What's new, MeFites? March 1, 2016 9:33 AM   Subscribe

Lots of great ideas and debate in this thread about how to foster community. A few of us have thrown around the idea of occasional MetaTalk threads where MeFites can voluntarily share life updates with the community here. So let's give it a whirl: have a life update you'd like to share with your fellow MeFites? Could be major, could be minor, could be happy or sad or bewildering or funny or banal. Remember: Everyone needs a hug!
posted by duffell to MetaFilter-Related at 9:33 AM (309 comments total) 15 users marked this as a favorite

My latest thing is, I'm pretty proud that I'm getting over to the gym more consistently, which has been helpful in dealing with some unrelated downer stuff. Going to the gym! It's a thing non-gym people can do!
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 9:38 AM on March 1, 2016 [19 favorites]

my cat's breath smells like cat food
posted by entropicamericana at 9:48 AM on March 1, 2016 [16 favorites]

I've been self-studying Yiddish using those down-and-dirty alternate language learning techniques offered in books with titles like HOW 500 FLASHCARDS AND ONE GRAMMAR BOOK LET ME LEARN EVERY EUROPEANS LANGUAGE EVER.

It's pretty enjoyable, and I already learned the word for whiskey, which I don't think I have ever learned in a traditional language class, and is a word I use about 20 times as often as "uncle."

Whiskey is bronfn, by the way. Although you can also say viskey, which seems obvious.
posted by maxsparber at 9:48 AM on March 1, 2016 [16 favorites]

I got hired for realsies at the job I've been temping at the last couple months and will have dental insurance again within a week. The state of Illinois has rejected my tax return twice now because they can't verify my ID. This is my dog today. They officially made me the manager of my girl scout service unit, but there are DRAMAZ, and I don't think anyone else in the su actually knows I'm in charge now, and the old su manager isn't responding to any of the various messages I've left for her, so the leaders' meeting I'm apparently running tonight should be super fun. Relatedly, I'm drowning in girl scout cookies. The pair of iridescent creepers I ordered is stuck at the post office for some reason. I just logged in and did a purge of my grandma's facebook when I noticed she was following a page called "my inner child is a drunk whore." I'm currently in 1st place in my rundle in Learned League but I don't think I got any questions right today so I expect that to quickly change. I voted by mail for the first time last week and will never not vote by mail ever again, it's the best. I also just re-signed my lease which means when this one is up I'll have lived in the same place for at least five years; considering I lived eight different places during my first seven years in Chicago that's kind of a big deal.

That should bring everyone about up to speed.
posted by phunniemee at 9:51 AM on March 1, 2016 [28 favorites]

I just got some pretty ok new tires for my bike.
posted by brennen at 9:53 AM on March 1, 2016 [7 favorites]

I still can't face the boredom of going to the gym, but I'm a few weeks into a new routine of swimming and yoga-ing at new places and I'm finally starting to feel settled with it. I miss my old yoga class, which was at a crunchy-community-retreat-farm-type place rather than a noisy gym, but on the whole it's working well. My cycling mojo is still AWOL but it's only March, I'll find it eventually.
posted by A Robot Ninja at 9:53 AM on March 1, 2016 [5 favorites]

I'm stuck in an office where the boss and his bestie are hard-core Trump supporters. They have been repeatedly "cautioned" by the Upper Management to STFU about it, but they continue to go on ALL DAY, quite literally campaigning for Trump at their co-workers and subordinates, and there's nothing anyone will do about it. So I am looking forward to all of your stories to distract me from my personal hell. Please share many anecdotes about cute kittens and puppies and cake and ice cream. Photos of kittens and puppies also welcome.
posted by chonus at 9:54 AM on March 1, 2016 [16 favorites]

I turned 46 on Thursday, and celebrated by inviting friends to come over and just hang out playing board games and nibble on a bunch of random foodstuffs (you saw my AskMe about the burnt batch of taquitos - it was for this; but I had better luck with the "chicken waffle sliders" made out of mini-Eggos and chicken nuggets).

We had a whole assortment of games, but everyone ended up wanting to just play Exploding Kittens over and over. Which lead to a great moment when one of my friends who showed up late came in during a game, and walked into the room just as someone was saying "I'll see the future by deploying my special ops bunnies!" and the look of confusion on her face was priceless.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:58 AM on March 1, 2016 [15 favorites]

I've mentioned in a thread or two before, but Mrs. Pterodactyl and I are expecting a baby in July! That's necessitated moving out from living with our roommate and finding day care and all kinds of craziness in our lives, but we're really incredibly excited. Anyway, if in early July you suddenly feel like you've moved down one spot on the list of the world's best and most important people, that's why. You have, but it's okay. Don't feel bad.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 10:00 AM on March 1, 2016 [71 favorites]

I just got my first paid gig doing the thing I've been studying for and training in and doing on a voluntary basis part-time for about 6 years now, so I'm chuffed to bits. And financially it's beyond overdue (as are most of my bills)
posted by billiebee at 10:04 AM on March 1, 2016 [32 favorites]

At my last job, I spent years as "the second person in line to be fired," which is a peculiar place where people who are questionable to bad at their jobs can survive indefinitely, due to the world constantly providing a steady influx of amazing candidates to hold down that first in line slot.

Last year, I finally got a job I'm good at. People respect me and I've been promoted once already. It's weird, but good.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 10:07 AM on March 1, 2016 [25 favorites]

The state of Illinois has rejected my tax return twice now because they can't verify my ID.

I just paper-filed after giving up on that. What a fun state!
posted by michaelh at 10:07 AM on March 1, 2016 [1 favorite]

I am in the planning stages of starting my own business which means having started a new job a month and a half ago everything is very very easy and zero-stress
posted by shakespeherian at 10:09 AM on March 1, 2016 [15 favorites]

For the first time in my life, I have no idea what I'm doing. Every day, I'm figuring out more and more who I am. It's like a second adolescence at 34, except at 13 I thought I knew what I wanted. My life is hard and complicated and strange, but beautiful and weird and fun. I'm considering changing careers, and changing states, and in a way, using this coccoon time of my life to stop worrying about what everyone else does with their life and start seriously pondering what I want to do with my own. And many, many, many times a day, I thank the universe for the kind people of metafilter for helping me get to where I am today.
posted by umwhat at 10:10 AM on March 1, 2016 [26 favorites]

I've mentioned in a thread or two before, but Mrs. Pterodactyl and I are expecting a baby in July

I really like the phrase "expecting a baby" because it's so much like "expecting company" that it makes it sound like we've invited a baby over as a guest and at some point in July it'll show up, sleep on our couch for a couple of nights, and maybe we can all play some board games and go out to dinner or whatever.

Also yeah, super happy and effing terrified.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 10:11 AM on March 1, 2016 [76 favorites]

This might be the only crowd where this will go over, but... My seven year-old has a thing for time travelling/parallel dimensions stories, so we've been watching Sliders on Netflix. Yesterday, he looked over at me and said, "Hey dad, do you know what kind of burgers are my favorite?" "What kind?" I asked. "SLIDERS" he whispered ominously.

In short, I am raising an amazing nerd who is a prodigy at awful puns and obscure tv/movie references.

So yeah: I'm proud.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 10:12 AM on March 1, 2016 [73 favorites]

I'm pretty close to starting work on a second guitar, which will officially make "lutherie" about the 238840384th hobby I've had in my life.

A couple months ago my best friend in the whole wide world had a seizure and before she knew it she was having some eight-syllable tumor removed from her brain. Now she has cancer and is doing the chemo thing and is not quite sure how much time she has left, though fortunately it will most-likely be measured in years rather than weeks. The upside is it might finally get me to go visit her in Portland, OR and her friends have set up a fund to help finance her lifetime dream trip of living in Vienna for a bit.

I get to vote for Bernie today!

My son, whom I love more than just about anyone in the universe, is off to NYC next week for a model UN thing which means TIME ALONE WITH MY WIFE WITHOUT THAT LITTLE SHIT!

Over a year ago I started taking guitar lessons in an attempt to boost my competence and confidence and I set a goal of recording something for MeFi Music be January 1st. My competence has improved but, sadly, my confidence has not and I kind of let myself down by not posting to Music. One of these days I'm going to though. I would make a promise but I don't like breaking promises.

I routinely have to google memes just to know what the hell everyone is talking about.

My niece is about to graduate from college and she already has a full-time job offer thanks to a friend of mine. So now I'm that uncle with the connections even though this is the first connection I've ever made in my life. Still though, I'm kind of happy for them both.

I've been binge watching Arrested Development with my son and now he's a fan too and it's great that he's at the age where I can pretty much watch anything with him.

I really want to leave my job and get out of the industry altogether but I've been here for over 20 years and the thought of starting over is terrifying and seems impossible and I also don't know what else I would do so instead I just keep doing what I'm doing because it's the only thing that will pay the bills.

I've mostly come to terms with that and I pursue other things, mostly my hobbies, to bring me satisfaction.

Life is mostly really great and every day I am thankful for that because I know it can so easily not be great.
posted by bondcliff at 10:16 AM on March 1, 2016 [21 favorites]

I got my US citizenship last summer and two weeks from today, I will cast my first vote as an American!
posted by Comrade Doll at 10:20 AM on March 1, 2016 [60 favorites]

I got BOTH of my kids' summer activities arranged today which makes me feel like running around the house with both fists in the air and "Gonna Fly Now" playing. I like having things planned well in advance AND I successfully navigated multiple layers of bureaucracy AND I was quick enough off the mark that I got the little one into his week of "zoo camp" which always fills up on the first day of registration. PARENTING ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED!

It's actually not that big a deal, the big one is doing six weeks of school-sponsored summer camp and the little one is going to two one-week half-day camps, one at the zoo and one at the planetarium, because he wants to be the first HUMAN astronaut on Mars because if you didn't already know, there are currently ROBOT astronauts already there and he blows them kisses when he goes to bed and there is a Mars Rover poster hanging on his ceiling to he can gaze at it when he goes to sleep I am not even kidding. I even made him a stuffed Mars Rover because JPL does not sell one (*shocked gasp!*) and I am an indulgent mother.
posted by Eyebrows McGee (staff) at 10:22 AM on March 1, 2016 [40 favorites]

I'm having my neck removed and replaced with a robot
posted by poffin boffin at 10:22 AM on March 1, 2016 [20 favorites]

After earning her PhD almost 3 years ago, with a 2 year postdoc assignment in the interim, my wife has won the academic lottery and been offered a tenure-track position at Grand Valley State in Grand Rapids, so we'll be moving there this summer. After scraping around for a while during and after the recession, when I was trying to support us while she was in school, having a measure of stability to look forward to feels amazing.
posted by LionIndex at 10:23 AM on March 1, 2016 [34 favorites]

In other news in my life, I recently learned that Rocky song has a different name.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 10:27 AM on March 1, 2016 [5 favorites]

I am midway through what is going to be my last tax season ever no matter who I have to kill to make that happen. I'm kidding. I'm not kidding. No, I'm kidding. Maybe. It's made slightly easier by the fact that my boss keeps making "are you sure you want to do this for the rest of your life" kinds of comments. I haven't said "no absolutely not" yet but I don't think he's going to be distraught when I leave, as long as it's after April 15. I am probably moving to Omaha this summer, but nothing's nailed down yet. I have not yet been to Omaha, but my SO, who has been to Akron, has been through a list of reasons why this makes more sense that I can't really argue with.

I'm writing a little lemonade-stand style business sim web game but it's slow going because of aforementioned tax season and because I'm not using any kind of engine for it. It's reached the point where it's just barely sort of playable and that makes me incredibly happy. Not necessarily good, but playable.
posted by Sequence at 10:30 AM on March 1, 2016 [7 favorites]

I've learned (third time's the charm!) to keep my nose out of threads about Phil Collins.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:31 AM on March 1, 2016 [5 favorites]

"I recently learned that Rocky song has a different name."

If you'd played in high school pep band you'd already know these things.
posted by Eyebrows McGee (staff) at 10:31 AM on March 1, 2016 [16 favorites]

Today i voted, got a haircut and impressed my dentist with the beauty of my gums.

Yesterday, i drew this.

Not sure what I'll do tomorrow.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 10:31 AM on March 1, 2016 [15 favorites]

I'm moving across the country in less than 3 weeks! Eek. We're driving from Oregon to South Carolina in a Kia Soul with a 5-year-old, German Shepherd, cat, and rabbit. We have so much stuff to get rid of. Anyone in the Portland area want a hall bench? It's got hooks for coats, and shelves, and a big mirror, and shoe cubbies, and a place to sit to put your shoes on. Free, you haul.
posted by rabbitrabbit at 10:34 AM on March 1, 2016 [9 favorites]

About a month ago, I did a half marathon in Sarasota FL (my first in 6+ years!). I didn't do too well, but I finished, so yay me. As a congratulatory gift to myself, I'm getting some tattoos in the near future. I'm planning on getting a pair of llamas (based off of my wedding invitation), one on the back of each arm, above the elbows.

In January I got a promotion, and I'm almost done handing off my old job to a replacement who is doing very, very well. It's a weird transition, I had my old job for over 10 years. I moved into my new cubicle area last week. Yesterday was my first day that I didn't have to attend the dept meeting that starts at 6 AM, and it feels luxurious to walk in at 6:30 or 7.

In September, my husband and I added Taco to our family, a very naughty but very cute min pin. (I can't remember if I posted about him before or not.)
posted by Fig at 10:35 AM on March 1, 2016 [13 favorites]

The wife passed her major licensure exam (EPPP) and is already knocking out the other requirements like the GA jurisprudence exam [done], supervision hours [on track], and the facing the firing squad of the state board for the oral portion of the process [scheduled for month number 10 of post-doc, soonest allowed time for that].

So, yea, she'll soon be what she set out to be sometime in 2002, while still in undergrad (which is also when we met). She'll be done with B.S. and M.S and PhD and match processes and internships and post docs and all of the fucking academics and certifications will be behind us for good and she'll be employable and prepared to do the job she loves for more than the pittance of slave labor money she's made, when she was even making that, this last decade or so.

So, fuck yes.

Oh and baby number 2 is on the way and due sometime in August, with her post-doc boss(es) approved her to be done early to facilitate said baby's arrival.

... I honestly don't know which is a bigger deal at this point but I find myself leaning towards the former. It's been a long, dark tunnel.
posted by RolandOfEld at 10:35 AM on March 1, 2016 [12 favorites]

It's winter, and so we're in ski country which for me is sort of like house arrest; I ski, but not well or often and Mr. Carmicha takes the car to the mountains every day. Unfortunately, I'm screwing around on the Internet instead of doing deadline-driven work, probably because I'm terrified. I have a book contract and I'm way behind and a little stuck. However, the apartment is spotless.

My first private label product, which I had manufactured overseas, already sold out on Amazon and I'm developing new ones. It's much more interesting than simply reselling stuff, which I've done as a profitable hobby (scouting for stuff beats sitting in a hotel room and I spend many nights on the road) for years. Higher risk|reward situation.

I really like this thread. Thanks for starting it, duffell!
posted by carmicha at 10:39 AM on March 1, 2016 [12 favorites]

My partner and I went for short trips to Nashville in November and New Orleans in January, and both were the only vacations we've taken in a decade that wasn't to visit family (and most of those have been around funerals and other not-fun stuff); both were incredible and I loved them so much I almost considered moving from Chicago. (I'm not.)

Related to those trips and a relatively social 2016 so far: I'm increasingly worried my Twitter feed makes me seem like an alcoholic and that's taking up a lot of my brain space this week that is dedicated to running "hyper-self-focused worrying" which is why I'm putting it here.

Other than trips and drinking, the rest of 2016 has been about being in the process of getting my fucked up teeth fixed so that I can get implants or other fake stuff put in before I have no actual bone left underneath in which to do so. This means I've had approximately 15 extractions and multiple bone grafts over 3 visits over the last 6 weeks. I don't want to say that it's been as bad as it sounds, but yeah, it sucks. However, it's something that I've needed to do for a while and have put off out of a mixture of poverty and embarrassment, and now that I'm doing it, it's SO AWESOME to feel free of it.

Bonus lesson: if you are doing a scary thing and have good people in your life who you wouldn't normally talk about scary things with (for reasons of embarrassment or otherwise being emotionally closed off despite not always seeming so), consider DOING IT ANYWAY because it is very likely the support of those people will help a lot.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 10:42 AM on March 1, 2016 [25 favorites]

I was on the steering team for an accreditation visit where I work, and it took two years of planning and coordination of a department of dozens of participants. If you've never participated in one of these, it is like pulling teeth to get everyone to care that this is happening. We just had our visit (which is basically an intensive audit of all of our practices), and we got the full amount of time granted until the next visit with some very kind and positive comments. Wheee....
posted by SpacemanStix at 10:46 AM on March 1, 2016 [7 favorites]

I got married! Not only is the power structure of society oriented towards my wife and I being a legal unit, she can't even be compelled to testify against me in court! (nb: I have no plans to need this particular marital advantage)
posted by rmd1023 at 10:46 AM on March 1, 2016 [28 favorites]

This is starting to remind me of the Rotary Club's "Happy dollars"
posted by terrapin at 10:49 AM on March 1, 2016

I've been able to hold on to the same pen for two months now and that doesn't sound like a big accomplishment but it's a really nice pen.
posted by everybody had matching towels at 10:50 AM on March 1, 2016 [42 favorites]

I have successfully made this cake-thing, and (IME) perfected the recipe.
posted by meese at 10:52 AM on March 1, 2016 [7 favorites]

I am taking an Intro to Computer Science class, just for funsies, and today I found out that I got 100% on my first coding exam. I am good at (very easy, introductory) coding! Also, now I kind of understand how computers work, which is sorta amazing.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 10:52 AM on March 1, 2016 [18 favorites]

Yesterday, the beau and I sat down and planned our upcoming vacation, like the honest-to-goodness grown-ups we like to pretend we are, and made all of our reservations like a boss!

