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Try putting an entire plate of Beans on that Sandwich September 10, 2010 10:15 AM   Subscribe

Odd callout: Are people really uncreative that they can't figure out what to add to their grilled cheese sandwich? Its chatfilter. Its beyond chatfilter... Its asking if we can write every itteration of cheese+bread+some special ingredient down. Plus, this has been covered before. Seriously, do we need to overthink a plate of cheese, bread, and butter a second time because someone can't search?
posted by Nanukthedog to MetaFilter-Related at 10:15 AM (303 comments total) 3 users marked this as a favorite

can't you just not read it? i liked that question. finding new ways to make simple foods is the way i like to cook.
posted by nadawi at 10:19 AM on September 10, 2010 [35 favorites]


No, the question is fine.

If you want ideas for grilled cheese, AskMe is a good place to ask for suggestions. This is clearly not "I want to just chat about grilled cheese" there is a specific problem to be solved.

Not everyone's brain works the same.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 10:20 AM on September 10, 2010 [8 favorites]


yes.
grilled cheese is important.
posted by clavdivs at 10:20 AM on September 10, 2010 [28 favorites]


Tomato.
posted by 2bucksplus at 10:20 AM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


Weather or not you give someone grilled cheese is between you and your God.
posted by The Whelk at 10:22 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


I don't understand why this bother you, Nanuk. It just seems like charming fun to me, and it's basically within the AskMe guidelines. No animals were harmed.
posted by grobstein at 10:22 AM on September 10, 2010


Dear Penthouse ... I never thought it would happen to me ... there I was, making a grilled cheese sandwich ...
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 10:23 AM on September 10, 2010 [4 favorites]


I am continually surprised at people's outrage and wishes to delete questions they are not interested. Odd callout to grar on someone's non-creative thinking about cooking.

Especially when you welcome questions about cooking in your profile.
posted by nickjadlowe at 10:23 AM on September 10, 2010 [16 favorites]


Mmm, thank you for pointing out this question, I hadn't seen it. I want some grilled cheese now.
posted by amro at 10:24 AM on September 10, 2010 [4 favorites]


Its asking if we can write every itteration of cheese+bread+some special ingredient down.

I don't think so, as grilled cheese doesn't go well so with ice cream or coffee grounds.

But this is cool. Why shouldn't someone ask it, if they don't know the answer?
posted by SpacemanStix at 10:25 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


Gruyere cheese, and a layer of thinly sliced taters (the soft kind).
posted by jbickers at 10:26 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


Tomato.

Yes, with a little bit of brown mustard on top. People think this is crazy, but it's so good.
posted by SpacemanStix at 10:26 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


The first question asked for cheese combinations, and the second asked for extra topping ideas. Watch for the bread suggestion question later this week..
posted by mannequito at 10:26 AM on September 10, 2010


Any thread about grilled cheese is OK by me.
posted by matty at 10:26 AM on September 10, 2010 [7 favorites]


Beans and toast are good on a cold day. Especially when the beans are almost hot enough to burn the roof of your mouth, and then you wait, and wait, and wait for that special moment when that hot mess has cooled down enough to grab the buttery toast, pick it up and scoop in some toast and beans. Yum.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 10:27 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


What do you put on your grilled cheese to jazz it up?

Well, sometimes it's nice when she sticks her finger up my.... Huh? Grilled cheese. I know what it is. What are you talking about?
posted by yeti at 10:29 AM on September 10, 2010 [12 favorites]


Thank you for pointing me to that thread.
posted by Navelgazer at 10:31 AM on September 10, 2010


At its most basic level, it's a request for recipes, which I think is and has always been fine for AskMe, regardless of the particular ingredients.
posted by Gator at 10:31 AM on September 10, 2010


An irish butty is like a grilled cheese, but you fry it in the pan. Ideally in bacon fat. So it's like a grilled cheese but better, faster, and deadlier.
posted by The Whelk at 10:31 AM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


Was going to post something on MeTa about the proliferation of cooking questions today- duck, grilled cheese, now steaks.

I'm not sure what I'm cooking tonight, but I wanna cook something now. It's too bad it is too early for mushroom season- I would love to grind/stuff my own sausages and cook in a mushroom ragout tonight over polenta.

As for bread- real cuban bread works best- though hard to find outside of south florida.
posted by TheBones at 10:31 AM on September 10, 2010


bacon
posted by snsranch at 10:31 AM on September 10, 2010


I'm a total hardliner about chatfilter questions and doubles on AskMe, and I don't think this fits into either category. It's not chatfilter because there's a real, specific problem to be solved, and it's not a double because that other question is about cheese and this one is about non-cheese ingredients (well, maybe it's a double, it's just not a double of the question you link to).

Man, I could go for a grilled cheese.
posted by box at 10:32 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]



Man, I could go for a grilled cheese.

At least by me a drink first.
posted by The Whelk at 10:33 AM on September 10, 2010 [5 favorites]


How about a fake Guinness?
posted by box at 10:34 AM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


I don't like grilled cheese sandwiches.

There. I've said it.
posted by bondcliff at 10:35 AM on September 10, 2010


I'm having a cuban sandwich for lunch. I love me some grilled cheese, too, but today, a cuban beats all.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 10:36 AM on September 10, 2010


An irish butty is like a grilled cheese, but you fry it in the pan.

I've been frying grill cheese in a pan my whole life. Rules be damned.
posted by amro at 10:38 AM on September 10, 2010


YOU BETTER GODDAMN WELL UNFUCKING SAY IT THEN BONDCLIFF.
posted by Think_Long at 10:38 AM on September 10, 2010 [21 favorites]


I don't think doubles in AskMe are so great, but those a clearly two different questions.
posted by grouse at 10:38 AM on September 10, 2010


I was just looking in my fridge wondering what to do with this bacon, butter, bread and cheese. I'd never thought of a grilled cheese with bacon. Holy cats! Thanks for saving the day metafilter.
posted by peeedro at 10:38 AM on September 10, 2010


One of the very few good things about florida is access to beautiful cuban cuisine. MMMMM, cubans and mojitos- a bad stereotype, I know. I'm shameless sometimes.
posted by TheBones at 10:39 AM on September 10, 2010


I have lots of cheese but no bread. *cries*
posted by maudlin at 10:40 AM on September 10, 2010


I've pre-approved any question about grilled cheese sandwiches here, which is why they all get through.
posted by iconomy at 10:40 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


I really like questions like this because it's a great way to shake yourself out of your own rut. I mean, everyone KNOWS that the only acceptable topping on a grilled cheese sandwich is bacon and tomato but then someone drops in the thread and suggests putting potato chips on it and all of a sudden YOUR WORLD IS BLOWN APART.

Kind of like finding out that people stand to wipe. I mean, seriously, WTF?
posted by backseatpilot at 10:42 AM on September 10, 2010 [4 favorites]


I personally like to wake up, have some pee in my Cheerios, then come and post to metatalk about how dumb everybody is.

Are there any other things I can add to my Cheerios that might piss me off more?
posted by pazazygeek at 10:42 AM on September 10, 2010 [17 favorites]


What do you think of grilled cheese dipped in chocolate? That can't go wrong, right?
posted by amro at 10:42 AM on September 10, 2010


Would you like a grilled cheese sandwich with that whine? I recently read some tasty ways to spice it up, if it helps.
posted by inigo2 at 10:42 AM on September 10, 2010


So this is the one meta thread where it's okay if it dissolves into recipes?
posted by The Whelk at 10:42 AM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


Grilled cheese is a sufficiently important topic that I think it merits an update every 3+ years.
posted by *s at 10:43 AM on September 10, 2010


If you don't like it, flag it and move on, for fuck's sake. When did MeTa become the place to post about anything and everything that pisses you off?

Don't get me wrong, I'm glad that people come here instead of thread-shitting, but christ on a stick, it's gotten ridiculous. When there's a major conflict going on, I get it. When a controversial decision is made by the mods, I get it. But shit - you're calling out a goddamn grilled cheese thread?

Remember when there used to be runs of several days without a stupid callout in MeTa? I miss that.
posted by chrisamiller at 10:43 AM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


What can you do to jazz up a grilled cheese? Well, are you tickling the balls?
posted by klangklangston at 10:43 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


Guacamole. Seriously. I tried it in place of mayo on a BLT and it was amazing. I bet it would also be amazing on grilled cheese. And fatty, but if you are eating grilled cheese you don't care about that.
posted by DU at 10:44 AM on September 10, 2010


Anchovies. And for god's sake don't use any orange-coloured cheeses.
posted by molecicco at 10:44 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


Seriously, do we need to overthink a plate of cheese, bread, and butter a second time because someone can't skip a question?
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 10:45 AM on September 10, 2010


Are there any other things I can add to my Cheerios that might piss me off more?

Grilled cheese?
posted by iconomy at 10:45 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


Way off topic- but this post in the "how to cook a steak" question:

10. EAT THE SHIT OUT OF IT WITH A BOTTLE OF SOME BIG-ASS, PUNCH-YOU-IN-THE-FACE RED WINE.
posted by TheBones at 10:46 AM on September 10, 2010


If you don't like it, flag it and move on, for fuck's sake. When did MeTa become the place to post about anything and everything that pisses you off?

Well, always? I mean, Meta has been here before flagging.
posted by smackfu at 10:46 AM on September 10, 2010


There was--for a brief shining moment--a bar up the road from my house, dedicated to awesome grilled cheese combos and fancy cocktails. I weep that we did not go every week while it was open.

So, I am totally forcing Guy to eat gruyere & pear grilled cheese for dinner. I'm thinking Blue Moon cocktail to go with? Someone have a better suggestion?
posted by crush-onastick at 10:47 AM on September 10, 2010


Whelk, how else am I supposed to make a grilled cheese if not in a pan? Actually grilling it makes an unholy mess of drippy cheese. (Unless I'm using too much cheese...NO WAIT THAT IS SCANDALOUS TO EVEN SUGGEST.)

That said, Irish butties are best when fried with Irish butter. Irish cows must be tremendously happy to produce such lovely cream.
posted by catlet at 10:47 AM on September 10, 2010


And what about deconstructing a grilled cheese- put a piece of bread and a piece of cheese on a plate- serve.
posted by TheBones at 10:47 AM on September 10, 2010


I have been wanting a cubano all week. Sadly the few options in Portland are not close enough for me to go and get one during my measly half hour lunch break (plus, they aren't amazing). I guess it's like my mother used to say, if you want anything done, you have to do it yourself. Except cleaning my room, that's something she wanted done but would chase me around the house to get me to do.
posted by DrGirlfriend at 10:47 AM on September 10, 2010


I have just learned with great sadness that the Envoy Restaurant in Milwaukee has discontinued its Ultimate Grilled Cheese (bacon, tomato, pesto, and five cheeses on toasted ciabatta).
posted by jedicus at 10:48 AM on September 10, 2010


Blazecock Pileon: "Beans [and on] toast are good on a cold day. Especially when the beans are almost hot enough to burn the roof of your mouth, and then you wait, and wait, and wait for that special moment when that hot mess has cooled down enough to grab the buttery toast, pick it up and scoop in some toast and beans. Yum"

Damn you, I drooled on my shirt.
posted by subbes at 10:48 AM on September 10, 2010


Flag it, spread brown mustard on the inside of the bread and move on.
posted by tommasz at 10:49 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


My fundamentalist christian, Israeli, Republican, declawed, uncircumcised lawyer likes to grill cheese, should I tell him/her not to forget the taters?
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 10:50 AM on September 10, 2010


I have lots of cheese but no bread. *cries*

Batter two slices of cheese and fry them. Put a slice of cheese between. Ta-Fuckin'-Da!
posted by Babblesort at 10:51 AM on September 10, 2010 [4 favorites]


For some people, grilled cheese is very important! He even dumped her (scroll down a bit) because she wouldn't make him a grilled cheese sandwich.
posted by Melismata at 10:51 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


you're calling out a goddamn grilled cheese thread?

