Backtagging AskMe and MeFi

January 26, 2006 6:34 AM

Dear Matt, would it be possible to grant a few trusted volunteers enough rights to be able to add tags to the MeFi and AskMe back catalogue?
posted by biffa to feature requests at 6:34 AM (180 comments total)

Obviously with the idea of making it more useful/accessible. (If it's possible I'm happy to volunteer myself but I don't think my profile is such that I don't know if this would be acceptable - i.e. no-one knows me.)
posted by biffa at 6:38 AM on January 26, 2006

Trust me!
posted by smackfu at 7:20 AM on January 26, 2006

People have objected (strenuously) in the past to the idea that their posts might have tags added that they didn't add themselves. I don't feel strongly about that, but it seems like a position worth respecting. Just the other day someone objected to the idea of mandatory tags.
posted by OmieWise at 7:39 AM on January 26, 2006

OmieWise: "Just the other day someone objected to the idea of mandatory tags."

Wow, if someone objects, it's obviously a bad thing.

Mathowie: Should I send everyone party hats?
User A: Yes!
User B: Yes!
Users C-Q: Yes!
User R: No, I am a contrarian.
Mathowie: Okay, no hats. Sorry, someone objected.

posted by Plutor at 8:20 AM on January 26, 2006

Why is user "R" always the bad guy?
posted by R. Mutt at 8:37 AM on January 26, 2006

Tell me about it.
posted by Ryvar at 8:38 AM on January 26, 2006

Mandatory tags : BAD
Magic tagging fairies that work secretly as we sleep: GOOD

Your honor, I rest my case.
posted by blue_beetle at 8:39 AM on January 26, 2006

Yay for tagging fairies!
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 8:44 AM on January 26, 2006

That said, I think magic tagging fairies are good too.
posted by R. Mutt at 8:45 AM on January 26, 2006

Can I be the tagging ogre, surreptitiously stripping posts of crappy tags and replacing them with shiny useful ones?
posted by monju_bosatsu at 8:47 AM on January 26, 2006

monju_bosatsu: "Can I be the tagging ogre, surreptitiously stripping posts of crappy tags and replacing them with shiny useful ones?"

And eating their bones, we can assume?
posted by Plutor at 9:01 AM on January 26, 2006

Absolutely. Fascism tags make the best soup.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 9:09 AM on January 26, 2006

Can I be the tagging ogre, surreptitiously stripping posts of crappy tags and replacing them with shiny useful ones? - monju_bosatsu

What's crappy to you might be useful to someone else.
posted by raedyn at 9:15 AM on January 26, 2006

raedyn: "What's crappy to you might be useful to someone else."

Like ihopeclayaikendoesnthaveabiggerpenisthanmetoo. I just searched for that this morning and thank god something was there.
posted by Plutor at 9:18 AM on January 26, 2006

I've thought about suggesting a "suggest-a-tag" feature a few times, wherein people could fill in a little "suggest a tag for this post" box, but no one could see the suggested tags but the OP, who could choose to add the tags or not, as they please. But it would be a lot of extra work and nobody wants to be told what to do/post/tag, so, nevermind I guess.
posted by Gator at 9:30 AM on January 26, 2006

Plutor -
Obviously I didn't mean to claim that every freakin tag was helpful. But it would be difficult to allow a group to REMOVE someone else's tags, because the OP likely had a reason for putting them there. What does it hurt to have an extra useless tag attached to a post? Nothing. It's more harm to remove a tag that I find useful just because you don't get it.

That said, I do think there's value in allowing others to ADD tags to posts. Just not removing them.
posted by raedyn at 9:44 AM on January 26, 2006

Keep your damned dirty hands off my posts.
posted by xmutex at 9:46 AM on January 26, 2006

Allowing a "trusted" user to tag a post defeats the idea of tags, because it's supposed to be about what the poster thought about the content. People can interpret different meanings or tags for the same content. Why not call them categories and be done with it.
posted by gsb at 9:46 AM on January 26, 2006

I don't understand the fear of having your question tagged by another. MeFi, perhaps there's some concern about being misrepresented, but adding tags to questions would just cut down on duplicate questions and make AskMe better at doing what it does best, helping people find answers to questions.
posted by allen.spaulding at 9:49 AM on January 26, 2006

That said, I do think there's value in allowing others to ADD tags to posts. Just not removing them.

For what it's worth, I agree; I was trying to make an (unfunny) joke while at the same time obliquely complaining about useless tags. In any case, I think the real solution is to let any member tag any post.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 9:57 AM on January 26, 2006

I don't understand the fear of having your question tagged by another.

It'd be abused. Call my cynical, but I predict if we allowed everybody to tag everybody else's posts, we'd see a rash of "tag vandalism," with already-existing grudge-matches being dragged into the tags, or at best a lot of jokes and noise.

This is in addition to the "don't put words in my mouth" idea that a lot of people have against their posts being tagged by anyone but them. I pretty much feel the same way; I think I use good, descriptive tags on my posts and I wouldn't like having anyone else tacking something on that I might not agree with (although I don't mind in the least if someone suggests that I add this tag or that tag that they think would be useful).
posted by Gator at 10:13 AM on January 26, 2006

Allowing a "trusted" user to tag a post defeats the idea of tags, because it's supposed to be about what the poster thought about the content.

