A man sodomising a chicken
May 15, 2006 5:40 PM   Subscribe

ZoophiliaFilter: Would it be wrong to use AskMe to request graphic imagery of a man sodomising a chicken?
posted by sjvilla79 to Etiquette/Policy at 5:40 PM (89 comments total) 23 users marked this as a favorite

It's based on a joke. And yeah it's for a friend. Of course I already have my own chicken.
posted by sjvilla79 at 5:40 PM on May 15, 2006


Aren't you kind of already asking for graphic imagery of a man sodomising a chicken?

I'm assuming you've already google image-d "man sodomising chicken" and well, I don't even want to know.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 5:45 PM on May 15, 2006


Dude. Photoshop.
posted by mediareport at 5:51 PM on May 15, 2006


yes yes yes [these are nsfw, #2 especially so]
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 5:54 PM on May 15, 2006 [28 favorites]


(Why did I look? WHY?)

I guess rabbits really are horny. I'm going to go wash my eyes.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 5:56 PM on May 15, 2006


Fucking hell!
posted by strawberryviagra at 6:01 PM on May 15, 2006


Oh my jessamyn you did not!
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 6:02 PM on May 15, 2006


.... that was foul!
posted by strawberryviagra at 6:02 PM on May 15, 2006


Poor Orsense, Spain man.
posted by piratebowling at 6:04 PM on May 15, 2006


it's sad that the link in the middle was already greyed out in my browser.
posted by StrasbourgSecaucus at 6:06 PM on May 15, 2006 [3 favorites]


*gag*
posted by michaelkuznet at 6:10 PM on May 15, 2006


Metatalk:Best Baste Bestiality of the web.
posted by TimeFactor at 6:13 PM on May 15, 2006


[+fave]
posted by horsewithnoname at 6:16 PM on May 15, 2006


marked as fantastic.
posted by sbutler at 6:17 PM on May 15, 2006


That man is risking salmonella! What's he thinking?
posted by ColdChef at 6:20 PM on May 15, 2006


It's chicken lover.
posted by bardic at 6:23 PM on May 15, 2006


Jessamyn, I am laughing so hard I'm crying. I love metafilter with all of my heart.
posted by nomad at 6:27 PM on May 15, 2006


And how in the world did you find that middle picture?
posted by horsewithnoname at 6:34 PM on May 15, 2006


Would it be wrong to use AskMe to request graphic imagery of a man sodomising a chicken?

According to the basic precepts of every single major (and minor) religion in the world - yes. Yes it would.
posted by dgaicun at 6:42 PM on May 15, 2006


Google images [nsfw, natch], seriously. Yahoo images is grosser content-wise, which surprised me.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 6:44 PM on May 15, 2006


I think I just got salmonella in my eyes.
posted by furtive at 6:46 PM on May 15, 2006


jessamyn writes " yes yes yes"

wtf jessamyn. <3
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 6:49 PM on May 15, 2006


No
posted by mr_crash_davis at 6:53 PM on May 15, 2006


But your eyes say yes, crash. Your eyes say yes.
posted by mediareport at 6:58 PM on May 15, 2006


Trying to teach someone to read, there sjvilla?

on preview...bardic by a nose...
posted by kosem at 6:59 PM on May 15, 2006


And how in the world did you find that middle picture?

She's got access to that special internet that only the librarians are allowed on. Sometimes they smuggle stuff out.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 7:12 PM on May 15, 2006 [1 favorite]


Based on her recent posting history, I will henceforth refer to jessamyn as Penis Picture Lady.
posted by gsteff at 7:16 PM on May 15, 2006


Actually it shows up as the 6th images on GIS for 'chicken sex'
posted by delmoi at 7:17 PM on May 15, 2006



posted by Eideteker at 7:18 PM on May 15, 2006 [1 favorite]


From "The People v Lenny Bruce ..."

Q. . . . Are you familiar with the portion of the script of the April 1st performance that deals with sodomy, sex with animals, dogs and cats and I think hippopotamuses and the SPCA--and then goes on, 'If you came home and found your husband with a chicken would you belt him, really feel bad, bad. A chicken, ah it's an odd bed, ah I felt like ah, I'm the last one to know.' Will you tell us what the artistry, or the social value, or the merit, or the good is, in the Bruce story of sexual intercourse with a chicken?
Mr. Garbus: I will object to Mr. Kuh's characterization of Mr. Bruce's performances. The testimony has already been that this is not a discussion of sex with animals per se, but rather a social comment made by the use of these symbols.
Judge Murtagh: Objection overruled.
posted by R. Mutt at 7:19 PM on May 15, 2006


Note to self: Never, ever ask a librarian for naughty pictures.
posted by loquacious at 7:20 PM on May 15, 2006


A tip for Thanksgiving at jessamyn's - Don't eat the stuffing.
posted by eyeballkid at 7:24 PM on May 15, 2006 [2 favorites]


The one in the middle was sick, that chicken was DEAD!
posted by tellurian at 7:26 PM on May 15, 2006


