Is this too much to ask? October 24, 2010 10:50 PM   Subscribe

Pony request.
posted by bardophile to Feature Requests at 10:50 PM (103 comments total) 5 users marked this as a favorite

You want ....the metafilter flag system?
posted by The Whelk at 11:00 PM on October 24, 2010 [2 favorites]


GYOB and do it there. No, really.

This self-correcting market-style system seems incompatible with the current central government (a.k.a mod team) socialism of the Republic of Meta (Filter)
posted by Throw away your common sense and get an afro! at 11:01 PM on October 24, 2010 [1 favorite]


I think the OP is a bot.
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 11:03 PM on October 24, 2010


Everyone here is a bot (except me).
posted by felix betachat at 11:16 PM on October 24, 2010


Everyone here is a bot (except me).

That does not commmmmmeeeerrrr I mean that's a ridiculous and libelous assertion!
posted by Pope Guilty at 11:18 PM on October 24, 2010 [2 favorites]


I feel confused and afraid in MeTa threads that aren't about love and hugs.
posted by katillathehun at 11:24 PM on October 24, 2010 [1 favorite]


INSERT INTO metafilters
(metatalk, 19919)
COMMENTS
(constructive, useful);
posted by vidur at 11:25 PM on October 24, 2010 [1 favorite]


Yes, strong AI is too much to ask for.
posted by mumkin at 11:40 PM on October 24, 2010 [1 favorite]


Katillathehun, do the hugs count if they're from a bot?
posted by MeghanC at 12:00 AM on October 25, 2010


I can do the robot. I can do that much for you. *does the robot*
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 12:13 AM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]


"Is this too much to ask?"

You're talking about the white background, aren't you?
posted by iamkimiam at 12:16 AM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]


So, what you're asking for is essentially a language where 1) every utterance can be positively classified as constructive or non-constructive without the context, and 2) furthermore, where "constructive" is something you can give a strict definition for?

Yep, that's definitely not too much to ask.
posted by daniel_charms at 12:20 AM on October 25, 2010


Katillathehun, do the hugs count if they're from a bot?

Well... maybe, but only if they're properly spelled. None of this FREE HUG5! CI@LIS! V1AGRA! business.
posted by katillathehun at 12:32 AM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]


you want us all the get haircuts and become stick figures who rarely sit?
posted by nadawi at 12:36 AM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]


I never got beyond BASIC, so yes this is too much to ask.

Also, mods
posted by From Bklyn at 12:43 AM on October 25, 2010


We are all Matthowie's sock puppets.
posted by 1000monkeys at 12:46 AM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]


Score:5, Insightful
posted by flabdablet at 12:54 AM on October 25, 2010 [4 favorites]


daniel_charms: "So, what you're asking for is essentially a language where 1) every utterance can be positively classified as constructive or non-constructive without the context, and 2) furthermore, where "constructive" is something you can give a strict definition for?"

It's amazing the way you [NOTICE TWO THINGS].
posted by Rhaomi at 12:55 AM on October 25, 2010 [14 favorites]


It's amazing the way you [NOTICE TWO THINGS].

[ ] Constructive
[ ] Not Constructive
[x] Overthinking a Plate of Beans

posted by daniel_charms at 1:00 AM on October 25, 2010 [3 favorites]


It's amazing the way I [love Rhaomi and daniel_charms].
posted by iamkimiam at 1:01 AM on October 25, 2010


If those electro-shock pagers are real, then we've just killed the mods.
posted by The Whelk at 1:02 AM on October 25, 2010


This thread is a bunch of [ERROR: SNARK REFERENCE 462 NOT FOUND]
posted by EndsOfInvention at 1:39 AM on October 25, 2010 [3 favorites]


If this pony is asking us to be internet nerds who remain indie-ly smug in our technological superiority over the proletariat while foregoing humour for catchphrases and in-jokes, I think a good chunk of us are way ahead of you.
posted by stelas at 2:03 AM on October 25, 2010 [7 favorites]


str=right(askpost.title,instrev(" "))
q= "help+me+think+through+this+situation+with+my+" & str
httpreq.open get,"http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=" & q
print httpreq.responsetext
I know this is easier said than done but you do have to trust God when you ask and thank him for what you ask for as if you already have it, trust me I know I have been waiting for someone special for a while now but I know deep down he has not forgotten me and maybe there is still some things about me I need to change before he will send him.

posted by doublehappy at 2:08 AM on October 25, 2010


Note to self: When you get the urge make a jokey post to MetaTalk, don't.
posted by bardophile at 2:16 AM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]


So I can flag this entire post as non-constructive, then?
posted by Throw away your common sense and get an afro! at 2:22 AM on October 25, 2010


Aedificant qui iudicat loquellam? Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
posted by Happy Dave at 2:25 AM on October 25, 2010


The fact that I'm still reading this indicates that I'm not the robot. *does the postdoc who still sits here at home*
posted by Namlit at 2:50 AM on October 25, 2010


This Pony don't trot.
posted by From Bklyn at 3:19 AM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]


Note to self: When you get the urge make a jokey post to MetaTalk, don't.