This is not true. It's supposed to be about helping people find posts on a given subject. There's nothing wrong with useless tags, which hurt nothing, but there is something wrong about not having useful tags. In other words: what raedyn said.
posted by languagehat at 10:15 AM on January 26, 2006

I agree, this would be a great idea — and let me add, I think someone needs to suggest a tag for all those "help me identify this story" questions. I posted one last week; I browsed through older questions looking for a relevant tag but found none. Something to collect those questions would be nice.
posted by cribcage at 10:27 AM on January 26, 2006

I hate this idea. Maybe tags aren't all that useful if they aren't mandatory and heavily moderated, but for the love of God why have them if they are? If we want a system by which we can search through posts by category and reliably find all posts related to category [x], then tags simply isn't that system. Assigning a group of tag monitors to go around enforcing an imaginary system of searchability is wasteful and unnecessary. Why force a square peg into a round hole? If tags allows too much variation, room for error and allows this dreaded lack of information, then why not find a more suitable system? I don't know what that sytem would be, but it seems pretty obvious that tags isn't suiting whatever you want of it. That being the case, it seems silly to try to fix tags with thousands upon thousands of manhours of work rather than just finding a better system, whatever that may be.

If we MUST do this, however, then I agree with languagehat and raedyn that tags must not be removed. I'll live if someone really wants to put extra tags on my shit, but touch any of MY tags and die.
posted by shmegegge at 10:34 AM on January 26, 2006

Perhaps this muddies the tags semantics, but how about having community tags which can be added or deleted by the community which are separate from the original poster's tags which remain modifiable only by the poster?
posted by ooga_booga at 10:55 AM on January 26, 2006

At dailykos, they let anybody tag any story.
posted by empath at 11:10 AM on January 26, 2006

Here is what I said the last time this came up - tags.metafilter.com. Try not to be too literal minded about those suggestions. The point is that adding keywords to help find posts is a great idea, but we need to have a little debate about each one so that it is applied well, otherwise it won't really help find posts at all.

I was thinking of people picking out keywords which are manageable, like depleted uranium, and then doing the leg work. submitting the new tag and research for discussion, and then adding the tag where appropriate. This wouldn't happen that often, it is too much work, but there are lots of us here to spread it around!

shmegegge: If we want a system by which we can search through posts by category and reliably find all posts related to category [x], then tags simply isn't that system.
...
I don't know what that system would be,

Please don't confuse categories with keywords (or tags). Somebody posted this article yesterday which seems to be similarly confused - Ontology is Overrated: Categories, Links, and Tags. Where content goes in metafilter is already defined, each post is given a post number for easy access from the database. I agree, categories are of limited usefulness here, and it is true that they have crept into metatalk and askmetafilter a little, but it really hasn't got anything to do with the issue at hand in any way.
posted by Chuckles at 11:11 AM on January 26, 2006

I was just about to mention ooga_booga's point, although I don't really see the importance of individual tags at metafilter. I wouldn't say community tags though, moderated tags maybe, something with discipline involved (which is why I like keyword).
posted by Chuckles at 11:14 AM on January 26, 2006

chuckles: wouldn't it be people requesting these tag fairies that are conflating the two? It seems to me like this is inspired by a desire to search for post categories and topics and get better results. My point is precisely that tags are ill suited for that, and therefore forcing them to work in a way they don't through many hours of personal work is unmerited.
posted by shmegegge at 11:22 AM on January 26, 2006

I just want a way to add tags to posts where the original poster didn't care enough to add tags. (Plus the whole pre-tagging era.)
posted by smackfu at 11:25 AM on January 26, 2006

I wouldn't object to having languagehat tag my posts.

But only him, and only in Xhosa.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:29 AM on January 26, 2006

Even more important, the search feature is basically worthless for knowing if your post is a double or not. It would be nice if you could cut and paste your urls and find out for sure.
posted by dgaicun at 11:35 AM on January 26, 2006

And I have no objections to tagging fairies - I think the (anal retentive) costs clearly don't outweigh the benefits.
posted by dgaicun at 11:37 AM on January 26, 2006

You know what would be clever? If the hostname for every link was placed as a tag, automagically. So everytime someone linked to www.cnn.com, it would add a tag of "www.cnn.com", and then you could click on the tag to see all the CNN posts.
posted by smackfu at 11:46 AM on January 26, 2006

Schmegegge, let me put it another way... From the ontology article (originally posted by yz, I couldn't remember before):

Yahoo is saying "We understand better than you how the world is organized, because we are trained professionals. So if you mistakenly think that Books and Literature are entertainment, we'll put a little flag up so we can set you right, but to see those links, you have to 'go' to where they 'are'."