Then, because we were on a roll, we boxed up all of my old, junky pots and pans and such that I've had since undergrad (10+ years in my possession, and these are probably 20+ year old cheap pieces of kitchenware originally owned either by my grandma or my mother), so now I have nice, NEW pots and pans and bowls that are all shiny and stainless steel and I feel very Adult right now and it's the strangest feeling.
posted by PearlRose at 10:53 AM on March 1, 2016 [14 favorites]

Congratulations and/or my condolences, whichever best fit all y'all's situation.

In my life, I got Stardew Valley, a Harvest Moon tribute game that came out on Friday. I have done more or less nothing besides pretend-farm since.
posted by tofu_crouton at 10:55 AM on March 1, 2016 [9 favorites]

Had a session with a therapist yesterday, something I tried last year but walked away from. This is someone new and I thinkit might help this time. I'm still on medication for my mental health, but I'm glad I decided to give therapy another chance. I'm trying to make myself a better person.
posted by Fizz at 10:59 AM on March 1, 2016 [28 favorites]

I'm posting this from the toilet.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 11:00 AM on March 1, 2016 [2 favorites]

I had tuna salad for lunch.
posted by bonehead at 11:01 AM on March 1, 2016 [1 favorite]

Not sure if those are snark, but if anybody doesn't want to be commenting in or reading an updates thread, feel free to skip it, it's totally an optional thing.
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 11:12 AM on March 1, 2016 [10 favorites]

Having finally read the thread so far, I would like to offer you all (as appropriate): condolences, congratulations, cheering/encouragement, and an exhortation to not forget to wash your hands and to not leave leftover tuna salad out at room temperature for too long.
posted by rmd1023 at 11:12 AM on March 1, 2016 [12 favorites]

I've finished 12k words of a fiction project in two weeks after six months of research and now I'm going to eat a burger.
posted by The Whelk at 11:17 AM on March 1, 2016 [23 favorites]

I finally got a license for my chimpangee minkey
posted by My Dad at 11:19 AM on March 1, 2016 [3 favorites]

The biggest news here is that my wife (catastrophewaitress) and I are expecting a baby in April. It's our first, and we're not finding out the baby's sex beforehand, and we're really excited but also nervous, and overwhelmed, and terrified, and happy. Also, I work in a large organization and most people at my job didn't know about our big news, but then we were featured in WaPo mag's Valentine's Day issue, which was weird and fun, and I'm still getting one or two "congrats" from co-workers every day. (Side note: many thanks to PuppetMcSockerson for her wonderful marriage advice in AskMe.)

Other than all that, the main thing going on right now is that I'm kind of in a holding pattern at work. I do nonprofitty office work in the DC area, and it's fine, and I like my co-workers, and it pays decently, but most days I just don't want to be here. I have a hobby I love (homemade ice cream) and for a time, I tried to see if I could spin it into a business, but that didn't work out. I also finished massage school a year ago, and worked as a massage therapist for several months (as a second job) and LOVED it, but with a baby coming, I'm not about to work two jobs if I have a choice--and massage pays poorly, so here I am back at my office job. The good news is, ice cream and massage can still be hobbies, and hobbies are a wonderful luxury that I should be thankful for, but I wish I weren't stuck doing the office-job thing 9 to 5.

But generally things are good! Hooray for good things.
posted by duffell at 11:19 AM on March 1, 2016 [32 favorites]

Our dog has been the focus of my attention for the past few months. She's still very nervous, but getting better every day. She seems most comfortable with me first thing in the morning while I'm still under the covers, so I've been using that time to get her used to treats and attention. She even let me put her leash on her, and she sat patiently on the bed with it on while I fed her treats. It's a pretty big deal for a dog who would immediately pee herself when she saw the leash come out.
posted by backseatpilot at 11:22 AM on March 1, 2016 [18 favorites]

My 8-year old son is big (2nd tallest in his class), beautiful, funny, smart as a whip, gets good grades but doesn't really care, likes going to school, likes hanging out with us, tells me he loves me constantly without any prompting, likes anime and video games, wakes up on school days before us and wakes us up with a big smile on his face and a hug, is generally more tolerant and open minded than his parents and doesn't share in most gender-based idiocy, like gendered toys, cartoons or colors (ie.: he loves MLP:FIM, the color purple, etc.). He also learned how to download and install old-school game ROMs and is currently going through a Pokémon phase.

My wife got what is basically her dream job, and it's actually a little bit better than she thought it would be, plus she just found out she gets a bonus every 3 months which adds up to a 10% raise. She's also finishing her PhD and kicking ass.

We've been together for 15-ish years and going strong, so a few months ago we signed a Vida en Pareja pact, which is the same one they let gay couples do as a proxy for marriage, so we told my son we were getting gay-married, and he thought that meant we were each getting married to somebody of our own gender, so we said yeah, mommy's marrying aunt Alicia and daddy's marrying uncle Stefano (2 friends), and he really liked the idea of having 4 people pamper him instead of 2, except he thought I should marry uncle Roberto, which actually works better because he's actually gay. (Some more good news: uncle Roberto recently won an important film festival award for his first film)
We were married 13 years ago in the US (Manhattan City Hall, natch) and had a big Hermetic ceremony in Chile, presided over by a TV-famous astrologer, so this one was basically for legality's sake and to protect her and my son. Anyway now I have 3 anniversary dates to remember.

And we just got back from a week in Aruba.
posted by signal at 11:26 AM on March 1, 2016 [17 favorites]

1. Our new cat is simultaneously the cutest organism to grace the face of the planet and an idiot (and sometimes a jerk, like at 5:30 this morning), which is fun.

2. Two separate parties just bailed on visiting us in our new digs in Seattle (and meeting the kitty) which is less fun.

3. Work is very busy in ways that are both exhausting and exhilarating but mostly the latter. And I'm also finishing up a project from my PhD that refuses so die in my spare time, so I have no idea why I'm on metafilter.

4. I found out that I am extremely susceptible to imaginary internet points, which means that not only am I flossing and making my bed on a regular basis for the first time in my life but also I have been writing every day, although my word count is puny at the moment because of #3.
posted by quaking fajita at 11:26 AM on March 1, 2016 [11 favorites]

I got notice this weekend that I paid off my second undergrad student loan, and look to be on track to finish off my third (and final!) this year, which means I can start throwing a little more money at my grad loans, and maybe going for a PhD will start to look like something I could actually achieve, if I want it? (I work in a non-academic field where a PhD can actually add value, just to reassure everyone out there who just inhaled sharply and/or shuddered.)
posted by EvaDestruction at 11:27 AM on March 1, 2016 [12 favorites]

Also: I followed the advice I got in this thread and can happily report that my son is fully bilingual in Spanish and English.
posted by signal at 11:29 AM on March 1, 2016 [10 favorites]

I submitted my PhD thesis to the university's examinations office last week. I'm not especially proud of it, it didn't exactly turn out the way I wanted it to, and it's a lot shorter than I thought it would be...but still. It's a thing.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 11:30 AM on March 1, 2016 [31 favorites]

This is my 20th year directing my church's handbell choir.

Got a roommate for the first time in 11+ years. It's working out well, and the money is a Godsend at the moment.

I am keeping the pounds off, for a change.

Despite Metafilter's critique of my dating profile (e.g., it's mostly fine), I have met no one online. Or offline. I continue to cling to the hope that things will change in this department. It makes me crazy on a regular basis.

My mother just turned 75 and is in excellent health. She loves her iPhone 6+.

Life is pretty good.
posted by Melismata at 11:39 AM on March 1, 2016 [18 favorites]

I hope this involves classic Hollywood and I hope it's posted somewhere I can read it someday!

The odds of it being on the front page in a month or two are pretty good.
posted by maxsparber at 11:41 AM on March 1, 2016 [3 favorites]

I think I finished an EP, which should push my "published music" quota in 2016 over two hours. I'll probably put it on Projects once it's done.
posted by lmfsilva at 11:44 AM on March 1, 2016 [6 favorites]

I'm turning 50 on Friday, March 4th and I've started a blog about my boating on the erie canal. I also camp out on the MeFi MST3K club and have nothing but respect for jharris. I've got a wife, and three kids. My birthday is also my anniversary. I built a sailboat and I've worked as a journalist in the past. I cook. I can jump real high and I can do a cartwheel. I make excellent omelets. I can make booze.

I like the mods. I like metafilter. I like Foop. Even when they're all wrong.
posted by valkane at 11:46 AM on March 1, 2016 [17 favorites]

My 1.5 year old son is exhibiting new powers and techniques a few days a week, as guys that age do. Yesterday, he dismounted from the slide by turning onto his stomach (there's a significant gap between the end of the slide and the ground). Then, he climbed up the slide, something he tried a few weeks ago, but did not have enough strength.

This weekend, we went to this playground with a lot of sand that I think of as the Strength Desert. He tried a lot of equipment that requires a lot of strength and failed. But I look forward to bringing him back in the future to dominate everything. However, he was able to go up some unwalled stairs there that he fell off of last time. He also discovered drawing lines with a stick. He literally drew lines in the sand.

metroidbaby and I bought a condo, which is a relief because house hunting is a surprising amount of work, and many aspects of our future are more predictable now.

Work is a bummer for me, but I think I'm being more mature about it than I ever have been in the past.

I continue to have trouble with saying no to projects that I think of, and as a result, I sometimes feel overwhelmed by the number of irons in the fire. They might put out the fire. I'm building a helper to try keep me going in a way in which I continue to do stuff but don't wring my hands over getting everything done and whether I'm using my precious little time perfectly.
posted by ignignokt at 12:00 PM on March 1, 2016 [17 favorites]

I should be working, but I like your lives better.
posted by anotherpanacea at 12:06 PM on March 1, 2016 [19 favorites]

Oh, also, I've started listening to the Manhunter soundtrack on repeat again so this'll probably keep me occupied for another week of my life at least.
posted by phunniemee at 12:12 PM on March 1, 2016 [3 favorites]

I have been the designated bird-catcher in my workplace since I started here. I guess I got the gig because I know the names of many birds? Usually what happens is someone calls and tells me there's a bird in their office, and then when I get there, it flies out the window as soon as I walk in.

Earlier today, though, I got a call from our head honcho's senior assistant and lo, there was a bird in his office! I got there and it was hanging out in a heavy curtain that is kind of behind part of his desk and although I flapped the curtain, it wouldn't leave. I crawled under the desk and managed to catch it - my first office-bird capture! I took it outside and released it into some shrubbery.

It was a chestnut-backed chickadee. It bit me (so adorable!). So that's my day. Pretty good, really.
posted by rtha at 12:12 PM on March 1, 2016 [32 favorites]

rtha is catching birds. Tiny, appetizer-sized birds. Squinting at you real hard there, pal.
posted by phunniemee at 12:16 PM on March 1, 2016 [27 favorites]

I submitted my PhD thesis to the university's examinations office last week. I'm not especially proud of it, it didn't exactly turn out the way I wanted it to, and it's a lot shorter than I thought it would be...but still.

That's always the way. You never finish - you only stop. Still just as huge an accomplishment!
posted by Catseye at 12:16 PM on March 1, 2016 [11 favorites]

I'm stuck in an office where the boss and his bestie are hard-core Trump supporters. They have been repeatedly "cautioned" by the Upper Management to STFU about it, but they continue to go on ALL DAY, quite literally campaigning for Trump at their co-workers and subordinates, and there's nothing anyone will do about it.

Do you have an HR department? Complain to them that your boss is making you uncomfortable with his (I assume, because Trump) political evangelism. Use the magic phrase: "hostile work environment."
posted by dersins at 12:20 PM on March 1, 2016 [6 favorites]

I've been able to hold on to the same pen for two months now and that doesn't sound like a big accomplishment but it's a really nice pen.

My reactions to this comment ran through the usual life cycle, from laughter, to choking on my coffee as a result of said laughter, to waving my co-workers away and trying to tell them I'm fine, to thinking "IT ME," and finally, to realizing I've never actually held onto a pen that long and sadly coming to the conclusion "IT NOT ME."
posted by duffell at 12:20 PM on March 1, 2016 [14 favorites]

what, it was lunchtime and they called me! The boss's office! Can't say no!
posted by rtha at 12:20 PM on March 1, 2016 [5 favorites]

My wife and I will be in San Francisco for just over a week around the first of May. Never been, and really looking forward to it. We're staying with my cousin and his partner.
posted by Thorzdad at 12:22 PM on March 1, 2016 [4 favorites]

Mr. Bad Example: I submitted my PhD thesis to the university's examinations office last week.

Congratulations! Ask the mods for a one-time name change to Dr. Bad Example!

While I'm at it:

My little baby is turning four - four! - tomorrow; I'm one of 1559 co-authors (yes, one thousand five hundred and fifty nine of us) on a paper about the search for a counterpart to the LIGO event, which was just submitted to the Astrophysical Journal; I'm buzzing with excitement about a press release for a (different) paper in Nature tomorrow, and Joe Palca, the science correspondent for NPR, called me up to chat!

It doesn't make up for the Trumpocalypse, but we'll go out in style, at least.
posted by RedOrGreen at 12:37 PM on March 1, 2016 [19 favorites]

I'm on day 7 of the first stage of treatment for bipolar II, GAD, and OCD and even though the dose is pretty low so far, I am happier and experiencing genuine emotions for the first time in forever.

Also, I started reading Outlander and it's excellent, so there's that, too.
posted by Hermione Granger at 12:37 PM on March 1, 2016 [35 favorites]

i expect everyone having babies to post a Name This New Baby askme so i can yell PRUNE 100 times
posted by poffin boffin at 12:38 PM on March 1, 2016 [7 favorites]

"PRUNE 100 times" is an excellent name for a baby.
posted by chonus at 12:41 PM on March 1, 2016 [16 favorites]

would u rather fight 100 prune sized babies or 1 baby sized prune
posted by phunniemee at 12:42 PM on March 1, 2016 [29 favorites]

I like valkane. Even when I'm totally wrong.

And if you're going to post a Name This New Baby askme, I insist AGAINST considering the name "Wendell", even as a joke. I am living proof of the psychic damage that causes.
posted by oneswellfoop at 12:44 PM on March 1, 2016 [4 favorites]

I'm looking forward to the first ever MeFi meetup in my city. There's only 4 of us so far, but hey, if anyone lives in Kingston, Ontario, and doesn't have their location set and missed the notice, come visit the thread here .

Otherwise life is mostly the same, I need a better job, more money. I am having fun getting back into the local queer scene but it also reminds me of how much of an absolute meat market it can be. Oh well, at least I'm prime rib and not ground chuck, from the reaction given.
posted by the uncomplicated soups of my childhood at 12:44 PM on March 1, 2016 [6 favorites]

With each new dawn, I am one step closer to death.
posted by briank at 12:49 PM on March 1, 2016 [5 favorites]

I'm looking forward to the first ever MeFi meetup in my city.

I've only been to a few IRL events, but I've always had a lovely time! MeFites are good quality.
posted by duffell at 12:50 PM on March 1, 2016 [1 favorite]

I found out I really like gose beer.
posted by prize bull octorok at 12:54 PM on March 1, 2016 [3 favorites]

My 1.5 year old son is exhibiting new powers and techniques a few days a week, as guys that age do.

Basically this guy is the best guy and it is fascinating to watch him learn. He's learning his colors and numbers, but his grasp of the concept is currently outpacing his language. If you put a bunch of different colored blocks in front of him and ask him to point to the green one, he'll do it correctly, but if you ask him what color the green block is, he'll say "blue!" If you give him two of something and ask him how many he has, he'll correctly say "two," but if you give him three, you can almost see him thinking "well, I know it's not two but that's the only word I've got right now."
posted by Metroid Baby at 12:58 PM on March 1, 2016 [27 favorites]

I am leaving on vacation on Friday where Mr. Sophie and I will be taking the Coast Starlight to Seattle in first class like a couple of swells. It's a birthday present so apparently we're also doing something fun in Seattle which I will be surprised by.

I am on a team of people who are actually getting shit done regarding informing women about biomedical HIV prevention (PrEP). It's pretty incredible to be on an efficient and effective team.

I did a bee cutout on Sunday that could have been a total shitshow but the bees were surprisingly docile (esp. since they are Africanized) and despite completely ruining their home, they actually followed the queen into their new home and are (so far) happy and rebuilding.

My sister is being a total bitch.

That's about it.
posted by Sophie1 at 1:03 PM on March 1, 2016 [15 favorites]

I'm finishing up about a month and a half of research at a lab where I've been extracting hormones from all the monkey poop I liberated from the rainforest, as well as monkey poop which other people liberated from zoos for me (with permission). Today, I gave myself a pipetting blister! A few weeks back, I found out I got a grant to do some research on parasites infecting a different species of monkey in the same place as my dissertation research - looking at a few groups in the forest core, and a group that ranges through a town and some farmland. I've got a whole new set of literature and methods to learn, and I'm planning a trip back to Cote d'Ivoire to collect this data! I'm getting ready for a few conferences (Atlanta mefites! Chicago mefites!) and trying desperately to find a job/postdoc while I finish up my dissertation.