In the days and years ahead, however futile and pointless my life may become, I can look back on this moment and tell myself that I never called out a grilled cheese thread.

Also, fresh basil. I've never tried it, but I'll bet fresh tarragon would be pretty good, too.
posted by octobersurprise at 10:54 AM on September 10, 2010


I have lots of cheese but no bread. *cries*

Or shred some cheese up, broil it on parchment paper until you have crispy little cheese wafers, then put whatever you want between them. It doesn't matter what it is. It will be delicious between crispy cheese wafers.
posted by generichuman at 10:57 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


You fools! When will you realize that a grilled cheese sandwich is just a cheese pizza folded in half!
posted by blue_beetle at 10:59 AM on September 10, 2010


I have lots of cheese but no bread. *cries*

I have neither bread nor cheese. Hmm, has there ever been a grocery shopping meetup?
posted by FishBike at 11:00 AM on September 10, 2010


I have neither bread nor cheese.

This is slowly turning into the gift of the magi.
posted by The Whelk at 11:01 AM on September 10, 2010 [12 favorites]


Oh - I didn't see this either - going to read it now!

The only question I do have is Nanukthedog's point that it is a repeat question. I thought repeat questions were frowned upon, though I can see that it would be really annoying to do delete all the variations of the same question.

That said, if the mods had to let one slip by, I'm glad it's this one.

Cheesetastic.
posted by anitanita at 11:02 AM on September 10, 2010


JC had open heart surgery. His doctor advised him to avoid grilled cheese sandwiches. Ever clever, JC toasted 2 slices of bread, put some cheese between them and microwaved the result to melt the cheese. No grill was involved in this procedure.
posted by Cranberry at 11:03 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


I get that it's fine, but one thing that's vaguely bothered me--not enough for it to be a real thing, just niggling--is that I feel like I must've been on AskMe for too long because it's starting to feel cyclical, the same questions come up every couple years, whether it's relationships or food/recipes or gift giving. I get that that's been OKed now by the mods, but it makes you realize there are no new questions, just cycles of dilemmas and need, or something. And you get so you don't bother answering after the 5th question about how to make X, at least that's how I feel. But I get this is not an actual problem, I'm just idly venting I suppose.
posted by ifjuly at 11:04 AM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


When will you realize that a grilled cheese sandwich is just a cheese pizza folded in half!

Infidel!
posted by grouse at 11:06 AM on September 10, 2010


Seriously, do we need to overthink a plate of cheese, bread, and butter a second time because someone can't search?

Fine, no pecan pie for you!
posted by nomadicink at 11:06 AM on September 10, 2010


This is slowly turning into the gift of the magi.

More like rock soup.
posted by 2bucksplus at 11:07 AM on September 10, 2010


Finally, a MetaTalk thread where recipes are appropriate...
posted by Ian A.T. at 11:07 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


Kind of like finding out that people stand to wipe. I mean, seriously, WTF?

Seriously though WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?
posted by kate blank at 11:08 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


with cheese from lebanon and some hummus...
the grilled cheese thread asking
what is rational in 2.0.

cheese day


posted by clavdivs at 11:09 AM on September 10, 2010


....AN<AN...magine having a real database like some secret peoples. sumin. 'grilled cheese' would get...
(no wagering)....83,729 hits.
oh what reading that would make.
posted by clavdivs at 11:13 AM on September 10, 2010


I inadvertently ended up here and while it wasn't what I wanted, I thought the larger of the picture on the left depicted the approximate metatalk post very well. But what's really interesting is the picture of our three mods immediately below that.
posted by Wolfdog at 11:14 AM on September 10, 2010 [6 favorites]


"Depicted the approximate metatalk post?" I have no idea. Obviously I didn't mean to type those words in that order, but you might like them better that way anyway.
posted by Wolfdog at 11:15 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


Metafilter: like a grilled cheese but better, faster, and deadlier
posted by pointystick at 11:15 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


I personally would prefer a moratorium on the "Google it, duh" sorts of answers in AskMe. Often people have googled what they are asking and still want input from Metafilter members. It irks me.
posted by josher71 at 11:17 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


BACONBACONBACON.
posted by iamabot at 11:17 AM on September 10, 2010


I personally would prefer a moratorium on the "Google it, duh" sorts of answers in AskMe

If they've got no other useful information, we'll often delete those.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:19 AM on September 10, 2010


Does anyone want quesadillas?
posted by zinfandel at 11:20 AM on September 10, 2010


Google can be extremely overwhelming. Sorting through the eight billion possibilities that google returns is part of the beauty of AskMe. Not to mention that if you're truly clueless about a subject, it can be hard to figure out the correct search terms in the first place. I mean, the point of AskMe is getting input from real people instead of just trusting whatever happens to be on the first page of google results.
posted by stoneweaver at 11:20 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


Boo, boo to grilled cheese sandwiches. I don't think I've eaten one in maybe 20 years, and I hope never to eat one again. Ditto on mac and cheese (vile), and tuna fish sandwiches, which is the first food I ever had the force of will to refuse as a child, at age 4 or 5. Disgusting.

Like the OP of this thread, though, I feel like we're continually venturing into chatfilter these days. "What can I put on my grilled cheese sandwich" strikes me as no different than "What's your favorite album" (or, for that matter, "What's the definitive album for any and every genre of music" from yesterday).

If there is going to be a chatfilter rule, questions that simply invite subjective answers should be barred.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 11:21 AM on September 10, 2010


Wolfdog, that was kind of awesome.
posted by TheBones at 11:22 AM on September 10, 2010


But what's really interesting is the picture of our three mods immediately below that.

Mr. Clean is obviously Jessamyn.
posted by zinfandel at 11:22 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


The Whelk: An irish butty is like a grilled cheese, but you fry it in the pan. Ideally in bacon fat. So it's like a grilled cheese but better, faster, and deadlier.

I'm being perfectly honest when I say I didn't realize that was a thing... not that I thought I made it up myself, but I didn't realize it had a name awesome.

(Also awesome... putting a burger in the middle.)
posted by MCMikeNamara at 11:24 AM on September 10, 2010


Are there any other things I can add to my Cheerios that might piss me off more?

Antifreeze.
posted by blucevalo at 11:24 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


"What's the definitive album for any and every genre of music"

Did you click through to the more inside of that question? The guy is a paramedic. He asks people who are getting transported in his ambulance what their favorite type of music is. He then has an assortment of "good examples of the type" ready so that they can listen to something they [assumedly might] like while they're getting transported to the hospital. It's the polar opposite of chatfilter, it solves a problem in a creative and itneresting way.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:24 AM on September 10, 2010 [23 favorites]


I just consumed a Guinness but no grilled cheese sandwich, there's neither bread nor cheese in my current location. All I could think about was how awesome the sandwich would pair with the boldness of the Guinness. And now I'm thinking about what other awesome simple-sandwiches-and-beer combos would be great...
posted by Meagan at 11:26 AM on September 10, 2010


Batter two slices of cheese and fry them. Put a slice of cheese between. Ta-Fuckin'-Da!

I didn't do this, but it did give me an idea.

Or shred some cheese up, broil it on parchment paper until you have crispy little cheese wafers, then put whatever you want between them. It doesn't matter what it is. It will be delicious between crispy cheese wafers.

No, not this, although that's cool if you like crispy rather than melty cheese, but I was already downstairs cooking when you posted this.
Deconstructed Grilled Cheese Sandwich

1. Thinly slice some fresh basil and coarsely shred a reasonable amount of cheddar cheese. Mix, then gently press into a patty about the size of a 3-4 ounce hamburger, fairly thin.

2. Beat an egg with a little Dijon mustard and some black pepper in a bowl large enough to hold a patty, but not too large. Put the cheese patty in the bowl and let it soak for a few minutes, flipping and basting so that the egg gets all over and some way inside the patty.

3. In another bowl, mix breadcrumbs, salt, pepper, maybe some dried parsley, and, of course, some finely grated Parmesan.

4. In a hot, greased pan (butter and oil combo is great), cook the patty on one side until browned. The cheese will start oozing out a bit, so now flip it until it's brown on the other side, too.

5. EAT!

6. Go back to the kitchen, look sadly at the leftover eggs with a couple of shreds of cheese and the bit of remaining breading mixture, shrug, and pour both into the newly-hot pan and make a little bready-cheesy-eggy scramble. It will do as dessert.
posted by maudlin at 11:26 AM on September 10, 2010 [8 favorites]


Did you click through to the more inside of that question?

How many flags did that get anyways?
posted by smackfu at 11:28 AM on September 10, 2010


If they've got no other useful information, we'll often delete those.

I totally appreciate that from the mods. It's the "lmgtfy" crowd that really get the "old man writing a letter to the editor to complain" juices flowing.
posted by josher71 at 11:29 AM on September 10, 2010


And how about that new anonymous question about how to commit tax fraud? I answered the one factual part, I imagine every other answer will be "this is illegal".
posted by smackfu at 11:30 AM on September 10, 2010


Kind of like finding out that people stand to wipe. I mean, seriously, WTF?

Hmmm. I used to do that too, until Metafilter changed my life forever.

Perhaps I should give this grilled cheese sandwich thing a second thought.
posted by bondcliff at 11:35 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


Also awesome... putting a burger in the middle

Not to be pedantic, but a patty melt is not a grilled cheese.
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 11:36 AM on September 10, 2010


Don't add toppings to your grilled cheese. Turn your grilled cheese into a topping. My favorite meal at my favorite diner in the world (Casper's, Springfield MO) is a grilled cheese and a bowl of chili, tearing up the grilled cheese and tossing the chunks into the overflowing bowl.

I'm going to die, but at least I lived first.
posted by Bookhouse at 11:39 AM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


Boo, boo to grilled cheese sandwiches. I don't think I've eaten one in maybe 20 years, and I hope never to eat one again.

Whatever, dude. More for us.
posted by rtha at 11:41 AM on September 10, 2010 [6 favorites]


That's it. I am making a grilled cheese sandwich. Right. Now. YOU CAN'T STOP ME.

