RIP Balisong February 4, 2011 7:16 AM Subscribe
The obituary says Andrew Charles Bullock, but we knew him as Balisong. Rest in peace, Balisong.
This morning we received the sudden news from his wife:
This morning we received the sudden news from his wife:
Hello, I am the wife of Andrew Bullock, better known to your community as Balisong. Andy had a sudden heart attack and died last Friday night, Jan 28th. He was 41 years old, and is survived by myself and his two children, ages 4 and 2. He was an active member of MetaFilter; he spent much of his daily free time reading and posting to your site.Please post remembrances here.
A link to the obituary in the local paper: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/gazette/obituary.aspx?n=andrew-charles-bullock&pid=148295318
I don't know how many of you remember him, but you were all a large part of Andy's world. I would like to thank the Metafilter community for offering Andy so much information, conversation, and enjoyment through the years.
Julia
I didn't always agree with his opinions, but whenever I saw his username, I knew the comment above it would be worth reading, if only for a well-written perspective different from my own.
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posted by Jorus at 7:28 AM on February 4, 2011 [7 favorites]
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posted by Jorus at 7:28 AM on February 4, 2011 [7 favorites]
Oh, no. His personality really showed in his contributions, and he seemed like a genuinely nice guy. We will miss him, but not nearly as much as his loved ones and family. Bless you, Julia, and please let your children know their daddy was loved by many, even by those who never had the chance to meet him in person.
posted by Curious Artificer at 7:30 AM on February 4, 2011 [4 favorites]
posted by Curious Artificer at 7:30 AM on February 4, 2011 [4 favorites]
That's a real shame. Julia, my deepest sympathies to you and your family.
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posted by Admiral Haddock at 7:32 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Admiral Haddock at 7:32 AM on February 4, 2011
Aw, man. Like Jorus said, I didn't always agree with him, but appreciated his voice and point of view.
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posted by Shepherd at 7:34 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Shepherd at 7:34 AM on February 4, 2011
Balisong always stood out to me as a person who could hold an unpopular/minority opinion but be a gentleman about representing it in the discussion. 41 is too damn young. My heart goes out to his family.
posted by nanojath at 7:35 AM on February 4, 2011 [2 favorites]
posted by nanojath at 7:35 AM on February 4, 2011 [2 favorites]
This is sad to hear. I had been looking at some of his contributions recently, and he came across as a genuinely funny, insightful guy. At least one of his comments comes across as far more poignant in light of this sad news
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:35 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:35 AM on February 4, 2011
Someday you'll see me floating in the sunshine
My head sticking out from a low-lying cloud
You hear me call you, singing through the sunshine
Sweet and clear as can be,
Come to me...Here am I...Come to me...
If you try, you'll find me,
Where the sky meets the sea,
Here am I your special island
Come to me...Come to me...
Bali Ha'i...Bali Ha'i...Bali Ha'i
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posted by lobstah at 7:37 AM on February 4, 2011 [7 favorites]
My head sticking out from a low-lying cloud
You hear me call you, singing through the sunshine
Sweet and clear as can be,
Come to me...Here am I...Come to me...
If you try, you'll find me,
Where the sky meets the sea,
Here am I your special island
Come to me...Come to me...
Bali Ha'i...Bali Ha'i...Bali Ha'i
.
posted by lobstah at 7:37 AM on February 4, 2011 [7 favorites]
whenever I saw his username, I knew the comment above it would be worth reading
Ditto.
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posted by LionIndex at 7:38 AM on February 4, 2011 [2 favorites]
Ditto.
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posted by LionIndex at 7:38 AM on February 4, 2011 [2 favorites]
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posted by Reverend John at 7:38 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Reverend John at 7:38 AM on February 4, 2011
Oh this is just horrible. I always respected him for sticking to his guns in a grownup manner, even when his views were in the minority. My deepest condolences to his family.
posted by shiu mai baby at 7:38 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by shiu mai baby at 7:38 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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posted by mothershock at 7:40 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by mothershock at 7:40 AM on February 4, 2011
I strongly disagreed with some of his opinions, but on the whole, I'd rather have him here disagreeing with me than not here at all. I feel we will suffer for not having his thoughts expressed here. My thoughts are with you, Balisong, and your wife and children. Rest in peace.
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posted by grouse at 7:40 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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posted by grouse at 7:40 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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posted by middleclasstool at 7:46 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by middleclasstool at 7:46 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis at 7:46 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis at 7:46 AM on February 4, 2011
I didn't know him personally but I found that we crossed paths in a lot of threads by virtue of a number of common interests.
I really liked his writing and contributions, and I'm feeling more than a little bit like I've been punched in the gut.
My sincerest condolences to his friends and family, 41 is too young.
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posted by quin at 7:48 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
I really liked his writing and contributions, and I'm feeling more than a little bit like I've been punched in the gut.
My sincerest condolences to his friends and family, 41 is too young.
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posted by quin at 7:48 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
Balisong always stood out to me as a person who could hold an unpopular/minority opinion but be a gentleman about representing it in the discussion. 41 is too damn young. My heart goes out to his family.
Completely agree. He was a true gentleman and I always respected the thoughtful way he responded to people here.
May his memory be for a blessing, and may he rest in peace. My condolences to his family.
posted by zarq at 7:54 AM on February 4, 2011
Completely agree. He was a true gentleman and I always respected the thoughtful way he responded to people here.
May his memory be for a blessing, and may he rest in peace. My condolences to his family.
posted by zarq at 7:54 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by cybercoitus interruptus at 7:55 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by cybercoitus interruptus at 7:55 AM on February 4, 2011
One of the first great posts that I remember reading here, one of the ones that made me realize this was a community I needed to be a part of, was the one he posted about the knives he took his username from.
We didn't agree on much, but I always looked forward to his contributions here.
posted by rollbiz at 8:00 AM on February 4, 2011
We didn't agree on much, but I always looked forward to his contributions here.
posted by rollbiz at 8:00 AM on February 4, 2011
41 is just way too young. So sorry.
posted by Devils Rancher at 8:02 AM on February 4, 2011 [6 favorites]
posted by Devils Rancher at 8:02 AM on February 4, 2011 [6 favorites]
Mrs. Bullock,
God bless and good luck. Make sure the kids know their father was an upstanding and outstanding man. I made a donation to the fund listed in the obituary.
AW
posted by AugustWest at 8:06 AM on February 4, 2011
God bless and good luck. Make sure the kids know their father was an upstanding and outstanding man. I made a donation to the fund listed in the obituary.
AW
posted by AugustWest at 8:06 AM on February 4, 2011
Oh man, this is sad. I'm really sorry to read this. I'll miss reading his comments.
posted by Forktine at 8:13 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Forktine at 8:13 AM on February 4, 2011
Is there an easy way to see the things he's said that I've favorited? I can remember him as being entertaining, so I know I must have marked a few of his.
posted by cjorgensen at 8:16 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by cjorgensen at 8:16 AM on February 4, 2011
Balisong was old school. Very sad to hear of his passing. Even more so because I'm 41 and have two small children too.
posted by fenriq at 8:17 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by fenriq at 8:17 AM on February 4, 2011
God damn it. One really shitty thing about getting older is the death announcements start coming in more and more frequently. I'll miss Balisong.
posted by HopperFan at 8:19 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by HopperFan at 8:19 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 8:21 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 8:21 AM on February 4, 2011
cjorgensen: "Is there an easy way to see the things he's said that I've favorited? I can remember him as being entertaining, so I know I must have marked a few of his."
Via the infodumpster:
None.
Comments he favorited of yours.
posted by zarq at 8:22 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
Via the infodumpster:
None.
