Dump "awesome"

April 12, 2011 3:47 PM

Aren't you tired of "awesome"?

There's a dictionary full of words we could be using.
Why not try some of them, instead of perennially defaulting to "awesome"?
Does anyone else find it lazy and tiresome?
Un-awesome?

posted by fivesavagepalms to Etiquette/Policy at 3:47 PM (396 comments total)

Lame.
posted by Loto at 3:49 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

Not really. I find it kind of awesome, actually.
posted by Sheppagus at 3:50 PM on April 12, 2011 [10 favorites]

The face of prescriptive language?
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 3:50 PM on April 12, 2011 [10 favorites]

Is awesomesauce still okay?
posted by Sheppagus at 3:51 PM on April 12, 2011 [4 favorites]

It's totally deck!
posted by klangklangston at 3:51 PM on April 12, 2011 [10 favorites]

No. Nobody else does. It's just you.
posted by Aquaman at 3:52 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

Nope!

Pretty sure we can close this up now!
posted by MadamM at 3:52 PM on April 12, 2011

Saying things are "awesome" is, some say, one of the most appalling habits in the known Universe. Although it is excruciatingly happy, horrifyingly perky and more full of wonderfully exciting exlamation points than a pomegranate is of pips, it can hardly be insignificant that when a recent thread on Metafilter included with the words "When you are tired of saying things are awesome you are tired of life," the suicide rate there quadrupled overnight.
posted by feckless at 3:53 PM on April 12, 2011 [9 favorites]

I think there's better words to rail against here:

fighty
snark
snarky
ironic (used incorrectly)
filter(as in boyfriendfilter, relationshipfilter)-totally useless on askme.
posted by hal_c_on at 3:53 PM on April 12, 2011 [8 favorites]

I really hate the word signage. Can we get that one blacklisted too?
posted by Sheppagus at 3:54 PM on April 12, 2011 [4 favorites]

Quit trying to make "fetch" happen, Gretchen.
posted by padraigin at 3:54 PM on April 12, 2011 [48 favorites]

Or rather: I roll my eyes a little at limited vocabulary and have noticed the overuse of "awesome," especially as it echos my prepubescent cohort's similar overuse of "awesome," "radical," "bodacious," and "heinous," but that's mostly because I'm sensitive to kids unironically repeating the folly of the past.

I do encourage you to either create new words to replace it, or to chillax, duder.
posted by klangklangston at 3:54 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

I agree: you should stop using the word "awesome".
posted by Salvor Hardin at 3:55 PM on April 12, 2011

But what else can I rhyme with "possum"?
posted by backseatpilot at 3:57 PM on April 12, 2011

Possum does not rhyme with awesome.
Try foursome instead.
posted by Miss Otis' Egrets at 3:59 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

Aren't you tired of "awesome"?


No.
posted by furiousxgeorge at 3:59 PM on April 12, 2011

Miss Otis' Egrets: Possum does not rhyme with awesome.
Try foursome instead.

As in I just saw a foursome of pourssum?
posted by filthy light thief at 4:01 PM on April 12, 2011 [8 favorites]

I have more hatred in my heart for "made of awesome" or "full of win" and similar corruptions. If you don't actually have anything to say, why bother with words? A simple bleat of either pleasure or dismay will suffice.
posted by hermitosis at 4:02 PM on April 12, 2011 [28 favorites]

Is awesome worse than yummy? Or the phrase "love me some"?
posted by Ideefixe at 4:04 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

Aren't you tired of "awesome"?

That's not what your mother asked me last night.



no really, she didn't ask me that
posted by found missing at 4:04 PM on April 12, 2011 [7 favorites]

I understand what people mean when they say "awesome."
posted by Mngo at 4:07 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

you are not the boss of me and my awesome.
posted by elizardbits at 4:07 PM on April 12, 2011 [6 favorites]

Smidge.

Quatrephile.

Yummo.
posted by boo_radley at 4:07 PM on April 12, 2011

Gnarly.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:08 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

Streets ahead?
Mao-some
Kitchy
T'vective
Rilksoup
T'nastoq
Barsis
Realsoh
P'yq
Nistis
Nostis
Nostoq
posted by infinite intimation at 4:08 PM on April 12, 2011

Awesome is so money and it doesn't even know it.
posted by Deathalicious at 4:10 PM on April 12, 2011 [6 favorites]

As of the start of 2011, "awesome" has apparently been used a bit more than 89,000 times on various parts of metafilter, a bit less than 200 times for every million words uttered. By contrast, "great" comes in at about 850 parts per million, and "good" at 1900 ppm.

So that seems like a reasonable fall-off curve for intensity of descriptors.

On the other hand, "keen" only clocks 9 ppm. The obvious conclusion is people should say "keen" more often.

More information is available on the Corpus Frequency page!
posted by cortex (staff) at 4:10 PM on April 12, 2011 [46 favorites]

I have a limited threshold of awe.

The very fact that I wake up every morning and poop comes out my butt (preferably in that order)? Awesome!

Air goes in and out of my lungs and keeps me alive? Awesome!

The moon doesn't come crashing out of the sky and squish me like a bug? Awesome!

Everything's awesome if you approach life as the wonder that it is.

But I suspect that's not what you're talking about.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 4:11 PM on April 12, 2011 [31 favorites]

Tiresome.
posted by ericb at 4:12 PM on April 12, 2011

I prefer "nifty".
posted by deborah at 4:12 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

My vote's for snazzy.
posted by iconomy at 4:14 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

We could bring back "bitchin'". I'd be for that.
posted by BeerFilter at 4:15 PM on April 12, 2011 [8 favorites]

Aren't you tired of "awesome"?

There's a dictionary full of words we could be using.
Why not try some of them, instead of perennially defaulting to "awesome"?
Does anyone else find it lazy and tiresome?
Un-awesome?

I'm guessing you grew up before the Era of Awesome, during the Epoch of Swell.
posted by StrikeTheViol at 4:16 PM on April 12, 2011 [7 favorites]

When we're done with "awesome," I'm moving on to "razzle-dazzle," so I think it's best if we stick with awesome for now.
posted by SMPA at 4:16 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

"joseph conrad is a superb writer who combines action and psychology in his stories to reveal truths about human nature" just doesn't have the same ring.
posted by joseph conrad is fully awesome at 4:17 PM on April 12, 2011 [14 favorites]

(by the way, what does it say about us that the "precision" tag is so underutilized?)
posted by SMPA at 4:18 PM on April 12, 2011

What if we keep using it but in an ironic way?
posted by puny human at 4:18 PM on April 12, 2011

swell: 5 ppm
bitchin: 1 ppm
snazzy: 1 ppm
razzle-dazzle: 0.03 ppm
posted by cortex (staff) at 4:18 PM on April 12, 2011

"Awesome" is perfectly cromulent.
posted by DU at 4:19 PM on April 12, 2011 [6 favorites]

You know what I really hate? Eh, you probably wouldn't be interested.
posted by Roger Dodger at 4:20 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

I and the 1980s respectfully disagree.
posted by Afroblanco at 4:20 PM on April 12, 2011 [6 favorites]

I hate it when Afroblanco disagrees with an entire decade.
posted by found missing at 4:21 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Let's all revert to "excellent".
posted by Meatbomb at 4:22 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

I've only seen the word "corpus" on this website like 56 times and I already hate it. Also "belly".
posted by DU at 4:22 PM on April 12, 2011

Epic call-out.
posted by PareidoliaticBoy at 4:22 PM on April 12, 2011 [4 favorites]

Just stick with cool. Cool's cool.
posted by The Card Cheat at 4:30 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

I'm keen on that idea.
posted by zachlipton at 4:35 PM on April 12, 2011

Flagged as "Not Awesome"
posted by briank at 4:35 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

I hate muchly. Everyone needs to stop saying muchly. And sanger, I hate that one too.

Thanks!
posted by h00py at 4:36 PM on April 12, 2011

Like dude, I am like so tired of like lame dudes telling me I can't like use like whatever words I want. Dude, whatever.
posted by zennie at 4:37 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

awesome
posted by inigo2 at 4:38 PM on April 12, 2011

(just trying to do my part.)
posted by inigo2 at 4:38 PM on April 12, 2011

Hey, here's an idea:

I'll say whatever the fuck I please, however the fuck I want to.

How about that? Does that work for you?

Awesome.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 4:39 PM on April 12, 2011 [64 favorites]

There's a dictionary full of words we could be using. Why not try some of them, instead of perennially defaulting to "awesome"?

- Wow, that post was propensity!
- Guys, I found this really laminated website!
- I used to think Ayn Rand was totally office!
- Then!
- I can't believe how necklace it is!
- Samurai Pizza Cats is more prevalent than I remember!
- Fuck, that's valet!
- There was this across youtube video I saw once - it really was saliva!

THIS DOESN'T WORK.
posted by doublehappy at 4:40 PM on April 12, 2011 [126 favorites]

fivesavagepalms, why do you hate the Miz?
posted by Ghidorah at 4:41 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

That's totally bananas!
posted by zombiehoohaa at 4:42 PM on April 12, 2011

Years ago one of my High School teachers attempted to introduce the phrase "Dump truck" in the same place as "Awesome" for example:

"That movie was Dump Truck"

He did this as an experiment to see how far it would go, or how long it would take to reach critical mass, it remains an injoke to me and my brother, and that's about it. Maybe mefi can take it further.
posted by hellojed at 4:43 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

Awesome Synonyms, Awesome Antonyms.
posted by zennie at 4:44 PM on April 12, 2011

OK, from now on we're alternating Cindy Crawford's "Aerobicise" and "Buns of Steel", and reading one non-school book a week. My first book is "Fit or Fat".
posted by Uniformitarianism Now! at 4:45 PM on April 12, 2011 [5 favorites]

Streets ahead.
posted by auto-correct at 4:48 PM on April 12, 2011 [5 favorites]

Ossum. Bonus is it does, indeed, rhyme with "possum."
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 4:49 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

I actually use "awesome" most when I'm thanking someone on the phone or in a shop. e.g. "So I can pick that up on Thursday? Awesome, thanks." I am comfortable with that and direct you to BitterOldPunk's comment above.
posted by doublehappy at 4:49 PM on April 12, 2011

To Americans it must no doubt call to mind the inanity of their inerudite compatriots.

To the rest of the world it indicates something that inspires awe and is interchangeable with the term awe-inspiring.
posted by fire&wings at 4:49 PM on April 12, 2011

I am in awe of a great many things. Today for example: catbirds, red trim, shiny cars parked in people's backyards, chalupas, the fact that I didn't actually lose my power cord, air conditioning, jasmine flowers, the sun, little dogs, the mighty librarians of texas, stray cats and interstate travel.

I also like the fact that the word rhymes with possums, because they are really weird and fascinating animals. Sometimes I think I say awesome just to rhyme it with those wily marsupials.

Is it possible your awe-o-meter is maladjusted? I suppose it is also possible that I'm a bit dim.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 4:51 PM on April 12, 2011 [35 favorites]

I'm way more tired of 'totes,' "GRAR" and of course 'fighty."

I am also sick of non-Brits affecting Limey-isms.
posted by jonmc at 4:52 PM on April 12, 2011 [4 favorites]

Awesome is... nice.
posted by Splunge at 4:54 PM on April 12, 2011

Around 1985, I suspected that "massive" was an imminent usurper of "awesome." I think I may have imagined it, though.

