My first MeFi dream

January 16, 2017 7:28 AM

So, do any of you have dreams involving MetaFilter? I just did.

I had a dream that I discovered that wenestvedt's house was next door to my office. Except my office was located on the street my apartment is on, and he looked very suspiciously like my actual next-door neighbor. But there was a cozy little sign on his lampost saying "wenestvedt", so I asked him if he was the MeFite by that name, and he said yes. The best part of the dream was that, after our chat, I came back inside and posted here on MetaTalk (where I've never posted before) about our encounter. I probably would not have posted this but for that detail, but now I kind of have to, right?

posted by kevinbelt to MetaFilter-Related at 7:28 AM (42 comments total)

KEVINBELT WAKE UP YOU'RE STILL DREAMING
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:28 AM on January 16, 2017 [31 favorites]

now that we're in kevinbelt's dream let's get up to some hijinx

cortex toss me that snow fractal, i want to place it gently on an airplane mid-flight while my father sternly dips one fingertip into his coffee
posted by beerperson at 7:36 AM on January 16, 2017 [7 favorites]

All my weird dreams end with the building burning down, so everyone should just take a moment to check their fire insurance policies are paid up.
posted by jacquilynne at 7:41 AM on January 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

But were you wearing pants?
posted by slipthought at 7:41 AM on January 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

So YOU'RE the one responsible for Trump! I demand you wake up THIS INSTANT!
posted by briank at 7:42 AM on January 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

I once had a dream about jonmc, whom I've never met (though I've seen his picture). He was in my office, moving some boxes of books. That was it. How boring.
posted by Melismata at 8:00 AM on January 16, 2017 [3 favorites]

So, do any of you have dreams involving MetaFilter? I just did.

I was really embarrassed after my first MeFi dream. My dad explained that it was ok and perfectly natural. Then he helped me change the sheets.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 8:03 AM on January 16, 2017 [12 favorites]

Then he helped me change the sheets.

Do you do that from your Preferences page?
posted by GenjiandProust at 8:40 AM on January 16, 2017 [6 favorites]

I had a dream that when the MeFites in New York had the meetup at Guy Fieri's restaurant, it was a disaster, and because I'd mentioned it as an idea during its planning, I was blamed. (I had this dream taking a nap while it was happening, so it felt even more real even after I woke up.)
posted by MCMikeNamara at 9:28 AM on January 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

I vote this thread is kept open for as long as Mefi exists so it can be added to whenever.
posted by glasseyes at 10:03 AM on January 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

Most of my dreams are about food and whether it should be eaten.
posted by zachlipton at 10:20 AM on January 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

I've had dreams where I'm reading MetaFilter. Actually, usually it's MetaTalk, which probably says something about my subconscious (probably that my subconscious is a gray place full of puns and pedantry).
posted by Kattullus at 10:52 AM on January 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

I could tell you but then I'd have to avoid some of you out of embarrassment.
posted by AFABulous at 10:54 AM on January 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

The only time Metafilter featured in a dream was once I woke into a lucid frustration dream. Everyone at a row of computers were reading and talking about something on this site recognizable from the colors, but to me everything on the screen was gibberish. I felt very foolish and grew increasingly angry because everyone treated me like an idiot for not being able to read the screen. Then when I tried to yell, my jaw would lock and everything came out in a hissed whisper. I woke up gritting my teeth and snitty at everyone all morning.
posted by 80 Cats in a Dog Suit at 11:05 AM on January 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

Previously....
posted by Lynsey at 11:48 AM on January 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

I have internet dreams sometimes, usually involving endless scrolling on Metafilter and related sites, chasing something that will relieve the sense of dread and impending doom, until I realize that I cannot in fact read any of the text that is appearing in front of my eyes. Generally, this dream is exactly what happened before I went to sleep that night, so it is pretty easy to explain.

Internet dreams make me irritable with my own brain. I want to say to myself: you could send me through endless space, through the depths of the ocean, you could give me any man I wanted, and this is what you come up with. Hard to get up on those mornings; I want a do-over.
posted by Countess Elena at 12:04 PM on January 16, 2017

but to me everything on the screen was gibberish.