In addition to all that academic stuff, I've spent time with some great mefites in the past month, learned a sexy Brazilian dance, and hiked on a small portion of the Appalachian trail! Although I think I've been less productive than my advisor would like me to have been, I feel like I've had a pretty good past month. However, I'm looking forward to returning home to ballet class and my horrible catbeast Triceratops soon!
posted by ChuraChura at 1:04 PM on March 1, 2016 [37 favorites]

would u rather fight 100 prune sized babies or 1 baby sized prune

which ones are more delicious
posted by poffin boffin at 1:05 PM on March 1, 2016 [2 favorites]

In January my doctor found a thing and then a couple of weeks ago I had surgery to remove the thing and the thing turned out to be not so scary and the surgery recovery is going well and now I have one less thing to worry about.
posted by Room 641-A at 1:06 PM on March 1, 2016 [47 favorites]

ChuraChura, Triceratops is one of the best cat names I've ever heard, along with Toast, and Major Crimes.
posted by duffell at 1:07 PM on March 1, 2016 [10 favorites]

After two years I finally reached my weight loss goal (50 lbs), thus reversing blood pressure, triglycerides, cholesterol and blood sugar from marginally bad to really good. In the process I've discovered that I really, really like hiking, biking and running, and that there is an amazing national park 10 minutes from my home/work that is beyond perfect for such activities. I've also been consistently shooting above 550 in my bowling league for the past month, which is a huge improvement over the last few years.
posted by slogger at 1:08 PM on March 1, 2016 [17 favorites]

My firstborn, who struggled and struggled with sensory processing issues, ADHD, a smattering of Asperger's, severe social anxiety, and giftedness (if you don't know why that particular one is a struggle, well, good on you) went off to college 500 miles away in the fall and he made Dean's List first semester! And he has friends! Who took him off campus to celebrate his birthday and wouldn't let him pay for anything! Seriously, it's the best possible thing and I am BURSTING with happiness about it.

Also, I got a job in October after 10 months of unemployment following a truly unjustified termination from a job I loved. This new job is even better and I'm making a difference and I seriously work with the kindest, most thoughtful people. I can't believe my good fortune and I'm kind of waiting for something bad to happen? But maybe it won't.

My daughter is turning 16 and we're throwing her a party that's going to be SO FUN and I really like all of her friends. That's kind of a big deal as a parent. You hope your kids make good choices and surround themselves with good, nice people, and she really has. Also, she's a pretty good driver!

My middle brother got married in September, and it was the first time I got to spend serious time with my sister who I didn't know was my sister till a couple years ago and she's really fun and nice and smart and we've been bonding through texts and phone calls and it's really weird and nice and I like it.

Congratulations, condolences, hang-in-theres....whatever applies to you, you've got it.
posted by cooker girl at 1:08 PM on March 1, 2016 [35 favorites]

I had the honor and delight of being the celebrant at the wedding of two friends a couple of weeks ago. I have never been in any wedding other than my own, never a bridesmaid, not in my siblings' weddings, and so this was a banner event under any circumstances. But this couple are as dear to me as if they were my own children -- I call them the children of my heart -- so that made it even more special.

The groom is Indian and his mom was initially against any wedding that wasn't the full on Vedic ceremony. One day, however, she and the groom's dad had a docent tour of our Asian Art Museum. She was so impressed with the docent that she asked afterwards what her credentials were -- had she studied Asian art in school? No, the docent said, I was a lawyer before I retired, so I've just put my research skills to good use. The mom got home and called the groom and said, "It's fine with me for Jane to perform your wedding." (Both families were extremely warm and gracious to me, by the way, don't get the wrong impression from that anecdote)

So we did a 45 minute ceremony that incorporated the most significant of the Vedic rituals and also included a humanist slant.

It could not have gone better. I received so many compliments from so many people, of every age and state of life. I think it was, if not *the* high point of my life, then certainly *a* high point of my life.

Here is a picture of me as celebrant, in the sari that was loaned to me by the groom's mother.
posted by janey47 at 1:09 PM on March 1, 2016 [29 favorites]

I started eating better and working out and I'm down 17 pounds! My husband is down an equally awesome amount and my oh-so-sedentary body is ....well, sore from working out but ... feeling stronger. I have a long way to go but still.

I have finally given up on trying to have a baby. It was a long slog (2 different marriages, vague ¯\_(ツ)_/¯diagnoses, etc) but I'm moving on. It's sad, and I am sad. But it's so freeing to finally do "things" on my *own* schedule and stop spending money on sticks and pokes. If it happens, it happens, but I am 43 now and I reallllly think it's not going to happen so it's time for me to play the hand I've been dealt, so to speak. The room I've been doing nothing with because of hopes is going to become a craft room. I have a Love, some great dogs, a lovely home. Life is going to be okay.

Even if I'm quiet here, I get a lot of good advice and support from you guys, and am appreciative and grateful for you all.
posted by kimberussell at 1:11 PM on March 1, 2016 [36 favorites]

I'm starting a two-month, 16-hour-a-week French class tonight. I have a feeling it's going to be exhausting, but hopefully by the end of it I'll be able to stop being terrified of people talking to me whenever I leave the house.
posted by Dr. Send at 1:11 PM on March 1, 2016 [10 favorites]

I didn't get to really name my current cat (whose previous keeper only called KittyCat, so I, in a salute to junk food, shortened to KitCat), but I was so tempted to call her Grover Cleveland, because (1) if Garfield works, why not another 19th century president? (2) I was born in Cleveland, Ohio and now reside a few miles from Grover Beach, California (3) two NON-consecutive terms, that's persistence, and this cat has it too.
posted by oneswellfoop at 1:14 PM on March 1, 2016 [10 favorites]

posted by chonus at 1:18 PM on March 1, 2016 [5 favorites]

I took part in my first ever political protest march, some 5000 university people protesting against the sudden drop in funding from the Veracruz state govt.
posted by dhruva at 1:27 PM on March 1, 2016 [10 favorites]

After tiptoeing around it for a ridiculously long time, I've finally picked out a tattoo artist and set a date to get the tattoo of my dog's paw that was the basis of my first AskMe question ... seven years ago ... Gonna have it done in a watercolor-y combination of my favorite color and the color of her favorite frisbee - it's still about six weeks out but I'm excited!

Also last week I discovered that you can grow a loofah in your own actual garden and my mind is still kind of blown. The package assures me that they are "astonishingly tasty" when picked young; "EAT A SPONGE" has become my favorite insult as of late.
posted by DingoMutt at 1:33 PM on March 1, 2016 [27 favorites]

I have learned to almost like spaghetti squash and now love jicama. Two new vegetables in one year - that's a record!

My son finished his chemotherapy and so far all his scans are clear - fingers crossed but everyone is optimistic. [No evil eye, poo poo poo]

I am starting to come to terms with the almost-certain fact that I'll never have a second child, but it's still breaking my heart.

My novel came out this past August and strangers are emailing me to say they liked it - not just people I know who have to be nice to me! And I couldn't have done it without help from MeFi - so thanks everyone who answered all my questions and helped keep me going.
posted by Mchelly at 1:33 PM on March 1, 2016 [34 favorites]

The vintage chairs (I guess you folks might call them mid-century modern or some such term) that I re-upholstered seven years ago were getting uncomfortable. Yesterday and today I took them apart, took the fabric off from the seat part, added a slab of good quality foam, put the fabric back on, repaired some things (a broken spring), put the chairs back together.
Comfort: restored.
posted by Too-Ticky at 1:37 PM on March 1, 2016 [14 favorites]

I sold a short story :)
Not to any famous publication or anything, but still, it's my first!!
posted by wintersweet at 1:40 PM on March 1, 2016 [42 favorites]

I am finally really getting ready to sell my house and move...I'm not sure what or where exactly. I'm 90% sure it will be a 2 to 3 flat so I can defray some of my housing costs. One thing I have learned is to live frugally as the future is unknown. As soon as the baby is on her own (+/- 3 yrs) I can do whatever, but for now it's nose to the grindstone, keeping us afloat. My ex celebrated his 60th by getting laid off, so school, etc will have to be all me. I am glad to be employed in a not so sucky job making middle class bucks for a change.

My mother fell and broke her wrist last night and this morning I floated the idea that perhaps she could live with me, expecting her usual 'leaving my house feet first' response. She joked about our future roomie status instead. GULP. I lived my original misspent youth with my mother looking on disapprovingly, not exactly something I'd like to relive. But srsly, I doubt she'd be willing to make that change. She's a tough old bird and is fiercely private.

But all in all we're happy and healthy and busy. My grandson is two and I'm just about his favorite person. I had a very special relationship with my grandparents and it is lovely to pass it on. His birth was fraught as my daughter was estranged and in a worrisome place, but she is back in the fold, in school with grad school plans.
posted by readery at 1:43 PM on March 1, 2016 [8 favorites]

I made really delicious meatballs this weekend, plus some great pasta sauce without a recipe. I finally found perfect curtains for my apartment after 6 months of looking and 3 different sets.

My latest performance review at work was glowing and one of my direct reports called me the "team mom", because I'm good at giving advice and always checking in with everyone to see if they need help. Since I'm 36 and probably not going to have my own kids, I'm really enjoying the idea of continuing to manage this team of fresh college graduates and help them with their problems (both work and life). I realized that being a mom to 22-28 year-olds is a lot easier than dealing with toddlers. Most of the time.

My boyfriend is wonderful in every way, I get to live in NYC after wanting to be here all my life, and I have lots of really great shoes. Life is good.
posted by elvissa at 1:48 PM on March 1, 2016 [7 favorites]

I was the sole engineer on a product that launched yesterday and a big blog in my industry did a story about it. I'm going on maternity leave in two weeks and sooooo glad the launch got out the door before I did.
posted by town of cats at 1:53 PM on March 1, 2016 [19 favorites]

Also I just found out that there's a guy who:
- looks a lot like my cousin
- has the same first and last name as my cousin
- goes to the same university as my cousin, but in a different department

I don't know why this has me so worried but it just feels like the start of a Philip K Dick short story or something
posted by town of cats at 1:54 PM on March 1, 2016 [16 favorites]

you guys, there is so much streaming music on Google Music it is stupid.
posted by Going To Maine at 1:58 PM on March 1, 2016 [1 favorite]

posted by Going To Maine at 1:59 PM on March 1, 2016 [4 favorites]

I like reading all these updates!

All my things are emotional right now: My big thing is that I have a bunch of career-angst baggage that I've been carrying around for a long time and I'm finally actively doing something about getting rid of it and it is scary but feels good. Very grateful for therapy and good friends and family that are helping me grow.

Also I'm pretty sure I'm finally past the shittiest part of dealing with a recent breakup, so I'm looking forward to a spring of moving on & being happy.

This feels like a year that is going to be full of a lot of emotional upheaval and hard work, but I can tell there are really good things on the other side of all that hard work, so I am rarin' to get at it.
posted by aka burlap at 2:00 PM on March 1, 2016 [9 favorites]

Oh, and I've just applied to rescue a dog! (Yes, one has to apply here. They can be strict.) No idea whether they'll consider me suitable, but fingers crossed!
posted by A Robot Ninja at 2:03 PM on March 1, 2016 [7 favorites]

I don't have anything flashy and exciting to report like babies or dentistry or upholstery, and I'll be honest with you: this thread was starting to depress me a little because of that. But I figure I could use the hugs, so I'll mention that my 15-year-old's surprise birthday party went off without a hitch, I've been for a walk/jog 3 of the last 4 days, and I got a big thank you from someone at work for doing my job really well, so at least that's something in the face of the general blech that's been going on lately.
posted by Rock Steady at 2:05 PM on March 1, 2016 [34 favorites]

Mr. Machine finished radiation for cancer yesterday and got to ring the bell and everything. He's spending today lying about the house in blissful NOT GETTING OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR ANYTHING LET ALONE EXHAUSTING RADIATION, AND THANK GOD MY CHEMO FLASHBACKS ARE FINALLY LETTING UP.

Despite the fact that we have delicious homemade gumbo for dinner, I just went and got a bag of Cheetos from the vending machine at work.

Because that's just how I roll.
posted by joyceanmachine at 2:08 PM on March 1, 2016 [23 favorites]

my 15-year-old's surprise birthday party went off without a hitch

FWIW, I am way too nervous about screwing up a surprise party to ever attempt one, and am always impressed when I see it pulled off successfully.
posted by duffell at 2:10 PM on March 1, 2016 [2 favorites]

I joined metafilter!

posted by pittcatt at 2:17 PM on March 1, 2016 [64 favorites]

My woodcut/blockprints are going to be up on the walls of a local cafe in June. I recently went by to take a look at the wall space and have been SORT OF FREAKING OUT for the past week.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 2:27 PM on March 1, 2016 [23 favorites]

I'm now a staff producer at [internationally-recognized and influential public radio station] after three years of hustling and freelancing and working two jobs to get there. Yesterday was my last day at [toxic awful former employer], and I'm work-from-home at this new gig ... so today I'm in that terrifying/exhilarating netherworld of learning how to both (a) work from a place that also houses my cat and all the things I've been trying to find time to clean, and (b) relax out of my crazy stressful workaholic high-pressure nightmare of the last few years and trust that I can just get things done.
posted by mykescipark at 2:29 PM on March 1, 2016 [28 favorites]

((((Rock Steady)))) Good job with the party and jogging and getting helpful things done at work!
posted by EvaDestruction at 2:34 PM on March 1, 2016 [4 favorites]

Okay, something above and beyond Exploding Kittens:

After an ungodly 10+ years of job instability, I'm finally in a place where I think I can stay. I had the first performance review here recently (only the second one of those things in my life), and basically the boss thinks the sun shines out of my ass, so that's okay.

The only problem is that I hate the actual work itself. But even HERE there is hope - there is the possibility that another position in this very office, one that is much more suited to my talents and ability, will be opening up; and what's more, I'm already been doing some of the work for that position, and my boss knows this; and is probably going to be that much more inclined to tug on someone's sleeve and say "hey, rather than recruiting someone new, why not just slide EC on into that spot?"

Although if she suggests it as something to do on top of what I am already doing, as opposed to instead of what I am already doing, I will rageflip my entire cubicle and push her out the window
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 2:46 PM on March 1, 2016 [7 favorites]

I have a hobby research project that is ultimately intended to end up as a book. It focuses on this real-person guy who had a vaudeville act with his wife and three young daughters in the early 1900s. He was always a bit of a schemer. (Oh, let's be honest, he was an embezzler and an outright larcenous petty thief.) His wife finally left him after he was caught stealing a diamond watch from a then-famous vaudeville vamp (who punched him at the nose at the police precinct). He went on to become a famous serial bigamist who repeatedly, habitually, compulsively married rich widows and then absconded with their jewels. (Like, on a weekly basis, and on more than one continent.) I know, and can tell, his basic story, but I've always wanted to find a living relative to see if I can also get some family dirt, or correspondence, or something. Last week, I managed to locate his great-granddaughter (the granddaughter of one of his vaudeville-performing daughters) and have had an email back-and-forth with her. She had no idea he even existed -- let alone that he was nationwide front-page news several times. Apparently his daughters never spoke of him again, and this woman's family knew nothing about their mother/grandmother's background.

This will now make the third time in my life that I have contacted an internet stranger and told them something about their family history that they did not know. I'm like the Ed McMahon of internet research: I show up out of the blue holding this big cardboard prop that says HELLO YOU DON'T KNOW ME BUT THERE WAS A MAJOR SCANDAL IN YOUR FAMILY TREE LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT IT. I'm really creepy, basically.

Also, there's this nagging, whiskery hair on my jawline that's been attracting my thumb for days and I just eradicated it with the tweezers from my Swiss army knife. Take that, nuisance hair!!
posted by mudpuppie at 2:49 PM on March 1, 2016 [29 favorites]

I've got a job interview this week.
This is both bad (can't get anything else done) and good (hey yes I would like a job).
Mostly I'd like it to be over though, because, well, look at me still worrying when there's science to do.
posted by nat at 2:58 PM on March 1, 2016 [11 favorites]

I've learned that I'm going to have open-heart surgery on March 17th, and I am frankly terrified.
posted by pjern at 3:05 PM on March 1, 2016 [43 favorites]

Hugs if you want them, pjern. We love you.
posted by ocherdraco at 3:17 PM on March 1, 2016 [27 favorites]

Work has been killing me this whole year: we're short-staffed and busier than usual with our regular work, and on top of that it's the time of year when I should be spending most of my time training new staff. It's been ugly and I've been feeling stressed and under-appreciated.

So I noticed an ad for a very similar job to mine, that paid a lot more - and was in the public sector whereas we're private. It's fixed-term so I won't be applying, but I casually mentioned it to my boss, like 'I don't know if you're interested in benchmarking salaries to make the case for us, but did you see this?'. Her response was that she agreed, she'd already been doing it, and she'd managed to convince her manager that she was right, and we could expect some good news soon.

And I killed my training session this morning, which was nice.

And I'm training for my first ultramarathon. I have no idea if I can do it or not, but that's kinda the point I think....
posted by Pink Frost at 4:08 PM on March 1, 2016 [3 favorites]

I have Mexican food being delivered to my front door. I have no doubt that it will be delicious and that I will enjoy it thoroughly.
posted by tzikeh at 4:47 PM on March 1, 2016 [1 favorite]

I'm going to my first civic hackathon this weekend - Open Data Day in DC. Find me and say hi if you are there too.
posted by COD at 4:50 PM on March 1, 2016 [4 favorites]

I'm going on vacation day after next, on my very favorite annual trip to see some Imaginary Internet Friends I otherwise don't see the rest of the year, and I am super super excited.

