Sink or Swim July 4, 2010 12:26 AM Subscribe
Impromptu Baltimore meetup? My boat sank (quite literally).
I came to Baltimore to go sailing; my boat sank. As in, it filled with the waters of the Chesapeake Bay, negating its buoyancy. A bit touch-and-go there for about an hour. Then, through a series of misadventures, I ended my evening eating with a lovely group of Rollerderby lesbians, attempting to convince them to become fans of Gilbert & Sullivan.
Now at very late notice and landlocked, I would like to entertain any Baltimore Mefites available today, Sunday the Fourth, or tomorrow, the Fifth, anywhere convenient to my downtown Baltimore hotel.
I came to Baltimore to go sailing; my boat sank. As in, it filled with the waters of the Chesapeake Bay, negating its buoyancy. A bit touch-and-go there for about an hour. Then, through a series of misadventures, I ended my evening eating with a lovely group of Rollerderby lesbians, attempting to convince them to become fans of Gilbert & Sullivan.
Now at very late notice and landlocked, I would like to entertain any Baltimore Mefites available today, Sunday the Fourth, or tomorrow, the Fifth, anywhere convenient to my downtown Baltimore hotel.
Dude, I'm noplace hear Baltimore, but I think we ALL want more details about this boat-sinking incident.
I second that emotion.
posted by amyms at 2:24 AM on July 4, 2010
I second that emotion.
posted by amyms at 2:24 AM on July 4, 2010
Did you save the boat?
I'm a bit far away to come and ask you personally.
posted by adamvasco at 2:56 AM on July 4, 2010
I'm a bit far away to come and ask you personally.
posted by adamvasco at 2:56 AM on July 4, 2010
I used to crew (sheets and guy) on a J30 so I would also like to hear the details of your near swimming experience.
posted by vapidave at 3:14 AM on July 4, 2010
posted by vapidave at 3:14 AM on July 4, 2010
I'm nowhere near Baltimore, but I like your misadventures. I feel like the story is going to begin something like this:
posted by zachlipton at 3:21 AM on July 4, 2010 [5 favorites]
We sail the ocean blue,Best of luck with your boat!
And our saucy ship's a beauty;
We're sober men and true,
And attentive to our duty.
When the balls whistle free
O'er the bright blue sea,
We stand to our guns all day;
When at anchor we ride
On the Portsmouth tide,
We have plenty of time for play.
posted by zachlipton at 3:21 AM on July 4, 2010 [5 favorites]
I was washed up in Baltimore a few years ago but I moved on.
Best of luck, and check out Fell's Point if you haven't already.
posted by bardic at 3:57 AM on July 4, 2010
Best of luck, and check out Fell's Point if you haven't already.
posted by bardic at 3:57 AM on July 4, 2010
I am in Baltimore this weekend, but am pretty busy. We're going to the BSO concert\fireworks at Oregon Ridge TONIGHT, if you want to meet there.
posted by Confess, Fletch at 5:16 AM on July 4, 2010
posted by Confess, Fletch at 5:16 AM on July 4, 2010
I was in Baltimore, but after an unfortunate incident in Chesapeake Bay I had to leave town quick before the coastguard caught up with me.
posted by Abiezer at 5:35 AM on July 4, 2010 [8 favorites]
posted by Abiezer at 5:35 AM on July 4, 2010 [8 favorites]
Dude, Abiezer, aren't you in Beijing? You made a quick getaway!
posted by cgc373 at 5:42 AM on July 4, 2010
posted by cgc373 at 5:42 AM on July 4, 2010
I lived in Baltimore for 10 years without a single lousy meetup (granted, this was before the whole internet existed, let alone MeFi), and now the most epic reason for meeting up of all time has to occur when I am on the opposite edge of the continent. Ortho, would you like to come sink your boat in San Francisco Bay?
posted by Quietgal at 7:36 AM on July 4, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by Quietgal at 7:36 AM on July 4, 2010 [2 favorites]
I'm up in Boston, but if you meet a roller derby chick named Xena Paradox, tell her hello.
posted by rmd1023 at 7:54 AM on July 4, 2010
posted by rmd1023 at 7:54 AM on July 4, 2010
I'm in baltimore, and I'm not really doing anything today...also I'm a rollerderby person so I'd love to hear who you met up with yesterday!
Also, I totally know Xena, she is the raddest, I'll tell her you said hi, rmd1023!
posted by capnsue at 9:29 AM on July 4, 2010
Also, I totally know Xena, she is the raddest, I'll tell her you said hi, rmd1023!
posted by capnsue at 9:29 AM on July 4, 2010
I also used to live in Baltimore before there was a metafilter and I even went sailing once or twice in a tiny little orange styrofoam boat but fortunately it never sank, because back then if you ended up in the harbor you were pretty much guaranteed to rise again monstrous, tentacular and mutated. Do keep an eye on yourself to make sure you don't start sprouting extra limbs or superpowers. If you are totally at loose ends I will recommend a friendly and laid back bar that is just called BAR; it's in Fells Point around the corner from Jimmy's, which is a renowned diner, but don't eat there: go and have a crab cake sub and fries with gravy at the Sip N' Bite in Canton.
posted by mygothlaundry at 10:05 AM on July 4, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by mygothlaundry at 10:05 AM on July 4, 2010 [1 favorite]
cgc373 - I may be a careless sailor but I'm careful when it comes to extradition treaties.
posted by Abiezer at 11:19 AM on July 4, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by Abiezer at 11:19 AM on July 4, 2010 [1 favorite]
this is simply wonderful...