Comments he favorited of yours.
posted by zarq at 8:22 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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posted by bitterpants at 8:22 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by bitterpants at 8:22 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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Julia: thanks for letting us know about this while a million things must be on your mind. Even though we may have not known your husband in person or very well, we all value members of this community in a special way.
cjorgensen: "Is there an easy way to see the things he's said that I've favorited? I can remember him as being entertaining, so I know I must have marked a few of his."
Infodumpster can do this.
posted by l33tpolicywonk at 8:23 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
Julia: thanks for letting us know about this while a million things must be on your mind. Even though we may have not known your husband in person or very well, we all value members of this community in a special way.
cjorgensen: "Is there an easy way to see the things he's said that I've favorited? I can remember him as being entertaining, so I know I must have marked a few of his."
Infodumpster can do this.
posted by l33tpolicywonk at 8:23 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
Nthing that 41 is way too young.
See you on the other side, brother.
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posted by lord_wolf at 8:23 AM on February 4, 2011
See you on the other side, brother.
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posted by lord_wolf at 8:23 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by three blind mice at 8:23 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by three blind mice at 8:23 AM on February 4, 2011
I'm so sorry to hear this. My thoughts are with his family.
posted by Metroid Baby at 8:32 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Metroid Baby at 8:32 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by hermitosis at 8:36 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by hermitosis at 8:36 AM on February 4, 2011
Oh my god. He drove me crazy over a few issues, but entirely unlike some other people who drive me crazy, he was never mean-spirited in our disagreements; he wanted to express his views, not score points, and I respected him for that a lot, since it's something I have trouble doing sometimes.
And 41 is way, way too young. I'm so very sorry to hear this. I will miss his voice here.
My heartfelt condolences to Mrs. Balinsong and your children.
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posted by rtha at 8:36 AM on February 4, 2011 [5 favorites]
And 41 is way, way too young. I'm so very sorry to hear this. I will miss his voice here.
My heartfelt condolences to Mrs. Balinsong and your children.
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posted by rtha at 8:36 AM on February 4, 2011 [5 favorites]
In 2007 I emailed Andrew to see if he could help me learn anything about a sword a friend and I had found in an attic. Andrew really went out of his way to help me. He recommended a forum he was a member of and helped me tailor the post I made to get the maximum number of answers. He even contacted an author who was a member of the forum and a expert on antique swords to get him to post an answer. The answers I received were very helpful in authenticating the sword and determining its value.
I exchanged a bunch of emails with Andrew and he was a really nice guy. 41 is way too young. I am so sorry. Julia if I can ever research something for you, please contact me at mlis.mefi@gmail.com
posted by mlis at 8:39 AM on February 4, 2011 [8 favorites]
I exchanged a bunch of emails with Andrew and he was a really nice guy. 41 is way too young. I am so sorry. Julia if I can ever research something for you, please contact me at mlis.mefi@gmail.com
posted by mlis at 8:39 AM on February 4, 2011 [8 favorites]
I'm very sorry to hear this. His comments here were always worth reading, and he was one of the contributors I'd really have liked to have met in person.
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posted by Harald74 at 8:40 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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posted by Harald74 at 8:40 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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posted by Rock Steady at 8:40 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Rock Steady at 8:40 AM on February 4, 2011
Julia, I am so sorry for your loss.
posted by Pastabagel at 8:40 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Pastabagel at 8:40 AM on February 4, 2011
Julia, I mostly lurk here, but your husband's name is one that will be remembered.
RIP Balisong
posted by Grlnxtdr at 8:47 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
RIP Balisong
posted by Grlnxtdr at 8:47 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
Carpe diem.
posted by crunchland at 8:49 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by crunchland at 8:49 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:53 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:53 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Salvor Hardin at 8:55 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Salvor Hardin at 8:55 AM on February 4, 2011
This year has been a goddamned kick in the teeth.
Balisong, you were one hell of a guy, and your memory will live on for a long time.
posted by boo_radley at 9:05 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
Balisong, you were one hell of a guy, and your memory will live on for a long time.
posted by boo_radley at 9:05 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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posted by crush-onastick at 9:05 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by crush-onastick at 9:05 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by katillathehun at 9:08 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by katillathehun at 9:08 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by BozoBurgerBonanza at 9:11 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by BozoBurgerBonanza at 9:11 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by HandfulOfDust at 9:13 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by HandfulOfDust at 9:13 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by fiercecupcake at 9:17 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by fiercecupcake at 9:17 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by porn in the woods at 9:18 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by porn in the woods at 9:18 AM on February 4, 2011
Oh my goodness. Such a shame. He will be missed. Condolences to his family and friends.
posted by PareidoliaticBoy at 9:22 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by PareidoliaticBoy at 9:22 AM on February 4, 2011
.
This is so sad. I've always enjoyed his comments.
posted by frecklefaerie at 9:23 AM on February 4, 2011
This is so sad. I've always enjoyed his comments.
posted by frecklefaerie at 9:23 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by The Great Big Mulp at 9:29 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 9:29 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Stewriffic at 9:29 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Stewriffic at 9:29 AM on February 4, 2011
I always figured we'd meetup, and it'd be awesome.
Maybe I'm wrong about the way the world works and we still will.
posted by Eideteker at 9:29 AM on February 4, 2011 [5 favorites]
Maybe I'm wrong about the way the world works and we still will.
posted by Eideteker at 9:29 AM on February 4, 2011 [5 favorites]
Julia, thanks so much for thinking of our community during such a difficult time. My thoughts are with you and yours, and my condolences for your loss.
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posted by Elsa at 9:29 AM on February 4, 2011 [3 favorites]
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posted by Elsa at 9:29 AM on February 4, 2011 [3 favorites]
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posted by pemberkins at 9:31 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by pemberkins at 9:31 AM on February 4, 2011
I'm so sorry for your loss. Hug your kiddos tight.
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posted by shmurley at 9:31 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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posted by shmurley at 9:31 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
What a loss. Julia, I am so sorry. Your husband was a thoughtful, entertaining contributor to this community. He must have been a good man. I wish you and your children the best at this terrible time, and for the future.
posted by two or three cars parked under the stars at 9:35 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by two or three cars parked under the stars at 9:35 AM on February 4, 2011
Damn it all. 41? Terrible.
We all trundle on with the quotidian business of our various little lives, worrying about our pasts and our presents and our futures; and how easily that daily routine makes us forget that we may not even have a future. Then something like this reminds us.
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posted by Decani at 9:39 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
We all trundle on with the quotidian business of our various little lives, worrying about our pasts and our presents and our futures; and how easily that daily routine makes us forget that we may not even have a future. Then something like this reminds us.
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posted by Decani at 9:39 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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posted by longdaysjourney at 9:51 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by longdaysjourney at 9:51 AM on February 4, 2011
I am so, so sorry. It's weird, we weren't 'internet buddies' or anything, but the other day I found myself thinking about him all of a sudden and wondering if he was still on Metafilter.
posted by jtron at 9:52 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by jtron at 9:52 AM on February 4, 2011
Very sorry to hear this. My thoughts and prayers are with his family and friends.
posted by fixedgear at 9:52 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by fixedgear at 9:52 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by supercrayon at 10:00 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by supercrayon at 10:00 AM on February 4, 2011
My husband is about his age, and my son is 4. I can all too easily picture myself in Julia's shoes.
Note in the obit: "In lieu of flowers, send donations to ENT FCU, account 551314."
Ent Federal Credit Union
account 551314
P.O. Box 15819
Colorado Springs, CO 80935-5819
800-525-9623
I wish peace for his family.
posted by anastasiav at 10:01 AM on February 4, 2011 [6 favorites]
Note in the obit: "In lieu of flowers, send donations to ENT FCU, account 551314."
Ent Federal Credit Union
account 551314
P.O. Box 15819
Colorado Springs, CO 80935-5819
800-525-9623
I wish peace for his family.
posted by anastasiav at 10:01 AM on February 4, 2011 [6 favorites]
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posted by Cool Papa Bell at 10:02 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 10:02 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Salmonberry at 10:06 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Salmonberry at 10:06 AM on February 4, 2011
Deepest condolences to Julia and his family and friends. Thank you for letting us know.
