Fucking Fuck XI May 15, 2018 6:24 AM   Subscribe

"Please excuse me for some profane words," Spike Lee asked his audience at his new film's Cannes premiere, "But the shit that’s going on, it makes you want to curse. [...] … stuff is happening, and it’s topsy-turvy and the fake has been trumpeted as the truth. " This is the new fucking fuck venting thread.

Please feel free to use this thread and MetaChat to share your anxieties, your coping strategies, your hopes and fears. And many thanks for helping to keep the ongoing US politics mega-threads information-dense and for reducing the workload for the awesome mod team. Everyone needs a hug.
posted by Doktor Zed to MetaFilter-Related at 6:24 AM (188 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite

OMG thanks Doktor Zed. I was just coming here to start one of these.

I've given up on keeping up. There's just too much, and it's all so incomprehensibly destructive I just, I just can't even Even anymore. We lost our beloved 10 year old yellow lab Otto 3 saturdays ago and it was utterly heartbreaking for such a completely innocent creature to fall to cancer. And we were the ones who had to make the decision on when so it was as painless and easy for him as possible. There are so many evil assholes out there that deserve such a fate, but no it had to come and take our Otto?

God DAMN it I hate these assholes. WHEN is the nightmare going to fucking end, you guys?
posted by yoga at 6:31 AM on May 15 [25 favorites]


Popping in.

People have lost their fucking minds at work this week, and of course it's while my boss is out.

I'll make it though.

For those hitting up that Chat link, come on in! I'm idling in there most days, and if things aren't busy, I'll be talkative. There are periods of time where no one talks for a while, but don't let the quiet scare you. Stick around and start talking, and we'll get back to you! I love new visitors, and there's a crew of 5-10-ish people that we've somewhat acquainted ourselves and our pets with each other. I promise pictures of my cat on a 2-3 times weekly basis.
posted by deezil at 6:37 AM on May 15 [4 favorites]


yoga, deepest condolences for your loss. :(
posted by zarq at 6:39 AM on May 15 [6 favorites]


I'm so, so sorry yoga.
posted by lalex at 6:58 AM on May 15 [2 favorites]


A couple deleted. Sorry, but we can't have the I/P fight or similar here.
posted by taz (staff) at 7:01 AM on May 15 [14 favorites]


This is MetaTalk. So I guess we just aren't going to have it at all?
posted by snuffleupagus at 7:02 AM on May 15 [2 favorites]


I'm so sorry to hear that, Yoga. Such an awful feeling, and in the middle of all the rest of this. Hang in there!
posted by snuffleupagus at 7:03 AM on May 15 [2 favorites]


Yoga, I'm so sorry for your loss. We have a 10 y/o yellow lab and I can't even imagine your pain. Sending you major lab hugs.
posted by Nutritionista at 7:05 AM on May 15 [1 favorite]


You're welcome, yoga, and you have my sympathies—the loss of a pet always hits harder than it's easy to convey. And labs are such loving, good dogs.
posted by Doktor Zed at 7:08 AM on May 15 [1 favorite]


So sorry for your loss, yoga. Every grief is harder these days, it seems. Perhaps because we are all out of emotional energy. (And fucks. I ran out of those a while ago and am developing an insurmountable fucks deficit.)
posted by WordCannon at 7:17 AM on May 15 [3 favorites]


My sympathies, yoga.
posted by ZeusHumms at 7:30 AM on May 15 [1 favorite]


My sympathies to the 2000+ killed or injured protestors in Gaza, but also to Spike Lee whose new movie is out
posted by beerperson at 7:38 AM on May 15 [8 favorites]


I'm all out of fucks, I'm so lost without them
I know you were right, hoarding them for so long
I'm all out of fucks, what am I without them?
I can't be too late to say that it's all so wrong
posted by nubs at 8:00 AM on May 15 [13 favorites]


My dad's cancer is back and he's opting for a horrific surgery that involves breaking open his jaw to get at the back of his tongue where the cancer is and taking muscle and skin from his back for reconstruction. There will be an ICU stay of at least 4 days. He'll be turning 81 on the day of the surgery and he won't listen to anything about palliative chemo because he thinks that's giving up even though it very much isn't. Our relationship is ridiculously complicated due to his narcissism and my refusal to ignore said narcissism and how it fucked me up growing up but he's still my dad and I don't want anyone going through this. Also he has emphysema and I'm so worked up about the surgery that I haven't even begun to find out what THAT entails.

My daughter is graduating from high school in a couple weeks and it's good but it's also really sad because she's our youngest and while I certainly didn't give up my identity to be a mother, I'm really happy to call myself their mom and I'm afraid at some level that they won't need me anymore or I won't be able to transition to the mom of adults and it's all really scary and I don't know how to DO this part of my life anymore.

I've been casually looking for a new job not because I don't like the one I have but because there's no room for movement and I thought I was okay with that but I guess I'm not. Change is hard.

I have so much going on with my personal life that I can't even bear to keep up with the news and I feel like I'm failing everyone who doesn't have the privilege that I do but I'm barely keeping my head above water.

Fucking fuck, indeed.
posted by cooker girl at 8:00 AM on May 15 [21 favorites]


Oh jeez, and I didn't even mention the fact that my niece is slowly dying of some stupid rare kidney cancer that like never ever hits people under 65 but she's not even 30 and she has three little boys and I CAN'T EVEN. They've been trying to find a solution for like over two years now and she has lost so much weight and she's always sick and I hate everything.

Fuck cancer.
posted by cooker girl at 8:03 AM on May 15 [18 favorites]


Cooker girl, as another daughter of a narcissist, I'm so sorry. Take good care of yourself and protect your boundaries during this difficult time. I'm thinking about you.
posted by Sophie1 at 8:04 AM on May 15 [5 favorites]


Part of me wants to believe that culturally, we're going through Ragnarok. Part of me just really likes Immigrant Song.
posted by ZeusHumms at 8:08 AM on May 15 [12 favorites]


Not sure what the protocol in these FFF threads is - are fuck-recharging-moments allowed/welcome? If so, along with Spike Lee's tirade, prof. Glaude's Meet The Press moment is worth witnessing.

Edited for hugs & sympathies to yoga & cooker girl.
posted by progosk at 8:18 AM on May 15 [6 favorites]


(Also: here's the video of Lee's Cannes press conference.)
posted by progosk at 8:28 AM on May 15 [3 favorites]


Sorry, but we can't have the I/P fight or similar here.

That's fine, but can we at least be allowed to express anxiety and fear about what is happening in Gaza in the metatalk thread specifically intended for those things? Please?

Because 55 (almost definitely unarmed) Palestinians, including 6 children, were slaughtered yesterday and at least 1800 or more injured and it's goddamned heartbreaking. The White House is victim blaming. Israel, Hamas, Hezbollah and Iran are taking advantage of Trump's insecurity, ego and stupidity to escalate what was already a shaky situation, and once again innocents are being killed as a result.

I have a couple of friends whose kids are on Birthright right now, and also family who live in Israel. Hezbollah is saber rattling about increasing their missile attacks and Hamas is pushing their people to storm the Israeli border and it looks like we're about to see the entire region devolve into a shooting war with Iran. It's horrifying and scary as hell. And I don't see this ending well.
posted by zarq at 8:34 AM on May 15 [41 favorites]


I woke up to a flat tire yesterday and it just sort of set the tone for the rest of the day and what feels like the week. I'm hoping it gets better. But mostly I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted because I've been trying to date and meet someone the past few years and I'm approaching 40 and it's getting harder and harder and I'm just tired of failing at relationship stuff. Add in the constant pressure of my friends and family making comments, “Shouldn't you be married by now?” “So all the cousins are married and have kids, when are you going to settle down?”

“Shouldn't you mind your fucking business Aunt I barely see every few years.”

Ugh, fuck this.
posted by Fizz at 8:49 AM on May 15 [7 favorites]


You know how can get so tired you're not even sleepy, or so hungry you don't even feel it anymore? And it's almost a blissful feeling? This is how I am right now except with panicking about money (never mind the state of the world). My life is so ridiculous it's become amusing. No job, dead cat, car accident. Something else is going to happen, I can feel it, but whatever.
posted by AFABulous at 9:05 AM on May 15 [2 favorites]


“So all the cousins are married and have kids, when are you going to settle down?”

"So, what I'm hearing is you're available for free babysitting at least three times a week for the next 20 years and you'd like to donate very generously to their college fund, yes? No? How about you have your own damn kids and keep your mind out of my pants and reproductive organs, then?"
posted by loquacious at 9:07 AM on May 15 [8 favorites]


As Lee also mentions, this grand fuckery is going strong all over the place - the latest out of Hungary is that Soros is looking to close the Open Society Foundations offices there (relocating to Berlin), and Orbán's equally despised Central European University is planning to move operations to Vienna.

Seen from Europe, this cancerous erosion of culture feels as ominous as it must be to live it, stateside. My current hoping/coping strategy is to ardently believe that Yanis Varoufakis will help us all save what's left of Europe...
posted by progosk at 9:10 AM on May 15 [3 favorites]


HELLO I HAVE NOTHING TO PERSONALLY VENT ABOUT.

I just pet, thumped, hugged, pestered and wrassled a cat till I think I broke her purrbox and she went a little bit crazy and is now outside tearing and flopping about in the grass and yarping at birds.

The weather has been glorious. I wore no jacket or hoodie at all for the first time in months yesterday. I have seen an otter or seal pretty much every day. I'm getting into the groove at work. I get to do my office work sitting by the dock on city WiFi in the best office I've ever had. It's just ridiculously nice.

WAIT OK MAYBE I'M A LITTLE FREAKED OUT ABOUT THE STATE OF POLITICS W/R/T TRANS HEALTH AND RIGHTS BUT I'M BEING BRAVE AND FUCK THE FUCKING FUCKERS, YO. LOVE WINS.

I feel a lot of my self-work in the last year and change has really been a response to the fuckery and politics. I'm not just getting into better mental/physical shape for myself. My biggest worry is shit is going to get really shitty and people will need me, and if that happens I want to be strong, both emotionally and physically.

And I mean the above very humbly. No weird hero fantasy shit. If things get really weird and bad it's all the hard, little things that matter. The boring things. Clean water, hot food, shelter, first aid and kindness.

And that being said, I want to say thank you to everyone for keeping on, and getting active with phone calls and contacting reps and fighting shitty and malicious garbage everywhere. Thank you especially personally to everyone fighting for queer/trans health care and rights and paving the way. Thank you so, so much.