The author is right to criticize the way yahoo did it (does it?), but it is in no way an argument against a disciplined information management scheme. The reason yahoo was wrong is not their training or their professionalism, or their authoritarianism, it is their misunderstanding of what the technology is capable of. The author seems to have a problem with the notion of 'professional' too, I would agree with that as well... But wikipedia has discipline even though it is an amateur effort, why not here...
posted by Chuckles at 11:51 AM on January 26, 2006

smackfu: "...then you could click on the tag to see all the CNN posts."

What idiot would want to do that? You might as well click on the goatse tag.
posted by Plutor at 11:51 AM on January 26, 2006

gsb writes "Allowing a 'trusted' user to tag a post defeats the idea of tags, because it's supposed to be about what the poster thought about the content."

Exactly.

xmutex writes "Keep your damned dirty hands off my posts."

I agree.

If we have to do this the tags added by the tag fairies should be clearly delimited, say by the blink tag.
posted by Mitheral at 12:10 PM on January 26, 2006

Baby_Balrog tagged this post as: obsequious
posted by Baby_Balrog at 12:39 PM on January 26, 2006

You know what would be clever? If the hostname for every link was placed as a tag, automagically. So everytime someone linked to www.cnn.com, it would add a tag of "www.cnn.com", and then you could click on the tag to see all the CNN posts.

So the tag en.wikipedia.org would be entirely worthless
posted by allen.spaulding at 1:18 PM on January 26, 2006

Yay for tagging fairies!

Homophobe.
posted by fochsenhirt at 1:58 PM on January 26, 2006

Homophobe.

Welcome to Metatalk.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 2:03 PM on January 26, 2006

So the tag en.wikipedia.org would be entirely worthless

It would be all the posts that link to the wikipedia. Not worthless at all!
posted by smackfu at 2:04 PM on January 26, 2006

This is something that would be easy to farm out. Hell, Matthowie could let remedial middle schoolers do it for credit if he wanted to. The catch? An already trusted admin should approve every tag that's added to the BT era.
The other catch? Coding this would probably be a fucking nightmare.
posted by klangklangston at 3:09 PM on January 26, 2006

*offers mr_crash_davis the Xhosa tags isibhiqi 'the discharge from a festered wound,' ibhiya 'beer,' isibongo 'praise, poetry,' ubuchula 'nakedness,' ietheethe 'a soft, tender thing,' ivilikitshane 'refuse, rubbish,' and iyakayaka 'a ragged, torn, hanging, disorderly thing' to apply as needed*
posted by languagehat at 3:45 PM on January 26, 2006

What's the Xhosa tag for "a four-foot hyperkinetic rabbitty thing"?
posted by ooga_booga at 3:47 PM on January 26, 2006

bunnyfire?
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 4:03 PM on January 26, 2006

I like the tags in askme plenty good. I used them extensively when searching for previously-asked questions similar to my question.

Note that blag posted a link to a similar question that had no tags, which I had completely missed. I think I would have found it had someone gone back and added tags to it.

And yes, I used both the Google and Yahoo search interfaces to askme to find similar questions, and didn't find it. And my google-fu is usually quite powerful.

Tags in the blue or grey? Never pay much attention to them. But I suppose I would were I to find something truly best-of-the-web, or wanted to make a snarky callout or something.
posted by bigbigdog at 7:44 PM on January 26, 2006

Allowing a "trusted" user to tag a post defeats the idea of tags, because it's supposed to be about what the poster thought about the content.

WTF?? The original poster was able to express what he/she thought about the content of the post long before tags existed. It's called a "comment." Some posters have even expressed what they thought about the content in the post itself, although that tends to be discouraged.

If that's the only point of tags, I fail to see the advantage it has over the poster simply making a comment in the thread.

I was under the impression that tags were supposed to help people find posts on a given topic, not just a place for the original poster to doodle various random thoughts.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 8:51 AM on January 27, 2006

I was actually thinking of this idea for a while. It would be very handy to find posts on certain topics (and hey, would be nice to have a "WhatDoIDoWithMyLife" tag since those posts come up so often and make for interesting reading...)
posted by divabat at 5:46 AM on January 28, 2006

I baked this really good cake for your birthday IIHAA. I just tried a little piece and it was excellent, but maybe could have used a bit more sugar. No, I tried another piece and it may need more chocolate. No, that's OK, let's see, flour is ok and so are the eggs, this piece I am having now is light and perfect. Might be the frosting, I'll just try this last chunk. Yes, it was perfect. I should have saved some for you. It is late now, too late to make another cake. You can have gnfti's warm muffins.
Happy Birthday anyway.
posted by Cranberry at 1:36 AM on January 31, 2006

I'm so sorry to have missed Cran's cake. Maybe I'll have to bake cookies or something.
posted by raedyn at 6:24 AM on January 31, 2006

*goes digging in desk for chocolate chips*
posted by raedyn at 6:24 AM on January 31, 2006

Here, raedyn, use these. I have had them since I decided not to make another batch of fudge at Christmas, but I am sure they are still good.
posted by Cranberry at 1:59 PM on January 31, 2006

*brightens*
posted by raedyn at 2:09 PM on January 31, 2006

Whew, a 111 thread! Feels racy.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 2:14 PM on January 31, 2006

It's the thought that counts, Cranberry. If I may be so bold, I'd love a piece after you're through with it. That stuff amazes me.