This is one of the silliest posts I've seen in here; I've seen MeFites flogged mercilessly for more tenable MeTa posts. Maybe I imagined that too.
posted by herbplarfegan at 4:54 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Even if I agreed with you, describe a mechanism that would make this work. Because otherwise this is just non-awesome grar-filter.
posted by lumpenprole at 4:54 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

This is the original chalupa.

These are also chalupas.

This is not a chalupa.

One of those is not awesome.
posted by Dr. Curare at 4:59 PM on April 12, 2011

I think awesome is pail, it's totally bucket

I am also sick of non-Brits affecting Limey-isms.

Oi!
posted by Hoopo at 4:59 PM on April 12, 2011 [4 favorites]

My usage of awesome is not perennial, I try to make it punctuated.

See, when grabbing at synonyms of awesome, the problem becomes apparent.
Those synonyms zennie links have contextual signifiers; they come with baggage (implied feeling, shock, surprise, disdain), awesome meanwhile, is a linguistic chameleon-awesome word which manages to consume its synonyms within the plasmid body of it's conjunctively-definitional-cell-membrane. At once potentially signifying a gasp of amazement; yet potentially the same word can be used in the most mundane of situations (see you in 10; K, awesome).

If words are the single-cell organisms making up the ecosystem of complex language; Awesome is a metaphorically phagocytic word.

And perhaps, if we are lucky, one day a new sub-signifier word will become entombed in the slithering mass of awesome, and will, rather than being consumed, become an integral part of the working mechanism of Awesome, the dream is that it will perform Endosymbiosis - and become an even niftier new word-opus.

Realsoh may be pronounced "Real-Saw"
posted by infinite intimation at 4:59 PM on April 12, 2011 [5 favorites]

Dump "awesome"

But where, exactly? Waste disposal is always the trickiest part.
posted by staggernation at 5:00 PM on April 12, 2011

I am personally responsible for 5 instances of the word awesome just in my 9 AskMe questions. Sorry for all the joie de vivre.
posted by chatongriffes at 5:00 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Oi!

Vey. (Now it's a Yiddishism).
posted by jonmc at 5:01 PM on April 12, 2011

Like.
posted by ardgedee at 5:02 PM on April 12, 2011

I think awesome is the berries, the bee's knees and the cat's pajamas all rolled into one sublime and bitchin' mess of amazing.

Or something like that
posted by thivaia at 5:02 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

Is this a request for metafilter, or all of English-speaking humanity? Maybe you should take this to metanglophone.
posted by Terminal Verbosity at 5:02 PM on April 12, 2011 [4 favorites]

Awesome is the cat's pajamas.
posted by killdevil at 5:04 PM on April 12, 2011

Like.

Y'know?
posted by Ghidorah at 5:04 PM on April 12, 2011

Today I said streetage. As in: "This town has some weird streetage." I didn't realize what I had done. If anyone wants to take me out back and shoot me for saying that, you'd be totally justified.
posted by marxchivist at 5:05 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

cortex: The obvious conclusion is people should say "keen" more often.

KEEN! (source)
posted by filthy light thief at 5:11 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Just be glad nobody, not even New Englanders, seem to use "Pissah" here.

When I was 18 and my cousin came over from Ireland, it took him about half a day before he stopped, looked at me, and screamed "Can you tell me whut da fook 'wicked awesome' means?"

From now on I shall use the phrase "The bee's motherfuckin' knees."
posted by bondcliff at 5:12 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

This post made me think of this. (Which is pretty awesome, really). Perhaps we could all club together to raise money to buy fivesavagepalms the components to make his/her own.
posted by lollusc at 5:12 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Fruit forward.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 5:12 PM on April 12, 2011

Lately I'm all about the descriptor "yankin'".
posted by hermitosis at 5:16 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

I had some friends who used 'wicked awesome'.

To Americans it must no doubt call to mind the inanity of their inerudite compatriots.

Oh get over yourself.

I love this place but this post is the perfect example of the sort of pedantry and nit picking that bugs me, and probably other people.

It would be cool if 'awesome' still meant 'inspiring awe', but its colloquial use is still pretty handy. And honestly I'm mostly here to chat about music, b-movies, and comic books. 'Awesome' is a perfectly good word for it'.
'Made of win' is bad, though
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 5:17 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Streets ahead.

If you're not streets ahead, you're streets behind.
posted by Afroblanco at 5:17 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

OK, OP, you don't like awesome. But what do you like? As the one proposing the ban, isn't the burden on you to suggest some good alternatives?

There are many near synonyms. "Cool," "great," "excellent" ... but none of those is a perfect replacement for "awesome." "Cool" sounds like you care too much about being cool, as in "hip." "Great" is overused and best reserved for weighty contexts like "Citizen Kane is widely considered one of the greatest movies of all time." "Excellent" is too stodgy and Mr. Burns-esque.
posted by John Cohen at 5:19 PM on April 12, 2011

Strammaging. It doesn't mean the same thing, but Joyce Cary was awesome, so his word should show up in Google more.
posted by OmieWise at 5:20 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

I noticed I have been saying awesome a lot recently. I guess it means you (I?) are (am?) really excited and enthusiastic- I don't mind being like that, especially since it has since sort of just recently worn off... in fact I hope to say awesome MORE this upcoming week. Dare to dream!
posted by bquarters at 5:20 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

I have made you a very simple script.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 5:24 PM on April 12, 2011 [5 favorites]

Peachy. Peachy-keen.
posted by arcticwoman at 5:25 PM on April 12, 2011

Someday I am going to make up a list of the things people have requested others not do anymore. Seriously. It'd be like 14 pages long.

Also, I'm fairly certain the request to dump awesome has been made previously.
posted by cjorgensen at 5:27 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

I fully support statements above to butt out of how we talk.

I also fully support the death penalty for using "drops" for an album/book/movie/game release date or "no worries" in any context not involving a really big knife.
posted by DU at 5:28 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Oh, lord yes. 'Yummo.'

*shudder*

Please make it stop.
posted by Space Kitty at 5:29 PM on April 12, 2011

Ok, I'll stop using "awesome", but only if I can switch it up for "cold lampin"
posted by puny human at 5:30 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

I'm WAY more tired of "epic." It's started to make me cringe.
posted by Ashley801 at 5:31 PM on April 12, 2011 [5 favorites]

Ok, I'll stop using "awesome", but only if I can switch it up for "cold lampin"

It depends. Do you possess louies? Are you now or have you ever been known to tramp?
posted by bondcliff at 5:35 PM on April 12, 2011

I proposed no ban.
I prescribed nothing.
Say what you like.
I just wondered what, if anything, you thought about awesome.
I'm enjoying your responses.
Thanks for an entertaining hour.
posted by fivesavagepalms at 5:35 PM on April 12, 2011

Hmm. I remember honing my "awesome" pronunciation skills by listening to the MetaDude's way of saying it, like, often, during recent podcasts. You might be attacking giants here...

Is rip-roaring okay or should we latinize: cooliter? A little playfulness would be awesome, sort of keeps down the GRAR.

(Note to self: start MetaThread in defense of the awesome word GRAR.)
posted by Namlit at 5:35 PM on April 12, 2011

Wrong apostrophe too. I think I'll go sleep now.
posted by Namlit at 5:37 PM on April 12, 2011

Also, I'm fairly certain the request to dump awesome has been made previously.

I think you and awesome should consider couples' counseling.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 5:40 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

Now it's a Yiddishism

Yiddishizzm my nizzm.
posted by staggernation at 5:41 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

My friends started using "amazeballs" recently. You could try that on for size.
posted by elmer benson at 5:41 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

So kvetchy!
posted by Burhanistan at 5:44 PM on April 12, 2011

Don't Call Me Dude!
posted by nomisxid at 5:45 PM on April 12, 2011

Yiddishizzm my nizzm.

Hey, I rock mad yiddish
Kaddish & Kiddish
Shtuppin' all the shiksas
my gelt is green like spinach
posted by jonmc at 5:46 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

Tell you what, fivesavagepalms—send me an awesome button and I'll use it.
posted by adamrice at 5:46 PM on April 12, 2011

neat, nifty, bad ass, tremendous, keen, cunning, clever
posted by ersatzkat at 5:46 PM on April 12, 2011

sweet
posted by ersatzkat at 5:48 PM on April 12, 2011

This thread right here. It's awe-

wait for it


-some!
posted by oddman at 5:53 PM on April 12, 2011

...and I knew someone who, inexplicably, would say "cat's ass" like you would say "cat's pyjamas" or "bee's knees"...like, "hey, I LOVE that _____ - it's just the cat's ass". I find that weird and charming.
posted by ersatzkat at 5:53 PM on April 12, 2011

I like "terrific", because it has a tinge of sarcasm, even if it's not intended.
posted by DrGirlfriend at 5:54 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Awesome troll is awesome.
posted by mullacc at 5:55 PM on April 12, 2011

Ron Weasley says "wicked"
posted by Namlit at 5:58 PM on April 12, 2011

Just be happy I don't type awesome nearly as much as I say it. Sometimes I wonder if I say it too much, and then I remember that I am from California, and I can say whatever I want, because dude, why not.

From now on I shall use the phrase "The bee's motherfuckin' knees."

I prefer the crisp construction of "the bee's nuts". It never fails to elicit a slight raising of the eyebrows among the uninitiated.
posted by oneirodynia at 6:01 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Once upon a time, the nerds with which I spent my internet time tried to replace the word "cool" with the word "carbonic" but that was before awesome came back into vogue. Once in a while I'll call something "totally carbonic" and be pleased at the doubletakes. So. There's that.
posted by Mizu at 6:04 PM on April 12, 2011

Gnarly.
posted by crunchland at 6:20 PM on April 12, 2011

One of my favorite bumper stickers is "God is Awesome".
posted by pianomover at 6:23 PM on April 12, 2011

Whelkish.
posted by The Whelk at 6:24 PM on April 12, 2011

I proposed no ban.
I prescribed nothing.
Say what you like.
I just wondered what, if anything, you thought about awesome.
I'm enjoying your responses.
Thanks for an entertaining hour.
posted by fivesavagepalms at 7:35 PM on April 12

I would have to argue that titling your callout Dump "awesome" counts as proposing a ban.
posted by Daddy-O at 6:24 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

I'm bringin' back hot! That shit is hot, B!
posted by Mister_A at 6:28 PM on April 12, 2011

No wait "hot" is played. Imma make up a new one:

EATS BOOGERS!

Like, that post is so dope, IT EATS BOOGERS!!

I think we could make this work.
posted by Mister_A at 6:30 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

everyone needs to adopt 19th century slang RIGHT NOW.
posted by The Whelk at 6:33 PM on April 12, 2011

Mint.
posted by dirtdirt at 6:34 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

How about moist? Everyone loves moist, right?
posted by Rock Steady at 6:35 PM on April 12, 2011

Von Lepwig? Right?
posted by The Whelk at 6:38 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

I like his gold suit.
posted by The Whelk at 6:38 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

I'm fine with awesome. Perhaps your awesome is my "epic."
posted by birdherder at 6:39 PM on April 12, 2011

everyone needs to adopt 19th century slang RIGHT NOW.

*goes to google*

"19th century slang"

*feels lucky*

didoes: to cut up didoes was to get into mischief.