That's how I feel in a lot of threads!
posted by AFABulous at 12:34 PM on January 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

Last night I dreamt I went to MetaFilter again. It seemed to me I stood by the iron gate leading to the drive, and for a while I could not enter, for the way was barred to me. Then, like all dreamers, I was possessed of a sudden with supernatural powers and passed like a spirit through the barrier before me. The site wound away in front of me, twisting and turning as it had always done. But as I advanced, I was aware that a change had come upon it. Nature had come into her own again and little by little had encroached upon the drive with long tenacious fingers, on and on the poor thread that had once been our drive. And finally, there was Metafilter, Metafilter, secretive and silent.
posted by mogget at 12:47 PM on January 16, 2017 [9 favorites]

I have occasional dreams that I am a MetaFilter mod and I ban people for (in the cold light of day) perhaps strange reasons. Especially other mods. For example, I have banned Matt for having a sentient garage door that kept phoning him up during our MetaFilter mod team meetings on Mod Island, Jessamyn for altering signups so people could pay in clumps of moss instead of five bucks, Cortex for "modding while rock climbing" (look I was asleep and don't understand that one either) and Eyebrows McGee for editing in "Ya Know?" on the end of everyone's AskMeFi question.

I've also banned mere mortal non-mod MeFites for being too American, not American enough, spraying too much axe body mist in the MeFite gym locker room, peeing in the MeFite hot tub (don't do that again; it's gross, even in a dream), pushing poutine into the back of the MetaFilter server as some kind of pro-Canada protest, wearing non-matching socks while posting to the blue (sick), and trying to brew tea inside containers which are not teapots.
posted by Wordshore at 12:49 PM on January 16, 2017 [12 favorites]

Oddly, I dreamt last night that I was at a party with several MeFites. As an icebreaker, I was offering to show people a cool optical illusion involving a desk lamp, but then I couldn't find the desk lamp I needed. Only other, incorrect desk lamps. It was weird.

My recurring social media dream is browsing Twitter. This tends to be semi-lucid, because sometimes I'll see a news item and I'm aware enough to know that it's probably not right because my brain doesn't have wifi. What's fun is seeing the steady stream of spurious nonsense my brain has to quickly come up with to fill out the timeline.
posted by figurant at 1:03 PM on January 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

I dreamt about the quidnunc kid last night, as I do every night. Because he's dreamy. Plus, at a meetup one time, he implanted these memory chip things to make sure I do that. I tried taking them out once, like Arnold did in Total Recall, with some tongs I had in my kitchen, but it got to be quite painful and there was this squawking noise inside my skull so I stopped.

So yeah, I dream about quiddy all the time. Vote #1 quidnunc kid!
posted by Capt. Renault at 1:21 PM on January 16, 2017 [10 favorites]

I've been banned from Wordshore's dreams before. It was so embarassing until I woke up.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:21 PM on January 16, 2017 [2 favorites]

For complicated / irrelevant reasons a friend has suddenly acquired 18 pounds of Wordshore's dreams. They are good quality. However (again, complicated reasons) the dreams must be moved, used or transformed into something else within the next 72 hours or so.

My friend lives mostly on his own, so can't have a Wordshore's dream party, and does not want the neighbours finding out about this dream anyway so cannot invite them. He can't consume it all in a reverie-fest in this time for health reasons (18 pounds). There are no imaginaria nearby he can donate to, and moving the dreams is problematic anyway (though not impossible). He can concoct stories, though not to a great extent. It would be a shame for these dreams to just be disposed of; what else could he do with it? Are there rituals that can use up 18 pounds of dreams and transform them into (preferably) thoughtstuff that is not Wordshore-dream-centric?
posted by ambrosen at 3:18 PM on January 16, 2017 [21 favorites]

Clearly this situation requires a very large Wordshore's Dreamcatcher.
posted by jacquilynne at 4:28 PM on January 16, 2017 [3 favorites]

I dreamed that Wordshore was playing a Wordshore under a Wordshore. Now I wonder if I should send Wordshore a Wordshore as a gift....
posted by GenjiandProust at 4:36 PM on January 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

I dream about MetaFilter all the time. I'll just say that. You know it's bad when you wake up in the morning, groan as you attempt to sit up in bed, and think to yourself, "Ugh, this will not wendell." (Yeah, this has happened.)