DON'T LET THE FUCKERS GET YOU DOWN. YOU'RE STRONG. YOU'RE STRONGER THAN YOU EVEN KNOW. STAY UP. KEEP FIGHTING. IT MATTERS.
posted by loquacious at 9:29 AM on May 15 [15 favorites]


Fucking Fuck XI

If this was Doctor Who — Doctor Fuck? — we’d soon be in danger of needing a hand-waving explanation for why we are passing the arbitrary number of regenerations we decided on ages ago, making many pedantic nerds unhappy, just in time to make them lose their misogynistic shit when the 13th Doctor Fuck is a woman!
posted by Celsius1414 at 10:08 AM on May 15 [1 favorite]


So what's driving me crazy this afternoon is that 45 and his henchmen are running around blatantly violating the law and not even trying to hide it because they've learned that there are no fucking consequences when they blatantly violate the law. None, zero, zilch. So, of course, why would they stop doing it? They're making money hand over fist and trashing NATO and it's going great for them, and no one who could stop them will stop them because power and Party and tribalism. And it makes me want to fucking break things and scream.
posted by holborne at 10:11 AM on May 15 [7 favorites]


"The 13th Doctor Fuck" is my new sockpuppet username.
posted by nebulawindphone at 10:12 AM on May 15 [11 favorites]


I am thankful for this thread and thankful for this place. I have it relatively good, but boy do I get depressed about the state of the world. We have so many many people who don't understand the arc of history, and who so blindly contribute to decisions and policies that reward short term gain at the expense of peace and prosperity for all, or even the future of humanity. So many people who have been convinced that every aspect of life is a zero-sum game and that anger is the best way to be heard, or to be recognized, or to succeed. We put so little importance on education, unless it serves the wheels of the capitalist machine, or perpetuates xenophobic ideologies.

I have just typed and erased 4 different paragraphs and while i can't find a way to adequately express my frustration at it all , i find it cathartic to at least attempt it here. that is all.
posted by OHenryPacey at 10:31 AM on May 15 [15 favorites]


Fucking fuck. A "friend" started an instagram argument with me claiming I don't care about POC because I bought shorts from Walmart. Because I must "care" because I posted about the white privilege around weed on 4/20. (I do care, deeply.) I didn't engage. But really, THIS? You're berating the disabled woman? About THIS?!! Now!? When shit is FALLING DOWN AROUND US IN OUR OWN COUNTRY AND I CAN'T EVEN WORK SO MAYBE I NEED THE CHEAP SHORTS! I literally told her I agree, but her time is best spent on the bigger picture. Fuck man. Fuck off with that shit. Fuck off with micromanaging people in your life rather than calling your fucking senators or calling out the corporations for their practices instead of trying to shame the disabled woman. Fuck, man.
posted by Crystalinne at 10:31 AM on May 15 [10 favorites]


I've had to stop paying attention to the potus45 threads again. As the saying goes, "no spoons left, only knives". I'm trying to keep my mind on the good things:

* Today marks 5 months in my 12-step program and 5 months of sobriety from my defined bottom line behaviors. I'm connecting with members of the fellowship and people are starting to reach out to me (TO ME!!??) for support when they're Feeling It.

* I have a new (to me) motorcycle and I am very much in love with her

* My roommate's cat seems to know when I'm down, and he'll sit on my chest and purr insistently at me to cheer up

* In the next couple of weeks, we get Deadpool 2 and Solo, so I have reasons other than work and therapy to get out of the house.
posted by hanov3r at 11:16 AM on May 15 [18 favorites]


I had been, earlier this year, making good progress on getting to be friends again with the ex who I'd been friends with for give or take twenty years before we tried going out. She had abruptly stopped speaking to me over what I confirmed with other people was genuinely nothing, but I'd kind of put it down to realizing she didn't want to be friends after all. Which--I could live with. She's since, though, done virtually the same thing to two other friends, including rampant angry subtweeting--one of them she's made some small talk with since but the other she completely burned bridges with out of nowhere. In all cases, she never responded to invitations to hang out, and then suddenly started raging about the other person not prioritizing her enough as though we'd all cancelled on her instead of the other way around. At least there's an ever-dwindling number of people we both still talk to, but she's leaving this giant trail of wreckage through my entire social group that is rendering it virtually impossible to move on.

This has led to several of us having to go to the admin of a group we're all in to ask for her to be removed for the sake of the growing number of people who are uncomfortable with her continuing to be around--she's been pretending everybody she's mad at doesn't exist, but that's making conversations incredibly awkward and nobody wants to have any personal conversations around her right now. Which meant that last night turned into the super traumatic process of screencapping receipts for everything she's done, and I basically cried all last night and I'm still wishing I could be crying at work today.

My whole social group just feels like it's been maimed by these past two years, and every time I think it can't get any worse, it starts getting worse again. Like, what else is there to go wrong? But on the other hand, I didn't think this would go this much more wrong, either. Like I know I should be telling myself that things will get better and that eventually I'll meet someone else nice and all those standard things, but man is it hard not to give that some side-eye right now. I know I need to get out of Omaha and to somewhere I can find some people I feel safer with and that this will help, but who has the energy?
posted by Sequence at 11:40 AM on May 15


Thanks for the kind words, you guys. And Nutritionista will you please give your yellow a gigantic hug and many many extended pats for me? Like enough pats to make a small pile of yellow fur you can throw out the window for the birds to swipe for their nests?

Mrs yoga and I have put down a deposit on an expected lab puppy soon, we visited the breeder last weekend and it helpd us a bit with dealing with losing Otto. She had like 15 beautiful and perfect labs - yellows, blacks and a couple of chocolates. They were such perfect examples of English labs: beefy and just pure licky, waggy, hairy creatures made of 100% love. One litter is due next Monday, one is due about 3 weeks after that.

We are trying not to get our hopes up because the mom is black and the dad is yellow and it's totally unpredictable what colors & sexes will arrive until they come out. (We requested a yellow male.)

We're ignoring the people who poopoo getting dogs from breeders and "get a shelter dog!!!!' guilt. We've had many rescues alongside our breeder babies and we love them all equally. But holy hell we miss Otto terribly.

Ok I'm done with the lab derail you guys.
posted by yoga at 11:42 AM on May 15 [2 favorites]


I’m on my way right now to find out if I have endometrial cancer, guys!

Fucking fuck, I hate my uterus.
posted by greermahoney at 12:06 PM on May 15 [17 favorites]


greermahoney, I'm crossing my fingers, my eyes and all other body parts that will cross, and wishing you the best possible outcome.
posted by Too-Ticky at 12:24 PM on May 15 [6 favorites]


I'm off Facebook and Twitter, and I don't own a smartphone. Getting rid of a lot of the noise in my life has ratcheted down my anxiety tremendously. I still follow the news via RSS but a lot of the clickbait nonsense is gone, thank fuck. Meds and therapy are working reasonably well. I'm enjoying the mental equilibrium while I've got it.

Which is useful because life is crazy as hell right now. Sweet child has entered toddlerhood and BOY HOWDY is it a wild ride. Workload is heavy lately and I've worked through lunch about 80% of the time for the past month. And last night there was a storm, so at home we have no internet, and also, either our drain is backed up or the bath is clogged, not sure which yet.

And that's to say nothing of WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS IRAN SHIT? and everything else that's happening.

Also it's national police week here in DC. I was out front of my church Sunday morning on greeting duty and saw a lot of cops walking around in groups. We have a Black Lives Matter sign in front of our church. Several cops took selfies in front of the sign in broad daylight with middle fingers raised or covering the word "Black" with their badges or MAGA hats. One of them shouted "SUCK MY DICK [church name]" while walking away. So anyway, fuck cops.
posted by duffell at 12:44 PM on May 15 [14 favorites]


Same. I hope you get good news, greermahoney.
posted by zarq at 12:44 PM on May 15 [1 favorite]


After a much needed hiatus I am back on MeFi. I am gearing up to switch careers, maybe for good if the benefits package works out. I have fought hard to have my needs met at work so I can have energy to do the things necessary to make my career switch happen. My family just gave me money so I can go to therapy every week for the next 3-4 months. Everything seems to be coming up roses on paper but in reality I'm in a hypomanic/depressive hyper cycle and it's really exhausting. My psychiatrist, whose intent was very good and kind, said that my stuff is difficult to treat because I am so "high functioning", which really means I have tapped into such extensive levels of cortisol to fuel my survival tactics that nobody can tell I'm sick because I don't LOOK it. Do people really have to see it to believe it? Why? God.

Much love and hugs to you all, though. I am glad to be back.
posted by Hermione Granger at 1:04 PM on May 15 [11 favorites]


Big hugs to cooker girl and greermahoney.
posted by yoga at 1:10 PM on May 15 [2 favorites]


duffell—the behavior you describe from the police officers is horrifying and sad and I just can’t anymore.

I’m keeping away from the news right now because I’ve had a rough few days and I need to unplug and try to recharge. But everything just seems sad and mean—and at the same time it also seems so normal now and that’s frightening to me.

Take care of yourselves, everybody! Hugs, hand clasps, and/or arms around the shoulders to all who need/want it.
posted by bookmammal at 1:14 PM on May 15 [1 favorite]


They fucked up the biopsy and they have to redo it. *sob*

Fucking fuck!!!
posted by greermahoney at 1:49 PM on May 15 [14 favorites]


greermahoney—I am so sorry. I know what it’s like to have to wait for medical news—and then to have to wait even longer feels so awful.
Keep putting one foot in front of the other—you can get through this. But yes, that shit is totally fucked up.
posted by bookmammal at 1:56 PM on May 15 [1 favorite]


Oh, and one of the coworkers who I figured was kind of conservative but who had at least seemed like a generally kind person made a comment earlier about the people in California being fruits and nuts. So, that was nice. I'm running out of the ability to think any person who skews right-of-center is anything other than a complete and utter asshole. Not even just a casual background asshole, but like the sort of people who only aren't treating me terribly because I'm not out at work.

I need a different job.
posted by Sequence at 2:32 PM on May 15 [4 favorites]


Huge storm. We lost power about an hour ago.