On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dogjoking.
posted by daniel_charms at 3:47 AM on October 25, 2010


Sometimes a pony gets depressed.
posted by daniel_charms at 3:51 AM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]


Great post! Did you mean beardophile?
posted by doublehappy at 4:26 AM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]


Everyone here is a bot (except me).

Can we get A Robot Made of Meat up in here?

His username actually came in very handy the other day. My boss asked me how the machinery was holding up, and I told him "The robots made of metal are doing great. Tho robots made of meat are getting a little tired."
posted by Devils Rancher at 4:52 AM on October 25, 2010 [14 favorites]


I found a helpful and constructive way to meet fun and interesting people at teensforoldcodgersDOTcom. I met my new boyfriend there and he bought me a pony!
posted by Curious Artificer at 5:09 AM on October 25, 2010


You're are going to be in sooooo much trouble once mom and dad get up.
posted by nomadicink at 5:14 AM on October 25, 2010


This is a very insightful post.

I am always watching out for interesting comments on what ordinary Americans can do to get cheaper drugs. I've written a post about it on my blog.
posted by MuffinMan at 5:22 AM on October 25, 2010 [5 favorites]


In the store this weekend I noticed there's actually an amazing variety of beans available. Also, a plate doesn't really seem like the optimal bean platform, a bowl would lend itself to more efficient spoon usage. Do people eat beans with spoons?
posted by empyrean at 5:35 AM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]


I've always thought that it really was too much to ask. But I'm so glad I read your blog about Pony request. I have a lot of similar ideas. Maybe we could trade links and share traffic?
posted by Ghidorah at 6:05 AM on October 25, 2010 [5 favorites]


TAT3RS
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 6:22 AM on October 25, 2010


I had a dream that life was exactly like xkcd. At first it was great, because everyone was smart! Then a bunch of people started talking about string theory, and I politely excused myself, only to walk straight into the frame at the edge of the comic and bonk my forehead, because I didn't have eyes and couldn't see where I was going. Everyone laughed at me and said "well, what do you expect from a liberal arts major?"
posted by Metroid Baby at 6:25 AM on October 25, 2010 [18 favorites]


Do you want a strongly superhuman or weakly godlike AI? Also what color should it be?
posted by Mister_A at 6:44 AM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]


"well, what do you expect from a liberal arts major?"

Iced Single Venti Mocha, No Whip.
posted by nomadicink at 6:53 AM on October 25, 2010 [41 favorites]


O snap!
posted by Mister_A at 6:53 AM on October 25, 2010


Everyone here is a bot (except me)

It's a fair cop.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 7:35 AM on October 25, 2010


Flagged as Goodhart's noise.
posted by hawthorne at 7:42 AM on October 25, 2010


Am I a man who others think is a bot?

Or a bot who thinks the others are men?
posted by The Whelk at 7:46 AM on October 25, 2010


"well, what do you expect from a liberal arts major?"

Color.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 7:48 AM on October 25, 2010


Suppose that there is a natural, universal, invariable language, common to every individual of human race, and that metafilter posts are natural productions which perpetuate themselves in the same manner with animals and vegetables, by descent and propagation ... Suppose, therefore, that you enter into your metafilter thus populated by natural posts containing the most refined reason and most exquisite beauty. Could you possibly read the more inside and doubt that its original cause bore the strongest analogy to mind and intelligence?

