I got an amusing email relating to this earwaxy thread from last year

February 12, 2007 9:38 AM

I got an amusing email relating to this earwaxy thread from last year. [more inside]
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane (staff) to MetaFilter-Related at 9:38 AM (37 comments total)

Dear Goodnewsfortheinsane,

My name is [...]. I am a student at Columbia University's Graduate School of Journalism in New York City. I'm writing an article about earwax and Q-Tips. I read the blog "Regarding the Medicinal Use of the SuperSoaker" and really found some helpful stuff. Can you tell me more about your ear-cleaning habits?

Best,

[...]

Columbia University
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 9:39 AM on February 12, 2007

The author has given me permission to post this.

Nothing earth-shattering, but I thought it was funny. Did anyone else get this?
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 9:39 AM on February 12, 2007

I did not, but I could tell [...] some stories!
posted by OmieWise at 9:45 AM on February 12, 2007

I got an email from him at the start, saying he was going to contact some of the funnier and medically savvy posters.

Did anyone else get this?

I think he's talked to six people so far for the article.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:47 AM on February 12, 2007

But I am neither funny nor medically savvy! I am medically funny though.

Nice of him to contact you first, Matt.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 9:54 AM on February 12, 2007

So, what did you tell him about your ear-cleaning habits?
posted by Roger Dodger at 9:57 AM on February 12, 2007

I told him that I produce a lot of wax (as I said in the relevant thread), that I need to get my ears flushed once every couple of years by a doctor, and that I should probably use oil drops but tend to be a bit lazy. Why? :)
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 10:00 AM on February 12, 2007

I read the blog "Regarding the Medicinal Use of the SuperSoaker"

I always blink at this use of "blog" to refer to "post on a blog". Not that there's anything wrong with that—it just catches my eye. Reads weird to me. Maybe we can get someone at CU to write an article about it.
posted by cortex at 10:23 AM on February 12, 2007

I find using an baby ear syringe and hot water while showering does the trick nicely, gnfti. Have you tried that yourself?
posted by five fresh fish at 10:39 AM on February 12, 2007

I always blink at this use of "blog" to refer to "post on a blog".

Me too. I was momentarily amazed that there were enough medical uses for a super soaker that the subject required a blog. That would've been interesting.
posted by vytae at 10:49 AM on February 12, 2007

This journalist is going to take ear wax cleaning advice over the internet from someone whose handle is 'goodnewsfortheinsane"? Makes my faith in the future generation of jounalists waiver just a little bit. (Not implying anything about gnfti)

Now if the article is about uses for Q-tips, we could have quite a thread.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 11:02 AM on February 12, 2007

Just curious. My wife is a believer in ear candling, but I think her results are about as believable as the Chekov method from Star Trek II: Wrath of Khan.
posted by Roger Dodger at 11:27 AM on February 12, 2007

My wife is a believer in ear candling

I had a number of friends who held the same belief, and as I usually do when I am skeptical of things, consulted the internet. The conclusion? Hooey. Potentially dangerous hooey, at that, as you've got hot wax right next to your ear canal.

I wouldn't bother mentioning this to your wife, as the same sort of people tend to disbelieve evidence found on the internet ("what? like a bunch of strangers on the internet would know ANYTHING about ear candling! If it wasn't true, why would they sell ear candles at the grocery co-op?").
posted by fishfucker at 11:48 AM on February 12, 2007

Until I clicked, I thought "earwaxy" was going to be an interesting new colloquialism for me to learn. Then it turns out the thread is actually about ear wax.
posted by knave at 11:49 AM on February 12, 2007

I tried ear candling a few times, but the wick always made my ear canal itch something awful, and the flame caught my hair on fire every time. It did melt the ear wax, though. Smelled like leftover sushi.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:56 AM on February 12, 2007

I find using an baby ear syringe and hot water while showering does the trick nicely, gnfti. Have you tried that yourself?