I lit our gas stove using a match and our kids think I'm a wizard now. :)
posted by zarq at 3:03 PM on May 15 [11 favorites]


Oh, damn it. So sorry, greermahoney. That's infuriating.
posted by zarq at 3:06 PM on May 15 [1 favorite]


Jesus. To greermahoney and yoga, I'm sorry. Both things are so shitty. Wishing the best for both of you.

To everyone else, this is just a very sad, very hard time. I feel it and I know you do too, and I wish I knew the answer. I wish we weren't all hoping Mueller would solve it, or that the midterms would change everything, because I know that institutions are unreliable saviors.

I know the president has a lot of power, but the degree to which his decisions can lead to actual blood in the streets has never been the palpable to me, especially since this one specialized in such performative sadism against people who are so powerless. I hate it. I hate this. I hate how little I can effect it. I hate that my trust in this democracy, which was always small, is now entirely absent.

Thank goodness there are still good people in the world. I will have to count on them, and try to be one of them.
posted by maxsparber at 3:06 PM on May 15 [6 favorites]


I am really, really, really scared for the future. And every day I grow a bit more relieved I do not have to raise children in this hellscape.
posted by mostly vowels at 3:23 PM on May 15 [2 favorites]


My kidney donor just got disqualified.
posted by mochapickle at 4:40 PM on May 15 [6 favorites]


I left work a little early because there wasn't anything to do any more. I might not make my numbers for the quarter at this rate. That might not matter because our job (like accounting but the parts that are too boring for actual accountants to do?) is in the beginning stages of being taken over by robots. Much like my team's immediately previous workload. This time, we don't have a new project lined up already, and leadership is just pretending we don't know why our teammate is going and showing a dude precisely how we make our decisions for the last two weeks. I'm going on a roadtrip in june so that's good, i guess. might not have a job later this summer.

and then there's the international, national, and local politics. it's all poppin' and ain't gonna stop. feeling like we need a neo dada movement. hopefully not because we're dealing with a grotesque war that, you know, eats a generation, or all of humanity.

brian eno ambient tracks are pretty good for self-soothing tho.
posted by wires at 4:57 PM on May 15 [1 favorite]


Oh Mochapickle!!!! I’m so sorry! As someone who was trying to donate to a friend, I know what a huge, long process that is, and the wait must be terrible. What a letdown. I hope another donor is a match, and soon.
posted by greermahoney at 5:03 PM on May 15 [3 favorites]


I'd settled into dialysis treatments and knew I had 7+ years for my blood type on the cadaver list, so I just thought I'd grit through it. My dad waited nine years, after all. And then my donor stepped up and insisted we test for a match since we have the same blood type and I started getting excited and started thinking about life after dialysis and now I'm an absolute wreck. And my donor sounded pretty upset when he called me and told me the news.

greermahoney, I hope you have good news ahead.
posted by mochapickle at 5:08 PM on May 15 [4 favorites]


I'm not going to pollute the megathreads with TV Tropes links, but it's crazy how many of them have been germane to the conversation, what with people referring to "The Writers" and all. Recently, the discussion has been circling around Virtue is Weakness.

I've shared my thoughts about irredeemable sociopaths before, so if anyone wants to act like a reality TV supervillain, I will always advocate responding in kind.
posted by Johann Georg Faust at 5:23 PM on May 15 [1 favorite]


Just heartbreaking, mochapickle.
posted by greermahoney at 5:25 PM on May 15


i had to leave the job i was on because the candidate did something in front of me that i found completely and totally unacceptable. and my boss- who had to leave himself— not only didn’t want to believe me, he gaslit me on it. i know he was really only gaslighting himself, i just wasn’t going along for the ride. and it completely fucked me up. i trusted this dude on a soul-deep level. like i don’t think anyone but my bff of ten years has ever gotten that close to me. and this guy, where we were the same person in opposite directions— this guy called me a liar. i am Not Taking This Well.

i’m lucky, though. i ran home to chicago, and my friends are putting me up and being really, really gracious about just how fucked up i am about it. (they are, unsurprisingly, mefites). and i’ll be working for someone i can trust in about three weeks. but i’m on some self-destructive bullshit right now and i don’t think i can get off of it. i’m in the fight till 2020 at least, and i’m unbelievably lucky that i get to lay it all down to fight this nightmare. like how fortunate am i? this is why i was made, really.

once again, i’ll be fine when i’m working. right now is hard, and i’m afraid it’s making me— not a great houseguest. but i’m currently uninsured and i’m doing that thing where i’m cutting my pills in half and taking them every other day until i get insurance again. it’s three weeks, i’ll be fine. and i’m in the greatest city in america again for the first time since 2016, so that’s awesome. right now is just hard, and a little scary.

i get the sense that we’re all doing what we can, most right-thinking people. i have conversations with total strangers on the train about it. keep hydrated. keep fighting. take care of yourselves. we need all of you if we’re gonna get through this.
posted by dogheart at 6:27 PM on May 15 [12 favorites]


DON'T LET THE FUCKERS GET YOU DOWN. YOU'RE STRONG. YOU'RE STRONGER THAN YOU EVEN KNOW. STAY UP. KEEP FIGHTING. IT MATTERS.

Listen to loquacious. They are wise. In an age of terror, even self-love is an act of resistance. Myself, I’m going back to the classics: I recommend one part Kathy Acker, one part David Wojnarowicz, and one part Marcus Aurelius. Take with a nice bath and music of your choice. God bless you and God bless the United States Of America.
posted by octobersurprise at 6:31 PM on May 15 [5 favorites]


Dogheart, that sucks. I’m so appreciative of the work you do. What a huge blow this must be. I’m glad you have awesome friends to help. We can get through just about anything with the right support.
posted by greermahoney at 6:56 PM on May 15 [1 favorite]


Hugs and chocolate and pickles, mochapickle.

I thought of you the other day. Of course I was eating chocolate and pickles. I still need to try to make some kind of peanut butter-pickle-chocolate sandwich.

ALSO ARGH MY E TEST IS WAY DOWN I KNEW IT, YE BUTTERED BUTTOCKS OF A BISCUIT-MONGER.

Though, this is actually good news and now I have proof of what my head/bod was telling me, and what I've been telling my doc that my dose is too conservative and low.

Work was... mellow, productive, low stress and highly enjoyable? I volunteered for a set of shifts today, figuring to also do office work. Instead, not one but two volunteers showed up unscheduled and wanted the shifts, freeing me up to actually go out and do my office stuff outside on city wifi. We had a lovely art class, too, doing some kind of cool acrylic marblization dumped paint over tiny canvases.

People are warming up to me and realizing my enthusiasm and energy is real (and infectious!), and that I mean what I say about asking if they'd like a break and that I am genuinely happy to pitch in on relief and being a team player.

I'm... relaxing nicely into the idea of not being yelled at at work and being in charge and not micromanaged. It's fucking fantastic and I haven't had it in so long, maybe 15 years. It's highly effective.

Wait, I'm sorry, y'all can rant about the fact I'm not ranting and swearing. The other day I was wondering when the next ranting tread was going to be and looking forward to it, and I just can't be arsed.

Well, I can rant about one thing and I can project that it will probably take up to 2 months to actually get a paycheck out of my job due tax season vs. weirdo non profit, and I knew that going into this, and I basically said "What the hell? Why not?" to the job because I wanted the activity and routine and mental engagement and it was an open door.

One of the things on the table for compensation is school/training for grantwriting.

I mean what I said about you (yes you) being strong, though. You're all beautiful, unique human beings. I wish I could share my enthusiasm more than just words - perhaps in little peppy energy drink bottles to hand out to anyone who needed one.

Because I feel fucking fantastic. I've felt great almost every day for months and months now. I wish all of you could feel how great and relaxed and stupendously content I've been feeling, while being neither bored nor unchallenged.

If I've been too much for you (yes, any of you) please know I'm earnest that I'm not writing or sharing these things to brag or preen on social media. For someone who has had their life be really awful for so long - I'm trying to share that not only are things not horrible everywhere, but that it actually does get better, sometimes.

Besides being alarmingly, genuinely chirpy for a spooky kid IRL, this is the only place I'm being this open or sharing these things.

Because this wouldn't have happened with MetaFilter and the amazing people that are in it. I've learned a lot about how to be a better person here. Perhaps most of it.

STAY THE FUCK UP, YOU GLORIOUS PEOPLE. LOVE YOURSELF. REMEMBER THE FLOWERS. REMEMBER PLEASURE AND SENSE. HAVE A GLASS, SMOKE ONE, EAT CAKE, MAKE LOVE, PET A CAT, LAY IN THE GRASS, TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF AND STAY UP.
posted by loquacious at 8:03 PM on May 15 [16 favorites]


ALSO MY TITS HURT. :(
posted by loquacious at 8:04 PM on May 15 [2 favorites]


I have ignored FaceBook because, well, it's FaceBook and that was working so well for me. Then I go to post a video of my wife's speech to her graduating students, and while waiting for the video to finish uploading, I scroll through idly.

Then I see this, from a family member who I didn't previously know to be a shit(ty) poster/Trumpeteer: "Breaking News: no matter what happens, we will twist it to make Donald Trump look bad." (It's a re-posted picture of Scott Peeley with that text.)

WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK. HAVE YOU READ OR HEARD THE THINGS HE WRITES AND SAYS? HE DOES IT TO HIMSELF AND EVERYONE AROUND HIM. WHAT THE FUCK.

Thanks MetaFilter for having this space where I can swear online, and not ostracize family members. While I want to shout at them (via a comment on FaceBook) I didn't, and I don't care enough to block them. This just reinforces my desire to generally avoid FB, despite my guilt at not sharing kid pics with distant relatives.
posted by filthy light thief at 9:35 PM on May 15 [1 favorite]


also okay this might be tmi but—i straight haven’t kissed a boy since 2016. i think i’m channeling that energy but my friends say maybe that’s not helpful. i don’t know.
posted by dogheart at 11:44 PM on May 15 [4 favorites]


Someone should tell my doctor that there are better ways to alert someone to the fact that they need to make some weight-and-cardiac-related lifestyle changes than to use the phrase "drop dead" twice in the space of twenty minutes.

