first March 29, 2011 10:31 PM   Subscribe

So is this a place where no one types 'first' comments, or do you guys just delete them with a vengeance before anyone sees them?
posted by 31d1 to Etiquette/Policy at 10:31 PM (358 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite

FIRST POST!
posted by rob paxon at 10:32 PM on March 29, 2011 [6 favorites]


SECOND POST!!
posted by orthogonality at 10:34 PM on March 29, 2011


FIRST THIRD POST!
posted by firstdrop at 10:39 PM on March 29, 2011 [3 favorites]


The former.
posted by xil at 10:40 PM on March 29, 2011


FRIST!!
posted by Bron-Y-Aur at 10:42 PM on March 29, 2011 [2 favorites]


Look closely, you'll see Metafilter has types of FIRST comments. They're just as immature, 'cept when made by me.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 10:43 PM on March 29, 2011 [7 favorites]


Firsties are so annoying on the AV Club. i'm guessing the $5 thing kills them. wonder if the Something Awful forums are also first-less
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 10:43 PM on March 29, 2011 [2 favorites]


Is there any info on who actually started the FIRST thing? Any particular sight that popularized it? It really has to go down as one of the dumbest customs I can imagine: purposeless and annoying.
posted by philip-random at 10:43 PM on March 29, 2011 [4 favorites]


SEVEN! (Is this like the numerical version of an alphabet thread?)
posted by Phire at 10:44 PM on March 29, 2011


Seeing a "First!" in the wild on MetaFilter is rarity. Word on the street is that if you spot one and can get a screenshot before it's deleted, you can trade it in for favorites.
posted by amyms at 10:46 PM on March 29, 2011 [21 favorites]


Every once in a while there will be a post made in the wee hours that flounders, comment-less, for a good half an hour and I'm just hovering there, waiting for someone else to go first and "set the tone" so that I don't have to.
posted by Mizu at 10:48 PM on March 29, 2011 [2 favorites]


DURST POST!
posted by mintcake! at 10:50 PM on March 29, 2011 [2 favorites]


You just did this to provide us all with the joy of saying

FIRST!
posted by desuetude at 10:51 PM on March 29, 2011 [2 favorites]


TRYST! in the bushes over there
posted by tracicle at 10:58 PM on March 29, 2011 [4 favorites]


Diane von Fürstenberg.
posted by pracowity at 11:04 PM on March 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


i don't mind the really clever stealth firsts on the AV Club. but they have to be super, super super clever
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 11:05 PM on March 29, 2011


Firsts!
posted by Scattercat at 11:08 PM on March 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


Jesus, how childish. We don't do "first!" here.
------------------------------------------------------------------
MAXWELTON      |  "There you go again." - Saint Reagan   |  NEVAR
Makin' copies  |  Click here for my monster truck build  |  FORGET
------------------------------------------------------------------
posted by maxwelton at 11:10 PM on March 29, 2011 [36 favorites]


FIR POST!!
posted by trip and a half at 11:10 PM on March 29, 2011


First Night
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 11:17 PM on March 29, 2011


FROST! (Also: Liberace and the Trinidad Tripoli Steel Band doing Handel.)
posted by maudlin at 11:29 PM on March 29, 2011


Look at all these chumps piping in with firsts. You should know that there is a direct 1.00 correlation between time of FPP to first comment to the sexual stamina of said first commenter. Sorry rob.
posted by Mister Fabulous at 11:49 PM on March 29, 2011


LAST!!!
posted by Meatbomb at 11:53 PM on March 29, 2011


Not sure how to feel about this one.
posted by First Post at 11:57 PM on March 29, 2011 [11 favorites]


●████▅▅▄▄▄▄▄▄... ..▄▄▄ {¦(¦====¦>
▄▄▅█ First Tank █▅▄▃▂
███████████████████►
◥☼▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲☼◤
posted by killdevil at 11:58 PM on March 29, 2011 [74 favorites]


The better question is whether you expected this thread to turn into anything else than this
posted by flatluigi at 12:01 AM on March 30, 2011 [6 favorites]


Worst. First. Post. Ever.

because Simpsons references are what we do. and that's where I'm a Viking.
posted by oneswellfoop at 12:12 AM on March 30, 2011 [5 favorites]


Fifth Third Bank.
posted by tangerine at 12:13 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


It doesn't happen much. But I have seen it in posts that are obviously going to be deleted or have been deleted.
posted by deborah at 12:18 AM on March 30, 2011


Oh, and first bunny!

(\(\
( - -)
((') (')
posted by deborah at 12:19 AM on March 30, 2011 [10 favorites]


WURST!
posted by Sys Rq at 12:23 AM on March 30, 2011


thirty FIRST!
posted by From Bklyn at 12:23 AM on March 30, 2011


(o)(o)

First boobs.

Also, FRIST! (Not my favorite person, but nobody's boob.)
posted by gingerest at 12:24 AM on March 30, 2011


site
posted by philip-random at 12:25 AM on March 30, 2011


I clicked but I did not see a monster truck build.

Since this thread is going to the birds here's a video of a baby seal.
posted by hellojed at 12:28 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


Look closely, you'll see Metafilter has types of FIRST comments.

Yeah, they're usually more subtly done, like "Foucault is repeatedly saying this" or "Initial carved into a Kaffir stump."
posted by UbuRoivas at 12:47 AM on March 30, 2011


so anywayF
whats going oni
in this thread yallr
how bout them Orloles?s
LOL k bye talk to you guys latert!
posted by Potomac Avenue at 12:53 AM on March 30, 2011


wonder if the Something Awful forums are also first-less

For years -- years in which pretty clear contempt for its own userbase has resulted in a decline in quality if not numbers -- SA has had a policy of banning people for sport, for lulz, and for an ever-changing array of minute infractions. They have blood-in-the-water banfests where they create artificial ban-metrics, basically to get a revenue-bump, as far as I can tell.

The reason for this is that they allow -- encourage, in fact -- people to pay to re-register or unban themselves.

It's one way of running a community (granted, a community skewed much younger than MeFi), and certainly a lucrative one, but that kind of thing has made it a place I spend next to no time at any more, 11 years after I signed up.

Metafilter, though: I'll never quit you.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 1:02 AM on March 30, 2011 [3 favorites]


Ohhhhh.... I can't quit you, babe.
posted by flabdablet at 1:27 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


somewhere near the beginning!
posted by iamkimiam at 1:31 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


Brandon Blatcher: Look closely, you'll see Metafilter has types of FIRST comments. They're just as immature, 'cept when made by me.

That's very perceptive. I hadn't ever thought to look at it that way, but you're absolutely right. The first one that leaps to mind is in science threads involving some sort of study, very often someone will jump in with "correlation does not imply causation" or a variation of that. It rarely has any bearing on what's being discussed.