Also I just had a birthday (am 37 now, which I thought would make me old and wise but so far I appear to be old and foolish), a promotion, and some really good massaman curry for dinner. And the tiny weird fandom cult I have spent the past six months amassing in my tiny weird fandom of choice is really nice and wrote me a fuckton of birthday fanfic and so my life continues to be weird but basically good. Also basically entirely unlike whatever I would have imagined a good life to be, if you'd asked me as a kid, which I find kind of delightful.
posted by Stacey at 4:50 PM on March 1, 2016 [9 favorites]

Good luck, pjern and nat! And all other endeavorers!
posted by ignignokt at 5:07 PM on March 1, 2016 [1 favorite]

I am in the middle of booking a trip to the Greek islands for July, about which I am ridiculously excited.

My neighbour was friendly yesterday and complimented my cat.

My colleague just found exciting results in a dataset we collected together and which I was sure would be useless. I got the email five minutes ago.

And a radio interview I did last week seems to have sparked a run on my latest book, so my publisher is happy.

This week is going awesome, you guys!

Although the cat brought in a mouse yesterday and put it INSIDE my duvet cover for me to find later, so there's that.
posted by lollusc at 5:23 PM on March 1, 2016 [7 favorites]

I just got back from a lovely vacation in Charleston, SC! I ate a ton of good food, drank some beers, drank some moonshine, met a nice MeFite, petted a dog, petted a shark, petted a historical cannon, and spent a lot of time staring at architecture. It was my first time traveling completely solo and I would do it again for sure, even though my duffel bag broke.
posted by capricorn at 5:27 PM on March 1, 2016 [6 favorites]

I ate it and am fine.
posted by Ideefixe at 5:40 PM on March 1, 2016 [9 favorites]

For the first time in two years, I have a haircut I don't hate.

It's a good fing.
posted by Michele in California at 5:41 PM on March 1, 2016 [8 favorites]

Kind of excited about an FOIA request pending to see if the FBI had anything on my great great uncle, a bootlegger with possible mafia ties. And I'm hoping this post will finally get me into the double digits of +s. Fingers crossed! :)
posted by soakimbo at 5:42 PM on March 1, 2016 [14 favorites]

Downer time! I went to a new pain management doctor today. He apparently doesn't believe in pain medication. He commented on how much pain I was in and said "nobody should be in that much pain! Why are you in so much pain?!" As he is poking and prodding me. I asked if he was familiar with my genetic diagnosis and he said no but..............people who have my condition don't have as much pain as I do. Okaaaay. Apparently I need to exercise more, do yoga and go to a chiropractor. Never mind that my genetic diagnosis is a connective tissue disorder and my joints dislocate all the time. He wanted to take me off all my meds and just deal with it because he can't cure me. I run out of pain meds at the end of the month and I am terrified.
posted by futz at 5:44 PM on March 1, 2016 [9 favorites]

I have a hobby research project that is ultimately intended to end up as a book. It focuses on this real-person guy who had a vaudeville act with his wife and three young daughters in the early 1900s...

I was sure this was going to end up being an aristocrats! thing.
posted by stinkfoot at 5:53 PM on March 1, 2016 [1 favorite]

I've been decluttering for the past year, with much more to go (I took off much of the fall and winter), and am loving my place more now that it's more orderly.

I recently found out (like, in the past few minutes, that two of the MeFite couples in a gathering are expecting children, so, yay! It was a nice gathering, and I say that as someone who is terrified meeting new people.

Also, I've read good amounts of good advice here, and elsewhere, and it's life-changing, so thank you for that.
posted by SillyShepherd at 5:54 PM on March 1, 2016 [5 favorites]

I run out of pain meds at the end of the month and I am terrified.

futz, enormous if-consensual hug and all the psychic support an internet friend can send. I hope you find better care.
posted by not that girl at 6:01 PM on March 1, 2016 [11 favorites]

Hey, guys. You know that service unit meeting I was talking about up there, my first one as the service unit manager? Yeah, no one came.
posted by phunniemee at 6:04 PM on March 1, 2016 [7 favorites]

I made a brand-new zine, with a lot of thanks to the emotional labor thread! I'd had that piece of writing kicking around for years, but the EL thread gave me some new ways to frame it and a story that appears in the zine.

Today I showed a 12 year-old who's been in the psychiatric crisis response center for six days (while she waits to get admitted to an inpatient unit) how to find her radial pulse. She felt it, smiled for a bit, and told me "that's decent." Considering this same child refused to give me her name yesterday, and then charged at her mother and told her to go fuck herself later that afternoon, I'll call that a victory.
posted by ActionPopulated at 6:28 PM on March 1, 2016 [10 favorites]

if you want to hold the meeting here right now instead we're all already here
posted by poffin boffin at 6:46 PM on March 1, 2016 [12 favorites]

I had some disease the doctor described as "Influenza A" last week, which sucked. Hooray for antivirals.

And I blocked metafilter in my work computer's hosts.txt file for like the 12th time because work is slow but I really do have to do it while at work. And I have no willpower.
posted by GuyZero at 7:32 PM on March 1, 2016 [5 favorites]

Mrs. Wallflower and I were able to spend most of the winter in SE Asia and Indonesia, traveling with our son and his awesome girlfriend. My PSA remains undetectable five years out from surgery and rads. I'm leaving my current band because of surprising ego issues and hoping to start another soon with less drama. I still eat way too much sugar.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:38 PM on March 1, 2016 [5 favorites]

futz and pjern, may your outcomes be optimal. Hang in there.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:40 PM on March 1, 2016 [9 favorites]

if you want to hold the meeting here right now instead we're all already here

Yeah, I brought bagels and printed out the agenda and everything.
posted by Rock Steady at 7:41 PM on March 1, 2016 [2 favorites]

Ok, so I'm homeless. I'm working on this one massive music project that will take 5 - 10 years but will get me out of my homelessness. It's software that generates music but with a couple of huge twists. Won't go into details here but you can find more info if you want.

So my computer is my life. It's my project, it's my way out of homelessness. I keep my laptop in a backpack (brand new -- saved up my pennies for it). Also in my backpack: ebook reader, Arne Jacobsen silverware, compass, games for my 3DS, headphones, batteries, various cables, external hard drive, toiletries, medicine bag, HP 50G calculator, stainless steel water bottle, sanitizer, mechanical pocket watch, journal of the work I've done on my project and other stuff.

There's this church that serves free coffee and cookies to people three times a week. For some reason the only one from the church to show up and set up the coffee stand is this one 78 year old man. My commute into town (from where I camp out) takes me by the coffee stand about the time he shows up (6:30 am). Since he's by himself I stop by and help set up.

It's not my church. Heck, I'm an atheist. But the folk at the stand have always been nice to me so I don't mind helping out, volunteering if you will. I don't even drink the coffee or eat the cookies. I just help set up, chat for a bit, and then continue on into the city.

So one morning we were setting up and a semi-regular showed up. Noticeably a little mentally unbalanced but he does have a place to live (somewhere in the neighborhood). We got him some coffee and went back to setting up at which point he walked away with my backpack.

As you can imagine I was devastated. That backpack contained the only thing that makes my life meaningful. And spoiler, two weeks later and all the stuff is still gone.

Fortunately the 78 year old man is a fairly well-off retiree. He went out and bought me a new backpack (the exact same one I had just bought) and a laptop from a pawn shop that's actually nicer than what I had. He didn't have to do all this but I think he felt guilty.

Interestingly the church didn't. While I didn't expect anything monetarily from them at least maybe they would make sure someone else from the church would be there to help set up instead of the homeless atheist. Oh well.

Fortunately all my software was backed up online (gitlab) so the project continues. But the rest of the stuff I'll never see again. Interestingly it was the mementos from my previous life of comfort that I miss most like the silverware. I'm sure I'll get another ebook reader soon enough but some of those items are irreplaceable in any realistic way.

So the guy with the home stole from the homeless guy. Awesome.

My backpack is lighter which I guess is a good thing. In some sense of the word.

I was never angry and don't want revenge. I just want my things back. Things that guy will have no use for and won't be able to get any money for.

Something about no good deeds.

But really, I'm much better. And the new laptop is really very nice. Eg, the keys on the keyboard aren't entirely worn through, yet.
posted by bfootdav at 8:17 PM on March 1, 2016 [34 favorites]

I had better luck with the "chicken waffle sliders" made out of mini-Eggos and chicken nuggets

This sounds absolutely perfect for a certain kind of evening. I am so jealous.

My only update is that I put on my big boy pants and finally took care of a minor but (irrationally) embarrassing medical issue that I had been ignoring for a long time. It took cycling through three different GPs to find one who listened and took me seriously, then a few too many lab tests, and then finally getting a referral to what turned out to be a really good specialist, with a lot of delays and expenses along the way. It was a reminder of how hard it can be to access good health care even for something minor, but it feels really good to finally be done with it and moving on.
posted by Dip Flash at 8:45 PM on March 1, 2016 [6 favorites]

I did some Hard Level Parenting over the past couple of days and I feel really good about it.

I've lost sixty-five pounds in the past two years.

I am a much, MUCH better musician than I used to be; I am almost starting to believe that I might be somewhere near as good as people seem to think I am.
posted by KathrynT at 8:46 PM on March 1, 2016 [18 favorites]


I spent four hours today at Town Meeting and ate pizza for 30 minutes and then spent eight hours working the polls and counting ballots. I helped people vote, answered questions, was minorly amusing and literally ate nothing but pizza and donuts and brownies and coffee all day. In chatting with fellow poll workers, I had some useful conversations about why voter ID is bullshit (we don't have it in Vermont) and some other useful social justice topics in a nice friendly way. I got to contact a few friends of mine in town with the fresh results and tell them they had gotten elected (otherwise they'd have to wait until town hall opened tomorrow) and my town went for Bernie ten to one over Hilary (and would have been more but a suspicious number of hippies were voting for Kasich). It can be tough to live in a small town sometimes but days like this make it all worth it.

I also went to a conference this weekend called Beyond Comments and heard over and over again that MetaFilter was one of the one places people felt had decent comments still, so yay everyone.

Congrats to people who had successes and hugs and support to those who need it. This is a nice idea for a htread.
posted by jessamyn (retired) at 8:55 PM on March 1, 2016 [16 favorites]

Wow, there's a whole conference on comments. Who knew.
posted by GuyZero at 9:37 PM on March 1, 2016 [1 favorite]

I'm taking extended time off work to get some intensive treatment for mental health stuff. It's scary and hard but my partner and friends tell me things are getting better even if I don't always believe it. Thanks for this thread and for MeFi for giving me a space to talk about these issues, since I don't always want to go on about them in real life.
posted by thetortoise at 9:46 PM on March 1, 2016 [14 favorites]

Last year was a tough one for me and my family, as a friend, my 103 year old grandfather, my mother-in-law, and our horse died. Metafilter was a godsend during the days I say for endless hours in various waiting rooms. I don't post often, but am a religious reader, so it's lovely to hear what you all are doing.
This year may also be tough, but for positive reasons. My wife and I are planning to build a house on our property where our existing double wide is. We recently bought a sweet 1968 airstream to live in during the summer when there is no house, and we got our initial plans from the architect yesterday. I'm also doing a test year of running a CSA for my close friends. I grew an obscene amount of vegetables last year, even in the midst of all the tragedy (and a hail storm on transplant day), so I figure with a little extra effort I should be able to do even better this year.
Oh yeah, I quit my toxic library job last year (our university is not doing so hot under current management - you may have read about it in the recent book by Krakauer), and am now working just for myself at my wee book repair business. It is scary and super satisfying.
posted by ikahime at 10:03 PM on March 1, 2016 [11 favorites]

I bought a pint of ginger molasses cookie ice cream for $1. Also I'm in the process of fixing a chronic sleep problem! So I may soon know the feeling of having energy without a bunch of caffeine, but for now I'm settling for the feeling of having ginger molasses cookie ice cream.
posted by knuckle tattoos at 10:03 PM on March 1, 2016 [8 favorites]

ikahime, best wishes to you and your family. Sounds like a great project and something I'd love do. And extra neato on the airstream. I hope you have air conditioning, good veggie weather, and low stress.
posted by futz at 10:16 PM on March 1, 2016 [1 favorite]

Ok, I looked at your profile pic. You'll do just fine.
posted by futz at 10:22 PM on March 1, 2016 [6 favorites]

Yesterday I got the "Thanks but no thanks" from the phone interview I had last week. It was the first response to a resume I've received since I lost my job over the summer. My partner and I are both currently without any expected income, and we're down to $300 from cashing in the last of our IRAs. We're behind on all the bills, and I suspect we'll lose the house soon. The car lost its brakes last weekend, and will be $1600 to repair, so we won't even have that to live in. So far, turning 50 has not been so nifty. I have never been this frightened in my life.

I have not yet completely lost my shit, so that is a positive.
posted by conic at 10:36 PM on March 1, 2016 [18 favorites]

I'm 2/3rds through my first year in my PhD program, and have a pretty balanced mix of trepidation, excitement and exhaustion as May approaches (and with it, picking a thesis lab and staring down preliminary exams). I think I have some good options lined up, but the idea of (mutually) picking a boss for the next 4ish years of my life remains kind of scary. The actually work is super satisfying, though, so I must be doing something right.
posted by deludingmyself at 10:44 PM on March 1, 2016 [5 favorites]

The score in our yard is currently Vallhunds 2, Small Mammals 0.

With any luck biscotti and I will have a litter of puppies (actual canine puppies, not cutesy-isms for hoo-man infants) this summer. Well, Zhora will have them, and biscotti will manage the food-ape side of the whole process, and I will do minor smart-like-tractor things and pat them. If there's somewhere appropriate here to do so I'll throw a link to the inevitable webcam up when the time comes.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 10:58 PM on March 1, 2016 [8 favorites]

I turned 40 in January. My period has returned a year after Peanut #2's arrival. Subsequently I have a raging case of hormonal zits the likes I which I haven't had since I figured out I was allergic to hairspray in my teens. At 40. Meh.

After our third trip stateside, Hubs has been brought over to the dark side of American household appliances. We now have a brand new dryer to match the brand new washer. I haven't had a dryer in my 18 years of living in Italy - it's heady stuff, yo.
posted by romakimmy at 11:05 PM on March 1, 2016 [8 favorites]

I had a baby a week ago today. Congratulations to my wife! It is 3am here.
posted by Potomac Avenue at 12:10 AM on March 2, 2016 [37 favorites]

My husband got an awesome new job with some great built-in promotion potential!

In DC. When we live in Louisiana. So, he's bored in our new, empty apartment up there, while I'm tearing my hair out trying to pack our house and prepare it for sale and take care of two sick toddlers and work my 50 hour a week job and train a new person to do it.

I do get to announce that I'm leaving at a meeting at work tomorrow, which will take some of the stress off the top.
posted by Night_owl at 12:42 AM on March 2, 2016 [5 favorites]

I hit the big One Zero and am very excited about being in double digits. I'm also having the requisite existential crisis, but so far managing to avoid buying red sports cars or quitting my job. I still blog about virtual fashion and art. Said existential crisis is making writing on my blog significantly harder.

I recently got lectured by friends on dating a guy at work because he's a geek and so am I, and to them my hobbies were significantly rare that I should date the one other person they know who has those interests. I was less convinced. On a more positive romance note, Deadpool beat out He's Just Not That Into You as my favorite RomCom of all time, and I plan to see it again soon because it made me ridiculously happy. I also spent way too much money on green tea, but in my defense it is very tasty green tea and also it is not a red sports car.
posted by Deoridhe at 12:49 AM on March 2, 2016 [11 favorites]

Green tea is said to be really good for you, so I'd say: keep on keeping on.
posted by Too-Ticky at 12:52 AM on March 2, 2016

I've taken on a reduced course load due to disability status so I don't completely fail out of my fancy university. I was so reluctant to do it, but literally everyone around me thought it was a good idea. It feels like a weird thing to celebrate, but I'm really happy I did it. It's like I can stop punishing myself.

Also, it's kind of forcing me to rethink the whole "get a 4.0 at a good school and prove something to people who doubted you 15 years ago" life plan I had going, which is probably for the best, since that's about as far as the plan went.
posted by teponaztli at 2:59 AM on March 2, 2016 [15 favorites]

After waiting and worrying for 13 months, I finally a visa that will allow me to stay in the same country as my husband for at least the next 5 years. It was such a huge weight off my back that it took me a week or two to adjust to the idea.
posted by colfax at 3:18 AM on March 2, 2016 [17 favorites]

I am moving back to Italy in 10 days. I am not sure How i feel about that. It is best for my career but I am going to miss China.
posted by thegirlwiththehat at 4:44 AM on March 2, 2016 [7 favorites]

The job I started last year has me working 6-month postings for a while, and I started a new posting this week in a different part of government. Looks really interesting so far, and I am still so, so happy to have left academia for this. Hadn't realised how utterly, bizarrely awful my last job was getting until I could look back from a distance. And now I'm freeeeee!

Also I started cycling to work (a bit, sometimes), and it is just brilliant and I wish I'd done this years before.

Also also, I had a dentist appointment recently and everything was fine! My pregnancy two years ago messed up my teeth on a big scale - I needed ten fillings afterwards and months of appointments - so it was such a huge and blissful relief to have a dentist say "yep, all fine here!", I was walking on air for days.
posted by Catseye at 4:51 AM on March 2, 2016 [7 favorites]

I recently turned 45. I ran a half marathon at the weekend. I feel like things are going well at work and I'm finally in a position to influence some things that I care about. My wife is writing up her PhD and my older daughter is getting on well at her new school. Things are good at the moment and I try to appreciate it.