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posted by readery at 10:08 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by readery at 10:08 AM on February 4, 2011
Way, way too young. My heart goes out to you and your children, Julia.
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posted by goo at 10:09 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by goo at 10:09 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by ottereroticist at 10:13 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by ottereroticist at 10:13 AM on February 4, 2011
I'm so sorry for your loss Julia (for our loss). Andrew will be missed. You are in my prayers.
posted by Divine_Wino at 10:19 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Divine_Wino at 10:19 AM on February 4, 2011
To Julia and family, my condolences. To all of us; *sob*. We've lost another one. *sniff*
posted by Lynsey at 10:24 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by Lynsey at 10:24 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
Very sad news. Balisong was one of the posters I think of when I remember first reading Metafilter.
posted by oneirodynia at 10:24 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by oneirodynia at 10:24 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by infinitefloatingbrains at 10:24 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by infinitefloatingbrains at 10:24 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Hardcore Poser at 10:25 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Hardcore Poser at 10:25 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Lutoslawski at 10:25 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by Lutoslawski at 10:25 AM on February 4, 2011
This is terrible to hear. He was a great contributor to the site and seemed like a good guy. So sorry for your loss.
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posted by eyeballkid at 10:30 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by eyeballkid at 10:30 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by roll truck roll at 10:31 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by roll truck roll at 10:31 AM on February 4, 2011
Aww, man. I liked him.
Though I did get him confused with Baby Balrog on occasion.
Best wishes to his family. I hope some local MeFites can check in on them.
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posted by klangklangston at 10:31 AM on February 4, 2011
Though I did get him confused with Baby Balrog on occasion.
Best wishes to his family. I hope some local MeFites can check in on them.
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posted by klangklangston at 10:31 AM on February 4, 2011
good memories of balisong...this hurts, rest well Andrew and my condolences to Julia and the children.
posted by clavdivs at 10:32 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by clavdivs at 10:32 AM on February 4, 2011
He seemed to like my occasional doggerel. At least, he favorited them. I don't know what to do to mark the genuine loss represented by his passing than to write a few rhymed couplets in his honor, and hope that he would have like them too.
A knife it has its cutting days
And so too Balisong
So we worsen our rebutting ways
Without our friend along
So we wish a sad goodbye
A last and mournful alas, so long
A knife can be a butterfly
And so too Balisong.
posted by Astro Zombie at 10:47 AM on February 4, 2011 [29 favorites]
A knife it has its cutting days
And so too Balisong
So we worsen our rebutting ways
Without our friend along
So we wish a sad goodbye
A last and mournful alas, so long
A knife can be a butterfly
And so too Balisong.
posted by Astro Zombie at 10:47 AM on February 4, 2011 [29 favorites]
2011 was supposed to be better, dammit.
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posted by fairytale of los angeles at 10:57 AM on February 4, 2011 [5 favorites]
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posted by fairytale of los angeles at 10:57 AM on February 4, 2011 [5 favorites]
You know, I find the fact that she took the time to notify Matt, while she's going through what she's going through, says something about how special this community really is.
Julia, I wish peace to you and the children.
The rest of you here, please be well and know how much I appreciate you.
posted by jbickers at 11:02 AM on February 4, 2011 [2 favorites]
Julia, I wish peace to you and the children.
The rest of you here, please be well and know how much I appreciate you.
posted by jbickers at 11:02 AM on February 4, 2011 [2 favorites]
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posted by LobsterMitten at 11:14 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by LobsterMitten at 11:14 AM on February 4, 2011
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Julia, thank you for sharing with us this sad news. I'm sorry we all meet under such tragic circumstances. But please know that you are always connected to an international community of people who respected and cared about Andrew very much. The place is always open and Balisong will forever be remembered here.
posted by iamkimiam at 11:19 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
Julia, thank you for sharing with us this sad news. I'm sorry we all meet under such tragic circumstances. But please know that you are always connected to an international community of people who respected and cared about Andrew very much. The place is always open and Balisong will forever be remembered here.
posted by iamkimiam at 11:19 AM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
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posted by thankyouforyourconsideration at 11:29 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by thankyouforyourconsideration at 11:29 AM on February 4, 2011
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Julia, thank you so much for letting us know. Balisong is a name that I didn't notice often, but when I saw Andrew posting, it was always always thoughtful and patient.
I know that no human being is perfect, but as a community, we were so lucky to have your husband here with us. I liked to think that he raised our level of discourse.
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.
posted by bilabial at 11:38 AM on February 4, 2011
Julia, thank you so much for letting us know. Balisong is a name that I didn't notice often, but when I saw Andrew posting, it was always always thoughtful and patient.
I know that no human being is perfect, but as a community, we were so lucky to have your husband here with us. I liked to think that he raised our level of discourse.
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.
posted by bilabial at 11:38 AM on February 4, 2011
Balisong was always interesting; I will miss him greatly.
RIP dear Balisong.
posted by caddis at 11:42 AM on February 4, 2011
RIP dear Balisong.
posted by caddis at 11:42 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by BitterOldPunk at 11:44 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by BitterOldPunk at 11:44 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by bardophile at 11:49 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by bardophile at 11:49 AM on February 4, 2011
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posted by AElfwine Evenstar at 11:51 AM on February 4, 2011
posted by AElfwine Evenstar at 11:51 AM on February 4, 2011
Oh how sad. Way too young.
Julia, my condolences to you & your family.
posted by madamjujujive at 11:55 AM on February 4, 2011
Julia, my condolences to you & your family.
posted by madamjujujive at 11:55 AM on February 4, 2011
A knife can be a butterfly
And so too Balisong.
That's quiet lovely, AZ.
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posted by Bookhouse at 12:04 PM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
And so too Balisong.
That's quiet lovely, AZ.
.
posted by Bookhouse at 12:04 PM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
I wasn't too familiar with his commenting style, but as I looked back at his posts I found myself saying, "Oh, that one! And that one, too; I remember reading that one, even though it was last year." Such a terrible loss for everyone who knew him -- and, clearly, for those who didn't know him as well.
Julia, as we said to Mrs. Bageena (another too-sudden loss), you're always welcome here. I hope you'll be able to find some comfort, not only in the resources shared within the posts but in the warmth of people who care for you and your family.
posted by Madamina at 12:06 PM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
Julia, as we said to Mrs. Bageena (another too-sudden loss), you're always welcome here. I hope you'll be able to find some comfort, not only in the resources shared within the posts but in the warmth of people who care for you and your family.
posted by Madamina at 12:06 PM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
So shocked and sorry to read this. Balisong was a wonderful member of this community, with a voice and point of view all his own. Most sincere condolences to his family, who I'm sure adored him.
posted by bearwife at 12:07 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by bearwife at 12:07 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by roomthreeseventeen at 12:25 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 12:25 PM on February 4, 2011
41 and two young children. What a horrible thing.
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posted by evilcolonel at 12:26 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by evilcolonel at 12:26 PM on February 4, 2011
Julia, best of wishes for you and your children in such a hard time. So very sorry to hear this news.
posted by torticat at 12:29 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by torticat at 12:29 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by ceri richard at 12:29 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by ceri richard at 12:29 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 12:40 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 12:40 PM on February 4, 2011
God, I'm so sorry. Sometimes life throws things at us that just seem insurmountable. Thank you, Julia, for letting us know, and wishing you the very best.
posted by jokeefe at 12:52 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by jokeefe at 12:52 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by spinifex23 at 12:54 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by spinifex23 at 12:54 PM on February 4, 2011
Thank you for taking the time, Julia. I am really sorry for this loss to you and the kids.