I suppose we should try to come up with a list of these.
posted by Kattullus at 2:14 AM on March 30, 2011 [10 favorites]


The bus company here is called First. Always cracks me up, in view of their service. Also: correlation does not imply causation, qed.
posted by Namlit at 2:23 AM on March 30, 2011


Thirst. Definitely thirst.

posted by likeso at 2:58 AM on March 30, 2011


It rarely has any bearing on what's being discussed

That's because... oh, forget it.
posted by fleacircus at 3:27 AM on March 30, 2011 [5 favorites]


NTH!!
posted by Metroid Baby at 4:11 AM on March 30, 2011 [2 favorites]


Hearst Post!
posted by MuffinMan at 4:13 AM on March 30, 2011


First is the worst
Second is the best
Third is the one with a hairy chest.

Weirdly, Yahoo Answers is the first Google result for that rhyme, and people have asked about it dozens of times on there. WTF, Yahoo Answers?
posted by Horace Rumpole at 4:30 AM on March 30, 2011


We don't do it here because we're not total morans.
posted by crunchland at 4:34 AM on March 30, 2011


I suppose we should try to come up with a list of these.

I think if you were strict about matching, the single most common first comment in Metafilter threads would be "Double."
posted by Horace Rumpole at 4:35 AM on March 30, 2011 [3 favorites]


沙发
posted by Abiezer at 4:40 AM on March 30, 2011


You've got a custom stylesheet, and you're just wondering this now?
posted by pompomtom at 4:46 AM on March 30, 2011 [3 favorites]


I reckon the most common first comment will be one trying to answer flippantly whatever question is posed in the FPP.
posted by dhruva at 4:51 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


No reason it's got to be just the one, and not the other.
posted by molecicco at 4:51 AM on March 30, 2011


PENULTIMATE!!
posted by Devils Rancher at 4:54 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


Is there any info on who actually started the FIRST thing?

Of course there is.
posted by backseatpilot at 5:16 AM on March 30, 2011


You've been here long enough to have a pink profile and you have to ask?
posted by John Cohen at 5:20 AM on March 30, 2011


This is a site where we had a whole discussion about being LAST. Which is, of course, a vastly superior achievement.
posted by FishBike at 5:21 AM on March 30, 2011 [2 favorites]


Instead of "FRIST PSOT!!11!" we have a subtler analogue called "threadshifting", where the first few comments on each post are where people compete to move the conversation away from the subject post and towards another topic instead. Getting your threadshift in in the first post can often win the entire thread. Threadshifting as a competitive sport has become the raisin de têtre of many MeFites. This is the most epic threadshift of recent days.

At its basest level, threadshifting can be as simple as declaring that "this thread is now about pie". Another entry-level tactic is to start a debate about the merit of a post - "only one link? Pfft!". If the post is tangentially related to something that everyone enjoys assorting into two teams and having rage-filled arguments about (gender politics, Apple products, cannibalism, guns), the threadshift strategy is simple. The nuclear option of threadshifting, of course, is to say something that might be regarded as insensitive, thereby making the rest of the thread all about you. All these tactics are unsubtle and won't get you many points; it's much better to be subtle, and feign earnestness. The more threads you can turn around without spawning a Meta post, the higher your rank.
posted by nowonmai at 5:26 AM on March 30, 2011 [23 favorites]


John Cohen - what's the significance of a pink profile? I've never seen that till now, but because i signed up for MeFi a grand three days before the OP, i know it isn't just about longevity...
posted by Kololo at 5:30 AM on March 30, 2011


I feel like this place is more like a whack-a-mole; if you stick your head up, regardless of why you did it, someone's going to hit you with a foam mallet.
posted by dflemingecon at 5:32 AM on March 30, 2011


Since this thread is going to the birds here's a video of a baby seal

I'm not even the first seal on this thread. Late to the party as always.
posted by arcticseal at 5:32 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


FishBike writes "This is a site where we had a whole discussion about being LAST. "

Glad yet a little sad to see cortex still hasn't ninjad a last comment in there. For the first few months I loaded that page every day checking.
posted by Mitheral at 5:43 AM on March 30, 2011


Threadshifting as a competitive sport has become the raisin de têtre of many MeFites.

This thread is now about raisins.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 6:03 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


You've been here long enough to have a pink profile and you have to ask?

!!!!!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 6:17 AM on March 30, 2011 [3 favorites]


And Tetris.
posted by dywypi at 6:17 AM on March 30, 2011


Page 2 snypa. Wait, where am I.
posted by Skorgu at 6:19 AM on March 30, 2011


Is there any info on who actually started the FIRST thing?

Yeah, I was the first one to do it.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 6:19 AM on March 30, 2011


No. Heady raisins with extra r
posted by Namlit at 6:21 AM on March 30, 2011


NEITHER FIRST NOR LAST POST!
posted by L'Estrange Fruit at 6:31 AM on March 30, 2011


People really just tend not to do that sort of thing here, but yes we do delete with a vengeance if we see them, which we rarely do.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 6:32 AM on March 30, 2011


antepenult
posted by bleary at 6:33 AM on March 30, 2011


This thread is now about pie.
posted by UbuRoivas at 6:37 AM on March 30, 2011


No it's not, it's about pink profiles. This poster seems to be a usurper.
posted by adamvasco at 6:46 AM on March 30, 2011


not really
posted by adamvasco at 6:48 AM on March 30, 2011


I suppose we should try to come up with a list of these.

These days, most firsties seem to go along the lines of ". . . when the revolution comes"
posted by Think_Long at 6:48 AM on March 30, 2011


This poster seems to be a usurper.

What is the street value of a MeFi profile? It's a <20k profile, too, so that would be even better.
posted by winna at 6:50 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


People really just tend not to do that sort of thing here, but yes we do delete with a vengeance if we see them, which we rarely do.

What she said.

For the first few months I loaded that page every day checking.

I am Jack's fiendish chortle.

!!!!!

Insult to injury: his shade of pink is a lot less retina-searing than yours.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:04 AM on March 30, 2011


Kololo: John Cohen - what's the significance of a pink profile? I've never seen that till now, but because i signed up for MeFi a grand three days before the OP, i know it isn't just about longevity...

It was once possible to edit the CSS on one's profile page. The feature was disabled after some 'sploits were discorvered, but users who already had it in place were able to retain it, provided they never made another change to their profile. Gator has one of the nicer ones remaining.
posted by Rock Steady at 7:05 AM on March 30, 2011 [2 favorites]


Insult to injury: his shade of pink is a lot less retina-searing than yours.

I know, too bad for him!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 7:07 AM on March 30, 2011 [2 favorites]


It's one way of running a community (granted, a community skewed much younger than MeFi), and certainly a lucrative one, but that kind of thing has made it a place I spend next to no time at any more, 11 years after I signed up.

I can understand that, but I enjoy the absurdity of it all. And it's generally very easy for regular non-dumbass users to avoid being banned. It's not for everyone, but I like the fact that they've raised a bunch of money for Japan by having people donate to get one guy banned.
posted by graventy at 7:09 AM on March 30, 2011


FIRST!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:13 AM on March 30, 2011


This. So much this.
posted by Dano St at 7:17 AM on March 30, 2011


seven of nine
posted by francesca too at 7:23 AM on March 30, 2011


We do have in-joke "firsts" that tend to get used in place of FRIST!