This thread reminds me a bit of the Gene Wolfe story, Westwind
posted by crocomancer at 5:13 AM on March 2, 2016 [6 favorites]

Hubs has been brought over to the dark side of American household appliances. We now have a brand new dryer to match the brand new washer. I haven't had a dryer in my 18 years of living in Italy - it's heady stuff, yo.

Our laundry technologies are sadly underappreciated in discussions of why the US was able to rise to global superpower status so quickly.
posted by Rock Steady at 5:20 AM on March 2, 2016 [10 favorites]

Mr. Freedom and I just bought a house, like, yesterday. I'm simultaneously excited and overwhelmed at how much needs to get done in the next 45 days.

And if you're going to post a Name This New Baby askme, I insist AGAINST considering the name "Wendell", even as a joke. I am living proof of the psychic damage that causes.

Our mortgage loan officer is named Wendell, although he spells it "Windell". He's a perfectly nice man and doesn't seem to have any psychic damage, although perhaps that's why he changed the spelling, to avoid it!

Also, my sister's boyfriend got a cat and named him Waffles. He likes to cuddle with a stuffed Stegosaurus named Stroganoff. The cuteness is beyond belief.
posted by chainsofreedom at 5:36 AM on March 2, 2016 [12 favorites]

I'm ticking over alright for now, barring the vague uneasy notion that I should be making more hay in this relative sunshine. Many of my friends are birthing or brewing babies, which never fails to amaze and delight me. Due for a big birthday in base 10 later this year for which I've not arranged anything fancy because procrastinating is a favourite hobby. Doing a poor job of the legwork involved in keeping up with people too. On the other hand I got roped (willingly) into a fun little multi-collaborative thing by a friend which is still going here in March, despite seriously ponging of New Year's Resolution. That's living alright.
posted by comealongpole at 5:42 AM on March 2, 2016 [5 favorites]

I just got back from a 2 week amazing ridiculous trip, and seeing my boyfriend and cat was utterly amazing. Sure I missed them while I was gone, and talked/texted with the bf almost daily, but man it was a sucker punch to walk in the door and just be "home". That was kind of cool. Also the bf took care of a whole bunch of crap I was sort of dreading and that makes things doubly nice to be home. Someone caring for you and just taking care of things unasked is just amazing, and I will never take that for granted. The kitty cat has continued his grand cat hair distribution scheme though, there is now cat hair in things I didn't know cat hair could get into.

On the downside, I'm still the only wage earner of the household and work, after 2 weeks of no-contact has been utter hell. I've showed up 30-45mins later than my usual start time every day this week, I just can't bring myself to care.
posted by larthegreat at 5:47 AM on March 2, 2016 [5 favorites]

I took up indoor rowing in November, and have discovered I have quite a knack for it. I now row five times a week and it is new my favorite form of exercise.
Yesterday, I got this song stuck in my head, which brought out of me this sort of warm, nostalgic glow. This nostalgia reached far back beyond the track's release (I've only just heard it in the past five years), into my college days back in the 90s. I missed my friends and friendships from that time, and thought about them fondly all day as that song played in my head.
I am heading back to Iceland in May, dragging my husband along this time. I hope he loves it as much as I do, so we can plan many more trips back there.
Our dog is old, and we are grappling over getting a new dog while she's alive or waiting until she goes. I need more slobbery furballs in my life.
I am growing in my conviction that Donald Trump read The Monkey Wrench Gang last year and decided that his personal Glen Canyon Dam is the American political system.
posted by msali at 5:53 AM on March 2, 2016 [4 favorites]

I'm making plans to finally (finally!) defend my dissertation next month.
I had a clear mammogram one year after my breast cancer diagnosis and treatment.
I hope I get a real job soon.
My kids are both turning out to be way smarter than me.
posted by pantarei70 at 6:25 AM on March 2, 2016 [18 favorites]

I discovered the other reason for typing with one hand when I had a baby a couple of weeks ago: breastfeeding.

The cats haven't tried to kill the kid yet - if you don't count last night's attempt of pushing a plastic box off a shelf and missing the kid by about a half a foot.

After 60 years of not working, and five months of work by some really excellent guys, a water feature was tested out in the gardens where I work and it was pretty glorious. It won't be up and running officially until this summer.
posted by sciencegeek at 6:26 AM on March 2, 2016 [13 favorites]

I am going to be 50 years old in 22 days.

It took me a while to reach this point but now I feel I can say that I'll revel it it, and work hard to be worthy of wearing purple.

There's more but I'm using tumblr to capture those explorations as this imminent event lands on me like a meteor.
posted by infini at 6:59 AM on March 2, 2016 [16 favorites]

I bought a new puppet. Meet Heady: Pic 1, Pic 2, and my boys got upgrades. Spank got new eyes, and Hoté finally got legs so he can walk! (You can't see Hoté's legs in that shot).
posted by cjorgensen at 7:58 AM on March 2, 2016 [9 favorites]

My life is in major upheaval at the moment. My husband left me just before Christmas, and we're currently deciding what to do with our house (which I love, and am currently living in). The valuation from the estate agent was much higher than expected, which is both good (more money!) and bad (I'm going to have to find somewhere else to go). I want to stay in the same village, but houses here are expensive (hence the valuation), and I'm currently debating whether or not I could fit myself, all my stuff, and my dog into a 1 bedroom house.

The answer to that is probably yes, but I also (mostly) work from home and I think treading the same circuit every day would get tiresome. I probably need at least another room as an alternate sitting place. Anyway. I started the new job (that's mostly from home) at the start of February and it's going well.

Still, even with that and with Rufus, I am lonely. I need to make more friends. It doesn't help that I'm in the UK but from the US, so none of my family's near. I think moving into a place that's just mine will help with the feeling that the ex could change his mind and come back through the door at any moment. He's not. He won't.

Gosh. Um, otherwise, I have been doing a lot of knitting?
posted by minsies at 9:16 AM on March 2, 2016 [22 favorites]

I just did a thing that's been on my to do list since late 2014. Go, me.

minisies, your baby Rufus has foof lips in that picture, and that's one of my favorite doggy attributes.
posted by phunniemee at 9:45 AM on March 2, 2016 [8 favorites]

He is great at foof lips!
posted by minsies at 9:52 AM on March 2, 2016 [7 favorites]

I made a possibly ill-advised decision to do a PhD in a subject that hardly anyone seems to care about but me and have been wondering whether, at last, I have bitten off more than I can chew. I am not without hopes, however. The current challenge is figuring out research trips to various libraries and archives in Germany and how to pay for them. The department has some funding available but not much. Today I was looking at housing possibilities for a week in Berlin and learned that conditions I would not have had any problems with at 19 are completely unacceptable at 38 (like sharing a room with 8 strangers!). All crossed fingers on my behalf are welcome!
posted by orrnyereg at 10:20 AM on March 2, 2016 [10 favorites]

This is a great chance for me to share my Super Bowl story (which is really a brag about my daughters disguised as a cute story)! We're not very into football but we turned on the TV for the halftime show because my wife likes Beyonce and the girls like Bruno Mars. We turned it on a few minutes early and the first half was still ending.

At one point the four-year-old looks up and says, "Football!"
I say, "That's right. Do you like football?"
"I don't know. Do any women play?"
"No, not really."
"Why not?"
"I don't know why. I don't think there's a good reason." [I didn't want to bring up the Women's Football League.]
"Then I don't like football."

A little while later the six-year-old was asking about who was playing, and I was explaining that it was the end of the season and this was the championships and the winner would get the big trophy for being the best team that year.
"Championships! They have that in soccer!" [The kids know I am a big soccer fan.]
"Yep, that's right."
"That's when the women play."
posted by nickmark at 10:28 AM on March 2, 2016 [11 favorites]

I made a possibly ill-advised decision to do a PhD in a subject that hardly anyone seems to care about but me

and me
posted by Michele in California at 10:48 AM on March 2, 2016 [3 favorites]

Thanks, Michele. You're super! *hug*
posted by orrnyereg at 10:56 AM on March 2, 2016 [2 favorites]

You know, I should have mentioned above that I'm pretty sure the whole reason that I was asked to be the celebrant was that the groom was present at the memorial service at which I spoke a couple of years ago, after help and support by the mefi community. I am just about positive that this is what lodged me in the groom's mind as someone who could speak from the heart in front of a crowd. So not only am I happy to share the information with the community, I also need to thank you all for your help over the course of years!
posted by janey47 at 11:05 AM on March 2, 2016 [5 favorites]

This thread is a great idea! well done.
*I am 2 yrs cancer free
*My 11 yr old son learned to love skiing this winter
*he and I are planning a trip to Sri Lanka this summer to see my host family from an AFS exhange. I had the chance to skype with them in december and it was the first time I had seen their faces in 34 years. so many emotions.
*i started coaching middle school ultimate. trying to foster a community based on fun, inclusiveness, gender equity, and spirit of the game.
*life is pretty good
posted by OHenryPacey at 11:10 AM on March 2, 2016 [26 favorites]

[I didn't want to bring up the Women's Football League.]

May I recommend introducing her to the Western Women's Canadian Football League? This year the Regina Riot upset the three-peat champions, the Saskatoon Valkyries, for the national title.
posted by KathrynT at 11:34 AM on March 2, 2016 [2 favorites]

I submitted my PhD thesis to the university's examinations office last week.

Me too! High five.

My next step may or may not be more difficult: figuring out how to avoid becoming a hobo.
posted by randomnity at 12:42 PM on March 2, 2016 [8 favorites]

My dude and I have been going indoor rock climbing since November and we have managed to keep up a habit of going 2-3 times a week and it is the most fun and satisfaction I have ever derived from a physical activity!

I am seeing Hamilton in NY in two weeks with my sister and one of my best friends who is coming to meet us from Philly! I have had tickets since October and it has been a long six-month wait and I am so fucking excited and we are staying in New Jersey and going to visit Weehawken and stuff!

I am going to a work conference in NOLA in May and I get to meet ColdChef and komara and a bunch of people I have known for years but never actually met in person!

I am getting married in June to the wonderful LoRichTimes and then we're moving across the country in July and then I go back to school for Computer Science in September (mostly for Canadian-getting-a-TN-in-the-US reasons but also I am really excited to learn algorithms and software infrastructure and stuff)!

IOW I am exhausted and stressed and anxious because everything is happening at once but also omg everything is happening at once and my life is kind of ridiculously great right now and it makes me feel a little bit guilty about how anxious and stressed I am. Also: I love all of you.
posted by Phire at 12:58 PM on March 2, 2016 [21 favorites]

There are some people in this thread having some genuinely hard times. I want to acknowledge that, among all the celebrations. Hugs if you want them.
posted by wintersweet at 12:58 PM on March 2, 2016 [54 favorites]

Thank you wintersweet... I was thinking the same and I'm glad you made us pause to remember it out loud.
posted by infini at 1:16 PM on March 2, 2016 [5 favorites]

I am seeing Hamilton in NY in two weeks... and we are staying in New Jersey and going to visit Weehawken and stuff!

Be careful. Everything is legal in New Jersey.
posted by MCMikeNamara at 1:26 PM on March 2, 2016 [6 favorites]

I am seeing Hamilton in NY in two weeks

*Entire thread burned down by the fury of the green-eyed monster of envy*
posted by duffell at 1:34 PM on March 2, 2016 [8 favorites]

I agree with Wintersweet; thank you so much for acknowledging the tough stuff. This thread is awesome because there is so much to celebrate, but there is also so much shit going on in the lives of so many, and we should definitely be acknowledging that; as well and offering comfort and assistance. Over on metachat, we offer hugs nearly as much as we offer celebratory whoops of joy.
Hugs to everyone who could use one.
posted by msali at 1:42 PM on March 2, 2016 [6 favorites]

Update to this., in a similar thread:
3 years 9 months 17 days
posted by BozoBurgerBonanza at 1:55 PM on March 2, 2016 [25 favorites]

Been thinking about posting a long-delayed AskMeFi, but gonna post it here first since it is a current life update. MeFites are always so good at helping people figure out their life trajectories.

I've been feeling sorta down and frustrated - my friends are all finally, slowly graduating from college (I always had a younger friend group) and moving to distant, accomplished places. I'm three months out from finally graduating my extremely difficult Tier 1 university, with a low GPA, but with my health and dignity restored and in-tact after taking time off to recover from the burnout and trauma. I'm wondering what to do next, since all of my experience is in community organizing at my university and at a non-profit, but I'm not sure if I could stamina-wise continue to do community organizing for a job, especially because I'm still in the process of getting my driver's license. I've been thinking about switching into web development and content writing work, but it's a huge slog up because I have to self-teach everything, and I'm feeling currently very scared and disappointed at myself, but this stuff is exciting. At the same time, I don't want to lose my skills in my social justice and analytical research. bleeech.

but life is wonderful otherwise. I just want to build stamina after recovering from so much trauma, and build a professional career that I can be proud of.
posted by yueliang at 2:23 PM on March 2, 2016 [10 favorites]

Been enjoying the mass-murder threads!
posted by telstar at 2:36 PM on March 2, 2016

You guys. I went to the dentist. It had been ages, an embarrassing number of double digit years. I broke a tooth at Christmas, and getting a crown (and some old Ask threads) finally gave me courage to go for a checkup... And I don't have any cavities! Insert PSA for daily flossing here. I was worried and scared, but not anymore.

Sending good thoughts and hugs to anyone who wants them.
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 2:57 PM on March 2, 2016 [12 favorites]

I had a kidney stone a few weeks ago. I cross-examined a couple witnesses, didn't have any more witnesses for the day, and was watching the direct examination of a witness a colleague was going to cross when I suddenly had to bolt from the hearing room. I'm not a fan of going to the ER or being in lots of pain, and it was worse having to do those things while out of town on business. But, I'm fine now, though the CT scan did turn up some odd, but so far seemingly harmless, aspects of my anatomy. They are going to do some kind of scan of my heart in a couple weeks to make sure it isn't oddly shaped like so many other parts of my insides, and I'm trying not to think about that too much.

We are in the busy time of the year with my wife attending church twice a week due to Lent and my son having cross country ski league three evenings a week, and that on top of all our normal activities and responsibilities. I love winter (and bitterly regret this mild one), but I'll be happy when it is April and we can relax a bit.

I haven't collected much sap from my backyard sugar maple yet, but the next few days should be good.
posted by Area Man at 2:58 PM on March 2, 2016 [5 favorites]

orrnyereg, good for you. I recently also made the decision to study something niche and it means that I am excited every day. :-)
posted by chainsofreedom at 3:14 PM on March 2, 2016 [2 favorites]

I was going to make a Metatalk post, but really this is a better place for it (maybe...it's kind of a derail): I've been a member of Metafilter for 15 years today. I have not been a very active poster, but I have read Metafilter nearly every day. I remember reading Metafilter while holding a sleeping baby in one arm and now I can talk to that former baby about what I've read on Metafilter. I have found that I am not alone in my weird interests and opinions, and you've introduced me to a wealth of amazing stuff, and provided such amazing commentary. Thank you all for being here. It really is the best of the web.
posted by gamera at 3:27 PM on March 2, 2016 [40 favorites]

I'm having twin girls any day now, and I'm terrified.
posted by studioaudience at 3:29 PM on March 2, 2016 [30 favorites]

Courage, dear hearts.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 3:52 PM on March 2, 2016 [18 favorites]

I've been thinking about switching into web development and content writing work, but it's a huge slog up because I have to self-teach everything, and I'm feeling currently very scared and disappointed at myself, but this stuff is exciting.

I haven't done it, but I have something I want to write that I haven't seen other people write which seems necessary and I've been considering sending it to The Toast. The Mary Sue and Cracked also take submissions, but I'm not sure if they are paying or not; all of them are pretty activism-tolerant in my opinion. If you want help setting up a pretty basic blog, I've been blogging for a few years and my memail is open. There are also some writing podcasts I like - I Should Be Writing, Ditch Diggers, and Writing Excuses and all of them address different aspects of writing from professional authors.

Jedi hugs and much love to everyone else.
posted by Deoridhe at 4:19 PM on March 2, 2016 [6 favorites]

i made the mistake of reactivating okcupid and tinder today and was instantly reminded of how exhausting and terrible dating is and how i'll probably be a single cat mom forever. on the bright side, my 28th birthday is on friday and i'll get to be surrounded by my wonderful friends and then come home to my stupid chubby loving cat. i'm prepping to apply to grad schools and finally get my MLIS, so i hope 28 can be a year of me learning to not be so hard on myself and how to deal with school stress better.
posted by burgerrr at 4:27 PM on March 2, 2016 [8 favorites]

I just moved to Oakland two days ago. I'm excited about it! I start my new job in a few days. I don't know what to expect yet, but I got good vibes from everyone during the interview.

I just released a cassette on one record label, and soon I'll be releasing a vinyl record on another label. So that's two different full-lengths in two different formats, within two months of each other. Weird! But why not!

I just joined MixCloud and I'm going to learn Traktor so I can make a monthly mix.

My favorite song of the moment is Sound of Ceres - "Dagger Only Run". A mefite is in that band, but I don't know if he wants to be identified so I won't name him. Their album is available for preview streaming now on Stereogum.
posted by naju at 4:47 PM on March 2, 2016 [9 favorites]

Ooh, ooh, I finally have something to add! I just beat Dante's Inferno, go me! (Yes, it is a five year old game. I have an infinitesimal video game budget, fight me! Or not, you know live and let live and all) Also, I am struggling in my graduate program this semester. I have zero motivation this time of year. Congratulations and condolences to everyone as appropriate. Hugs all around.
posted by Gyre,Gimble,Wabe, Esq. at 5:54 PM on March 2, 2016 [3 favorites]

Yes, it is a five year old game.

