Uplifting thoughts for friend in need April 13, 2011 12:38 PM Subscribe
I want to suggest some uplifting askme threads that deal with feelings of inadequacy, stress and depression to a friend. Which ones?
A close friend of mine is having a hard time: bad boyfriend*; fear of failing her upcoming exams and an unrelenting depression. Exams are in less than a month and I'm worried that she (she as in depression) is dragging herself down so won't be able to handle both the revision and the actual exams as I know she can.
She's feeling tired, stupid, inadequate, depressed and I hate to see her like this. I'm more and more worried it will affect how she performs which will, in turn, only make her feel worse and compound, well, everything.
In the past something that has really helped me was reading askme threads that not only mean me feel less alone ('okay, so someone else goes through this') but also that such situations are met with warm and kind answers from the mefi community. Giving perspective and supportive advice is one of the best things that askme does.
Problem is that I can't seem to find the threads that I found helpful so I was hoping that you guys could suggest some. Threads that deal with bad relationships* (there was a thread a while back that said something on the lines of 'making bad relationship decisions doesn't make you a bad person'), depression, inadequacy, procrastination, sense of inferiority...etc Essentially threads where people are feeling in a rut and mefi lifts them out.
Thanks a lot and I'm sorry if this isn't an appropriate meta.
I hope this doesn't come across as 'show me the threads where people are doing bad so my friend can comparatively feel better' #really# not the intent although I could see how the question could be understood that way. More of a question of perspective and support: hard part of depression is that inner void of deep set loneliness and seeing that strangers can deal with the same problems can only help to my mind.
*Just as an FYI: when i say bad, I just mean that as far as I can tell her boyfriend isn't supportive and isn't making her happy. I know that you can't tell more than that (and even...) from the outside and mean it more in a 'handling hard relationships' than DTMFA material- especially with exams on the way
A close friend of mine is having a hard time: bad boyfriend*; fear of failing her upcoming exams and an unrelenting depression. Exams are in less than a month and I'm worried that she (she as in depression) is dragging herself down so won't be able to handle both the revision and the actual exams as I know she can.
She's feeling tired, stupid, inadequate, depressed and I hate to see her like this. I'm more and more worried it will affect how she performs which will, in turn, only make her feel worse and compound, well, everything.
In the past something that has really helped me was reading askme threads that not only mean me feel less alone ('okay, so someone else goes through this') but also that such situations are met with warm and kind answers from the mefi community. Giving perspective and supportive advice is one of the best things that askme does.
Problem is that I can't seem to find the threads that I found helpful so I was hoping that you guys could suggest some. Threads that deal with bad relationships* (there was a thread a while back that said something on the lines of 'making bad relationship decisions doesn't make you a bad person'), depression, inadequacy, procrastination, sense of inferiority...etc Essentially threads where people are feeling in a rut and mefi lifts them out.
Thanks a lot and I'm sorry if this isn't an appropriate meta.
I hope this doesn't come across as 'show me the threads where people are doing bad so my friend can comparatively feel better' #really# not the intent although I could see how the question could be understood that way. More of a question of perspective and support: hard part of depression is that inner void of deep set loneliness and seeing that strangers can deal with the same problems can only help to my mind.
*Just as an FYI: when i say bad, I just mean that as far as I can tell her boyfriend isn't supportive and isn't making her happy. I know that you can't tell more than that (and even...) from the outside and mean it more in a 'handling hard relationships' than DTMFA material- especially with exams on the way
I asked this question years go when I was going through a rough patch, and I found the answers really touching and helpful. I hope it will help your friend as well.
posted by katie at 5:00 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by katie at 5:00 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
May I suggest you have her sign up or buy her a membership? I've made so many wonderful friends here who offer a sympathetic ear when I'm upset and celebrate with me when great things happen.
posted by IndigoRain at 11:10 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by IndigoRain at 11:10 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
Somebody reminded me of this old one the other day. Might be at least partly relevant.
posted by Decani at 4:11 AM on April 14, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by Decani at 4:11 AM on April 14, 2011 [1 favorite]
Have you ever learned to be more optimistic?
What's your favorite motivational phrase?
Phrases or slogans to help yourself calm down
Shiny happy people speak out
Why do I deserve happiness?
What cheers you up?
How do you bounce back from failure?
Where can I find faith in humanity online?
How can I be good to myself when going through heartache?
How can I get out of my bad mood?
Help me surround myself with happy
How do I let go and let life go at its own pace?
Help me be my own best friend
How do you feel good about yourself?
Tips for loving myself and others
How do I rebuild my self-esteem after a breakup?
Uplifting tunes for the resolutely optimistic
Failing successfully
Unlikely people who succeeded
Letting go of negative interactions with other people
How to feel a stronger sense of self worth
How can I ignore my ego and take my lumps gracefully?
Also, make sure you look at the "Related Questions" at the end of each Askme.
posted by triggerfinger at 11:38 AM on April 14, 2011 [15 favorites]
What's your favorite motivational phrase?
Phrases or slogans to help yourself calm down
Shiny happy people speak out
Why do I deserve happiness?
What cheers you up?
How do you bounce back from failure?
Where can I find faith in humanity online?
How can I be good to myself when going through heartache?
How can I get out of my bad mood?
Help me surround myself with happy
How do I let go and let life go at its own pace?
Help me be my own best friend
How do you feel good about yourself?
Tips for loving myself and others
How do I rebuild my self-esteem after a breakup?
Uplifting tunes for the resolutely optimistic
Failing successfully
Unlikely people who succeeded
Letting go of negative interactions with other people
How to feel a stronger sense of self worth
How can I ignore my ego and take my lumps gracefully?
Also, make sure you look at the "Related Questions" at the end of each Askme.
posted by triggerfinger at 11:38 AM on April 14, 2011 [15 favorites]
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http://mssv.net/wiki/index.php/DepressionAskMes. Start here. The first suggestion: Shiny, Happy People is wonderful.
posted by zarq at 12:45 PM on April 13, 2011 [1 favorite]