Warmth. Depth. Fatness. March 7, 2014 2:03 PM   Subscribe

An intuitive interface. Built-in keyboard access. Three world-class modulators.

Introducing MetaFilter — — — Push the Envelope™
posted by Rhaomi to MetaFilter-Related at 2:03 PM (65 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite

MetaFilter: Provides all the warmth, depth and fatness
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 2:16 PM on March 7, 2014 [13 favorites]


If you enjoy the classic analog warmth of MetaFilter, you're sure to love the pure vintage tone of RESISTORSINGS.COM!
posted by ludwig_van at 2:17 PM on March 7, 2014


I think we've got that exact commercial template at work or something very close, and I'm sorely tempted to redo that commercial for the real MetaFilter.
posted by jason_steakums at 2:22 PM on March 7, 2014 [2 favorites]


Do it.

DO IIIIIIITTTTTTTT.




(do it.)
posted by Rhaomi at 2:25 PM on March 7, 2014 [9 favorites]


Ha, yes! Our new site sound system, truly an envelope-pushing synergistic integration.
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 2:27 PM on March 7, 2014 [2 favorites]


Unleash Your Creativity Snark.
posted by arcticseal at 2:30 PM on March 7, 2014 [1 favorite]


No matter how hard you push the envelope, it remains stationery.
Stolen from another board.
posted by ceribus peribus at 2:30 PM on March 7, 2014 [18 favorites]


For 99$ a pop, I'd expect a white background. That looks so amateur.
posted by bonehead at 2:38 PM on March 7, 2014 [7 favorites]


"MetaFilter lets you individually modulate the filter’s cutoff..."

I'm not posting 30-second SLYT animal videos,
I'm modulating the filter's cutoff.
posted by griphus at 2:42 PM on March 7, 2014 [3 favorites]


When I first read that I thought it said "Three World-class Moderators", and I wondered which ones didn't rate "world class"?
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 2:46 PM on March 7, 2014 [20 favorites]


Can we tweak the site UX to add DUBSTEP BASS WOBBLES?
posted by naju at 2:49 PM on March 7, 2014




Can we tweak the site UX to add DUBSTEP BASS WOBBLES?

Yes, I think we can.
posted by Wolfdog at 2:58 PM on March 7, 2014 [8 favorites]


Kenneth, what's the frequency? *places tinhat on self*
posted by inturnaround at 2:59 PM on March 7, 2014


Some of those sounds are more like flush the envelope. Still. I do like me some warmth, depth and fatness.
(home-cured bacon for breakfast tomorrow, so nobody should worry on my behalf)

So what next? I'm waiting for MetaTalk and the badass moderators.
posted by Namlit at 3:02 PM on March 7, 2014 [1 favorite]


WORF, SON OF MOOG
posted by cortex (staff) at 3:29 PM on March 7, 2014 [37 favorites]


MetaFilter seems more Buchla than Moog to me.
posted by infinitewindow at 3:30 PM on March 7, 2014 [2 favorites]


on that note, perhaps I should change my profile gender to "banana jack."
posted by infinitewindow at 3:31 PM on March 7, 2014 [6 favorites]


I do nearly all my correspondence electronically these days. I don't need any envelopes, and I really wish people would stop pushing them on me.
posted by aubilenon at 3:33 PM on March 7, 2014 [1 favorite]


Sounding pretty good...
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 3:36 PM on March 7, 2014


My full name is actually Wizened Little Prophet-5 Kid.
posted by Wizened Little Prophet Kid at 3:37 PM on March 7, 2014 [3 favorites]


(this is free-form, go nuts) is basically Buchla's primary operating principle, so I agree.
posted by naju at 3:39 PM on March 7, 2014


I'm glad this finally got posted to MeTa, since I'd seen the two deleted posts on the blue (thanks to) and actually clicked through to see what they're talking about, after which I started getting ads for ThatOtherMetaFilter on the sites I frequent without AdBlock (but I haven't seen them here, somebody tell the Waves people to get in touch with The Deck).
posted by oneswellfoop at 4:06 PM on March 7, 2014


I keep reading "modulators" as "moderators," so I though I should revise the write-up for the True Blue MetaFilter (also available in green, light and dark grey, and professional white):

Designed around a multi-user broadband content filter with extensive moderation options and powered by PB's Virtually Instant technology fixes, Mathowie MetaFilter has everything you need in a community web log. The versatile MetaFilter creative effects unit provides all the warmth, depth and fatness of classic analog chat filters, along with the modern control and endless flexibility distinctive of meta-meme tools.