*agog with curiosity; waits for sinking tale*
posted by infini at 11:41 AM on July 4, 2010
*agog with curiosity; waits for sinking tale*
posted by infini at 11:41 AM on July 4, 2010
Ha, another person who knows Xena. Saw her last weekend at ECE.
Totally want to hear more about the boat sinking.
posted by Fuego at 12:16 PM on July 4, 2010
Totally want to hear more about the boat sinking.
posted by Fuego at 12:16 PM on July 4, 2010
I'm in Switzerland, but I'm glad you're okay! And yeah, I want to hear this story too.
posted by bettafish at 12:19 PM on July 4, 2010
posted by bettafish at 12:19 PM on July 4, 2010
I'm from Baltimore, and am proud to see that you were given the typical Charm City Welcome - ruin your day, and then make it all worthwhile.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 3:01 PM on July 4, 2010 [4 favorites]
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 3:01 PM on July 4, 2010 [4 favorites]
Oh, man. I wish I'd checked MeTa earlier.
posted by Faint of Butt at 6:27 PM on July 4, 2010
posted by Faint of Butt at 6:27 PM on July 4, 2010
Ew. Sip and Bite is horrible now. I heartily recommend Bar Bar, though. Just be sure to look extra gruff or they'll charge you double.
posted by youcancallmeal at 6:31 PM on July 4, 2010
posted by youcancallmeal at 6:31 PM on July 4, 2010
Damn, couldn't you wash ashore during a less busy weekend? Like Artscape?
Dude, I'm noplace hear Baltimore, but I think we ALL want more details about this boat-sinking incident.
I'm more interested in the Rollerderby Lesbians.
I'm kidding. I probably do know them. CCRG?
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 7:47 PM on July 4, 2010
Dude, I'm noplace hear Baltimore, but I think we ALL want more details about this boat-sinking incident.
I'm more interested in the Rollerderby Lesbians.
I'm kidding. I probably do know them. CCRG?
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 7:47 PM on July 4, 2010
So Wendy's mom made these awsome chess squares, and I'm sorry about your boat, but these are really awsome.
posted by nola at 10:19 PM on July 4, 2010
posted by nola at 10:19 PM on July 4, 2010
Please, please, tell me it was pirates.
posted by theora55 at 9:40 AM on July 5, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by theora55 at 9:40 AM on July 5, 2010 [1 favorite]
Please, please, tell me it was pirates.
He's in Baltimore, not Pittsburgh.
posted by jonmc at 12:46 PM on July 5, 2010
He's in Baltimore, not Pittsburgh.
posted by jonmc at 12:46 PM on July 5, 2010
Pirates can be obtained in Baltimore on very short notice. Ask me how!
posted by Faint of Butt at 1:05 PM on July 5, 2010
posted by Faint of Butt at 1:05 PM on July 5, 2010
Don't worry, Pittsburgh'll sell off all of the best pirates to the highestlowest bidder, so Baltimore can have some too!
posted by that girl at 6:39 PM on July 5, 2010
posted by that girl at 6:39 PM on July 5, 2010
We've got pirates. They have water cannons.
Hey, waitaminute...
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 6:53 PM on July 5, 2010
Hey, waitaminute...
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 6:53 PM on July 5, 2010
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR BOAT GODDAMMIT
I HAVE BEEN IN AN AGONY OF SUSPENSE FOR TWO DAYS NOW
posted by elizardbits at 3:05 PM on July 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
I HAVE BEEN IN AN AGONY OF SUSPENSE FOR TWO DAYS NOW
posted by elizardbits at 3:05 PM on July 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
Yeah, if details aren't forthcoming I'm going to start making shit up. Were you torpedoed by the same North Korean submarine that torpedoed the Deepwater Horizon? Or was your hull pierced by a beachmaster sea lion angered by your attempts to mate with his harem?
posted by vapidave at 6:09 PM on July 6, 2010
posted by vapidave at 6:09 PM on July 6, 2010
I bet it was Justin Bieber riding a robotic velociraptor.
posted by elizardbits at 8:21 PM on July 6, 2010
posted by elizardbits at 8:21 PM on July 6, 2010
Wait no JBeebs is definitely not awesome enough for a robovelociraptor. Maybe a wind-up turkey.
posted by elizardbits at 8:22 PM on July 6, 2010
posted by elizardbits at 8:22 PM on July 6, 2010
Sunk by a great white, I bet. Did you hire a captain named Quint?
posted by hippybear at 9:22 PM on July 6, 2010
posted by hippybear at 9:22 PM on July 6, 2010
He was caught between Scylla and Charybdis so he decided to let it sink
posted by infini at 9:51 PM on July 6, 2010
posted by infini at 9:51 PM on July 6, 2010
He was torpedoed by warfighters.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 11:54 PM on July 6, 2010
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 11:54 PM on July 6, 2010
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posted by hippybear at 1:38 AM on July 4, 2010 [12 favorites]