me right after and said it was great and he was happy to see me up there and we chatted for a bit and it made me feel tons better about the night.
He had a very kind and quiet sort of grace that I always appreciated and I delighted in reading his stories about music, his family and travels he'd made. My thoughts are with his family. He will be missed.
posted by jessamyn (retired) at 12:03 PM on October 12, 2015 [4 favorites]
He had a very kind and quiet sort of grace that I always appreciated and I delighted in reading his stories about music, his family and travels he'd made. My thoughts are with his family. He will be missed.
posted by jessamyn (retired) at 12:03 PM on October 12, 2015 [4 favorites]
I'm overall very much opposed to perfectly good mefites passing away, and I seriously wish they'd stop.
Rest in peace, Danf.
posted by Namlit at 12:03 PM on October 12, 2015 [16 favorites]
Rest in peace, Danf.
posted by Namlit at 12:03 PM on October 12, 2015 [16 favorites]
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posted by Rustic Etruscan at 12:06 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by Rustic Etruscan at 12:06 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by The Great Big Mulp at 12:23 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 12:23 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by SpacemanStix at 12:24 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by Blue Jello Elf at 12:25 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by chicainthecity at 12:31 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by jason's_planet at 12:39 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 12:41 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 12:41 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by fluffy battle kitten at 12:43 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by fluffy battle kitten at 12:43 PM on October 12, 2015
I think I mostly knew Danf through Music but his tracks were always worth a listen. Reading the words of folks that met him in person, I'm glad to know that he was as cool a guy as his music suggested. Sorry to hear this today.
posted by TwoWordReview at 12:45 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by TwoWordReview at 12:45 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by NoraCharles at 1:06 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by NoraCharles at 1:06 PM on October 12, 2015
Oh damn. He was a great contributor to Metachat and I'd known about his cancer but didn't realize how bad it had gotten. Happy that he passed while surrounded by loved ones but it's damn unfair to go that young.
posted by octothorpe at 1:07 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by octothorpe at 1:07 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by supercrayon at 1:08 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by supercrayon at 1:08 PM on October 12, 2015
He is a contributor I always kept an eye out for. It is a gift to read personal remembrances of him.
posted by muddgirl at 1:15 PM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by muddgirl at 1:15 PM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
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posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 1:18 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 1:18 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by mandolin conspiracy at 1:23 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by purpleclover at 1:25 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by mynameisluka at 1:32 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by cybercoitus interruptus at 1:34 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by arcticseal at 1:49 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 1:51 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 1:51 PM on October 12, 2015
Oh! I always really liked Danf. So sorry to his family.
posted by latkes at 1:56 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by latkes at 1:56 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by homunculus at 2:10 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by homunculus at 2:10 PM on October 12, 2015
Such sad news. Dan and I were Facebook friends and also interacted some at MetaChat and I'm trying to get my head around the reality that I won't see more posts from him, either on Facebook, here, or on MetaChat.
I also note that he retired in April 2013, and would have been diagnosed with cancer shortly after, so he never even got to enjoy the retirement he'd earned. Fuck cancer with a rusty pitchfork.
posted by orange swan at 2:17 PM on October 12, 2015 [2 favorites]
I also note that he retired in April 2013, and would have been diagnosed with cancer shortly after, so he never even got to enjoy the retirement he'd earned. Fuck cancer with a rusty pitchfork.
posted by orange swan at 2:17 PM on October 12, 2015 [2 favorites]
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posted by foodbedgospel at 2:18 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by ghostbikes at 2:21 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by gingerbeer at 2:22 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by Grandysaur at 2:24 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by Grandysaur at 2:24 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 2:41 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 2:41 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by Diagonalize at 2:59 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by Diagonalize at 2:59 PM on October 12, 2015
Oh, shit. Just shit, shit, shit.
