They say it's your birthday!

September 4, 2009 5:01 PM

A collaborative serenade for our beloved moderatrix on her birthday.
posted by Horace Rumpole to MetaFilter-related at 5:01 PM (75 comments total)

This is fantastic.
posted by ColdChef at 5:09 PM on September 4

Wheeeeeee! Virgos are the bestest.
posted by The Whelk at 5:10 PM on September 4

Happy Birthday to you dear Jessamyn! The actual day is tomorrow but the love is so great it had to be expressed hours before the actual time. And man oh man, your beloved did a great job with the music. *flings cyber confetti, whoo hoo
posted by nickyskye at 5:11 PM on September 4

You don't actually look like a monkey; that was poetic license.
posted by klangklangston at 5:16 PM on September 4 [5 favorites]

But also, is this where the cake is? Your boyfriend, I think he promised us cake.

(Man, I went to a birthday party once where the kid had some of that ice cream cake. He must have been the richest and most powerful and popular kid ever at my school, because the rest of us only ever got that bland sheet cake—which I hold was so-called because it was first made by Italian immigrant bakers who had stereotypical accents and also deep antipathy to their chosen vocation—except when my mom made carob cupcakes. I hated them then, but I kinda wonder if they'd be good now.

Anyway, happy birthday!)
posted by klangklangston at 5:20 PM on September 4 [1 favorite]

Happy birthday!
posted by By The Grace of God at 5:22 PM on September 4

That was an incredible song. Although not as incredible as the amount of patience jessamyn has with us.
posted by DU at 5:23 PM on September 4 [1 favorite]

We have cameras too...
posted by netbros at 5:24 PM on September 4

Cake, Klang? I GAVE YOU CAKE!
posted by The Whelk at 5:25 PM on September 4 [1 favorite]

Yay—happy birthday, Jessamyn!
posted by limeonaire at 5:26 PM on September 4

Happy Birthday to you, Jessamyn!
I am sorry I have zero recording equipment. I'm singing it right now though.
posted by carsonb at 5:38 PM on September 4

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY FAVORITE FEMALE MOD BORN ON THIS DAY THAT WORKS AT METAFILTER AND HASN'T BANNED ME!!!
Sorry the pickups on the electric tuba weren't working
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:51 PM on September 4

What a brilliant thing to do for lovely Jessamyn.

Happy birthday!
posted by special-k at 6:12 PM on September 4

Aw yay Jessamyn! Thank you for your patience and tolerance in precisely the amounts in which they exist (i.e. generally very patient but willing to stand your ground). We are very glad you were born and wish you many happy returns of the day.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 6:13 PM on September 4 [1 favorite]

Happy birthday Jessamyn and thanks for all you do around here.
posted by Sailormom at 6:17 PM on September 4

Did someone say songs and cake?
posted by Weighted Companion Cube at 6:28 PM on September 4 [3 favorites]

Happy birthday, jessamyn! I'm very happy you're here, and I'm happy to know you.
posted by rtha at 6:38 PM on September 4

Utterly. Awesome.
Happy Birthday, Jessamyn.
posted by faineant at 6:46 PM on September 4

Is this where we come to queue up for cake?

Happy Birthday Jessamyn! You have a truly wonderful boyfriend!
posted by goshling at 6:48 PM on September 4

Happy Birthday!!
posted by iamkimiam at 6:49 PM on September 4

I see that The Great Big Mulp did not send along my contribution. It was heartfelt, dammit, HEARTFELT!

Happy Birthday, Jessamyn! May there be more, may they be joyous.
posted by Kattullus at 6:58 PM on September 4 [1 favorite]

Happy Birthday, Jessamyn!
posted by kuujjuarapik at 7:12 PM on September 4

One is tempted to drop a big flaming pile of trollbaiting poo right here, kind of like a birthday spanking.

Just kidding. Happy birthday!
posted by fourcheesemac at 7:16 PM on September 4

Now that I've actually listened to it... well, it's pretty damn great. Good job, not_on_display and all who contributed.

Since I'm posting... here's my favorite Birthday song YouTube video.
posted by Kattullus at 7:31 PM on September 4

Happy Birthday, Jessamyn!

fourcheesemac said: One is tempted to drop a big flaming pile of trollbaiting poo right here, kind of like a birthday spanking.

