where, oh where October 13, 2011 4:40 PM   Subscribe

What happened to ashley801? It appears that her account is disabled.

I favorited a lot of her comments and enjoyed keeping up with her on the site. If she is gone then I'm sad to see her go.
posted by pintapicasso to MetaFilter-Related at 4:40 PM (124 comments total) 2 users marked this as a favorite

She closed her account a couple days ago, no note or any recent drama that I know of so it's anybody's guess. People have taken breaks from the site lots of times in the past, so it's not unlikely she's just having some time off.
posted by cortex (staff) at 4:44 PM on October 13, 2011


Who?
posted by jonmc at 5:06 PM on October 13, 2011


Who?

Ashley801. It's right there in the post.
posted by ORthey at 5:10 PM on October 13, 2011 [36 favorites]


You'd have to own a television to understand.
posted by zoinks at 5:14 PM on October 13, 2011 [9 favorites]


Asked and answered, why not close it up?
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 5:15 PM on October 13, 2011


Ashley801 for other people like me too lazy to search for the account. Next one's on you.
posted by maryr at 5:16 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


In my mind, from her tags, I like to imagine she is taking a short break traveling around Britain and South America writing a book about oppressed dogs, which are bark-fully rebelling against totalitarian regimes, that will be made into a film.
posted by lazaruslong at 5:28 PM on October 13, 2011 [5 favorites]


Wait...so you can disable your own account and then re-enable it again later?
posted by DU at 5:30 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Asked and answered, why not close it up?

Just wanted to give it a bit to breathe in case someone knew something I didn't, but, yeah, not much to say here besides "dunno, hope she'll be back".
posted by cortex (staff) at 5:31 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Wait...so you can disable your own account and then re-enable it again later?

You can write to us and let us know you'd like it reactivated, yeah.
posted by cortex (staff) at 5:31 PM on October 13, 2011


DU. Profile page > edit profile > close your account > hit the red button!
posted by cjorgensen at 5:32 PM on October 13, 2011


DU. Profile page > edit profile > close your account > hit the red button!

Well, don't encourage that! Everybody knows we can't have a new thread until DU has commented in the previous one.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 5:35 PM on October 13, 2011 [9 favorites]


What I want to know is, what happened to the other 800 Ashleys?
posted by tumid dahlia at 5:38 PM on October 13, 2011 [8 favorites]


Ah. An AskMeFi user. That's like a whole unexplored universe for me.
posted by eyeballkid at 5:39 PM on October 13, 2011 [8 favorites]


And a damned fine one. Hope she'll be back soon.
posted by likeso at 5:46 PM on October 13, 2011 [10 favorites]


My contacts list is looking so sad. Ashley801, dersins, l33tpolicywonk all blacked out :(
posted by pointystick at 5:47 PM on October 13, 2011


Wait, what? dersins is gone?
posted by likeso at 5:54 PM on October 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


whoa...I didn't notice that those others had closed their accounts too. :(
posted by iamkimiam at 5:54 PM on October 13, 2011


I like to think they're out back in the alley, taking a smoke break.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:59 PM on October 13, 2011 [5 favorites]


Dersins made a comment in the kmennie thread that was deleted.

Ashley801 was active in that thread, too, more-or-less on the other side
posted by jamjam at 6:03 PM on October 13, 2011


pointystick: "My contacts list is looking so sad. "

Same here, and I don't even have that many. Rory Marinich, orthogonality, St. Alia of the Bunnies (though that one looks temporary).
posted by Rhaomi at 6:06 PM on October 13, 2011


I've taken a break before. Been thinking of doing so again.

I get a lot out of this place, but it often is a timesuck.