So it is actually a "how to" interspecies necrophelia photo. Impressive.
posted by R. Mutt at 7:31 PM on May 15, 2006


I'm sorry, is this the thread with reverse bovine necro-felching?
posted by Dunwitty at 7:56 PM on May 15, 2006 [1 favorite]


Jesus, did I say that out loud?
posted by Dunwitty at 7:57 PM on May 15, 2006 [1 favorite]


See also.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 8:05 PM on May 15, 2006 [3 favorites]


what
posted by exlotuseater at 8:17 PM on May 15, 2006


... and this.
posted by monju_bosatsu at 8:18 PM on May 15, 2006


best of teh web
posted by keswick at 8:23 PM on May 15, 2006


There was a time I'd have clicked those links, just out of morbid curiousity.

I am somewhat relieved to discover that I no longer have any morbid curiousity. I have no desire to click those links at all.

Hallelujuah, I am saved!
posted by five fresh fish at 8:29 PM on May 15, 2006 [2 favorites]


oh god damn you to hell, fandango. damn you straight to hell.
posted by five fresh fish at 8:30 PM on May 15, 2006


Yeah, y'know, I'm really glad I'm not at work today. You fuck. You chicken-fucking fucker.
posted by loquacious at 8:30 PM on May 15, 2006



posted by brain_drain at 8:31 PM on May 15, 2006 [1 favorite]


why was this thread deleted?
posted by 3.2.3 at 8:35 PM on May 15, 2006


sjvilla79, you're one of those high-maintenance people, aren't you?
posted by planetkyoto at 8:36 PM on May 15, 2006



posted by Zozo at 8:47 PM on May 15, 2006 [3 favorites]


MY EYES. OH GOD IT BURNS.
posted by Justinian at 9:06 PM on May 15, 2006


Thanks for the laughs guys. It's 12:20am and I'm at work, but now I'm slightly happier.
posted by knave at 9:18 PM on May 15, 2006


I was slightly happier before I saw the PENIS being shoved into the CHICKEN.
posted by Justinian at 9:20 PM on May 15, 2006




/fark.metafilter.com, coming soon
//ya rly
posted by sbutler at 9:24 PM on May 15, 2006


Between this post and the RustyBottoms self link, I have laughed myself to tears. Thank you Metafilter for cheering me up after that bitch of a Grey's Anatomy finale.
posted by chiababe at 9:25 PM on May 15, 2006


Does anyone find it ironic that the first of jessamyn's links is hosted at funnymatt.com? Matt? Something you want to tell us?
posted by greatgefilte at 9:51 PM on May 15, 2006



posted by Nice Donkey at 10:06 PM on May 15, 2006


Holy shit, I've never been so glad for the greasemonkey script that replaces images with links than I am now. I'm not clicking a damn thing here. But the reactions from those that have are hysterical.
posted by FunkyHelix at 10:20 PM on May 15, 2006


Between this post and the RustyBottoms self link, I have laughed myself to tears.

i cannot believe how late i've stayed up checking back and forth between this thread and rusty bottoms. tomorrow i'll be waking up at work occasionally, laughing maniacally to myself, then falling back asleep.
posted by 3.2.3 at 10:30 PM on May 15, 2006


I just think that it's deliciously eponysterical that both birdherder and If I Had An Anus have bookmarked this post as a favorite.
posted by taz at 10:38 PM on May 15, 2006


watch out, you might catch crabs
posted by Rhomboid at 10:48 PM on May 15, 2006 [1 favorite]


I am feeling a little uncomfortable in my pantsal regions.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 10:51 PM on May 15, 2006


I...I'm sorry, but I can't help it:

Metafilter: I was slightly happier before I saw the PENIS being shoved into the CHICKEN.
posted by kosher_jenny at 10:54 PM on May 15, 2006


I...I'm sorry, but I can't help it:

Metafilter: I was slightly happier before I saw the PENIS being shoved into the CHICKEN.


And a CRAB! Yikes!
posted by spacelux at 11:02 PM on May 15, 2006


At this point spacelux, I ain't clicking on any more links that are posted in this thread.
posted by kosher_jenny at 11:18 PM on May 15, 2006


Thanks, everyone. My innocence is now gone forever. A special thanks goes out to Rhomboid for making me see the "bizarre insertions" section on that page.
posted by Iamtherealme at 11:50 PM on May 15, 2006


That's probably a good call Jenny (unless you want to be bulimic).
posted by spacelux at 11:50 PM on May 15, 2006


Now I have to ask - does anyone have a link to the deleted thread about the guy who injected insane amounts of silicone into his penis and scrotum? I'm surprised it hasn't shown up here, and just as surprised that I can't find it. But I'm definately way more surprised that I'm even looking for it.
posted by Iamtherealme at 12:15 AM on May 16, 2006


NSFW.

