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January 23, 2009 11:36 AM   Subscribe

Has mathowie considered auctioning off early user numbers never/no longer in use?
posted by plexi to MetaFilter-Related at 11:36 AM (116 comments total)

No, we need those for the escape pods.
posted by cortex (staff) at 11:37 AM on January 23, 2009 [2 favorites]


We will save them for exchange for things we need more than money.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:38 AM on January 23, 2009


I got an extra kidney.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 11:38 AM on January 23, 2009


The last thing we need is the nuevo número acting like they own the joint.
posted by dawson at 11:40 AM on January 23, 2009


Wouldn't buying one of those be like getting a fake designer bag just so people will think you can actually afford the real thing and thus respect your status? And does either application actually work?
posted by katillathehun at 11:40 AM on January 23, 2009 [4 favorites]


What do you need that we don't already give? :(
posted by cowbellemoo at 11:41 AM on January 23, 2009


I am better than so many of you, but sadly not all of you.
posted by chunking express at 11:42 AM on January 23, 2009


I would pay dearly for ross' user number. Hell, ross appears to have never used the thing anyway.
posted by owtytrof at 11:44 AM on January 23, 2009


If anyone sends me $10 USD and an SASE, I will mail them a note saying 'You are a tool' which is almost the same thing.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:49 AM on January 23, 2009 [30 favorites]


Just have your user name be "User 23" or "Low Number".
posted by piratebowling at 11:50 AM on January 23, 2009 [2 favorites]


I did an ebay auction long ago for user number 8. It got up to $135 I think, but this was when signups were mostly closed.

Someone did it again a couple years later (and got about $50), and I realized if people want an account that badly, I might as well kill the mefi account resale market by undercutting them with a simple one-time $5 signup.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 11:52 AM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


You should totally do this, and shortly thereafter make it impossible to see user numbers.
posted by smackfu at 11:53 AM on January 23, 2009 [32 favorites]


For years I cursed the sob who took my name and never used the account. Now I see he popped in for a year or so and got some mileage out of AskMe. At least there's that, and the anger wanes.
posted by carsonb at 11:55 AM on January 23, 2009


$5 for the first account and then charge $N to subtract N from the UID.
posted by DU at 11:56 AM on January 23, 2009 [4 favorites]


I am not a number — I am a free man!
posted by electroboy at 12:00 PM on January 23, 2009


then charge $N to subtract N from the UID.

tug hard, I hear they don't come out easily.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 12:01 PM on January 23, 2009 [35 favorites]


If anybody wants to buy mine, they'd get a 4, 7, 5, and two 8's! Only charging $25 per number, and I'll even throw in the 2nd 8 for FREE! Who's buying?
posted by iamkimiam at 12:05 PM on January 23, 2009


Let's go further. Matt should pay me to take a negative number.
posted by allen.spaulding at 12:08 PM on January 23, 2009 [3 favorites]


I second smackfu's suggestion
posted by edgeways at 12:13 PM on January 23, 2009


For years I cursed the sob who took my name and never used the account.

True story--when I joined, dhoyt had already taken my name for one of his sockpuppets.
posted by y2karl at 12:15 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


I would seriously donate 20 dollars to get the user number of 42042042042042042069
posted by Damn That Television at 12:15 PM on January 23, 2009


In this situation, a savvy business owner would charge high number users a modest fee to buy low numbers. This would of course upset the low number users, but the business owner could then offer to charge the old low number users a fee to buy ridiculously high user numbers. He could next extend the same offer to new low number users, repeating the process until all of the users are flat broke.

There's even a book which describes the business plan.
posted by burnmp3s at 12:19 PM on January 23, 2009


I'll pay someone to take my user name.
posted by gman at 12:22 PM on January 23, 2009


What do you think those are, plexi? Rhode Island license plates or something?
posted by stagewhisper at 12:22 PM on January 23, 2009


Sounds alot like backdating stock options.
posted by R. Mutt at 12:23 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


For years I cursed the sob who took my name and never used the account

Yeah, some son of a bitch took my name, too, though to judge by his profile pic he's nowhere near as handsome as I am, so that makes me feel a little better.
posted by Navelgazer at 12:28 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


Of course. An early user number is a fucking valuable thing; you just don't give it away for nothing.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 12:29 PM on January 23, 2009 [6 favorites]


I would seriously donate 20 dollars to get the user number of 42042042042042042069

MORE LIKE 737427456 SUCKER
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 12:34 PM on January 23, 2009


I am not a number — I am a free man!