1835: Must all the world know all the didoes we cut up in the lodgeroom? D.P. Thompson, Adventures of Timothy Peacock, p. 170

1838: If you keep a cutting didoes, I must talk to you like a Dutch uncle. J.C. Neal, Charcoal Sketches, p.201

I'm not sure I like this game.
posted by cortex (staff) at 6:40 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

everyone needs to adopt 19th century slang RIGHT NOW. --- That would cap the climax.
posted by crunchland at 6:41 PM on April 12, 2011

"As the one proposing the ban, isn't the burden on you to suggest some good alternatives?"

Blossom.
Clawsome.
Dawsome.
Fawsum.
Gaussum.
Hawsome.
Jawsome.
Krawsome.
Lawsome.
Mawsome.
Nawsum.
Opossum.
Possum.
Quasome.
Rossum.
Thawsome.
Vawsome.
Wahsome.
Xsm!
Zawsome.

Yawsome.
posted by klangklangston at 6:49 PM on April 12, 2011

Oh, are we doing word things? Anybody up for joining my committee to save the word "tonic" for soda/pop/coke? It's a good word. Also I would like to bring back "tight" for "drunk."

And then all I have to do is catch syphillis and I'm Dorothy Parker.
posted by Diablevert at 6:51 PM on April 12, 2011 [6 favorites]

Before I wade into a reading of this madness, I see that nobody yet has mentioned

PUKKA

as a viable alternative. For shame.
posted by carsonb at 6:55 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

I'm more irritated with how many things come in tins that have descriptive packaging. That's one phrase I'd never mind seeing again.
posted by codacorolla at 6:58 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

so yer sayin mods be right pukka and the rest o us lurkerlads gotta be useros?
posted by The Whelk at 7:00 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

Today I said streetage. As in: "This town has some weird streetage." I didn't realize what I had done. If anyone wants to take me out back and shoot me for saying that, you'd be totally justified.

I once said "There's a new kitten at my flat, so over the weekend we did the bondage thing" at work.

It wasn't very awesome.
posted by Sparx at 7:03 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Being a foreigner I never hear awesome spoken. So to me it's devoid of class war associations. (i.e. not wanting to be the kind of person who says that)
What I like about the word is that it seems an uncomplicated utterance of approval. When you try to be clever in your word choice of approval the emotion has already traveled through layers of filtering, reducing, to me, the emotional honesty.

Hm. Why not just use 'good'? Or, when a superlative is needed, 'very good'?
posted by joost de vries at 7:03 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Fo shizzle.
posted by spitbull at 7:06 PM on April 12, 2011

around fivesavagepalms
don't say "awesome"
unless you want
to upset or cross'em
posted by owtytrof at 7:12 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

John Wayne as a centurion at the crucifixion in 'the greatest story ever told':

(in full western accent) "He was surely the son of god!"
(Director to Wayne) "Could you say that with more awe?"
(same accent) "Awww, he was surely the son of god!"

I don't mind awesome. I'm just glad 'excellent' (abbreviated to 'ex') seems to be extinct.
That's ex!
posted by hexatron at 7:16 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Man, this thread is just so unrighteously harshing my bodaciously awesome mellow, so I only have one thing to say:

Moist.
posted by loquacious at 7:16 PM on April 12, 2011 [5 favorites]

YOU JUST ENSURED EXCELLENT WILL LIVE FOREVER.

IN MY MIND.

IN THE PLACE IN MY MIND.

IT IS EXCELLENT.
posted by The Whelk at 7:17 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

Moist Von Lipwig
posted by The Whelk at 7:17 PM on April 12, 2011

I like the rumors that he's being groomed to be Ventiari's replacement
posted by The Whelk at 7:18 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

Low snark entree option: I think most people here would agree that words like "awesome" and "epic" have been heavily devalued by casual language, but language is alive, and it all depends a lot on context and intonation. When someone says "I went to this totally awesome party last night" I think most people know by know that they weren't actually filled with fearsome awe and left trembling or otherwise awestruck... though come to think of that I have been to a few parties that good.

Anyway. Prescribing language choices upon others is doubleplus ungood. Language lives. The only sure way to modify language and a lasting mark is to participate in it's invention and influence it through pure, uh, awesomeness.
posted by loquacious at 7:32 PM on April 12, 2011 [7 favorites]

I'll take awesome over "cool beans" any day. I thought that phrase died in the 80s (thank heavens), but it is now being used, non-ironically, on a terrible, awful, no-good, very bad program that my children love to watch until I swear I'm going to put my foot through the television.

When that day comes? It will be TOTALLY awesome.
posted by Lulu's Pink Converse at 7:35 PM on April 12, 2011

pip pip, old chum.
posted by cj_ at 8:00 PM on April 12, 2011

I briefly knew a young chap who used the abbreviated version of "gnarly" in every other sentence. As in, "Dude, that's gnar!!".....I'll take "awesome" over "gnar" any day.
posted by Bron-Y-Aur at 8:10 PM on April 12, 2011

Fuck You! YAYYYYYYYY!
posted by Divine_Wino at 8:17 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Wow, I actually like the sound of "valet" instead of "awesome." There's some vague associations that make it sound like it almost makes sense, too.
posted by Nattie at 8:21 PM on April 12, 2011

Looks like we're finally getting to the end of the internet. Once we wrap this one up I fear there won't be much left.
posted by Slack-a-gogo at 8:21 PM on April 12, 2011

I have no beef with the word awesome. I am getting sick of seeing it self-applied though. I doesn't seem like a day goes by without seeing somebody say, in one form or another, gosh, look at how awesome I am. "I had three beers last night. I'm just that awesome." "My friends and I just ate smoked turkey. We're awesome!" "I'm so proud of the awesome job I just did mowing my lawn!"

I am of the opinion that awesome should not be publicly self-applied. I don't mind if people wish to look in their mirrors and tell themselves how awesome they are as some sort of exercise in positive thinking, or as an affirmation, or whatever their fractured ego needs to bolster itself up for another wretched day. Do what you have to.

But like "beautiful" or "funny" or "smart" or "cool," "awesome" is a term that really awesome people need not self-apply in public. It announces itself. And you sound either conceited or desperate for any approval, even your own, when you use it regarding something you do.

But then, I am from Minnesota, and we collectively rankle when somebody seems like they're getting too big for their britches. And by rankle, I mean we grumble and stare daggers at them, as we are a passive aggressive people.

As to alternatives to "awesome," The Beatles used to use "gear" all the time. "I thought that platter was really gear." "It's really gear to snog with a bird." Maybe it's a Britishism, so it might rankle jonmc, but fuck him.
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:27 PM on April 12, 2011 [4 favorites]

Oops, that last part was sort of a New Yorkism. I am not a New Yorker. I take it back.
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:27 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

Pukka?

Pukka is a peculiar word - I'm not sure how many words of this sort exist - in that the modern usage invariably conveys two quite unrelated ideas. Calling something 'pukka' shows us both the speaker's appreciation for the thing being so described and the fact that the speaker is some kind of knob. They may be anything from a bit of a knob up to a complete knob, but by using the word 'pukka' in that way they clearly identify themselves as existing somewhere on the knob spectrum. Whether or not the speaker is aware of that fact is left for listeners to derive from context.

Nothing at all like 'awesome', with which there is nothing wrong at all, especially, with its overuse, in the more mundane and sarcastic usages.
posted by motty at 8:32 PM on April 12, 2011

And by rankle, I mean we grumble and stare daggers at them, as we are a passive aggressive people.

This in and of itself explains Jesse Ventura.
posted by clavdivs at 8:33 PM on April 12, 2011

Waaaaahsome
posted by scody at 8:37 PM on April 12, 2011

Can we all agree that anyone who says 'tits' should be immediately beaten with a sack full of doorknobs
posted by Existential Dread at 8:50 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

I'm guessing you grew up before the Era of Awesome, during the Epoch of Swell.
posted by StrikeTheViol

I am so out of date.

But I remember the Boss '60s before Mr. Springsteen usurped that word. Also Groovy.

Other good words:
Incredible
Legendary (why should Barney on HIMYM be the only one to overuse it?)
Unbelievable (or as a character of LaughIn used to mispronounce it Unbeleegitable)

I also endorse the use of Humongous beyond its normal definition of BIG.
posted by oneswellfoop at 8:50 PM on April 12, 2011

And being an addict for deep-fried onion thingies I endorse the Awesome Blossom. Which I dip in Awesome Sauce.
posted by oneswellfoop at 8:52 PM on April 12, 2011

Weak sauce.
posted by infinitywaltz at 8:58 PM on April 12, 2011

But cool beans.
posted by infinitywaltz at 8:58 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

I wasn't aware of all the hate for pukka. I've heard it used in India along with its sibling "dubba." In case you're curious, "dubba" literally means "box" in Tamil, but is used interchangeably with "dumb." No, I don't get it either.
posted by yaymukund at 8:59 PM on April 12, 2011

I'll take awesome over "cool beans" any day.

The first time I ever heard this expression, I had no idea what it meant, so I said, "Thanks!"

And the guy who said it was like, "No, I meant, 'That's cool,' or 'That's neat.' You know, 'Cool beans.'"

And I was like, "Oh, I just thought you were complimenting my beans."
posted by infinitywaltz at 8:59 PM on April 12, 2011 [6 favorites]

I'm drinking a dump truck cup of coffee right now.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 9:00 PM on April 12, 2011

When we're talking about exploding stars or little kids giving Disney the business by bowing to Lord Vader or some amazing silent film, I use the word awesome because that's what seems appropriate. I may not be a twenty year old college student anymore, but that same sense of wonder is still there, inside.
posted by Kevin Street at 9:02 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

Why not try some of them, instead of perennially defaulting to "awesome"?

I think you should dump "perennially" because it reminds me of perennial plants, which reminds me of the Burpee seed catalog, which reminds me that Burpee rhymes with Slurpee, and I had a traumatic brain freeze incident as a child when I drank a Slurpee too quickly.

Thanks for your understanding.
posted by amyms at 9:04 PM on April 12, 2011 [4 favorites]

I just searched my comment history, and have apparently found 78 things to be "amazing."
posted by Devils Rancher at 9:06 PM on April 12, 2011

i like the words "twitch" and "thud". I just, you know, like the way they sound.