I, for one...
Christ, what an...
This will...
posted by Devils Rancher at 7:31 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


I once saw a woman dressed as a combination of Catwoman and Seven of Nine. She had the PVC outfit and the whip and the Borg implants. I couldn't figure it out. Why try to go as both? Pick one, dammit!

So finally, I ask, "What are you supposed to be?"

She says, "Seven of Sixty-Nine."

Yeah, that was worth the price of admission.

What's this thread about again?
posted by cjorgensen at 7:33 AM on March 30, 2011 [4 favorites]


There used to be a very annoying version where someone would post earlier in the thread with ****filter, with **** being some glib one-word description of the post topic. Originally it had been used to imply a topic was being posted too frequently, but then people started pissing in any thread this way. Someone did it to my first FPP (the offending comment was deleted years later in a moderation sweep) and it put me off posting for quite a while.

Now I'm not prolific because most of the cool things I find are doubles or I don't have time to do a topic justice, but there was a while when I felt like as a new poster, all I was doing by posting was inviting some asshole to make a display of how I wasn't worth listening to. That's kind of what the FIRST!!! thing is about too - It's saying: "The only value your speech has is to give me a chance to drown you out."
posted by Karmakaze at 7:50 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


LAST!
posted by quin at 7:54 AM on March 30, 2011


Last.
posted by strixus at 7:54 AM on March 30, 2011


No... wait!

LAST!
posted by quin at 7:54 AM on March 30, 2011


THIS TIME FOR SURE!

LAST!
posted by quin at 7:55 AM on March 30, 2011


No, I'm last!
posted by strixus at 7:55 AM on March 30, 2011


*gives up*
posted by quin at 7:55 AM on March 30, 2011


I WIN!

Last!
posted by strixus at 7:55 AM on March 30, 2011


Someone did it to my first FPP (the offending comment was deleted years later in a moderation sweep) and it put me off posting for quite a while.

I'm guessing you're thinking of this comment (or another "iraqfilter" one above it), which indeed is nowhere to be found in your first post because it was in your second post.

The circumstances under which we will go and delete an old comment from an old thread are rare and generally more involved than just "someone was being mildly obnoxious". There aren't really belated mod-sweeps of that sort. I wouldn't have gone looking except I was trying to imagine what sort of weird circumstances would have led to such a comment being a problem.

In any case, yeah, that's definitely one of the obnoxious things people did, so I hear you there.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:02 AM on March 30, 2011


Penultimate!
posted by JoanArkham at 8:04 AM on March 30, 2011 [2 favorites]


Instead of "FRIST PSOT!!11!" we have a subtler analogue called "threadshifting""threadshitting"

FTFY.
posted by Mister Fabulous at 8:07 AM on March 30, 2011


Actually it was that someone had hit the post about women being abused during gyno exams with a one word "quimfilter" comment. The comment is gone, now, so I assumed a mod got it eventually.
posted by Karmakaze at 8:15 AM on March 30, 2011


FURST!
posted by Faint of Butt at 8:22 AM on March 30, 2011


raisin pie
posted by annsunny at 8:28 AM on March 30, 2011


Oh hmm! If it was deleted more or less at-the-time it's possible that was back before comment deletions on the blue were hidden rather than nuked. In which case my analysis is wholly spurious, so never mind me.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:30 AM on March 30, 2011


First instance of me.
posted by The Whelk at 8:31 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


FIST!

no, i'm not linking that to anything
posted by FAMOUS MONSTER at 8:40 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


PORTMAN GRITS
(100 get?)
posted by cavalier at 8:46 AM on March 30, 2011


I'm going to go ahead and close this now...
posted by fixedgear at 8:49 AM on March 30, 2011


Ad hominem grits, with butter!
posted by ApathyGirl at 8:50 AM on March 30, 2011


This comment is somewhere near the beginning, middle, or end of this thread. Time will tell.
posted by rtha at 8:58 AM on March 30, 2011


If you have are posting from a smartphone and/or can't be arsed to capitalize the first letter of each sentence, please don't post the first comment in a thread. It looks terrible when someone busts out some short reactionary nonsense in all lower case as the first comment in a thread. I'd rather see "First!" than most of those.
posted by Burhanistan at 9:03 AM on March 30, 2011


The first comment in this thread really should have been:

Confirmation Bias!
posted by ORthey at 9:06 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


FIRST!!!

oh... crap
posted by Drasher at 9:09 AM on March 30, 2011


FIRST OF THE LAST
posted by The Whelk at 9:10 AM on March 30, 2011


BEST! :D
posted by Lynsey at 9:17 AM on March 30, 2011


Surely this...

will be the last
posted by Devils Rancher at 9:32 AM on March 30, 2011


I'm late, as usual.
posted by never used baby shoes at 9:38 AM on March 30, 2011


First-type posts always show up in soon to be deleted threads. There seems to be a group of posters that recall everything posted in the past 10 years and hyperlink to it with "double".
posted by pickinganameismuchharderthanihadanticipated at 9:39 AM on March 30, 2011


We do "Meh" instead.
posted by Artw at 9:43 AM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


John Cohen - what's the significance of a pink profile? I've never seen that till now, but because i signed up for MeFi a grand three days before the OP, i know it isn't just about longevity...

Well, it is about longevity. You used to (circa 2004?) be able to customize your profile with different colors. I don't know how many people did this or even knew about it. But it was possible, and then it stopped being possible. So when you see a profile like 31d1's of ThePinkSuperhero's, you know they customized it back in the old days and kept it that way.
posted by John Cohen at 9:55 AM on March 30, 2011


I suppose we should try to come up with a list of these.

I nominate 'News at 11' comments.
posted by shakespeherian at 10:17 AM on March 30, 2011


We do "Meh" instead.

Also, "Eponysterical."
posted by L'Estrange Fruit at 10:21 AM on March 30, 2011


To answer your question:

1) Very, very, *very* rarely, most often by total n00bs, which the mods then delete (the comment, not the n00bs);

2) On any post that regular readers can tell is definitely going to be deleted, so we get to be silly;

3) As a pun on something relevant;

4) Ironically.

So, the short answer is "No. MetaFilter is not like other discussion sites on the Internet."
posted by tzikeh at 10:23 AM on March 30, 2011


I don't post first, but I do post most.

MOSTEST POSTEST
posted by Mister_A at 10:53 AM on March 30, 2011




I don't know where I am!
posted by dirigibleman at 11:15 AM on March 30, 2011


Someone, way earlier asked:
"Is there any info on who actually started the FIRST thing?"

The best answer I can find and that I know of from my own personal experience is in Usenet, where the troll brigade would pop into random topic threads and just post "First" to bump up their commenting status on whatever server they were logged to. It wasn't very widespread, but I seem to recall a big schism between the usenet admins about whether or not to even bother with it.

Later, it became a very popular thing on Slashdot to do it. It got so bad that at one point, I don't think anyone actually read the articles and was just there hitting "refresh" and trying to be "First" on any new posts.