I met Danf on a business trip to Eugene. As I often do when visiting a town for work I posted a meetup invite and Dan was the only person who was able to make it that day. He listened to my blabbing about the site, my family, my job, and such. And I heard him out about his wife, kid, Eugene, his music. A lovely soul. We shared a few beers and some chicken. Neither of us was in much of a hurry so we walked around town on a golden autumn evening, shooting the breeze about Eugene, and books, and people judging others as weird. Afterwords, we stopped by a little bakery so I get some gifts for my kids. Cookies and fudge. Such a kind and generous guy.
Maybe he didn't know then but he never mentioned being sick. I suspect it had more to do with being a good listener. Weird how you can meet a person and immediately see their kind and gentle soul, and then they slip away from your thoughts because of ... maybe the distance between coasts.
Thanks, Danf, for a lovely evening and your simple kindness.
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posted by Toekneesan at 3:02 PM on October 12, 2015 [11 favorites]
I met Danf on a business trip to Eugene. As I often do when visiting a town for work I posted a meetup invite and Dan was the only person who was able to make it that day. He listened to my blabbing about the site, my family, my job, and such. And I heard him out about his wife, kid, Eugene, his music. A lovely soul. We shared a few beers and some chicken. Neither of us was in much of a hurry so we walked around town on a golden autumn evening, shooting the breeze about Eugene, and books, and people judging others as weird. Afterwords, we stopped by a little bakery so I get some gifts for my kids. Cookies and fudge. Such a kind and generous guy.
Maybe he didn't know then but he never mentioned being sick. I suspect it had more to do with being a good listener. Weird how you can meet a person and immediately see their kind and gentle soul, and then they slip away from your thoughts because of ... maybe the distance between coasts.
Thanks, Danf, for a lovely evening and your simple kindness.
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posted by Toekneesan at 3:02 PM on October 12, 2015 [11 favorites]
Dan was vocal aboout his past as a surfer, and knew about my northeasterner's obsession with the sport. When we met, he said if I ever made it to the west coast he'd show me how. Well, if ever do catch a wave, I'll think of you, bro.
posted by jonmc at 3:14 PM on October 12, 2015 [5 favorites]
posted by jonmc at 3:14 PM on October 12, 2015 [5 favorites]
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posted by Johnny Wallflower at 3:20 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 3:20 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by GenjiandProust at 3:23 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by GenjiandProust at 3:23 PM on October 12, 2015
crap. You'll be missed, Danf.
posted by pjern at 3:23 PM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by pjern at 3:23 PM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
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posted by EndsOfInvention at 3:26 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by Unicorn on the cob at 3:34 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 3:34 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by Ivan Fyodorovich at 3:41 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by Ivan Fyodorovich at 3:41 PM on October 12, 2015
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we were also Flickr friends. I am quite saddened indeed and wish his family well.
posted by crush-onastick at 4:00 PM on October 12, 2015
we were also Flickr friends. I am quite saddened indeed and wish his family well.
posted by crush-onastick at 4:00 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by bitter-girl.com at 4:06 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by bitter-girl.com at 4:06 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by The Wrong Kind of Cheese at 4:22 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by The Wrong Kind of Cheese at 4:22 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by the man of twists and turns at 4:36 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by the man of twists and turns at 4:36 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by stagewhisper at 5:09 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by stagewhisper at 5:09 PM on October 12, 2015
I knew him only from his comments here and somehow managed to miss his mentions of his illness. This is really sad news and I feel for his family.
posted by Dip Flash at 5:28 PM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by Dip Flash at 5:28 PM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
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posted by Existential Dread at 5:37 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by Existential Dread at 5:37 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by computech_apolloniajames at 5:40 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by computech_apolloniajames at 5:40 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by biggreenplant at 5:50 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by biggreenplant at 5:50 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by sarcasticah at 6:05 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by sarcasticah at 6:05 PM on October 12, 2015
Not just fuck cancer, fuck the doctors who blew off his complaints of back pain without looking into his past history of melanoma until it was too late.
posted by brujita at 6:37 PM on October 12, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by brujita at 6:37 PM on October 12, 2015 [3 favorites]
I met danf only twice, but we were internet friends for so long, facilitated mostly via Metachat, and corresponded here and there, that I considered him a good friend. I was very much hoping he'd stick around so I could taunt him about my Mets - hopefully - beating his Dodgers.