Thanks all for the wishes!!
posted by If I Had An Anus at 2:16 PM on January 31, 2006

Did we make this comment?
posted by If I Had An Anus at 6:11 AM on February 2, 2006

Do I have the right to tag your comments yet, IIHAA? That's all I care about at the moment. (Well, that and fudge.)
posted by OmieWise at 6:36 AM on February 2, 2006

What's the kids say over at MetaFilter? Oh yeah: I can't tell whether you're an idiot or being willfully obtuse.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 6:54 AM on February 2, 2006

that, that. I meant that. Asshat.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 6:54 AM on February 2, 2006

I mean, I didn't actually mean that. I meant I left off `that`. Jeez, I'm under a lot pressure right now, ok? Is that clear enough?
posted by If I Had An Anus at 7:03 AM on February 2, 2006

posted by OmieWise at 7:04 AM on February 2, 2006

Is there something you want to talk about? I'm a trained therapist you know, and I'll tell you the same thing I tell all my patients: "It's better to look good than to feel good."
posted by OmieWise at 7:06 AM on February 2, 2006

Edgar Winter is hawt.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 7:14 AM on February 2, 2006

Guys, would you mind keeping it down? I'm trying to sleep in here.
posted by Plutor at 7:21 AM on February 2, 2006

Will you be waking up on the lawn? Shall I get the hose?
posted by If I Had An Anus at 7:43 AM on February 2, 2006

Plutor, I haven't forgotten this little gem from this very thread. It earned my undying enmity, sir, my undying enmity. It also has earned my pastiche of a William Carlos Williams poem, which will be the only punishment I will dole out, and in fact, represents an end to my enmity (which doesn't turn out to be as undying as all that), since I had, in fact, completely forgotten about it before coming into this thread again to wake you up:

Your dismissal of my cogent point,
so carefully constructed
and almost unsourced,
hurt my feelings.

I did not mean to say something
which I would later regret
after it had been mocked,
and I hope you do not mind if I wake you
now
in order to put your ass in my red wheelbarrow
and stuff you in my 'fridge.
posted by OmieWise at 8:03 AM on February 2, 2006

I propose a new policy: every argument needs to be presented in the form of a slightly-modified obscure poem.

"Oh the MetaFilter Poster is a curious cat
And there's no need for you to doubt it;
For he will do
As he do do
And there's no doing anything about it."

Yeah, yeah, it's not that obscure, nor all that modified. You win this round, OmieWise!
posted by Plutor at 8:57 AM on February 2, 2006

Hey, where is everybody? Is there a party somewhere else that I wasn't invited to?

Hello?

Hello?

cranberry? raedyn? Dano? gnfti? Everybody?
posted by Nice Donkey at 9:29 AM on February 4, 2006

Hi Nice Donkey! 14 hours later. It has been pretty quiet here.
posted by Cranberry at 11:48 PM on February 4, 2006

Yeah. Maybe people are watching the Superbowl. I wonder why.
posted by Nice Donkey at 4:41 PM on February 5, 2006

Seattle fans are wondering.
posted by Cranberry at 11:05 PM on February 5, 2006

Would someone please tell ND¢ that he won this thread?
posted by Cranberry at 12:09 PM on February 6, 2006

I'm about to trade in my winnings in this thread for their 1/20¢ cash value.

Hey, isn't the The Hague Thread? And g-daddy hasn't made it in off the longboat yet!? He must be busy rolling his eyes at my goin' dutch joke along with the other Unamericans.

Dammit, gnfti, where is my free weed? You're fucking everything straight out the winda.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 7:34 PM on February 6, 2006

You want to win the election in 1996? Change your attitude at the Waco Hearings. Please, if you want me to beg for the good of our country.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 7:43 PM on February 6, 2006

I've just had nothing to say, that's all.
posted by OmieWise at 10:44 AM on February 7, 2006

The past week I've been busy at work training my replacement (I didn't get an interview for the permanent posting of the job I've been doing for a year) and it's really cramped my style. Sorry, guys.
posted by raedyn at 10:51 AM on February 7, 2006

Training your replacement is ugly raedyn, at least if you wanted to keep that job. So, you can move on to bigger and better (paid)?
I have been busy too, and just got around to reading the thread about MeFi being US-centric. Is that why we have seen so little of gnifti?
posted by Cranberry at 11:37 AM on February 7, 2006

What OmieWise said.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 12:37 PM on February 7, 2006

Wanna point me to that thread, Cranberry?
posted by raedyn at 2:07 PM on February 7, 2006

raedyn, it's this one.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 2:51 PM on February 7, 2006

Oh, man, raedyn, that sucks. And it doesn't suck in a good way, like when there are sugarcubes involved. Is the new person permanent? No, wait, don't answer that. That sucks.
posted by Nice Donkey at 7:11 PM on February 7, 2006

Yeah, raedyn, those some seriously uncool —and dumbass— imployers you got there.