Every single little physical twinge the subsequent weekend brought on an "Oh god is this it is this how I die" mini-panic attack. Pretty sure I'll be seeing another doctor next time.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 1:43 AM on May 16 [1 favorite]


Huge hugs to yoga, dogheart, cooker girl and greermahoney
posted by daybeforetheday at 1:48 AM on May 16 [5 favorites]


Jesus, I just had the weirdest dream. I was having dinner with Naomi Yang and Damon Krukowski and with Celine Dion and her husband and, this is where it gets weird, Celine was Naomi’s mother and spent the dinner chainsmoking and telling embarrassing stories about her childhood. And at one point, trying to divert the convo, I suppose, Celine’s husband starts telling me about how much she hates performing. I, trying to be gallant, say “No one who’s watched you perform could possibly believe that,” and she says “It’s true. I hate every moment of it!” And at that point I woke up.
posted by octobersurprise at 2:58 AM on May 16 [1 favorite]


Proposal: how about we negotiate a truce with the Trumpites? We'll re-assume control of the government but divert an extra $5 billion from the US budget to provide a special effects budget for Fox News. They can fictionalize the United States they'd like to live in and make it a television show, and we can handle the real world.

They've never had any interest in reality anyway.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 6:33 AM on May 16 [1 favorite]


Yesterday I spent 12 hours with my mom either in a car or in a hospital and it was a boring yet exhausting day. Today I have to accomplish a million things before I have to leave tomorrow and drive 500 miles to a wedding and then drive back on Sunday because I can't leave my cats for longer than a few days. And I'm still tired from yesterday.

Good news came out of yesterday though, my mom's heart is in tip-top shape, which is a blessing because heart problems run in the family.
posted by elsietheeel at 7:25 AM on May 16 [1 favorite]


So menopause is kind of destroying me at the moment; my moods are all over the place and I'm too fucked to go and get the blood tests and other things I need to take control of in order to get any help and in the meantime my teenage children are facing their own dilemmas which I feel increasingly unable to cope with and so therefore I feel like I'm contributing to their problems while at the same time I feel resentful that they aren't helping me with mine, which is absolutely not what I should be asking of them, although I do really feel that as they are getting older I should be able to ask them to do minor chores and have them done without constant.fucking.repetition. Mother's Day was a shit day, I cried and cried and lay in bed waiting for them to notice which was so passive-aggressive and horrible. Meanwhile my ex-partner and his wife are fighting all the time and bringing the kids into it and oh my god it's all so ugly and unnecessary and too fucking ridiculous for words. My poor boys.

So that's my little life all fucked up and ugly and not fun, meanwhile on the outside Australia's government is falling deeper into the abyss of right wing hatred and denial of the necessity for compassion as displayed by their off-shore concentration camps amongst so many other things, and our left wing Opposition are just as complicit and it just feels like a downward spiral. And everywhere else in the world, except maybe New Zealand, seems just as fucked up, if not worse.

I've isolated myself from my friends, my workplace is rapidly going downhill to the point that I think I'm going to fall short of my ten year long-service leave entitlement by about 6 months (it's a government tender which I don't think we're going to get and if we don't, I'll be out of work in January and I'll get nothing when I leave - 6 months short of 250 hours of pay), my teeth are fucked, my eyebrows are grey and spooky, my hair is both thinning and frizzy, my toes are wrinkly, my gut is larger than my boobs, my voice is croaky and my memory is decaying.

I'm just not a happy camper at the moment and I really can't feel any kind of optimism at all, which really fucking gives me the fucking shits because I really need hope to see me through and I really want my kids to be happy and hopeful and I'm trying so hard to be honest with them whilst at the same time not wanting to damage them by being so relentlessly unhappy.

It's all so fucked.
posted by h00py at 7:38 AM on May 16 [4 favorites]


Hugs h00py.
posted by greermahoney at 9:11 AM on May 16 [1 favorite]


I am *livid* about the plans to separate kids from their families and house them in concentration camps. And I'm *really upset* about the comparisons to prior administrations, which, while they weren't handling this as they should be, they weren't outright fucking EVIL about it, like these people are. It's just. Incredible.
posted by odinsdream at 9:15 AM on May 16 [6 favorites]


Thanks, everyone. I've decided to take FMLA for the surgery and at least half days for while he's in the hospital. After that we'll see how it goes.

I came home sick yesterday because I went to a clinic thinking maybe I had strep (my daughter had it a couple weeks ago) and I don't but I do have a fever and now I have UTI symptoms so yay? Seeing my doc today and I swear if they don't find something I'm gonna lose it. My throat is killing me, my bladder wants me to die and I HAVE SHIT TO DO DAMMIT.

Anyway, thanks for the love. I honestly don't know what I'd do without y'all. I have a wonderful support system IRL but sometimes I don't want to burden them, you know? Not that I want to burden you, but you get it.
posted by cooker girl at 9:34 AM on May 16 [4 favorites]


*Hugs the stuffing out of h00py*
posted by loquacious at 9:55 AM on May 16


I have strep fucking throat again/still. This round of antibiotics are fucking horse pills and I’m so exhausted. And I packed a lunch today and it’s leaked all over me in the rain as I was going to get my prescription filled. I’m a mess.

Big sanitary strep free hugs to everyone who’s going through some shit. I’m going to sleep now.
posted by bilabial at 10:08 AM on May 16 [4 favorites]




I keep thinking things can't get worse. I've been wrong at least 43 times. I used to think I had a fairly good imagination, but I'm no so sure any more.
posted by mule98J at 11:19 AM on May 16 [1 favorite]


Hey, I'm about to head to the ER for the second time in three days because getting proper treatment for "women's issues" is ridiculous. I have a history of complex ovarian cysts rupturing, and I knew, because this isn't my first rodeo, that I had a cyst and I was in pain, so I went to the ER. Well, I do, but it's a big old simple cyst, and they sent me home with a prescription for tylenol and told me that if I started having intermittent pain, it was a sign of ovarian torsion, and I should come back in right away. I was tired, frustrated, and in pain, so I didn't make the connection at the time, but before I even knew that ovarian torsion was something that could happen to me, right when I first describing my symptoms, I had off-handedly mentioned the very thing they told me to look out for. In a I've been feeling off and here's a thing that's been happening way. So now I'm going back and I'm hoping to get admitted to get this sucker out of me so my ovary doesn't get stuck that way. Yay! Blah.
posted by Ruki at 11:30 AM on May 16 [9 favorites]


I am finding myself hurt right now not by the expected - Trump & Co being awful - but by the unexpected- like supposedly progressive organizations taking advantage of the institutional climate to union bust. People who are trying to protect their bottom line through enabling ugliness while making mouth noises about #Resistance are making me crazy.
posted by corb at 12:34 PM on May 16 [4 favorites]


I've gained 20kg in 12 months having to buy new sizes twice. My "job" is part of the gig economy and last night I learned some dickhead who was already permanent and without the skills/qualifications I have, got himself a job invented which I'm brilliant at and he is crap at, and I'm still casual. I spent 40 hours fixing another dickhead's thesis and now he's threatening not to pay. I've 12 calendar days to bring two books up to publisher standards and none of the authors used the template or guidelines I gave them - so I have to fucking fix unnecessary stuff. And I'm tired, so tired of being a second-class citizen where I work (no long service for me - ever, no sick leave, no public holiday pay), that I don't want to go in today, but that will just make it harder for me. On top of that, as an autistic, when I've tried to get a new job, I don't ever get to interview stage so there's no point.
posted by b33j at 1:01 PM on May 16 [5 favorites]


Ruki, you have my complete empathy. Don’t know if you’re in the US, but healthcare here is a nightmare. And women’s healthcare doubly so. You know it’s bad when you’re complaining about the god-awful treatment you’re getting TO YOUR DOCTOR and she straight up blames the patriarchy in response.

I in no way disagreed, but at the same time that was fucking ridiculous.
posted by greermahoney at 1:44 PM on May 16 [3 favorites]


I'm tired. Just really tired.
posted by 80 Cats in a Dog Suit at 3:48 PM on May 16 [5 favorites]


So Mexicans are animals, their children are being sent to concentration camps and a literal Nazi is running on a platform of euthanasia for the poor. And nothing is stopping it. Nothing. I know despair is a sin but FFS.
posted by Space Kitty at 3:51 PM on May 16 [5 favorites]


Yep. UTI. With blood in my urine, apparently. I've taken one dose of the antibiotic and I'm feeling so nauseous that I'm seriously considering heading to bed. At 7:22 pm.

Hugs to all.
posted by cooker girl at 4:22 PM on May 16 [4 favorites]


b33j, I've gained a lot of weight in the last year too and it's very unsettling. I'm also literally having to replace my entire wardrobe repeatedly. Can't tell if it's age and a slowing metabolism or comfort eating for the apocalypse. I'm relieved I'm not alone.
posted by mostly vowels at 7:39 PM on May 16 [5 favorites]


What is the logic that motivates a person to only turn on their blinker once the light has turned green?

As a defensive driver it's my responsibility to anticipate what you'll do next. If I'm sitting behind you at an intersection and you have no turn signal on - well, I used to think that you weren't turning at all. Now I have to guess whether you're going straight or just doing this annoying no-turn-signal-until-the-green-light thing. Or whether you'll just completely surprise me.

And when you turn on the signal after the light turns green I have to recalculate my anticipation of what you might do next.

I just want to know why.

Don't get me started on drivers in this town...
posted by bendy at 8:58 PM on May 16 [1 favorite]


The HOA decided to replace the roof. Okay. Giant dumpster blocking my porch. Roofing nails like caltrops everywhere. Constant banging freaking the dogs out. They finally finish.

Unbelievable. The roofers are back. Why? Because of my new dryer.

The old dryer was kind of on its last legs. So when it stopped drying we figured it was time for a new one, which we purchased. But the new dryer wasn’t drying either. I’m pretty good at troubleshooting so I wondered if the fact that we had the roof replaced might have affected the venting. I actually came up with a few scenarios. Debris clogging the vent. The vent cap valve being jammed. And the ridiculous possibility that they shingled over the vent hole.

The dryer worked when it was not attached to the vent. Although the laundry area was… shall we say… moist.

Today the roofers are back. They go into the garage attic area. They remove the vent from the roof and USE A LEAF BLOWER TO BLOW THE CLOG OUT OF THE VENT STACK. INTO THE HOUSE.

Long story short, I speak to the boss on the phone. I tell him that I have a house full of dryer lint and several guys who are clueless. He comes by.

They shingled over the vent hole.

They fucking SHINGLED over the fucking VENT HOLE.