I will miss him very much.
posted by gaspode at 6:51 PM on October 12, 2015 [4 favorites]
I will miss him very much.
posted by gaspode at 6:51 PM on October 12, 2015 [4 favorites]
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So sorry to hear he lost his battle. He was an engaging and fun member of metachat back in the day. My thoughts are with Vickie and his family.
posted by disclaimer at 6:56 PM on October 12, 2015
So sorry to hear he lost his battle. He was an engaging and fun member of metachat back in the day. My thoughts are with Vickie and his family.
posted by disclaimer at 6:56 PM on October 12, 2015
OH how sad. It was not but a day or so ago that I thought of him and realized we hadn't heard an update in some time, and said to myself, "self, you should post on MetaChat and see how Danf is doing." I didn't and it would've been too late.
I knew Danf through MetaChat chat and we had many a good talk about music. He sent me a few of his tracks, and they really are John Fahey-like. He was a terrific fingerstyle player. Every so often his tracks come around again in my iTunes and I enjoy them all over again, and always will.
He was never anything but kind to everyone online. He had some funny and some wince-worthy stories about his job serving a school district for many years. He seemed patient and forbearing and really attuned to nature and eternally optimistic. I'm sorry this day has come and I wish peace for his wife, his daughter, and his many friends.
posted by Miko at 7:44 PM on October 12, 2015 [5 favorites]
I knew Danf through MetaChat chat and we had many a good talk about music. He sent me a few of his tracks, and they really are John Fahey-like. He was a terrific fingerstyle player. Every so often his tracks come around again in my iTunes and I enjoy them all over again, and always will.
He was never anything but kind to everyone online. He had some funny and some wince-worthy stories about his job serving a school district for many years. He seemed patient and forbearing and really attuned to nature and eternally optimistic. I'm sorry this day has come and I wish peace for his wife, his daughter, and his many friends.
posted by Miko at 7:44 PM on October 12, 2015 [5 favorites]
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posted by ocherdraco at 7:56 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by ocherdraco at 7:56 PM on October 12, 2015
I saw this note from his daughter Aspen via my Facebook feed, and I really didn't want it to be true. I remember him from MetaChat mostly, and he was always kind to me. I think I recall that he was a former Southern Californian, and I was always glad to know there was at least one other ex-pat SoCalian there and here who was kind and still remembered my home state with some amount of fondness.
posted by TrishaLynn at 8:02 PM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by TrishaLynn at 8:02 PM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
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posted by rangefinder 1.4 at 8:09 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by rangefinder 1.4 at 8:09 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 8:21 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 8:21 PM on October 12, 2015
Hi everyone,
My name is Aspen. I am Danf's daughter. I can't tell you how appreciative my family and myself are of all these comments, both here and on Metachat. They are a little overwhelming to read right now, but all your kind words mean so much and are so affirming of who my dad was as a person. I confess, I've been clicking on his profile and laughing at some of the posts he made on here. This one in particular made me laugh a lot.
I know how highly he thought of all his friends on this site. He was always so excited to go to meetups and meet whomever he could IRL. He had a MeFi shirt and hat he wore with pride. I can definitely see why he loved participating in the culture here, you are all most definitely "his people."
I wrote an obituary for him (he really wanted to write it himself, but never got the chance. I hope I did him justice). It won't be published for a few days, but I'll link it here when it goes up.
Thank you again. I feel so proud and lucky to be his daughter, and I'm so pleased to see how many people were touched by him.
posted by aspenkf at 8:52 PM on October 12, 2015 [111 favorites]
My name is Aspen. I am Danf's daughter. I can't tell you how appreciative my family and myself are of all these comments, both here and on Metachat. They are a little overwhelming to read right now, but all your kind words mean so much and are so affirming of who my dad was as a person. I confess, I've been clicking on his profile and laughing at some of the posts he made on here. This one in particular made me laugh a lot.