Oh, and "salamander". that7s a good one too.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:07 PM on April 12, 2011

I hate "cool beans" and "keen" and "spiffy" and all that affected shit. And if you say "swell," you'd better be at least as old as my grandmother.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 9:08 PM on April 12, 2011

Oh, and I7m substituting 7s for apostrophes from now on.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:08 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

I just searched my comment history, and have apparently found 78 things to be "amazing."

seventy eight ol' huntin' dogs,
each one had caught a possum!
seventy eight amazing things,
hey that was pretty awesome!

yeah, I know, it's pretty lame, but YOU try rhyming "awesome"...
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:13 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

That7s pretty dump truck.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 9:13 PM on April 12, 2011

and I don't wanna see no gaht-dam blossoms...
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:13 PM on April 12, 2011

You GO Gurl!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:14 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

I have made you a very simple script.
posted by jessamyn's mum ★
I know. It's awesome! As you can see, I use it for evil, not just for correcting poor spelling.
posted by dg at 9:15 PM on April 12, 2011

I LIKE TO SAY "HEY THAT SHIT IS THE BUSINESS, YO!"
posted by infinitywaltz at 9:22 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

The thing is, "awesome" isn't merely a comment on the noun being described; it generally communicates, and seeks to share, a state of joy experienced by the utterer. As such, injecting it frequently into written discourse is a way of seeking to share this joy, to raise the mood, and to encourage community bonding by associating communication with happiness.
posted by amtho at 9:25 PM on April 12, 2011 [7 favorites]

If you're tired of awesome, don't use it. It's that simple. I often try to find synonyms or just plain different words when I feel my language getting stale. You'll never stop people from using a word just by asking them to stop. You'll have to kill them if you want them to stop. Or just start using a really awesome alternative that everyone sees and wants to emulate. Otherwise it's murder/maiming or just grit your teeth and bear it.
posted by Eideteker at 9:25 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

For the record, I came across pukka in the AmEng dictionary I read one summer long ago, and have only seen it used in context very rarely. All of the cultural connotations that have cropped up around it in the UK and India are completely lost on me—I like the way it sounds and what the dictionary says about it: 1. Genuine; authentic. 2. Superior; first-class.
posted by carsonb at 9:26 PM on April 12, 2011

Gay: As awesome as two people who are experts on penises having sex without fear of pregnancy.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 9:27 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

How about "tough" like in The Outsiders?
posted by Hoopo at 9:28 PM on April 12, 2011

I'm tepid on 'cool beans' but I fucking love 'cool bananas.' Because bananas are awesome, and being awesome is where I'm a viking!
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 9:33 PM on April 12, 2011

During the first 5 seasons of Buffy IGN tried to get 'Joss' to replace 'awesome'. Like 'man, this comic is so Joss'.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 9:39 PM on April 12, 2011

I've been watching my roommate's DVD's of The Wire like a mu'fucker recently, so a lot of choice bits of dialog have filtered into my lexicon, like "a good police" and "How do?" and "throw a fuck into her." Not all of these are good additions, obviously.

That said, while I like awesome well enough, I;d be willing to replace it with "like a forty-degree day!"
posted by Navelgazer at 9:56 PM on April 12, 2011

Do they still do awesome/not awesome on TBTL? if you know what i mean, and you probably don't
posted by Kwine at 9:57 PM on April 12, 2011

I agree - awesome does not convey much meaning anymore. We need a word that is really what awesome used to be.

I have an idea! We can use "jamocha"! We can shorten it to jamoke. Or jamokes. Or jamokey. Usage:"This waterslide is totes jamokes."
posted by Arby's Retaurant Group at 9:59 PM on April 12
posted by milkrate at 10:00 PM on April 12, 2011 [2 favorites]

"Before I wade into a reading of this madness, I see that nobody yet has mentioned

PUKKA

as a viable alternative. For shame."

As per the Unexpurgated Code!
posted by klangklangston at 10:09 PM on April 12, 2011

Saying things are "awesome" is, some say, one of the most appalling habits in the known Universe. Although it is excruciatingly happy, horrifyingly perky and more full of wonderfully exciting exlamation points than a pomegranate is of pips, it can hardly be insignificant that when a recent thread on Metafilter included with the words "When you are tired of saying things are awesome you are tired of life," the suicide rate there quadrupled overnight.



Once in a while, a comment reaffirms to me just how awesome this place is. Thanks feckless.



(I was actually wondering as soon as I saw the post if somebody was going to make a reference along these lines. I shouldn't have worried.)
posted by kmz at 10:28 PM on April 12, 2011

(Is anybody else having weird connectivity issues with Metatalk? Everything else on the site works fine, but for the past couple of days, I keep having intermittent timeouts with pages on Metatalk. Is it just me?)
posted by kmz at 10:30 PM on April 12, 2011

it could be worse - we could have a lot of people describing things as "awesomo" - and this predates the south park episode by years
posted by pyramid termite at 10:31 PM on April 12, 2011

in fact, sir, that is what i will do - i will now describe things as awesomo instead of awesome
posted by pyramid termite at 10:32 PM on April 12, 2011

I'll fully admit that I haven't read this whole thread. I jumped here from a comment on the sidebar that had 12 favorites. [I've always wanted to ask this. Does anyone else almost automatically favorite a comment with 11 favorites, just so it will get 12 and end up on the sidebar? I do. I'm not proud of it.]

Anyway, awesome rhymes with possum, or opossum if you're being proper. And I have a backyard 9-o'clock possum who comes along each night to gobble the leftover chicken food. He looks like Richard Nixon, but he doesn't have a neck. He looks like what would happen if Richard Nixon and some neckless person had little possum babies who grew up to be big ugly backyard possums.

In any case, my point is that 9-o'clock possum really likes his chicken food. And one night I went out to shut the chicken coop, and 9-o'clock possum was standing between me and the coop, absently ruminating on some Layena. Not that possums ruminate. Because they don't have four stomachs like cows do. But the effect was the same.

But whatever. He was standing there, and I wanted to cross his path, so I picked up the window screen that was leaning up against the fake, plastic Adirondack chair on the porch. I really like Adirondack chairs, but they are HELLA expensive! Have you ever noticed that? I mean, I have basic woodworking skills, and I know that I could probably make one (imperfectly, but still), so I don't understand why a nice wooden Adirondack chair costs $250 when you could make one from $50 of minimally warped Home Depot lumber. The plastic ones, they are a shame-facedly acceptable substitute for ~$20, I tell myself. (Except that the chickens like to sit in them too, and they shit on the $25 cushions, and that's a pain.)

But the thing about fake plastic Adirondack chairs is that you can lean your window screens up against them whilst you hose them off during spring cleaning. And even if spring cleaning starts in January and still hasn't finished in mid-April, having those window screens leaning up against the fake Adirondack chairs for months isn't going to make the chairs rot any faster, because they're plastic and they're not going to rot at all. Unless from chicken shit.

So when you go out into the yard and 9-o'clock possum is sitting there making himself fat(ter) on Layena and all you really want to do is go and shut the chicken coop so you can go to sleep and not worry about another raccoon massacre and you don't want to wait up because your allergies are KILLING you, what you do is you grab the window screen up against the fake Adirondack chair and you point it at 9-o'clock possum, who looks at you and (seemingly) thoughtfully masticates.

And when he doesn't move after you've pointed the screen at him menacingly, you sort of advance the edge of that window screen towards him in an 'ONWARD, POSSUM!' gesture, hoping that he will shuffle off under the rose bush like he usually does. But no, tonight he is resolute. He will NOT leave the Layena, and he is NOT casually offended by your presence. Tonight he is standing his ground and he latches on to the window screen with his FREAKISHLY LARGE lower mandible and he TUGS AT IT only it's not cute like it would be if it was a labrador puppy.

So you're not really sure what to do, so you drop the screen and you walk in a huge, huge circle around 9-o'clock possum and lock up the chicken coop and grab a rake and crab-walk back to the back door wondering if you're going to have your pants chewed off.

That's when you start thinking about the rhyming of possum and awesome and, though you acknowledge that this isn't exactly the sort of occasion that would change MOST people's meanings of words like 'awesome,' you decide that it's interesting enough that from this point forward you'll choose not to quibble over specific people's understandings of hyperbolic words, and you'll certainly choose not to do it publicly.
posted by mudpuppie at 10:36 PM on April 12, 2011 [26 favorites]

You can have my 'awesome' when you pry it out of my cold dead hands. And if you do, I'll bring back 'tubular', non-ironically. Slang prescriptivism is doubleplus ungood and should be stomped on sight.
posted by immlass at 10:39 PM on April 12, 2011

my experience of possums is that they are flat and sleep in the road a lot
posted by pyramid termite at 10:45 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

Station.
posted by Barry B. Palindromer at 10:50 PM on April 12, 2011

I dislike bananas but am very fond of beans. Is it okay if I say "cool beans"?
posted by Neofelis at 10:53 PM on April 12, 2011

mudpuppie, I wish I could favorite that a hundred times....

..in other words, awesome.
posted by lumpenprole at 10:54 PM on April 12, 2011 [1 favorite]

That balances me out then, because I have a negative reaction to almost every syllable of it.
posted by BeerFilter at 10:56 PM on April 12, 2011

You know, let me apologize. I didn't mean to sound THAT horrible. I just find possums to be revolting creatures and I hate them. Hugs to all. Sorry, mudpuppie.
posted by BeerFilter at 11:04 PM on April 12, 2011

Whoa, no "rad" yet! Rad.
posted by unknowncommand at 11:22 PM on April 12, 2011

in a closed ballot, I would choose:

awe inspiring __ X
awesome __


Doesn't awesome just mean big?
posted by philip-random at 11:23 PM on April 12, 2011

I use 'awesome' all the time. Possibly too much.

I also use/have used:

sick
wicked
fierce
grouse
outstanding
def
boss
fresh
off-tap

Don't ban the awesome.
posted by bdave at 11:30 PM on April 12, 2011

Tubular

Rad

STATION!

Awesome Gold.
posted by bdave at 11:34 PM on April 12, 2011

Moist Von Lipwig

He looks like a cross between Mr. Moneybags and Mac Tonight from the McDonalds commercials.
posted by mintcake! at 11:35 PM on April 12, 2011

For a long time I've run a lonely campaign to revive "splendid". Won't you join me?
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 11:43 PM on April 12, 2011 [3 favorites]

Look, as long as we're doing this, let's do it right this time and choose a word that won't be co-opted by advertising and bad sit-coms. Like, Wow! That's scrotum sauce! Or Woohoo! Bright red vulva! or Yes! Anal snap!

I think you'll all agree, we need to be smart from the very beginning.
posted by taz at 1:31 AM on April 13, 2011 [4 favorites]

So many posts, so little "wizard!". We even got a Darth Vader reference.
posted by lantius at 1:49 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

fivesavagepalms, on something as trivial as this do you need to create a post and dip your oar? Some things aren't worth the bother.
posted by MuffinMan at 2:38 AM on April 13, 2011

As far as pukka and dubba go...

I have a hard time thinking of the use of pukka in English. It's a run-of-the-mill word in Urdu, used to denote anything solid (e.g. to describe a friendship, someone's craftsmanship, an adhesive seal). When I see it in English, it makes me think of horrible stereotypes of Englishmen during the Raj.

Dubba (interesting that it's the same word in Tamil) is also 'box' in Urdu. As slang for stupid, it's not so common in Pakistan, although I have heard a lot of Urdu-speaking Indians using it. I think it may come from comparing an idiot's head to a box, rather than a brain, and then moved on to a generic "anything stupid."
posted by bardophile at 2:46 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]

I have a hard time thinking of the use of pukka in English.
Hinglish, innit.

Anyway, this callout was well weapon.

-----------------
Sent from my Wasp T12 Speechtool
posted by SyntacticSugar at 3:27 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]

Also, copacetic.
posted by SyntacticSugar at 3:28 AM on April 13, 2011

I probably say 'marvellous' a little too often. But in my defence, I have the accent for it.

'Splendid' is also a good choice, but not a word an American should probably use.

My favourite expression by far, however, is 'Isn't that a pip?', as recently rescued from obscurity by the writers of In The Night Garden.
posted by le morte de bea arthur at 3:34 AM on April 13, 2011

Aren't you tired of "awesome"?