I can do you one better - I just finished the main quest in Morrowind for the first time! I miss the cliff racers already
posted by DingoMutt at 6:12 PM on March 2, 2016 [3 favorites]

Totally open to suggestions for games that are like Dante's Inferno - monsters, creepiness, etc.
posted by Gyre,Gimble,Wabe, Esq. at 6:43 PM on March 2, 2016

Have you heard the good news about Dark Souls
posted by prize bull octorok at 6:44 PM on March 2, 2016 [3 favorites]

The news I heard about Dark Souls is that it is infernally difficult.... and given my lack of general motivation..... can I muster the determination to grind through levels?
posted by Gyre,Gimble,Wabe, Esq. at 6:46 PM on March 2, 2016

IMHO yes. Look up some of the old MeFi posts about it!
posted by prize bull octorok at 6:50 PM on March 2, 2016 [2 favorites]

Thanks, Friend! (Or potential super-villain...)
posted by Gyre,Gimble,Wabe, Esq. at 6:57 PM on March 2, 2016 [1 favorite]

Dark Souls is so brilliant it will ruin you for everything else out there. Take the plunge!
posted by naju at 6:59 PM on March 2, 2016 [2 favorites]

When summing up my life from 2008 to now, I generally tell people it took me longer to find a real, permanent job than it did for the Allies to defeat Hitler. But now I've been there about two years, I actually like it, and tomorrow Mr. CEO is taking me out to lunch.
posted by scratch at 7:33 PM on March 2, 2016 [14 favorites]

Life update: As I was scrolling through this thread just now, my orange tabby, Riker, jumped up on the bed and immediately curled up on my chest and started purring loudly, so I kissed him on his little head.
posted by duffell at 7:58 PM on March 2, 2016 [18 favorites]

I just turned forty. The record store where I've been moonlighting for the last thirteen years just sold to a new owner and I'm pretty much out of there. I'm trying to learn to be better at change, but it's a process. In other news, the writing is going well and my cat is adorable. So mostly good over here.
posted by thivaia at 8:03 PM on March 2, 2016 [7 favorites]

It's been a crazy 18 months. Since October 2014 I have:

Gotten a new job.
Moved to a new city.
Mother died.
Sold a house.
Lost that new job.

I miss Mom, but life has been good. Luckily we're OK financially for now, I've had the time to begin selling a ton of stuff on eBay that is built up over the years. And without job, I've been able to spend a lot of time with my relatively new wife and help her out with a lot of things I would not have been able to normally.

Good luck and dog bless everyone.
posted by marxchivist at 8:34 PM on March 2, 2016 [10 favorites]

As one of those people who left a "my life sucks at the moment" comment, I just wanted to say that I am happy to hear so much celebratory news. Rock on mefites. As Walgreen's used to say to my great irritation, " be well and prosper".

Seriously, I am always happy to hear good news from you folks.
posted by futz at 9:13 PM on March 2, 2016 [9 favorites]

You guys. I went to the dentist. It had been ages, an embarrassing number of double digit years.

I went to the dentist too! After almost a decade of panicked denial, I embarked on a year-long project of seriously taking care of my teeth. And four cleanings, one root planing, one sonicare purchase, ~400 flossing sessions, and a quadruple wisdom-tooth extraction surgery later, I officially don't have gum disease anymore*. MODERN DENTISTRY, it is apparently a thing!

Apart from that I am entirely at sea, but either I'm coping with it well, or all of my emotions died, because mostly everything feels fine.

*except during my period, when my entire body apparently just quits, including my gums.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 9:57 PM on March 2, 2016 [7 favorites]

scratch: it took me longer to find a real, permanent job than it did for the Allies to defeat Hitler.

Yeah but they had help and you were on your own.
posted by Too-Ticky at 2:39 AM on March 3, 2016 [16 favorites]

Husband and I are planning a trip to the US to see my folks next month – for the first time in a loooong time, basically because of procrastinating on bureaucratic stuff, and I wasn't sure they'd let me back into Greece coming back home. (I still irrationally feel like maybe they won't!) So, I'm having a lot of silly (surely silly?) anxiety about it all. The last time we went, my husband's back went out after lifting some heavy stuff, and he was in terrible pain and had to use a wheelchair in airports on the trip home, and I had my first, and so far only, actual, literal, terrifying anxiety attack (did you know it pretty much feels exactly like you are going to die? The things you learn!) Yay!

It all just cemented my growing feeling that leaving the house at all is perhaps something best left to the experts.

But on the good news side, a cool friend will be staying in our house to take care of our dog, water our plants, etc., so that's a really, really big relief. She will still be incredibly freaked out, but not as much as if we left her somewhere strange. (dog, not friend.)
posted by taz (staff) at 4:51 AM on March 3, 2016 [11 favorites]

I received 319 (and counting) likes for a comment I made on metafilter, thus completely shattering my previous record of 61.

Why does this make me happy?
posted by crazylegs at 5:56 AM on March 3, 2016 [11 favorites]

I actually just started Dark Souls recently, and I don't get a ton of time to play, so I'm not feeling guilty at all about getting help wherever I can. Initially it was just like... okay, Steam Sale, even if I don't like it much it's worth $5 for the experience. But it turns out that... a lot of games, I haven't felt really satisfied until I finished them, or at least got near the end. This one, not that I'm stopping, but I already feel like it was worth playing just for finishing what is basically the tutorial.

I just found out that some of the stuff I thought I had under control for the deadline on the 15th... isn't. Yay. So now I'm probably not going to get a day off this weekend. Again. I haven't had a day off since Valentine's Day. Ugh.
posted by Sequence at 6:43 AM on March 3, 2016 [2 favorites]

Bought an apartment in Seoul, visited Berlin, Spain, France, and Taiwan for the first time, got a new trumpet, won an Oscar.

Okay, just that last one's true.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 6:45 AM on March 3, 2016 [7 favorites]

Crazylegs, congratulations, you should be proud. The withering comment is a delicate art.
posted by GuyZero at 8:00 AM on March 3, 2016 [1 favorite]

I forgot to mention I'm involved in a kickstarter for the games site Offworld (I'm one of the writers), and it just hit its final stretch goal of $60,000! With only 24 hours left. So happy.
posted by naju at 8:54 AM on March 3, 2016 [4 favorites]

Just wanted to echo what futz said - as a bad news bear-er, I am so happy to read the good stuff that's going on. Yay, you! And you too! Also you!
posted by minsies at 9:08 AM on March 3, 2016 [1 favorite]

I just celebrated 4 years at the Greatest Company Ever and am looking forward to my annual trip to Hawaii in May.

I'm also reading the Tiffany Aching books to my son during bedtime and we're within 40 pages of the end of Wintersmith and I'm loving every moment and also dreading the eventual end of the series.

I hit 17,000 steps yesterday and have lost 10 pounds since the first of the year. I feel like I *finally* am on the path to a healthier life.
posted by Twicketface at 10:10 AM on March 3, 2016 [6 favorites]

So, had scalp lump removed, turned 40, got first kidney stone with a massive infection so I had my first hospital stay, broke 4+ years of low carb living, long-suffering and amazing mom's job contract was terminated. But I'm looking forward to meeting up with some awesome vintage sewing machine people in a couple weeks, and a 2Cellos concert in April (found out about them here).

Now we're figuring things out, again, and will probably be making some major changes. Metafilter and the people are a source of comfort and entertainment, even though I mostly watch. I might even ask a question soon! Hugs for everyone who wants them!

I'm really glad I kept my nice rice cooker.
posted by monopas at 10:53 AM on March 3, 2016 [3 favorites]

Oh! And I taught myself to crochet!
posted by monopas at 10:55 AM on March 3, 2016 [5 favorites]

My 6 year old niece informed me this evening that I'm the best Auntie in the world which is frankly the greatest achievement of my life.
posted by billiebee at 11:22 AM on March 3, 2016 [19 favorites]

I just turned 29! I'm really hoping to find a good karaoke bar in Oakland this weekend. I realized recently after digging through my hard drive that in spite of spending the winter in a listless anhedonic haze I've got a whole lot of good half-songs sitting around, even if I didn't realize it at the time.

My dog, on the other hand, is happy about precisely none of this, since she recently got TPLO surgery. I feel like in a fair universe you'd get three vouchers a year to get a verbal message across to your pets (since for the most part being forced to communicate nonverbally is actually what's great about pets), so you could occasionally tell them things like "this is for your own good I promise" to keep them from thinking that you're just drugging them and imprisoning them and making them wear dumb hats for your own enjoyment.
posted by invitapriore at 11:45 AM on March 3, 2016 [6 favorites]

My office was moved to a new location, which has tripled my commute time, but now I share space with really great coworkers. I was appointed to a local commission, which required political strategery and made the news, and now I get to rule on noise complaints and I get a shiny badge (which I promise to flash at the next meetup.) I met with my tattoo artist last week to sketch out plans for the rest of my tattoo sleeve of California native plants and animals and I have a bunch of appointments with her through the end of the summer. I scored Hamilton tickets for rtha and me for later this year (non stop!). I'm looking forward to camping trips planned for the summer (some with mefites.)

Also, hot flashes are a thing. A disruptive, annoying, obnoxious thing.
posted by gingerbeer at 12:02 PM on March 3, 2016 [4 favorites]


Bad: Dad (77) starting week 2 of chemo for non-hodgkin's lymphoma
Good: They live right beside an awesome Cancer facility; everyone has been really great and optimistic about the outcome. He's exhausted but doing ok so far and luckily I'm around to drive him and mom to all the appointments and stuff.
Bad: He started losing his hair in big patches this week.
Good: He's had the same dorky comb-over since the 70's so we're all hoping this is a new beginning.

Bad: Oldest daughter in 1st year university 6 hours away. She's had a really tough year with anxiety/depression stuff; I miss her like crazy and worry about her constantly.
Good: She's had a really great last couple of weeks and seems happy and optimistic about summer plans and health stuff in general so things are looking positive.

Good: It almost killed me at the end but I finished the RPM Challenge to write and recorded an album in the month of February. It's called Lemonade.
Bad: It's a bit sloppy and off the cuff, there are a million mistakes and things I'd fix if I had the time.
Good: I let myself be sloppy and vulnerable and creative and not second-guess; got off my ass and made something after being in a long rut. So net positive I guess.

Bad: We had a shit year with expensive things breaking, needing to be fixed or replaced JUST after the warranty expired.
--1. New couch that we agonized over choosing just over a year ago was leaking a insane amount of feathers, like it looked like there was a chicken fight on it every day no matter how many times I plucked it, and they'd poke you when you sat down. Like needles.
--2. Mid-range espresso machine that was a splurge item for us died.
--3. Car radio went dead 2 months after 4 year warranty (it's a VW diesel so that's a whole other issue...)
Good: A long series of email complaint letters that were always positive and never snarky resulted in
--1: credit to the couch store in the amount we paid for ours. We picked a new one and crazily enough they just called while I was writing this to tell me delivery day is April 19th. Sometime between 4 and 9pm.
--2: Free repair of the espresso machine with warranty extended 1 year. We had to drop it off in and pick it up in Milton (an hour outside of Toronto) but we had a nice drive and had fish'n'chips at a greasy dive from the 50's and I got a cool plaid jacket at the Salvation army for $12.
--3: VW paid for 50% of a new radio, the other 50% we paid with some of the "goodwill" money they've given us for the diesel fiasco.
All three things were resolved last week and we were like "woo hoo customer service week!!!"
posted by chococat at 12:21 PM on March 3, 2016 [12 favorites]

I'm completely overworked in a career that I don't have a genuine passion for but am currently stuck in because it's just lucrative enough and has benefits. My partner got a colposcopy yesterday and we're awaiting the results because she already had high levels of pre-cancerous cells last time and it looks like it's coming back. I had my second radial ablation last month and it looks like my heart condition (PSVT) may actually be 100% cured this time. My mother is reaching out again as she spirals into crippling depression from mental health issues and the added weight of being diagnosed with diabetes. We've been house shopping for 7 months now (well really she has) but the third offer we made just fell through again. I've made it back to the gym twice last week for the first time in a year now that the heart is good and I'm working on dropping 20 pounds. My partner and I have been discussing marriage for a month or two now and actual plans are starting to form. I'm feeling somewhat depressed and in a constant state of stress but I'm reading lots of great books which helps and spending a good chunk of time with my best friend which is also great.

All in all it's a balance and I'm tired.
posted by lazaruslong at 12:24 PM on March 3, 2016 [6 favorites]

Good: I let myself be sloppy and vulnerable and creative and not second-guess; got off my ass and made something after being in a long rut. So net positive I guess.

This is huge! I have to relearn at least once every three months that the path from sloppiness to refinement involves doing more things and getting a little less sloppy each time rather than thinking super hard about one thing and trying to make it perfect, so I think this is absolutely worth celebrating.
posted by invitapriore at 12:31 PM on March 3, 2016 [5 favorites]

Since asking this question, I've continued looking, and today I started my first job in the tech industry, at a big data services company! It's only a lowly internship for now, but it's a million percent better than last year, when I had to change country at short notice and decided to change career while I was at it. Thank you so much to the answerers.

My son started nursery in this country last week, and is rocking it.

The next big challenge is getting my wife a permanent visa, finding a decent place to live, and passing my driving test at the end of the month. And then adjusting to some long-overdue stability.
posted by Wrinkled Stumpskin at 1:54 PM on March 3, 2016 [1 favorite]

All the bulbs I planted last fall in my yard have sprouted and some have even bloomed! Tomorrow, I'm booking flights for a trip to Seattle over Easter, so I can see my friends and family who have all moved there in the past few months. My dog is very happy and adorable and still sporting her winter coat, which has appeared mainly on her chest and hind legs for some reason. I made a ton of chocolate chip cookie dough and can't decide whether it's better raw or baked. And I finished crocheting a potholder while reading this threat.

Also, I don't seem to be allergic to my new antidepressants, which is a big deal and pretty awesome.
posted by mollywas at 2:04 PM on March 3, 2016 [3 favorites]

I'm getting tested to see if I'm diabetic or not in 3 weeks, and I'm anxious about it. But I am back on track with going to doctor's appointments, and I spoke up about a referral specialist who had put me off very much, (which was a big part of why I was avoiding the doc) and I was listened to about it, and that was very heartening. I had an eye appointment and everything's swell there.

My Big Deal is that I'm illustrating a book for a writer I respect, and a publisher in my favorite genre who I've been aware of since they launched when I was a teenager. It's out of my usual work style but very much in my personal favorite genre, and best yet, it's good. And they like my work very much. Usually the appreciation goes the other way, so it's lovely and - not to jinx it - it's flowing easy and fun. I'll speak up about it on Projects later when there's more to show.
posted by Lou Stuells at 2:34 PM on March 3, 2016 [4 favorites]

Mom passed a few days after my 32nd birthday. Dad had a stroke across the state 6 weeks later. My Buttnugget and I had horrible fights for a few months due to insane stressors. Went through The Changing of the Meds. So stressed out my GP was like YA GOTTA TAKE A VACATION. With what money, I wonder?

Buttnugget and I have made up and are doing as okay as we ever have and will be at 6 years in June, which is the longest anyone has ever put up with me. Mom's passing left me with a Boston puppy, who is pretty much the love of my life even though he seems to like expressing his anal glands on my couch as often as he is able to. Work is fine; got lots of educational plans and opportunities coming down the pipes, even back to NFA in the fall. Possibly applying for a sweet federal position, but that's all up in the air. Working on my golf game. Ready for it to be warm again because it would be nice to start fishing again.

That's about it down here.
posted by sara is disenchanted at 3:35 PM on March 3, 2016 [6 favorites]

I adopted a new kitten last month. At six months old, she's barely 3.5 pounds and makes our ten-pound tomcat look like a hulking beast. Her name's Janet and she's a tiny ball of hate and velociraptor purrs and I love her. Here she is dressed up like a stegosaur in a futile attempt to prevent her licking her spay stitches.

I also shaved my head last week, more or less because I saw Deadpool and desperately wished I'd been a teenager like Negasonic, and because I'm a grown-ass adult in a job where no one will care and so I could. As a bonus, it has triggered many people to offer me head scritches and inspired a lot more bold lipstick wearing.

We're also attempting to buy a house this week, after a very generous tax refund and a gift from my parents over the winter left us with enough money to make a down payment. I am alternately excited and terrified, because doing so will wipe out all our savings and I am irrationally convinced that something will immediately happen to destroy it. If I'm vague and out of it lately, it's because I've spent this entire week being gripped by an irrational state of terror.
posted by sciatrix at 4:33 PM on March 3, 2016 [19 favorites]

People to head scritch are the BEST.

I have to see Deadpool at least one more time in the theater. Maybe two. Or three. A couple times in a row, perhaps?
posted by Deoridhe at 4:38 PM on March 3, 2016 [1 favorite]

I also shaved my head last week, more or less because I saw Deadpool and desperately wished I'd been a teenager like Negasonic....

Your head looks awesome!
posted by Gyre,Gimble,Wabe, Esq. at 4:38 PM on March 3, 2016 [6 favorites]

The score in our yard is currently Vallhunds 2, Small Mammals 0.