Sometimes I need to disable just to get things done or to reprioritize. It's like canceling cable. The first new season of shows you can't figure out why the hell you'd do that. Another year goes by you don't even miss it.
posted by cjorgensen at 6:06 PM on October 13, 2011 [3 favorites]


I hope Brandon is right about the smoke break.
posted by pointystick at 6:13 PM on October 13, 2011


Well I hope it's a temporary leave of absence as well. She's a compassionate and prolific AskMe contributor and she will be missed.
posted by trunk muffins at 6:14 PM on October 13, 2011 [10 favorites]


I recommend a four-year break. Really gives you a perspective. Well, me. It gives me a perspective. If you take a four-year break, I'll have another perspective. I collect those.
posted by Ivan Fyodorovich at 6:15 PM on October 13, 2011 [7 favorites]


I bet dersins is just off taking care of all those foster kittens he takes care of. That's what I'd do. I hope that's what ashley801 is going, as well (though not necessarily with dersins, I guess).
posted by rtha at 6:16 PM on October 13, 2011


Gave me a perspective on you, too.

Missed you more than I would have thought possible.

Welcome back!
posted by jamjam at 6:19 PM on October 13, 2011


I don't want them to get lung cancer.
posted by furiousxgeorge at 6:23 PM on October 13, 2011


My sockpuppet has also gone missing.
:(
posted by babbyʼ); Drop table users; -- at 6:28 PM on October 13, 2011


I hope all is well with Ashley and look forward to seeing her again on the green soon.
posted by Quietgal at 6:30 PM on October 13, 2011


Aw, that's really nice, jamjam. It's really good to see all of you whom I missed, too. MeFi is a neat place.
posted by Ivan Fyodorovich at 6:39 PM on October 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


she's great on askmefi.
posted by facetious at 6:47 PM on October 13, 2011


Hey, nice to see you again, man!
posted by StrikeTheViol at 6:54 PM on October 13, 2011


Ashley801 is wonderful. I hope she comes back.
posted by Mavri at 6:57 PM on October 13, 2011 [3 favorites]


All these "I like to think..." comments kept ringing a bell... until I remembered "A cat named Sloopy".... (ya gotta be older than shit to get that one!)
posted by HuronBob at 7:02 PM on October 13, 2011


What's with these AskMe only users? It's like they can't even be bothered to flame out properly on MeTa.
posted by Eideteker at 7:05 PM on October 13, 2011 [5 favorites]


What I want to know is, what happened to the other 800 Ashleys?

Eight hundred Asleys, they all went to France
then down to Morrocco, where they learned to dance
they danced cross the desert, down into Zaire
got work in the nightclubs, and did well, I hear
they chartered a flight to Chicago, but then
the plane was forced down, just outside Berlin
they wandered cross Germany, sampling the beer
then collectively asked "what are we doing here?"
they made their way eastward, through Russia and China
decided to set off for South Carolina
and the last that I heard, they were in Bucharest
so friend, if you see them, please give 'em my best!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:10 PM on October 13, 2011 [29 favorites]


I'm going.

To lunch.
posted by obiwanwasabi at 7:10 PM on October 13, 2011


Ashley801 is like freakin' Yoda in AskMe interpersonal questions. I hope she's enjoying her break, not stressing about anything. And I hope she comes back!
posted by Snarl Furillo at 7:11 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


I don't know who she is but she has a really good favourites to comments ratio :)
posted by 1000monkeys at 7:22 PM on October 13, 2011


I'd like to think a golden cowboy
snatched her from the window sill,
and safely saddlebagged
she rode to Arizona.
She's stalking lizards
in the cactus now perhaps
bitter but free.
posted by HuronBob at 7:23 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Just got a note from her saying that she will indeed be back (possibly under a new handle) and all is well.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:38 PM on October 13, 2011 [6 favorites]


I recommend a four-year break. Really gives you a perspective. Well, me. It gives me a perspective. If you take a four-year break, I'll have another perspective. I collect those

That's the hard way. I just take the elevator to the next floor.
posted by vidur at 7:43 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Sometimes the work of the cabal requires its members to drop out of plain sight. Now look at this spinning disc...
posted by Abiezer at 7:44 PM on October 13, 2011