No, I'm tired of Lady Gaga.
posted by Decani at 3:45 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

I'm perfectly fine with awesome. As long as it isn't prefaced by hella.
posted by brundlefly at 3:52 AM on April 13, 2011

perhaps it is awesomeness itself which is being railed against here, and not its appropriate descriptor, awesome. sour crabbuckit motherfuckers.

and while we're at it, why has everyone got a problem with the word fighty? i think it's great. boss. ace. top drawer. mayhaps even a touch of awesome sprinkled within.
posted by molecicco at 4:32 AM on April 13, 2011

I'll let Spicoli handle this call-out.
posted by NoMich at 4:35 AM on April 13, 2011

This is so fetch.
posted by inturnaround at 4:51 AM on April 13, 2011

Command-F "amazeballs".

Ah. Covered.
posted by running order squabble fest at 5:03 AM on April 13, 2011

Honest, I meant to propose no ban. The headline, "Dump 'awesome'" should have had a question mark.

I know language evolves, folks. I'm not the fussy self-appointed keeper of linguistic purity some seem to think I am. I'm merely suggesting we consider evolving "awesome" out of the foreground, as it is now striking my (poor, sensitive) ear as a mindless cliche, like. But just because I find it tiresome is no reason for you to stop using it if you like it.

I guess I poked the hornet's nest with this trivial query (I agree it's trivial).

It's been awesome to experience the disapproval of a community I respect.
posted by fivesavagepalms at 5:44 AM on April 13, 2011 [4 favorites]

I guess you're not a big fan of this site.
You could always use this Firefox add-on and use your own list of substitute superlatives.
posted by SyntacticSugar at 5:54 AM on April 13, 2011

No. I'd vote for hater as being much worse.
posted by juiceCake at 6:05 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

This thread kinda rocks actually. Sorry if it was a pain for you to read, fivesavagepalms, but I rather enjoyed it. So thanks to one and allsome.
posted by Dano St at 6:17 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Sweet - now that that's settled, can we get rid of "lame" as all-purpose pejorative? Awesome.
posted by jtron at 6:19 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

My thoughts on the subject lies somewhere in the neighborhood of Jessaymn's and Bitter Old Punk's. The development was named "Fuck this tedious shit, there are more awesome things in the world than you can possibly imagine Estates" in 1964 and has consistently grown over the years.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:26 AM on April 13, 2011

I enjoyed it too.
posted by fivesavagepalms at 6:26 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Does fivesavagepalms have sixcolors or...or something. lame lame lame
posted by adamvasco at 6:35 AM on April 13, 2011

Awesome's not half as irritating as "y'all".
posted by joannemullen at 6:42 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Awesome's not half as irritating as "y'all".

Bless your heart...
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 6:44 AM on April 13, 2011 [15 favorites]

Awesome's not half as irritating as "y'all".

That is so, so wrong, that it belongs in an envelope marked "wrong" placed in the drawer marked "wrong" in the office with "wrong" written on the door located at the Department of Wrongness on Wrong Street in Wrong City.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:46 AM on April 13, 2011 [17 favorites]

Y'all.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:46 AM on April 13, 2011 [3 favorites]

if there's a better second person plural in English I don't know it.
also a weekend doing bondage with a new kitten sounds perfectly wholesome and fun
The safe word is 'meow'
posted by jtron at 6:51 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]

if there's a better second person plural in English I don't know it.

Youse? Yinz? Nope, Y'all are going to have to stick with y'all.
posted by Rock Steady at 6:53 AM on April 13, 2011

joanne, this is as good a place as any to ask this question.

If you despise the people on this site as much as it appears you do, since a considerable proportion of your contributions thus far have been passive-aggressive swipes at its members, why in the hell are you here?
posted by winna at 7:06 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

True 'y'all' story: In my senior year of college, I joined the Asian Term at my school, which consisted of roughly 80 students and 5 professors travelling for three months through Japan, Taiwan, Hong Kong, and China. It was a fantastic time, and I can honestly say it changed my life. However, because of the travel and issues with visas, unlike the other terms (South America and Europe) we weren't really able to have the week long free break that the other terms got. Instead, we got to spend our last couple days in Hawaii, which was pretty nice, too. One of the things we did was go to Pearl Harbor and the Arizona memorial. One of the students had an uncle in the Navy, so we managed to get a behind the scenes tour of the base. We all piled onto yellow school buses, already feeling like, hey, yellow school bus, we're pretty much home, and starting to really finally feel relaxed in the way you do when you get home.

Then the lieutenant giving us the tour picks up the microphone and says "Ah heard y'all went ta heerousheemah. Ah'd be maighty glad ta hear 'bout that." At "y'all", all tension left my body, and I realized, hey, I'm back in the States. It was a pretty solid welcome home, and I'm not from anywhere that y'all is actually used. So, yeah, y'all is pretty damn awesome in my book.
posted by Ghidorah at 7:11 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

a considerable proportion of your contributions thus far have been passive-aggressive swipes at its members

Passive aggressive? Ha! This, from joanne's profile, ain't exactly what you'd call "passive":

Occupation: Typing crap for idiots, so I'll fit in just fine here.

We love you too, dear!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:11 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

I grew up saying y'all, down in deepest Alabama. Y'all is gender-neutral (it so beats "you guys" that it ain't even funny) and it rolls off the tongue nice and easy. Plus it's just one syllable: the perfect word when you're in a hurry! Y'all is good. And if y'all is being embraced by Americans from all around, then I'm just real happy about that. It's only a matter of time before the British, the Aussies, the Kiwis etc. catch on.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:19 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

I just had an awesome dump.
posted by Burhanistan at 7:22 AM on April 13, 2011

I know language evolves, folks. I'm not the fussy self-appointed keeper of linguistic purity some seem to think I am. I'm merely suggesting we consider evolving "awesome" out of the foreground

I dig it, fivesavagepalms, but to account for the reaction you have to think through the practicability of the request: there's no way to get "us" to collectively stop preferring a random fairly common and ideologically neutral word when "we" are a great big group of people who in general love to disagree with each other and who don't come to our respective vocabularies by committee in the first place.

So "can you all just abruptly and independently decide to change this habit now that I've mentioned it" is a non-starter. So then, someone thinks, what is this Metatalk for, since that's obviously not something someone would reasonably be asking?

And so people reassess, and think, "okay, so it's really functionally a request that people agree collectively to make this change?" And the answer there is still likely to be no, but this time with a collective tinge of "and who do you think you are to try and ask us to do that?" And so we end up here with people reacting to what may not have been your intent but what is, functionally, tied up irremovably to any Metatalk post suggesting the demotion or elimination of a piece of vocabulary: if you're not asking people in this community to make a change, why are you starting a thread on Metatalk to specifically put it out there that you don't like this and want to see less of it?

To be clear, I'm explaining at length just to try and make it clear why what you may have expected isn't what you got. None of this is a big deal, it turned into a chatty fun thread where people have had a good time peeving about and/or fawning over bits of language, and while I can't suggest you repeat the exercise there's no harm done in sort of bumbling a little bit with the presentation here. The big takeaway is that when you stand up in front of Metatalk to propose a change, you need to think through the why and how of the community evaluating that proposal or you may be pretty surprised; if you're not actually proposing a change, you need to think pretty hard about why you're standing up in the first place and saying something that involves changing something.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:27 AM on April 13, 2011 [3 favorites]

Metafilter: Y'all is good.
posted by owtytrof at 7:28 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Dump is pretty awesome
posted by jtron at 7:28 AM on April 13, 2011

y'all is not half as irritating as irritated, I guess. I guess is also irritating. Heck, if I think of it, almost everything is irritating, especially if you can't see the genuine apologetic smile.

(heck is also awesome, no, darn, irritating. Ap o lo getic is just plain weird. Weird is weird too. Genuine Guniea pig smile is even weirder. And so on. Pie or beans??)
posted by Namlit at 7:29 AM on April 13, 2011

I grew up in Texas (the spacey part, not the cowboy part) but "y'all" never made it into my common vocabulary. It's a perfectly fine term, though.
posted by Burhanistan at 7:31 AM on April 13, 2011

Spacey as in Space or spacey as in hippie?

Or Spacey as in Kevin?
posted by The Whelk at 7:32 AM on April 13, 2011

Yes!
posted by Burhanistan at 7:35 AM on April 13, 2011

Antipants.
posted by Sys Rq at 7:41 AM on April 13, 2011

(the spacey part,

Space is the place.

not the cowboy part)

Don't let your babies...
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:43 AM on April 13, 2011

Space Party.
posted by The Whelk at 7:44 AM on April 13, 2011

Space Still A Place
posted by The Whelk at 7:46 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Is there where I register my request to reestablish "Face!" as the ultimate cut down? (and I'd like to specify that Face! is always in italics)
posted by Eumachia L F at 7:47 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Well, that does it. I'm just going to breakdance the rest of the morning.
posted by Burhanistan at 7:48 AM on April 13, 2011

on Wrong Street in Wrong City

This is a suburb of Wrong Kong.
posted by MuffinMan at 7:48 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

I just had an awesome dump

DUDE ME TOO
posted by Existential Dread at 7:55 AM on April 13, 2011

Kevin Spacey's Cowboy Part
Ass Awesome Ass
PLANTERS® NUTrition™
Ambrosia Salad Recipe
posted by Dano St at 8:02 AM on April 13, 2011

"Youse? Yinz? Nope, Y'all are going to have to stick with y'all."

In the interest of Southern grammar, it's that "All y'all are gonna have to stick with y'all."
posted by klangklangston at 8:05 AM on April 13, 2011 [3 favorites]

Well, no, I don't think so. I'm struggling to to put a rule to it, but "all y'all" is usually reserved for much more belligerent and/or emphatic statements... Something along the lines of "I'm gonna beat all y'all's asses."
posted by taz at 8:19 AM on April 13, 2011

I love "all y'all." Efficient grammar at its finest. One of my favorite things about moving to Texas has been the language pack.

Stop saying awesome? No Sir, that dog won't hunt.
posted by *s at 8:19 AM on April 13, 2011 [3 favorites]

Awesome's not half as irritating as "y'all".

I'd already noticed a bunch of shitty comments but this really crosses the line. "Y'all" is fucking awesome, and fulfills a necessary disambiguation function in English.

Now, people who misspell it as "ya'll"... ugh. Drives me up the wall.
posted by kmz at 8:28 AM on April 13, 2011

> One of my favorite things about moving to Texas has been the language pack.

I will admit to being a regular user of the term "I'm fixin' to [do that thing]".
posted by Burhanistan at 8:29 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

What are these awesome feelings that we're feeling?
posted by rollbiz at 8:31 AM on April 13, 2011

Ron Weasley says "wicked"

Clearly, Ron Weasley is secretly from Rhode Island.

(Also: I apparently say "awesome" with great frequency, which I didn't even realize until I heard my Portuguese mother in law start saying "awesome" after spending a week in my presence. I'm a bad influence.)
posted by sonika at 8:32 AM on April 13, 2011

> The big takeaway is that when you stand up in front of Metatalk to propose a change, you need to think through the why and how of the community evaluating that proposal or you may be pretty surprised; if you're not actually proposing a change, you need to think pretty hard about why you're standing up in the first place and saying something that involves changing something.