Fandango: I don't think it's really apropriate to post NSFW images inline.
posted by delmoi at 12:21 AM on May 16, 2006


bwahaha (nsfw)

Monju, that dickcream.com site is just the gift that keeps on giving.
posted by delmoi at 12:23 AM on May 16, 2006


I'm going to bookmark this page in case I'm ever poisoned and don't have any ipecac.
posted by Devils Slide at 5:19 AM on May 16, 2006 [1 favorite]


There was a time I'd have clicked those links, just out of morbid curiousity.

You and me both, amigo. And I'm glad by the time I got here whatever evil filth fandango posted had been scrubbed from the thread.

I'm going now, and I'm not looking back. He might do it again...
posted by languagehat at 5:59 AM on May 16, 2006


whatever evil filth fandango posted

It was the two man-fucks-chicken pics jessamyn posted. Just animated.
posted by mediareport at 7:20 AM on May 16, 2006


When matt implemented "faves", I understood how it could be used for threads, but didn't see the point in faving comments. Now I have finally faved some comments.
posted by Bugbread at 8:19 AM on May 16, 2006


If this is gonna be that kinda party, I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes.
posted by exogenous at 10:14 AM on May 16, 2006 [1 favorite]


Don't have sex with cows.
posted by Mean Mr. Bucket at 10:28 AM on May 16, 2006


This thread reminds me of a story. I grew up in East TN, and knew a cop who worked on the sex crimes unit in Johnson City who shared this delightful gem with me. Some farmer had called in a complaint about someone killing his chickens. On and off for two weeks, he would wake up to find a dead chicken outside of the coop. Several chickens had been killed, but never more than one at a time. It was too clean to be the work of animals. They set up surveillance, and it turned out to be a chicken fucker. They caught him in the act. They arrested him, but later found out that chicken fucking is not an actually sex crime. They could only prosecute him for cruelty to animals and destruction of property. Evidently, that particular act kills the chicken. Sorry folks, these are my stories.
posted by kimdog at 11:17 AM on May 16, 2006 [1 favorite]


DIY: "Begin with a bird...."
posted by wryly at 11:25 AM on May 16, 2006


If I Had An Anus marked this as a favourite. That's beautiful.
posted by raedyn at 12:51 PM on May 16, 2006


I'm in the one-room apartment,
located in the basement under the Polish National Church.
It used to be a club...
And then a mental health outpatient clinic...
Now, I call it home.

There's a king-sized mattress in the middle of the room,
Where me and the big fat lead singer from Canned Heat
Finish up an afternoon of incredibly hot sex.
Boy does he have a big one.

Joining us for late afternoon tea in a 4-way
Is my old next-door neighbor Jimbo and his wife,
Who is a chicken.

Since I'm the only woman there with hands,
I soon find myself fully occupied.
I can't help but wonder how Jimbo and his wife had their baby,
Who had been sleeping next to us, but had since fallen onto the floor.
She must be able to change forms, back and forth.

And what about chicken pussy?
Is it enticing?
I mean what's the story?

posted by jack_mo at 1:11 PM on May 16, 2006


*basks in the rays of metafilters golden age*
posted by sgt.serenity at 2:31 PM on May 16, 2006


What can follow
penis in a waterfowl
only the silence
posted by Justinian at 2:33 PM on May 16, 2006


Penis in chicken?
Perhaps it's art: Two Stiff Cocks.
Finger-lickin' good.
posted by fandango_matt at 3:06 PM on May 16, 2006


Chicken with penis
Mashed potatoes and coleslaw
Secret Recipe.
posted by fandango_matt at 3:13 PM on May 16, 2006


I have fucked
the chickens
that were in
the henhouse

and which
you were probably
saving
for egg-laying

Forgive me
they were delightful
so tight
and so hot.

i hate myself now.
posted by five fresh fish at 3:58 PM on May 16, 2006 [6 favorites]


Don't have sex with cows.


posted by quonsar at 3:59 PM on May 16, 2006


Monju, that dickcream.com site is just the gift that keeps on giving.

Oh, wow. (nsfw) It makes me gag a little.
posted by Nice Donkey at 9:53 PM on May 16, 2006


man can know poultry
but leave unanswered questions:
was the bird frigid?
posted by bjorkbjorkbjork! at 10:59 PM on May 16, 2006


faliz navidad, silicone guy, wood pooping girl
posted by psychobum at 10:00 AM on May 17, 2006


BTW - Could someone (jessamyn!) please mark those three links at the top NSFW.
I figured it was actually a joke, not someone with their cock in a ... cock.
posted by milovoo at 12:42 PM on May 17, 2006


Yesterday I was about to make some crack about those links needing marked NSFW, but I stopped myself because I figured it would start a flamewar about how much we should be protecting people from clicking on naughty links. But I was only kidding.
posted by raedyn at 12:53 PM on May 17, 2006


Could someone (jessamyn!) please mark those three links at the top NSFW.

yeah good point, done. I figured it was clear from context (or the URL) but can't hurt.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 1:45 PM on May 17, 2006


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