Though, this is just from my own cursory remembering and absolutely no research. I'm probably completely wrong.
posted by daq at 11:49 AM on March 30, 2011




ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY-FIFTH!
posted by briank at 12:52 PM on March 30, 2011



Is there any info on who actually started the FIRST thing? Any particular sight that popularized it? It really has to go down as one of the dumbest customs I can imagine: purposeless and annoying.


I imagine some AOL message board back in the 1990s. It was a big thing on one of the ones I frequented.
posted by jgirl at 12:56 PM on March 30, 2011


<HEISENBURGER>
posted by scrump at 1:10 PM on March 30, 2011 [2 favorites]


So is anyone else gonna wait a month and try to get the last post?
posted by The Devil Tesla at 1:54 PM on March 30, 2011


Is there any info on who actually started the FIRST thing? Any particular sight that popularized it?

Pretty sure it originated, or at least became a big deal, on Slashdot. You could get away with it there since the worst thing that would happen is you'd get moderated down to invisibility, losing a few points of karma in the process. No big deal really.

Threads there don't seem to get as many comments as they used to, but it used to be fairly common to see a thread with five or six attempts at "FIRST POST" at the top, all within a second or two of each other.

They actually made a sort of attempt to monetize it, by allowing subscribers to post early ... so essentially the only way you'd get a FP (or, more charitably, be able to influence the direction of discussion by getting a really insightful post in early) was if you subscribed. I think that cut back on it a bit since most people who tried for FPs were trolls, and most trolls weren't going to shell out a few bucks for each account.
posted by Kadin2048 at 2:29 PM on March 30, 2011


Kadin2048 writes "You could get away with it there since the worst thing that would happen is you'd get moderated down to invisibility, losing a few points of karma in the process. No big deal really."

First post wankery predated moderation/karma on /.
posted by Mitheral at 2:39 PM on March 30, 2011


What is the street value of a MeFi profile? It's a <20k profile, too, so that would be even better.
Well if a common-as-dirt <20k profile is worth money, the hard-won 14k profiles must be priceless. You can't buy my profile with gold, but my heart is up for hire ...
posted by dg at 3:18 PM on March 30, 2011


Terse.
posted by maryr at 3:30 PM on March 30, 2011


Blast First
posted by box at 3:34 PM on March 30, 2011


wonder if the Something Awful forums are also first-less

Never seen it there, but they also have some pretty heavy moderation.
posted by reductiondesign at 3:46 PM on March 30, 2011


dg writes "Well if a common-as-dirt <20k profile is worth money, the hard-won 14k profiles must be priceless. You can't buy my profile with gold, but my heart is up for hire ..."

If someone wants my pre $5 noob account I'll gladly accept its number in ounces of pure gold. Heck I'll even throw in the gmail account that goes with it. Not quite as prestigious as dg's but not quite priceless.
posted by Mitheral at 4:16 PM on March 30, 2011


it's pretty annoying at the AV Club. it's spawned anti-firsters and First Post parodies and all sorts of wank
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 4:19 PM on March 30, 2011


               .-_|\
              /     \
      FIRST ->*.--._/
                   v 
posted by The corpse in the library at 5:04 PM on March 30, 2011


Is that Perth? What is that?
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 5:58 PM on March 30, 2011 [2 favorites]


It's a bunny's butt.
posted by Burhanistan at 6:16 PM on March 30, 2011 [5 favorites]


The pink profiles don't work in Firefox and every once in a while I forget, and look at TPS's profile and start to panic a little.
posted by IndigoRain at 6:17 PM on March 30, 2011


Could be a reference to the Australia First party, which is easily mistaken for rabbit anus.
posted by Sparx at 6:19 PM on March 30, 2011 [4 favorites]


I am here to post in this epic thread.
posted by TheBones at 6:25 PM on March 30, 2011


ONE HUNDRED FORTY THIRD
posted by slogger at 6:57 PM on March 30, 2011


Is that Perth? What is that?
It's the right location, but I think there are far more suitable candidates for the 'arsehole of Australia' tag.
posted by dg at 7:01 PM on March 30, 2011


The pink profiles don't work in Firefox and every once in a while I forget, and look at TPS's profile and start to panic a little.

Wait, what? They work in my Firefox. Ahem. If you know what I'm saying.
posted by Go Banana at 7:19 PM on March 30, 2011


I also see pink profiles in Firefox.
posted by dg at 8:03 PM on March 30, 2011


I sure hope the alligator profiles work in Firefox.
posted by Gator at 8:23 PM on March 30, 2011


It's the right location, but I think there are far more suitable candidates for the 'arsehole of Australia' tag.

my callout is the next thread over, thank you.

i was thinking First Fleet but wasn't that on the other side?
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 8:29 PM on March 30, 2011


MetaFilter: the arsehole of Australia
posted by scrump at 8:33 PM on March 30, 2011 [1 favorite]


I think it's the "Better Contrast" Stylish script I use that makes it not appear pink. I've been using it so long I forget about it.

*turns script off*

UGH, why is MeTa this too-light shade of gray.... oh, oh wait, it's supposed to be like that.

Yep, there's her pink profile.

*turns script back on* Ahhhh, that's better. In conclusion, it's the Stylish script.
posted by IndigoRain at 9:36 PM on March 30, 2011


PENULTIMATE!
posted by TheNewWazoo at 12:05 AM on March 31, 2011


ANTIPENULTIMATE!
(for all the RSS readers in the house!)
posted by iamkimiam at 1:44 AM on March 31, 2011 [1 favorite]


Why do you hate the penultimate?

(for all the pedants in the house, who still respect the prefix ante-)
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:04 AM on March 31, 2011 [3 favorites]


Heh - I always enjoy reading the pompous, barely literate descriptions that real estate agents write about properties for sale. Quite a common one is "offering the penultimate in exclusive designer living..." as if it somehow means the mega-awesome better-than-ultimate!1!!
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:07 AM on March 31, 2011


What is the street value of a MeFi profile?

$20. SAIT.



[ducks]
posted by arcticseal at 4:33 AM on March 31, 2011


$20?!?? Are you fuckin' kidding me?!?? This profile's cut with YouTube comments!
posted by UbuRoivas at 5:43 AM on March 31, 2011 [1 favorite]


iamkimiam = penultimate-ist.
posted by maryr at 9:39 AM on March 31, 2011


So... there are no pictures of anyone's cats in this thread?
posted by J. Wilson at 10:02 AM on March 31, 2011


Firs! Oops. Fist! Damn. Fits! SHIT! Frist! SONOFAGODDAMNEDBITCH!!!


First. I must learn to type. Then I can be first.
posted by Debaser626 at 10:17 AM on March 31, 2011


Here is one of my cats.
posted by rtha at 10:36 AM on March 31, 2011 [3 favorites]


Here isn't one of my cats.
posted by owtytrof at 2:33 PM on March 31, 2011 [4 favorites]


I can't believe nobody has mentioned how Fark eliminated their first-post problem. They had a filter that automatically replaced the words "first post" in any comment with the word "boobies". Obviously that fits a lot better with Fark than it does with MetaFilter, but I stll get a kick out of it.
posted by ErWenn at 8:50 PM on March 31, 2011 [1 favorite]


The penultimate is not the enemy of the first!