Take care.
posted by Danf at 12:56 PM on February 4, 2011
Take care.
posted by Danf at 12:56 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by darkmatter at 1:00 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by darkmatter at 1:00 PM on February 4, 2011
The consolation of a sudden death is that the man did not suffer, and did not have to linger in a care facility supported by tubes and tanks. The family will not have to make heart-wrenching end of life decisions. Cold comfort, but some comfort.
posted by Cranberry at 1:22 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by Cranberry at 1:22 PM on February 4, 2011
What a loss. I never really knew him, but always kind of thought of Balisong as a mefi fellow-traveler, because we (and not many others!) were into a lot of the same things.
My favorite comment of his is this one, a paean to the American every-day-carry pocketknife. It exemplifies the insightful, informative, and just plain proud manner which marked Balisong's participation on this site; it's a crying shame that we won't see its like again.
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posted by vorfeed at 1:24 PM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
My favorite comment of his is this one, a paean to the American every-day-carry pocketknife. It exemplifies the insightful, informative, and just plain proud manner which marked Balisong's participation on this site; it's a crying shame that we won't see its like again.
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posted by vorfeed at 1:24 PM on February 4, 2011 [1 favorite]
Too young, too young. My condolences to his wife and children.
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posted by dg at 1:26 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by dg at 1:26 PM on February 4, 2011
Julia, thank you for thinking of the community here. I'm very sorry for your loss.
posted by EvaDestruction at 1:26 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by EvaDestruction at 1:26 PM on February 4, 2011
So very sorry to hear of your (our) loss. Rest in peace, Balisong.
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posted by IndigoRain at 1:26 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by IndigoRain at 1:26 PM on February 4, 2011
I'm really sorry to hear about this. My best wishes for your family, Julia.
posted by stinkycheese at 1:31 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by stinkycheese at 1:31 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by joe lisboa at 1:48 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by joe lisboa at 1:48 PM on February 4, 2011
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My sincere condolences to his family. I recognized the username right away. He made a real contribution to Mefi, sometimes by swimming against the tide and making us think about the positions we hold dear.
posted by desjardins at 1:51 PM on February 4, 2011
My sincere condolences to his family. I recognized the username right away. He made a real contribution to Mefi, sometimes by swimming against the tide and making us think about the positions we hold dear.
posted by desjardins at 1:51 PM on February 4, 2011
Oh, awful. His children are so young - much too little to lose their dad. My thoughts are with them and their mama.
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posted by thehmsbeagle at 1:58 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by thehmsbeagle at 1:58 PM on February 4, 2011
-ages 4 and 2-
geez, that makes the sad hang heavier.
Thanks for thinking of us Julie and best wishes for a tolerable way forward.
posted by peacay at 2:07 PM on February 4, 2011
geez, that makes the sad hang heavier.
Thanks for thinking of us Julie and best wishes for a tolerable way forward.
posted by peacay at 2:07 PM on February 4, 2011
so sad for your loss, julia.
so sad for our loss, metafilter.
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posted by msconduct at 2:15 PM on February 4, 2011
so sad for our loss, metafilter.
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posted by msconduct at 2:15 PM on February 4, 2011
I am so sorry to hear this. I liked Balisong very much.
posted by winna at 2:21 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by winna at 2:21 PM on February 4, 2011
wow this is so shocking. he was so young....my heart goes out to his young family
posted by supermedusa at 2:22 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by supermedusa at 2:22 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by longsleeves at 2:22 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by longsleeves at 2:22 PM on February 4, 2011
Oh, this is horrible. His wife and children have all my thoughts right now. Rest in peace Balisong.
posted by OmieWise at 2:37 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by OmieWise at 2:37 PM on February 4, 2011
Oh geeze. My condolences to you and your kids, Julia. I will miss Balisong's voice here.
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posted by ooga_booga at 2:50 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by ooga_booga at 2:50 PM on February 4, 2011
Aw crap, man. He always cracked me up. And he's my age. That sucks.
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posted by lumpenprole at 3:03 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by lumpenprole at 3:03 PM on February 4, 2011
I'm so sorry. And we shared the same birthday too.
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posted by Tesseractive at 3:05 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Tesseractive at 3:05 PM on February 4, 2011
Oh crap. I hate this so hard.
[I sometimes wish that I could hope that the song My Blue Heaven is about the place the Mefites gather after life to comment on world affairs. This is one of those times.]
posted by pjern at 3:05 PM on February 4, 2011 [3 favorites]
[I sometimes wish that I could hope that the song My Blue Heaven is about the place the Mefites gather after life to comment on world affairs. This is one of those times.]
posted by pjern at 3:05 PM on February 4, 2011 [3 favorites]
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posted by penguin pie at 3:18 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by penguin pie at 3:18 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by TheophileEscargot at 3:38 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by TheophileEscargot at 3:38 PM on February 4, 2011
My condolences, Julia. Balisong was a memorable part of Metafilter. I will miss him. My thoughts are with you and your children.
posted by halonine at 3:56 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by halonine at 3:56 PM on February 4, 2011
I never met balisong in person, but I read enough of his comments here to think he was a good man.
I'll miss his contributions.
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posted by lekvar at 3:57 PM on February 4, 2011
I'll miss his contributions.
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posted by lekvar at 3:57 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 3:58 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 3:58 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 4:00 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 4:00 PM on February 4, 2011
I am so sorry for your loss, Julia, and for your children's loss. 41 is far too young.
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posted by mosk at 4:37 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by mosk at 4:37 PM on February 4, 2011
That's a damn shame. I'm very sorry for your loss, Julia. Thank you for letting us all know.
posted by msalt at 5:05 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by msalt at 5:05 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by foggy out there now at 5:09 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by foggy out there now at 5:09 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by flibbertigibbet at 5:26 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by flibbertigibbet at 5:26 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Navelgazer at 5:34 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by Navelgazer at 5:34 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Meta Filter at 5:39 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by Meta Filter at 5:39 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by cooker girl at 5:39 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by cooker girl at 5:39 PM on February 4, 2011
This is terrible news, and I am incredibly touched that Julia thought to let us know, when she is sure to be still very much in shock. I'm another one who didn't agree much with him, but he really seemed like a lovely guy, someone you'd really enjoy sitting down and arguing with, with no hard feelings after. From the tiny bit of his personality I saw here, he seemed like someone who'd be easy to like: intelligent, thoughtful and opinionated, but still a nice guy. I know he will be missed here, by people who (mostly) never even met him in person, so I am sure he will be fondly and long-remembered by those who knew him in person.
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posted by biscotti at 5:43 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by biscotti at 5:43 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by sgt.serenity at 5:49 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by sgt.serenity at 5:49 PM on February 4, 2011
That truly and totally sucks rocks. My condolences to his family.
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posted by patheral at 5:54 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by patheral at 5:54 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by thinkpiece at 5:56 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by thinkpiece at 5:56 PM on February 4, 2011
He was a grouchy old crank in the absolute best sense of the word, and he will be missed.
posted by infinitywaltz at 6:11 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by infinitywaltz at 6:11 PM on February 4, 2011
Balisong seemed nice. What a terrible shame. And those poor little kids, losing him just as they're old enough to miss him. Very sad.
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posted by Gator at 6:12 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Gator at 6:12 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by divide_by_cucumber at 6:20 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by divide_by_cucumber at 6:20 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by contrariwise at 6:31 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by contrariwise at 6:31 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by initapplette at 6:35 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by initapplette at 6:35 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by limeonaire at 6:59 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by limeonaire at 6:59 PM on February 4, 2011
Lo! some we loved, the loveliest and best
That Time and Fate of all their Vintage prest,
Have drunk their Cup a Round or two before,
And one by one crept silently to Rest.
-Rubáiyát of Omar Khayyám
be well
posted by edgeways at 7:04 PM on February 4, 2011 [3 favorites]
That Time and Fate of all their Vintage prest,
Have drunk their Cup a Round or two before,
And one by one crept silently to Rest.