Surely you could have saved yourself some typing by simply linking to the flowchart.
posted by languagehat at 8:33 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

"I will admit to being a regular user of the term "I'm fixin' to [do that thing]"."

Also nice, "been fixin t' [do that thing]."

"i>Well, no, I don't think so. I'm struggling to to put a rule to it, but "all y'all" is usually reserved for much more belligerent and/or emphatic statements... Something along the lines of "I'm gonna beat all y'all's asses.""

Nah, "all y'all" means that everyone in the "y'all" group is being addressed; contrast with "some a y'all."

This is one of the things that justified my linguistics 101 class!
posted by klangklangston at 8:36 AM on April 13, 2011

Obligatory : "Like a hundred billion hotdogs..."
posted by sodium lights the horizon at 8:44 AM on April 13, 2011

But in natural language one doesn't always specify that they aren't just talking to some of the group, right? At any rate, I lived in the south from the age of 8 'til my mid-30s (North Carolina, Florida, South Carolina, Georgia, Texas, and Louisiana) and in my experience, "All Y'all" wasn't the ordinary way of addressing a group, unless there was some question that it might not apply to the whole group, or if someone was pissed off, or emphasizing something (like, "No Exceptions!! All Y'all!!).
posted by taz at 8:44 AM on April 13, 2011

Cortex, I never suggested anyone agree collectively to make a change in their language, for cryin' out loud. I'm not that dumb, although from some of the semi-personal comments in this thread, some don't believe it. I'm just mildly suggesting that awesome has become trite and overused and I'm finding it tiresome and lazy and wonder if anyone else does, and if they do, then maybe they'll choose, as individuals, to use the word less.
I don't try to herd cats.
My fault here, though; I failed to make my light-hearted intentions clear enough.
posted by fivesavagepalms at 8:45 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

I mean, I don't try to herd cats, y'all.
posted by fivesavagepalms at 8:46 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Future: I's a-fixin' to _______.
Present: I's a-_______in'.
Past: I done _______ed.
posted by Sys Rq at 8:46 AM on April 13, 2011 [3 favorites]

I wish people at the office would stop using the phrase "herding cats".
posted by Burhanistan at 8:47 AM on April 13, 2011

I'm just mildly suggesting that awesome has become trite and overused and I'm finding it tiresome and lazy and wonder if anyone else does, and if they do, then maybe they'll choose, as individuals, to use the word less.

Seems to me those of y'all who are already tired of awesome would stop using it of your own accord. No prompting required.

At least, I rarely find myself saying, to myself, "Self, this slang word or phrase you've been using is totes played out and it'd be really awesome if you weren't forced to keep using that shiz."
posted by owtytrof at 8:55 AM on April 13, 2011

My thoughts on yaoi:

I don't have any feeling one way or another about the casual use of awesome. But I am a little bit sad that it's meaning has been downgraded from awe-inspiring to great. I feel the same way about the change in the meaning of awful. Because living in a world that has so much awe you need a words for inspiring awe and filled with awe sounds kinda cool.

Also, is kinda acceptable for 'kind of' Is it at the level of 'alright' or at the level of 'for all intensive purposes'?

Anyone else ever get into a flame war about 'soda' vs 'pop' vs 'coke'? Because seriously? Coke? What the fuck? That makes no sense people.

I still hate totes.

I find "y'all" very grating. But "all y'all" is awesome.
posted by nooneyouknow at 9:07 AM on April 13, 2011

I'll fully admit that I haven't read this whole thread. I jumped here from a comment on the sidebar that had 12 favorites.

I gave you the 12th favorite. You keep that in mind, awesomepossum.
posted by Mister Fabulous at 9:13 AM on April 13, 2011

I was born and raised in North Carolina, and you better believe I say y'all. As a white American of indistinct ancestry with a pair of fairly rootless parents, I, in an effort to Have Roots, cling to whatever small traces of Southern identity I feel I can legitimately claim. Hey, it's better than digging back 200 years and then saying "Oh I'm Czech." No, I'm not Czech, I'm a North Carolinian and I'll say y'all all I want, damn it.
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:15 AM on April 13, 2011

My thoughts on yaoi:

Why is that even IN the autocorrect database?
posted by The Whelk at 9:15 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

My thoughts on yaoi.
posted by kmz at 9:25 AM on April 13, 2011

I was about to say, "hey, fellow fandom_wank reader", but it seems the phrase has gone more Internet mainstream.
posted by kmz at 9:29 AM on April 13, 2011

While everyone's in a vocab-changing mood, can I propose snash as a replacement for grar? As in "Mefites are pure giein me snash cause I declawed my cat".
posted by Dim Siawns at 9:32 AM on April 13, 2011

Hey, fellow fandom_wank reader. I used to lurk all the time on f_w and was reading it when that post happened. But I haven't read it much in the last year or so.
posted by nooneyouknow at 9:50 AM on April 13, 2011

I GUESS WE JUST GOT TOLD.
posted by infinitywaltz at 10:00 AM on April 13, 2011

Might I suggest monkey's eyebrows... for everything.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 10:03 AM on April 13, 2011

Possum does not rhyme with awesome.
Try foursome instead.

But I haven't even tried a threesome yet...
posted by PeterMcDermott at 10:22 AM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Awesome is cool, but it's not as epic as groovy. Groovy totally rocks.
posted by MexicanYenta at 10:27 AM on April 13, 2011

I think it's fustian.
posted by longbaugh at 10:33 AM on April 13, 2011

So, every time I use the word awesome, do I have to link to this awesome post?
posted by theora55 at 10:36 AM on April 13, 2011

I say 'tits'. Last night, I let this slip to my 13 year old son, "You are so tits." That was not valet. Nor Cool Beans. Nor copacetic. Nor something that rhymes with Opossum.
posted by psylosyren at 10:48 AM on April 13, 2011

I say 'tits'. Last night, I let this slip to my 13 year old son, "You are so tits." That was not valet. Nor Cool Beans. Nor copacetic. Nor something that rhymes with Opossum

That's hilarious! How did your son respond?
posted by codacorolla at 11:05 AM on April 13, 2011

maybe they'll choose, as individuals, to use the word less

Even less than I care for admonitions, to a group of tens of thousands of members, to change their manner of speaking, do I care to be told "as [an] individual" what words I am using too often for your taste.

I've now read a couple of attempts that you've made to disavow what would seem to be the obvious interpretation of your original post, but the alternative proposed here, that you're speaking to individuals, is even more obnoxious, not least because there are ways to communicate with individuals that don't involve being "overheard" by thousands of others.

If addressing individuals isn't your intention after all, then this post amounts to not much more than venting a personal gripe of yours. I don't see it as a site issue in that case. I mean, I don't care for the road construction that's going on along my route to work right now, but I'm not about to make a post about it.
posted by Ipsifendus at 11:18 AM on April 13, 2011

I'm going to start using awesome MORE, just because I know someone hates it.
posted by 23skidoo at 11:28 AM on April 13, 2011

As an individual I choose to never use the term, dump pump except in certain contexts, which I'm never involved in nor seek to be involved in anyway.
posted by juiceCake at 11:29 AM on April 13, 2011

I'm going to start using awesome MORE, just because I know someone hates it.

This was my initial reaction, but since reading mudpuppie's comment, I think I'm going to replace awesome with ONWARD, POSSUM!
posted by grapesaresour at 11:48 AM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]

Is it too late to claim Nine o'Clock Possum as my new band name?
posted by shakespeherian at 12:08 PM on April 13, 2011

When I was in 1st grade, my friends and I were convinced, for some reason, that the word "decent" was a synonym for "awesome," "excellent," or other superlatives. We went around for at least a year exclaiming "decent!" whenever something was awesome. I guess I could have put that in the "you were doing it wrong" AskMe thread. But instead, I propose a return to that erroneous linguistic convention.

I think it would be decent if we could stop using the word "awesome." Most decent, indeed.
posted by The World Famous at 12:17 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

That's totally nominal, man.
posted by Burhanistan at 12:18 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

That makes some weird sense of memory stir for me, The World Famous. I think I may have had a "decent!" phase as at some point as well.
posted by cortex (staff) at 12:21 PM on April 13, 2011

I think it would be decent if we could stop using the word "awesome."

Totally decent, I must say. That would be completely mental.
posted by octobersurprise at 12:23 PM on April 13, 2011

Oddly, my 1st grade misuse of "decent" predated Martin Short's Ed Grimley by several years. Moreover, Martin Short's use of the term in the Grimley role was actually a correct, if comical, usage, rather than a substitute for "awesome." I wish I could claim to have been riffing on Martin Short when I was 6 or 7. But, alas, I cannot.
posted by The World Famous at 12:27 PM on April 13, 2011

I hereby swear to replace "awesome" with "I'd hit it" from now on.

Sorry, jessamyn, I'm left with little choice.
posted by 2or3whiskeysodas at 12:34 PM on April 13, 2011

Totally decent or totally awesome?! Ed Grimley and Jesse Jackson.
posted by octobersurprise at 12:35 PM on April 13, 2011

Sorry, jessamyn, I'm left with little choice.

Your lack of creative thinking is not my concern.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 12:43 PM on April 13, 2011 [3 favorites]

Full of stars
Raucous
Brazen
Keenbean
The ginchiest
Mind-altering
Lustrous
Effulgent
Puckering
Strudelicious
...
Awesome?
posted by Kafkaesque at 1:06 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

>>Sorry, jessamyn, I'm left with little choice.

>Your lack of creative thinking is not my concern.

There's a pun to be made here about thinking outside of a certain something. I won't say what that something is, but I can tell you it's a popular mode of delivery.
posted by Sys Rq at 1:08 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

The Dump record jtron references above is totally worth a spin.
posted by safetyfork at 1:22 PM on April 13, 2011

I'd like to thank all the contributors to this thread who made a long, desperate wait at a remote airport go a little bit quicker. I'm sure my employers will be happy to reimburse me for the PPV Internet Machine, right?

You're awesome.
posted by tigrefacile at 1:24 PM on April 13, 2011

Thinking outside the suppository?
posted by SpiffyRob at 1:25 PM on April 13, 2011

Thinking outside the miniaturised submarine injected into a human body?
posted by running order squabble fest at 1:49 PM on April 13, 2011

Thinking outside of the hoohaa.
posted by Burhanistan at 1:53 PM on April 13, 2011

'Thinking outside'. What is the thing that many MeFites would be better to do more of?
posted by dg at 2:25 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Possum does not rhyme with awesome.

Sure it does, but then I say ooot and aboot too.

When I say awesome I think of Keanu wearing bermuda shorts. With that awful image in my head it doesn't prevent the word from passing my lips even though way back when it would have made me the target of mockery.
posted by squeak at 2:43 PM on April 13, 2011

Does anyone have a hella awesome recipe for beans?
posted by entropicamericana at 2:45 PM on April 13, 2011

No, because beans are grody.
posted by rhizome at 3:00 PM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]

There's a pun to be made here about thinking outside of a certain something. I won't say what that something is, but I can tell you it's a popular mode of delivery.

Thinking outside of Santa's sleigh?
posted by amyms at 3:11 PM on April 13, 2011

Thinking outside Amazon.com.
posted by cortex (staff) at 3:23 PM on April 13, 2011

Thinking outside The Patch
posted by found missing at 3:27 PM on April 13, 2011

The Mighty Librarians of Texas. Hmmm. *begins penning awesome tale*
posted by neuromodulator at 3:28 PM on April 13, 2011

Someday I am going to make up a list of the things people have requested others not do anymore. Seriously. It'd be like 14 pages long.