I just finished notes on that passage, so it was fresh in my mind
posted by chndrcks at 7:53 AM on October 25, 2010


Tell me more about Pony request.
posted by shakespeherian at 7:54 AM on October 25, 2010 [6 favorites]


Lately, I've been trolling spammers that send some variation of I HAS CRAZY MONEY IN AN OVERSEAS ACCOUNT PLEASE HELP spam to one of my old junk hotmail accounts. I ask them if they'll sell me a kidney and even after a couple of jokey replies they're still begging me to send them $100 or so.
posted by Burhanistan at 8:00 AM on October 25, 2010


This pony is lame.
posted by cjorgensen at 8:09 AM on October 25, 2010


I wish I could write like you about Pony request as Margaret Laurence once said "When I say "work" I only mean writing. Everything else is just odd jobs."
posted by Kwine at 8:30 AM on October 25, 2010


Does an XKCD comic that's about internet comments in general but isn't otherwise relevant to Metafilter constitute a good post for MetaTalk? I'm going to go with "no."
posted by John Cohen at 8:36 AM on October 25, 2010


I've written about this before, but a much easier system to implement than the one in the comic is "reading comprehension CAPTCHAs". When you write a blog post or news article, you also come up with three or four multiple choice questions about the article. When someone wants to post a comment, they have to answer one of these questions selected at random. If they get it wrong, they can't comment.

Sure, all a troll would have to do is skim the article for the answer, but like in the comic that Mission Fucking Accomplished, right? At least the creeps are spending more time with the meat of the article than they would be otherwise.
posted by Ian A.T. at 8:39 AM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]


My pony request is that any link to xkcd.com/* gets filtered to lemonparty.org.
posted by codacorolla at 8:39 AM on October 25, 2010


(Also: "answer a question about grammar" CAPTHCHAs.)
posted by Ian A.T. at 8:40 AM on October 25, 2010


"well, what do you expect from a liberal arts major?"

Iced Single Venti Mocha, No Whip.


THIS is the best of the internet. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go clean beverage off of my keyboard, desk, monitor, wall, and a co-worker who was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Thank you for making my day. :-)
posted by ElDiabloConQueso at 8:45 AM on October 25, 2010


My pony request is that any link to xkcd.com/* gets filtered to lemonparty.org.

That or the equivalent comic at Goatkcd [definitely NSFW]
posted by theodolite at 9:04 AM on October 25, 2010


That or the equivalent comic at Goatkcd [definitely NSFW]

I have to say, that's a marked improvement.

Also Lemonparty added music... fun!
posted by codacorolla at 9:38 AM on October 25, 2010


Does an XKCD comic that's about internet comments in general but isn't otherwise relevant to Metafilter constitute a good post for MetaTalk? I'm going to go with "no."

Careful though, by asking this question, you've just turned this thread into a discussion of site policy with respect to what's a good post for MetaTalk. Which makes this one, doesn't it?
posted by FishBike at 9:39 AM on October 25, 2010


"Well... maybe, but only if they're properly spelled"

With an H?
posted by klangklangston at 9:42 AM on October 25, 2010


Hmm, what happens when you crowd source judgment on what constitutes constructive engagement?

Oh. God. No.
posted by nanojath at 9:43 AM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]


It's getting to be that time of year! Here's my simple but good recipe for stew.

Delicious Erectile Stew!

-1 cup fresh, coarsely chopped VIAGR4
-2 lbs. CIAL1S, bones removed
-2 cups chicken or beef stock
-1/2 cup finely chopped celery
-1/2 cup finely chopped carrots
-1 teaspoon salt
-1 tablespoon olive oil

Pepper to taste

Heat olive oil over medium heat in a large pot. Saute chopped VIAGR4 in olive oil until lightly browned. Add CIAL1S and saute until edges become brown all over. Remove from pan. Add celery, carrots, stock and salt. Once the carrots and celery have become soft add VIAGR4 and CIAL1S back to pot; bring to a boil, then reduce to a simmer and let cook for another half an hour.

Serve immediately. Garnish with minced unlubricated condoms.
posted by dubitable at 9:59 AM on October 25, 2010


I often enjoy the xkcd title/mouseover text.
posted by theora55 at 10:15 AM on October 25, 2010


Maybe this November we can try an experiment where we don't make MeTa posts about every damned thing that pops into our heads.
posted by Wolfdog at 10:15 AM on October 25, 2010


You take the bones out of your CIAL1S?! That's the whole point!
posted by echo target at 10:15 AM on October 25, 2010


If we took the bones out, it wouldn't be crunchy, would it?
posted by shakespeherian at 10:40 AM on October 25, 2010


The bones are a delicacy and are reserved for dishes that better showcase their form and...oh god, I'm not feeling well today but I know that I can't take this joke anywhere funny on my own.
posted by bilabial at 10:40 AM on October 25, 2010


The 'h' in hug stands for 'Helloooooo, girl of my dreams!'.
posted by carsonb at 10:51 AM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]


Maybe this November we can try an experiment where we don't make MeTa posts about every damned thing that pops into our heads.