400 flew east, 400 flew west. One flew over the cuckoo's nest
posted by jamjam at 7:48 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


That's good to hear. Ashley801 always has such insanely helpful contributions to askme, and it'd be an awful shame to have her leave forever and ever. She's one of the people whose long comments are always worth the read.
posted by lilac girl at 8:09 PM on October 13, 2011


I'm glad she's OK. She is awesome in ask me land. I've always liked her thoughtful comments.I wonder if she knows she is missed?
posted by anitanita at 8:54 PM on October 13, 2011


I'm glad to know she is all right. I'm going to miss her while she's gone and hope she returns soon. She pays attention and writes awesome comments in human relations AskMeFi questions. She's wise for her years (whatever those are).
posted by Anitanola at 9:01 PM on October 13, 2011


Just got a note from her saying that she will indeed be back (possibly under a new handle) and all is well.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:38 PM on October 13 [1 favorite +] [!]


YAY!
posted by jbenben at 9:03 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


what the what!? I <3 Ashley801.

And now I won't know who she is when she comes back.

::sad face::
posted by Sassyfras at 9:04 PM on October 13, 2011


Ashley802, duh. She does this about 100 times a year since MeFi was created.
posted by Think_Long at 9:13 PM on October 13, 2011 [7 favorites]


l33tpolicywonk

He's around under a new name. I think he was just embarassed about the old one tbh.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 9:42 PM on October 13, 2011


ashley###, when you come back, introduce yourself to the rest of MetaFilter. There's a whole world outside Ask!

And some of us are scared to go inside Ask, because it's either technical questions far over our heads, or rambly screeds disguised as questions but really looking for validation.
posted by Eideteker at 10:05 PM on October 13, 2011


Eideteker: "And some of us are scared to go inside Ask, because it's either technical questions far over our heads, or rambly screeds disguised as questions but really looking for validation."

Yeah, that is true, but at least you know if you leave it on the counter overnight, you can still eat it. And if that becomes a problem see a doctor then a lawyer and then if that fails and you are still having issues, a therapist. Finally DTMFA who left the sandwich on the counter in the first place.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 10:18 PM on October 13, 2011 [14 favorites]


Yeah, that is true, but at least you know if you leave it on the counter overnight, you can still eat it. And if that becomes a problem see a doctor then a lawyer and then if that fails and you are still having issues, a therapist. Finally DTMFA who left the sandwich on the counter in the first place.

That's just confirmation bias.
posted by villanelles at dawn at 10:31 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


"That's just confirmation bias."

Thanks, this validates just what I was thinking.
posted by Eideteker at 10:37 PM on October 13, 2011 [5 favorites]


And the mods are kind of like Lassie, they can give us vague gestures that's something's going on but no real specifics.
posted by villanelles at dawn at 10:50 PM on October 13, 2011 [12 favorites]


I still think there ought to be some sort of ritual humiliation process for people who close their own account and then ask for it to be reactivated later. The degree of shaming should be inversely proportional to the time between deactivation and the request for reactivation. YouTube videos and ridiculous items of apparel should be involved. Possibly also nudity and karaoke.
posted by Decani at 10:57 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Yeah, that is true, but at least you know if you leave it on the counter overnight, you can still eat it. And if that becomes a problem see a doctor then a lawyer and then if that fails and you are still having issues, a therapist. Finally DTMFA who left the sandwich on the counter in the first place.

That's just confirmation bias.


You may have Aspergers syndrome, but I strongly recommend a neti pot for that.
posted by KokuRyu at 11:00 PM on October 13, 2011 [4 favorites]


I'm not sure it's an automatic assumption that people who leave are in trouble, but that it's the most empathetic reaction. I'd feel like a jerk if I attributed someone's departure to not wanting to deal with all the recent MeTa grar when really their grandmother died or their puppy got cancer or work got crazy. Especially when there's no giant flameout, it just seems nicer to say "I hope you're ok!" than "what, did you get sick of us and couldn't deal with us anymore??"
posted by lilac girl at 11:06 PM on October 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


You may have Aspergers syndrome, but I strongly recommend a neti pot for that.