MetaFilter lets you individually moderate the spammer cutoff, duplicate and derail time using three separate types of moderators – regular "American" hours mods, "midnight" and weekend mods, and a couple floaters – making it easy to achieve effects such as filter sweeping, control of flame-ups, auto wah, rhythmic gating, ducking, and hypnotic moderating without oily build-ups.

With intuitive controls that are inviting and enjoyable to use, you can effortlessly customize and program your own presets. Thanks to its easy-to-use MIDI Learn capabilities, MetaFilter can be controlled from any MIDI control device – a great advantage for live DJ performances. Moreover, when MetaFilter is connected to a MIDI keyboard, the keyboard can actually be utilized for playing the filter cutoff.

Whether you’re creating news posts from sound bites, adding a subtle comments to a guitar post, or simply mangling iambic pentameter just for the fun of it, MetaFilter’s versatility and endless possibilities make it the ultimate tool for reducing productivity with innovative, eccentric and cutting-edge posts on the front page.
  • Three separate moderator types: western standards, weekend and midnight filters, and floating-post filters
  • Fat analog sound quality
  • Intuitive MOD Response
  • Fully moderated anonymous post delay
  • Powered by PB's Virtually Instant technology fixes
  • Endless conversation-shaping possibilities
MetaFilter: try it today!
posted by filthy light thief at 5:05 PM on March 7, 2014 [12 favorites]


Has the C&D been sent out yet?

(I mean, come on, people. If you make a product, the least you can do is google the damn name before rollout.)
posted by Sys Rq at 5:05 PM on March 7, 2014 [1 favorite]


Sue their fucking asses back to the Victrola age.
posted by vrakatar at 5:27 PM on March 7, 2014 [1 favorite]


What's the big deal? This is the soundtrack in my head every time I visit the site.

wub wub WUUUUB
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 5:29 PM on March 7, 2014


Does it go to 11?
posted by notme at 6:55 PM on March 7, 2014 [1 favorite]


No seriously, when we sue, do we get a cut? Be advised, I have retained legal counsel who tells me: We get a cut.
posted by Random Person at 9:33 PM on March 7, 2014


And when you push long the envelope, the envelope also pushes you. "Beyond Meta and Filter."
posted by GenjiandProust at 10:41 PM on March 7, 2014


MeFi Music Challenge #79: create a song using only the Waves Metafilter plugin and this mercifully brief recording of cortex eating a giant donut.
posted by jack_mo at 12:02 AM on March 8, 2014 [4 favorites]


I demand an actual recording. I will fund cortex's giant donut if need be.
posted by solarion at 12:31 AM on March 8, 2014 [1 favorite]


Free-form, donuts!
posted by aubilenon at 12:48 AM on March 8, 2014 [1 favorite]


Oh Metafilter, your Chebyshev filter has such poles... I just want to pump your compressor in the side-chain until your signal turns completely wet and you approach the Nyquist limit.
posted by Rhomboid at 5:36 AM on March 8, 2014


Curious, how come the posts were deleted from Metafilter? Seems like best of the web, no?
posted by Melismata at 5:40 AM on March 8, 2014


Aside from the fact it's trying to sell me something, this advert looks almost exactly like those terrible dubstep-soundtracked video game montages of some kid fragging all the dudes or whatever that have already been endlessly parodied everywhere. I was half expecting a couple of BOOM HEADSHOTS.

But yes, first person to make a version of this but with Metafilter screenshots gets a cookie. A real big one. Maybe several.
posted by eykal at 7:16 AM on March 8, 2014


Somebody needs to make a userstyle to convert MeFi's interface over to this.
posted by Scientist at 7:34 AM on March 8, 2014


Curious, how come the posts were deleted from Metafilter? Seems like best of the web, no?

There's just not really any post there when you get away from the "ha ha, get it?" angle; a short "buy this thing" teaser trailer for an audio filtering plugin motivated by the funny name coincidence is pretty much substanceless when you take away the name bit. With the name bit, it's more of a Metatalk thing since it's more of a (tangentially) Metafilter-related situation and such stuff goes here.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:59 AM on March 8, 2014 [1 favorite]


This is great and all, but the first time I tried to quantitize a track using it, it told me to take it to metatalk.
posted by digitalprimate at 8:36 AM on March 8, 2014 [1 favorite]


Metafilter: pretty much substanceless when you take away the name bit.
posted by Melismata at 9:29 AM on March 8, 2014 [2 favorites]


Oh Metafilter, your Chebyshev filter has such poles... I just want to pump your compressor in the side-chain until your signal turns completely wet and you approach the Nyquist limit.