-Rubáiyát of Omar Khayyám
be well
posted by edgeways at 7:04 PM on February 4, 2011 [3 favorites]
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posted by mynameisluka at 7:05 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by mynameisluka at 7:05 PM on February 4, 2011
I'm so sorry to hear about Balisong. He was a fine contributor to this place; his words will be here for as long as here is here and that's a good thing. My deepest condolences, Julia.
posted by h00py at 7:18 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by h00py at 7:18 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by kid ichorous at 7:39 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by kid ichorous at 7:39 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Crabby Appleton at 7:46 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by Crabby Appleton at 7:46 PM on February 4, 2011
So sorry to hear this. I enjoyed Balisong's contributions. Julia, it was very thoughtful of you to let the community know.
Wishing you peace and comfort.
posted by amyms at 7:54 PM on February 4, 2011
Wishing you peace and comfort.
posted by amyms at 7:54 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by TrialByMedia at 8:54 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by TrialByMedia at 8:54 PM on February 4, 2011
Balisong signed up on 18th Nov 2004, along with me & the other very first $5 noobs, when signups opened again after a long freeze.
Right up until this thread last December, I always parsed his name as a "song from Bali", thinking gamelans & terraced rice paddies, Hindus & hippies, frangipani, hibiscus & incense, beaches and palm trees. Maybe throw in a bamboo flute, culturally incorrect or not, to complete the scene.
Over six years with that image in my mind, and it turned out that it's actually the name of a flick-knife, the kind that might be carried by a gangster or petty thief lout.
Not that this revelation changed my opinion of him; I never completely got the peaceful Balinese imagery out of my head. May he rest in exactly that kind of peace; it's a beautiful image.
posted by UbuRoivas at 8:57 PM on February 4, 2011 [7 favorites]
Right up until this thread last December, I always parsed his name as a "song from Bali", thinking gamelans & terraced rice paddies, Hindus & hippies, frangipani, hibiscus & incense, beaches and palm trees. Maybe throw in a bamboo flute, culturally incorrect or not, to complete the scene.
Over six years with that image in my mind, and it turned out that it's actually the name of a flick-knife, the kind that might be carried by a gangster or petty thief lout.
Not that this revelation changed my opinion of him; I never completely got the peaceful Balinese imagery out of my head. May he rest in exactly that kind of peace; it's a beautiful image.
posted by UbuRoivas at 8:57 PM on February 4, 2011 [7 favorites]
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posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:57 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:57 PM on February 4, 2011
With more than a hundred thousand of us here now, I often wonder how newcomers make any sense of the noise and if anyone really associates a particular voice to a username anymore.
For me, one voice I very much recognized and enjoyed is now silent. I'm very sorry to hear it.
Peace.
posted by 1f2frfbf at 9:01 PM on February 4, 2011
For me, one voice I very much recognized and enjoyed is now silent. I'm very sorry to hear it.
Peace.
posted by 1f2frfbf at 9:01 PM on February 4, 2011
Death is in the middle of life and nothing is truly certain.
How horrible for his family for him to die so young.
My sincere condolances.
posted by joost de vries at 9:09 PM on February 4, 2011
How horrible for his family for him to die so young.
My sincere condolances.
posted by joost de vries at 9:09 PM on February 4, 2011
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Whenever I've had brushes with grave illness and the passing of those I love, I find that Freddie Mercury's late work gives me strength. He will be remembered.
posted by Existential Dread at 9:26 PM on February 4, 2011
Whenever I've had brushes with grave illness and the passing of those I love, I find that Freddie Mercury's late work gives me strength. He will be remembered.
posted by Existential Dread at 9:26 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by rangefinder 1.4 at 9:35 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by rangefinder 1.4 at 9:35 PM on February 4, 2011
Some time ago, Balisong made a comment that raised my hackles (I don't even remember what it was now). I clicked his profile and as soon as I saw his picture, my hackles went down. That smile reminded me that behind each comment here is an actual person.
Even now, when someone makes a comment that raises my grar level, I check their profile before responding. I always find a reason to let it go.
Rest in peace, Balisong, and thank you for the friendly smile.
posted by dogmom at 9:50 PM on February 4, 2011 [6 favorites]
Even now, when someone makes a comment that raises my grar level, I check their profile before responding. I always find a reason to let it go.
Rest in peace, Balisong, and thank you for the friendly smile.
posted by dogmom at 9:50 PM on February 4, 2011 [6 favorites]
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posted by CrystalDave at 10:11 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by CrystalDave at 10:11 PM on February 4, 2011
Those young kids - so heartbreaking. My thoughts are with Julia and kids.
posted by bluedaisy at 10:16 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by bluedaisy at 10:16 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by Slarty Bartfast at 11:09 PM on February 4, 2011
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 11:09 PM on February 4, 2011
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posted by dirigibleman at 12:13 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by dirigibleman at 12:13 AM on February 5, 2011
I'm so sorry to learn this. I really enjoyed his comments. 41 is too young.
posted by orthogonality at 12:22 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by orthogonality at 12:22 AM on February 5, 2011
My grandfather died of a heart attack at 44; two uncles from the other side of the family in their fifties. I survived one.
It's so arbitrary. A blockage in one artery on one side of the heart is often survivable if you get care real soon; in the corresponding artery on the other side of the heart, no real chance. It comes down to where the cholesterol plaque formed; I was 90%+ blocked in one artery, only 20% in the artery on the other side.
Three years before my MI, I easily passed a stress test. My Dad got lucky when five blockages happened to be detected when he was in his thirties. If that hadn't been noticed, he's surely be dead now. His brothers seemed healthier: indeed, both were jogging when they died. I should exercise, but there's no way I'm going to take up jogging.
And what's more frustrating is that a heart attack is so sudden. So immediate, no time to say goodbye or put your affairs in order. Someone you love is there, then they're gone, just clipped out of the frame of your life in a instant, leaving a hole in your world.
Sometimes I'm so scared by that -- by the death, but even more by the suddenness --, that I can't sleep. Of course, lack of sleep causes inflammation, which increases the risk of... heart attack. It just happens. Sure, there are warning signs. Which are essentially indistinguishable from acid reflex or back pains. It's just arbitrary, it happens when it will.
Julia, I've been there. I was just luckier than Andrew was. So I can tell you this, I think: it is sudden, and arbitrary, and even if you have time to realize what's going on, you're pretty distracted by what's going on, by comprehending what's happening to you, by trying to deal with it.
I know it doesn't help much, and I hope I'm not being too forward, too personal.
But during a heart attack, whether you have time or strength or stamina left to say it -- or even if in extremis, you're no longer physically able to say it -- you are thinking of those you love, wishing you had the time to tell them that you'll miss them, wanting to hold them one last time, wishing to once again tell them what they mean to you. And to tell them that while this is really bad, that they'll get through it, and that a big part of the pain isn't just physical, but knowing you won't be able to be there in person for them, to help them get through it. And to tell them how much they've enriched your life in the too short time you've had.
I don't know if during his heart attack, Andrew had the chance to tell you and your kids this, but I can attest from personal experience that he was thinking it.
posted by orthogonality at 1:06 AM on February 5, 2011 [26 favorites]
It's so arbitrary. A blockage in one artery on one side of the heart is often survivable if you get care real soon; in the corresponding artery on the other side of the heart, no real chance. It comes down to where the cholesterol plaque formed; I was 90%+ blocked in one artery, only 20% in the artery on the other side.
Three years before my MI, I easily passed a stress test. My Dad got lucky when five blockages happened to be detected when he was in his thirties. If that hadn't been noticed, he's surely be dead now. His brothers seemed healthier: indeed, both were jogging when they died. I should exercise, but there's no way I'm going to take up jogging.