I wish people wouldn't do this.
posted by Splunge at 3:42 PM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]

Thinking outside the miniaturised submarine injected into a human body?

That's not so much a delivery method as it is a way to get Thom Yorke to dance.
posted by The World Famous at 3:46 PM on April 13, 2011

"All Y'all" wasn't the ordinary way of addressing a group, unless there was some question that it might not apply to the whole group, or if someone was pissed off, or emphasizing something (like, "No Exceptions!! All Y'all!!).

Just in case anyone's adding up anecdotal data points on the "y'all" and "all y'all" variations, I agree with taz's take on it. One side of my in-laws' family has deep southern roots and they of course use "y'all" regularly, but the only time I've ever heard them use "all y'all" was when they wanted to not only address the whole group, but address the whole group with EMPHASIS (e.g. "ALL Y'ALL can kiss my ass!"). It works best when storming away from Christmas dinner.
posted by amyms at 3:50 PM on April 13, 2011 [3 favorites]

Native Texan weighing in on "all y'all": "y'all" is a group. "All y'all", as in 'every last of one y'all', can be contrasted to "some a y'all", but "all y'all" is primarily groups of groups: "y'all by the door and y'all by the window, all y'all go outside now". The former usage is more likely to be emphatic than the latter. But "all y'all" isn't for addressing a single group unless you're ready to tell them to kiss your ass, or you can't address every one of them by first and middle name in the way that strikes terror into a young(er) person's heart: "John Robert, you better get your ass back in here and finish Christmas dinner or I'm fixin t'come after you!".

Y'all know what I mean, especially y'all whose families come out of east Texas.
posted by immlass at 4:04 PM on April 13, 2011 [5 favorites]

I find the difference between "you," "y'all," and "all y'all" are often really useful in internet discussions, when giving people an excuse to think you might not be addressing them directly is the difference between a pleasant resolution and a 400-comment flameout.

(Plus, sounding southern makes people underestimate your intelligence, which can be dreadfully useful.)
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 4:20 PM on April 13, 2011

(Plus, sounding southern makes people underestimate your intelligence, which can be dreadfully useful.)

My fake southern accent is not good enough to fool anyone, so I just make illogical or flat-out stupid comments sometimes, just to make sure people underestimate my intelligence.
posted by The World Famous at 4:27 PM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]

Perſonally, I prefer þou and ye, eſpecially when þey are uſed by ſoutherners.
posted by Sys Rq at 4:32 PM on April 13, 2011

You'd love this, then.
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 4:38 PM on April 13, 2011

Awesome rhymes with possum.
I've started saying y'all despite being a Northerner just to confuse people. And because its handy. I hear 'youse' a bit in Aus.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 4:40 PM on April 13, 2011

For most of my life, I have said "danke" and "excusez moi" despite being neither German nor French. Weird little teenage affectation that just stuck to the point where I'll probably be doing it until the day I die.
posted by cortex (staff) at 4:45 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

For most of my life, I have said "danke"

Years ago, when I first learned the German "danke schön", I thought of the words "donkey shine", and have been saying "donkey shine" ever since, often in an exaggeratedly thick southern accent, which seems to suit the phrase. It still perplexes my 10-year-old daughter, but she's come to grudgingly accept it as simply another strange practice of her old man's.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 5:06 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Years ago, when I first learned the German "danke schön", I thought of the words "donkey shine",

If you want to further confuse your daughter, this works in French with "mercy buckets" for "merci beaucoup."

I know this because it's one of those weird affectations of my mom's.
posted by sonika at 5:18 PM on April 13, 2011

I will say "grazie" unthinkingly as thank you or even "millie grazie" despite that being the sum total of my working Italian.

I have no idea why either. I know Latin better then I know Italian but I'm not going around saying Gratias and greeting people with Salve!
posted by The Whelk at 5:25 PM on April 13, 2011

Ah yes, "mercy buckets", I've heard that!

Another one, for the Japanese "do itashimashite" ("you're welcome") is "don't touch my moustache". That one was immortalized in Toy Story 2, when Al of Al's Toy Barn said it (over the phone) to the Japanese toy museum director who was negotiating to buy Al's complete Woody's Roundup set.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 5:28 PM on April 13, 2011

STUPID BRAIN WHY DO RECALL HIGH SCHOOL LATIN BUT CAN'T GET FRENCH INTO YOUR HEAD? GAH I HATE YOU
posted by The Whelk at 5:28 PM on April 13, 2011

Yeah, you know, "grazie", when intoned with that lovely Italian accent, it just sounds like a heartfelt thank you. So lovely.

But Whelk, it's "mille", not "millie". Just in the interest of correctly speaking a language you don't speak.

And that's important!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 5:47 PM on April 13, 2011

Although, I guess it works at Balducci's...
posted by flapjax at midnite at 5:52 PM on April 13, 2011

My thrug is so squcked by the enormity of this thread that all I can whupple is geep.
posted by flabdablet at 6:05 PM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]

I hear 'youse' a bit in Aus
Word of warning - using 'youse' will lead to you immediately being branded as an illiterate yobbo. Just. Don't.
posted by dg at 6:19 PM on April 13, 2011 [2 favorites]

The yanks in POW camps through out germany played the "Donkey shit" routine with a smile when those guards would try and teach german....ahhh those were the days. Kinch had a radio in the coffee pot.
posted by clavdivs at 6:24 PM on April 13, 2011

"yobbo" is a good one.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:27 PM on April 13, 2011

There's a dictionary full of words we could be using
We could be winning, friends, and yet we're always losing
We putter down the highway, when we could be cruising
Through that dictionary full of words we should be using
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:30 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Possum does not rhyme with awesome.

Agreed. 'Awesome' rhymes with 'Pour Some', and both are acceptable responses to the statement 'Let's have another drink!'

Possum, on the other hand, rhymes with blossom, and both are acceptable answers to the question 'For dinner, do you want marsupial or 80's sit-com character?'
posted by Sparx at 6:43 PM on April 13, 2011

'Mercy buckets' was in Better Off Dead.
posted by tomboko at 7:37 PM on April 13, 2011

Possums Ate My Blossoms?
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:03 PM on April 13, 2011

"Awesome" has been background noise to me since 2009, but if y'all could strangle "does what it says on the tin" on sight starting five minutes ago I'd be mad thankful.
posted by furiousthought at 8:17 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

I just came here to say that. Who buys things in tins, anyway? And when was the last time a product told you what it was going to do on the packaging? Seriously, what an annoying phrase.
posted by koeselitz at 9:07 PM on April 13, 2011

"Y'all" is the group as a whole. "All y'all" is individually addressing each member of the group. Example:

"We gon' kick y'all's asses" means "I expect that my preferred sports team will defeat your preferred sports team in the upcoming match".

Whereas:

"We gon' kick all y'all's asses" means "My friends and I are about to subject each one of you to grievous bodily harm."
posted by BitterOldPunk at 9:08 PM on April 13, 2011 [7 favorites]

I am pleased to note that no one else here has mentioned my stock emphatic descriptor of choice, as I fear being reduced to a caricature (hint: it's less than 5 ppm, and it's not "nebraska").

I spent about 8 months in Australia fifteen years ago, and find that a number of expressions still linger in my vocabulary. Not as much so as when I first returned, but "ring" instead of "call" still pops up; "you're right" when someone says "excuse me" after bumping you on the bus - it's funny how it all kinda lingers.
posted by nickmark at 9:32 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]

Ah yes, that reminds me: gon'. Another excellent word. Occasionally spelled "gonh".
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:33 PM on April 13, 2011

nickmark: true blue? dinky di?
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 9:38 PM on April 13, 2011

Fair go.
posted by nickmark at 10:11 PM on April 13, 2011

How else are we supposed to describe Jessamyn?
posted by 1000monkeys at 11:06 PM on April 13, 2011

The Ten Million Names Of Mods.
posted by The Whelk at 11:12 PM on April 13, 2011

I say awesome way too often. That said, in a business context, I hear people who are supposed to be grown ups use "excellent" a lot as a "grown up" (or whatever we're supposed to be now) substitution and use it way too often in exactly the same way. As if saying "excellent" instead of "awesome" is somehow more mature or sophisticated or something.

Between the two, I'm just going to stick with awesome because a.) it's awesome, b.) if I say 'excellent' it usually ends up cringingly sounding like Bill & Ted (and then I want to append, "dude") or I say it & then promptly need to steeple my fingers evilly like Mr. Burns (and append with "Smithers"). And anytime anyone says it, I think of them doing one of those two things. Awesome is at least generically 12-year-old to me rather than associated with specific characters.
posted by susanbeeswax at 11:32 PM on April 13, 2011

Holy crap. It's been 5 years since I asked about awesome.

Bogus.

Upside is, all y'all looking for a replacement can try on "Hullaballoo!"
posted by team lowkey at 12:28 AM on April 14, 2011

"Hullaballoo" is pants.
posted by flabdablet at 2:13 AM on April 14, 2011

NoMich: "Spicoli"

Exactly, you have to say it like Spicoli.

So if you hate the word, take a few hits of the X, say it, and you'll be fine.
posted by bwg at 6:45 AM on April 14, 2011

coochie
thats all I'm saying.
posted by clavdivs at 8:26 AM on April 14, 2011

You're Charro?
posted by The Whelk at 8:37 AM on April 14, 2011

"We are all Charro."
posted by entropicamericana at 9:48 AM on April 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

I'm just thinking about a clip I saw of David Tennant at Comic-Con a couple years ago, introducing a screening of one of the Doctor Who specials -- he was yammering about the episode, winding the crowd up, and then said "and it's gonna be fantastic!....Or as you folk say, it's gonna be AWE-some!...Heh, I love Americans, how you say 'pre-MIERE' instead of 'PREM-miere', and how you AWE-some. That's it, I'm taking AWE-some back to London with me."

So, we could just give all our "awesome" to David Tennant.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:22 AM on April 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

So, we could just give all our "awesome" to David Tennant.

Nah, he's already got plenty.
posted by Rock Steady at 2:46 PM on April 14, 2011 [3 favorites]

If y'all are looking for an opposite to awesome, I just ran across the word suctorial, defined as "adapted for sucking."
posted by languagehat at 3:00 PM on April 14, 2011 [2 favorites]

suctorial

Not to be confused with Sucktorial, which is a trade name owned by the New York Times.
posted by The World Famous at 3:36 PM on April 14, 2011

Bold.
posted by santaslittlehelper at 5:33 PM on April 14, 2011

I'm going to be sticking with Super Cool.
posted by taz at 11:04 PM on April 14, 2011

Heh, I love Americans, how you say 'pre-MIERE' instead of 'PREM-miere'

It's always struck me as odd that the British, despite their intimate proximity to France, manage to butcher the French language at every given opportunity.

Shall I assume it's done purely out of spite?

Not to say that Americans are much better at it, mind you -- pree-MEER is pretty awful -- but at least they manage the basic task of emphasizing the correct syllable. (Hint: When in doubt, go with the last one.)
posted by Sys Rq at 11:21 PM on April 14, 2011 [1 favorite]

It's always struck me as odd that the British, despite their intimate proximity to France, manage to butcher the French language at every given opportunity.