Is it safe to eat?
posted by villanelles at dawn at 11:12 PM on October 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


And the mods are kind of like Lassie, they can give us vague gestures that's something's going on but no real specifics.

So you're saying she's down a well by the old barn?
posted by potsmokinghippieoverlord at 11:17 PM on October 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Metafilter: vague gestures that's something's going on
posted by flapjax at midnite at 11:28 PM on October 13, 2011



Is it safe to eat?

That's something only your therapist can answer.
posted by bleep at 11:49 PM on October 13, 2011


I like how people here kinda believe that once somebody leaves they are in trouble or a bad place.

Probably because most people who are here are here because they like being here. If someone stops being here, it's probably due to something causing them to either stop liking being here, or something that prevents them from being here. Because we like being here, we are naturally curious when a previously positive part of the community leaves us.

Of course, IANYMetafilter Group Therapist.

Y'gonna eat that? I'm sure it's still good.
posted by Ghidorah at 12:05 AM on October 14, 2011


Is it safe to eat?

Dump the maturing food already.
posted by Elmore at 12:15 AM on October 14, 2011 [11 favorites]


I know this question has been asked 33 times before, but special snowflake details inside.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 12:52 AM on October 14, 2011 [2 favorites]


It's times like this when, rather than wondering (like a nice person) where the people are, I wonder if I'll get a metatalk thread if I close my account. Sadly, I suspect I will not.
posted by seanyboy at 1:48 AM on October 14, 2011 [3 favorites]


Asked and answered, why not close it up?

Because sometimes threads go nicely and why spoil that chance?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:46 AM on October 14, 2011 [2 favorites]


I remember, back when dinosaurs roamed the earth, how people used to make fun of the fresh-cheeked 14K brigade and the 5-dolla-newbs. There are an awful lot of usernames that I just don't recognize, but heaps of other people do, which makes me feel a little sad and disengaged somehow from the community, despite the worrying amount of time I spend here.

I feel a bit internet-geriatric (interiatric?) tonight. Well, most of the time, actually.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 4:57 AM on October 14, 2011 [7 favorites]


Maybe if you said hello to us occasionally you'd get to know us.

(SOBS, RUNS OUT OF ROOM.)
posted by subbes at 5:21 AM on October 14, 2011 [5 favorites]


It's ok, she's not our real mom. In fact, she's not even real.

*mouths the word "robot" to no one in particular*
posted by Eideteker at 5:37 AM on October 14, 2011


Glad Ashley80x is OK, her contributions are really good.
posted by arcticseal at 5:42 AM on October 14, 2011


Ashley801's been a consistently insightful, kindhearted presence in AskMe. Her answers have motivated me to put a little more thought into my comments before I open my fool mouth. I can't say I'm as successful at it.

I'm glad to hear she's coming back (at some point. No pressure, Ashley! Enjoy your Hawaiian vacation or whatever you're up to! Don't bring back any cursed sand!)
posted by Metroid Baby at 6:17 AM on October 14, 2011


Yow, a few people I dig have hit the button recently. I'd like to think that they're all like Ziggy Stardust saying "not only is this the last post of the day, but it's the last post we'll ever do" and while I'm screaming in disapproval Aladdin Sane shows up and tells me it's OK to eat the sandwich I left out all night.

So have fun and catch your breath, folks. Hopefully we won't have to wait until your Eno period before you come back.
posted by mintcake! at 7:14 AM on October 14, 2011 [2 favorites]


Folks drift away all the time. Amberglow left over three years ago and I still miss him terribly.
posted by caddis at 7:53 AM on October 14, 2011 [4 favorites]


Horselover Phattie: "I think if someone was actually in real trouble they probably wouldn't bother to take time out to disable their web forum account."

My thoughts exactly.