I know how highly he thought of all his friends on this site. He was always so excited to go to meetups and meet whomever he could IRL. He had a MeFi shirt and hat he wore with pride. I can definitely see why he loved participating in the culture here, you are all most definitely "his people."
I wrote an obituary for him (he really wanted to write it himself, but never got the chance. I hope I did him justice). It won't be published for a few days, but I'll link it here when it goes up.
Thank you again. I feel so proud and lucky to be his daughter, and I'm so pleased to see how many people were touched by him.
posted by aspenkf at 8:52 PM on October 12, 2015 [111 favorites]
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posted by eyeballkid at 8:55 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by eyeballkid at 8:55 PM on October 12, 2015
aspenkf, welcome to Mefi - thanks for sharing your dad with us all these years. The "."s are a Mefi convention for a moment of silence/offering your respects for someone. Sending you and your mom sympathy and good thoughts.
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 8:57 PM on October 12, 2015 [8 favorites]
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 8:57 PM on October 12, 2015 [8 favorites]
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posted by lalochezia at 9:07 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by lalochezia at 9:07 PM on October 12, 2015
Very sorry to hear this. I always appreciated and enjoyed his contributions to Music.
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posted by chococat at 9:21 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by chococat at 9:21 PM on October 12, 2015
I mostly knew him via Metachat when I was more active there - I'll miss him.
posted by casarkos at 9:33 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by casarkos at 9:33 PM on October 12, 2015
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posted by mochapickle at 9:56 PM on October 12, 2015
posted by mochapickle at 9:56 PM on October 12, 2015
Such a good man. What a loss.
posted by tangerine at 11:59 PM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by tangerine at 11:59 PM on October 12, 2015 [1 favorite]
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posted by hydropsyche at 3:40 AM on October 13, 2015
posted by hydropsyche at 3:40 AM on October 13, 2015
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posted by cooker girl at 4:53 AM on October 13, 2015
posted by cooker girl at 4:53 AM on October 13, 2015
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posted by Going To Maine at 8:22 AM on October 13, 2015
posted by Going To Maine at 8:22 AM on October 13, 2015
These threads are bittersweet. You either get to be terribly mournful because you knew the person and what a bright light they were that's now extinguished. Or you are left sad that you didn't get the chance to know the person better.
I'm very thankful this is the kind of place where kind people stop to remember their friends so thoughtfully.
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posted by allkindsoftime at 9:15 AM on October 13, 2015 [11 favorites]
I'm very thankful this is the kind of place where kind people stop to remember their friends so thoughtfully.
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posted by allkindsoftime at 9:15 AM on October 13, 2015 [11 favorites]
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posted by catchingsignals at 9:23 AM on October 13, 2015
posted by catchingsignals at 9:23 AM on October 13, 2015
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posted by one teak forest at 11:12 AM on October 13, 2015
posted by one teak forest at 11:12 AM on October 13, 2015
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posted by spinifex23 at 11:25 AM on October 13, 2015
posted by spinifex23 at 11:25 AM on October 13, 2015
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posted by Foci for Analysis at 1:23 PM on October 13, 2015
posted by Foci for Analysis at 1:23 PM on October 13, 2015
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posted by mediareport at 9:41 PM on October 13, 2015
posted by mediareport at 9:41 PM on October 13, 2015
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posted by i feel possessed at 12:56 AM on October 14, 2015
posted by i feel possessed at 12:56 AM on October 14, 2015
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posted by Smart Dalek at 7:55 AM on October 14, 2015
posted by Smart Dalek at 7:55 AM on October 14, 2015
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posted by redindiaink at 9:28 AM on October 14, 2015
posted by redindiaink at 9:28 AM on October 14, 2015
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Four years ago now, I was planning a trip to Oregon during a trying personal time, and he didn't know that of course, but he was very kind to me via text. I appreciated it very much.
posted by Medieval Maven at 12:56 PM on October 14, 2015 [2 favorites]
Four years ago now, I was planning a trip to Oregon during a trying personal time, and he didn't know that of course, but he was very kind to me via text. I appreciated it very much.