They are finally repairing their fuck up. Boss says fax him the receipt for the dryer and he'd cover it. Which is good. Our dishwasher just died.
posted by Splunge at 1:50 AM on May 17 [20 favorites]


Everyone needs a hug, but not the same kind of hug. Everyone here needs a good hug.
posted by ZeusHumms at 6:44 AM on May 17 [5 favorites]


I just want to know why. Don't get me started on drivers in this town...

It's Portland. They forgot, better late than never, and you're lucky they're even half-aware that there are other cars on the road.
posted by snuffleupagus at 6:55 AM on May 17 [3 favorites]


I did not get admitted. I did burst into tears in the exam room when they told me that I wasn't "in enough pain for surgery" and to follow up with GYN in FOUR TO SIX WEEKS. Yeah, fuck that noise. I called my GYN today, but she's out of the office until Tuesday, which happens to be my 39th birthday. I do my resolutions on my birthday, and this year, my resolution is that my ovaries will not be turning 40 with me.

My father in law hooked me up with painkillers so I can sleep. The ER doc confirmed that yes, what I'm feeling at night is my ovary twisting, and then it untwists when I get up in the morning. But because it hasn't stayed twisted yet, I'm SOL. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

On the plus side, I am so looking forward to opening the stack of cards from MeFi card club. I am extra super appreciative of card club right now!
posted by Ruki at 8:41 AM on May 17 [9 favorites]


Hugs to everyone that wants them.

My grandmother (almost 92) went into the hospital at the beginning of the month, and they found stage four colon cancer (we had suspicions, but no confirmation). She already has other health issues and kidney disease, and had a raging UTI which reflected itself in dementia symptoms. She was released a dew days later, but hasn't recovered very well this time, and now it looks like she simply won't. We think her kidneys have completely shut down, and have gone from palliative care coming on Monday to hospice coming tomorrow.

Luckily, although she feels pretty miserable right now (which may be helped by hospice and having some additional private care), her pain is manageable. (also, we are so very lucky that she has the funds for private care.)

I am lucky to have a job that is really understanding of the time I am missing right now, and that I'm not as focused as I could be. But I am so, so sad. I think she would have preferred passing in her sleep, or at least in her bed, surrounded by young firefighters. (The time the fire department came to assisted living to help her get up, she was so very pleased by how handsome they all were.) All I want to do is curl up and cry, and instead I'm getting funeral quotes and arranging hospice and coordinating care.
posted by needlegrrl at 12:35 PM on May 17 [5 favorites]


Gina Haspel has been confirmed director of the CIA. I need time to unpack why THAT is the straw that finally broke the camel's back, but I am utterly SEETHING.

I practice good self-care, and I know how to step away from the cycle when it's really starting to bother me. In my daily life, there's nearly nothing I can think of that frustrates me, annoys me, or upsets me. I am lucky- it is my PRIVILEGE to have that kind of detachment from the political reality of this country. Sure, I've had empathy for the people who are effected in the more direct ways, gone to the marches, etc., but this week with the precipitous and systemic slide into dehumanization and labeling of immigrants as animals has made this feel inexplicably but profoundly personal.

Anyway, Gina Haspel is an absolute fucking scum monster and she deserves anything everything that happens to her. Reader, I wish her ill.

Anyone up for seizing the Capitol building? Clearly, we're not doing rule of law anymore.
posted by Krazor at 2:09 PM on May 17 [3 favorites]


Just today my dad out of the blue texts my brothers and me a link to a QAnon youtube video. He's Typical Evangelical Republican Parent, but I hoped to never find him down that particular rabbit hole. Thankfully my Evangelical Republican Brothers and I teamed up to talk him down with soothing words about God's Plan. Who knows, though, once you start to buy into conspiracy theories (especially seductive ones like "Trump's not incompetent, he's working in secret to destroy the corrupt liberal sex trade!") it's hard to cash out again.

All in all, it's just another dose of the stress that prompted me to distance myself from my Typical Evangelical Republican Family.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 3:20 PM on May 17 [1 favorite]


I just got an email that a friend from grad school died of lung cancer yesterday. She was 49 and never smoked. What the fuck.
posted by mogget at 3:21 PM on May 17 [1 favorite]


Dhalia Lithwick, on the subject of How to Survive Trump’s Presidency Without Losing Your Mind, relates this parable by the 18th-century mystic Rabbi Nachman of Bratslav:
HARVEST OF MADNESS

There once was a king who was also an astrologer. By studying the stars he learned that the harvest of wheat that year would be tainted, and anyone who ate of it would go mad. The king revealed this prophecy to his friend, the prime minister, and asked if there was anything they could do. The prime minister said, “Let us set aside some of last year’s wheat. That way we will not have to eat the tainted grain.” The king thought about this for a while, and then he said, “It’s not possible to set aside enough of last year’s wheat for everyone. But if we alone eat the good wheat, we will be the only sane people in a mad world. All the others will look at us as if we were the ones who are mad. So, we will have to eat the tainted wheat. But let us place a mark on our foreheads to remind each other that we are mad, like everyone else.”
She glosses it for her audience:
The people who organize and vote and march and run for office, the people who track down and report news, the folks who file lawsuits and who hear those lawsuits—they all do it in a world that makes no internal coherent sense anymore. But they see the other marks on other people’s foreheads, and they forge ahead. And I salute you, fellow broccoli* people, and want to affirm that your marks are not as faint as they may seem. As long as we hang on to the marks and the memory and the promise, perhaps we can eat the wheat and not lose ourselves to it. The story holds fast so long as there are two people left to recognize each other. We eat the madness, as we may have to for a while longer, but we are not yet mad, and not yet alone.
* She refers to this tweet by author Karen T. Smith: "I want to scream at random people in the grocery store: How can you just be there, buying broccoli??? Can’t you see our representative democracy is on fire? And then I realize I need broccoli so I go and put some in my cart."
posted by Doktor Zed at 7:28 AM on May 18 [20 favorites]


A good friend was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia two weeks ago and is in the middle of a 5 (or more) week hospital stay as he receives chemotherapy. This is only the initial Phase 1 of treatment and the full treatment course will probably take several years with many stops, starts, real hope, false hope, setbacks, advancements, and pain.

He has an 80 - 90% chance of going into remission *at some point* during treatment, but the probability of actually being 'cured' is closer to 35 - 40%. He's young, and there's some newer drugs now to treat his specific cancer subtype, so that's something, and hopefully those percentages are actually higher than the older data would suggest.

He is also single with no immediate family. He was only a month into a new job when he got diagnosed, and while I think his job and benefits will be protected under ADA, I'm not positive. He's never been great with money and doesn't have much in savings; he was already a couple months behind in rent.

It all feels so precarious. He was fine and then he wasn't. His friends are helping out as we can, but my husband and I are worried for him.
posted by castlebravo at 9:36 AM on May 18 [2 favorites]


8 killed in texas school shooting while a maniac runs towards the school with a maga hat and a sidearm. What is this disease in us, this cancer. I'm so exhausted by our collective pathology.. fuck
posted by dis_integration at 9:43 AM on May 18 [6 favorites]


I'm just so tired.

I used to feel like things had some chance of getting better, or at least a little better? But nothing has panned out as hoped and it seems like things will merely go from pretty shitty to actively catastrophic for the entire rest of my life. I've gone back to hoping that's not a super long time.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 9:43 AM on May 18 [2 favorites]


three weeks until i can get back to work.

hugs to all of y’all. you lot are so much stronger than i am.
posted by dogheart at 11:52 AM on May 18 [1 favorite]


Today's shooting has me shook and stunned and just so sad. It's a different sad from after Parkland. After Parkland, we fucking rallied. I spoke at a rally with Rep. Clark in Lexington, helped organize March for our Lives in Boston, helped kids with organizing walks all around the Boston area and DC

AND IT'S ALL FOR FUCKING NOTHING.

I just had this deep and sudden epiphany that Americans don't care about dead kids. Millions of Americans marched and our president said nothing. Walkouts around the US; nothing. Americans don't care. It's nothing deep. It's just like our American disinterest in whatever happens in Antarctica, eh--who cares. We don't give a shit about dead kids and nothing will ever change. It's just going to be a thing like standardized tests. Some times kids take tests, sometimes they get shot.
posted by yes I said yes I will Yes at 2:30 PM on May 18 [9 favorites]


Today I was on a bus and children started chanting racial slurs in unison and I just want to go home and curl in a ball and cry. I know what to do when it’s adults but I don’t know what to do about children except get my heart broke.
posted by corb at 4:24 PM on May 18 [20 favorites]


Thank you for creating this thread.

I went to the psychiatry of my town's general hospital and the shrink prescribed something that I don't want to take. It's an antipsychotic and tricyclic antidepressant compound that in my opinion isn't worth the possible long-term adverse effects. (I'm not psychotic.) And it's on top of an SSRI antidepressant. The stuff is banned in my neighbouring countries but here it's prescribed like lollipops (sometimes by the gastrointestinal department for suspected "somatization", without referring the patient to psychiatry). I can't even find any studies of passable quality about the drug on PubMed.

I'm going to get a second opinion before putting any of that in my body. Then I'll have to drag myself around the town and endure a possibly hostile health system.

The more they treat me like a lab rat the more I say this: I am not my illness.

And neither are you. Hugs to all.
posted by runcifex at 10:30 PM on May 18 [5 favorites]


Corb, I am so sorry.
posted by daybeforetheday at 1:46 AM on May 19


Corb, shit, that's awful. I think we live in the same place, and I want to throw tomatoes at people who say it's just a safe "liberal bubble" here. Safe for whom. Ugh.

My job is in gun violence prevention, including running a program that encourages people to please fucking store their guns locked up so, say, their children don't take them to school and murder their classmates. As soon as news got out about this shooting and that the shooter was arrested alive, we looked at each other in the office and said, I'll bet it's a young white man, and I'll bet he used a family gun, and I'll bet I can tell you every talking point everyone will say to reporters now while studiously doing nothing about the problem. Yes on all counts. I'm tired.

I'm in the throes of a giant crush on a recently-reconnected old friend, which is not a great idea to bring up with her for Reasons, and last night we had dinner and drank a bunch of beer and talked about things other than death for a few hours. Wonderful and necessary. We've been having earnest conversations about how eating vegetables and making community are a key part of resisting this fucking shit we are in and I'm trying to take it to heart.
posted by centrifugal at 8:31 AM on May 19 [6 favorites]


Today I was on a bus and children started chanting racial slurs in unison and I just want to go home and curl in a ball and cry.