If you want that kind of ambience, get a bigger room!
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 9:59 AM on March 8, 2014 [1 favorite]


Wait, we’re not going to start ranting about how much we hate Waves? What kind of internet forum is this? (For the record, I am anti-Waves).
posted by bongo_x at 10:18 AM on March 8, 2014


(For the record, I am anti-Waves).

I suppose that's better than being antiparticles.
posted by philipy at 11:11 AM on March 8, 2014 [3 favorites]


I don't know about this thing, but I would be all for running MetaFilter through Reggie Watts.
posted by Room 641-A at 12:12 PM on March 8, 2014 [2 favorites]


I suppose that's better than being antiparticles.

I first read that as antiparticiples.
posted by Melismata at 12:47 PM on March 8, 2014 [1 favorite]


Bonus fun: after you visit their page advertising their product, you'll get ads for it on YouTube!
posted by blue t-shirt at 12:58 PM on March 8, 2014


blue t-shirt: ♪ AdBlock ♬
posted by aubilenon at 1:54 PM on March 8, 2014


Can we be Powered by Virtual Voltage technology too?
posted by brundlefly at 3:06 PM on March 8, 2014


I first read that as antiparticiples.

It's better than making an indecent preposition....
posted by GenjiandProust at 3:18 PM on March 8, 2014 [2 favorites]


(For the record, I am anti-Waves).

So was Google.
posted by arcticseal at 3:24 PM on March 8, 2014 [3 favorites]


So is this the place to ask whether anyone approaches waveshaping with anything other than a throw-shit-at-the-wall approach? Because it seems to me like VST creators should have a footnote on the "DRAW ANY OLD WAVEFORM YOU FUCKING WANT, DAMN!!" ad copy that reads "for essentially arbitrary results, hell"
posted by invitapriore at 3:45 PM on March 8, 2014


FAT ANALOG POSTS.
INTUITIVE ASCI SNARK.
FULLY MODERATABLE ANALOG COMMENTS.
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 6:29 PM on March 8, 2014 [1 favorite]


Wait, we’re not going to start ranting about how much we hate Waves? What kind of internet forum is this? (For the record, I am anti-Waves).

Haha, my extreme loathing for Waves is outmatched by my love for things named MetaFilter. I just impulse-bought this and am already using it right this minute on a music project. It actually sounds really good, and the MIDI stuff is well-designed (though Fabfilter Volcano is still my go-to)

::cries single tear, pops Midnight Adderall, goes back into DAW::
posted by jake at 1:29 AM on March 9, 2014


That commercial is so painfully generic, it took me at least 15 seconds to realise that it was an actual product and not just some kind of parody.

Welcome to Metafilter, Push the Envelope. This is Metafilter. Welcome. You can do anything at Metafiltercom. The only limit is yourself.
posted by Gordafarin at 3:18 AM on March 9, 2014


This guy's the limit!
posted by aubilenon at 3:26 AM on March 9, 2014


There's only one VST commercial worth your attention
posted by PeterMcDermott at 3:46 AM on March 9, 2014


I for one will make sure to do my part in bringing the fatness

by which I mean I'm going to go get some ice cream
posted by DoctorFedora at 3:58 AM on March 9, 2014


That sounds more like Metafilternom
posted by Namlit at 6:37 AM on March 9, 2014


I don't see any knobs on the GUI for GRAR level, or the patented DTMFA switch. I'd love to hear the all-buttons-in "Flagged as noise" mode, though.
posted by anthom at 7:55 AM on March 10, 2014


OK so now ~half the YouTube videos I watch have this ad at the beginning of them.
posted by Jacqueline at 11:02 AM on March 13, 2014


Adblock works wonders.
posted by Sys Rq at 5:04 PM on March 13, 2014


Isn't this trademark infringement? I assume the name "Metafilter" is trademarked, right?
posted by crazy with stars at 1:04 PM on March 18, 2014


Isn't this trademark infringement? I assume the name "Metafilter" is trademarked, right?

While I imagine the heated arguments do tend to peak somewhere around 130db mark, I think its hard to define how loudly we each type, and I don't think that their product can help folks know whether the pork left out on the counter is any good (though I'd bandpass that right up). Also, we say DTMFA so frequently its effectively silent. Pretty sure any trademarks don't overlap.
posted by Nanukthedog at 2:27 PM on March 18, 2014


They Laughed When I Sat Down at the Piano.

But When I Started To Play!~
posted by Pudhoho at 1:36 AM on March 19, 2014


Surely a MetaFilter is some sort of advanced Filter controller or something? So you would have 3 knobs: Filter, Resonance, and Metafilter.
posted by marienbad at 2:40 AM on March 19, 2014 [1 favorite]


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