Self-link, it seems March 25, 2005 8:38 AM   Subscribe

Self-link, it seems
posted by John Kenneth Fisher to Etiquette/Policy at 8:38 AM (73 comments total)

Tattletale.
posted by item at 8:42 AM on March 25, 2005


It seems? It seem?! *puffs up* BWAHALAGAexplode
posted by Baby_Balrog at 8:43 AM on March 25, 2005


It seems like (if in fact self-link) that he may have been planning this all along. He registered on the 17th. Granted he could have posted this yesterday, but Friday probably is the day that more people are probably checking in.
posted by mic stand at 8:44 AM on March 25, 2005


Banned, and spanked.
posted by orange swan at 8:45 AM on March 25, 2005


tattletale

eh, I bitch enough about the admins when I think they've done wrong, I better do it when the users do too ;-)

also,k i wrote 'it seems' cause I took the words of others in that thread, w/o being Poirot myself, and I've seen people get accused of it and have it turn out not to be true.
posted by John Kenneth Fisher at 8:46 AM on March 25, 2005


$5 for how many guaranteed hits-- I guess about 5,000? If it lasts 3 hours? People in SEO or ads, is that a bad deal? I wonder if we'll see more of this (if it was in fact done on purpose, which my guess it it was...)
posted by neustile at 8:48 AM on March 25, 2005


How much is 5000 worth in ad revenue though, a couple dimes? Unless this is something that they do in their spare time and they enjoy getting a hundred hits a day, this site will be closed within a few months. That is unless they start posting porn on the site like College Humor.

I can guarantee that we'll see more of these types of posts as we have over the last couple months. We just had one last week for truffles.
posted by Arch Stanton at 8:53 AM on March 25, 2005


I think you guys have way to little going on in your lives

If I posted a CNN link, would you be accusing me of owning that too? Internet gustapo's you are not.
posted by drunk7daysaweek at 8:57 AM on March 25, 2005


ah. so Jason Ritledge abuses our tolerance and breaks the rules just to get more hits? that makes Jason Ritledge a bit of an arsehole doesn't it? if i were going to employ Jason Ritledge i'd be worried about this. doesn't seem like Jason Ritledge is a very trustworthy person. if i were doing a web search on the personal character of Jason Ritledge i'd be worried about this. i wonder if Jason Ritledge has a criminal record? he's certainly not liked around here. Jason Ritledge has stolen links from us. Jason Ritledge has lied to us. Jason Ritledge has broken our community's rules.
posted by andrew cooke at 8:58 AM on March 25, 2005


Crucify him.

/good friday
posted by sciurus at 9:01 AM on March 25, 2005


Well, it was a somewhat entertaning trainwreak.
posted by delmoi at 9:02 AM on March 25, 2005


Internet gustapo's you are not.

Grammar & spelling whiz you are not.
posted by item at 9:04 AM on March 25, 2005


Dude....

But I guess i'm not one of the internets gustapo's, so who am I to think this is all very lame. I am going to craft myself a very funny internet funny-news sight to fill up all the empty space in my life.
posted by tpl1212 at 9:04 AM on March 25, 2005


I hear Jason Ritledge (and Jason Rutledge) hates kittens and puppies.

I also hear that he hates to get Google Bombed.

I think anyone looking for him should know he's a self-linking criminal.
posted by bshort at 9:05 AM on March 25, 2005


actually, Jason Ritledge is a guitarist, and no it is not a self link.

He's a guitarist who also happens to link to greenrabbit. Strange, eh?
posted by dhoyt at 9:06 AM on March 25, 2005


/gustapo
posted by dhoyt at 9:07 AM on March 25, 2005


I think you guys have way to little going on in your lives

This from someone who posts a single link to a horribly executed web page with crap-all for content. FUBAR, SNAFU, etc.
posted by loquacious at 9:07 AM on March 25, 2005


I think you guys have way to little going on in your lives.

Maybe we have so much going on in our lives that a little break from our busy reality is visiting websites for some personal time to read and reflect.

I can't speak for anyone else but I work full-time, am earning my master's, have a 4-year old and have a baby on the way, for starters.