Corb, I’m so sorry that happened. FWIW, I try not to put too much significance into the actions of children. 2) Their brains aren’t fully formed. 2) They’re mouthpieces for the adults that raised them.

I’ll be honest, my friends and I did and said the shittiest things when young. I wish I could take back every one. My older brother said and did homophobic shit all the time, and I learned acceptable behavior from him. My bff’s grandmother was a racist woman, and he learned acceptable behavior from her. It took us both about 4 years of college to undo the bullshit our families instilled in us. (Honestly, this is, to me, the value of a college education. It gets you away from your family, if only for a few hours at a time, and hopefully undoes their bullshit.)

I love all the people out there saying how intrinsically “good” children are. Uhhh, no. They’re not. A child is just a sponge. They’re as awful as we let them be.
posted by greermahoney at 10:58 AM on May 19 [9 favorites]


Metafilter: They fucking SHINGLED over the fucking VENT HOLE.

I've been at a contract to hire gig for 2 weeks now and I've not really done anything. I mean I have a local environment set up and I'm evaluating code for a migration but there's no real management on what needs done. We have weekly progress meetings and I get the feeling that the client just wants things to work, without thinking at all about what that means. It's stressful as fuck to do next to nothing all day long, wondering what you're missing.
posted by 922257033c4a0f3cecdbd819a46d626999d1af4a at 7:22 PM on May 20 [2 favorites]


Figured out how to solve some of my personal issues. It involves a time machine, a safari outfit with a pith helmet, and a giant trout.
posted by ZeusHumms at 7:26 AM on May 21 [1 favorite]


If anyone needs a refresher course in what anti-semitism is and maybe the shit they shouldn't be saying out loud, here you go.

ZeusHumms, if you're selling trout to slap people with, I'm buyin'.
posted by zarq at 9:50 AM on May 21 [1 favorite]


My asshole neighbors apparently can't afford to have their trash picked up anymore and are letting bags of garbage pile up in the yard by our shared fence and it's attracting flies.
posted by elsietheeel at 12:48 PM on May 21


I was running 20 minutes late for an 8 AM mental health appointment through my university's health services, and when I called the front desk to let them know, they told me that I wouldn't be able to go to the appointment. They made me reschedule or cancel and fined me $25. Fucking bullshit. I had to wait more than a month for that appointment, a therapy appointment, and I was more than 15 minutes late, so they fucked me out of my time and money. Fuck them. I'm sure there's a problem with no-shows, but the solution is to actually fund your fucking health services so that appointments for basic mental health support aren't as competitive as admissions. Get fucked, [school name redacted].
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 1:51 AM on May 23 [4 favorites]


I'm afraid about the affluent angry white men who think that they're entitled to women and they're entitled to be racist and assemble, now, deliberately in my country. And I'm afraid about their angry white women who support them. And how it's so often veiled in this superficial politeness or even a phony supportive liberalism and doesn't genuinely understand or care who it hurts. I just want to go somewhere that I can be safe and I feel like there isn't any such place.
posted by windykites at 2:37 AM on May 23 [4 favorites]


Since we're apparently not allowed to criticize the Democratic party from the left in the main political threads any more, here's my deleted comment reposted here:

As a socialist, I look at the US's two viable political parties and I feel the way I imagine most citizens feel in authoritarian sham democracies like Russia, where their ruler allows token opposition that is never permitted to take power. I can vote for a radically capitalist party that is itching to send us all to hell as quickly as possible, or I can vote for a moderately capitalist party that seems to want to take the scenic route to hell instead. There's no electoral possibility for turning around and walking away from hell without either completely reforming the Democratic party or reforming the system to allow for viable third parties.
posted by One Second Before Awakening at 9:57 AM on May 23 [3 favorites]


Since we're apparently not allowed to criticize the Democratic party from the left in the main political threads any more, here's my deleted comment reposted here

I wish it were different but the 2016 primaries broke everyone's brains and that topic (criticising the Democratic party from left) quickly spirals out of control with recriminations and old grudges. It's about as caustic as talking about Israel these days. It's another thing that makes me mad at the world.
posted by dis_integration at 10:30 AM on May 23 [3 favorites]


It would not surprise me if the reason your comment was deleted was not that it criticized the Democratic Party but that you are depicting a hyperbolic doomsday scenario of sorts by saying they're sending us to hell.
posted by zarq at 10:54 AM on May 23 [6 favorites]


I mean, I've had at least a couple of comments deleted for that reason over the last few months.
posted by zarq at 10:55 AM on May 23 [1 favorite]


zarq: "It would not surprise me if the reason your comment was deleted was not that it criticized the Democratic Party but that you are depicting a hyperbolic doomsday scenario of sorts by saying they're sending us to hell."

Yeah, there's definitely a doom-censorship bias here. Not surprising that people don't believe we can't have 1930s Germany when we can't actually talk about the actual direction of the country because it's ~~too depressing~~.
posted by TypographicalError at 12:00 PM on May 23 [3 favorites]


or that we're not really seeing echoes of nazi germany because we "need a sense of perspective"
posted by anem0ne at 12:53 PM on May 23 [1 favorite]


Also the idea that we absolutely must keep calm and maintain each others' sense of complacency or else we'll fall into despair, which might make us complacent.
posted by One Second Before Awakening at 1:12 PM on May 23 [1 favorite]


KEEP FIGHTING. KEEP RESISTING. YOU ARE THAT WHICH IS GOOD WITH THE WORLD.

If you need a cause or reason, do it for ACA and universal healthcare and GLTBQ rights. Do it for me and trans people everywhere and yet to be. Do it for me, who gets to feel what it feels like to feel functional, normal and even happy for the first time in their life after forty years thanks to ACA and all of your efforts fighting for what's right.

Thank you so much. All of you, anyone who has picked up the phone. Anyone who has voted their conscience and done their homework. Anyone who has spoken up, or tried to make things gentler, or accepted those that were different and struggling.

YOUR RESISTANCE AND EFFORTS MATTER. YOUR FATIGUE IS REAL, AND IT IS SHARED BY MANY.

NEVER FORGET THE GOAL OF PEACE, HEALTH AND PLENTY FOR ALL. IT IS A WORTHY ONE.
posted by loquacious at 2:13 PM on May 23 [8 favorites]


so my partner's pending green card application can no longer be found on the USCIS website? it appears to have straight-up evaporated somehow? the other case numbers (for work visa, for travel document) which were previously completed are all there. but the case number for the I-130 just brings up an error message telling us to call them, except it's after business hours so we can't call them.

so that's fun and also exciting
posted by halation at 2:38 PM on May 23 [3 favorites]


I haven’t read any of this thread because I just had to come here because it feels like in the last week things have gone bad, fast, and I’m scared. Trump wanted to start fighting back and his instincts were right, it’s working. He’s getting his investigation. Nunes is getting briefed separately. I’m just scared.
posted by Brainy at 6:27 AM on May 24 [4 favorites]


It sounds like Morgan Freeman might have just gotten MeToo'd.
posted by paper chromatographologist at 10:52 AM on May 24


Honestly, I’m pretty sure 75% of men over the age of 50 will. This doesn’t mean I want it to stop.
posted by corb at 11:19 AM on May 24 [4 favorites]


i’m scared

and i just got the call that my sister is dead and i have to go back to virginia for the funeral

i still have the job in illinois and my boss from hillary was the first person i called when i got off the phone with my mom

i just. jesus.
posted by dogheart at 2:56 PM on May 24 [11 favorites]




END! END! END! END!

(dogheart, my condolences)
posted by angrycat at 3:23 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


dogheart, my condolences, my comment was not in response to yours which I had not read
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 3:27 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


Condolences, dogheart
posted by nubs at 3:30 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


Oh no. Deepest condolences, dogheart.
posted by zarq at 3:48 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


I am so so sorry dogheart for your loss.
posted by corb at 4:11 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


Shit, I'm sorry, dogheart.
posted by anem0ne at 4:35 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


Condolences, dogheart. Hang in there.
posted by petebest at 6:22 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


(((dogheart)))
posted by runcifex at 8:03 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


So sorry, dogheart.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 8:54 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


oh dogheart, I am so, so sorry.
posted by lalex at 9:49 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


i’m okay. my families have always been good— and by that i mean both my metafilter family and my political family. the blood family is a little iffy, but honestly? my sister was the cause of much of the unrest. so maybe it’ll settle now.

my mom was the one that found her. and i told her that, y’know, the internet was sending its love.

she wanted me to tell you thank you.
posted by dogheart at 9:53 PM on May 24 [6 favorites]


oh i hit the contact form immediately after i hit post on that one. i think it was my first deleted comment, actually, but by god i earned it
posted by dogheart at 10:36 PM on May 24 [1 favorite]


So sorry dogheart that is fucking rough 🙁
posted by supercrayon at 1:47 AM on May 25 [1 favorite]


So very sorry, dogheart.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane (staff) at 1:49 AM on May 25 [1 favorite]


My already-poor mental health has disintegrated since the Las Vegas' shooter's motives were released. He sounds exactly like my parents, and it's been too long (over two years) since I've been convinced that they wouldn't harm myself or my family. (Alas, they know where I live and they believe I'm indoctrinating their granddaughter.)

Combine that with yesterday's embarrassing withdrawal from the DPRK talks and the the 1500 or so children that our government has somehow "lost" and I started looking at various immigration websites (such as Canada's Immigration and Citizenship) to see what my (and my family's) options are.

Turns out nobody wants us.

I can't say I blame them, but... well, I was taught growing up that God punishes the children for their parents' sins even to the third or fourth generation and while I don't share that faith any more, I'm spending a lot of time meditating on that and the nature of self-fulfilling prophesies. I have no future, and my poor daughter has no future, and it's neither of our fault, and I'm struggling with it.

Thank you for existing, Metafilter. My condolences, dogheart.
posted by ragtag at 8:01 AM on May 25 [5 favorites]


dogheart, I'm so sorry. Please accept my condolences.
posted by holborne at 8:18 AM on May 25 [1 favorite]


((((dogheart))))
posted by Splunge at 1:56 PM on May 25 [1 favorite]


I'm so sorry, dogheart. Sending love
posted by Fig at 7:16 PM on May 25 [1 favorite]


Love to all of you.
posted by dog food sugar at 1:47 PM on May 26 [1 favorite]


I'm sorry for your loss, dogheart.