posted by Medieval Maven at 12:56 PM on October 14, 2015 [2 favorites]
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posted by unreasonable at 5:50 PM on October 14, 2015
posted by unreasonable at 5:50 PM on October 14, 2015
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posted by hapax_legomenon at 10:13 PM on October 14, 2015
posted by hapax_legomenon at 10:13 PM on October 14, 2015
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posted by not_on_display at 10:17 PM on October 14, 2015
posted by not_on_display at 10:17 PM on October 14, 2015
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posted by TheophileEscargot at 10:32 PM on October 14, 2015
posted by TheophileEscargot at 10:32 PM on October 14, 2015
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posted by not the fingers, not the fingers at 11:27 PM on October 14, 2015
posted by not the fingers, not the fingers at 11:27 PM on October 14, 2015
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posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 4:20 AM on October 15, 2015
posted by Ray Walston, Luck Dragon at 4:20 AM on October 15, 2015
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posted by longdaysjourney at 9:22 AM on October 15, 2015
posted by longdaysjourney at 9:22 AM on October 15, 2015
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posted by GrammarMoses at 11:10 AM on October 15, 2015
posted by GrammarMoses at 11:10 AM on October 15, 2015
Mefites are literally the best kind of ites. God bless every one of you motherfuckers.
...beating his Dodgers.
I'll be damned. It *is* possible to forgive the most egregious of sins after death.
Loved his music, loved his contributions, this stupid collection of bits and bytes held on a magnet somewhere preserves more of a persons soul than any damn grave stone in the ground and I'm glad we have dans soul living among us forever.
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posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:53 PM on October 15, 2015 [12 favorites]
...beating his Dodgers.
I'll be damned. It *is* possible to forgive the most egregious of sins after death.
Loved his music, loved his contributions, this stupid collection of bits and bytes held on a magnet somewhere preserves more of a persons soul than any damn grave stone in the ground and I'm glad we have dans soul living among us forever.
.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:53 PM on October 15, 2015 [12 favorites]
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posted by Joey Michaels at 7:47 PM on October 16, 2015
posted by Joey Michaels at 7:47 PM on October 16, 2015
• 🎼
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 9:57 PM on October 16, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 9:57 PM on October 16, 2015 [2 favorites]
Wow, so sorry about this, my condolences to friends and family on Dan's sad and too-soon passing. Thanks for those who knew him sharing stories and remembrances - what a nice guy, what a sad loss.
posted by madamjujujive at 12:25 PM on October 17, 2015
posted by madamjujujive at 12:25 PM on October 17, 2015
. for the man who I never met but sounds like a wonderful guy
and . for the lovely music he put out into the world.
posted by greenish at 4:01 AM on October 18, 2015
and . for the lovely music he put out into the world.
posted by greenish at 4:01 AM on October 18, 2015
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posted by voltairemodern at 6:41 PM on October 18, 2015
posted by voltairemodern at 6:41 PM on October 18, 2015
Aspen, I'm sure you don't need an internet stranger to tell you this right now, but your dad's love for you, and his great pride in you, is the thing I will remember most about him. (Your mom, too, of course, but especially you.) I knew your dad from back in the busy Metachat days, and I often found myself thinking "Man, there are so many kids who would have different lives if they had such a supportive parent." I'm sure he had his annoying parent faults, but I can tell you that his love for you -- even as he typed words on websites -- positively radiated.
So sorry for your loss.
posted by mudpuppie at 6:39 PM on October 19, 2015 [21 favorites]
So sorry for your loss.
posted by mudpuppie at 6:39 PM on October 19, 2015 [21 favorites]
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posted by augustimagination at 8:22 PM on October 19, 2015
posted by augustimagination at 8:22 PM on October 19, 2015
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posted by infinite intimation at 5:39 AM on October 22, 2015
posted by infinite intimation at 5:39 AM on October 22, 2015
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posted by quonsar II: smock fishpants and the temple of foon at 9:31 AM on October 12, 2015