Holiday gratuities/gratuitous for our beloved admins? December 28, 2007 6:14 PM   Subscribe

Is there a good place to send jessamyn, pb and cortex gift cards, canned goods or other tokens of gratitude as a thank you for their efforts in keeping MeFi blue in 2007, or would that be considered tacky and inappropriate?

Sorry, mathowie, but in this instance, you are the Man.
posted by psmealey to Etiquette/Policy at 6:14 PM (65 comments total)

Haaaaaaaaaaa, canned goods. I'm sure the mods would like nothing more.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 6:22 PM on December 28, 2007 [1 favorite]


Sounds like sucking up to me. Are they sending you canned goods or tokens of gratitude? There ya go... that's why I didn't pitch in to the "hey, let's give the boss a gift card" thing at work.
posted by wafaa at 6:22 PM on December 28, 2007


Well, speaking on behalf of all bosses who didn't get a gift card from their direct reports this year, wafaa: you're fired.
posted by psmealey at 6:26 PM on December 28, 2007


My address is findable online, but really a meltdown-free holiday season is all I really want from you guys. Personally, I love mail but I do not particularly love gifts; anything fancier than a postcard is overkill. If you have extra holiday spirit and/or cash, go take a friend out to lunch and say that your invisible internet friends told you to do it. I like turning the electrons into tangibles (for others) when possible.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 6:27 PM on December 28, 2007 [6 favorites]


but really a meltdown-free holiday season is all I really want from you guys.

But I've got plans, see.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:29 PM on December 28, 2007 [2 favorites]


The About Metafilter page mentions donations. Is mathowie still in need of financial support or does this place pretty much fund itself these days?
posted by ryanrs at 6:32 PM on December 28, 2007


You didn't get the memo? Send any gifts for the MeFi Team to me, and I will see to an equitable distribution.
posted by Meatbomb at 6:39 PM on December 28, 2007


Haaaaaaaaaaa, canned goods. I'm sure the mods would like nothing more.

Young's Double Chocolate Stout.
posted by eriko at 6:51 PM on December 28, 2007


Oh shit. I am TOTALLY sending all my dented unlabeled cans to jessamyn and cortex. Nothing says "thanks and great job!" like expired mystery peaches in their own syrup.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 6:52 PM on December 28, 2007 [11 favorites]


MetaFilter: Expired mystery peaches in their own syrup.
posted by hermitosis at 6:58 PM on December 28, 2007


Oh shit. I am TOTALLY sending all my dented unlabeled cans to jessamyn and cortex. Nothing says "thanks and great job!" like expired mystery peaches in their own syrup.

Mmmm, mystery dinner...
posted by pupdog at 6:59 PM on December 28, 2007


a meltdown-free holiday season is all I really want from you guys.
I wish you'd told me that a couple weeks earlier...

And without the label, are you really sure those are supposed to be peaches?
posted by wendell at 7:01 PM on December 28, 2007


According to the last podcast we should be sending mathowie stickers. I can't remember why, just that I spent a bit of time thinking about which of my random sticker collection he'd like the most (Neopets or Hello Kitty?).
posted by shelleycat at 7:01 PM on December 28, 2007


You know what I'd like? I'd like to see some people record something arguably musical and post it on Music. Even if you don't normally do that sort of thing. Even if it's not any good. I get a kick out of that sort of thing.

I am TOTALLY sending all my dented unlabeled cans to jessamyn and cortex. Nothing says "thanks and great job!" like expired mystery peaches in their own syrup.

[NOT BOTULIST]
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:09 PM on December 28, 2007 [1 favorite]


So the moral of this thread is that the mods want us to give people poisoned food and tell them it's because our invisible friends told us to do it.

Much appreciated, but the question is what we should do differently for the holidays. You know, to make it special.
posted by spiderwire at 7:11 PM on December 28, 2007 [3 favorites]


I am TOTALLY sending all my dented unlabeled cans to jessamyn and cortex.

I am still spending the gift cards you gave me to the dented can store from last year!

Meatbomb sent me a hat once, and a bag made from carpets that smells of yurts and yak butter and now I have all of everything I will ever need.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 7:13 PM on December 28, 2007 [4 favorites]


Oh, we set it to music. I guess that's new. Unless voodoo chants count.

Thanks, cortex!
posted by spiderwire at 7:13 PM on December 28, 2007


a bag made from carpets that smells of yurts and yak butter

That's actually called "Scent of Meatbomb." It's by Calvin Klein.
posted by ColdChef at 7:18 PM on December 28, 2007 [2 favorites]


You know what I'd like? I'd like to see some people record something arguably musical and post it on Music. Even if you don't normally do that sort of thing. Even if it's not any good. I get a kick out of that sort of thing.