You are too kind. Have you ever heard British newscasters trying to pronounce Spanish names?
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 12:03 AM on April 15, 2011 [1 favorite]

Just every four years.
posted by Sys Rq at 12:09 AM on April 15, 2011

You are too kind. Have you ever heard British newscasters trying to pronounce Spanish names?

Not to mention Japanese. Asakusa (ah-sah-koo-sah) becomes "ass-ah-kyoo-sah". And that's ass as in "kiss my".
posted by flapjax at midnite at 5:34 AM on April 15, 2011 [1 favorite]

Have you ever heard British newscasters trying to pronounce Spanish names?

Watching some excellent/bad British comedy from the 50's, the hostess was heard to comment to her guests -- "We're having Marg-wear-itas! A lovely blend of lemon juice, triple sec and teh-kwill-a!"

Of course, it's bad in Texas, too. The Guadalupe river has been so twisted that even by the 1830's it was so mis-pronounced that I've seen a semi-literate Texican's journal in which he phonetically spelled it "the War-loop" river. To this day, if you pronounce the e, you reveal yourself as an outlander.
posted by Devils Rancher at 6:27 AM on April 15, 2011

The best British-speakers-mangling-Japanese-names was the World Cup here way back when. Most Japanese words end with vowel sounds, which for whatever accent that was somehow seems like it needs an extra 'r' or five at the end. Yokohama --> Yokohahmer, Niigata --> Neegatter, Osaka --> Osakker, Honda --> Hondurr, and so on. I loved it, and believe place names and family names should be changed accordingly.
posted by Ghidorah at 6:58 AM on April 15, 2011

Five or six years ago, during a particularly bad spot in my live, I had the occasion (necessity) to stay at an evangelistic Christian woman's shelter for a few months. Everything was "awesome" there. God was awesome, I was awesome, breakfast was awesome (it was not). I have never been in the presence of so much awesome in my life and hope that the opportunity shall never rise again but if there was ever an ounce of serial killer in my make-up it would have surfaced during that awesome stay.
posted by Poet_Lariat at 7:46 AM on April 15, 2011

> To this day, if you pronounce the e, you reveal yourself as an outlander.

Interesting. I've never heard it pronounced without the final e, and I've been tubin' (you never, ever pronounce tubin' with the g) down the Guadalupe many times.
posted by Burhanistan at 7:48 AM on April 15, 2011

I'm sensitive to these little distinctions because I'm often out caving on ranches, and conversing with the locals in the dialect is part of the gig.

My grandad grew up on the "Guad-loop" in the 30's and 40's. Pretty much fished and hunted his way through the great depression. Some of my early childhood memories involve "shining" deer at night on the backroads outside of Nixon. Other mis-pronounciations of note: New Braunfels is "New Braunsvull." Manchaca is "Man-chack. LLano is "Lan-oh."
posted by Devils Rancher at 8:11 AM on April 15, 2011

DEFLATION, no.....
posted by clavdivs at 9:42 AM on April 15, 2011

Buda "Byoo-dah" and Manor "May-nor"

I don't know if they would be considered mispronounciations, but they caught me out.
posted by mimo at 10:05 AM on April 15, 2011

My favorite story about mispronunciation leading to odd translation is the name of a river here in Colorado:

When Escalante first ventured intrepidly north from Santa Fe, way back in 1776, out of the high desert into the prickly wasteland that is now Colorado, they stumbled upon a large river near the northernmost tip of their journey. Here they claim to have found the rusted armor of some previous lost party of Spaniards which must have come north at some point a hundred years previous and perished in the wilderness. Gazing at this desolate scene, and reaching into their dramatic Spanish souls, the members of the Escalante expedition named the river "El Rio de las Animas Perdidas en Purgatorio," or "The River of the Lost Souls in Purgatory."

When the French trappers started actually roaming across the Colorado wilderness in the early 1800s, they translated the fraught Spanish name of the river and shortened it, keeping a bit of the dire implication but making it a bit punchier: they called it "Le Purgatoire," and it was an early landmark for them between the wilds and the outpost at Santa Fe.

But in the 1830s and 1840s, as trapping boomed and then gave way to larger immigration and subsequent US military outposts, the English-speaking trappers and mountain men and the new arrivals from the east heard the name "Purgatoire" utterly differently, and in a stroke that sort of demonstrates the lack of grand drama in the American soul, unwittingly gave it a new name.

It's been the Picketwire River ever since.
posted by koeselitz at 10:34 AM on April 15, 2011 [5 favorites]

Manchaca really threw me when I moved to Austin. Guadalupe less so, but I grew up in Houston where we had Bissonnet (bis so NET) and San Felipe (San FILL uh pee), so it wasn't like I'd never heard a gringo-style pronunciation before. I also reflexively say San Jac for San Jacinto (pronounced, for non Texans, jah SIN to).

Also my husband has family up near Palestine (pal uh STEEN). I'm told the people who named it had read their Bibles, just never heard the name spoken aloud by anyone who knew how to pronounce it!
posted by immlass at 10:36 AM on April 15, 2011

It's been the Picketwire River ever since.

That's pretty great. I love the etymology of the mis... ahem [prescriptivist!] altered pronunciation.

Buda "Byoo-dah" and Manor "May-nor"

They really seem endless around here. I forgot those two. San-Juh-sinto is definitely one that's always bugged me, too. Considering the size of the Latino population in Texas, I wonder precisely how these all got altered. It seems unlikely that it would have been simply through Anglos not having ever heard them being pronounced correctly in the first place. Then again, even Austin used to be very segregated between Latinos/Anglos. A lot of the altered pronunciations seem equal-opportunity language-wise, though, with original place names that have locally funny pronunciations being German, English and Spanish.
posted by Devils Rancher at 11:13 AM on April 15, 2011

San-Juh-sinto is definitely one that's always bugged me, too.

It was fun listening to Matt and pb argue over how to pronounce that when we were all driving around SXSW last year.
posted by cortex (staff) at 11:20 AM on April 15, 2011

I always like Versailles, outside of Pittsburgh. Pronounced "Versales".
posted by inigo2 at 11:32 AM on April 15, 2011 [1 favorite]

I like Calais, Maine, myself: "Callous"
posted by Sys Rq at 11:35 AM on April 15, 2011

Sequim, WA, which I wanted to pronounce "Say-keem" is known locally as "Skwim." They totally ditch the e and one syllable.
posted by Devils Rancher at 12:02 PM on April 15, 2011

How the hell did this thread end up here?

I love the way Vermonters pronounce their French-named towns. "mont-PEEL-yer", "shar-LOT", "ver-GENZ", &c.
posted by Rock Steady at 12:04 PM on April 15, 2011

My favorite is Boise, ID. "Boy-zee." Not "Bwahz" like you'd expect from the French.
posted by sonika at 12:11 PM on April 15, 2011

Illinois is pretty much the king of this. In college, whenever we wanted to see a movie, we went to the fashion capital of Illinois, Milan (pronounced My-lun). We've also got the capital of Egypt, Kay-roh (Cairo), and, much like Pennsylvania, we've got Marcel's, also known as Marseilles.
posted by Ghidorah at 8:43 PM on April 15, 2011

here in michigan, we can always tell out of staters because they say MACKINAC instead of mac-in-aw and SALT sainte marie instead of SOO sainte marie

but we all mispronounce detroit, don't we?

it's also interesting that lima rd in fort wayne is pronounced LYma
posted by pyramid termite at 9:19 PM on April 15, 2011

it's also interesting that lima rd in fort wayne is pronounced LYma

Like the bean?
posted by Sys Rq at 9:22 PM on April 15, 2011

I don't get annoyed b/c of the o/use of "awesome" so much as the o/use of spelling w/ w/ a / & w/o the use of ith, and w/o w/a / & w/o the use of ith & ut, & b/c w/o the use of e & ause.

e ause I'm a contrarian, from n/o I'm going to rebel & always spell them ith the missing letters and ith ut the use of b, c, w, & o. I will, however, continue to say "aesme".
posted by tel3path at 4:27 AM on April 16, 2011

awesome is ponderous
posted by Carbolic at 5:04 PM on April 16, 2011

Can we update this now?
posted by longbaugh at 5:16 PM on April 16, 2011

How the hell did this thread end up here?

Toined left at Albakoikey.
posted by flabdablet at 6:21 PM on April 16, 2011 [2 favorites]

Quoth Terry Pratchett tonight at the Opera House: "Use 'awesome' when God and Jesus are descending from the Heavens. Everything else is 'cool'.

I am chastised.
posted by Lovecraft In Brooklyn at 1:53 AM on April 17, 2011 [3 favorites]

God and Jesus

And possibly Arianist!
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 5:34 AM on April 17, 2011 [1 favorite]

Quoth Terry Pratchett tonight at the Opera House: "Use 'awesome' when God and Jesus are descending from the Heavens.

So he's advocating a universal moratorium on the word, then?

Everything else is 'cool'.

Even forest fires?
posted by Sys Rq at 12:34 PM on April 17, 2011

Around 1985, I suspected that "massive" was an imminent usurper of "awesome." I think I may have imagined it, though.

I thought the opossum word had only been around for about a decade.

But then again I'm so old I can remember when "party" was only a noun. (And yes, I hated the verb-i-zation of that word.)

here in michigan, we can always tell out of staters because they say MACKINAC instead of mac-in-aw and SALT sainte marie instead of SOO sainte marie

Quick, how do you pronounce Lasher Road. I'll give you a pop if you say it right.

As for y'all - when my Michigan-bred niece was a novice teacher in Houston she told the class, "You guys open your books." And only the boys in the class did it.
posted by NorthernLite at 9:23 AM on April 18, 2011

Quick, how do you pronounce Lasher Road. I'll give you a pop if you say it right.

Well, first you have to spell it right: Lahser. Once you do that, it's easy to pronounce: LAH-sir
posted by The World Famous at 9:49 AM on April 18, 2011

Ouch. When shall I learn, post in haste, be snarked upon at leisure? Anyway, yes, it is spelled Lahser but for some reason I've heard many people call it Lasher.

Now excuse me but I have to drive up Livernoizzz to a party store.
posted by NorthernLite at 12:02 PM on April 18, 2011

But then again I'm so old I can remember when "party" was only a noun. (And yes, I hated the verb-i-zation of that word.)

You really are old!

The verb is first attested 1922, from the noun.

posted by Sys Rq at 12:24 PM on April 18, 2011 [1 favorite]

Anyway, yes, it is spelled Lahser but for some reason I've heard many people call it Lasher.

When I was growing up there (my childhood home was one house away from Lahser Road), I noticed that people living toward the north end of Lahser Road pronounced it "Lahser," but people living farther south called were more likely to pronounce it "Lasher" and, just as often, spelled it wrong, too. There was a big mailbox on Lahser somewhere between 14 Mile and 12 Mile, if I remember right, that had the address painted on it in giant letters, spelled wrong.

The summer after high school and before college, I had a job in Dearborn. Whenever I told people where I lived, they had never heard of Lahser Road before. But they had heard of "Lasher" and told me I was pronouncing it wrong. For whatever it's worth, everyone where I grew up pronounced it as it is correctly spelled. Sort of a micro-regional thing, I guess.
posted by The World Famous at 10:13 AM on April 19, 2011