It's nice to come here and read interesting links. Personally, I don't really care that people thought the link sucked, it will be deleted. I've had really bad links deleted. Personally, if it was self-link, which you claim it wasn't, you will be banned. I didn't write the rules, I just like many of the people here and their witty commentary.
posted by mic stand at 9:10 AM on March 25, 2005


Drunk7daysaweek, if you had bothered to so much as read and comprehend the instructions about the posting form you would have seen that self-posting results in a deletion of the post and banning for you. So, bye. But if you want to come back as drunk6daysaweek and only post on that oh-so-crucial sober day, you'll probably be welcome. Or at least tolerated.
posted by orange swan at 9:13 AM on March 25, 2005


It is almost always the case when something that no one would ever find funny/good/interesting/whatever is linked here that it's a self-link. This one seems to be no exception. I love the denial too, "he's a guitarist". Oh, well in that case. WTF?
posted by chaz at 9:14 AM on March 25, 2005


I got "personally" happy just a second ago.
posted by mic stand at 9:14 AM on March 25, 2005


thats what you think
posted by puke & cry at 9:15 AM on March 25, 2005


Mic stand, is that maybe TMI?

;-)
posted by orange swan at 9:21 AM on March 25, 2005


All this margarine talk...making me horny hungry.
posted by mic stand at 9:25 AM on March 25, 2005


Drunk7daysaweek, please go away. Face it, you're busted. I now have a bad taste in my brain from this whole thing. Bleagh. Ptooie.
Oh look, someones posted a Friday Flash! yum.
posted by JAHxman at 9:26 AM on March 25, 2005


The self-link question obscures the fact that this is a crap-post beyond crap. People are comparing it to the Onion - no, folks, the Onion may be tired, but at least there's some craft there, some satire of newswriting. This sub-Fark sewage reads as though a sixth-grader wrote it. It's about as funny as the username "drunk7daysaweek."
posted by soyjoy at 9:29 AM on March 25, 2005


It's gone now, with the one-word eloquent explanation: "lame."
posted by pmurray63 at 9:32 AM on March 25, 2005


I was gonna say that drunk7daysaweek has really big balls self-linking and denying, then I found out it was not just the balls. ;)
posted by dabitch at 9:38 AM on March 25, 2005


Baby Balrog-

It didn't seem too many people disliked your post. You even got a few compliments. Quonsar wasn't impressed, but that's not shocking. It's not like this place is regulated by WWQD.


posted by mic stand at 9:18 AM PST on March 25

It's not?

Q: Someone dropped their wallet, and it's full of cash. There's a driver's license with an address on it. WWQD?

Quonsar would take the cash, eat the wallet, and rush off to the nearest fishmarket to buy as much live bait squid as he can. He would take the live squid back to where he found the wallet, arrange it in obscenely suggestive ways, and then vomit the half-digested wallet atop it all. He would then recite "I'm a little tea-pot" in a voice fit for a Swedish Deathmetal band and then traumatically frighten the nearest toddler or infant with his impressions of David Cassidy on an acid and ether binge, finishing off by calmly eating a pocket calculator while muttering the digits of Pi, backwards.
posted by loquacious at 9:38 AM on March 25, 2005


(Just so those who came in late aren't confused, that's from the deleted thread, not this one. I forgot to link it.)
posted by loquacious at 9:45 AM on March 25, 2005


So what's the story, now? This Jason Ritledge guy got caught masturbating with butter in a grocery store after being drunk for a week, or something? We have the funnest members! (Greasy, slippery, hazmat-cleanup-on-aisle-6 members, but fun!!!)
posted by taz at 9:47 AM on March 25, 2005


with the one-word eloquent explanation: "lame."