But I've got huge plans for NaMeTaMo! I've already written an outline and everything!
posted by Metroid Baby at 10:54 AM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]


I have only two chrome arms† to hold you.

†other options available! Come visit robotarms.com to see our fabulous selection!
posted by bonehead at 11:03 AM on October 25, 2010


The amusing thing is that webwise adoption of that system would eliminate most of xkcd's traffic.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:10 AM on October 25, 2010


This pony is relevant to my interests. I would like to subscribe to its newsletter.
posted by ApathyGirl at 11:32 AM on October 25, 2010


How does a Pony write a newsletter?
posted by The Whelk at 11:58 AM on October 25, 2010


Loudly, I think. Sounds a bit like this: *plays the coconuts*
posted by maryr at 12:00 PM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]


Such a negative publication, the Pony Express. Full of neigh-sayers.
posted by The Whelk at 12:08 PM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]


runs, hides
posted by The Whelk at 12:08 PM on October 25, 2010


I also was going to trot out a neigh pun but decided to put it to pasture instead.
posted by Burhanistan at 12:09 PM on October 25, 2010


couldn't hoof it, huh?
posted by The Whelk at 12:11 PM on October 25, 2010


Hay, come back!
posted by shakespeherian at 12:11 PM on October 25, 2010


best shoes for sale http://www.spearshoes.com/
posted by not_on_display at 12:39 PM on October 25, 2010


How does a Pony write a newsletter?

Loudly, I think. Sounds a bit like this: *plays the coconuts*

Ha! But does the pony really write it, or is it just being a Clever Hans and reacting to the body language of its stenographer (who does all the actual writing and just uses the pony as a publicty stunt)?
posted by daniel_charms at 12:51 PM on October 25, 2010


shh, that's how the Times op-Ed page gets written.
posted by The Whelk at 12:52 PM on October 25, 2010


I'm not sure, daniel. I think you'd have to go to the source on that one.
posted by maryr at 12:58 PM on October 25, 2010


Don't look gift source in the references.
posted by The Whelk at 12:59 PM on October 25, 2010


Whenever I look a gift source in the references, I ask - why the long face?
posted by empyrean at 1:16 PM on October 25, 2010


The source is Satan
posted by not_on_display at 1:22 PM on October 25, 2010


You geeks and your gifts.
posted by The Whelk at 1:23 PM on October 25, 2010


You mean *.gifs.
posted by maryr at 2:24 PM on October 25, 2010


Yeah, the old saw is, "Beware of geeks sharing .gifs"
posted by Mister_A at 2:26 PM on October 25, 2010


Please send me the naked jpgs of Marina Sirtis.

not really, though.
posted by catlet at 2:38 PM on October 25, 2010


It's not officially a MeTa thread until The Whelk starts trotting out puns.
posted by Ghidorah at 2:49 PM on October 25, 2010


It's not officially a metal thread until you can screw nuts on it.
posted by flabdablet at 3:26 PM on October 25, 2010


It's not officially a pony request until the "Long Distance Dedication" from Secretariat asking Casey Kasem to play "Keep On Lovin' You."
posted by not_on_display at 3:37 PM on October 25, 2010


I'm going to go to Stud if you need me.
posted by The Whelk at 4:31 PM on October 25, 2010


I think we can safely say that this thread has gone to seed, and should be tilled under.
posted by dubitable at 5:42 PM on October 25, 2010


salt it, so nothing may grow.
posted by The Whelk at 5:56 PM on October 25, 2010


What's with useless meta posts, this one and the tea post above it are basically jokes.

Can't you guys go to the local bar and do this????
posted by HuronBob at 6:23 PM on October 25, 2010


Sorry, they banned me for life from the local bar. My sockpuppet gets to stay, though, lucky bastard.
posted by not_on_display at 6:37 PM on October 25, 2010


Pony sticks her little tongue out at you.
posted by galadriel at 7:14 PM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]


...I thought this was my local bar?


*runs away sobbing*
posted by The Whelk at 7:25 PM on October 25, 2010


I'll have the same thing as The Whelk. Oblivion, here I come!
posted by From Bklyn at 5:25 AM on October 26, 2010


Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey buddy, why the long face?"
posted by slogger at 10:57 AM on October 26, 2010


« Older "This question gets asked a lot. Especially in...   |   Metafilter: A Collection of Taglines Newer »

You are not logged in, either login or create an account to post comments