I won't be putting them on the sandwich, but I will definitely be enjoying some pickles on the side. Because I am that pregnant lady. And pickles go with everything. They really do.
posted by sonika at 11:42 AM on September 10, 2010


Haa, I thought we were still on grilled cheese = oral sex. This is much less fun when it's really just about sandwiches. Although yeah, bacon, tomato, and oral sex is pretty fucking great.
posted by Mister_A at 11:42 AM on September 10, 2010


Around the clock used to make anything you asked for it was late enough. One friend after a show got a grilled waffle cheese sandwich. With ham. We just kinda watched him to see if he would die mid-chew.
posted by The Whelk at 11:43 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


I just made a grilled cheese sandwich. It was tasty. Sharp cheddar, basil, parmesan, salt and pepper, and mayo on the outside. Was not bad. Next time maybe I'll mix it up a little.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:49 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


ooo, Basil. I have some Basil.....
posted by The Whelk at 11:50 AM on September 10, 2010


Seriously, do we need to overthink a plate of cheese, bread, and butter a second time because someone can't search?

There are new people joining everyday. Maybe someone new has a genius idea for something completely delicious or a link to a new website. And sliced cheese (not from Kraft) is expensive, as is good bread (for those of us who are worried about money but would still like to eat good food). I'd rather not waste ingredients I've bought. (Yeah, I'm cheap. So what?)
posted by anniecat at 11:50 AM on September 10, 2010


I thought we were still on grilled cheese = oral sex

I think that was cupcakes. Grill cheese is more like dry humping.
posted by bondcliff at 11:51 AM on September 10, 2010


And how about that new anonymous question about how to commit tax fraud?

A question where someone asks "Am I going to get in trouble for this? Is there a way to not get in trouble?" and a bunch of people answer "Yep, yep you probably will. Nope, there may not be." is fine. I appreciate that to some people it sounds like "Help me commit tax fraud!" in their minds, but that's between them and their internal monologues, not us.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:52 AM on September 10, 2010


And by "waste ingredients" I mean the apple and cheddar grilled cheese I tried to make that tasted terrible because I found it on epicurious and it sounded good and it wasn't.
posted by anniecat at 11:52 AM on September 10, 2010


Someone is making an assortment of conceptual grilled cheese sandwiches while playing hooky on their own callout thread. Someone.
posted by setanor at 11:52 AM on September 10, 2010


I want some grilled cheese now. Yes, with a little bit of brown mustard on top.

Twenty bucks, same as in town, hon.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 11:53 AM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


The guy is a paramedic. He asks people who are getting transported in his ambulance what their favorite type of music is.

Bring this paramedic hence the better that I may cover his upturned face in a thousand tender kisses.
posted by Jofus at 11:54 AM on September 10, 2010 [7 favorites]


I went out with this lady years ago, third or fourth time we got together she asked me over for lunch and served me tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. I thought OH MY GOD YOU HAVE WON MY HEART FOREVER.

I didn't work out. It never really got off the ground, actually. That was a good grill cheese sandwich though. I'm not that cheap anymore either, I'd probably need some tomato on the sandwich today.
posted by marxchivist at 11:54 AM on September 10, 2010


That's it. I am making a grilled cheese sandwich. Right. Now.

How do you do that and work a keyboard at the same time? More so, how do you see the screen with someone's "parts" in your face?
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 11:55 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


My favorite part about making MeTa threads along the lines of "I don't like this thread about X" is that the MeTa thread inevitably also becomes about X, so not only have you doubled the number of active X threads, but now one of them is authored by you.
posted by SpiffyRob at 11:56 AM on September 10, 2010 [20 favorites]


MeTa is a pit of deep cheesy irony.
posted by The Whelk at 11:58 AM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


"What's the definitive album for any and every genre of music"

Did you click through to the more inside of that question? ... It's the polar opposite of chatfilter, it solves a problem in a creative and itneresting way.


Reasonable minds may differ, but it still strikes me as chatfiltery. Yes, it's an interesting setting for a chatty question. But if, for example, "What's your favorite song" is chatfilter, then surely "What's your favorite song? I'm a bus driver who likes to play music that entertains passengers" must also be chatfilter.

Same thing goes for the perennial "I'm writing a book," which I think we've discussed before. If "How can I kill my neighbor's dog and not get caught" is bad, "I'm writing a book in which a character kills his neighbor's dog in an untraceable way--how?" is just as bad.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 12:01 PM on September 10, 2010


I would love to know how many Mefites made a grilled cheese sandwich today due to that question and this discussion.
posted by punchtothehead at 12:03 PM on September 10, 2010


My husband makes the most badass, perfectly toasted, golden-brown on the outside,
creamy-melty-on-the-inside grilled cheese sammich I have ever had. You can not touch this; do not even try, with your basil, mayo, bacon, or anything else. Oh honey, what time is dinner gonna be ready?
posted by Lynsey at 12:03 PM on September 10, 2010


I'm working on my callout post for this callout. I'll be back in 45 with my 13 reasons why this callout is a bad callout. Feel free to start your callouts of my callout in the interim.
posted by Ironmouth at 12:22 PM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


On vacation in New England recently, my boyfriend had TWO grilled cheese sandwiches, with a hamburger patty in between them. It was awesome.

Ok. I'm done now.
posted by OneMonkeysUncle at 12:26 PM on September 10, 2010


Can you outline some of your key ideas in a powerpoint, Ironmouth? That will help me with the tertiary callout I'm developing.
posted by Mister_A at 12:27 PM on September 10, 2010


The 10th Regiment of Foot:
Also awesome... putting a burger in the middle

Not to be pedantic, but a patty melt is not a grilled cheese.


You're totally right. And unlike the irish butty, I knew that that was called something else. (I don't think most patty melts are fried in bacon fat but I may be mistaken.)
posted by MCMikeNamara at 12:27 PM on September 10, 2010


What is a reasonable price for grilled cheese?
posted by Mister_A at 12:28 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


OneMonkeysUncle, we used to call the hamburger between two grilled cheeses a "#@(*&%^ Blagojevich" around here, but sadly, like the Ribwich, it is no more. (I think.)
posted by MCMikeNamara at 12:32 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


True story: I was settling down in the school library for a long day of homework, read that thread, and immediately packed up all my stuff. I drove to my apartment all the way across town, stopping to pick up ingredients on the way, and am now making a grilled cheese sandwich.

I'm not sure if that speaks more to the power of suggestion in that AskMe question or to my desire to really really not do this homework.
posted by lilac girl at 12:37 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


I don't think most patty melts are fried in bacon fat

BY GOD The ones in my home will be from now on!!
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 12:38 PM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


I'm not sure if that speaks more to the power of suggestion in that AskMe question or to my desire to really really not do this homework.

You're not alone, I have big grilled cheese sandwich plans this weekend.
posted by nomadicink at 12:43 PM on September 10, 2010


Same here, I'd have done it already if I had any decent cheese in the house. I have mollified myself with some Nutella and raspberry jam on whole wheat, but tomorrow will be the Grilled Cheesening.
posted by Gator at 12:46 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


if we're mentioning nutella - it's sinful and shouldn't be allowed - but make a fluffernutter and add nutella. if you're really feeling naughty, fry it up in butter like it's a grilled cheese.
posted by nadawi at 12:47 PM on September 10, 2010 [5 favorites]


Grilled cheese with asparagus would be good... ooh grilled cheese with broccoli rabe sauteéd with garlic in olive oil—I could call that the Grilled Cheese Italiano!
posted by Mister_A at 12:50 PM on September 10, 2010


What is a reasonable price for grilled cheese?

It's probably about 20 dollars where you are, which is just about what you would pay for it if you went into town, from what I understand.
posted by iconomy at 12:59 PM on September 10, 2010 [4 favorites]


Hi Nanukthedog,

Apologies if my question (or lack of creativity?) offended you. I actually did search, and found the one about the types of cheese but it wasn't quite what I was looking for. The answers people have posted to my question, however, are, including a link to a thread about a "grilled cheese party" which I missed in my initial search.
posted by torisaur at 1:02 PM on September 10, 2010


But if, for example, "What's your favorite song" is chatfilter, then surely "What's your favorite song? I'm a bus driver who likes to play music that entertains passengers" must also be chatfilter.

No, it's really not. Our basic criteria on AskMe is that there has to be a problem to be solved and it should, ideally, be stated. There needs to be a way to distinguish better answers from worse answers and the question needs to not look like a thinly veiled attempt to basically just talk about something. I know it's weird because, I totally agree with you, both questions that you outline are really asking "What's your favorite song" but one has criteria for asking, ways to differentiate. So I guess maybe I'd show the difference by

"What's your favorite medical murder mystery author? I really like Tess Gerritsen but can't stomach Kathy Reichs. Suggestions?" versus "What's your favorite medical murder mystery author?" sometimes, it's true we fill in the blanks for the question the OP seems to be asking, but generally speaking asking for peopel's favorites isn't the problem, it's not having a reason you're asking.

And I dislike the "I'm writing a book" loophole personally and if we think people are being cutesy with it we'll not be that psyched, but legitimately we have a lot of writers here and if it helps them write something more pleasingly or more realistically, that seems to be good news. And these are just site guidelines, not real world guidelines. I don't think there's anything at all asking people what their favorite gelato is, it just doesn't make a really good AskMe question.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 1:02 PM on September 10, 2010


Jessamyn, I take your point. These kinds of questions don't really leave me irate or anything, they just invoke a rumbling "meh" from my innards.

Which, to return this callout thread to its ineluctable and unstoppable derail, is precisely the kind of deep rumbling that one of those horrible grilled cheese sandwich produces in me. Bah! Also, humbug! And, what's more, your favorite sandwich sucks!

Cuban sandwiches forever!
posted by Admiral Haddock at 1:18 PM on September 10, 2010


Still speaking of food, I'm so glad somebody posted that steak Q, because I never realized you could make one in a cast-iron skillet. I loooooove my cast-iron skillet; always looking for things to feed it!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 1:22 PM on September 10, 2010


OneMonkeysUncle, the Vortex (burger joint in Atlanta) does the grilled-cheese-as-bun thing on a burger called the Double Bypass Burger: "Topped with two fried eggs, six slices of American cheese, and eight slices of bacon, all served between the two
grilled cheese sandwiches that we use in place of the regular hamburger buns."

(This replaced the burger that used Krispy Kremes instead of buns because that got too trendy.)
posted by catlet at 1:23 PM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


If you don't like good, honest, by-the-guidelines questions about grilled cheese sandwiches, then maybe you need to go make your own metafilter. Those questions are like getting my five bones back every time.
posted by Shohn at 1:28 PM on September 10, 2010


Wait if an irish butty is specifically done in a pan...

Where the heck are the rest of you frying a plain old grilled cheese?

I suppose the name would imply "a grill", but I've never, ever heard of someone doing it in anything other than a pan.
posted by utsutsu at 1:30 PM on September 10, 2010


now I want a cubano desperately and the Cuban deli is a billion miles across town. I will not make it before I have to be in class.