Omie and gnfti ... that weak-ass shit may fly over in the blue, but c'mon, having nothing to say is what this is all about.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 7:18 PM on February 7, 2006

Actually, the one I read was in the blue
posted by Cranberry at 9:43 PM on February 7, 2006

the Rita Verdonck
posted by Cranberry at 9:45 PM on February 7, 2006

I cannot make the link work and I am being hassled here.
Later.
posted by Cranberry at 9:46 PM on February 7, 2006

Verdonk


posted by Cranberry at 10:38 PM on February 7, 2006

raedyn, that sucks, I'm sorry.

Cran - right you are, and here you go.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 5:34 AM on February 8, 2006

posted by OmieWise at 6:51 AM on February 8, 2006

That ain't nothin'!
posted by OmieWise at 6:51 AM on February 8, 2006

Short story on why the job situation worked out this way: we're unionized, and my 1.5 years senority isn't sufficient to get me this position (it's the kind of place people stay their whole career). It's kind of a bummer, but that's just how it is. I guess there must be a better job waiting for me out there somewhere, I just have to go find it.
posted by raedyn at 7:24 AM on February 8, 2006

I'm sorry, that's really sucky. I am sure that there is something better out there, though.
posted by OmieWise at 7:37 AM on February 8, 2006

Something better change:


posted by OmieWise at 7:39 AM on February 8, 2006

So sorry raedyn. Maybe seniority is the one bright facet of getting old!
posted by Cranberry at 11:08 AM on February 8, 2006

Well we knew there had to be something to look forward to.

heh.
posted by raedyn at 1:51 PM on February 8, 2006

*hides in shadows, watches raedyn pitch tent*
posted by If I Had An Anus at 2:03 PM on February 8, 2006

*sees IIHAA stalking raedyn, calls RCMP*
posted by Cranberry at 11:32 PM on February 8, 2006

*munches on a veggie dog*
posted by raedyn at 7:43 AM on February 9, 2006

Here Veggie, Here Veggie. *whistles*
Wonder why Veggie isn't answering.
posted by Cranberry at 2:44 PM on February 9, 2006

*looks down at snack, horrified*
posted by raedyn at 7:41 PM on February 9, 2006

*sells Veggie's collar on ebay*
posted by Cranberry at 11:41 PM on February 9, 2006

I'm taking my oar, and I'm going to The Netherlands and Belgium. I'll be back in a week. Be safe, be well, have fun!
posted by OmieWise at 12:55 PM on February 10, 2006

You too, Mr. Wise. Be safe.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 1:15 PM on February 10, 2006

Give gnifti a good hearty viking handshake for us, will ya?
posted by raedyn at 1:36 PM on February 10, 2006

Bon voyage, OmieWise. Take your camera and see if you can put together a meet with all those Netherlanders. We expect a shout out to the longboat from you and gnfti.
posted by Cranberry at 4:40 PM on February 10, 2006

posted by If I Had An Anus at 9:37 PM on February 10, 2006

Almost 48 hours. Must I save us once again?


posted by gramschmidt at 8:06 PM on February 12, 2006

posted by gramschmidt at 8:12 PM on February 12, 2006

posted by gramschmidt at 8:17 PM on February 12, 2006

*buys huge block of marble, chips away all parts that don't look like gramschmidt*
posted by Cranberry at 10:45 PM on February 12, 2006

*collects Cranberry's marble chips and constructs an inverse, bizarro gramschmidt*

Scary! Run!
posted by Nice Donkey at 4:54 PM on February 13, 2006

I am not leaving until somebody puts a nice bronze "hero who saved the thread" plaque on the statue. On both statues!
posted by Cranberry at 5:00 PM on February 13, 2006

leftover chips can surface the path to the shrine.
posted by Cranberry at 5:01 PM on February 13, 2006

*starts chanting to the inspired wonderfullness of the shrine*

oooooooooooooommmmmmmmmm............
*breath*
ooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmm.............
*breath*
oooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm............
*breath*
oooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmm.............
posted by raedyn at 6:10 PM on February 13, 2006

I am thoroughly disturbed and mildly aroused.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 8:07 AM on February 14, 2006

*carries OmieWise on back to gram's shrine, bearing gifts of sugarcubes*

nevermind that Omie's in The Netherlands and/or Belgium
posted by Nice Donkey at 11:25 AM on February 14, 2006

*carries large oxygen tank to raedyn*
(*steals sugarcube*)
*wonders if OmieWise or gramshrine is affecting gnfti*
posted by Cranberry at 8:31 PM on February 14, 2006

♥ for anyone who did not get a Valentine today
posted by Cranberry at 8:35 PM on February 14, 2006

♥ for anyone who did not get Ovaltine today
posted by If I Had An Anus at 10:33 AM on February 15, 2006

ATTENTION LONGBOATERS. Your beloved OmieWise was captured and briefly held hostage in The Hague. He was released after consuming some Belgian beers and producing a shout-out, and now appears to be merrily on his way towards Amsterdam.