You have so totally given me the Saturday before New Year's Eve project from hell. More on this soon...
posted by psmealey at 7:18 PM on December 28, 2007


Dented cans are half-price. Microsoft went down three points, we've gotta save some money.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:20 PM on December 28, 2007


I am the fourth and fifth hit on Google for "dented can store" Do not mess with me or attempt to appease me with lesser mystery food.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 7:23 PM on December 28, 2007


Nothing says "thanks and great job!" like expired mystery peaches in their own syrup.

I'm sorry to have to be the one to tell you this, but that ain't syrup.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 7:52 PM on December 28, 2007


jessamyn: anything fancier than a postcard is overkill

Holy crap - that sentiment is one of the top 10 things on my dream woman list! You don't happen to own a liquor store, do you? How about having at least three Ramones records?
posted by Slack-a-gogo at 8:08 PM on December 28, 2007


Ummmm....let's not mention to Mrs Slack that I brought this up. Thanks.
posted by Slack-a-gogo at 8:11 PM on December 28, 2007


Seems like the easiest and most expeditious way of getting them a gift they'll truly appreciate, would be to register a number of sockpuppet accounts that corresponds to the amount of cash you were planning on spending on gifts, then they can take the cash and buy themselves something they really want. (Note to matt: all income from psmealey's IP address is to be split three ways).

This would also be the gift that keeps on giving, as you could then entertain and regale us with a host of self-links and flame-outs, which will give our esteemed moderation group opportunities to exercise their closination and bannination skill-set.
posted by Devils Rancher at 8:26 PM on December 28, 2007 [1 favorite]


How about having at least three Ramones records?

I dunno, but she does enjoy a good egg cream.
posted by jonmc at 8:30 PM on December 28, 2007


Holy crap - that sentiment is one of the top 10 things on my dream woman list! You don't happen to own a liquor store, do you? How about having at least three Ramones records?

Creepy flirting attempt warning.
posted by sneakin at 8:53 PM on December 28, 2007 [1 favorite]


They totally want gifts. Give them what they want. It might be tacky. So what?
posted by Ironmouth at 9:02 PM on December 28, 2007


You've now got the number one hit for "dented can store", jessamyn.

No one can mess with you now.
posted by Arturus at 9:20 PM on December 28, 2007


I can say that to my knowledge jessamyn doesn't own a liquor store, but I'd put money on her owning Ramones records.

Seriously, Jessamyn, as one of the few who actually sees you occasionally, thanks so much for all you do for MeFi. I'll owe you a drink at CiL if you're there...
posted by griffey at 9:37 PM on December 28, 2007


Obviously they do not want gifts.

What is less well known is their predilection for tummy rubs. If you run into cortex or jessamyn at a meetup or maybe you're just in their house without their knowledge late one night, just roll them over onto their back and rub their tummy real good while solemnly intoning "WHO'S A GOOD MOD? WHO IS? WHO'S A GOOD MOD? WOODGY WOODGY GOOD MOD!" They love it. They'll act like they don't, just for appearance's sake, but they love it. Don't let the restraining order stop you.

I know this because we have been psychically connected ever since either MKULTRA or the Cavity Creeps or both acting together took me for study/interrogation/programming in the late 80s.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 10:24 PM on December 28, 2007 [9 favorites]


Thank God! Now I know what to do with those cans of creamed corn I was never going to eat.
posted by The Deej at 10:25 PM on December 28, 2007


If I send mathowie an unlabeled can of peaches in their own syrup, with no return address, wouldn't that be considered syruptitious?
posted by flapjax at midnite at 10:38 PM on December 28, 2007 [5 favorites]


sadly, I haven't found a way to can hugs, let alone dent said canned hugs (and let's just leave the syrup out of the discussion altogether).

so, mods (and matt) if we're in the same room, hugs! or high fives; whichever is preferred.
posted by heeeraldo at 10:55 PM on December 28, 2007


How about a nice big thank you to each and every one? Thank you, Matt. Thank you, Jess. Thank you, Cortex. Thank you, pb. And a happy healthy New Year to each and every one of us!
posted by Lynsey at 11:36 PM on December 28, 2007


I can say that to my knowledge jessamyn doesn't own a liquor store, but I'd put money on her owning Ramones records.

If so, she must have 'em on vinyl, because they're not showing up on her last.fm profile.