Hear hear, user 18918!
posted by nanojath at 12:44 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


Also, I doubt these would have that much value in the post-open-signup world. Anybody well-acquainted enough with this place to care would be well aware that having a "paid-for" low user number would pretty much equate to constant shaming.
posted by nanojath at 12:47 PM on January 23, 2009


I am not a number — I am a free man!

There's nothing free about $5.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 12:49 PM on January 23, 2009


I'm looking into the possibility that I can get my username sponsored by Korean Beer and/or Tampons.
posted by ob at 12:50 PM on January 23, 2009


4815162342
posted by y2karl at 12:52 PM on January 23, 2009


not necessarily, nanojath. I mean, sure, if the intent were to make it seem like you'd been around forever, but the profile wouldn't change to "sometime in 1999" or anything, so I don't see much of what the point would be there. If, however, the point were to have a user number that has some special significance to you, that makes some sense to me. ## is taken by someone who made a hundred posts (and only 19 comments!) back in '99, but if it had been unused or untaken, I'd be sorely tempted to buy it for my own amusement.
posted by Navelgazer at 12:52 PM on January 23, 2009


yey. check out my user number! could i sell it on ebay?
posted by soundofsuburbia at 12:53 PM on January 23, 2009


er, that was supposed to be...

MORE LIKE 737427456 SUCKER

More like 4815162342, don't you mean ?
posted by y2karl at 12:56 PM on January 23, 2009


If anyone sends me $10 USD and an SASE, I will mail them a note saying 'You are a tool' which is almost the same thing.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:49 AM on January 23


What's your address? I could use a more formal diagnosis.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 1:01 PM on January 23, 2009


I would like to auction off my virginity. It's well used, but might make for an interesting planter or found object art piece, if you're crafty.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 1:03 PM on January 23, 2009 [2 favorites]


Hostile takeovers of user numbers. You could get bidding wars going, and the unless the owner coughs up more cash than the potential buyer, they get their number taken away, the buyer gets it, and the original owner gets a new, previously unused, user number.
posted by backseatpilot at 1:11 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


If you have a high user number and you're feeling inadequate, just put in your profile that you used to have a mefi account back in the day but forgot the password. That would totally work, and you'd gain the respect of your peers and even a few gullible piers.
posted by drezdn at 1:15 PM on January 23, 2009


I need biers.
posted by Navelgazer at 1:18 PM on January 23, 2009


Can we have airnxtz run the eBay auctions?
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 1:22 PM on January 23, 2009 [4 favorites]


I would actually pay pretty good money* for http://www.metafilter.com/user/elliotharmon, which would look just like my user page, except be indexable for search engines. I'd love for my Metafilter profile to come up when people look for me. It'd be like a vanity, metafilter-flavored homepage.

*By which I mean, like, maybe 30 bucks.
posted by roll truck roll at 1:26 PM on January 23, 2009


The first person to sign up with the username jenny, should, of course, get user number 8675309.
posted by bonehead at 1:27 PM on January 23, 2009 [6 favorites]


I'm willing to sell off the underscore in my username if anyone's interested. According to my calculations, it should be worth about 1 or 2 user numbers, ie you'd get user number 1 (virtually unused, I'd guess) or 2 (not in use).
posted by daniel_charms at 1:27 PM on January 23, 2009


If you have a high user number and you're feeling inadequate, just put in your profile that you used to have a mefi account back in the day but forgot the password.