It reads "Longboat Viking Crew - dano/IIHAA, Nice Donkey, Cranberry, raedyn", and finally, the cryptic "all the other stalwart hearties", which appears to be some sort of code for the name "gramschmidt".
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 1:14 PM on February 15, 2006

Well done, OmieWise. Where is gnfti? Are not all who attend a meet supposed to be pictured?
*drinks Ovaltine*
posted by Cranberry at 1:49 PM on February 15, 2006

Yeah, I'm on Omie's pictures - not sure when he'll have time to unload/upload them. They will appear eventually. Until then, I'm a 19-year old schoolgirl wearing clogs and a Goatse t-shirt.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 2:00 PM on February 15, 2006

Um, did drinking Ovaltine cause this fundamental change in you gnfti?
*spits out Ovaltine*
posted by Cranberry at 2:03 PM on February 15, 2006

Nah, it was the Belgian beers. They, um, went south. ;)
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 2:06 PM on February 15, 2006

Whew! I'm feeling pride and jealousy all at once!

I'm a 19-year old schoolgirl wearing clogs and a Goatse t-shirt.
Oh, and here's comes lust. Only four more to go!
posted by If I Had An Anus at 2:27 PM on February 15, 2006

Next time we migrate, shall we ask Nissan for the loan of a few Terranauts?
posted by Cranberry at 2:52 PM on February 15, 2006

Wow, completely ignored by Omie-come-lately. This is proof that he just skimmed the rich 9622v2 literature before writing his essay, rather than reading for comprehension and synthesis like the teacher said to.
posted by gramschmidt at 11:22 PM on February 15, 2006

posted by gramschmidt at 11:23 PM on February 15, 2006

Perhaps Omie thought your marble statue was recognition enough. He surely wouldn't want to spoil you.
*music swells in the background- Johnny Mathis singing Unforgettable* (erm, maybe Nat King Cole?)
posted by Cranberry at 12:23 AM on February 16, 2006

Wow. Those happy faces look very unhappy.
posted by raedyn at 8:30 AM on February 16, 2006

OmieWise forgot them.
posted by Cranberry at 12:03 PM on February 16, 2006

Hey, in fairness, I have at least partial responsibility for OmitWise's shouting-out mishap. We were just so eager to tout the shout that we forgot to cram gram onto the boat note we wrote. Surely it's no reason for a rift in our raft?

I'm sure Mr. Wise will resurface soon, bringing reconciliation gifts in the form of copious amounts of Dutch ganja for all. And a couple of those cutesy little porcelain windmills, which I despise with a passion. I expect everyone to throw them overboard at the earliest opportunity. Or regift them, whatever. Just don't buy them, is all. I'll stop now.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 12:37 PM on February 16, 2006

gnfti nails it, can't we all just get a bong?



gnob a teg tsuj lla ew t'nac, ti slian itfng?
posted by If I Had An Anus at 1:28 PM on February 16, 2006

*waves to gnfti. puts wooden shoe full of porcelain windmills into Willamette river*
posted by Cranberry at 3:23 PM on February 16, 2006

Ah, the Willamette. Having never been anywhere near it, its name always reminds me of this (text at bottom of page).

I have a friend in Portland (besides you, dearest berry-belly), and when she was in Amsterdam (we were hanging out and I was showing her around) I remember her quizzing me about what I knew about Portland. (We were doing this kind of "what do we know about each other's home areas" thing.) I kind of stumbled and muttered something like "uhh... I know it lies on a river, I think it's called the Will-i-a-mette?"

This made her laugh. A few months later she sent me a photo she took of this stone (not the one linked, obviously - hers was a print and I don't have a scanner around), and added: "See! No 'i'!"

Despite being an all-round geek and a reasonable history nut, I had never heard about the War Relocation Camps in the U.S. Pacific Northwest; blame my West-European background I guess, we had enough war stories of our own. (And perhaps victor's justice: that part of the story wasn't in *my* school's history books, for sure.)

Apt as that photo was as an illustration of my silly mispronunciation, looking at it again after learning about that part of history it somehow hits me somewhere very deep. I can't quite put my finger on what it is about it, perhaps the newness and inherent exoticness of such a human story from *inside* the U.S., when me and my generation have been bombarded with all *our* stories about WWII. Or maybe it's because it is, in a direct sense, about language, something that has fascinated me for as long as I can remember. Or maybe it's that it's such a succinct and simple and earnest glimpse into the life of someone who has left his home country and has to start life all over again in a completely alien place. I don't know.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 4:43 PM on February 16, 2006

the War Relocation Camps in the U.S. Pacific Northwest

Well, relocation *from* there among other places, if I understand it right; but you catch my drift.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 4:46 PM on February 16, 2006

What has always struck me about the encampment of Americans of Japanese ancestry is that there was no movement to round up Americans of German ancestry.
Perhaps because there were so many? Perhaps because they "look like us"?
Recent features in The Oregonian (newspaper) have recounted the huge losses people suffered. There was little or no redress for businesses and homes that they were forced to abandon. Of course there was no possibility of replacing the days and weeks of their lives that were gone forever.
When you finish your brain studies and get to Portland on your world tour, you can amaze the locals by pronouncing the Will-AM-ette river correctly. Hardly any non-residents get it right.
posted by Cranberry at 11:04 PM on February 16, 2006