And what's more frustrating is that a heart attack is so sudden. So immediate, no time to say goodbye or put your affairs in order. Someone you love is there, then they're gone, just clipped out of the frame of your life in a instant, leaving a hole in your world.
Sometimes I'm so scared by that -- by the death, but even more by the suddenness --, that I can't sleep. Of course, lack of sleep causes inflammation, which increases the risk of... heart attack. It just happens. Sure, there are warning signs. Which are essentially indistinguishable from acid reflex or back pains. It's just arbitrary, it happens when it will.
Julia, I've been there. I was just luckier than Andrew was. So I can tell you this, I think: it is sudden, and arbitrary, and even if you have time to realize what's going on, you're pretty distracted by what's going on, by comprehending what's happening to you, by trying to deal with it.
I know it doesn't help much, and I hope I'm not being too forward, too personal.
But during a heart attack, whether you have time or strength or stamina left to say it -- or even if in extremis, you're no longer physically able to say it -- you are thinking of those you love, wishing you had the time to tell them that you'll miss them, wanting to hold them one last time, wishing to once again tell them what they mean to you. And to tell them that while this is really bad, that they'll get through it, and that a big part of the pain isn't just physical, but knowing you won't be able to be there in person for them, to help them get through it. And to tell them how much they've enriched your life in the too short time you've had.
I don't know if during his heart attack, Andrew had the chance to tell you and your kids this, but I can attest from personal experience that he was thinking it.
posted by orthogonality at 1:06 AM on February 5, 2011 [26 favorites]
Oh no, how sad. I'm so sorry, Julia.
RIP Balisong.
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posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 1:44 AM on February 5, 2011
RIP Balisong.
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posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 1:44 AM on February 5, 2011
Julia, I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for letting us all know. Please have some peace.
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posted by nevercalm at 2:57 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by nevercalm at 2:57 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by Mister Bijou at 3:40 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by Mister Bijou at 3:40 AM on February 5, 2011
Julia, you share your name with my daughter. I'm a year older than your late Andrew. I feel your loss in my bones. I'm so sorry this happened.
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posted by lilywing13 at 3:48 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by lilywing13 at 3:48 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by monster truck weekend at 3:51 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by monster truck weekend at 3:51 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by arcticseal at 5:11 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by arcticseal at 5:11 AM on February 5, 2011
My deepest condolences. It's a terrible shock.
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posted by Smart Dalek at 5:22 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by Smart Dalek at 5:22 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by hydropsyche at 5:28 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by hydropsyche at 5:28 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by harriet vane at 6:54 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by harriet vane at 6:54 AM on February 5, 2011
Oh no. I'm so sorry for your loss, Julia. Please give an extra hug to the children from us; losing a parent at that age is so hard and I wish you and them all the love in the world.
posted by mediareport at 6:57 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by mediareport at 6:57 AM on February 5, 2011
Julia, I'm so sorry. My thoughts are with you and your family.
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posted by apricot at 7:15 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by apricot at 7:15 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by EatTheWeek at 9:17 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by EatTheWeek at 9:17 AM on February 5, 2011
I'm terribly sorry, Julia.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 9:39 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by kittens for breakfast at 9:39 AM on February 5, 2011
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posted by hot soup girl at 9:41 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by hot soup girl at 9:41 AM on February 5, 2011
A valuable contributor to our community. I will miss him. I'm very sorry for your loss, Julia.
posted by Kwine at 10:30 AM on February 5, 2011
posted by Kwine at 10:30 AM on February 5, 2011
Oh that smile, and his comments, and his gentlemanly restraint in the face of adversity. I am saddened by his loss.
I lost my father suddenly to heart disease when he was 54. I was 19 and even then I had a hard time handling his death so my thoughts are with his family. Community support is comforting when sudden tragedies like this occur, and so like many others, Julia, I'm so sorry for your loss. Hopefully you know from this thread that there is a community of people here who cared deeply for him and welcome you here.
posted by miss-lapin at 10:57 AM on February 5, 2011
I lost my father suddenly to heart disease when he was 54. I was 19 and even then I had a hard time handling his death so my thoughts are with his family. Community support is comforting when sudden tragedies like this occur, and so like many others, Julia, I'm so sorry for your loss. Hopefully you know from this thread that there is a community of people here who cared deeply for him and welcome you here.
posted by miss-lapin at 10:57 AM on February 5, 2011
Julia, I know three things about your husband, all gleaned from his posts and comments here: he had an interesting, quirky mind; he knew a whole lot about knives; he loved you and your kids more than anything in the world, so much so that anytime he mentioned you or them, love and joy and pride radiated from the words.
I am so, so sorry. Please remember to take care of yourself.
posted by dogrose at 11:41 AM on February 5, 2011 [2 favorites]
I am so, so sorry. Please remember to take care of yourself.
posted by dogrose at 11:41 AM on February 5, 2011 [2 favorites]
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A distinct and gentlemanly voice silenced all too soon.
Julia, thank you for sharing with us his passing. May you and the children be well, and find peace.
Should you need anything from us, let us know.
We will do what we can.
First Bill, then Andrew... 2011 WAS supposed to be kinder...
I guess we will have to be kinder to each other, still
Love and Light to all MeFites...
posted by PROD_TPSL at 11:41 AM on February 5, 2011
A distinct and gentlemanly voice silenced all too soon.
Julia, thank you for sharing with us his passing. May you and the children be well, and find peace.
Should you need anything from us, let us know.
We will do what we can.
First Bill, then Andrew... 2011 WAS supposed to be kinder...
I guess we will have to be kinder to each other, still
Love and Light to all MeFites...
posted by PROD_TPSL at 11:41 AM on February 5, 2011
I'm so terribly sorry to hear this -- 41 is way too young. Even when we disagreed with each other, I'm another one who could always see from Andrew's comments how deeply he adored and cherished his family. Julia, my heart goes out to you and your children. Peace.
posted by scody at 12:32 PM on February 5, 2011
posted by scody at 12:32 PM on February 5, 2011
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posted by LittleKnitting at 1:08 PM on February 5, 2011
posted by LittleKnitting at 1:08 PM on February 5, 2011
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posted by St. Sorryass at 2:34 PM on February 5, 2011
posted by St. Sorryass at 2:34 PM on February 5, 2011
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posted by safetyfork at 4:43 PM on February 5, 2011
posted by safetyfork at 4:43 PM on February 5, 2011
RIP Balisong
I liked his style. He will be missed here.
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posted by Sk4n at 6:04 PM on February 5, 2011
I liked his style. He will be missed here.
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posted by Sk4n at 6:04 PM on February 5, 2011
"He is also survived by his parents.."
this is where I teared up. so, so sorry for everybody. he will be missed.
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posted by victors at 7:16 PM on February 5, 2011
this is where I teared up. so, so sorry for everybody. he will be missed.
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posted by victors at 7:16 PM on February 5, 2011
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posted by Wuggie Norple at 8:11 PM on February 5, 2011
posted by Wuggie Norple at 8:11 PM on February 5, 2011
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posted by sarcasticah at 9:47 PM on February 5, 2011
posted by sarcasticah at 9:47 PM on February 5, 2011
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posted by trip and a half at 10:00 PM on February 5, 2011
posted by trip and a half at 10:00 PM on February 5, 2011
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posted by disclaimer at 10:27 PM on February 5, 2011
posted by disclaimer at 10:27 PM on February 5, 2011
I am so, so sorry. I always was very interested in what he had to say. Too awful :(
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posted by tristeza at 11:40 PM on February 5, 2011
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posted by tristeza at 11:40 PM on February 5, 2011
My condolences to his wife, kids, and family. What a tragedy.
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posted by defenestration at 12:08 PM on February 6, 2011
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posted by defenestration at 12:08 PM on February 6, 2011
Strangely, I dreamed about this last night. I dreamed that I was sitting at a kitchen table talking to Julia (whom I've never met, of course) and that she said something like "Many people have longer lives, but I'm not sure they had better ones. He had so much joy."