I tried to go work on my patio but my asshole neighbors have friends over and they're all standing around in their garage chatting loudly and calling each other "n---a". And every last one of them is white.
posted by elsietheeel at 11:51 AM on May 27 [2 favorites]


This just in: Ice cream and cake are reportedly easily obtainable and relatively inexpensive. Officials say that ice cream and cake futures are holding strong, with surging interest in chocolate and cookie-based flavors. The head of Ameripeople For Like Chocolate Man, Trisha Humdinger, says that talks with "cool, freaky people" continue to promote Milk Chocolate as a responsible alternative to Too Much Cacao. As of press time a spokesperson for the cool freaks smiled broadly and gave a "hang loose" gesture.

We'll keep on this story and bring you all the updates and highlights as events warrant.
posted by petebest at 4:57 AM on May 31 [2 favorites]


[ holds head, screams ]

It's like a fireworks factory explosion when the fire's just starting to get into the underground bunkers, and you don't know what's going to blow up next. OMG
posted by seanmpuckett at 7:51 AM on May 31


My sibling literally just got their first welding job after spending the last several months in welding school, after spending the previous two years living with me because our father is a homophobic asshole. I'm supposed to be excited for them. But now, Donald Trump's personal decision to enact steel tariffs is threatening to wreck the future my sibling has worked so hard for.

There is no one in my life that I love more than my sibling. I take it very fucking personally when someone harms them.
posted by J.K. Seazer at 3:39 PM on May 31 [2 favorites]


So calling Ivanka (and only Ivanka) a cunt is this unforgiveable thing but saying you're going to have some fun while meeting the parents of school-shooting victims is perfectly okay. Completely and utterly ignoring the massive blow-out in deaths arising from the Puerto Rico hurricane is just what happens. Calling Pelosi a 'MS-13 lover' which is the most transparent dog whistle I've heard in decades is tickedy-boo. The White House calling for a tv show to be cancelled isn't an outrageous abuse of power and we should all be nodding our heads in agreement with this amazing display of but-what-aboutism. Jesus fucking wept.
posted by h00py at 5:11 PM on May 31 [5 favorites]


HELLO I AM SO JUSTIFIABLY ANGRY THAT I AM EXHAUSTED FROM ADRENALINE.

Hell, I even had a little cry after I got home because that's a thing I can do now, apparently, and I'm feeling much better.

So I didn't make it a month at my new job before having to trespass a fucking creeper, creeping on one of my minor-aged volunteers. Missed it by a couple of days.

I've been observing this person for a couple of days due to reports. Already had personal issues with them.

And I had to go through the thing where they didn't want to speak up and I watched these two brave, kick ass young women go through the whole uncertainty and doubt and worry about being taken seriously, and I was there and took them VERY SERIOUSLY because I was already watching this guy.

I can't really talk about it but I did the thing I do when I'm SUPER JUSTIFIABLY ANGRY AND PROTECTIVE and I get really loud, clear, concise and my diction goes from mushy to action movie preview voiceover and I make a lot of scary, meaningful and direct eye contact and read someone the riot act.

Later much after as I was gathering information I learned that the friend of the volunteer was the goddaughter of a friend, and the daughter of another friend I know. I didn't recognize her because I only met her briefly like 2 years ago.

THEN I GOT ANGRY AND ANGRIER ALL OVER AGAIN (I mean, y'know, inside, and in my eloquent verbal expressions) AND I HAD TO GO FOR A FUCKING WALK AND GET SOME NICOTINE VAPOR IN MY FACE HOLES AND STUFF AND WHO DO I SEE BUT THE FUCKING CREEPER WALKING BACK UP THE ROAD AS I CAN SEE HIM THROUGH AN ALLEY FROM WHERE I TAKE BREAKS.

So I track him from one street over. Watch him cross towards the venue. I'm standing right frickin' there just down the sidewalk from the corner and staring at him and he's oblivious. So I fall in right behind him as he's going for the door to re-enter and as soon as one foot is inside "SIR. YOU ARE NOW TRESPASSING." right behind them and they go to pieces about how they're just getting the battery they left behind and I'm not having it and I read him the riot act again.

And so while I've generally cared about the youth involved in this gig even when I was a volunteer, my view today went from a mild (but y'know, concerned/caring) "hey, you might be trouble because I sure the fuck was" to "Holy shit, you guys are actually vulnerable as fuck." So, from gently wary to actively protective and super engaged and on the lookout.

I'm super pissed about this because this particular volunteer has been really awesome. Damnit, at that age I'd be bitching so much about the hard work, and she keeps signing up for all-day shifts.

So.. in a real sense I'm going to have the opportunity to do some good.

I also am now (as I'm typing this) realizing I have an opportunity to try to teach a lot of young women to shout "WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK ARE YOU DOING, DUDE? WHAT ARE YOU EXACTLY ASKING BY ASKING WHAT TIME DO I GET OFF OF WORK? YOU GONNA FUCKING STALK ME? ASK ME OUT? I'M TRAPPED BEHIND THE COUNTER HERE MAKING YOU COFFEE YOU ABUSIVELY CLUELESS ASSHOLE, GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE."

Or at least to think it and know it and trust their gut and act on it and speak up early and often. I can do that.

And I can take them seriously and try to look out for them.

I mentioned this before but the major risk to this job is heartbreak in super real ways. I'm fine and ok, but could totally use a hug.
posted by loquacious at 9:40 PM on May 31 [11 favorites]


(((((loquacious)))))
posted by hanov3r at 10:27 PM on May 31


can we just have a new rule across the site?

if you can't understand how korean names go, i.e., it's the "kim family", not the "un family", you shouldn't be able to fucking say a single fucking thing about the situation in korea
posted by anem0ne at 1:29 PM on June 1 [2 favorites]


Alternatively, since people still don't seem to get it, can we just agree to do the Olympic thing for Asian names and just capitalize the entire surname?

Amazing actor BAE Doona.
Pres. MOON Jae-in.
Fmr. UN Secretary-General Ban-ki MOON.
Fucking Dickhead KIM Jong Un.
Very Attractive Man Daniel Dae KIM.
Also Very Attractive Man Daniel HENNEY.
posted by anem0ne at 1:33 PM on June 1 [2 favorites]


Can we please discourage the use of 'signatures' in comments? Aren't we trying to keep noise levels down in politics threads?

It's getting really annoying.
posted by zarq at 2:28 PM on June 1 [2 favorites]


I wound up on this farm because of a lot of tumult in my life over last five years. It's a real tale of woe, but the details aren't important. All that matters is that I was out over the edge and then the emergency of the election made that even more tenuous. So I wound up here at the animal sanctuary. Over the course of the next few months, the people here helped me as best they could, but I was too hurt and too scared and spent a lot of time wishing I were dead.

I was terrified of the horses when I got here. One time, when I was just visiting a year or so before I moved in, the herd got out while I was the only one on property. After calling people who knew what to do, I tried to walk up the driveway to the gate and close it. The horses charged me such that I had to jump out of the way. At which point I got told to just go back in the house. Then then horses were out in the road. A sheriff's deputy came and I had to ask him to round them up because I didn't know what to do. There was another embarrassing time when I was in the paddock with River, the biggest horse in the herd, and was so frightened while the older ladies I was working with just pushed him around without thinking about it.

Thus, animal care wasn't one of my chores, but out-of-town jobs followed by a family emergency among those that were responsible for it thrust that duty on me early last year. That meant that, in addition to feeding the cat and ducks, I needed to get out, feed, and put away a couple of the rescue horses.

One of these horses, Cam, was one of the original herd here. He had been rescued by my business partner's mother who founded the farm. He was old when he got here, so he was positively ancient by the time I met him.

I was very timid with them at first. I learned the hard way on so much of it, e.g., don't wait until they've finished their food before putting a halter on because when you go to catch them later it will be much harder. I had to make the other horses listen to me and clear the gate so I could put them away. Plus, I was in a lot of emotional pain and here by myself a lot because the others were away doing what they had to do. When it was cold or raining or I was having a hard day emotionally I wouldn't want to go out, but Cam needed me, so I would make it somehow.

Little by little, as I cared for the horses, I started to feel better. I've said it before, but there's an old aphorism that, "The best thing for the inside of a person is the outside of a horse," and in my case it was true. Cam became my first horse friend in my life. While I was feeding him I would pet him. Brush him. Talk to him. He would be stubborn and willful and would clean his face on the back of my shirt. The ladies would get mad at him because when he would rub on them like that it would knock them down, but I'm big enough that I could just push back and so I would laugh when he did it. Over the course of the winter and spring I became close to him and in return he healed me.

At the vet day at the end of last spring the vet said it might be time to let him go. He was having trouble maintaining weight even with getting extra food. He was still spry though, even though his feet weren't in great shape, and the people in charge knew I needed him, so we said we'd see how summer went.

I redoubled my efforts. We had a glorious summer, and the pastures were lush and green after having been withered by a terrible drought the previous year. He put on weight, his feet improved, and he looked good. He improved so much and the fodder was so good that we didn't have to feed him every day like we used to.

Over the course of the year I also became a better horseperson. I'm not afraid at all to just walk out into the pasture with the herd now. I have a way with them and can calm a nervous horse most of the time. A month or so ago, I got complimented by one of the ladies I had embarrassed myself in front of last year.

Six weeks or so ago, Cam was wandering in the chapel pasture after he had been fed and left to get some extra grass away from the herd. He'd gone all the way to the far gate, so I let him in there. River charged up to investigate with his compadres. After I turned the golf cart around, they all ran beside me as I drove along the fence. Including Cam. Galloping. Flat out running. Mane flowing in the wind and tail straight out behind him. I was so happy to see my old man being able to act like a horse despite his age and his feet.

A couple of days ago Cam got brought into the paddock to be a friend for some horses who were in there to go on a diet. Yesterday morning, I woke up to news he wasn't walking right. By the time I got out there, he had tried to get back to the herd on the other side of the lake, but didn't make it and was laying in the grass on the bridge. I went up and knelt beside him, but I don't think he knew me. He got to his feet because he was thirsty, but he couldn't walk straight. He drank from the lake, and I worried he would fall in. So I leaned on him and begged him to turn the other way. After he had drank for a while, we led him by fits and starts out into the nearby summer pasture.

We got a halter on him when he tried heading back towards the lake. So I ran to the tack room and brought a bowl out, filled it with water from the hydrant, and offered it to him. I held it while he drank, hardly able to keep his feet. I was glad that I got to care for him one last time. I went to get a refill, but before I got back to the hydrant the vet arrived.