Heh. Inspired by this thread, I'm trying to convince my friend to sign up. Seemed like a good time to re-read the Guidelines. This passage now seems quaint:

As a first-time poster or new member of MetaFilter, take a look at the older posts to get a feel for what constitutes a good link. Look at the links that carry 10 or 20 comments to see what everyone is talking about.

posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 7:27 AM on February 18, 2006

Well, the 20 comment threads are usually better links than the 200 comment ones.
posted by raedyn at 7:41 AM on February 18, 2006

Is the ability to figure out how to use PayPal sufficent for membership? Should Mathowie implement an entrance exam for prospective mefites? Something like read every word of 9622v2, then answer 100 questions the last of which will be a 500 word essay.
posted by Cranberry at 1:58 PM on February 18, 2006

Yes. However, that's prospective longboaters, not prospective Mefites, and then, the bar for entry seems to be lower if you just buy us a lot of beer.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 5:39 PM on February 19, 2006

Not just longboaters! A triage, if you will, to select those with the stamina and the time to read pages of print.
posted by Cranberry at 1:18 PM on February 20, 2006

Well, I'm back, and let me tell you that gnfti looks great in a t-shirt! It was a great trip, and great to have an impromptu Hague meetup, although the two of us together did not have enough wherewithal (or enough time) to dirnk enough beer to get really rowdy.

gramschmidt--I couldn't be more sorry about forgetting to add your name, I'll just row for awhile by myself, shall I? Think of it this way: you loom so large on the boat that you can only be represented by the plural "stalwart hearties."

Oh, and here's your windmill:


posted by OmieWise at 8:22 AM on February 21, 2006

gnfti holding the shoutout:


posted by OmieWise at 8:43 AM on February 21, 2006

And with the artwork...again, gnfti:


posted by OmieWise at 8:44 AM on February 21, 2006

Lovely.
posted by raedyn at 8:46 AM on February 21, 2006

Hey! Welcome back¹, OmieWise!

¹ I understand that this statement is inherently ironic.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 9:16 AM on February 21, 2006

Baby-face!
posted by If I Had An Anus at 9:24 AM on February 21, 2006 [1 favorite]

Baby Face,
You've got the cutest little baby face
There's not another who can take your place,
Baby Face,
My heart, poor heart is thumpin'
You sure have started somethin'
(B. Davis - H. Akst)

Thanks for the shout out gnfti and OmieWise
OmieWise, were you forced to purchase that windmill by jack-booted wooden shod border guards?
posted by Cranberry at 11:33 AM on February 21, 2006 [1 favorite]

I was too stoned to notice who made me buy it.
posted by OmieWise at 12:16 PM on February 21, 2006

George Washington is 274 today, February 22 . He was the first person elected president in world history.

Edna Saint Vincent Millay is 114 today. She wrote as she lived:
"My candle burns at both ends
It will not last the night.
But ah, my foes and oh, my friends
It gives a lovely light.

Edward Gorey is 81 today. There are many examples of his macabre humor - make that humour - he drew the introduction to the PBS-TV show Mystery Theater.

Can any conclusions be drawn from the coincidence of birth date of these disparate people?
posted by Cranberry at 12:19 AM on February 22, 2006

Cranberry writes "He was the first person elected president in world history. "

Holy shit, I had no idea that this was true. I'd never thought about it, but it's crazy to contemplate.
posted by OmieWise at 7:25 AM on February 22, 2006

*draws conclusion*

posted by If I Had An Anus at 8:05 AM on February 22, 2006

George Washington is 274 today
Edna Saint Vincent Millay is 114 today
Edward Gorey is 81 today

I conclude that aliens must invade the earth every February 22nd and inhabit the bodies of a lucky few, who then live to be much older than ordinary humans. Either that, or those born on February 22nd are somehow endowed with a love of raw foods and juicing. Then again, it's probably sunspots.
posted by Nice Donkey at 11:34 AM on February 22, 2006

I think you may have discovered the cause, Nice Donkey. I suspect that those elderly citizens have gathered in the town of George, Washington which recently experienced a spurt of population growth and is now reckoned at 600.
Hard to guess what the locals make of Edward and his morbid comics, but I'll bet they keep an eye out for George around the cherry orchards.
If there are a lot of fires there, we will know it is Edna and her reckless candles.
posted by Cranberry at 12:45 PM on February 22, 2006

FOKKE & SUKKE finally experience something
'Woo!'
'Content!'


FOKKE & SUKKE prefer taking care of some things F2F
'Are you [e-mail]?'
'That was not such a nice comment you posted the other day, huh?'


FOKKE & SUKKE are avid bloggers
'Do I have to hear it from your *blog* that you lied about doing the dishes last night?!?'


FOKKE & SUKKE cannot be fooled
'60% of all bloggers is female...'
'...or *pretends* to be...'
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 1:38 PM on February 22, 2006

That's what I get for hotlinking, I guess. *sigh*
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 1:50 PM on February 22, 2006

I wish more of those came through. gnfti gave me a fokke and sukke book when I was at the meetup (I insist on calling it that, even though it was just the two of us), and it's hilarious.
posted by OmieWise at 1:51 PM on February 22, 2006

Take two:


FOKKE & SUKKE finally experience something
'Woo!'
'Content!'