Is statistics more important than a sammich? I am not sure that it is.
posted by winna at 1:30 PM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


Must have loved my ice cream question...
posted by edgeways at 1:39 PM on September 10, 2010


My perspective:
Collectively you've spoken. Jessamyn spoke (for the mods). nickjadlowe pointed out that I welcome memails on food questions and asserted that he was surprised that I would callout a food related question. Clearly the question is valid from a mefi community perspective.

Personally, I'll push back to nickjadlowe that before I posted a callout, I did consider posting to the question. But after literally having a dozen ingredients on the tip of my tounge instantly I called it out because - in my world - I can't fathom a person not realizing that there are other things you can stick on a grilled cheese sandwich. Seriously. I can't. Every culture has a cheese, a bread, and a fat that they stick together to make something akin to a grilled cheese sandwich. They aren't new, revolutionary or surprising. This is peasant food in its purest form.

Now, before you all go nuts on those last two statements - I love - and I mean love peasant food, cultural variety, and even specifically grilled cheese. (Incidentally I had grilled cheese last night.)

Cheese, bread, and fat are basically the three cultural food markers for a given civilization, for a give society, for a given region, and for a given family if you hunt for it. There is almost nothing more basic and pure.

I can't think of a single food that cannot be paired with cheese and bread and have it taste good. Sure, there are specific cheeses that things might not taste good with, as well as specific breads that might be horrible, but dear god - these are seriously as basic as you can get.

Fish? Tuna Melt.
Beef? Burger, patty melt,
Pork? Cuban, bacon and cheese, BCLTs

Apple wood smoked bacon? Apples... blah blah blah

Veggies? Asparagus, Spinach, Tomatoes, c'mon folks... you've all jumped all over this already - this is common knowledge and easily accessible by european derivitive cultures and most of the others that were imperialized.

Hell even Oranges and lemons, when paired with a hard cheese thin sliced (if you can't get to a real cheese shop, I'm thinking something in the realm of manchego in base flavor and firmness), maybe with a pinch of cayenne grilled with a tarragon butter would be nice - or go the other way and candy the oranges and lemons, use a goat cheese or cottage cheese and then serve it on thin slices of brioche. Seriously.

And as such, culturally, we're showing some solidarity by each bringing forth one or two things, giving eachother hugs with +1s because we thought of that idea too but we didn't want to hog all the good ideas, and we wanted to make sure one or two of our own got out before someone else who thought of the same ones got to write out the same ones... We spend our time talking about onion carmelization, and crispy vs. thick cut bacon, applewood smoked bacon, avocados... and seriously... its a plate of beans folks.

...and now I've contributed all I will on the subject - which I'm sure some of you are glad to hear.
posted by Nanukthedog at 1:40 PM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]



I suppose the name would imply "a grill", but I've never, ever heard of someone doing it in anything other than a pan.


You've never met my Mom.
posted by The Whelk at 1:42 PM on September 10, 2010


What is a grilled cheese sandwich?
posted by two lights above the sea at 1:47 PM on September 10, 2010


Or my mum. She always made them in the oven (which were good in their own way). I was an adult before I had a fried cheese sandwich.
posted by deborah at 1:51 PM on September 10, 2010


Yeah, Whelk's mom makes the best grilled cheese sandwiches. At least, that's what all the guys on the construction site tell me.
posted by UbuRoivas at 1:53 PM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


Oranges and lemons, when paired with a hard cheese thin sliced (if you can't get to a real cheese shop, I'm thinking something in the realm of manchego in base flavor and firmness), maybe with a pinch of cayenne grilled with a tarragon butter would be nice - or go the other way and candy the oranges and lemons, use a goat cheese or cottage cheese and then serve it on thin slices of brioche.

Why didn't you just post this to the thread? Those are all very unique and interesting ideas.

We spend our time talking about onion carmelization, and crispy vs. thick cut bacon, applewood smoked bacon, avocados...

I guess you consider all of these options embarrasingly obvious and yourself to be a food buff with "a dozen ingredients on the tip of [your] tounge instantly," but there are people who consider avocados "exotic" and wouldn't think to even eat them, much less pair them with grilled cheese.

Maybe those tame suggestions are legitimately blowing their minds right now. Maybe they're trying avocado for the first time and expanding their horizons! Why would you be at all exasperated about that?

I rarely weigh in on MeTa threads, but honestly I find your comment condescending. If your suggestions are so cool, just pop them into the AskMe thread, collect your +1's and be done with it.
posted by cranberrymonger at 1:57 PM on September 10, 2010 [30 favorites]


(Also awesome... putting a burger in the middle.)

What, like this?
posted by dersins at 1:57 PM on September 10, 2010


You've never met my Mom.

Yeah, Whelk's mom makes the best grilled cheese sandwiches. At least, that's what all the guys on the construction site tell me.

Her grilled cheese sandwich brings all the boys to the yard?

That was grosser sounding than I thought it would be.
posted by utsutsu at 1:58 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


damn right they're better then yours, damn right they're better then yours, I could teach you but ....
posted by The Whelk at 2:02 PM on September 10, 2010


other
posted by darkmatter at 2:06 PM on September 10, 2010


For the best grilled cheese sandwich, one must travel back in time to 1976 and order one at the now-defunct (except for one) restaurant chain "Sambo's." That is the one true grilled cheese sandwich, and there you are, surrounded by somewhat confusing, vaguely racist imagery. There is also milk.
posted by Skot at 2:06 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


You realize that the main effect of this callout will be to make the AskMe thread much more popular, right?
posted by John Cohen at 2:18 PM on September 10, 2010


That thread made me want to dust off my jaffle iron.
posted by squeak at 2:19 PM on September 10, 2010


You realize that the main effect of this callout will be to make the AskMe thread much more popular, right?

If we all work together to eat 10,000 grilled cheese sandwiches, we might stop this runaway train.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 2:21 PM on September 10, 2010


All I know is that since posting that damn steak question, I'm suffering to no end, because I want to go and try a bunch of the things suggested, but I still have to work for another couple of hours.

I'm seriously considering going home steak sick.
posted by quin at 2:23 PM on September 10, 2010


I'll just link to my previous comment on this sort of thing since I think this has been handled. Also MMMnom grilled cheese.
posted by sweetkid at 2:24 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


i hadn't considered the possibility of citrus and now that i am, i'm gobsmacked. i even consider myself a foodie of sorts.

..."there are more things in heaven and earth, horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy" and all that.

it's like complaining that someone asked how to cook eggs - sure, there a million ways i can think of immediately, and it's freaking easy to cook an egg - yet chefs are judged and hired on their ability to make a single egg. the gulf between passable and expert is huge. i think the same can be said for most food. the more basic the meal, the more room there is for excellence and imagination. isn't that why we enjoy cooking?
posted by nadawi at 2:28 PM on September 10, 2010


Garlic, garlic, garlic.
posted by Iron Rat at 2:37 PM on September 10, 2010


True Story: Last week I was walking around with a British friend in the middle of the desert at about 3am. He's hobbling around on a crutch and all of a sudden announces he's hungry for a grilled cheese sandwich. I laugh and say "Where are you going to find a grilled cheese out here?" He looks back over his shoulder and says there's a diner out there giving them away. At this point we're yelling at one another. A group of guys cruising by on bikes overhear and chase after him.
Random Guy : "The last time I followed a Brit into the desert, baaaadddd things happened!"
So I think to myself, if those guys can put trust in this random dude's word, I should too, considering he's my friend. So I follow and sure as shit, there's a full on 50's diner out there serving coffee and grilled cheese, and the waitresses are all done up in wigs and dancing to 50's rock n roll music.

disclaimer: I may or may not have been at Burning Man. It was hard to tell with all the lsd in my system...
posted by mannequito at 2:43 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


Watermelon in the melon.
posted by gman at 2:55 PM on September 10, 2010


Wait, wait, wait. Is Nanukthedog the same person who posted the portobello thread? Because they both have the same appalling condescentation towards people who don't have a complete knowledge of food.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 2:56 PM on September 10, 2010


MiHail, the author of that classic thread, passed away several years ago.
posted by Gator at 2:58 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


That AskMe question should have been made as anonymous to really put undies in a bunch.

The real problem in AskMe lies with a different topic. Delenda est relationship-filter!
posted by Argyle at 3:05 PM on September 10, 2010


"Now, before you all go nuts on those last two statements - I love - and I mean love peasant food..."

heh, that made me smile. "peasant food" indeed.

Personally I prefer poor people food, food eaten by people less than me, simple food, from the ghetto and the barrio, food from the dust bowl and the riverbanks, from the other side of the tracks, from down in the boondocks, from the ville. THAT's the kind of food I like.
posted by HuronBob at 3:22 PM on September 10, 2010 [7 favorites]


giving eachother hugs with +1s because we thought of that idea too but we didn't want to hog all the good ideas

Phew, that is a grave misunderstanding of the way I (at least) am using favorites in that particular thread.

Rest assured, those whose grilled cheese suggestions I have favorited: I am not hugging you. Jeez, I barely know you! I bookmarked your suggestion because I don't want to forget to make that sandwich.

Afterwards, depending upon how successful your suggestion was, well... there might be inappropriate hugging. I'm passionate about sandwiches.
posted by Elsa at 3:35 PM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


MMMMMM peasants.
posted by TheBones at 3:37 PM on September 10, 2010


Grilled cheese with peasants.
posted by TheBones at 3:38 PM on September 10, 2010


That's what Trogdor said.
posted by Gator at 3:39 PM on September 10, 2010 [6 favorites]


Would "poor people food" be mcdonalds?
posted by TheBones at 3:41 PM on September 10, 2010


That depends which country you live in. In less developed nations, McDonalds is a luxury for the middle class. I'm more curious who these people less than HuronBob are?
posted by gman at 3:49 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'm less than HuronBob. I mean, have you seen the dude? He contains multitudes!
posted by dersins at 4:00 PM on September 10, 2010


FishBike: "I have neither bread nor cheese. Hmm, has there ever been a grocery shopping meetup"

Yes.
posted by The corpse in the library at 4:10 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


linking to unrelated threads deleted at the user's request seems icky.
posted by nadawi at 4:18 PM on September 10, 2010


I DECLARE TODAY! SEPTEMBER 10th TO BE GRILLED CHEESE DAY IN THE FEDERATED KINGDOM OF METAFILTER.

LET THERE BE MUCH REJOICING.

posted by The Whelk at 4:27 PM on September 10, 2010 [5 favorites]


Oh, come on, if we can't have The Ballad of Fr0zen and Xteraco, what can we have?
posted by dersins at 4:28 PM on September 10, 2010 [4 favorites]


Its asking if we can write every itteration of cheese+bread+some special ingredient down.


I don't think so, as grilled cheese doesn't go well so with ice cream or coffee grounds.