That doesn't work for everyone. I have an exceptionally thin eardrum due to 3x tubes and busting it open a few summers ago. Combine that with a pretty thin ear canal, and the ear syringe == further compaction of ear wax and/or a painful eardrum. I've managed to do both.
Now, I have to go to an ear doctor 1-2 times a year where they suction out the wax. Usually, they have to put in some ear drops to loosen it up b/c the wax is so compact.
posted by jmd82 at 11:58 AM on February 12, 2007

Wow, goodnewsfortheinsane, your earwax habits are going to be famous!
posted by textilephile at 1:13 PM on February 12, 2007

I use a blowtorch. Takes the flesh right off my skull, but it works every time!
posted by languagehat at 1:43 PM on February 12, 2007

Earwigs are mining my earwax as we speak. And as an added bonus, they're telling me what to do tomorrow.
posted by soundofsuburbia at 2:43 PM on February 12, 2007 [4 favorites]

soundsofsuburbia, if you write up your method, you can get it on Lifehacker and 43 Folders. The Getting Things Done crowd loves new techniques.
posted by cgc373 at 3:30 PM on February 12, 2007

If you say it in an earwig voice, he probably will.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 3:32 PM on February 12, 2007

cgc373: Yeah, I probably could. It's very Personal Hygiene 2.0 and John Updike is also a fan of the method, so it'll probably fly. Alas, the earwigs shun publicity at the moment and I've probably said too much already. They'll whisper in my ears tonight, for sure. Don't be surprised if tomorrow the news of a swedish man standing on a roof-top shouting "power to the earwigs, all aboard the toe nail aqueduct" will break. Not so much 43 Folders as YTMND. I should probably call my mother now, tell her that whatever happens, I'll always love her.

Oh, one more thing. You should probably invest in jam.
posted by soundofsuburbia at 3:45 PM on February 12, 2007

Fun fact: In swedish an "earwig" is called a "tvestjärt", and that roughly translates into "two butt".
posted by soundofsuburbia at 3:56 PM on February 12, 2007

An earwig, in any language, is best called "MEeeargh!Getitoffmegetitoffme!Waarghalagh!"
posted by five fresh fish at 4:09 PM on February 12, 2007

What's that, my pretties? Paint five fresh fish' nipples blue? But he won't like that... No, no... I can't do that. Magic Marker? Right, but why? No, I'm not arguing. Oh, The Book of Revelation. Probably shoud go with turquoise, then. Now, sleep.
posted by soundofsuburbia at 4:13 PM on February 12, 2007

It's a shame body language can't be conveyed on this intarweb tube. It's not the phonemes so much as the flailing that really speaks to those around oneself.
posted by five fresh fish at 4:16 PM on February 12, 2007

They're already blue, dude. Go paint someone else's nips.
posted by five fresh fish at 4:24 PM on February 12, 2007

I always blink at this use of "blog" to refer to "post on a blog". Not that there's anything wrong with that—it just catches my eye. Reads weird to me.

For once, I agree with you on a usage issue, cortex. [NOT PRESCRIPTIVIST]

I haven't tried the syringe thing, fff, but then it's rarely a problem and when it becomes one, my doc is just a block away from my house and I happen to live in health care paradise.

And yeah, AFAIC, the candling thing is total bull.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 4:25 PM on February 12, 2007

Oh, they've already gotten to you? Great!

And I'm done derailing. Sorry. Way to go gnfti and please post a follow up!
posted by soundofsuburbia at 4:27 PM on February 12, 2007

I know this is a bit of a tangent, but does anyone know if that supersoaker trick will work on a colon? I've been bunged up for days.
posted by breezeway at 6:20 PM on February 12, 2007

breezeway: This is only kinda like a supersoaker, but rest assured it'll drop your bung like nobody's business.
posted by carsonb at 6:59 PM on February 12, 2007

"I know this is a bit of a tangent, but does anyone know if that supersoaker trick will work on a colon?"

A quick trip to Google turns up "Autumn Haze Has A Super Soaker For An Ass".

I didn't pursue that line of inquiry any further. You're welcome to follow it up.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 6:59 PM on February 12, 2007

Holy cow, carsonb, just reading that link did the trick! Thanks.
posted by breezeway at 7:28 PM on February 12, 2007

carsonb, you da man!. Have you just been waiting for the appropriate time to use that link or was that a spur of the moment research thing? 1200 sows an hour!!! I think that is one every 3 seconds.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 9:13 PM on February 12, 2007

Nothing earth-shattering, but I thought it was funny. Did anyone else get this?

Nothing earth-shattering, but I thought it was funny. Did anyone else get this?

There ya go, gnfti!
posted by taz at 10:42 PM on February 12, 2007

Have you just been waiting for the appropriate time to use that link or was that a spur of the moment research thing?

I saw a carcass cutting tools feature on the blue a while back, and the term bung dropper has stuck with me ever since.
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEAT!
posted by carsonb at 4:02 PM on February 13, 2007

My new ear-cleaning bung-dropping technique is unstoppable!
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 5:41 PM on February 13, 2007