Here's one I once saved.

I once had a dream in which Jessamyn had a massive pool set up that had several different kinds of water and sand included. One small square of the pool was devoted to a swirling kind of water, alternately cloudy and completely clear; the one next to it held warm ocean saltwater; the one next to that held dark but clarified swamp water. The rest of the pool was devoted to normal pool water, clear and blue and chlorinated, for those not feeling particularly adventurous.

The whole thing was set up to answer an AskMe query from a landlocked MeFite about what various types of water and sand were like. The thread had spawned enough interest that it was posted on the front page sidebar, and ultimately Jessamyn called for a MeFi meetup to address the topic.

When I arrived, people of a range of ages, dressed in normal clothes—brown leather jackets, jeans, T-shirts, whatever was normal for them—were standing around in the water, leaning on the barriers between pools, talking to each other about this completely cool thing Jessamyn had created. One girl I was talking to about the shifting water part of the pool said she'd thought about bringing in a six-pack of Schlafly, but she didn't know if they allowed alcohol there, so she'd left it in the car. "Hey, I'm all for it, I'd bring it if I had some," I said, and she left to go get it...

Then I woke up.

So someone still owes me a beer. This debt can be made good on at the next meetup I go to.
posted by limeonaire at 6:53 PM on January 16, 2017 [5 favorites]

I dream about metafilter a lot, but mostly about reading the blue.

I used to dream pretty regularly about meeting various important British internet marxists - Richard Seymour, Nina Power, Owen Hatherley, that set of people. Once I dreamt that "London Underground" meant that London was actually underground and I was visiting for the annual Marxism conference and riding around this indoor London in a tiny car with all of them. They were really nice. I choose to believe that this means that they are all really nice in reality, but that London is not in fact under the earth.

Limonaire's dream is one of the most like-a-dream-I'd-have dream recountings I've ever read.
posted by Frowner at 8:23 PM on January 16, 2017 [1 favorite]

I dream about getting lots of favourites for something incredibly witty I've written and then I wake up and check. Life is *not* a dream, damnit.
posted by h00py at 4:51 AM on January 17, 2017 [3 favorites]

Okay, you guys - I had a dream inspired by Limonaire's dream about the swimming pool. I was at a graduate seminar and we were passing around bowls of different kinds of water and being taught how all water was capable of whirlpools and that whirlpools were what created the different kinds of water. So there were all these tiny whirlpools as the water reformed itself. It was pretty neat.

Of course, then I had a dream where I was trying to make a cheese plate for unexpected guests based on having two elderly pears and the last inch of some sharp cheddar from Aldi's.
posted by Frowner at 5:54 AM on January 17, 2017 [3 favorites]

...and the last inch of some sharp cheddar from Aldi's.

Sorry about that, but reasons.
posted by Wordshore at 9:41 AM on January 17, 2017 [1 favorite]

I kept dreaming about mods and election threads right around the time of the election, but now the details are fuzzy. I think cortex was trying to convince me that maybe Trump wasn't such a bad guy, and I was worried he had been secretly replaced by a robot? Good times, good times.
posted by corb at 9:45 AM on January 17, 2017 [1 favorite]

*apple F*
*search for "ColdChef"*
*sadly close window*
posted by ColdChef at 10:16 AM on January 17, 2017 [3 favorites]

Oh, and I also have occasional - no, regular - worries that Jessamyn will remember something incredibly immature I wrote on a website or forum, probably a library or information science one, in the early 1990s that I forgot about years or even decades ago now, and will bring my previously embarrassing text to whatever discussion I'm having online now and defeat me with it.

(unfortunately, I then discover that this is not me having a nightmare, but an actual wide awake worry)
posted by Wordshore at 2:51 PM on January 17, 2017 [4 favorites]

Jeez, even in other people's dreams, I can't get away from my job.
posted by jonmc at 3:41 PM on January 17, 2017 [2 favorites]

Wow, Frowner, that's awesome. Glad I could bring you that. Tiny whirlpools. I love it!
posted by limeonaire at 10:56 PM on January 17, 2017

Jeez, even in other people's dreams, I can't get away from my job.