Cam went peacefully and without struggle or distress. We buried him right there with flowers and an offering of tobacco. We'll plant a tree there if it ever stops raining.

If I could let myself, I would cry for a long, long time, but there's too much to do right now to let my emotions get the best of me. I just wanted y'all to know that Cam was a good horse, and he saved me.
posted by ob1quixote at 3:06 PM on June 1 [15 favorites]


BAN Ki-Moon, but please feel free to keep commenting in stories about Korea.
posted by Etrigan at 3:25 PM on June 1


You're completely right.

I'd assumed he'd flipped his name around like Syngman RHEE.
posted by anem0ne at 4:50 PM on June 1


Maybe not, because I recall referring to him as BAN a few times. Obviously my brian is getting frizzld from all of this ducking duck
posted by anem0ne at 4:53 PM on June 1


Can we please discourage the use of 'signatures' in comments? Aren't we trying to keep noise levels down in politics threads?

I was going to make a Todd Lokken joke but that reference is so ancient by now that just thinking about it made me feel old.
posted by octothorpe at 7:43 PM on June 1 [2 favorites]


Wonderful story, ob1quixote.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 9:50 PM on June 1 [1 favorite]


Fucking FUCK. There's a new catch-all thread and I've fallen into it and I do NOT have the emotional stability to fucking do this any more. How do I not follow that thread?
posted by hanov3r at 4:37 PM on June 4




hanov3r , if you or anyone else would like to make a pact with me to step away from the POTUS thread for a bit (either for a week or until the next POTUS thread), I'm game. I need to step away from time to time and it really does help.
posted by mochapickle at 9:28 PM on June 4 [4 favorites]


mochapickle, not only will I take you up on that, I will probably want to renew it when the next POTUS thread rolls up. How do you want to play this? :)
posted by hanov3r at 7:31 AM on June 5


Yay! I'm in for this round. It gets easier once it drops off the front page. I'm dropping it from my recent activity, and anytime I get the urge to look, I'm gonna go walk my dog. If I do end up looking, I'll send you a mea culpa memail to confess and you can chide me. If I make it to the next POTUS thread without looking, I'll go get an ice cream.
posted by mochapickle at 9:09 AM on June 5


Update: Police report filed, contacts made. Creeper arrested.
posted by loquacious at 9:49 AM on June 5 [7 favorites]


aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
posted by infini at 9:51 AM on June 5


I'll come back and attempt a more coherent version of the incoherent rant
posted by infini at 9:53 AM on June 5 [2 favorites]


Luckily, it looks like my comment on the most recent POTUS thread got pulled (I have a tendency to snarky-riff), so the thread's not in my current activity any more. mochapickle, if I fall off the wagon and open the thread, you'll get ashamed MeMail.

My personal reward for not re-opening the thread until the next one rolls around will be a new chain mail bracelet kit.
posted by hanov3r at 11:25 AM on June 5 [1 favorite]


Deal. :)
posted by mochapickle at 11:39 AM on June 5


Luckily, it looks like my comment on the most recent POTUS thread got pulled

I'm sure you're aware of this but just in case this is helpful to anyone, you can remove any post from your recent activity in one of two ways:

1) In the desktop interface, go to the Recent Activity page and click the (remove from activity) link on the left column underneath the text of each post. (that link does not show up in the mobile stylesheet.)
or
2) Open the post and on the "posted by ____ (___ comments total)" line, you'll see: [remove from activity] [add to favorites] ___ users marked this as a favorite [!] Just click on the [remove from activity] link.

There is also a Manage Posts Removed from Recent Activity page.
posted by zarq at 1:15 PM on June 5 [1 favorite]


More TV parallels from the TV administration. After today's stunt replacing the Eagles' visit, it's clear we're dealing with Evil Michael Scott. Specifically, the most pitiful insight into his character.

His mind palace is an abyss, but there has to be a bottom, right?
posted by Johann Georg Faust at 2:12 PM on June 5 [1 favorite]


Last night when exiting the house I surprised a skunk on the porch. The beast was perched at a height such that when I opened the front door I was faced with its alarmed anus at eye level, about two arms' lengths away, pointed right at me. In absolute terror I slammed shut the door just as the skunk simultaneously sprayed and fled, thereby misting the entire porch. Fresh and proximate skunk spray smell is not like roadkill skunk smell or distant skunk smell. It's a hot and spicy smell. It's bad.

In addition there's been a new cat around and it got into a bad fight with one of the old ones and they bit each other in the face and shit, and so now I've quarantined them in separate rooms to await the inevitable abscesses. The other cats know something's up and they're being territorial assholes and pissing all over the house. So it's cat piss reek inside, skunk ass stink outside.

Also I still think that my Republican neighbors will eventually murder me for political reasons but it'll probably be in like 10 years when their kids are old enough to join paramilitaries. That about sums it up.
posted by Rust Moranis at 8:35 PM on June 5 [6 favorites]


Hello from sunny Parkland Florida, where our Tuesday morning was filled with the anxiety-inducing sounds of sirens and news helicopters. Looks like somebody SWATted shooting survivor/activist David Hogg and his family. Fortunately, David and his family weren't home... and as far as I know, nobody was injured collaterally (lots of accidents happen around emergency vehicle response).

But two schools were locked down, and the neighbors were all freaked out, and I'm flashing back to Feb 14 and I wasn't even AT the school; can't imagine what this did to the psyches of all those kids, parents, first responders, etc. David's calling it a prank meant to divert attention from the get-out-the-vote attempt. I get it. He's not feeding the trolls. But make no mistake, this incident was traumatic for our town. People were harmed by the malicious person(s) who did this. I hope the perpetrator(s) are caught, and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.
posted by Nancy_LockIsLit_Palmer at 1:59 AM on June 6 [8 favorites]


I fucking hate fucking stupid fucking open fucking primaries.
posted by elsietheeel at 6:12 AM on June 6 [2 favorites]


So, I just had an email exchange with a constituent representative for a congress person, and they ended with "have a blessed day" - to which I really wanted to reply "Thanks! May Thor's blessings shine upon you, too, on this, Thor's Day."

But I didn't, because I'm at work, and I believe in the separation of church and state, thank you very fucking much.
posted by filthy light thief at 9:31 AM on June 7 [6 favorites]


The teaching of this rhyme:

Lockdown, lockdown, lock the door
Shut the lights off, say no more
Go behind the desk and hide
Wait until it's safe inside
Lockdown, lockdown, it's all done
Now it's time to have some fun!

fills me with the deepest sadness, despair, and rage. This is fucked. It is a horror.
posted by Jpfed at 10:31 AM on June 7 [8 favorites]


My kids were told in kindergarten that lockdowns happen so they can be ready in case someone has come into the school that wasn't supposed to. They explained to me that during a drill they stay in their classrooms with the lights off, shades drawn and the doors locked. The teachers make them be very quiet until the lockdown is over. They also learned a similar nursery rhyme.

I asked my kids if they understood why they were doing all those things.

"So the bad person won't steal us."
posted by zarq at 10:58 AM on June 7 [7 favorites]


ohmygod
posted by mochapickle at 12:47 PM on June 7 [2 favorites]


Now it's time to have some fun!

Dark echoes of 45's own words when he met with Santa Fe victims' families last week.
posted by Strange Interlude at 1:30 PM on June 7 [1 favorite]


I don't know where else to share this, so here goes: I read news from Japan sometimes for practice, and in the headlines, where we would use the phrase "top officials", the Japanese newspapers instead use the word "top."

As in, "Tops from USA and North Korea set to meet on an island in Singapore."

They keep putting Donald Trump's face next to the words "top from USA" and it makes me laugh and cry simultaneously
posted by Rainbo Vagrant at 2:10 PM on June 8 [6 favorites]


He's the top something, alright. I have an effectively indepletable supply of possibilities at the ready.
posted by snuffleupagus at 11:29 AM on June 9


The supposedly progressive company I worked for just illegally locked out the union, so I’m pretty pissed right now.
posted by corb at 3:19 PM on June 9 [3 favorites]


Its hard to believe that Prince is one year older than Vice President Pence.
posted by ZeusHumms at 4:25 PM on June 9


guys

i just read the megathread about NK and the supreme court to get caught up and now I think I'm gonna take a boxing class

i love you
posted by knownassociate at 11:13 AM on June 12 [2 favorites]


Minor typo on the sidebar:

US Politics

Recent #potus45 threads:
Tump/Kim Singapore Meet
posted by zarq at 9:46 AM on June 13


Amusingly enough, it's a word.
posted by zarq at 9:48 AM on June 13


Once upon a time this would have been a big fucking deal but apparently the Tr*mp and K*m show is what's important for at least the next two days or so, but I'm not going to forget some fucking deadshit representing the USA government calling the members of the G7 'lesser countries'. How fucking dare you?
posted by h00py at 9:57 AM on June 13


Fuck, we're going to need a new fucking thread by fucking Friday.

But fuck me, I'm exhausted and despairing.
posted by Doktor Zed at 7:30 PM on June 13 [1 favorite]


After seeing Sessions' statement today I wished one could still send telegrams because I need a guy in a little hat to personally hand him my message of, "Fuck you. Get back underneath the Misty Mountains where you belong."
posted by ob1quixote at 1:42 PM on June 14 [2 favorites]


I am 39 years old. I cannot say the word fuck in front of my mother. She says it in front of me, Kid Ruki and I use it constantly around each other, but it's a weird hang up I have.

I was on the phone with my mom today and I was telling her about Trump getting sued. She brought up the Clinton Foundation. I snapped. "Maybe the fucking Clintons are corrupt. I don't fucking know. We've got bigger fucking things to worry about. You know how I can't say fuck in front of you? Well, fuck fuck fuckity fuck!"

There was a pause. I'm sitting at a stop light, wild-eyed and slightly out of breath. Then my mom burst out laughing and asked if I felt better.

I did, actually.

It was liking living this thread in real life.

Of course, by the time I got home, the conversation had moved on from politics and I had apologized to my mom for dropping so many F-bombs. I relayed the conversation to Kid Ruki when I got inside and her reaction was basically OMG ma, you should go lie down. So I did.
posted by Ruki at 4:30 PM on June 14 [1 favorite]


ob1quixote -

I'm little and I can find a hat. How much are you paying?
posted by Space Kitty at 4:35 PM on June 14 [1 favorite]


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