Aw. I'm pretty sure I actually did that in a comment at some point. Sorry, everybody. I'd say I should know better, but I'm just a 66k n00b.
posted by penduluum at 1:27 PM on January 23, 2009


If I had only waited a few seconds more, i could ,have gotten 666, who wonders just the same thing....
posted by nomisxid at 1:31 PM on January 23, 2009


Sell off jonmc's number and comment history if he's gone.
posted by Rumple at 1:33 PM on January 23, 2009


I have a unique user number, can anyone figure out why?
posted by empath at 1:42 PM on January 23, 2009


The problem with auctioning off old user numbers is that those numbers are basically reserving high priority bandwidth spots. I don't know if some of the new users know about the bandwidth/user number ratio, but the lower your number, the faster your access to the site. Now that jonmc has left (or taken a breather while he heals up) there's a good chunk of bandwidth that'll trickle down to us lower #'s.

Allowing these lower numbers to be auctioned off would be akin to letting users above 10k use the new comment editing system or cabal control panel. It just wouldn't be fair to those of us who have put in the time.
posted by eyeballkid at 1:42 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


If anyone sends me $10 USD and an SASE, I will mail them a note saying 'You are a tool' which is almost the same thing.

I know a guy who auctioned his personal hatred off on Ebay.
posted by dunkadunc at 1:44 PM on January 23, 2009


If I had only waited a few seconds more, i could ,have gotten 666, who wonders just the same thing....

Me. If I had waited I could have gotten 24380, which would have been more easily divisible by ten.
posted by ob at 1:45 PM on January 23, 2009


empath, is it because every user number is, by definition, unique?
posted by Navelgazer at 1:47 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


So you'd like the MeFi equivalent of a vanity plate?
posted by magikker at 1:47 PM on January 23, 2009


I'm auctioning off some of my favorites.
posted by Astro Zombie at 1:48 PM on January 23, 2009


Astro Zombie, I'll take... twelve.

Yes, twelve seems about right.
posted by Navelgazer at 1:49 PM on January 23, 2009


More like 4815162342, don't you mean ?

I said what I meant and I meant what I said.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 1:51 PM on January 23, 2009


empath, maybe it's yr birthday?
posted by lester's sock puppet at 1:54 PM on January 23, 2009


Each night I wonder what it would be like to be able to go back in time to get a low user number. Then surely MetaFilter would love me... surely... surely....

If only I'd known MetaFilter sooner. It wouldn't be like it is right now!

But no matter how much you wish, it ain't possible to go back in time. "Look forward, Mister Cheese," is what I tell myself, "MetaFilter seems happy." It say it to the spackle on the drywall next to my bed. "That's all that matters, is MetaFilter's happiness." If MetaFilter is happy, then I'm happy. Don't need no low user number.
posted by Mister Cheese at 1:56 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


I've been here longer than Astro Zombie? That just doesn't...seem right.
posted by slogger at 2:03 PM on January 23, 2009


Yeah, some son of a bitch took my name, too ^

hey! You joined up a year before I did. But I'll sell you this user name for a bottle of gin and two cheap cigars.

Oddly, this is the only place my name was ever available to me, out of dozens of sites and etc over the past decade. I blame James William 'the forehead' Van Der Beek Jr, who made my social life a living hell.
posted by dawson at 2:05 PM on January 23, 2009


matt, I think you've got a prize for the next December contest.
posted by boo_radley at 2:05 PM on January 23, 2009


Low user numbers are overrated. User name length is where it's at.
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 2:07 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


I wouldn't mind having gleuschk's. Mine's not even a valid zip code!
posted by mattbucher at 2:10 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


dawson, you should have done what I did, and responded to every joke with a resigned, "yeah, never heard that one before," and make everyone feel really lame about it. Because, you know, people love to hang around people who make them feel bad for making jokes. It's win-win!
posted by Navelgazer at 2:18 PM on January 23, 2009


empath, b/c they're all unique
posted by found missing at 2:20 PM on January 23, 2009


I don't know whether to feel cool or insanely dorky that I got the "Rhode Island license plates" reference.

I'm gonna go with the latter.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 2:22 PM on January 23, 2009


Also, I'm willing to syndicate spin-off usernames including "lemonmoon" "grapefruitsatellite" "limemoon", etc. for a measly $10. Oh, and your soul.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 2:24 PM on January 23, 2009


crash! Did you just want to end your first account's comments at 6666?
posted by eyeballkid at 2:24 PM on January 23, 2009


Nope. Real Name length is where it's at.
posted by gman at 2:24 PM on January 23, 2009


"crash! Did you just want to end your first account's comments at 6666?"