I actually had grilled cheese yesterday made with a mild white cheddar cheese that had been rubbed with ground coffee and lavender. I would also eat grilled cheese with tomato basil granita, though that's not quite ice cream. Though I am not a fan of bacon ice cream or foie gras ice cream, they might be improved with grilled cheese. I have made grilled goat cheese on chocolate cherry bread, and I imagine rocking that with some salted caramel ice cream could be pretty satisfying.
posted by oneirodynia at 4:44 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


Much like Earth Day, every day is Grilled Cheese Day, chez nous.
posted by everichon at 4:48 PM on September 10, 2010


Um, the OP already has a few "favorites" on askme that are all about bread, cheese, and putting bread on cheese...so the OP knows they exist...why do a repeat question?
posted by hal_c_on at 5:02 PM on September 10, 2010


My birthday is a holiday for grilled cheese!

29 keeps getting better. (I got a job yesterday, going out tonight, and now, grilled cheese. This day is big enough for the two of us.)
posted by bilabial at 5:09 PM on September 10, 2010


hal you've gone right back through the wormhole to the beginning of the thread.
posted by Mister_A at 5:11 PM on September 10, 2010


QUICK EVERYONE CHECK THEIR PIPS IN RELATION TO THE CARD DEALT TO THEM IN POKER!
posted by The Whelk at 5:20 PM on September 10, 2010


If there is anything more than cheese between the bread, it ceases to be grilled cheese. That's called a melt, dummy.
posted by Sys Rq at 5:39 PM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]



Personally I prefer poor people food, food eaten by people less than me, simple food, from the ghetto and the barrio, food from the dust bowl and the riverbanks, from the other side of the tracks, from down in the boondocks, from the ville. THAT's the kind of food I like.


So you are know that Government Cheese grilled cheese sandwiches are totally amazing.
posted by louche mustachio at 5:42 PM on September 10, 2010


tuna fish sandwiches, which is the first food I ever had the force of will to refuse as a child

Weird. That's all I ever wanted to eat as a child. Circa age five, I hated hamburgers, hot dogs, pizza, and all the other mainstays of childhood cuisine. All I ever wanted was tuna salad sandwiches. A limitless supply of tuna salad sandwiches.
posted by Greg Nog at 5:53 PM on September 10, 2010


A limitless supply of tuna salad sandwiches.

There are some foods that pregnant ladies are advised not to eat. Among them, tuna. I'm not really enthused about ingesting mercury in the first place and I can only imagine that it's not going to enhance my fetus in any way (unless it's like adamantium, which would be awesome), so it's one of the only foods that I've personally been avoiding.

I was at my parents' house over the weekend and at least six times, my mother asked me if I wanted her to make me a tuna fish sandwich. It got pretty hilarious. In the end, I did ask for a snack (this is a woman offering to make a pregnant lady some food - who says no to that?) and it was a grilled cheese sandwich.

It had fresh basil and it was totally delicious and did not contain any mercury, though the basil did have a few bugs on it. If some March of Dimes study shows "bugs on fresh basil cause dain bramage"... well... sorry fetus, but it was delicious.
posted by sonika at 5:58 PM on September 10, 2010


I DECLARE TODAY! SEPTEMBER 10th TO BE GRILLED CHEESE DAY IN THE FEDERATED KINGDOM OF METAFILTER.


I didn't do it rite, but I just cooked a quiche with smoked salmon, sour cream, cheddar and parmesan. It's cooling as I type. WISH ME LUCK!
posted by Devils Rancher at 5:59 PM on September 10, 2010


tuna fish sandwiches, which is the first food I ever had the force of will to refuse as a child

Weird. That's all I ever wanted to eat as a child.


I ate a bunch of them, for whatever reason (did I like them? was I just being a good boy?) though nursery school, and then put my foot down. The smell, god, even the sight of them makes me queasy.

My father did the same thing with my grandmother, but with eggs. I don't think he's had an egg in 50 years (other than in recipes, natch). We never even had eggs in the house when I was a kid; I don't think I ate an egg until well after college. I loves me some eggs now, though.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 6:04 PM on September 10, 2010


I love that this is inspiring all of us to make grilled cheese tonight. I didn't resist the temptation, and now I'm happy. I did the inside out style one one, linked here. I had seen that video before but forgotten about it. I even walked up to the store to buy some cheddar even though I'm in full on hermit mode tonight.

My tummy thanks you, MeFi!
posted by AlisonM at 6:07 PM on September 10, 2010


Batter two slices of cheese and fry them. Put a slice of cheese between. Ta-Fuckin'-Da!

HOLY SHIT IT TASTES SO FUCKING GOOD
posted by Greg Nog at 6:17 PM on September 10, 2010 [8 favorites]


(unless it's like adamantium, which would be awesome)

Hey greg, Greg_Nog, greg greg greg greg. I have this idea. It is called Project ....G. Basically we feed you tuna fish until you develop superpowers. Y/N?
posted by The Whelk at 6:19 PM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


As long as I get tuna and can be a role model to Jubilee, I guess I'm in.
posted by Greg Nog at 6:29 PM on September 10, 2010


SHE'S SO CONFUSED.
posted by The Whelk at 6:33 PM on September 10, 2010


Cheese Alphabet?

Añejo.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 6:50 PM on September 10, 2010


I was going to have a cheeseburger for breakfast. Then I read this thread. Guess what I'm having now?!
posted by biochemist at 6:52 PM on September 10, 2010


I was one of those weird picky eaters as a kid. I didn't like cheese if it was melted. I didn't like eggs. I didn't like any seafood and a whole bunch of other things. But for some inexplicable reason, I loved tuna sandwiches. Tuna + mayo + celery + white bread and a side of fritos and chocolate milk was my kid happy place. For the longest time I'd tell people "well, I don't like seafood, and I don't eat mayo... except for tuna salad sandwiches" and people would look at me like I was crazy, because tuna isn't even that awesome as fishes go [and certainly not the canned stuff in tuna salad] and mayo? Tuna salad is full of it!

Nowadays if tuna is on sale I'll sometimes make a whole batch of it and eat tuna salad sandwiches for every meal for days.

And I got over the melty cheese thing around high school time. Grilled cheese is so wonderful.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 7:02 PM on September 10, 2010


Not that anyone's asking, but for years I've wanted the bar to be raised a little higher on chatfilter.

As it stands now, as long as an AskMe poster knows the ropes, any question at all can be posed in such a way as to circumvent the "no chatfilter" guideline. So the "no chatfilter" guideline, then, is really more of a "noobcatcher" than anything content-related.

That's pretty damn problematic.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 7:04 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


Man, my local supermarket has local wild troll-caught cold-water tuna, in cans. It's really, really good, and supposedly it has something like 15% of the mercury of standard tuna. I would eat it every day if I could -- at 31 weeks pregnant, that's the ONLY way I'm eating tuna every day -- but the mister is out of work and it's $7 a can.
posted by KathrynT at 7:05 PM on September 10, 2010


Guess what I'm having now?!

Oatmeal? French toast? Scrambled eggs? What am I, a mind reader??
posted by iconomy at 7:06 PM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


Whatever you put on or in your grilled cheese, I don't care, just make sure to include a side of dill pickles.
posted by at the crossroads at 7:10 PM on September 10, 2010


local wild troll-caught cold-water tuna

Did anybody else read this and picture a bunch of wild trolls standing in the water, grabbing tuna as it swims past?
posted by FishBike at 7:11 PM on September 10, 2010 [14 favorites]


Nowadays if tuna is on sale I'll sometimes make a whole batch of it and eat tuna salad sandwiches for every meal for days.

Thats like the ending of the greatest love story I have ever read on metatalk.
posted by hal_c_on at 7:17 PM on September 10, 2010


I just have to appear somewhere in this thread.
posted by fourcheesemac at 7:27 PM on September 10, 2010 [5 favorites]


Guess what I'm having now?!

Oatmeal? French toast? Scrambled eggs? What am I, a mind reader??

posted by 1000monkeys at 7:32 PM on September 10, 2010


you can appear on my plate, fourcheesemac, next to the apples and pickles. and alongside the manhattan.
posted by crush-onastick at 7:37 PM on September 10, 2010


Since this thread needs recipes, how about tossing me some vegetarian ones that meet the Low Fiber guidelines? I have some ideas already (risotto, squash bisque, mac and cheese), but more ideas are always better and I can't be assed to use AskMe, you all know what they're like.
posted by klangklangston at 8:03 PM on September 10, 2010


DTMFA
posted by 1000monkeys at 8:08 PM on September 10, 2010


I am going to burn a grilled cheese sandwich at a ceremony in Florida tomorrow.
posted by bowline at 8:27 PM on September 10, 2010


. For the longest time I'd tell people "well, I don't like seafood, and I don't eat mayo... except for tuna salad sandwiches" and people would look at me like I was crazy,

My BF loves a corned turkey hash but says, I hate every indigent on this alone, but together, they work.
posted by The Whelk at 8:33 PM on September 10, 2010


Since this thread needs recipes, how about tossing me some vegetarian ones that meet the Low Fiber guidelines?

Excerpt:
Eat
* tofu
* smooth peanut butter

Avoid
* all beans, nuts, peas, lentils, and legumes
Um... ?

Scalloped potatoes: Slice up a bunch of potatoes and an onion and chuck 'em into a baking dish. Dump a can of condensed cream of mushroom soup on there. Mix it up a bit. Cover it and shove it in the oven at 375 for 45 or however long the potatoes wanna take. Enjoy.
posted by Sys Rq at 8:35 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


MetaFilter: I hate every indigent on this alone, but together, they work.
posted by Sys Rq at 8:36 PM on September 10, 2010


I can't believe no one has mentioned the total bliss that is the marriage of the tuna sandwich and the grilled cheese: the tuna melt.

I... I can't think about this for too long or the fact that I can't eat one for another 26 weeks is going to break my heart.
posted by sonika at 8:39 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


For the longest time I'd tell people "well, I don't like seafood, and I don't eat mayo... except for tuna salad sandwiches" and people would look at me like I was crazy.

I made it all of the way through high school believing a) that I hated mayonnaise and b) that chicken salad sandwiches were the only edible sandwich.

I only learned the truth in 12th grade, when my mother admitted to me that she had been deliberately hiding the fact that there was mayonnaise in chicken salad. Because I'd been such a picky eater for such a long time, and because I can also be a bit, ahem, stubborn, she'd been worried that if I found out that this hated ingredient was actually an essential part of the one sandwich I would eat, that instead of deciding I really did like mayonnaise after all, I would refuse to eat anymore chicken salad sandwiches on principle. And that would have--for all intents and purposes--removed lunch food from my diet.

I have since realized that up until that point, chicken salad sandwiches were the one thing that always arrived fully-formed on demand out of the kitchen, long after my mom had otherwise stopped making most of my other food for me.
posted by colfax at 8:39 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


Who is Käse Sandwich? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Sandwich. You never knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And like that, poof. He's gone.

Keaton always said, "I don't believe in God, but I'm afraid of him." Well I believe in God, and the only thing that scares me is Käse Sandwich.
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 8:44 PM on September 10, 2010 [2 favorites]


HuronBob;
memail is disabled or I'd handle this privately:

Peasant food is not "oh my god that's horrible". Peasant food is what is available, and to a better degree - local. Read a french countryside cookbook, cross-reference the ingredients to the geographic location and you quickly understand what cheeses, what meats, and what pairings are specific to a region.