I would have used: "limp". ;-P
posted by mischief at 9:49 AM on March 25, 2005


Gee, and I thought you were mispelling "Gustavo."
posted by breezeway at 9:51 AM on March 25, 2005


I logged in for the first time in around 3 years just to be an asshole to that guy but the thread was closed too quickly :(
posted by jbeaumont at 10:05 AM on March 25, 2005


This site has to knock Canada's reputation for comedy down at least two notches.
posted by Arch Stanton at 10:07 AM on March 25, 2005


It was a noble goal, though, jbeaumont.
posted by taz at 10:13 AM on March 25, 2005


Thinking about the post, what bugs me the most is that it's about a Nebraska teen that uses margarine to masterbate. Everyone knows that if you're going to make that joke, it has to be a Wisconsin teen. That state is full of people like that.
posted by Arch Stanton at 10:19 AM on March 25, 2005


ok, maybe this should be askme, but why does anyone need lube? is this a special requirement for those brothers who have been, ahem, meddled with? or am i missing out on something?
posted by andrew cooke at 10:30 AM on March 25, 2005


You're right, Arch Stanton. Nebraskans are Cornhuskers.
posted by taz at 10:31 AM on March 25, 2005


Yes, it is a requirement. You unsanctified heathen.
posted by loquacious at 10:32 AM on March 25, 2005


why does anyone need lube?

Not need as such, but can feel nicer. Particularly if one likes to be rough with it.

Internet, stop making me say this stuff in public.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 10:35 AM on March 25, 2005


Thanks, loquacious, for the WWQD? description. It made me giggle.
posted by Specklet at 10:46 AM on March 25, 2005


why does anyone need lube?

Because you don't want it to look like it jumped out of a moving car.
posted by schyler523 at 10:48 AM on March 25, 2005


I can agree with this.
posted by rocketman at 11:05 AM on March 25, 2005


Looks like the guy joins bulletin boards to spam them for his site:

One, Two, Three, Four.

Lists greenrabbit as his homepage somewhere else

I made you a new tattoo. Have this added to your six-pack abs:


posted by mathowie (staff) at 11:09 AM on March 25, 2005


Internet gustapo's you are not.

Mmm... internet gazpacho... /Homer

on preview: AWESOME, Matt!
posted by scody at 11:12 AM on March 25, 2005


Ooo isn't he so dreamy and take-charge when he's banning someone?

*sigh*
posted by iconomy at 11:15 AM on March 25, 2005


Just 'cause he's banned doesn't mean we have to stop talking shit on him, right?
posted by item at 11:22 AM on March 25, 2005


Ban me! Ban me!
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 11:25 AM on March 25, 2005


Brilliant.
posted by sugarfish at 11:32 AM on March 25, 2005


it has to be a Wisconsin teen

Arch, from my experience, no self-respecting (let alone self-loving) Wisconsonian would use anything other than real, dairy-derived butter.
posted by PhatLobley at 11:37 AM on March 25, 2005


I was gonna say taz wins, but then I saw matt's tattoo.
posted by If I Had An Anus at 11:52 AM on March 25, 2005


That prison tat is so freakin' awesome I think I just overdosed on awesome. It feels like I just took my mountain bike off some sweet jumps while practicing my ninja skills.

From one of Matt's links:

drunk7daysaweek: oh... Hey, I wanna know if i'm really hung.. Wanna test it out and let me know?

sftbllchika06: No sorry I am pregnant


Classy and classic, that. Daaaayum.

What I've wanted to know for a few years now is if humanity was already ruined or can we blame most of it on the internet?
posted by loquacious at 12:12 PM on March 25, 2005


I'd like that graphic on a tshirt, please. Size medium.
posted by iconomy at 12:31 PM on March 25, 2005


What I've wanted to know for a few years now is if humanity was already ruined or can we blame most of it on the internet?

Sounds like a job for AskMe, no? : >
posted by amberglow at 12:34 PM on March 25, 2005


That tat logo on the back of a grey t-shirt with a very small Blue MeFi logo on the front-center would sell like crazy. I want two.

amberglow: You think your kung-fu is pretty good, eh? You ask it!
posted by loquacious at 12:49 PM on March 25, 2005


Well... that was funny.
Metafilter: Internet gustapo's we are.
posted by edgeways at 1:04 PM on March 25, 2005


andrew cooke writes "Jason Ritledge has stolen links from us"

Um, what circle of Hell is link stealing again? So he made a mistake. But it's Good Friday and it's traditional to pardon a thief in order to crucify a heretic-nationalist, so let's chill.