Actually, my original thought on reading this post yesterday was "you can probably split MetaFilter users into two camps:
  1. those who understand that you might need to disable your account when you feel the need, for whatever reason, to take a break, and
  2. those who actually have self-control."
But I didn't want the second comment in the thread to be that realization as it would strongly imply I knew Ashley801 at all and that she was definitely the former when I have no idea which side she'd fall on.

I thought about it in those terms because I know I'd be in Group #1 and realized that people who ask 'where'd so-and-so go?' don't have the same problems with self-control that I do. 'I needed to take a break but couldn't count on myself to do it' is easily the first possibility I imagine in cases like this.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 8:05 AM on October 14, 2011


Bring back quonsar!
posted by Mister_A at 8:13 AM on October 14, 2011 [1 favorite]


Zoidberg: "Good bye friends Ashley801! I'll miss you ...
Good riddance to them her. Now Zoidberg bitteroldman is the popular one!"

Farnsworth: "Yes, yes. Let's all talk to Zoidberg. bitteroldman"
posted by bitteroldman at 8:25 AM on October 14, 2011 [1 favorite]


I think if someone was actually in real trouble they probably wouldn't bother to take time out to disable their web forum account.
Actually, when i was on the run from my psycho ex, one of the first things i did was disable all off my online accounts. One, so he couldn't hack them, two so he couldn't trace me through them. Just saying...
posted by patheral at 8:26 AM on October 14, 2011


Can we also disable other people's accounts? I'm asking for a 'friend'.
posted by panboi at 9:22 AM on October 14, 2011 [1 favorite]


That's all we can really ask for, a friend.
posted by owtytrof at 10:29 AM on October 14, 2011 [3 favorites]


Amberglow left over three years ago and I still miss him terribly.

Almost four years! I miss him, too. Come back, amberglow!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 10:31 AM on October 14, 2011 [5 favorites]



I like how people here kinda believe that once somebody leaves they are in trouble or a bad place.

Sometimes they are and sometimes they aren't. Again I think it's just sort of a Rorshach, what you see in other people's closing their account is more reflective maybe of you than that person.

In any case I hope she comes back. I enjoy her contributions here.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 10:36 AM on October 14, 2011 [2 favorites]


What I want to know is, what happened to the other 800 Ashleys?

My first guess was that it was AOL -- when I was working customer service at AMamzon, I got an email from psycho8631 [or something like that] @aol

Well, for whatever reason she's on hiatus, I wish her the best.
posted by y2karl at 11:12 AM on October 14, 2011


Good to hear she's coming back. She kicks so much ass!
posted by futureisunwritten at 11:22 AM on October 14, 2011


Bring back Pope Guilty! May Ephemeral Blight rot in his self-imposed hell forever! WTF, Terrapin?
posted by Decani at 11:25 AM on October 14, 2011


I still miss occhiblu.
posted by rtha at 11:57 AM on October 14, 2011 [6 favorites]


If you ever see my account disabled it means I am trying to send you a message; I am being held hostage by Basque separatists and you should contact the appropriate authorities.
posted by Justinian at 12:35 PM on October 14, 2011 [3 favorites]


No worries, I got the number to that calzone delivery place on my speed dial.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:39 PM on October 14, 2011


I hope Ashley801 returns soon. I am also bummed that fire&wings disabled his account.
posted by mlis at 1:08 PM on October 14, 2011


If you ever see my account disabled it means I am trying to send you a message; I am being held hostage by Basque separatists and you should contact the appropriate authorities.

Same for me, except in my case it will be Bossk separatists. I called him "scum" once and he didn't take it well.
posted by drjimmy11 at 1:21 PM on October 14, 2011 [1 favorite]


I still really, really miss amberglow. He was my first instance of a MeFite who's posts/comments, I couldn't wait to read, and it was such a blow when he left. You never get over your first.