Ha! I didn't notice that.

I mean, uh, YEAH, THAT'S THE TICKET!
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 2:29 PM on January 23, 2009


This is a bad idea. There are only so many inactive low numbers; Matt would only be able to milk a limited amount of money out of people who'd be willing to pay for a faux finish of antiquity.

A better milking strategy: reinstate the image tag, but with a per-use fee.
posted by CKmtl at 2:33 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


Has mathowie considered auctioning off users?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:35 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


Who wants a low user number? What you should be auctioning off is Stan Chin's gold star.
posted by willnot at 2:48 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


Has mathowie considered auctioning off users?

Now how the fuck would I know?
posted by dawson at 2:48 PM on January 23, 2009


I have a unique user number, can anyone figure out why?

Unique up on it?
posted by pineapple at 3:02 PM on January 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


Hey, 64035, user number 24 would be a better fit, no?
posted by terrapin at 3:17 PM on January 23, 2009


I'm semi-certain that the "orthogonal" account is one I signed up for and then lost the password to; "orthogonality" has always been a less-favored version.
posted by orthogonality at 3:18 PM on January 23, 2009


I, for one, would pay an extra $5 for 0, -1, e or pi. $10 for i.
posted by GuyZero at 3:21 PM on January 23, 2009


While we're on the subject, it turns out that this little tool still seems to work OK, five years later. Average member number in this thread is 30259.
posted by DrJohnEvans at 3:32 PM on January 23, 2009


At least go in and change the username for #99 to luft balloons or beers on the wall.
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 3:35 PM on January 23, 2009 [3 favorites]


"Average member number in this thread is 30259"

Sorry for blowing the curve there. You can use 11817 if it makes you feel better.
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 3:37 PM on January 23, 2009


No, we need those for the escape pods.

"Open the pod bay door, Matt"

"I'm afraid I can't do that, cortex"
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:46 PM on January 23, 2009


I'd pay a reasonable fee for my old account names. I miss them. *sigh*
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 3:54 PM on January 23, 2009


same here.
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:55 PM on January 23, 2009


orthogonal, from back in the pre-fee days.
posted by cortex (staff) at 4:12 PM on January 23, 2009


I have an unused folder at the root level of my HD directory that I created before metafilter went online. I've copied it through three computer and two major OS upgrades, and perhaps it's time to let go of the thing. I will email it to you for a reasonable price. Make an offer!

So. Anyway. There used to be a little text thingy at the top of the front page that said how many members there were. I liked that, because every time I looked at it, it inflated my self-worth as a long-time community member by however much it had increased since the last time I looked at it. Can we have that pony back?
posted by Devils Rancher at 4:14 PM on January 23, 2009


I really don't want to be on a forum where people care more about being cool than being of substance.

I thought this was the point of metafilter...if it's not, tell me. I can go out and try to make meatspace friends here in LA.
posted by hal_c_on at 4:22 PM on January 23, 2009


Yeah... my user number is pretty high here with the rabble.

But I've got a single digit number at the cabal. In fact, everyone in the cabal has unique single digit numbers. Don't ask how they do it, they're the cabal.

TINC.
posted by qvantamon at 4:33 PM on January 23, 2009


People signing up, taking up valuable usernames, and then not actually using the site bother me. It really doesn't seem right for a user, who's actually going to participate, not to have access to their favored name just because some jerk signed up three years ago with it and then skedaddled.

rant rant rant.
posted by Ms. Saint at 4:33 PM on January 23, 2009


No way, man. "Klang Klangston" is a brand. An angry, irrational, often drunk, brand. You know, like the RIAA or Sony.
posted by klangklangston at 4:38 PM on January 23, 2009


I'm semi-certain that the "orthogonal" account is one I signed up for and then lost the password to; "orthogonality" has always been a less-favored version.

But what are you orthogonal to anyway?
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 4:55 PM on January 23, 2009


In fact, everyone in the cabal has unique single digit numbers.

That's not exactly true.
posted by the Cabal at 4:57 PM on January 23, 2009


That's not exactly true.

Cheer up. 71357 is ᘚ in base-15315305432833 notation.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 5:00 PM on January 23, 2009


I really don't want to be on a forum where people care more about being cool than being of substance.