In America if you look local and find government cheese and wonderbread and that brings you back to memories of growing up, cold rainy weekend mornings, and maybe some random comfort - more power to you.
posted by Nanukthedog at 8:49 PM on September 10, 2010


oneirodynia " a mild white cheddar cheese that had been rubbed with ground coffee and lavender" thank you for that....this will never again be written on the interwebs! We are unique!

Nanukethedog, I love your username! take a deep breath, it's OK, we love you.
posted by HuronBob at 9:10 PM on September 10, 2010


In that case, substitute my dill pickles with cornichons. I won't complain.
posted by at the crossroads at 9:10 PM on September 10, 2010


I hate every indigent

Because they eat peasant food?
posted by drjimmy11 at 9:17 PM on September 10, 2010


sonika, unless you're just being extra cautious, you can totally eat tuna while you're pregnant. My doc said I could have up to 10 ounces a week, as long as it was the chunk light kind. I gave up sushi and caffeine, and then most of my carbs when I failed my diabeetus test, but you'll pry tuna sandwiches (on low carb bread, dammit) from this pregnant lady's cold, dead hands.
posted by chiababe at 9:28 PM on September 10, 2010


In America if you look local and find government cheese and wonderbread and that brings you back to memories of growing up, cold rainy weekend mornings, and maybe some random comfort - more power to you.

I buy my artisanal wonderbread from the local farmer's market!

Tuna + mayo + celery + white bread and a side of fritos and chocolate milk was my kid happy place.

This is pretty much still my happy place. Damned if I couldn't kill for some chocolate milk right now.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 9:43 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


one time my sister cooked grilled cheese sandwiches and there was this peculiar chewiness to them

turns out she forgot to remove the plastic wrapping
posted by pyramid termite at 9:49 PM on September 10, 2010 [3 favorites]


I DECLARE TODAY! SEPTEMBER 10th TO BE GRILLED CHEESE DAY IN THE FEDERATED KINGDOM OF METAFILTER.

It's a sunny 9/11 afternoon here. Can I still celebrate grilled cheese day?

(actually, i just ate tasty peasant food - jarlsberg & dill pickles on brown country bread, and lemon marinated herrings. peasants eat this kind of stuff, right?)
posted by UbuRoivas at 10:09 PM on September 10, 2010


because - in my world - I can't fathom a person not realizing that there are other things you can stick on a grilled cheese sandwich. Seriously. I can't.

Have you read any food-related questions here? Surely if you have, you're accustomed to the concept of people having vastly different levels of cooking experience?

I'm all foodie and shit too, I even have some freelance food writing experience, but I appreciate that other people have their own neato ideas that may not have occurred to me.
posted by desuetude at 10:26 PM on September 10, 2010 [4 favorites]


Greg Nog, that looks amazing. It may be past lunchtime, but damn if I'm not having an early afternoon grilled cheese sandwich. I may even have a side order of peasants.
posted by arcticseal at 11:41 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]


I put cilantro on my grilled cheese sandwiches.
posted by cj_ at 11:50 PM on September 10, 2010 [1 favorite]



Nanukthedog, you must be a "foodie". Look, a lot of us get it already. You are superior to me in every way due to your fine appreciation of the culinary arts (including the "peasant" food uncultured people such as myself like to eat -- in our natural habitat, natch) and possess incredible skill and knowledge in the preparation of such. You probably don't even own a TV, either.

Why you don't take the opportunity to share your vast knowledge with us savages when one of our kind asks so in a forum designed for that purpose is beyond me though. You choose to be irate at their very existence. That is taking it really far, man.

In protest of this idiotic callout, I am now going to make some ramen and not put anything in it but the MSG packet.
posted by cj_ at 12:18 AM on September 11, 2010 [1 favorite]


In protest of this idiotic callout, I am now going to make some ramen and not put anything in it but the MSG packet.

Of course you know this means war?
posted by cucumber at 12:23 AM on September 11, 2010


I like grilled cheese sandwiches that contain blue cheese.
posted by turgid dahlia at 12:56 AM on September 11, 2010


I like grilled cheese sandwiches that contain blue cheese.

Great pizza topping combination: blue cheese, smoked salmon and red onion. Trust me on this one.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:02 AM on September 11, 2010 [1 favorite]


You know, for a long time now I've suspected that we could do a lot of good by adding a little form to the mod contact page. It would have a list of radial buttons, something like:

what is the problem? (check all that apply)

[ ] I am a new member
[ ] I am a longtime member
[ ] one of my comments was deleted
[ ] one of my posts was deleted
[ ] there are too many posts here that don't reflect my interests
[ ] nobody here has a sense of humor
[ ] everyone here is an unthinking uncaring jerk
[ ] people seem to be ignoring me
[ ] everyone seems to be piling on to me

Now -- and this is the important part -- the send button would be a big yellow button, and the text inside it would read

[AND I AM OUTRAGED!]

The button wouldn't really even have to do anything. I just think having an [AND I AM OUTRAGED] button available to click would do some people an awful lot of good.

But, see, the think is, I never ever thought that I'd be suggesting that we add a

[ ] people are talking about grilled cheese

line to that form. That caught me completely by surprise.
posted by .kobayashi. at 5:30 AM on September 11, 2010 [16 favorites]


But, see, the think is, I never ever thought that I'd be suggesting that we add a
[ ] people are talking about grilled cheese
line to that form. That caught me completely by surprise.


No one ever expects the Spanish Inquisition Grilled Cheese Incursion.
posted by zarq at 5:54 AM on September 11, 2010 [2 favorites]


Grilled Cheese Incursion.

I smell a Jam band!
posted by The Whelk at 6:27 AM on September 11, 2010 [1 favorite]


In protest of this idiotic callout, I am now going to make some ramen and not put anything in it but the MSG packet.

Aww, c'mon, don't torture yourself like that. C'mere, I'll sneak you some of my pickled serranos that I grew myself by the way, a splash of nam pla, and a handful of chopped herbs. (Blink twice if you want me to omit the cilantro.)
posted by desuetude at 6:58 AM on September 11, 2010 [2 favorites]


Don't want to talk about grilled cheese anymore? Fine.

So. zarq. How's Fashion Week going? Any good stories so far?
posted by rtha at 7:44 AM on September 11, 2010


This would be the perfect time for Vivienne Westwood to premiere her new line of sammich-inspired evening clutches.
posted by elizardbits at 7:51 AM on September 11, 2010 [3 favorites]


I like grilled cheese and I cannot lie
You other mefites can't deny
That a sandwich made with a cheesy butter taste
served up on a paper plate
can get DULL, wanna ask the green
'Cause you think you might have seen
some people make a suggestion
I hope I don't waste my question

OH sammich, I wanna spice you up
But not with ketchup
Nunukthedog tried to warn me
But that sammich makes me so hungry
I'm tired of foo-oo-dies
Sayin' peasant food ain't no thang
Take the average mefite and ask 'em that
Grilled cheese is delish

SO, mefites! (Yeah!) Mefites! (Yeah!)
Has your grilled cheese got panache? (Hell yeah!)
Tell 'em add bacon! (Bacon!) Mustard! (Mustard?)
And arugala if you're tough!
Grill up da cheese!
posted by pazazygeek at 7:56 AM on September 11, 2010 [14 favorites]


Actually, I wasn't reading MeTa for a few days. But now that I'm caught up, here's a new proposal for the form:


what is the problem? check all that apply:

[ ] I am a new member
[ ] I am a longtime member
[ ] One of my comments was deleted
[ ] One of my posts was deleted
[ ] There are too many posts here that don't reflect my interests
[ ] The posts here don't reflect the possibly-apocryphal higher quality that I remember Metafilter once having
[ ] Everyone here is an unthinking uncaring jerk except me
[ ] Someone is trying to use guilt, ethics, or logic to make me behave more politely on the Internet
[ ] Nobody here has a sense of humor
[ ] I've just discovered that not everyone has the same standards for taking offense as I do
[ ] People seem to be ignoring me
[ ] Everyone seems to be piling on to me
[ ] People are talking about grilled cheese
[ ] My canary will die if it gets the slightest whiff of the chatfilter, and its starting to look woozy in it's cage
[ ] Somebody just misused its/it's. I don't know or care if it was intentional
[ ] I miss all the recipes that used to be posted in MetaTalk


[[AND I AM OUTRAGED!]]


Tell me this wouldn't do a world of good, even if pressing the button just clears the form. People would use this button to death. I'm sure of it.
posted by .kobayashi. at 8:52 AM on September 11, 2010 [10 favorites]


Hey, how come i keep pressing the [[AND I AM OUTRAGED!]] button, AND NOTHING IS HAPPENING?!

Hello?! Is this thing even ON?!?!?!!!!11!?!?
posted by OneMonkeysUncle at 9:28 AM on September 11, 2010


[ ] I suspect the [[AND I AM OUTRAGED!]] button does nothing

Okay, now maybe that should cover it.
posted by .kobayashi. at 9:30 AM on September 11, 2010


[ ] My canary will die if it gets the slightest whiff of the chatfilter, and its starting to look woozy in it's cage

[ ] Other people misspell words to taunt me.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:32 AM on September 11, 2010 [1 favorite]


[ ] My canary will die if it gets the slightest whiff of the chatfilter, and its starting to look woozy in it's cage

[ ] Other people misspell words to taunt me.



user: .kobayashi.

what is the problem? check all that apply:

[ ] I am a new member
[x] I am a longtime member
[ ] One of my comments was deleted
[ ] One of my posts was deleted
[ ] There are too many posts here that don't reflect my interests
[ ] The posts here don't reflect the possibly-apocryphal higher quality that I remember Metafilter once having
[ ] Everyone here is an unthinking uncaring jerk except me
[ ] Someone is trying to use guilt, ethics, or logic to make me behave more politely on the Internet
[x] Nobody here has a sense of humor
[ ] I've just discovered that not everyone has the same standards for taking offense as I do
[ ] People seem to be ignoring me
[ ] Everyone seems to be piling on to me
[ ] People are talking about grilled cheese
[ ] My canary will die if it gets the slightest whiff of the chatfilter, and its starting to look woozy in it's cage
[ ] Somebody just misused its/it's. I don't know or care if it was intentional
[ ] Other people misspell words to taunt me
[x] Somebody has accurately pointed out something awful I said or did
[ ] I miss all the recipes that used to be posted in MetaTalk
[x] I suspect the [[AND I AM OUTRAGED!]] button does nothing


[[AND I AM OUTRAGED!]]