Take it for what it's worth - I didn't know him well enough to know whether it's an accurate sort of statement, but the sentiment moved me and I hope he did have a life full of joy.
posted by Miko at 12:10 PM on February 6, 2011 [3 favorites]
Take it for what it's worth - I didn't know him well enough to know whether it's an accurate sort of statement, but the sentiment moved me and I hope he did have a life full of joy.
posted by Miko at 12:10 PM on February 6, 2011 [3 favorites]
This is so shocking and tragic, his passing so young and leaving such small children. I am so sorry, Julia. I hope that his comments here will serve as a lifelong reminder for his children of how devoted he was to them, how passionate about their upbringing.
posted by palliser at 2:27 PM on February 6, 2011
posted by palliser at 2:27 PM on February 6, 2011
I am really saddened to hear this. I'm neither a prolific commenter nor poster, but Balisong was one of the people I really looked forward to hearing from when I first came here (I'm an 18K-er) and ever since.
Julia, I am so sorry to hear of your loss, and agreeing with everyone that he left far, far too soon.
posted by exlotuseater at 4:24 PM on February 6, 2011
Julia, I am so sorry to hear of your loss, and agreeing with everyone that he left far, far too soon.
posted by exlotuseater at 4:24 PM on February 6, 2011
.
posted by byanyothername at 7:06 PM on February 6, 2011
posted by byanyothername at 7:06 PM on February 6, 2011
I hate just leaving a dot, but everything I write sounds trite or otherwise wrong. I was, as a result, going to slink off and pretend I hadn't noticed, but I can't.
Balisong was a really good bloke. He made me laugh and he made me think. He made Metafilter a better place for being here, and I'm sure he made the outside world better too.
RIP
posted by GeckoDundee at 8:39 PM on February 6, 2011 [1 favorite]
Balisong was a really good bloke. He made me laugh and he made me think. He made Metafilter a better place for being here, and I'm sure he made the outside world better too.
RIP
posted by GeckoDundee at 8:39 PM on February 6, 2011 [1 favorite]
My condolences to Julia as well -- I am so sorry to hear this news.
posted by y2karl at 9:59 PM on February 6, 2011
posted by y2karl at 9:59 PM on February 6, 2011
.
posted by The Esteemed Doctor Bunsen Honeydew at 10:55 PM on February 6, 2011
posted by The Esteemed Doctor Bunsen Honeydew at 10:55 PM on February 6, 2011
.
posted by generalist at 7:36 AM on February 7, 2011
posted by generalist at 7:36 AM on February 7, 2011
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Thank-you for taking the time to tell us, at what must be a terrible time for you.
.
posted by alasdair at 1:35 PM on February 7, 2011
.
posted by alasdair at 1:35 PM on February 7, 2011
Oh, man, Balisong was a big part of our community. I don't recall if he and I ever had a specific moment of communication but, like others have written here, his comments were frequently intelligent and he could drop a witty five word comment with the best of them.
So sorry for your family's loss, Julia. Sorry for our community's loss, too.
posted by Joey Michaels at 2:54 PM on February 7, 2011
So sorry for your family's loss, Julia. Sorry for our community's loss, too.
posted by Joey Michaels at 2:54 PM on February 7, 2011
("frequently intelligent" wasn't what I meant to post - I managed to delete some words in the middle - I originally wrote "frequently outstanding and always intelligent")
posted by Joey Michaels at 2:57 PM on February 7, 2011
posted by Joey Michaels at 2:57 PM on February 7, 2011
.
posted by 404 Not Found at 3:15 PM on February 7, 2011
posted by 404 Not Found at 3:15 PM on February 7, 2011
.
posted by VelveteenBabbitt at 5:08 PM on February 7, 2011
posted by VelveteenBabbitt at 5:08 PM on February 7, 2011
.
posted by sandraregina at 6:19 PM on February 7, 2011
posted by sandraregina at 6:19 PM on February 7, 2011
.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 9:41 PM on February 7, 2011
posted by Solon and Thanks at 9:41 PM on February 7, 2011
.
posted by Richard Daly at 9:46 PM on February 7, 2011
posted by Richard Daly at 9:46 PM on February 7, 2011
Aww, dear Julia, what a tremendous shock to read this news! I'm so utterly sorry for the loss you and your two small children are facing.
I really enjoyed Balisong's presence on the blue. Hearing about his sudden and much too early death makes me cry.
His comments gave me a distinct impression of his character, that he was intelligent, thoughtful, fun, funny, direct, honest, passionate, dedicated, unpretentious, caring. I will miss him. Looking at the photograph on his profile page he does radiate joy. I'm sure you and his children were very much part of that joy.
It's my experience in losing loved ones that their presence does live on. There is an essay that has helped me profoundly over the years, I don't know what your beliefs are but perhaps this may offer you some comfort too. Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing To Do With God.
It's a powerful thought imagining that "he spent much of his daily free time reading and posting to [MetaFilter]", to know we were valued in his life and he in ours.
My loving thoughts to you, your children, his parents and his sister.
posted by nickyskye at 10:23 PM on February 7, 2011 [2 favorites]
I really enjoyed Balisong's presence on the blue. Hearing about his sudden and much too early death makes me cry.
His comments gave me a distinct impression of his character, that he was intelligent, thoughtful, fun, funny, direct, honest, passionate, dedicated, unpretentious, caring. I will miss him. Looking at the photograph on his profile page he does radiate joy. I'm sure you and his children were very much part of that joy.
It's my experience in losing loved ones that their presence does live on. There is an essay that has helped me profoundly over the years, I don't know what your beliefs are but perhaps this may offer you some comfort too. Comforting Thoughts About Death That Have Nothing To Do With God.
It's a powerful thought imagining that "he spent much of his daily free time reading and posting to [MetaFilter]", to know we were valued in his life and he in ours.
My loving thoughts to you, your children, his parents and his sister.
posted by nickyskye at 10:23 PM on February 7, 2011 [2 favorites]
PS I would like to send a donation to
Ent Federal Credit Union
account 551314
P.O. Box 15819
Colorado Springs, CO 80935-5819
800-525-9623
but do not know how to do that via PayPal. Perhaps somebody here can advise me?
Or I can snail mail a check with Ent Federal Credit Union account 551314 in the Pay To the Order Of line?
posted by nickyskye at 10:30 PM on February 7, 2011
Ent Federal Credit Union
account 551314
P.O. Box 15819
Colorado Springs, CO 80935-5819
800-525-9623
but do not know how to do that via PayPal. Perhaps somebody here can advise me?
Or I can snail mail a check with Ent Federal Credit Union account 551314 in the Pay To the Order Of line?
posted by nickyskye at 10:30 PM on February 7, 2011
Or I can snail mail a check with Ent Federal Credit Union account 551314 in the Pay To the Order Of line?