And I'm always surprised how much I miss Alia each time she leaves. As if some secret cosmic MeFi scale is off balance and won't be righted until she returns. Hope she comes back soon, and hope it doesn't take me too long to find out her next handle.
posted by marsha56 at 1:37 PM on October 14, 2011 [1 favorite]


I thought Alia did return, but was outed really quickly because she's all distinctive. konolias gonna konoli and all that.
posted by a snickering nuthatch at 2:11 PM on October 14, 2011


I have to say I never notice these things unless there's a flameout or thread like this. I also have to say that I too like Ashley801.
posted by sweetkid at 2:37 PM on October 14, 2011


rtha - my thoughts exactly. Wonder whether occhiblu came back under a new handle.
posted by n'muakolo at 7:52 PM on October 14, 2011


Sometimes I don't like the memory hole aspect of things around here. I could appreciate a vacation sign on ones account.
posted by Chekhovian at 1:20 AM on October 15, 2011


You mean a sign that says "This account is disabled"? Because, um, yeah, that's there.
posted by rabinowitz at 1:39 AM on October 15, 2011


But is there is an undisable button?
posted by Chekhovian at 2:08 AM on October 15, 2011


You can write to the mods and they'll reactivate your account.
posted by bardophile at 5:21 AM on October 15, 2011


Yeah, to sum up:

- If you decide to formally disable your account for whatever reason, you're welcome to write to us any time and say "hey, I'd like back in" and we'll reactivate your account. This is generally pretty prompt service.

- If you formally disable your account, it will have a "This account is disabled" message right up top.

- If you decide to informally take a break, or informally leave for ever and ever, you can put a note about it in your profile for anyone who is interested.

This isn't a memory hole, this is basic user autonomy over the status of their own accounts.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:11 AM on October 15, 2011


Dump the maturing food already.

Noooo! Cheese! Beer! Bread!
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:21 AM on October 15, 2011 [2 favorites]


There have been several Ask threads in the past couple of days I thought Ashley would've answered particularly well. She had a knack for cutting through bullshit and excuses and getting to the core issue without making you feel like a jerk or an idiot. Rare talent, that.
posted by pecanpies at 2:00 PM on October 15, 2011


There are times when I feel I'm really missing out by not reading AskMe, but there's only so many hours in the day.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 3:59 AM on October 16, 2011


"...but there's only so many hours in the day."

There are? That explains a lot.
posted by Ivan Fyodorovich at 5:23 AM on October 16, 2011


The only interaction I recall with her was a disagreement about teaching a little girl to fight off muggers with Aikido. A bunch of my comments were deleted, her comments were not, and I decided that I needed a bit of time away from MeFi.

I still dislike the way things went down, but on the whole, I think she is sharp and generally insightful. Glad that she will be back at some point.
posted by ellF at 6:40 PM on October 16, 2011


FWIW, she had a number of comments removed from that thread as well. It was more of a "folks need to stop arguing with each other about Aikido" thing than anything.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:29 PM on October 16, 2011


cortex, I'm amazed you recall such minutiae. (For what it's worth, I was being a jerk, and you guys were right.)
posted by ellF at 7:30 PM on October 16, 2011


We have no memories at all actually, just very very good back-end tools. It's sort of a good combination for work like this.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 7:37 PM on October 16, 2011 [1 favorite]


i have no memory at all
just very good back-end tools
they help to steer this wave-tossed boat
this crazy ship of fools
and when the seas are calm
and navigation is easy once more
i put away my back-end tools for awhile
and try to unlock memory's door

the door, it opens sometimes
but mostly it just stays shut
locked up tight, can't remember it clear
but i feel it in my gut
and just as it's coming back to me
the storm kicks up anew
and i go back to work again
with my back-end tools for you
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:21 PM on October 16, 2011 [4 favorites]


It was more of a "folks need to stop arguing with each other about Aikido" thing than anything.

Aikido you not.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:23 PM on October 16, 2011


We have no memories at all actually.

GOB Bluth at work again.
posted by arcticseal at 12:34 AM on October 17, 2011


These threads remind me of the scene in that empire music movie where they hold a funeral for someone not dead, just so she can hear how they feel about her.
posted by FunkyHelix at 6:45 AM on October 17, 2011


It was more of a "folks need to stop arguing with each other about Aikido" thing than anything.