See? I feel better already.
posted by .kobayashi. at 9:52 AM on September 11, 2010 [3 favorites]


[ ] Schmoopy
[ ] GRAR
posted by iamabot at 9:53 AM on September 11, 2010


I didn't like grilled cheese growing up because my dad always used medium cheddar and it would cool off pretty fast and then it was just sort of weird and congealed. Plus I was a pretty distractable kid a lot of the time and so would not eat it promptly when it was still nice and melty. But in general, a cheddar grilled cheese doesn't do much for me even today, and as a kid I didn't really appreciate that there were other cheeses because we bought inexpensive big loafs of cheddar and that was that.

I fell in love with grilled cheese properly when, at some point in high school, I ordered a ham and grilled cheese at a random cafeteria at a buidling at OHSU I think, and it was American cheese on white bread that had been buttered and grilled just so, and the whole thing was this amazing salty gooey wonderland. I'm not a big fan of American cheese in general, but you grill that shit between slices of buttered bread and holy shit the plastic perfection that results.

In other childhood cheese stories, I got really cagey for a few years about eating plain old chunks of cheese after a traumatic incident when I was like six, in which I absentmindedly bit off and chewed up a bit of cheddar, absentmindedly took a drink of milk, and then absentmindedly sat there with both in my mouth for god knows how long and when I stopped daydreaming about rocketships or whatever the fuck I came back to reality with this awful gross milkcheese texture in my mouth that I had to go spit out. And lacking any real solid critical thinking skills at the time, I just assumed that I had somehow erred by taking too long to eat my cheese. So for a good long while after that every time I ate cheese I did so against a sense of urgency, making sure not to take too much time chewing and accidentally let that goddam cheese go rogue and gross me out.

I smell a Jam band!

That's one of the more reliable ways of locating them, yes.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:58 AM on September 11, 2010 [4 favorites]


I have neither bread nor cheese.

This is slowly turning into the gift of the magi.
posted by The Whelk


Those rubber arm pads on the crutches are pretty good if you boil them long enough.
posted by StickyCarpet at 10:09 AM on September 11, 2010 [1 favorite]


I like welsh rarebit. Cheese, mustard, and ale joined in sweetness and glory.
posted by clockzero at 10:41 AM on September 11, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'm more annoyed by the poster's use of the word "sammich." Can we ban that word please?
posted by apricot at 10:48 AM on September 11, 2010 [3 favorites]


Finally! I was beginning to think I was the only one on here who was frequently left slackjawed in amazement at the inability of certain members to either 1) Make an independent decision 2) Operate Google or 3) Dress themselves
posted by Biru at 10:49 AM on September 11, 2010


If you like welsh rarebit, you should really try beer cheddar soup.
posted by gingerbeer at 11:10 AM on September 11, 2010


Re: n00b catcher AskMe guidelines

Only "damn problematic" if there are serious problems besides "n00bs misjudge site culture," because that's just kind of what defines "n00b." If you don't ever misjudge site culture, you just get accepted as a regular. Then occasionally folks look at your user number and they're like, "80k? Huh."
posted by klangklangston at 11:57 AM on September 11, 2010


I'm back from Africa, with an almost MeFi meetup missed connection attempted with allkindsoftime but we managed to exchanged text messages and I stumble straight into this thread.

Oh lovely, I'm home... recipes *throws hugs around with glee*

Grilled cheese was the first thing we learnt at age 9 in weekly cooking classes a progressive home room teacher would hold for us (both girls and boys). Mmmm a few decades later...
posted by The Lady is a designer at 12:02 PM on September 11, 2010


Then occasionally folks look at your user number and they're like, "80k? Huh."
posted by klangklangston at 11:57 AM


ponders disinterring old numbers
posted by The Lady is a designer at 12:04 PM on September 11, 2010


Oh, and for the record, I agree with Nanuk about this. The question is chatfilter and had basically been answered before; a better question would have been how to get more experimental in cooking generally (it's weird how this question, at least in my opinion, would benefit from being broader rather than more specific, which is rare).

And talking about "peasant food" isn't some elitist foodie thing to do, and he's not being particularly judgmental about it. Maybe it's because I'm vegetarian and poor, but "peasant food" is a big part of my cooking repertoire — peasant to me just mostly denotes cheap and "ye olde," and Nanuk's right that everybody has it.

I'd also like to say that yeah, I had government cheese when I was growing up, and it's not bad. It's usually a really mild colby or something, at least where I grew up, not a processed cheese food. It's just really cheap for the government because they give it to you in some goddamn huge bricks that take up a huge amount of refrigerator space but are handy for feeding a big family. Government bread and government peanut butter tend to suck, but government cheese is just funnier to say.
posted by klangklangston at 12:08 PM on September 11, 2010


I'm more annoyed by the poster's use of the word "sammich." Can we ban that word please?

Yes, please! Also, is "sandwich" all that difficult to pronounce? Come on, people, we can do better.

Repeat after me:

SAND.

"SAND."

WITCH.

"WITCH."

SANDWICH.

"SAMWIDGE."

*dies inside*
posted by Sys Rq at 1:54 PM on September 11, 2010 [5 favorites]


[x] Nobody appreciated my random Catherine Tate video link

[[AND I AM OUTRAGED!]]
posted by 1000monkeys at 2:07 PM on September 11, 2010


Ironically, I've never used the word "sammich" before in my life. I'm not sure what made me do it in that context.
posted by torisaur at 2:25 PM on September 11, 2010


Yes, sammich needs to go. OUT!
posted by josher71 at 3:56 PM on September 11, 2010


I'm late to this. Oh, well.

Looking at the original question just now: 111 users marked this as a favorite

Is that a record? How would one go about finding out, if it's even possible? Because I'd love to be able read most-favorited threads, especially by graduated periods (e.g. day/week/month/all time).

Oh, is that a horse?
posted by Short Attention Sp at 4:05 PM on September 11, 2010


Well, first you could go to the "popular favorites" tab in the green, and click on the "all time" link. There you will see that 111 favorites is nowhere near a record.

Following that, if you want to see what the most-favorited questions in a given timeframe are, you can do this using the infodumpster that Combustible Edison Lighthouse made. You could run this manually for each week, month, year, etc., of interest.

If you wanted a sort of clickable list of most-favorited questions by month, that could be generated pretty easily from the Infodump data if you are handy with databases. I think that list is probably too long to post here, but I suppose I could put it on my web page of MeFi-related stuff if anyone would like that.
posted by FishBike at 4:14 PM on September 11, 2010


Ah, I knew that was somewhere!

It turns out that clicking "Popular" in the top left link cluster of the Blue takes you to a Popular Favorites page that is totally different from the good one over in the tabs. What's the deal there?
posted by Sys Rq at 4:33 PM on September 11, 2010 [1 favorite]


Okay, I'm keeping an emended version of that form up on my user page now. I'm not good enough with the html to make it with actual buttons for you people. But until I learn how to code the buttons and what not (don't hold your breath), you could always print it out, check the appropriate boxes, and then circle the button with ever-broader strokes, grinding your pencil down to its nub, until the outrage passes.
posted by .kobayashi. at 5:23 PM on September 11, 2010


t;dr but I thought this was going to be about blowjobs.
posted by exlotuseater at 5:32 PM on September 11, 2010


Since I had most of the code handy for this anyway, here are the 10 most favorited AskMe questions, by month.
posted by FishBike at 5:33 PM on September 11, 2010 [8 favorites]


The question is chatfilter and had basically been answered before; a better question would have been how to get more experimental in cooking generally (it's weird how this question, at least in my opinion, would benefit from being broader rather than more specific, which is rare).

That would be a completely different question. Which would not likely provide the answers sought by the OP. Which would be variations on a grilled cheese sandwich. So, someone's mindblowing madeleines using mongongo and lime zest wouldn't really be relevant.

A version of "how to be more experimental in cooking generally" question has been asked many times as well. How many variations on grilled cheese sandwiches were posited in each? Oooh, and how many times does a thoughtful answerer ask the OP to be more specific in their interests?
posted by desuetude at 8:17 PM on September 11, 2010


Hey, I totally live to eat. Back in my wildness days when I was young, angry and skinny I ate to live. That was a whole lot of no fun.
Anyhow, Grilled Cheese with :

Bacon [ ]
Dumb  [ ]
please select the first one
posted by peeedro at 9:37 PM on September 11, 2010


Thanks to you assholes, I'm now eating a tuna sandwich (kosher pickles on the side--"it's a Vlassic pickle!") and wishing I had some cheese to melt over the tuna :-S
posted by 1000monkeys at 10:09 PM on September 11, 2010


[blinking twice] that shit tastes like soap.
posted by at the crossroads at 1:53 AM on September 12, 2010


Wow, thanks, FishBike.

It's a treat simply reading the page, never mind the links just yet.

From 3/2010:
206 favorites: You make me want to be a better man.
174 favorites: It doesn't work that way

posted by Short Attention Sp at 2:27 AM on September 12, 2010


Of course you know this means war?

Well, I went and threw a bunch of shit in there anyway. I'm not really a man of principle when it comes down to it.

And talking about "peasant food" isn't some elitist foodie thing to do

I know, I understand the term. But he used it in the context of calling someone out for not being an elitist foodie. Let's be clear, he made a meta post to complain that this person isn't at an acceptable level of foodie-ism. The memail he sent me in response bares this out. It really bugs him that this person is not sophisticated enough about their grilled fucking cheese sandwiches. It's ridiculous.

Cortex: "American Cheese > Cheddar" (paraphrased)

I.. am stepping away now.
posted by cj_ at 3:36 AM on September 12, 2010


I finally bit the $5 bullet and joined the site just so I could say this:

My god, you fry grilled cheese sandwiches? WTF?

Why can't you use a toastie maker like the rest of the world?
posted by lollusc at 5:47 AM on September 12, 2010 [2 favorites]


Why can't you use a toastie maker like the rest of the world?

I don't have one of those. But I don't fry grilled cheese sandwiches either. Here's how I make them:
Apply margarine to one side of two slices of mass-produced white bread (aka "plant bread"). Put one slice margarine side down on a baking sheet. Unwrap two slices of Kraft "Singles" Process Cheese Product and put them on the first slice of bread, aligned with opposite corners of the bread. Put the second slice of bread on top, margarine side up. Note: yes, the margarine is on the outside of the sandwich.

Cook under the broiler in the oven, rack in about the middle or it goes too fast. Keep the door open and watch it cook until the bread looks toasty, then flip and cook the other side the same amount. Be warned that the interval from "toasty" to "burnt" is less than a minute. Cut in half diagonally and serve.
Foodies will no doubt be horrified by this, but I guess it's one of those childhood comfort food things. Two of the above sandwiches go very well with a can of Cream of Tomato soup, alternating bites of sandwich with spoonfuls of soup. The real trick is managing consumption rates to ensure simultaneous depletion of soup and sandwich.

I also like the kind of open-faced grilled cheese that's made with proper bread and excessive amounts of real cheddar cheese, broiled until it goes all bubbly and crunchy, but for those I find it helps to toast the bread lightly in the toaster first or it comes out all soggy.
posted by FishBike at 6:15 AM on September 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'd also like to say that yeah, I had government cheese when I was growing up, and it's not bad.