I'm going to dream about Redneck Picnics and hotdogs.
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:37 AM on January 18, 2017 [1 favorite]

I had MeFi stress dreams when I first started working here, but rarely have them any more. But I just had a dream where I had to go to some sort of weirdly casual jail intake process with twenty other people in a smallish room, the whole thing resembling a cross between the DMV and detention and Jury Duty, and there was some confusion and a guy flipping out and at one point we took a lunch break and then I had to come back and finish getting ready to go to jail, and also had to babysit after? And in all of this, as a constant under-layer of stress, was the fact that I hadn't expected to be going to jail that morning and so was scheduled to work, and the site was pretty chill so I was managing to just do so from my phone but I still felt bad that I didn't have my laptop with me but I also didn't want to bug someone to take a shift short notice which upon waking was ridiculously over-polite of me.

Anyway, look, if you can't do the babysitting, don't do the apparently some sort of crime.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:32 AM on January 18, 2017 [5 favorites]

Anyway, look, if you can't do the babysitting, don't do the apparently some sort of crime.

You're only guilty of being an accessory after the fact -- it's mathowie who's up for the hard time.
posted by jamjam at 2:09 PM on January 18, 2017

This is fascinating, I don't remember ever dreaming about Mefi or any of you. I think I have to at least seen a picture of someone's face to dream about them, and for most of you I haven't the foggiest idea what you look like.

I did dream last night about someone I mostly know through Twitter, but I've seen pics of her. I dreamed the apocalypse (undefined--not nuclear just general Bad Things) was happening in Texas, she was stuck there, and I had to cram her, her brother, and their dog into my tiny Kia to drive them home to Tennessee to safety. I was very embarrassed about how small my car was for such a long trip.

I like Wordshore's dream though, I mean, paying with clumps of moss, come on, you should definitely get banned for that. And putting poutine in the servers.
posted by emjaybee at 3:15 PM on January 18, 2017 [1 favorite]

I was just falling asleep last night. Still semi-lucid dreaming. And in the dream, there were a couple of spiders following me. One skinny, spindly sort, and one burly dude. In the dream, I kind of faded out, and the focus became the burly spider, who in short order was sitting back on the couch with a beer in one hand, watching TV. I woke up at this point, chuckling.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 3:48 PM on January 18, 2017

Last night I just dreamed I had the perfect FPP, so glorious it had to be posted. So I posted it and it got some comments, but then I remembered the FPP was about my friend and thus broke the rules, so I was frantically trying to get to the contact form to explain but somehow no one could hear me.
posted by corb at 7:06 AM on January 19, 2017 [2 favorites]

Sometimes I wake up for no reason and decide there must be a reason and I dress and boot and head out to the barns cause I must have heard something. The Alpacas always have elected a soviet and tonight they would like to be sheared 4 months early because it is exceptionally warm and I remind them that just 9 days ago it was exceptionally cold and that I started up the woodstove for them and somehow wind up on the wrong end of the global warming debate and it's me against 25 and my heart is just not in it.

They think the poodles are small Alpacas and why do they get to live in the big house? They want solar electric out there and they are agitated enough they've lapsed into old Andean languages and I'm struggling to communicate. Heating, cooling, skylights, a plum juice fountain and opposable hooves so they can play with the hose and when I tell them that I need a faster gestation time and for all of them to decrease the coarseness of their hair to make that work and that a gastropub chef offered me a lot of money so he could do some Peruvian recipe they have a fit and assault me they call me a capitalist pig and intentionally kick over the lantern and a giant coyote huffs and puffs and blows down the barn and the flames quickly spread through 19th century Chicago and 20th century Dresden which are somehow right next to the barn and we're all on the bucket lines but they suck at this.

And then I wake up, reminded of when I was modding a forum. But I am going to to put skylights in the barn. That was a good idea they had.
posted by Mr. Yuck at 3:08 PM on January 19, 2017 [2 favorites]