FOKKE & SUKKE prefer taking care of some things F2F
'Are you [e-mail]?'
'That was not such a nice comment you posted the other day, huh?'


FOKKE & SUKKE are avid bloggers
'Do I have to hear it from your *blog* that you lied about doing the dishes last night?!?'


FOKKE & SUKKE cannot be fooled
'60% of all bloggers is female...'
'...or *pretends* to be...'


FOKKE & SUKKE always have something to say
'"Today I posted something on my blog again..."'
'You're on a roll!'


FOKKE & SUKKE are ahead of their time
'Fokke! Someone has downloaded my RSS script!!'
'Yeah. And it's totally broken.'
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 2:00 PM on February 22, 2006

Does this work, Omie? I posted the images to my server, and I can't view them from inside my router (loopback issue).
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 2:02 PM on February 22, 2006

Lordy! What just happened in here?
posted by Nice Donkey at 2:56 PM on February 22, 2006

Relax, ND, we're only enjoying some good old Fokke & Sukke.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 3:14 PM on February 22, 2006

eeew. Is that Dutch all over everything?
*gets a broom, hands ND a mop*
posted by Cranberry at 12:08 AM on February 23, 2006

*smiles contentedly at seeing tradtional gender roles reaffirmed*
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 5:43 AM on February 23, 2006

Web 2.0.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 8:32 AM on February 23, 2006

Simply put, our results show that Kansas is considerably flatter than a pancake.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 11:58 AM on February 23, 2006

In the thread about Volkswagen ads;

"There needs to be more ads with a trebuchet in them.
posted by mathowie at 1:22 PM PST on February 23 [!]"

What can we do to please Number 1?
posted by Cranberry at 1:35 PM on February 23, 2006

Simply put, our results show that Kansas is considerably flatter than a pancake.

Not to mention, it's the center of the unigoogleverse.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 3:28 PM on February 23, 2006

Geography note for non-natives: Kansas is a Great Plains state. Most of the center of the US is pretty flat.
Should we click our red sequined shoes together just like the wizard said and go to Kansas for pancakes?
posted by Cranberry at 1:11 AM on February 24, 2006

Maybe then the witch will give our friend an Anus!
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 4:19 AM on February 24, 2006

Unlikely. Haven't you heard?
"Ding dong! the witch is dead. which old witch? the wicked witch!
Ding dong! the wicked witch is dead."
posted by Cranberry at 2:36 PM on February 24, 2006

it feels like all I've been doing on this board lately is sticking up for Spoont. And I kind of miss the old board. Or even this board, but for the like first month after it started when the only people who posted were like the Olney kids.

Anyway. I say we start a fun game like how the anus game used to be.

okay....Movies...
posted by If I Had An Anus at 8:40 PM on February 24, 2006

Is there a difference between obsession and monomania?
posted by Cranberry at 10:41 PM on February 24, 2006

January 26 - February 26 = doomsday is coming
11138 + 101 = 11239 closed
11138 + 202 = 11340 closed
11138 + 303 = weird error message.

So, do we migrate proudly by swimming or rowing the longboat (could someone help OmieWise? He has been rowing alone ever since he forgot gramschmidt.)
Should we visit the International House of Pancakes-like flatness and take the gospel of tolerance to Kansas?
If the last option, please pack several Sharpies in case there is an occasion for picketing.
posted by Cranberry at 2:32 PM on February 25, 2006

11240 is open until March 6th.
posted by Cranberry at 2:35 PM on February 25, 2006

Quite a quandry, Cranberry, though Kansas is an excellent idea. I hear it is lovely in Sharpie season. It's landlocked nature will, of course, require travel by trebuchet so a short hop on 11240 for packing and calculations is probably in order. Kansas is relatively large but I believe even a slight error in trajectory could land us in Cheney's home state, which is a risk I am unwilling to face in these uncertain times.

I would like, however, for us to consider making our short stopover in 11225 rather than 11240, so that we may pay our respects. Although he never played a Viking on TV, I've always kind of thought that Don stroked the longboat in his heart. He could take over a few strokes for Omie the Accursed, much as Elijah drinks the Hebrews' wine at Pesach.

We would only lose two days of travel if we took this detour. But whichever thread we choose, I will bring great quantities ginseng as I find it helpful both with packin' and with calculatin'.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 10:17 PM on February 25, 2006

I do not get the connection between Don Knotts - if that who Don is in your comment - and 11225 which is a thread expressing prurient interest in the lives of anonymous posters. It is really quite funny.
posted by Cranberry at 12:12 AM on February 26, 2006

It is late and you all know I meant "that IS who Don is".
posted by Cranberry at 12:13 AM on February 26, 2006

Ginseng reminds me of the Chief, Robert Parish of the Celitcs. He took a bunch of stuff and played until he was 43.
If memory serves, not all of the stuff was ginseng.
posted by Cranberry at 12:19 AM on February 26, 2006

Well, the title attribute on the link says 'don having entered valhalla feb. 25'.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 5:11 AM on February 26, 2006