I don't want to be on a forum where all the cool kids are on substances either. Just say no to drugs *and* vanity user numbers!
posted by PeterMcDermott at 5:07 PM on January 23, 2009


well, see, we're all people of substance, so we gotta start somewhere, you know?
posted by boo_radley at 5:32 PM on January 23, 2009


To hell with low numbers: I'm waiting to pounce on UID 100,000. If I fail at that, I'm going for 123456.
posted by SteveTheRed at 5:41 PM on January 23, 2009


Lowtags.com
posted by fixedgear at 6:27 PM on January 23, 2009


leet user numba
posted by Mister_A at 6:30 PM on January 23, 2009


Hey fixedgear! I used to see Delaware 8 parked at the 4 Seasons in Philly. It was on a Rolls or something like that.
posted by Mister_A at 6:31 PM on January 23, 2009


My sub stance has always been against the renewal of Trident.
posted by Abiezer at 6:32 PM on January 23, 2009


Do not auction off Stan Star's Golden Chin!
posted by Mister_A at 6:35 PM on January 23, 2009


I'd love to be #6, but I'm afraid #1 or #292 would be sending Rovers after me all the time.
posted by pjern at 6:41 PM on January 23, 2009


I'm sorry, Substance is pretty much all the essential Joy Division. New Order too.
posted by klangklangston at 6:59 PM on January 23, 2009


I went to try and check Blazecock Pileon's calculation and I found that the Unicode resolved to a Sayisi Ji; it's part of a Canadian First Nation syllabary.

I think that means he knows MUCH more math than I do.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 8:16 PM on January 23, 2009


314 was never finalized, but 31415 was.
posted by paisley henosis at 8:54 PM on January 23, 2009


paisley henosis, I was just thinking that having user number 3.1415 would be awesome -- since it would require a database schema change. I'd pay good money for that just to fuck with people's heads.
posted by sdodd at 9:36 PM on January 23, 2009


I am not a number — I am a free man!

Oh? I'm definitely a number.
posted by pompomtom at 9:50 PM on January 23, 2009


I'm more interested in the idea of a group of people getting user names related to members of a band, characters in a movie or anime, or even cabinet members of the previous White House administration.

I've taken a song title. Who wants other titles by the same band? These include (but are not limited to):

Special Ability to Expose Moonlit Nights
My Body Wishes That You Burn to the Moon
Eirin's Clinic that People Queue Up For
Stops At the Affected Area and Immediately Dissolves
It Doesn't Stop at the Affected Area, But Goes Deep Inside and Aah Aaahn
You Should Drink Cucumber-Flavored Beer
Give Praise Unto Me, and Celebrate My Miracles
Bow Down, You Ignorant Fools!

Just mull it over.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 12:01 AM on January 24, 2009


Am I the only MeFite who's never had a sock puppet account?
posted by eyeballkid at 9:39 AM on January 26, 2009


no, EBK, your not.
and I AM THE Terence Stamp of Metafilter
posted by clavdivs at 11:42 AM on January 26, 2009


Marisa wa taihen na mono o nusunde ikimashita.
posted by languagehat at 12:25 PM on January 26, 2009


ーヾ(゜∀゜)ノ♪
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 12:34 PM on January 26, 2009


paisley henosis, I was just thinking that having user number 3.1415 would be awesome
Just what we all are hoping for. More irrational users.
posted by Killick at 1:29 PM on January 26, 2009


Chiki-ti chiki-ti chiki-ti chiki-ti chiki-ti chiki-ti chiki-ti chiki-ti
posted by clavdivs at 11:46 AM on January 27, 2009


In the world of Afro Samurai, it is said that the one who becomes "Number One" will rule the world, wielding powers akin to a god. Someone becomes Number One by killing the previous Number One and taking his ceremonial headband. However, the only rule in this world is that only the "Number Two" (also designated by a sacred headband) is allowed to challenge the "Number One." The downside of this is that anyone (and typically everyone) can challenge and try to kill the Number Two, to gain the right to move forward and challenge Number One.
posted by eamondaly at 11:51 AM on January 27, 2009


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