[Not crazed stalker; I just like the Ramones]
posted by Infinite Jest at 11:38 PM on December 28, 2007


ROU_Xenophobe: (Disclaimer) I don't know jessamyn or matt. I've had very little interaction with jessamyn or matt past the occasional need for mod services here and an occasional comment on their Flickr streams (/Disclaimer)

That said, the mental image you just produced caused me to burst out loud belly-laughing to the consternation of a cow orker.
posted by pjern at 3:01 AM on December 29, 2007


Good gods! I thought you were joking about dented can stores! Why don't we have them in the UK? Or do we, and no-one's told me? Sorry, that's just the most recent (and possibly the strangest) thing I've learnt from MetaFilter this year. Thanks to everyone involved.
posted by paduasoy at 3:03 AM on December 29, 2007


All this dented cans business has filled me with inspiration.

everything I eat
it comes from dented cans
over dented breakfast
i make my dented plans
when i leave my dented house
i put on my dented shoes
and when my dented ass is dead
please dent my tombstone too
posted by flapjax at midnite at 3:14 AM on December 29, 2007 [7 favorites]


ooops, I just realized my disclaimer looks like I was quoting ROU_Xenophobe. Sorry, mea culpa.
posted by pjern at 4:17 AM on December 29, 2007


f@m, you just penned a little Randy Newman ditty! Randy Effin' Newman!
posted by cgc373 at 6:00 AM on December 29, 2007


It's like as a kid when you just knew that one soft present under the tree was filled with socks and underwear.
posted by caddis at 6:05 AM on December 29, 2007 [1 favorite]


...or your pet what had gone missing.
posted by bonobo at 6:12 AM on December 29, 2007 [1 favorite]


Well, cgc73, Newman is one of the greats, and a longtime favorite of mine. Still, I think I was channeling Shel Silverstein there, more than ol' Randy...
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:17 AM on December 29, 2007


Oh shit. I am TOTALLY sending all my dented unlabeled cans to jessamyn and cortex.

I thought that's how you'd been paying them all along?
posted by languagehat at 6:27 AM on December 29, 2007 [1 favorite]


New band concept: Flapjax at Midnite and the Dented Cans of Gratitude
posted by psmealey at 6:28 AM on December 29, 2007


I have two Ramones records and maybe one cassette. All I have in MP3 format by them are weird mashups.

You've now got the number one hit for "dented can store", jessamyn.

* sniff *

god bless us every one!!
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 7:01 AM on December 29, 2007 [1 favorite]


New band concept: Flapjax at Midnite and the Dented Cans of Gratitude

That'd be cool for the first 2 or 3 records, then once we have a cult following we change the name to Claptracks at Kidfight and the Scented Dans of Platitude, just to confuse everybody, and, you know, shoot ourselves in the foot. (You realize you're already a bandmember, psmealey... first rehearsal is next Thursday, in Borneo.)
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:14 AM on December 29, 2007


I'll be there with my washboard!
posted by psmealey at 7:57 AM on December 29, 2007


a meltdown-free holiday season is all I really want from you guys.

I'll be keeping my Canned Heat for another occasion then.

I'm lying, not really a fan.
posted by ersatz at 8:30 AM on December 29, 2007


I'm sending edible panties, firearms, and blow.
posted by lukemeister at 8:42 AM on December 29, 2007 [1 favorite]


You know what I'd like? I'd like to see some people record something arguably musical and post it on Music. Even if you don't normally do that sort of thing. Even if it's not any good. I get a kick out of that sort of thing.

Merry Christmas, cortex. How many points do I get for this?
posted by Meatbomb at 8:48 AM on December 29, 2007


That is approximately one million points, Meatbomb.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:54 AM on December 29, 2007


wait, I thought cortex's last name was mi-LARD, not mil-erd.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 8:56 AM on December 29, 2007


omg rtf thread lady
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:02 AM on December 29, 2007


Artistic license, jess.
posted by Meatbomb at 9:03 AM on December 29, 2007


omg rtf thread lady

rtf timestamp hippie, I can't be everyplace at once.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:13 AM on December 29, 2007 [2 favorites]


Hey, hey, cortex and jessamyn, take your snarking and flaming to the Blue like everyone else.

FLAGGED!
posted by The Deej at 9:24 AM on December 29, 2007


You probably altered the timestamp to give you plausible deniability. This is just like Roswell all over again.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:12 AM on December 29, 2007


Here's my contribution, cortex.
posted by psmealey at 10:52 AM on December 29, 2007


solopsist: "That said, the mental image you just produced caused me to burst out loud belly-laughing to the consternation of a cow orker."

How do you ork a cow?
posted by IndigoRain at 12:11 PM on December 29, 2007


Force it to read Dilbert. That'll ork anybody.
posted by InfidelZombie at 12:16 PM on December 29, 2007


How do you ork a cow?

Very carefully, with lots of lard and bacon fat.
posted by pjern at 2:20 PM on December 29, 2007


OK, I decided to take up cortex' music challenge, too, just for the heck of it. Here you go.
posted by spiderwire at 10:09 PM on December 29, 2007


wouldn't that be considered syruptitious?
posted by flapjax at midnite

Not sure about the peaches, but syruptitious is epononymous.
posted by RikiTikiTavi at 2:15 PM on January 3, 2008


« Older Sydney meetup!   |   Non-poster seeing "add tag" on MeFi posts? Newer »

You are not logged in, either login or create an account to post comments