With any luck biscotti and I will have a litter of puppies (actual canine puppies, not cutesy-isms for hoo-man infants) this summer. Well, Zhora will have them, and biscotti will manage the food-ape side of the whole process, and I will do minor smart-like-tractor things and pat them. If there's somewhere appropriate here to do so I'll throw a link to the inevitable webcam up when the time comes.

I don't think I've ever mentioned this, but my partner has wanted a Vallhund for years and google stalked all the breeders they liked best and waved the pictures at me a lot. You guys are their favorite, so I'd seen your kennel website pretty frequently off and on.

And then one day you posted about Nina and I clicked the photo link and recognized her and my partner noticed and basically lost their shit with excitement because you know one of Nina's humans, OMG!!!! So, uh, I can only imagine the excitement if you guys were to post a webcam of the litter somewhere where my partner could watch.

Metafilter: it's a really small world.
posted by sciatrix at 4:54 PM on March 3, 2016 [10 favorites]

Awwwwwwww! Nina is a once-in-several-lifetimes dog for sure.

There will for sure be a webcam -- we needs one so that we can monitor them if we're away. I'll be sure to memail you if there's no appropriate way to post it here.

Odds are you're nowhere near us, but if your partner is thinking about actually pulling the trigger they (or you) should totally memail/email biscotti to talk about Vallhunds (the shedding and barking and OMFG the licking) and who you might talk to in your region.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 6:08 PM on March 3, 2016 [2 favorites]

Got laid off from 12 years at Halliburton in January 2015.
Started a job working from home for a company in California in late February 2015.
Laid off from that job, along with a few other folks, when they hit hard times in September 2015.

Started a new job with a company here in Houston at the beginning of November 2015.
Had my "90 day" review with my boss at the current gig yesterday.
They like me. I really like them. I can see myself being here for a while.

The bills are paid, I enjoy going to work every day, and the AC in my car works.
Can't really ask for more than that.
posted by mrbill at 6:14 PM on March 3, 2016 [16 favorites]

Ha! Suuuuuper tempting, but for financial reasons having to do with the house the timing is really terrible right now, and Tay kept making huge eyes and saying "NO I CANNOT EVEN ENTERTAIN THE NOTION THE TIMING IS TOO BAD" when I asked. So maybe we'll drop you an email and ask for references in a year or two, when our finances have recovered from this house.

We are well prepared for licking, though--my god, our current dog licks more fervently than any dog I have ever known, and I grew up with Jack Russell Terriers!
posted by sciatrix at 6:34 PM on March 3, 2016 [1 favorite]

Yeah, new pups can be a serious blow to the bank account. Send email to biscotti whenever y'all are ready to think about thinking about pulling the trigger. Or me, but she knows other breeders way better than I do.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:42 PM on March 3, 2016 [2 favorites]

I am currently taking a business fundamentals class online hosted by Harvard Business School and already I have a reputation for being a really quick rabble-rouser (mostly because I'm unemployed and thus have all the time in the world to study). Last night I yelled at my screen because their take on minimum wage was based on a model of market equilibrium that doesn't actually exist in the real world (because employees are severely underpaid).
posted by divabat at 9:41 PM on March 3, 2016 [2 favorites]

After a rough couple of years, some of which was very rough indeed, things seem to be looking up for me finally. 2015 capped off an almost completely shitty year by having my two youngest daughters kicked out by their mother and coming to live with me full-time (which is overall good, but shitty for them at the time) but also included the first of my eldest daughter's two weddings.

I seem to have finally arrived at a job in my organisation that not only suits me, but that I seem to be pretty good at and pays well. Now I'm waiting anxiously to see if I get appointed to it permanently (which includes requiring me to get my citizenship finalised because it requires a security clearance).

My eldest daughter is happily working at the same place as me, middle daughter has started at university and, after a slightly nervous start, is enjoying learning about journalism and settling into the university lifestyle, youngest daughter is much happier in her new, calmer, home environment and her depression has faded into the background a bit and my son is, well, the same as always - happy and unconcerned by anything going on around him.

For the first time in many years, I have disposable income. My kids are happy and thriving. I'm alone and sometimes lonely but, overall, life is OK and that's about all I expect. There, you're all caught up.
posted by dg at 2:30 AM on March 4, 2016 [15 favorites]

My 6 year old can ski any run on the mountain, including the ones I've admonished him to stay away from. It's amazing to expose your child to something that they apply themselves to, have a talent for, and then push their limits to see what they can do. I adore this child and he can keep up with his old man, and in fact will be pushing me in a couple years.

Spent most of last year setting up a treatment program for people with hepatitis c and cirrhosis which is finally up and running and so far have a dozen people on their way to full recovery.

Also, I am fulfilling a lifelong dream by visiting London in April. Wondering if I should call for a Meetup?
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 2:53 AM on March 4, 2016 [6 favorites]

Slarty, I have called meet ups every time I have travelled anywhere since 2009, and I heartily endorse it. I hit up the London folk in 2012 and can specifically give London a thumbs up as well (note that this same thumbs up applies to New Orleans, Rome, and Paris).
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 3:35 AM on March 4, 2016 [4 favorites]

I just made a negroni with Hammer & Tongs' L'Afrique vermouth. AND IT'S SUPER FUCKEN GOOD.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 4:18 AM on March 4, 2016 [3 favorites]

Wondering if I should call for a Meetup?

The first time I went to London, I called a few meetups and all were delightful. This time around when I went to London I got taken out to dinner by people who had met at the first meetup and were now getting married. Call that meetup.
posted by jessamyn (retired) at 7:31 AM on March 4, 2016 [5 favorites]

Jessamyn wins, I just got to try Turkish food. (I also found the exact Hotblack Desiato sign that gave Douglas Adams the idea for the name, though, across the street from the restaurant.)
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 8:07 AM on March 4, 2016 [1 favorite]

I had to Emergency Stop a 275 hp, 15,000 rpm compressor because the gearbox was smoking.

Eventually I drove it down to the manufacturer where they discovered the catastrophic bearing failure, which they covered under warranty since they'd put the wrong bearings in.
posted by Confess, Fletch at 8:47 PM on March 4, 2016 [3 favorites]

Also I'm heading off to Australia in May, potentially for good. It's weird, because I don't have a lot of agency in this, I'm just going along for the ride. I have a big project this year to get out of Malaysia and into a better sustainable situation, but this specific move was mostly prompted by my parents freaking out about their mortality/my mental health/me being bored and by the current bizarro-world political climate here.

I need to find a job if I'm going to stay there, and having a local mobile # plus my current PR would help a lot. But I'm still anxious about facing the same failures I did for years (which led me to being in the US for a while and then back to Malaysia once my US visa ran out). So if you know of any Australian jobs that could use someone like me, please let me know!
posted by divabat at 8:57 PM on March 4, 2016 [6 favorites]

I fell in love hard last year with someone I'd been friends with for years. Love was mutual, magical and delightful until he very suddenly and very harshly dumped me via text message back in January (we're both 49, by the way). He has been no-contact and I thought I was going to die for a while there. I learned that heartbreak at almost 50 is so much harder than heartbreak in my 20s, 30s and 40s. I'm just now starting to feel better and I only think of him 10-15 times a day now, which is a big improvement. Reading AskMes about love/loss/heartbreak helped immensely, so thank you for sharing your stories and advice.

My son (and only child) is graduating high school this June and has received 2 college acceptances so far. 3 more to go. I'm so very proud of him. He was a finalist this week at our Boys and Girls Club "Youth of the Year" awards. All of the kids had to give a speech about how the Club has helped them grow. The majority of the speeches involved tears. I stand in awe of all of them.

I went to the doctor for my first physical in 6 years. Given my lifestyle choices over the past 30 years, I assumed that there would be bad news in some form. Every test came back with good results. I'm shocked that I could treat my body so badly and not do permanent damage. I feel like I have a new lease on life now, and am trying to correct bad behaviors by taking better care of myself. An added bonus will be that I'll look and feel awesome the next time I run into that dick that dumped me.

Now that my son will no longer be in high school, I will no longer be tied to his school district, which means I can move out of NY and back to CT where my job/friends/family/life is.

On review: Looks like my theme this year is Fresh Start.
posted by sundrop at 9:46 AM on March 5, 2016 [11 favorites]

Last week I helped my client (who has a disability) apply for and get a job. She starts next week and will now hopefully be able to continue living independently. I think I'm happier than she is!
posted by Aha moment at 11:28 AM on March 5, 2016 [10 favorites]

The second half of last year had me doing some study which I A. liked the subject of, B: had importance to some career ideas, C: would actually be graded. I still could not find the motivation to do it; my eyes would just slip off, and trying to get it neat was like pulling teeth. I failed this subject.

This seemed wrong in terms of motivation; even if it was tedious to write out it ticked all the other boxes. I went to the doctor and said basically autism spectrum (which I have been diagnosed with) is almost a ddx for ADD (which I have not had any diagnosis for), could I see if something for the latter helps at all?

It may not be the perfect diagnosis but I am no longer printing out three copies of everything because I lose the first two so things look promising.
posted by solarion at 8:04 PM on March 5, 2016 [2 favorites]

I decided about 2 weeks ago that I wasn't being treated properly at my old job, so at about 9 in the morning on a Thursday I up and quit it, displaying no pique whatsoever. I sought another the next day, which took all of 8 minutes. I am happier.
posted by scottymac at 8:13 PM on March 5, 2016 [5 favorites]

Followed a lead/thread here and made January dry, no reason; just made the month dry. Had a dozen beers in Feb; March is shaping up to be dry also. OK; heading to altitude and taking alcohol; but yeah, good and thanks again mefi.

Saved me couple of hundred dollars, and a whole lot of more or less wasted time drinking.
posted by buzzman at 8:41 PM on March 5, 2016 [1 favorite]

Also because we are at the bottom of the thread and nobody will look at this I acknowledged I have problems with alcohol, looked into AA, looked into the literature, rejected AA because the success rate is apparently abysmal, and wiil ask my doctor about naltrexone in a couple of days.

And let's face it, I don't want to quit. I don't get that painkilling elsewhere. But I'm just trying to remind myself of what the AskMe chorus would be if I detailed the situation, because I know exactly what it would say.
posted by solarion at 6:23 AM on March 6, 2016 [21 favorites]

I'm single.
Like moved-on, new start, single-in-my-head single.

Still deciding whether this goes in the good or bad pile.
posted by fullerine at 6:48 AM on March 6, 2016 [1 favorite]

I bought a condo and am living totally on my own, which is a big win! It's actually really great and I'm delighted about it.

I adopted two kittens a few weeks ago and had a big panic attack and mental/emotion breakdown and had to return them to the rescue organization a week after adopting them. I feel horribly guilty about not being able to handle them, but it was absolutely the right decision for my mental state, and consequently for their welfare, even though I will probably always feel like a heel.

I am halfway through completing my MLIS degree, which is good, because I feel like I have a direction for where I want my career/life to be. My "in the meantime" job that I'm working until I finish my degree is pretty alright, too - definitely the best job I've had to date.

I re-joined okcupid last week and am despairing - I don't know how to meet people in the real world, but I am deeply disheartened by the okc interactions thus far.

I've had some ups and downs recently, but on the whole am doing pretty well.

Hugs and love to all, congrats and condolences, as needed.
posted by firei at 8:17 AM on March 6, 2016 [2 favorites]

I've been saving my pennies and making covert plans and it all comes to pass next week. Next week while my husband is on vacation I am moving out and finally getting free of a 20 year long abusive marriage. I'm terrified and excited. Never even dated anyone other than him. This weekend my friends came over to show support and help me paint the new apartment. I turn 40 next Tuesday and this is the best bday present I could ever give myself.
posted by TestamentToGrace at 11:37 AM on March 6, 2016 [58 favorites]

You probably know the drill but this is the most dangerous time for you, so take all the precautions and be careful. Good luck.
posted by infini at 12:30 PM on March 6, 2016

TestamentToGrace: I shall think good thoughts in your direction.

In other exciting hair news:
This weekend, I rediscovered my long lost curls. I thought they were gone forever, but they were just playing hide and seek.

Yay! Curls!
posted by Michele in California at 12:46 PM on March 6, 2016 [3 favorites]

TestamentToGrace, I wish you all the best and admire your courage in taking what must be a difficult decision.
posted by dg at 2:25 PM on March 6, 2016 [5 favorites]

hugs to everyone who needs them. TestamentToGrace, happy birthday, and many happy returns. Good luck!

so I have been struggling with Big Life Changes and 2 weeks ago left a miserable stressful temp job managed by harpies after being laid off several months ago from the well-paid but ultimately dead-end, struggling, stressful and going-nowhere corporate job that I worked at for 7 years.

This week my amazing husband reaffirmed to me for probably the fiftieth time that It Will All Be Okay and to please, take some time to do what is best for me, we are fine, we have insurance, the cats have kibble, the bills will all get paid on time without me having to work at a job that I hate and that stresses us both out because I am constantly miserable. He is encouraging me to go to school. I have never even properly applied for college. I will be 48 in a few months. I struggle with mild to moderate attention deficit and probably also executive function issues and anxiety, so this is all very uncharted territory for me, and probably why I never managed to organize my life to go to school in the first place, so in sum, argh.

BUT I am riding bikes and gardening and cooking plus my kitties are happy I am home a lot to pet them and some long overdue house chores are getting (mostly) done, plus last week I actually managed to get off my butt and went to caucus on Super Tuesday for the first time ever, so that happened.
posted by lonefrontranger at 3:43 PM on March 6, 2016 [8 favorites]

Also because we are at the bottom of the thread and nobody will look at this I acknowledged I have problems with alcohol, looked into AA, looked into the literature, rejected AA because the success rate is apparently abysmal, and wiil ask my doctor about naltrexone in a couple of days.

You might want to look into Rational Recovery as well. The 2c tour is that you focus on figuring out what needs the alcohol is filling, then come up with non-alcohol means of filling those needs. AA can be good if some of the needs you're filling are for community, accountability, or spirituality, but it's not the sinecure people tend to present it as.
posted by Deoridhe at 4:47 PM on March 6, 2016 [4 favorites]

Wife's been away for work for the last week and I'm so boring that I've basically done nothing but hang out at home and watch movies on Netflix/Hulu/Amazon and play Civ V.
posted by octothorpe at 5:05 PM on March 6, 2016

Man, lotsa people having a tough go of it.

Best, best, best to all of yall.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 6:00 PM on March 6, 2016 [4 favorites]

My girlfriend and I did go to Mexico City, and it was great! We got side eye a few times but no more than we do in NY (possibly less, even). I was thinking about posting a whole metatalk followup in case any fellow queers/trans people were wondering but decided to post it down here instead.
posted by (Over) Thinking at 6:33 PM on March 6, 2016 [2 favorites]

I had a kid a couple years ago and my mefi participation kinda tapered off. We moved to nyc about a year ago now too.
posted by thsmchnekllsfascists at 7:37 PM on March 6, 2016 [2 favorites]


BlueNorther and I have recently become rat-mums (she kept them as a teenager; I've never had the pleasure before now), and it is brilliant. (We want to increase to 3 or 4 eventually, but are letting this pair settle in properly first.)

These are Lewis & Hathaway, our 14-month-old rescue lads, who were rather undersocialised, and skittish about being handled, when we adopted them. Hathaway is coming on in (literal) leaps and bounds; and though Lewis is still somewhat shyer and more nervy, he's increasing in confidence by the day. They both enjoy romping around the room during their nightly free-range time, and are becoming more comfortable about being handled (Hathaway actually fell asleep inside my dressing-gown last night), so it's all looking promising.

And because MeFi = Obligatory!Catpix, behold our 16-year-old moggy Sabre, who has adjusted surprisingly well to the rodent mini-invasion (mainly by electing to ignore The Rat Room as being beneath his contempt).

posted by Morfil Ffyrnig at 6:01 AM on March 7, 2016 [5 favorites]

I'm doing laundry and drinking a Heineken.
posted by jonmc at 8:47 AM on March 7, 2016 [1 favorite]

I'm waiting for my new best friend, lover and partner and fellow mefite winter velvet to wake up (there she is!) so we can nerd out and have coffee and tea together.

She's amazing to me. We're both still just utterly stunned and flummoxed that either of us would ever even be into someone else, or that it could be so good.

I love you, gorgeous!
posted by loquacious at 9:15 AM on March 7, 2016 [9 favorites]

Err, I mean velvet winter. She's laughing at me for being a nerd who hasn't woken up yet.
posted by loquacious at 9:55 AM on March 7, 2016 [4 favorites]

But yeah, we laugh a lot and we fit together mentally, spiritually and physically like Lego to the point that we're both pretty overwhelmed, stunned and pleasantly surprised.

Neither of us historically do 5 hour phone or skype conversations, much less endless, easy eye contact for hours on end, much less are either of us usually even able to tolerate anyone for more than a few hours.

And we can barely get enough of each other. We're finding we have to struggle to schedule alone time just for personal sanity and quiet.

And, yeah, we actually met on MeFi and we've been aware of each other for a long few years, now, and for whatever cosmic (or comic!) reasons we almost wrote to each other multiple times, and then this past January 22nd I wrote to her. Turns out she almost wrote to me two days before after checking out my ambient/noise/drone album, because she's a dark ambient nerd and expert.

Totally fun fact about us that we've discovered: We were in the same slam dance pit for a Ministry show in 1992 at Lollapalooza #2 at Irvine Meadows, Orange County, California, which may have actually been the largest non-metal pit in the history of the universe. (We're talking 10,000 people suddenly going hyperkinetic, a "circle" or "wash" several thousand people strong.)

Chances are really good that we actually physically bumped into each other more than once that night over twenty years ago.