The first one that leaps to mind is in science threads involving some sort of study, very often someone will jump in with "correlation does not imply causation" or a variation of that.

SCIENCE!
posted by Kirth Gerson at 6:18 AM on April 1, 2011


Absence of proof is not proof of absence!
posted by maryr at 8:38 AM on April 1, 2011 [1 favorite]


Yeah, and corn on the cob!

Exclamation mark!
posted by From Bklyn at 8:45 AM on April 1, 2011


Proof of purchase!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:21 PM on April 2, 2011


One size fits all!
posted by flabdablet at 1:54 AM on April 3, 2011


Now 23% better!
posted by flabdablet at 1:54 AM on April 3, 2011


If you have are posting from a smartphone and/or can't be arsed to capitalize the first letter of each sentence, please don't post the first comment in a thread. It looks terrible when someone busts out some short reactionary nonsense in all lower case as the first comment in a thread. I'd rather see "First!" than most of those.

Is this about me?
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 6:44 AM on April 3, 2011


lowercase in brooklyn
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:16 AM on April 3, 2011


brooklowercaseyn
posted by From Bklyn at 12:38 AM on April 4, 2011


> Is this about me?

Uh, it is if you would like it to be so.
posted by Burhanistan at 8:10 AM on April 4, 2011


lastcomment!
posted by iamkimiam at 11:03 AM on April 7, 2011


The hell you say.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:03 AM on April 7, 2011


grrrrrrrrr.
posted by iamkimiam at 11:05 AM on April 7, 2011


Weeks to go still.
posted by Mitheral at 3:30 PM on April 7, 2011


Weeks to go before the thread sleeps.
posted by amyms at 10:20 PM on April 7, 2011


Last!
posted by Kattullus at 11:05 PM on April 7, 2011


Not even close.
posted by arcticseal at 1:39 AM on April 8, 2011


Amateurs
posted by Namlit at 3:23 AM on April 8, 2011


Why am I awake?
posted by The Whelk at 4:03 AM on April 8, 2011


You're one of those short sleepers aren't you.
posted by arcticseal at 5:45 AM on April 8, 2011


No I am the emperor of the duvet.
posted by The Whelk at 5:46 AM on April 8, 2011


I am the king of the divan.
posted by flabdablet at 7:10 PM on April 8, 2011


Ca plane pour moi.

... moi moi moi moi moi moi moi...
posted by maryr at 8:15 PM on April 8, 2011


the fact that the French Tourism Board hasn't used that song is a sad sign indeed

(er, maybe cause it's actually Belgian...)

But can;t you see a speeded up film of an American couple doing all kinds of French things set to the song? With a quick "VISIT PARIS" tag on the end? I'd go for it.


(then again the pro-America Tourism ads in the UK were pretty slick, Spiderman and Mary Jane against a huge backdrop of Manhattan: YOU'VE SEEN THE MOVIE. NOW VISIT THE SET. I was impressed.)
posted by The Whelk at 8:48 PM on April 8, 2011


Heck, Belgium could use some tourist PR; if they ran one ad with that and another with this, I might go so far as eat a french-fried Brussels sprout waffle in a poppy field.
posted by Sys Rq at 7:10 AM on April 9, 2011


earliest ..yawn ..stretch
posted by Namlit at 12:04 AM on April 11, 2011


So is anyone else gonna wait a month and try to get the last post?
Maybe. See you tomorrow.
posted by unliteral at 9:07 PM on April 28, 2011


LAST
posted by The Whelk at 9:16 PM on April 28, 2011


pfft
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:43 PM on April 28, 2011


faaaaart
posted by The Whelk at 9:44 PM on April 28, 2011


i'd imagine going for the last post was a lot easier when recent activity wasn't implemented
posted by flatluigi at 10:05 PM on April 28, 2011


dribble
wipe

posted by flabdablet at 10:05 PM on April 28, 2011


I'm just here for the free shot.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:07 PM on April 28, 2011


Quite near the final comment.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:07 PM on April 28, 2011


Set em up
▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞▞
posted by flabdablet at 10:10 PM on April 28, 2011


Foo.
▞▞▞▞
▞▞▞▞
▞▞▞▞
▞▞▞▞
posted by flabdablet at 10:11 PM on April 28, 2011


▞▞▞▞
▞▞▞▞
▞▞▞▞
▞▞▞▞

posted by flabdablet at 10:12 PM on April 28, 2011


We're like a bunch of shipwrecked sailors.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:19 PM on April 28, 2011


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 ▗▚▜▞▞▙▖▌▛▞▀█▄▗█ ▙ ▙▝▀▐▞ ▌▘▙ ▌▀▀▄▀█▐▚▜▐▟▞                         ▐▞▙▜▟▐▟▝▜▙▚▜▐▙▛█▙▛▛▜▙▜▞▙▙▜▞▛▟▐▚▌▛▙▚▜▞▙▜▞▛▌▛▟▐▜▞▛▞▞▌▙▜▐▞▌▙▜▞▟▞▌▛▙▜▟▝▀▀▙▙█▞▙█▞▙▜▙▜▌▛█▟▜▞▙▌▛▙▜▟▌█▐▌▛█▐▙▜▟▜▞▙▜▌▛▛▙▜▜▜▟▞▛▙▙▐ ▌▞▖▌▚ ▌▚▄▐▐▐▜▐▜▀▀▀▀▝▀▘▚ ▖  ▗ ▖▖▄▐▐▄▐▖▌▌▀▀▀▖▌▞▟▐▐▐▖▚▐▐▐▐▚▜▚▀▌▌▌▘▘▘▘▘▘▘▝▖▗ ▖▗ ▖▝ 
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▝ ▌▙▀▌▌▙   ▝▜▟▜█▜█▗▘▌▚▖▌▌▚▘▌▌▌▌▞▞▄▝▌▛▞▙▌▙   ▗ ▖▄▄▟▄▟▐▛▜▛▀▀▀▌ ▘▗▗▗▖▘▌▌▘▌▞▝▞▞█▝▞▛█▙▙▌█▞▛█▞▙▌▛▙▜▞▌▙▙▜▐▟▐▚▌▙▜▟▐▜▐▜▞▙▜▐▞▙▌▙▜▞▟▐▜▞▙▜▐▞▟▞▙▌▙▜▟▜█▜▙▙▄▚▝▌▐█▞▛█▟▜▟▐▌▙▙▜▟▐▌█▞▛█▐▌█▞▛▙▌█▐▜▞▛█▐▟▐▙▜▞█▟▄▄▐▐▐▚▀▛▜▐▐▐▝▝▝▝ ▘▘▝ ▗ ▖▗ ▗  ▖ ▌▝▖▄▗▄▄▗▄▗▖▚▝▐▝▝▐▝▚▝▐ ▌▖▖▌▖▚▖▙▐▖▙▞▟▟▜▟▟▟▟▙▙▜▙▜▜▜▜
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posted by flabdablet at 10:22 PM on April 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Aaaaaaaah.
posted by flabdablet at 10:22 PM on April 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


FOR GLORY
posted by The Whelk at 10:24 PM on April 28, 2011


For shame!
posted by Burhanistan at 10:25 PM on April 28, 2011


We're like a bunch of shipwrecked sailors.