We really don't need to type his name a dozen times in hopes that somebody Googling it will happen upon this page and his life will be ruined. I mean, come on, he was stupid, perhaps, but I don't know that this rises to the level of "let's make sure he never works again".

Instead, let's remember on this of all days, Christ's love and His sacrifice on the Cross to redeem all our sins, and in that spirit, go out into the world today and full of Christ's love and for all sinners and embrace Christ's example of forgiveness by making sure two homosexuals who love each other very very much, almost as much as Christ loved us sinners, can't get married and have a happy fulfilling life.
posted by orthogonality at 1:23 PM on March 25, 2005


You're right orthogonality, let's see if he rises from the grave in three days. My money's on it not happening though.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 1:28 PM on March 25, 2005


*throws a stone at orthogonality*
posted by loquacious at 1:29 PM on March 25, 2005


orthogonality: "by making sure two homosexuals who love each other very very much, almost as much as Christ loved us sinners, can't get married and have a happy fulfilling life."

What does getting married have to do with having a "happy, fulfilling life?"

/Rodney Dangerfield
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 1:35 PM on March 25, 2005


I am so going to do something to get a tattoo like that. Just not for a looooooong while.
posted by exlotuseater at 2:28 PM on March 25, 2005


Ooo isn't he so dreamy and take-charge when he's banning someone?
*sigh*
posted by iconomy at 11:15 AM PST on March 25


Sorry, but someone else is having his baby (and polygamy is illegal in Oregon).
posted by WestCoaster at 2:32 PM on March 25, 2005


well, i'm sorry i've offended you yet again orthogonality. i suspect only anal jerks like you would not give a guy a job because of what i've written. but here's hoping.
posted by andrew cooke at 2:40 PM on March 25, 2005


loquacious writes " Quonsar would take the cash...."

Best Easter present EVAR! That was funny as hell. Thanks!

andrew cooke writes "only anal jerks like you"

I may be a jerk, but anal? I've the 'hey it's no big deal, so what somebody made a mistake that's part of being human, let a thousand flowers bloom, Newsfilter is ok, we all have different tastes, let's try to accommodate everyone with CSS tags and some extra code, let's let AskMefi be a therapy session if one of our guys needs it, quonsar is funny too, everything's all right, everything's fine, and we want you to sleep well tonight" mellowed out hippy flower child.

(Sure, I insert square brackets when I quote misspellings, but that's mostly to quiet my spell checker.)

And I love you man! Come on, sing Kumbaya with me, and then we'll chill to some Pete Seeger.
posted by orthogonality at 3:00 PM on March 25, 2005


I love you people!
posted by yodelingisfun at 3:25 PM on March 25, 2005


That was way too much of an entertaining read. Matt rocks.
posted by dazed_one at 4:49 PM on March 25, 2005


I just went to Cafe Press hoping that Matt had added a t-shirt with that "Banned" logo. But, no go. On the other hand, there is this new (to me, anyway) shirt.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 5:01 PM on March 25, 2005


Quonsar would take the cash, eat the wallet, and rush off to the nearest fishmarket to buy as much live bait squid as he can. He would take the live squid back to where he found the wallet, arrange it in obscenely suggestive ways, and then vomit the half-digested wallet atop it all. He would then recite "I'm a little tea-pot" in a voice fit for a Swedish Deathmetal band and then traumatically frighten the nearest toddler or infant with his impressions of David Cassidy on an acid and ether binge, finishing off by calmly eating a pocket calculator while muttering the digits of Pi, backwards.

well, who at the end of the day can honestly say they haven't done that?
posted by quonsar at 10:06 PM on March 25, 2005


matthowie ... you are my zombie jesus!
posted by furtive at 10:13 PM on March 25, 2005


I tried, but I couldn't eat the whole wallet.
posted by cortex at 8:24 AM on March 26, 2005


You ate it, Ralph.
posted by sonofsamiam at 9:20 AM on March 26, 2005


*plop plop, fizz fizz!*
posted by soyjoy at 9:56 PM on March 26, 2005


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