from a comfortable turret

You're a junior in a liberal arts program and you think you've got a career? 35 years after having had a vasectomy, you want children? Have you picked up a new trophy wife, or something, HuronBob? Wow, someone's got his panties in a knot over this. I guess we hit some sort of nerve. Maybe, but maybe you could be a little nicer Hildegarde
posted by The Jesse Helms to etiquette/policy at 8:23 AM (18 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

I don't even see some of the comments you are talking about. Can you make a little more sense about why this needs to be in MeTa instead of a being a MeMail to a user or to us? Please?
posted by jessamyn at 8:27 AM on April 8

Links, or it never happened.
Related.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:29 AM on April 8 [1 favorite]

Why are you cherry picking old garbage?
posted by Burhanistan at 8:34 AM on April 8

I think we should have a day, one day, where everyone puts all their grudges out on the table. 24 hours of Metatalk grudges. After 24 hours, the threads are closed and deleted, and everybody gets a completely brand new day from that point forward. Of course, this will render some users completely mute, as it seems there are those who love nothing better than digging up old, tired shit, but I think their loss will only be our gain.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:38 AM on April 8 [9 favorites]

You're a junior in a liberal arts program and you think you've got a career?

35 years after having had a vasectomy, you want children? Have you picked up a new trophy wife, or something, HuronBob?

Wow, someone's got his panties in a knot over this. I guess we hit some sort of nerve.

#1 is a joke, from yesterday.
#2 is slighty rude, and it's from January.
#3 uses a phrase that some people don't like, but it's hardly rude, and it's from December.

What is the point of calling out people who say 3 objectionable things every 5 months?
posted by 23skidoo at 8:40 AM on April 8

Plus, from reading Hildegarde's blog, she seems to be in the the process of cancer treatment so maybe cut her some slack if she snipes at drama queens here?
posted by Burhanistan at 8:40 AM on April 8 [6 favorites]

Yeah, I'm really not seeing what's up here. That "panties in a knot" quote is from METATALK (a 444 comment MeTa) where it's totally okay to say things like that. It was also from December. The trophy wife comment was from January and the first quote seems pretty tame even for MetaFilter. Snarky not abusive.

This was something that came up in another MeTa this week. Cherrypicking a user's old comments just to prove some sort of point about them [unless you're refuting someone's "I never said that!" argument] is generally sort of distasteful. While I think we have to own the words we type here, it's also acceptable to change your mind, alter/adjust your opinion, or just decide your presentation left something to be desired. You should be able to do that without someone saying "Oh yeah but you said THIS five months ago"

If Hildegarde was showing a pattern of being abusive or annoying or over the top snarky without having made any other comments, I'd definitely be all for saying she should tone it down some, but I'm not seeing that here. If you have an argument to that effect, I'd love more in the way of explanation.
posted by jessamyn at 8:43 AM on April 8 [1 favorite]

The Jesse Pwned
posted by scabrous at 8:44 AM on April 8 [1 favorite]

Three kinda mean/snarky/jokey comments over a five-month period? This is the best example of bad behavior you could find?
posted by rtha at 8:44 AM on April 8

Yeah, I'm pretty stumped by this. I'm pretty sure I've dropped more and worse shit than this in the last five months. Why does this need a public callout?
posted by cortex at 8:45 AM on April 8

I think I was more objectionable and rude before I even made it down the stairs this morning.
posted by docpops at 8:46 AM on April 8 [2 favorites]

Maybe, but maybe you could be a little nicer Hildegarde

After like 10 seconds of bloodhounding, it looks like you don't like the "You're a junior in a liberal arts program and you think you've got a career?" comment in the thread you started, so you went a-hunting for proof that the person who made that comment is some sort of serial jerk, but came up waaaaay short.

Boohoo, someone made jokes about liberal arts majors in the thread you started. I'm guessing you're a liberal arts major yourself. Looks like ~~someone's got their panties in a knot~~ someone's should've used mefimail.
posted by 23skidoo at 8:47 AM on April 8 [2 favorites]

Hildegarde must be stopped before she comments again.
posted by iconomy at 8:47 AM on April 8

maybe cut her some slack if she snipes at drama queens

I think it's some pretty weak, but using things read on someone's blog to defend or justify their actions or behavior on MeFi is as inappropriate as using them to attack, IMO.
'...drama queens', Burhanistan?
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:47 AM on April 8

D'oh, "I think it's some pretty weak snark..."
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:48 AM on April 8

After 24 hours, the threads are closed and deleted, and everybody gets a completely brand new day from that point forward.

Damn it, where's the Brand New Day image... come back fandango_matt!
posted by ALongDecember at 8:52 AM on April 8

but using things read on someone's blog to defend or justify their actions or behavior on MeFi is as inappropriate as using them to attack, IMO.

Actually, usually that's okay if all you're saying is "hey cut them a little slack" as in this case. People going over the top is still against the rules but if they're just pricklier than normal and there may be a reason, that's sort of a lot of why the site has moderators and MeTa instead of comment-deleting/editing/banning robots with laser precision. Everyone here (almost everyone?) has a life outside of MeFi and there's often sloppy overlap. I'm going to close this up, I don't understand what is doing here.
posted by jessamyn at 8:54 AM on April 8 [2 favorites]

from a comfortable turret April 8, 2008 8:23 AM Subscribe

from a comfortable turret
April 8, 2008 8:23 AM Subscribe