Rum, Bum, and Concertina?

Wait let me find some rum.
posted by The Whelk at 10:25 PM on April 28, 2011


This is not the last comment.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:28 PM on April 28, 2011


this is the monster at the end of the thread.
posted by The Whelk at 10:30 PM on April 28, 2011


This is the first comment of the rest of your life.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:30 PM on April 28, 2011


MONSTER!
posted by The Whelk at 10:30 PM on April 28, 2011


I've been all over the world, but I keep coming back to the bathroom.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:31 PM on April 28, 2011


I think we've got to go deeper
posted by The Whelk at 10:34 PM on April 28, 2011


Bloody Nora! Shouldn't have opened me trap.
posted by unliteral at 10:38 PM on April 28, 2011


DEEP DEEP DOWN
posted by The Whelk at 10:39 PM on April 28, 2011


Maybe tomorrow night?
posted by Burhanistan at 10:40 PM on April 28, 2011


GONNA DRIVE IN MY CAR
posted by The Whelk at 10:41 PM on April 28, 2011


vrooooooommmmmmmm
posted by arcticseal at 11:16 PM on April 28, 2011


Does anyone read the posts down here?
posted by dg at 5:17 AM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


Yesterday the 4chan concept of "get" was explained to me and the epic tale of the 10 million get.

...and here we are.
posted by Kattullus at 5:18 AM on April 29, 2011


I would also like to hear the story of the 10 million get, but in a different thread because this is the LAST POST.
posted by Meatbomb at 5:35 AM on April 29, 2011


Curse Sir Walter Raleigh, he was such a stupid get.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 5:55 AM on April 29, 2011


hahaha, and you thought you were alone in here. We shall fight to the end, my friend.
posted by iamkimiam at 7:22 AM on April 29, 2011


the only end, my friend.
posted by The Whelk at 7:25 AM on April 29, 2011


How ironic that my FIRST post in this thread should turn out to be the thread's LAST.
posted by COBRA! at 7:27 AM on April 29, 2011


If only that were so.
posted by arcticseal at 7:31 AM on April 29, 2011


SALT!

Wait... I think I'm doing this wrong.
posted by quin at 7:39 AM on April 29, 2011


Jumping jacks in the cell
posted by The Whelk at 7:43 AM on April 29, 2011


Quit stepping on my foot.
posted by The corpse in the library at 7:50 AM on April 29, 2011


Maybe it's different from where all you fucking cretins come from, but in civilized society it is RUDE to post after I have said "LAST POST".

So could everybody just STFU and go diddle your mothers or something? I am lasting this post here and now.
posted by Meatbomb at 7:51 AM on April 29, 2011


Sorry, did you say something?
posted by The corpse in the library at 7:52 AM on April 29, 2011


Yes, "The corpse in the library" (if that's even your real name), I did say something.

I gave you some specific instructions:

1) STFU (that is an acronym and it stands for "shut the fuck up".

2) GO diddle your mother.

It seems like you are having some difficulty following simple instructions but I am a patient man and I will give you one more chance. This comment is the LAST ONE IN THIS THREAD. What that means is that you should not make any more comments here - if you do it will FUCK THINGS UP. And I know you don't want to be seen as a fuckup, a spoiler, a failure, right?

Come on, now, I know that if we just all pull together as a team and demonstrate some unit cohesion and discipline we can make this happen!

Don't let me down team, let's DO THIS THING!
posted by Meatbomb at 8:00 AM on April 29, 2011


I hear no bugle.
posted by arcticseal at 8:00 AM on April 29, 2011


See, arcticseal, that's another example of what I was just talking about. That thing that I was asking y'all not to do.
posted by Meatbomb at 8:02 AM on April 29, 2011


Aren't we supposed to hear some lady sing before it's over?
posted by never used baby shoes at 8:04 AM on April 29, 2011


LALALALALA

OK, that is the fat lady singing.

Now that we have taken care of that minor technicality can we please get with the fucking programme of "stop posting in the thread so Meatbomb can be last"?
posted by Meatbomb at 8:10 AM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


OK, that is the fat lady singing.

Look, did you want me to diddle your mother or not?
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:14 AM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


Oh, snap.
posted by never used baby shoes at 8:17 AM on April 29, 2011


oh hai whats going on
posted by rtha at 8:21 AM on April 29, 2011


BEGIN NON-BLONDES SEQUENCE
posted by The Whelk at 8:23 AM on April 29, 2011


I love Recent Activity.
posted by Rock Steady at 8:28 AM on April 29, 2011


Wait, are you guys waiting for the fat lady to sing? Let me oblige.
posted by Kattullus at 8:33 AM on April 29, 2011


Let's read a book to put this thread to bed.
posted by never used baby shoes at 8:49 AM on April 29, 2011


You people are incorrigible. I suppose you think this is all some big joke, don't you?
posted by Meatbomb at 9:10 AM on April 29, 2011


EVERYONE STOP POSTING SO MEATBOMB CAN BE LAST

EVERYONE KNOWS THE LAST IS BEST

except for in parades, where it means you're the one with the shovel
posted by The corpse in the library at 9:11 AM on April 29, 2011


[this space held for Meatbomb]
posted by quin at 9:17 AM on April 29, 2011


Meatbomb can stake his claim to the last spot just like anyone else, by attempting to get the last comment into the database before it closes the thread, at which point cortext will use his special mod-powers to add a final comment, pwning us all with his 1337 5|<!11z0|z.
posted by Kattullus at 9:44 AM on April 29, 2011


I am here.

but i am not meatbomb
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:44 AM on April 29, 2011




Does the mefite who gets the last comment get pie or something? Because that would be cool.
posted by rtha at 10:03 AM on April 29, 2011


             (
              )
         __..---..__
     ,-='  /  |  \  `=-.
    :--..___________..--;
     \.,_____________,./  
posted by The Whelk at 10:06 AM on April 29, 2011


Nah, just bragging rights.

Delicious cherry filled bragging rights in a flaky brown crust, served in a pan, with whipped cream on top.

Totally different.
posted by quin at 10:07 AM on April 29, 2011


Basically what happens is I go from house to house stealing your pies while you're distracted by threadwatching. It's one of those weird European Santa Claus situations.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:15 AM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


That's why you always leave a "Mod pie" cooling on the window sill on Arbor Day.


What the pie is made of depends on your personal relationship with the Mod in question.
posted by The Whelk at 10:21 AM on April 29, 2011


Is this where I swoop in at the last minute and steal the prize?