Yes, for paper checks you can write the account number on the "Pay to" line, but for clarity's sake it's best to also use the name associated with the account. Usually it's something like "Bullock Memorial Fund" or "Bullock Children's Educational Fund" but in this case, since it's not specified in the obituary, simpy putting "Bullock, Acct. 551314" in the "Pay to" line should be sufficient. You can also include a little note along with the check so the credit union knows what your intentions are.
posted by amyms at 11:24 AM on February 8, 2011 [1 favorite]
Yes, for paper checks you can write the account number on the "Pay to" line, but for clarity's sake it's best to also use the name associated with the account. Usually it's something like "Bullock Memorial Fund" or "Bullock Children's Educational Fund" but in this case, since it's not specified in the obituary, simpy putting "Bullock, Acct. 551314" in the "Pay to" line should be sufficient. You can also include a little note along with the check so the credit union knows what your intentions are.
posted by amyms at 11:24 AM on February 8, 2011 [1 favorite]
Hi Julia, I'm a local mefite in Colorado Springs. I never met your husband, but I always enjoyed his comments -- the years when I was living out of state, his words and humor reminded me what a strange and wonderful little gunbarrel town we have. I am so sorry for your loss. Please do reach out if I can help, even a little.
posted by mochapickle at 11:32 AM on February 8, 2011
posted by mochapickle at 11:32 AM on February 8, 2011
.
posted by Halloween Jack at 11:38 AM on February 8, 2011
posted by Halloween Jack at 11:38 AM on February 8, 2011
.
posted by allkindsoftime at 11:03 PM on February 8, 2011
posted by allkindsoftime at 11:03 PM on February 8, 2011
.
posted by merelyglib at 11:53 PM on February 8, 2011
posted by merelyglib at 11:53 PM on February 8, 2011
I since learned that some people don't always think a favorite 'means' something specifically, but, I know to me, this one Balisong shared with me meant a great deal, particularly when it first appeared. It was on one of my first comments ever here, and one which I imagined would not have been particularly 'well received' everywhere, likely not so well taken in all places, and easy enough to ignore. Not that this 'favorite' meant it was intended as "favorite", but however it was intended, that signal that someone had seen words I posted, and taken time to look at it, it encouraged, even pushed me to continue to share thoughts, even if I didn't actually always post them, and to do as was done for me the same, by reading what others write and wrote, and to engage with an eye to open-mindedness, and consideration of the differences and similarities we all have, attempts at understanding the elements -the times, places and spaces- that had shaped others, this all helped shape my feeling that this was a place I could find people who would challenge me, my assumptions, help me find ways of understanding the world around me, and where I might also learn from the experiences of others. A favorite may not inherently 'mean' something specific, but this one was indisputably important to me, and I will continue to value this small way I was able to be a part of the life of people who continually surprise me, and in particular Balisong, thank you for bringing me into your world in that small way, my thoughts are for your family. Sleep secure. The world is a less vibrant place for all of the losses this community has seen, I am sorry I never said thank you to you... the interactions you had have surely shaped people here, people who will go on, and hopefully continue to consider the ways you were, and so your words and ideas, like your children as they grow, will continue to shape this world. Thank you; thank you Julia, for sharing your husband with everyone here.
I am tremendously sorry at the loss of this (and every) member of the community, as noted by others, and shown in his own words, he was clearly a considerate, devoted and wonderful father and husband, a thoughtful person, he played a part in making me look closely at this community. I appreciate so very much how people share their minds here, often intimate details and the most personal elements of themselves with this community (it never ceases to amaze me how well people can do this, and often with a few short concise words, [I'm learning, I'm trying to shorten])... I am so sorry for the loss to the world; this community has lost so many in a short time, I do not mean to ignore others who have been lost either, for reasons external, I was sort of unable to find and put right words in sequence, a way to express how deep was the level of loss, to find the right space to express. We ([if as a new user I may use that signifier], and I did not know personally those lost, so I am sorry, and so very much do not at all intend to take from those who did know, from those who know the pain of loss so much more acutely than I possibly could) have lost so many people this year, it is overwhelming. But also the responses have been overwhelming to me. One cannot find a more developed and considering community, nor, I imagine, would one want to. As seemingly always here, it is stunning to me how events in a 'simple' online setting create, and enflame a desire to help, to be a part of other people as they struggle through the battles, victories and tragedies of life - from simple questions and answers, to the most important decisions, to understanding society, challenge and change - people here prepared to help others with all things, giving freely of possibly the only truly non-renewable resource in the universe... Time.
As ever, I find myself wishing I could simply give time from my own little hourglass, to allow one more day to those lost so soon, literally, too soon. I am sorry. People out there, please stay strong, don't give up hope, just don't give up. You matter. You do. I forget to say this enough. It doesn't mean it isn't true. Each and every person has a vital part to play in shaping the way our world works, operates and interacts, it is the gift of being human to use this super-power to show others new ways of thinking, to exchange ideas, give and take, to reshape the ideas of others - and to borrow the words and sentiment of others, allowing them to permeate and even reshape our own thinking - you really never know who is thinking about something you say or do. I am thankful to everyone who shares their thoughts, ideas, and unique way of perceiving and understanding their differing perspective on the world. We are all richer for it. Because it is important to note, and I have not often enough stated; it gets better. For together we will make it so.
What is it that made this world now seem so-suddenly-vast?
As you will see, hearts' flags still wave at half of their mast.
Lives have been stolen, we all share this sudden undeniable grief.
It just isn't fair, how can we hope to catch such an invisible thief?
You are all so much more than I know, so much more than I dare,
If we were all tested, surely I could never even ever compare;
As we all are gathered upon this broken down day
Seeking in vain, to find just the right words to say…
We know you'd be saying, that we need to stay standing strong
Keep making me realize, I haven’t even been here that long
But the time that I have, is worth more now than I know
I only wish I could share it, so now you just won’t have to go
.
posted by infinite intimation at 12:10 AM on February 17, 2011 [4 favorites]
I am tremendously sorry at the loss of this (and every) member of the community, as noted by others, and shown in his own words, he was clearly a considerate, devoted and wonderful father and husband, a thoughtful person, he played a part in making me look closely at this community. I appreciate so very much how people share their minds here, often intimate details and the most personal elements of themselves with this community (it never ceases to amaze me how well people can do this, and often with a few short concise words, [I'm learning, I'm trying to shorten])... I am so sorry for the loss to the world; this community has lost so many in a short time, I do not mean to ignore others who have been lost either, for reasons external, I was sort of unable to find and put right words in sequence, a way to express how deep was the level of loss, to find the right space to express. We ([if as a new user I may use that signifier], and I did not know personally those lost, so I am sorry, and so very much do not at all intend to take from those who did know, from those who know the pain of loss so much more acutely than I possibly could) have lost so many people this year, it is overwhelming. But also the responses have been overwhelming to me. One cannot find a more developed and considering community, nor, I imagine, would one want to. As seemingly always here, it is stunning to me how events in a 'simple' online setting create, and enflame a desire to help, to be a part of other people as they struggle through the battles, victories and tragedies of life - from simple questions and answers, to the most important decisions, to understanding society, challenge and change - people here prepared to help others with all things, giving freely of possibly the only truly non-renewable resource in the universe... Time.
As ever, I find myself wishing I could simply give time from my own little hourglass, to allow one more day to those lost so soon, literally, too soon. I am sorry. People out there, please stay strong, don't give up hope, just don't give up. You matter. You do. I forget to say this enough. It doesn't mean it isn't true. Each and every person has a vital part to play in shaping the way our world works, operates and interacts, it is the gift of being human to use this super-power to show others new ways of thinking, to exchange ideas, give and take, to reshape the ideas of others - and to borrow the words and sentiment of others, allowing them to permeate and even reshape our own thinking - you really never know who is thinking about something you say or do. I am thankful to everyone who shares their thoughts, ideas, and unique way of perceiving and understanding their differing perspective on the world. We are all richer for it. Because it is important to note, and I have not often enough stated; it gets better. For together we will make it so.
What is it that made this world now seem so-suddenly-vast?
As you will see, hearts' flags still wave at half of their mast.
Lives have been stolen, we all share this sudden undeniable grief.
It just isn't fair, how can we hope to catch such an invisible thief?
You are all so much more than I know, so much more than I dare,
If we were all tested, surely I could never even ever compare;
As we all are gathered upon this broken down day
Seeking in vain, to find just the right words to say…
We know you'd be saying, that we need to stay standing strong
Keep making me realize, I haven’t even been here that long
But the time that I have, is worth more now than I know
I only wish I could share it, so now you just won’t have to go
.
posted by infinite intimation at 12:10 AM on February 17, 2011 [4 favorites]
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.
posted by inturnaround at 7:17 AM on February 4, 2011