Shhh! The flaming and pooping troll is supposed to jump out of the cake! Don't ruin the surprise!
posted by amyms at 7:34 PM on September 4 [2 favorites]

Happy birthday Jessamyn. Eat a lot of broccoli and drink a lot of beer.
posted by boo_radley at 8:03 PM on September 4

Happy Birthday, Jessamyn!
posted by CrystalDave at 8:13 PM on September 4

This is me giving you an imaginary cupcake over the Internet.
posted by The Straightener at 8:21 PM on September 4 [1 favorite]

Fuckity fuck fuck! I just remembered what that nagging thing in the back of my head that I was supposed to do and send out last week was.

Oh well, the song turned out fantastic. Happy pre-birthday Jessamyn. Thanks for continuing to be awesome and putting up with all the silliness we throw your way.
posted by quin at 8:26 PM on September 4

Wouldn't a moderatrix be a pill-popping girl with a pixie cut and lots of eyeliner in a grey full-buttoned suit on a really tricked out scooter?

And how come there's not porn about them already?
posted by yhbc at 8:27 PM on September 4 [3 favorites]

Happy B-Day!

(It's tomorrow only a few thousand miles to my east).
posted by Atreides at 8:34 PM on September 4

¡Cumpeaños feliz!
posted by chiababe at 8:48 PM on September 4

Indeed. Happy Birthday, and many many happy returns of the day.
posted by GenjiandProust at 8:49 PM on September 4

Happy birthday, Jessamyn!

Well done, not_on_display.
posted by Bookhouse at 8:58 PM on September 4

Happy Birthday!

(Go ahead and delete this comment, just because you can. It's your birthday. You know you want to. Come on. Delete it. It will feel good, I promise.)
posted by The World Famous at 9:06 PM on September 4

What a cool present. Well done, everyone. Happy birthday, Jessamyn!
posted by mogget at 9:23 PM on September 4

Yay! Happy happy! Many more!
posted by Space Kitty at 9:55 PM on September 4

Happy Birthday, Jessamyn!
posted by juv3nal at 10:06 PM on September 4

Happy Birthday Jessamyn, or as I say "Congratulations on making it through another year!"
posted by artsygeek at 10:10 PM on September 4

Happy birthday, kiddo. Take the weekend off.

I'm going to need you to cover my shift for about a month after that, though.
posted by cortex at 10:12 PM on September 4 [5 favorites]

Happy Birthday. I had totally forgotten about the birthday coming up, and wasn't invited to the sing along. However, allow me to share with you my family's birthday tradition.

In our family, one birthday song is not enough, no. We always follow up the traditional "to you" with the following:

It makes me think of the good old days
Happy birthday to you
You sure grew out of your baby ways
Happy birthday to you

Forty-first birthday, we wish you many more
Health and wealth and friends by the score
Cut the cake and lets eat some more
Happy birthday to you
From a song by Tina Liza Jones (click play on Birthday Cake), although I'd always known the John McCutcheon version

followed immediately with

Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
Just for you
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
And may all your dreams come true
When you blow out the candles
One light still will glow.
That's the love light in your heart
Where e'er you go.
Incredibly sappy, I know, but so sweet to hear from your loved ones at your birthday. The lyrics above are what we sing, but here are some kids (not anyone I know) singing the correct lyrics. From the song "Happy Birthday" by Tom Chapin, apparently.

posted by Deathalicious at 10:22 PM on September 4 [1 favorite]

Most awesome awesomeness from the MeFi Sekrit Orchestra and happy birthday, fellow MeFibrarian!
posted by Lynsey at 12:14 AM on September 5

Wouldn't a moderatrix be a pill-popping girl with a pixie cut and lots of eyeliner in a grey full-buttoned suit on a really tricked out scooter?

And how come there's not porn about them already?

This is the Happy Birthday thread, not Ask A Librarian. Just because the birthday girl happens to *be* a librarian, that's no reason to be putting her to work on her birthday.

Though I would totally buy such porn.

Also: Happy Bday Jess.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 12:33 AM on September 5

Do moderatrixes engage in moderatio?

How many candles?

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
|==========|
|==========|
posted by BrotherCaine at 2:00 AM on September 5

how come there's not porn about them already?
I'm sure there is if you look for it.
posted by dg at 2:22 AM on September 5

I'm sure there is if you look for it.