SWOOOooooooOOOOP
posted by Think_Long at 10:23 AM on April 29, 2011


*grabs the pie and runs*
posted by The corpse in the library at 10:29 AM on April 29, 2011


we all know the one who fell swoops
posted by The Whelk at 10:29 AM on April 29, 2011


*trips, sends pie flying*
posted by The corpse in the library at 10:30 AM on April 29, 2011


*watches sadly as the pie hits cortex*
posted by The corpse in the library at 10:30 AM on April 29, 2011


Will you be writing that check to the orphans now sir?
posted by The Whelk at 10:34 AM on April 29, 2011


first
posted by shakespeherian at 10:34 AM on April 29, 2011


first
posted by Think_Long at 10:38 AM on April 29, 2011


No, you were 259th and 260th respectively.
posted by quin at 10:40 AM on April 29, 2011


Just keep dissecting that frog.
posted by The Whelk at 10:41 AM on April 29, 2011


First to write this particular comment!
posted by shakespeherian at 10:43 AM on April 29, 2011


seriously, this frog isn't going to dissect itself.

Or ....will it?
posted by The Whelk at 10:44 AM on April 29, 2011


I'm... not sure what you're talking about.
posted by shakespeherian at 10:54 AM on April 29, 2011


I could pretent that I understand, but I really really don't.

FIRST
posted by Think_Long at 10:56 AM on April 29, 2011


pretent -- it's like when you're camping, but you're not yet.
posted by Think_Long at 10:57 AM on April 29, 2011


Here comes the magic!
posted by SpiffyRob at 10:58 AM on April 29, 2011


Yes.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:59 AM on April 29, 2011


I'm rooting for you Meatbomb.
posted by quin at 11:00 AM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


MEATBOMB!
MEATBOMB!
MEATBOMB!
posted by The Whelk at 11:01 AM on April 29, 2011


I don't even want the last post, I just like screwing around in old threads.
posted by shakespeherian at 11:01 AM on April 29, 2011


Yeah, but we're here for Meatbomb. We're really hoping he can pull this one out.
posted by quin at 11:02 AM on April 29, 2011


Posting after me is not rooting for me at all, it is FUCKING ME IN THE ASS. Look, quin: this is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass.
posted by Meatbomb at 11:03 AM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


Where is he, anyway?
posted by shakespeherian at 11:03 AM on April 29, 2011


On non-preview: Oh there he is.
posted by shakespeherian at 11:03 AM on April 29, 2011


BEHIND YOU!
posted by The Whelk at 11:04 AM on April 29, 2011


Crap! I hope he has a chance to come back and get that last comment in. I'd hate to think we messed this up for him.
posted by quin at 11:04 AM on April 29, 2011


THE MEATBOMB IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE!
posted by The Whelk at 11:04 AM on April 29, 2011


I could have worded that better
posted by The Whelk at 11:04 AM on April 29, 2011 [2 favorites]


I've got your Meatbomb right here, buddy. When does this clock timeout anyways?
posted by Meatbomb at 11:05 AM on April 29, 2011


Probably any second now...

first
March 30, 2011 12:31 AM


Or maybe in like 12 hours. We should keep this up until then, just to make sure you get it.
posted by quin at 11:14 AM on April 29, 2011


Meatbomb, Meatbomb he's our man;
If he can't last post, no one can!
posted by never used baby shoes at 11:14 AM on April 29, 2011


I am paying cortex twenty bucks to close this thread up right... after... I post... this... comment now do it now now!
posted by backseatpilot at 11:15 AM on April 29, 2011


By definition, this will be considered the canonical last post in the thread regardless of any further dribbling and scribbling by this mass of cretins gathered around me. I win, and good day to you all.
posted by Meatbomb at 11:25 AM on April 29, 2011


*cheers*

HE WON! HE WON! HE WON!

See! I knew you could do it!
posted by quin at 11:27 AM on April 29, 2011 [2 favorites]


This will be considered the canonical last post in this thread and across the MeFi spectrum. Goodnight Ask and MetaTalk, I have just completed you. Goodnight MefiMusic, where I almost never go but apparently there is a lot of stuff posted every day. Goodnight IRL, I hardly had a chance to know you.
posted by Think_Long at 11:35 AM on April 29, 2011


Metafilter: Mass of cretins gathered around Meatbomb.

Congrats!
posted by never used baby shoes at 11:35 AM on April 29, 2011


Hi.
posted by Sys Rq at 11:48 AM on April 29, 2011


I want the last bit of pie. WANT.
posted by Namlit at 11:53 AM on April 29, 2011


You'll get a pie in the sky when you die.
posted by The Whelk at 11:58 AM on April 29, 2011


I want pie now.
posted by rjs at 12:13 PM on April 29, 2011


****************
CABAL HISTORICAL MARKER
****************
This marker commemorates the timespacedata location of what is now considered to be the last comment ever posted in the history of the vast collection of multiplanar information and entertainment entities known collectively as the MultiFilter. Due to the devastating temporal distortions caused by the Second, Third and Zeroth Time Wars, any posts, comments, answers, songs, films, data constructs, or emotions added to the MultiFilter database (known in Prime-like universes simply as MetaFilter) actually occurred before this exact comment. Vast pilgrimages will be made to the location of this comment, and it will be remembered until the end of the Universe as...
****************
THE LAST COMMENT. THERE WAS NO CABAL.
****************
posted by Rock Steady at 12:30 PM on April 29, 2011


Wiener.
posted by shakespeherian at 12:43 PM on April 29, 2011


Was that whooshing sound the cabal singularity?
posted by rtha at 1:28 PM on April 29, 2011


Track: That Whooshing Sound
Artist: The Cabal Singularity
Label: {REDACTED}
posted by Think_Long at 1:55 PM on April 29, 2011


I kinda wish we could make it so that the last post goes to someone who wasn't trying for it.
posted by ErWenn at 2:06 PM on April 29, 2011


If you zoom out to 10% on flabdablet's mega comment, it kind of looks like the shroud of Turin oriented with the face on the left side
posted by Think_Long at 2:08 PM on April 29, 2011


The Whelk: BEHIND YOU!

That reminds me... I keep going back and forth on what I should have as the inscription on my headstone, but the one I keep coming back to is:

HERE LIES
KÁRI TULINIUS
1981-2139
LOOK OUT
HE'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU!


So what are you guys gonna put on your gravestones?
posted by Kattullus at 4:13 PM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


Nuthin'. I'm gonna be freeze-dried.
posted by likeso at 4:27 PM on April 29, 2011


I'm going to be baked into a delicious meatloaf.
posted by Sys Rq at 4:33 PM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


I'm not trying!

Well, not very hard at least.
posted by iamkimiam at 4:50 PM on April 29, 2011


I'm going to get baked and dive into a delicious meatloaf.
posted by gman at 5:00 PM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


Hi, I'm back after a nice refreshing sleep. Any pie left for breakfast?
posted by arcticseal at 5:04 PM on April 29, 2011


Huh. First time I've heard Michael Lee Aday referred to as "delicious". But I don't get out much.
posted by likeso at 5:05 PM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


How did I go my whole life and not know his real name? I think you just need a nice steak sauce.
posted by arcticseal at 5:08 PM on April 29, 2011


I'm torn between getting a huge ornate gravestone in the French Manner or just becoming a tree.