Aikido you not.


GROAN. No, that was good.
posted by sweetkid at 6:54 AM on October 17, 2011


cortex: " - If you decide to informally take a break, or informally leave for ever and ever, you can put a note about it in your profile for anyone who is interested."

Which will disappear from public view when you disable your account.

Are any user-input fields profile visible once an account is disabled?
posted by zarq at 10:57 AM on October 17, 2011


on profiles.

Write like Yoda, I do.
posted by zarq at 10:57 AM on October 17, 2011


I don't think so, I believe it just reverts to username and join date and activity stats. At that point you are indeed formally taking a break, though, so the account disabled message shows.
posted by cortex (staff) at 11:00 AM on October 17, 2011


OK.

I mention it because I assume people are most likely to notice someone is leaving after they've already left because disabled accounts are now highlighted in contacts. So putting a note in one's profile wouldn't reduce the "where'd they go?" questions after the fact.
posted by zarq at 11:16 AM on October 17, 2011


No, yeah, I hear you there. I was more just trying to address the specific question of telling whether someone had, formally or informally, made a point of stepping away.
posted by cortex (staff) at 11:17 AM on October 17, 2011


Yeah, our feeling is that if you need to leave and leave a message to folks, you need to do that without actually disabling your account. We made that decision after some really weird profile "fuck you I'm out of here" messages where we felt like we had to make a decision between changing someone's profile page (never happens, I don't think) and just disallowing that sort of weird bad faith use of the site. So people who need to leave a message and step away will have to use the languagehat-approved willpower method. Otherwise, yeah, the profile gets cleared [though the data is saved] until you re-enable.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:34 AM on October 17, 2011


Has any thought ever been given to establishing a multiple choice field which would show up and remain active only when an account is disabled?

Obviously filling it in would be optional. A person could be given the option of choosing a generic reason for leaving, without giving them the opportunity to say, "fuck you, I'm out of here."

Might cut down on "what happened?" meta posts....

Something like,

This account has been disabled:
( ) No reason given.
( ) Taking a break. See you soon.
( ) See my comment history for further details.
( ) Will not be returning.
( ) So long and thanks for all the fish.
(*) Sofia Vergara demanded I stop mucking about online and return to bed.


Etc.
posted by zarq at 11:54 AM on October 17, 2011 [2 favorites]


( ) realized that quonsar wasn't wearing pants
( ) searching portland for a really big donut
( ) "goatse revisited" FPP was deleted
( ) approve of cat declawing, afraid for my life
( ) part of stalking plea deal
( ) biannual flameout
( ) biweekly flameout
( ) bipolar flameout
( ) got music, got rhythm, no longer have a need for askme
( ) tired. so very very tired.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 2:21 PM on October 18, 2011


Has any thought ever been given to establishing a multiple choice field which would show up and remain active only when an account is disabled?

Yep, we've discarded that idea. The list of generic options wouldn't be sufficient for people, we don't want to endlessly debate that sort of stuff with people who are on their way out the door anyhow, and we basically feel that your options are

1. click the button, leave a blankish page, stay in touch with who you want to stay in touch with
2. don't click the button, leave a note, employ self control to not comment

I really really don't want to start dealing on a modly basis with people who would click the "not coming back" button and then came back and the resultant questions and lulz and whatnot. Us allowing folks to close their own accounts is a bit of a courtesy [I think it started because mathowie was trying to shut down his Pownce account and was pissed off that he couldn't do it himself] but it's not something we want to build a featureset into. For almost all users, you are either here or you've left for good. There is a very small set of people who do this sort of thing more than once and they can sort of work things out on their own.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 2:31 PM on October 18, 2011


jessamyn: "Yep, we've discarded that idea."

OK. Thanks.
posted by zarq at 12:58 PM on October 20, 2011


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