I'm finding moderators of porn sites and post-modern porn, but not a single naked suedehead could I find anywhere.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 3:01 AM on September 5

Hmmm, same here. Could it be that we have stumbled on the only topic in the universe that hasn't been turned into a fetish?
posted by dg at 3:07 AM on September 5

Rule 34 falsified? I think I finally have a viable topic for my PhD thesis...
posted by PeterMcDermott at 4:37 AM on September 5

I wish you a happy happy birthday, Jessamyn - from the Philly airport (post cavity search after a fuckin' 13 hour flight back from the Middle East. Bastards!!)
posted by gman at 4:57 AM on September 5

Happy B'day Jessamyn! My total lack of tech skills kept me from sending a contribution, but believe me, I'm singing my head off all day, in your honor.
posted by Hobgoblin at 6:02 AM on September 5

Happy birthday, Jessamyn!!!
posted by the littlest brussels sprout at 7:30 AM on September 5

Happy Birthday, Almost Birthday Buddy!!! :)
posted by grapefruitmoon at 8:05 AM on September 5

Thanks so much folks! I'm more or less taking the weekend off [after which I'll be working the rest of the month, have a fun trip cortex/mathowie!] to go hang out on a lake in Northern Vermont. Loved the song, we'll put it on the ipod for the drive up.
posted by jessamyn at 8:31 AM on September 5

Happy birthday, Jessamyn! And may you have a bouncing baby SXSW panel for your next half-birthday!
posted by lukemeister at 8:32 AM on September 5

Happy Birthday!
posted by kiwi-epitome at 8:42 AM on September 5

That song is brilliant! What fun - a fitting tribute!
Have a marvelous birthday jessamyn!
posted by madamjujujive at 8:54 AM on September 5

Happy Birthday Jessamyn!
posted by scottymac at 9:36 AM on September 5

Happy Birthday Jessamyn!
posted by Grlnxtdr at 10:52 AM on September 5

We've got on pretty skirts and slacks,
Blouses and collared shirts;
We pile our presents in a stack
And crouch until it hurts.
We crouch and crouch and crouch some more
—"Continue crouching, please!
"Remember, what we're crouching for
"Is worth more than our knees!"
We're hidden till the birthday boy
(Or girl, as they too age)
Comes nonchalantly through the foy-
Er—Then we take the stage.
With all our might, we jump and shout,
"SURPRISE," and, "HAPPY BIRTH—"
Till horror comes and hurries out
The remnants of our mirth.
We scurry out behind it
Through the door from whence we came,
Embarrassed and befuddled
Over where to lay the blame.
It seems when we were planning for
This covert birthday do,
Somebody wrote Room 204
Instead of 402.

EAT YOUR BIG LACY HEART OUT, HALLMARK! Also: Happy Birthday, Jessamyn.
posted by Sys Rq at 11:38 AM on September 5 [2 favorites]

WOOO!!! HAPPPYYY BIRTHDAY!
posted by odinsdream at 11:39 AM on September 5

Happy birthday!
posted by languagehat at 1:01 PM on September 5

Doing the happy birthday dance in your honor!!

(No, you really don't want to see me dance. It's TOTALLY the thought that counts with this one!)
posted by pearlybob at 1:11 PM on September 5

Happy birthday, Jessamyn!
posted by gleuschk at 1:33 PM on September 5

Yee hoo!! Greatest B-day song ever!
posted by snsranch at 3:03 PM on September 5

Hartelijk gefeliciteerd! (Happy birthday Jessamyn!)
posted by kudzu at 4:26 PM on September 5

Happy Birthday Jessamyn :) And mini hippo returns!
posted by vronsky at 4:31 PM on September 5

(\(\
( - -)
((') (')
Hoppy Burfday!
posted by deborah at 5:18 PM on September 5

aww totally cute songy thing. happy birthday j-mod and happy song debut days for all the artists.
posted by cowbellemoo at 6:18 PM on September 5

Jassamyn, you are a significant percentage of why I love this site!
posted by serazin at 7:10 PM on September 5

Happy birthday, Jessamyn.
posted by Crabby Appleton at 9:15 PM on September 5

Dear jessamyn...
posted by subbes at 9:23 PM on September 5

Ah, the best of intentions -- alas. I couldn't find the bow for my saw. Cheers, and great work not_on_display. You're a good sort of guy for a girl to have around, from what I can tell.
posted by Devils Rancher at 9:42 AM on September 6

Happy birthday from a fellow Virgo (birthday is tomorrow)!
posted by ericb at 2:50 PM on September 6

Happy late birthday! I will never forget that time at that Boston meetup where we passed the phone around to talk to you, and I was introduced, "Now here's backseatpilot!" and I picked up the phone and you called me by my real name. I was pretty impressed, since we had only met in person once. You take good care of this site, you do.
posted by backseatpilot at 5:28 PM on September 6

I'm so glad it worked wonderfully. Thanks again to all of you.
posted by not_on_display at 8:14 AM on September 8