Maybe both. Spread out over an orchard. Little brass signs nailed to the trees.

"THESE APPLES PROVIDED BY MY ROTTING CORPSE."
posted by The Whelk at 5:24 PM on April 29, 2011 [3 favorites]


I thought second was the best. Doesn't that mean orthogonality already won?
posted by maryr at 5:25 PM on April 29, 2011


Well, certainly two out of three ain't bad.
posted by Kattullus at 5:28 PM on April 29, 2011


I see what you did there.
posted by likeso at 5:41 PM on April 29, 2011


My tame fire ants will float me to the end of this thread.
posted by arcticseal at 5:54 PM on April 29, 2011


The expression should be "easy as cobbler," as I find pie crusts to be quite annoying to make.
posted by The corpse in the library at 6:31 PM on April 29, 2011


Cobblers should stick to their last posts.
posted by flabdablet at 6:48 PM on April 29, 2011


So when IS this supposed to close?
posted by flatluigi at 7:43 PM on April 29, 2011


In the world according to MetaTalk, all threads are terminal cases.
posted by amyms at 8:05 PM on April 29, 2011


MetaTalk is a fatal illness.
posted by The Whelk at 8:05 PM on April 29, 2011


Well, it's closing in a couple of hours and a bit. Hopefully at that point I'll be asleep, dreaming of sailing around Mare Tranquillitatis in a boat pulled by balding unicorns ridden by various members of the Kennedy family. Actually, that's much too interesting... what I'll probably be dreaming of is something along the lines of stuffing junk mail in mail boxes (this actually being the most recent dream I can remember having). Christ my dreams are boring... if I didn't get rest out sleeping I don't know if I'd bother at all.

Anyway, best of luck to Meatbomb, here's hoping his dream comes true. I once snagged last post in one of these and all my fondest wishes were granted by the Genie of the Last Post.
posted by Kattullus at 8:12 PM on April 29, 2011


Oh man you have chose your words SO CAREFULLY with the Last Post Genie.
posted by The Whelk at 8:26 PM on April 29, 2011


I just heard the janitor out in the hallway. We're going to have to clear out soon. They need this space for the next Pony Request.
posted by amyms at 8:44 PM on April 29, 2011


I know what I'm going to ask the Last Post Genie.

It's about ponies.
posted by The Whelk at 8:46 PM on April 29, 2011


KÁRI TULINIUS

Small point of order: I thought Icelanders had the last name (father's name)-son? What's this Tulnius stuff then?
posted by Meatbomb at 9:15 PM on April 29, 2011


Sorry, that should be "Tulinius".
posted by Meatbomb at 9:23 PM on April 29, 2011


I guess living in Malaysia gives me the advantage if this thing is closing while the mass of cretins are all asleep.
posted by Meatbomb at 9:24 PM on April 29, 2011


Seems that perhaps this thread will be closing in exactly one hour and seven minutes.
posted by Meatbomb at 9:25 PM on April 29, 2011


we need a big flashing countdown clock.
posted by The Whelk at 9:26 PM on April 29, 2011


GO TO SLEEP The Whelk, nothing to see here!
posted by Meatbomb at 9:27 PM on April 29, 2011


I AM WORKING
posted by The Whelk at 9:27 PM on April 29, 2011


Trying to get the last post in this thread is NOT working, it is skiving. Please send me your line manager's contact info immediately.
posted by Meatbomb at 9:29 PM on April 29, 2011


the last post should be by someone not even trying
posted by flatluigi at 9:29 PM on April 29, 2011


Or someone who is trying, but actually found something to say.
posted by flatluigi at 9:29 PM on April 29, 2011


What would be hilarious is if we've still got another 24 hours before this ends.
posted by flatluigi at 9:30 PM on April 29, 2011


My whole life is one big skiv
posted by The Whelk at 9:30 PM on April 29, 2011


Interesting point, flatluigi. Let's all stop trying right now. 1, 2, 3, GO.
posted by Meatbomb at 9:32 PM on April 29, 2011


Meatbomb said: By definition, this will be considered the canonical last post in the thread regardless of any further dribbling and scribbling by this mass of cretins gathered around me. I win, and good day to you all.

... And we all lived happily ever after.
posted by amyms at 9:54 PM on April 29, 2011


Meatbomb, I just wanted to tell you good luck. We're all counting on you.
posted by quin at 9:57 PM on April 29, 2011 [2 favorites]


Time synchronizing comment.
posted by unliteral at 10:09 PM on April 29, 2011


Thundercats are go.
posted by The Whelk at 10:10 PM on April 29, 2011


I just bought a hand-packed pint of caramel with salted dark chocolate ice cream, so while I don't expect to have the last comment in here I also completely do not give even a minimal fuck.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:11 PM on April 29, 2011 [3 favorites]


A man's got to know his limitations.
posted by amyms at 10:12 PM on April 29, 2011


Why is thread not closed yet?
posted by maryr at 10:16 PM on April 29, 2011


15 more minutes, maryr. Patience is a virtue.
posted by amyms at 10:19 PM on April 29, 2011


Now in a Taco Bell drive thru. Long line of cars. Like some sort of microcosm of LA. Thread will probably close before we order.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:23 PM on April 29, 2011


Chalupa? Seven layer? I am paralyzed by choice. Human condition in 21 C.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:26 PM on April 29, 2011


I guess I give a little bit of a fuck.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:26 PM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


I do not think that real mods should be allowed to play these games, given the possibilities for corruption and abuse.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:28 PM on April 29, 2011


It's like Drive Thu Zen.
posted by The Whelk at 10:28 PM on April 29, 2011


I like it when Cortex joins in our reindeer games.
posted by The Whelk at 10:28 PM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


Fractal fuck. Mandelbrot meh. Lorenzian strange detractor.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:28 PM on April 29, 2011


What is stopping cortex from just closing the thread as soon as he posts?
posted by Meatbomb at 10:28 PM on April 29, 2011


I corrupted and abused your Meatmom. Who is, per previous, a fat lady.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:29 PM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


It's patently unfair. I think I'll be reporting this to mathowie.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:29 PM on April 29, 2011


Annnnnd.... Scene!
posted by amyms at 10:30 PM on April 29, 2011


I know that reading comprehension can be challenging at times grasshopper, but my instructions were for you to diddle YOUR OWN MOM. Leave Mrs. Meatbomb out of this, she's a saint.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:30 PM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


Decided: Grilled Stuft Burrito Steak.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:30 PM on April 29, 2011


LAST POST
posted by Meatbomb at 10:31 PM on April 29, 2011


And in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make.
posted by amyms at 10:31 PM on April 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


butts lol
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:31 PM on April 29, 2011


This time i MEAN IT.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:31 PM on April 29, 2011 [5 favorites]


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