I wish we had had government cheese when I was growing up-- we were poor but proud, so mom used velveeta on wonderbread ; put me off cheese entirely for 15 years.

Why can't you use a toastie maker like the rest of the world?
Because a pan is more versatile? Because we don't have room for another appliance?

While youse guys were discussing grilled cheese sandwiches, I was making one for my spousal unit. When he is tired he always asks for a grilled cheese sandwich, but he is a purist and doesn't ever want anything but cheese on it (the roast beef, Virginia ham, pepper turkey, pickled jalapenos, cheese sandwich is his everyday lunch.) We only had Italian sweet rolls, so I cut one in half and turned it cut-side down, buttered, onto the pan. Layered on Provolone, Swiss, and White Cheddar, and put the flame on low so he could have plenty of time to take a shower (he is a dawdler.) After 15 minutes that sandwich was so perfect it looked like something on a magazine cover-- a golden brown, crispy crust with oozing melted cheese. I wish I had taken a picture.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 6:30 AM on September 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


"I'm more curious who these people less than HuronBob are?"

Actually, gman, that would just be you, everyone else has it all over me. But you, your being is the ray of hope that, when I fall in the barrel, there will be a mass that keeps me off the bottom!
posted by HuronBob at 6:45 AM on September 12, 2010 [2 favorites]


I.. am stepping away now.

Well, to be clear: I think American cheese makes a better basic grilled cheese sandwich experience than medium cheddar. I recognize that this may be a perversion on my part, perhaps medium cheddar grilleds are by and large preferred to American grilleds. Like I said, I don't really much like American cheese in any other context; by comparison you'd have a hard time opening my fridge and not finding a chunk of (probably sharp or extra sharp) cheddar in there.

I like all kinds of cheeses. Appreciating that weird varied splendor of hard dairy products is one of the little joys of of adulthood, as far as I'm concerned. But don't make me a medium cheddar grilled cheese sandwich, please. And def. don't serve it with tomato soup.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:18 AM on September 12, 2010


Grilled cheese is served with leek and potato soup!
posted by The Whelk at 8:30 AM on September 12, 2010


I had grilled cheese and tomato soup for the first time at a friend's house when I was 16. I have hated tomato soup since. It is gross.
posted by josher71 at 8:34 AM on September 12, 2010


(actually, in the summer you serve Grilled cheese with mint and cucumber soup, in the winter it is some kind of onion soup.)
posted by The Whelk at 8:36 AM on September 12, 2010


Now, mint and cucumber soup sounds just delightful.
posted by josher71 at 8:44 AM on September 12, 2010


here you go.

It is the living answer to "Huh, it's summer and now I have an endless supply of cucumbers ...and mint ..."
posted by The Whelk at 8:50 AM on September 12, 2010


Thanks Whelk! Can I call you Whelk? Or is it always The Whelk?
posted by josher71 at 9:28 AM on September 12, 2010


The The is an honorary title bestowed by the regional junior head of the Little Lebowski Urban Achievers
posted by The Whelk at 9:32 AM on September 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


And proud we are of all of him.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:46 AM on September 12, 2010 [2 favorites]


cortex, if you chop up a slice of American cheese and make the rest nicer-quality cheese, grated, you get the best of both worlds.

Before I was ready to fuss with a roux to start my mac & cheese, I'd cheat by using cheddar with a handful of diced Velveeta to act as an emulsifier.
posted by desuetude at 10:09 AM on September 12, 2010


I tried to make one of these fancy sandwiches and it ended up with me shouting about replacing all our cooking utensils with collectible ceramic kittens and ordering all my food through the mail by scientists who use spreadsheets to figure out when I should poo cause clearly I can't be expected to feed myself like any adult mammal and in fact this grilled cheese sandwich represents the futility of human action in a pointless, amoral universe.


I think I'm ready to write that Achewood pastiche now
posted by The Whelk at 10:53 AM on September 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


Lollusc: My god, you fry grilled cheese sandwiches? WTF?

Why can't you use a toastie maker like the rest of the world?


You mean you don't fry them? Heck, I'm a Canadian and I LOL at American food all the time, but just toasting bread and buttering it and adding cheese? That is not a grilled cheese, that's just toast with cheese in the middle. The whole point of a grilled cheese is tasting that fried-in buttery goodness (margarine? really, people?) and all that gooey, properly melted cheese in the middle (I personally use a nice aged cheddar. I hate processed cheese, however Kraft singles are exempted from my ire because they have become very traditional, though I still detest them).
posted by 1000monkeys at 11:23 AM on September 12, 2010 [2 favorites]


Unless "toastie maker" means some weird sort of grilling contraption in Australian and not toaster like "the rest of the world" calls it.
posted by 1000monkeys at 11:24 AM on September 12, 2010


The Wikipedia entry for Sandwich toaster says it's also known as a toastie maker.
posted by FishBike at 11:28 AM on September 12, 2010


toastie maker is a wonderful example of a word that hovers ever so gently on the edge of sounding dirty without any actual salacious content. It's all the the subtle formations of the syllables.
posted by The Whelk at 11:33 AM on September 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


The Wikipedia entry for Sandwich toaster says it's also known as a toastie maker.

Oh, well then, carry on. (Though I am amused with myself that I guessed Australian correctly). Silly Australians and their pet words for things.
posted by 1000monkeys at 11:50 AM on September 12, 2010


Way to explain the the meme.
posted by SpiffyRob at 12:55 PM on September 12, 2010


Deconstructed Grilled Cheese Sandwich

1. Make a grilled cheese sandwich.

2. Look in the refrigerator and consider all the ingredients that you didn't use, and how your choice of ingredients places you in a cultural and temporal context and distinguishes you as a unique and ultimately flawed human being.

3. Think about all of the sandwiches that you didn't make for your family, friends, enemies, and the vast number of people that you don't know, some of whom may be hungry or starving. Feel a vague sense of guilt, if you believe that to be an appropriate reaction.

4. Consider the cheese; where it came from, how it was extracted from the cow, how that cow was fed. Consider the bread.

5. Rebuild the stream of events in human history that allowed you, or forced you, to create the sandwich, taking into account even these limited factors. Do you feel hate, annoyance, self-loathing? Yet, this is who you are; this is why you made your sandwich. Now you have no choice but to live with your decision.

6. Eat the sandwich.
posted by shii at 9:58 PM on September 12, 2010 [7 favorites]


I DECLARE TODAY! SEPTEMBER 10th TO BE GRILLED CHEESE DAY IN THE FEDERATED KINGDOM OF METAFILTER.

Yay! Me & bilabial get to celebrate GRILLED CHEESE DAY (on MetaFilter) on our birthdays from now on! :)

Which is weird, because I really wanted a grilled cheese on my birthday but never got around to it. Had one yesterday with a slice of ham.

Also: grated cheese and really soft butter, cooked slow on relatively low heat. Makes the cheese extra melty and the outside lightly crispy. Courtesy America's Test Kitchen, an episode I saw years ago.
posted by epersonae at 5:30 PM on September 13, 2010


I had to make a grilled cheese sandwich as I was reading this, but I don't have any butter! How can I not have any butter?

So I tried making it in the George Foreman grill (as usual--this is the perfect way to make grilled cheese as long as you doit right) but without the butter, and it just didn't come out right :(

Now I'm sad, I didn't get a good grilled cheese sandwich, and I ate a bunch of cheese so I can't eat anything else to make it better.
posted by galadriel at 6:55 PM on September 13, 2010


I love grilled cheese sandwiches - on thickly sliced light rye, with a combination of cheddar and havarti, and a dash of garlic powder and oregano in them. I share them with my birds, Dr. Buzzard and Dr. Benway. Buzz particularly likes the soft, warm, slightly greasy inner layer of bread between where the cheese has melted into the bread and the crunchy outer layer. He'll sit on my shoulder, and take tiny little bites out of the bread, while making teeny little delighted squeaking noises. It's insanely cute.
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 10:03 PM on September 13, 2010


Well, to be clear: I think American cheese makes a better basic grilled cheese sandwich experience than medium cheddar. I recognize that this may be a perversion on my part

If you came over to my house, and I was like HEY CORTEX, BEST BUDDY OLE PAL, WOULD YOU LIKE A GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH.. YES? HOW SHOULD I MAKE IT? and I laid out my vast selection of cheese, which included everything from velveeta to goat cheese, you would pick American preformed slices over medium cheddar?

Man, I think I was railing against some random person a few threads ago about being a food snob, but that seriously puts me on edge if your answer is the american cheese slices.

(I really should have stepped away, but cheese is serious business.)
posted by cj_ at 2:02 AM on September 16, 2010


Well, if you laid out a vast selection of cheese and yet made me choose between only American and medium cheddar, yes. You'd also be kind of mean.

If you let me choose from the whole vast selection, I'd probably pick some third option, though it might not be the goat cheese unless you had something nice to go with it because I think most days that much melted chevre would be a little overwhelmingly creamy by itself.

A better question is what we are both doing arguing about cheese at two in the morning.
posted by cortex (staff) at 2:20 AM on September 16, 2010


it's really the only time to argue about cheese.
posted by The Whelk at 6:32 AM on September 16, 2010


You mean someone moved it?
posted by The Lady is a designer at 7:28 AM on September 16, 2010


Well, the aristaiocentric model of the solar system says that the cheese remains stationary, while everything else moves in relation to it.
posted by FishBike at 7:45 AM on September 16, 2010


it is common knowledge that the cheese stands alone.
posted by The Whelk at 7:49 AM on September 16, 2010


Great. Now I'm going to have that song stuck in my head all day.
posted by stoneweaver at 9:05 AM on September 16, 2010


Maybe we should just ban the sandwichfilter askmes, just saw another one... or collate them all under sandwich, filler, filter, meta

hmm, maybe its time for an addition to the site, in sunshine yellow "RecipeFilter"
posted by The Lady is a designer at 10:33 AM on September 20, 2010


Ah, but in that one, 517 specifically pointed out no cheese ("I am tired of eating cheese"), so I'm not sure that this particular call out applies...
posted by .kobayashi. at 10:41 AM on September 20, 2010


*returns beans hurriedly*
posted by The Lady is a designer at 11:53 AM on September 20, 2010


American processed cheese food is great for grilled cheese. Supplement it with a more real cheese if you wish, but that even meltiness of the velveeta can't be found in any real cheese on its own.

That said, I'm all for Chihuahua cheese--it melts very well and is tasty. Maybe mix in some pepper jack boo ya.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 7:13 PM on September 20, 2010


*faintly*

You can milk a Chihuahua?
posted by The corpse in the library at 12:30 PM on September 21, 2010 [2 favorites]


You can milk a Chihuahua?

It takes a steady hand, a shitload of animal tranquilizers, and some high quality tweezers.
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 12:40 PM on September 21, 2010


But won't a shitload of tranquilizers, like, kill the little beggar?
posted by The Lady is a designer at 2:10 PM on September 21, 2010


It's a region of Mexico, kind sirs and madams, and it produces fine cheese.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 8:21 PM on September 21, 2010


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