Partially because I was so anti "circle" or "wash" in slam dancing pits back then that I decided I had to fight my way upstream this huge wash for as long as I could. I made it upstream for three or for cycles, long enough to annoy the hell out of people who saw me fighting/pushing my way upstream multiple times. I was so beat up after that I could barely walk out of the arena.

Anyway, we're both very glad we met now, and not then. We probably wouldn't have liked each other so damn much, like we do now, or be so ready or prepared for each other.
posted by loquacious at 10:12 AM on March 7, 2016 [6 favorites]

loquacious and winter vervet velvet winter, sitting in a tree...
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 11:00 AM on March 7, 2016 [1 favorite]


They are awesome. Your Hooded has the same coloration as the one I had many years ago. Awww...
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 11:01 AM on March 7, 2016 [2 favorites]

sitting in a tree

You have no idea! (No, seriously, she hugs and talks to trees and I love it. Kissing in trees are happily already a thing.)
posted by loquacious at 11:03 AM on March 7, 2016 [4 favorites]


aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh, the schmoopy is rolling off the screen in roiling hormonal clouds and scrambling my synapses aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh


posted by infini at 2:00 PM on March 7, 2016 [4 favorites]

posted by Joseph Gurl at 3:49 PM on March 7, 2016

I spent most of today writing library policy to better accommodate non-gender-binary library users. And I had shrimp tacos for both lunch and dinner. Even saw the lights of the Goodyear blimp (not really).
posted by box at 6:14 PM on March 7, 2016 [8 favorites]

the schmoopy is rolling off the screen in roiling hormonal clouds and scrambling my synapses

Ah, I know the feeling. Schmoopy overload!

So what am I up to? For one thing, I've become much more serious about getting my writing career off the ground. I've now got an indie publisher I'd love to work with interested in one of my book manuscripts. I've got some wonderful supporters on Patreon who want to read more of my writing, and are helping to make that financially possible for me, little by little. I'm being interviewed next week for a project on Pagan leadership. I'm increasingly sought after to do proofreading work for dark ambient musicians' album liner notes and promo blurbs. I'm working on the third article in my well-loved series on underrated dark ambient albums for one of the most highly respected online publications in the goth/industrial music scene.

I am head-over-heels in luuuuurve, dear MeFites. With my own life...and with MeFi's own loquacious, too! Can't believe MeFi actually DID get me a real date...and partner. Thank you, MeFi!

Here's the story I posted to my Facebook friends in February when I switched my relationship status to "in a relationship" and posted a sweet photo of us:
This is my sweetheart, friend, and feminist queer-nerd partner. We met on MetaFilter, a great online community where he is known by the username "loquacious" and I am known as "velvet winter."

We followed one another on MeFi for years, commenting appreciatively on one another's posts occasionally. In January, I visited his profile for the first time in awhile, and noted that he'd made some ambient/drone tracks I liked. I made a mental note to write to him privately to encourage him to make more music, and to tell him how much I enjoyed his writing.

In a bit of serendipity, two days after I visited his profile (I hadn't yet written to him), he wrote to me privately. He told me that he'd recently visited my profile, and had noted that we had lots in common. He also wrote that, while he wasn't in any particular hurry to end his singleness, he "couldn't help but wonder" whenever he looked at my profile and posting history on MeFi, and would I perhaps like to chat more?

In the space of a few weeks, we went from long nerdy emails to 4-5 hour phone conversations to spending blissful time visiting together in person...and here we are.

He says: "...it's only been like four days and we act like we've been happily married for 20 years."

posted by velvet winter at 8:27 PM on March 7, 2016 [15 favorites]

You are both too adorable for words. I'm really happy for y'all!
posted by ocherdraco at 9:21 PM on March 7, 2016 [4 favorites]

*sniffles with joy on a hard wooden pew while the Bishop drones on about to have and to hold*
posted by infini at 2:49 AM on March 8, 2016

I'm having insomnia.

But hey, it's almost spring in TN and even next week's trip to Boston looks to not be too cold. And, instead of sleeping tonight, I seem to have gotten my head around reification of types in haskell, and have some interesting designs docs thanks to this most recent leveling up in the neverending tower of abstraction. In the wee hours, decided to go ahead and have a real event for my upcoming 40th b-day -- on a mountain top!

Also I'm feeling super fortunate to be able to work on basically whatever I want due to having my main project funded by NSF, plus a no-strings grant that's supporting my more blue-sky endeavors for a while.
posted by joeyh at 3:39 AM on March 8, 2016 [3 favorites]

Very happy for loquacious and velvet winter :-) and maybe a little jealous!

Because I'm so happy and relived about it, I feel I have to tell people - my permanent job appointment was confirmed yesterday so I get to keep being able to pay all my bills on time!
posted by dg at 2:03 PM on March 8, 2016 [15 favorites]

I need to confess it, I'll use this thread -

There's a guy who's been a friend a couple years now, and while it is platonic, occasionally our definition of "platonic" has been...flexible. We've been behaving for the past six months, but I have just realized that I am fostering a new tiny crush.

Just in time for the camping trip we've planned in 3 weeks.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 3:30 AM on March 9, 2016 [4 favorites]

Today, 20 years after leaving the fold of fundamentalist christianity (and some 34 years after joining them) today I finally managed to give away all the bibles, bible commentaries and assorted christian literature I had been to scared to even look at for almost two decades. I looked through each one this afternoon (to erase my name in the fly leaves) without any particular emotion, and packed them up, and left them at the doorstep of a local fundamentalist church. I am so proud of myself for closing this chapter.

As there is not really anyone in real life aside from my therapist who appreciates this for me huge accomplishment (most people I know today do not even know of this past) this seems an good place to share. Thank you for reading.
posted by 15L06 at 10:35 AM on March 9, 2016 [25 favorites]

*sniffles with joy on a hard wooden pew while the Bishop drones on about to have and to hold*

Heh, if that's a response to velvet winter and I, there will never be a Christian bishop or hard wooden church pews involved - though the sentiment is appreciated.

Much more likely is a forested glen with lots of hanging moss, drizzling rain and maybe a trans lesbian pagan priestess.

Anyway, we're already MeFi-married, which will more than do!
posted by loquacious at 10:54 AM on March 9, 2016 [5 favorites]

Get a room, you two.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 11:44 AM on March 9, 2016

Get a room, you two.

Surely you mean take it to memail.
posted by phunniemee at 12:22 PM on March 9, 2016 [6 favorites]

I bought a flat-packed desk online back in January, it took forever to get shipped. Then I tried to assemble it over the weekend. It took eight hours and counting! But the worst part is, it's missing a crucial piece. So now it's half assembled in the living room and I have to wait days to see if the overstock warehouses have a replacement.

I should have just gone to Ikea.
posted by anotherpanacea at 12:27 PM on March 9, 2016 [1 favorite]

MeMail has rooms now? pb's really upped his game.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 12:43 PM on March 9, 2016 [1 favorite]

*sniffles even louder*

posted by infini at 4:25 PM on March 9, 2016

Typing this up while really early at work and with three hours worth of sleep...

Last Monday marked two years since one of my good friends from way back in college died from complications with leukemia or whatnot. It was sudden and depressing when it happened back then, and it's still depressing now looking at recent posts on Facebook from the people who still remember him fondly. He was a good soul, really.

Our circle of friends only met up occasionally throughout the year prior to his passing, but it wasn't as if we'd really gotten out of touch with each other whenever we did meet. To me, he always felt like the one guy who went out and did what he wanted to do after school; he had a career in advertising, got married to a friend of mine and had a kid with her. He and his wife told me many years ago that they felt I should really take up writing in one form or another as a career, and that has always stuck with me.

He is missed. That was all I wanted to say. Stay strong and keep at it, guys and gals.
posted by FarOutFreak at 6:04 PM on March 9, 2016 [9 favorites]

Get a room, you two.

Why, I've barely left her room all week! Would you like to know more? I have notes! Maps even!

I've been cooking for us almost every night and I am excited to announce have invented a variation of cilantro lime chicken that's apparently a dangerously powerful aphrodisiac and central nervous system stimulant bordering on a dissociative anesthetic that we have named "Cilantro Sex Chicken with Happy Lime Cocaine Sauce".

There will be a recipe posted at some point. It's amazing.

I have happily learned that there may be rather little else more nauseating than two really brainy, practical, existentialist and rather, uh, romantically and intimately experienced and very strange and rather queer nerds utterly falling for each other.

I haven't laughed, cried, trembled and shivered so much in my entire life. You guys? We're fucking besotted. You have no idea. It's amazing, profound, and terrifying. (I love you, nerd!)

posted by loquacious at 3:23 PM on March 10, 2016 [6 favorites]

This is thread capture, right here! Mods! do something, quick!
posted by infini at 3:37 PM on March 10, 2016

I just had a little \o/ eureka! moment during my usual routine of browsing the net, finding lots of interesting new things, opening too many tabs, wanting to discuss, share, archive, create, start.. way too many things at once - One of my major griefs is always wanting too much and going through with, let alone finish, so little. But suddenly this amazing feeling overwhelmed me: Hey, I'm overflowing with ideas! Come at me, world!
posted by dnial at 5:11 AM on March 11, 2016 [2 favorites]

As of today, I am halfway through with the pre-clinical part of medical school. A year from now I'll be on rotations.
posted by ocherdraco at 7:58 AM on March 11, 2016 [15 favorites]

Congratulations, ocherdraco! I remember when you were starting and it doesn't even seem that long ago.
posted by Room 641-A at 8:04 AM on March 11, 2016

It wasn't. 😀 I just started last August! But my program does the pre-clinical coursework in 1.5 years rather than the traditional 2.
posted by ocherdraco at 8:19 AM on March 11, 2016 [1 favorite]

It's been an ... unusual year. In November, I accidentally got a dog. Later, my son outplayed his dad and every person in the state to win the Florida State Pinball Championship (again). So we're going to Las Vegas (first time for all of us) later this week so he can compete in Nationals. Never thought I'd go to Vegas. Kid found me a nice botanic garden to visit while there, so I can stay sane.

Kid is also graduating this year, so I'm officially retiring from being a homeschooling mom/teacher. Because life is big and kind of weird, I find myself jumpstarting this new phase of life by co-authoring a novel with one of my long-time literary favorites, R. A. MacAvoy. The two of us are scrambling through the mire that is self-publishing, learning a lot and having fun along the way. Details at ramacavoy.com. (Anybody want to throw self-promotion tips at me, memail me!) Started my own new website too, which has rather a steep learning curve. But pushing half a century on the planet, I think it's good to seek out those steep curves.
posted by Nancy_LockIsLit_Palmer at 7:21 PM on March 13, 2016 [4 favorites]

Today is my birthday. I'm going to spend a lot of it grading, but later I'll go to a prison and meet with some awesome folks.

My daughter was really struggling this morning with the Daylight Savings Time switch.

Happy Pi Day everyone!
posted by anotherpanacea at 4:16 AM on March 14, 2016 [4 favorites]

OK I'll play.

in 2015 both my wife and I got promotions (new job titles, new take-home pay, hooray!). Finally were able to replace the poor old aging car we'd been driving since 2002! I am not in the lab doing SCIENCE any more but have discovered that I am weirdly good at being an administrative person. Plus, no more soft money paycheck = I can stop worrying about whether or not I can make the house payments.

Have our son in Cub Scouts. He is having a blast. I get to wear a uniform and lead meetings. 7 year olds have a lot of energy. Mostly fun!

I signed up for a marathon again because the last one I did was in 2013 and I have been too lazy lately. As in "I ran every day for a year and burned out so then I didn't run any days for a year to make up for it" lazy. I have until October to get my ass in shape.

It is spring-ish which means I am making maple syrup again. My urban sugar bush consists of two maple trees in my front yard, collectively hosting 3 buckets, total of 25 L maple sap so far. That means (assuming standard sugar content) I'll net ~20 oz of syrup. If I'm lucky. It got warm fast, that may be all she wrote for the year. (Last year I pulled ~80 L but nearly all of it went bad on me before I could boil it down!)

Lastly, the note under the comment box reminds me that everyone needs a hug. Go on then. Give yourself a nice hug. Awwwwww.
posted by caution live frogs at 10:43 AM on March 14, 2016 [6 favorites]

I have decided that life is too short and if a novel has not grabbed me by halfway through I reserve the right to drop it on the floor or throw it across the room (actually I have Kindle so I actually just delete them). There are too many books out there to spend time on crap (Sturgeon's Law, 1951).

I have learned a great trick for perfect posture. Look up, straight up. This pushes out your chest and brings your shoulders down. Then move only your head down, sort of lock the rest of your body. Voila! Perfect posture.

I recently got a freelance gig being a test proctor. It was a tough application, interview, training, and certification but I got through it all and start working next month.

My good friend from elementary school on through jr and sr high died of a sudden illness. He was 43 years old, same as me. He was a genuinely funny guy, and I guess I'm in the denial phase of grief: I can't quite believe he's gone. It's kind of a wake up call and reminder that although I'm not old old, I'm not young anymore. And this train only travels in one direction--towards old old. My friend was the first person in my graduating class to, well, die, and that list will only get longer as the years go on. Anyway.
posted by zardoz at 5:29 AM on March 15, 2016 [4 favorites]

I am turning 50 in a couple of months. I don't have a big momentous goal planned for this year, but instead a bunch of smaller ones.

My completely wonderful BF and I have been together for about two and a half years. We go hiking almost every week, and it's our little adventure in the woods. Just walking up to the top of something, sitting down with a PB&J and looking out into the distance is the best part of my week.

I have a newish job at a bike shop--which a fellow-Mefite helped me find. Some of my shop-mates are half my age and I've learned what it must have felt like for my older colleagues to be alongside 25-year-old me (though to be clear, my co-workers are way more mature than I was). So yeah, perspective.
posted by computech_apolloniajames at 8:29 PM on March 15, 2016 [6 favorites]

Divorce is slowly creeping towards completion... this is progress, I suppose. Change is hard, and scary.
posted by Jacen at 8:05 PM on March 28, 2016 [7 favorites]

I'm late to this thread, but this month, I finally came out to my circle of friends. So now, my partner isn't the only IRL person who knows I'm bi. My friends weren't at all surprised. We've been friends since high school.
posted by persephone's rant at 7:49 PM on March 29, 2016 [9 favorites]

Whole30 is what changed. Lost about five kilos without even noticing it. I can't believe it.
posted by Namlit at 1:04 AM on March 31, 2016 [2 favorites]

Whoa, last day to post in this thread -- thanks pjern for the reminder. What's going on? I just moved another T-shirt shop across town, just in time for SXSW. I keep trying to run away from my own success in this nutty industry because deadlines & clients stress me the fuck out, but everywhere I go, there I am. On my third job in 2 years, but it's okay. I'm in the acceptance phase of grief over my formerly good salary at the company with The Client Who Shall Not Be Named (Rhymes with The Clive) that I left because I just. Could. Not. Take. them one more day. I find myself managing a little (ha, growing like a weed) shop full of misfits like myself -- I think we've got a bit of an asylum for those who don't fit in anywhere else. I've already rescued another former employee from TCWSNBN. Busy as fuck all day long, but staying fed. Also working on my art prints in my spare time (again, ha!) & thinking about setting up a real dark room. I am officially operating my retail shirt biz as a sole proprietorship with a tax ID # & everything. Man, accounting takes up SO MUCH TIME!

Speaking of time, I am on a bit of a web hiatus -- totally off the Facebook, total news blackout (Thanks Obama!) & not looking at the internet during work hours/after 10 pm in an attempt to reset my brain away from the kibble response of the internet drip. Maybe that's why I didn't notice this thread until last night. No less stressed out yet, but I'm sure as fuck less stressed out about Donald Trump in particular. Thanks desjardins for the kick in the right direction with that.

In other news, one of my bands has a 2-night stand at The Cavern Club in Liverpool at the end of May, and that is a really huge deal for a kid whose interest in music was totally sparked by the Beatles at age 6. Going on a pilgrimage. Passport acquired (that needed done anyway) tickets booked, rooms reserved. I'm going on tour!! Ha.

My amazing daughter is already looking at new opportunities at her amazing job and may find herself working on a project related to Orion within the year -- her dream job. My dream kid. We talked on the phone yesterday & she'd be moving to Colorado, which is well, awesome, because we've been looking for houses in Albuquerque and if we move when the youngest Rancher gets out of high school in a couple years, I'd get to see her more often than Christmas. Not going anywhere right away, but I am aging out of Austin, & Albuquerque looks like a place I'd rather be some day. We could bank the change if we sell in Austin & buy there, which makes it possible. Kinda stoked about that idea, long-term.

Lastly, sorry I've been a bit of a grumpypants around here. I've got a cynical streak a mile wide that I really need to reflect on before I hit post. Knowing you have a problem is half the battle, right?
posted by Devils Rancher at 12:04 PM on March 31, 2016 [6 favorites]

I started bicycle commuting this month.
I haven't bike commuted in almost two decades, but I loved it when I did it.
I am loving it now. I am also loving people watching on the bus.
It's a weird life update, but, man, is it good to get back to something that you enjoy and that is good for you.
posted by Seamus at 1:23 PM on March 31, 2016 [7 favorites]

Last time I posted here, I was working on ways to make the library more accommodating of gender-nonconforming folks. Now, I'm working on ways to reduce the barrier that library fines create for library users. I still love my job. Also, I got a new hat. I like it a lot. And did you know that Green Earl Grey tea is a thing? Tea worlds collide, it's pretty great.
posted by box at 5:55 PM on March 31, 2016 [8 favorites]

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