I'm really not trying to be glib

I know this is a private website, where the administrator has a strong interest in avoiding litigation by celebrities, but what I saw happen in the last hour or so is just creepy.
posted by jayder to etiquette/policy at 8:12 PM (120 comments total) 5 users marked this as a favorite

There does seem to be an unusual number of broken links in the Metatalk feed this evening.
posted by grobstein at 8:18 PM on March 12, 2007

What happened?
posted by lee at 8:18 PM on March 12, 2007

What's so creepy about it?
posted by iconomy at 8:19 PM on March 12, 2007

Matt has been over this time and time again. This thread will not end any different than any other. Best to just move on, or if you really can't, e-mail him.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:20 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

It's the Tom Cruise thing-that-shall-not-be-named again. It keeps coming up as folks discover the original is missing, and keeps getting deleted for legal reasons that haven't ever been made very clear.
posted by mediareport at 8:21 PM on March 12, 2007

It's probably best that nobody mention the name of the celebrity or the topic of the post/question, but it appeared that a discussion was nuked (as have several prior discussions about the same celebrity) because said celebrity (you can probably guess who it was) is notoriously litigious.

And I am not criticizing the moderators, by any means. I just think it's really sad that certain topics are basically off limits due to the insanity and wealth of certain celebrities.
posted by jayder at 8:21 PM on March 12, 2007

You know what's really creepy? Scien-------....What? I was going to say "Science Fairs." Jeez.
posted by ColdChef at 8:22 PM on March 12, 2007 [2 favorites]

Nobody likes a lawsuit.
posted by ColdChef at 8:23 PM on March 12, 2007

Except a lawyer.
posted by jonmc at 8:23 PM on March 12, 2007

It is not the owner (or administrator) of the site that needs to worry about litigation but rather the poster of a comment.

Read about how the owner of a website in the US is generally immune from civil actions for defamation arising out of a posters comment but that the poster enjoys no such immunity here.
posted by MLIS at 8:23 PM on March 12, 2007

Takin' care of business, old school style.
posted by Burhanistan at 8:24 PM on March 12, 2007 [18 favorites]

And let it be known that the commenter who posted the comment at the heart of all this has also said, repeatedly, they just want this whole mess to die.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:24 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

ok that was a really lame attempt at pseudo-cryptic sarcasam.
posted by Burhanistan at 8:25 PM on March 12, 2007

It is not the owner (or administrator) of the site that needs to worry about litigation but rather the poster of a comment.

Especially because of this: "All posts are © their original authors."
posted by danb at 8:25 PM on March 12, 2007

#1 - The first rule of Fight Club is, you do not talk about Fight Club.
posted by lee at 8:25 PM on March 12, 2007

Rule #1: No one may talk about Tom Cruise.

Rule #2: No one may talk about Rule #1 or #2.

I hope that simplifies things.
posted by Mr. President Dr. Steve Elvis America at 8:26 PM on March 12, 2007 [5 favorites]

I'D LIKE TO IMPROVE THE SIGNAL TO NOISE RATIO ON THIS THREAD, SO I'M FLAGGING ALL IRRELEVANT, OBSCENE POSTS.

SCIENCE! MAKE ROOM FOR THE INTELLIGENTSIA!!
posted by and hosted from Uranus at 8:26 PM on March 12, 2007 [4 favorites]

Attempting pseudo-cryptic sarcasm is Risky Business, burhanistan.
posted by iconomy at 8:27 PM on March 12, 2007 [2 favorites]

they just want this whole mess to die

Too late for that, really; the original post's info has been copied online a bunch of places. It's searchable.
posted by mediareport at 8:28 PM on March 12, 2007

So the cyclops is back in the bag, and we should probably all be thankful. Remember what happened to Odysseus's crewmates? A cyclops is nothing to laugh at, especially when it's rich and has hired a pack of hungry lawyers.
posted by homunculus at 8:29 PM on March 12, 2007

Huh. I read the Cyclops episode of Ulysses just this afternoon.
posted by danb at 8:30 PM on March 12, 2007

< -------- insert nucular device hereabouts---------->
posted by peacay at 8:30 PM on March 12, 2007

WHAT DOES "." MEAN????
posted by Krrrlson at 8:31 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

YOU THINK DELETED COMMENTS IS CREEPY? TAKE A LONG HARD LOOK, MR. CREEPED-OUT-BOY. I AM THE GOD OF DELETED COMMENTS.
posted by quonsar at 8:33 PM on March 12, 2007

I'd have a lot more to add if I had the foggiest notion of what the hell is going on here.
posted by jonmc at 8:33 PM on March 12, 2007

*sacrifices pixilated goat to quonsar*
posted by jonmc at 8:33 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

This whole duclod thing is freaking me out way more than this. More scary please!
posted by Mid at 8:37 PM on March 12, 2007

Also, if someone could make a celing cat .gif where the duclod guy comes out of the celing, I would crap my pants.
posted by Mid at 8:38 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

So we are to never speak of -om -rusie. Is that the long and -hort of it.
posted by nola at 8:40 PM on March 12, 2007

WTF is the orihginal callout about? Will somebody tell me what's going on?
posted by davy at 8:40 PM on March 12, 2007

*eats popcorn, relaxes in lawn chair*
posted by jeversol at 8:40 PM on March 12, 2007

Some threads are useless without the image tag;
for everything else, there's mastercard.
posted by blue_beetle at 8:40 PM on March 12, 2007

WTF is the orihginal callout about? Will somebody tell me what's going on?

The requisite clues are all in this thread. I'm not going to link to what I found for fear that whatever is making the information disappear from MetaFilter and MetaTalk is going to attempt to disappear it wherever it appears.
posted by oaf at 8:44 PM on March 12, 2007

Oh for fuck's sake, this is at least the fourth MeTa thread on this. Give it a rest.
posted by Rhomboid at 8:48 PM on March 12, 2007

Iday umonesay Omtay Oozcray? Utway idday ehay ooday isthey imetay?
posted by serazin at 8:48 PM on March 12, 2007

What's quonsar done THIS time?
posted by davy at 8:51 PM on March 12, 2007

In Eyes Wide Shut, there's a scene where Tom Cruise's character is informed that any further inquiry along the lines he's pursuing will result in harm to him and those he loves. Similarly, if you keep bringing this up, you will harm at least one MeFite (who has had this comment come up in a job interview, reportedly) who, regardless of your personal feelings for Crazy Celebrity of the Week, doesn't deserve to have this permanently hanging around his personal and professional neck.
posted by Eideteker at 8:55 PM on March 12, 2007 [4 favorites]

quonsar is Suri's father?!?!?
posted by wendell at 8:57 PM on March 12, 2007

It's all part of a devilish scheme to let thetan infection rates soar so that Matt can cash in on the world's bestest most successful pyramid scheme and bask in his newfound bilionairiness. With the profits he'll start a new site, Cruisefilter, where adoring fans can post dreamy-eyed appreciations of timeless cinematic dialogue like "worship the cock" and "you can be my wingman." Decades later, scholars will search through the fragments of deleted threads wondering if Matt was a double- or triple-agent. MacMillan (2041) will advance the controversial theory that Haughey was in fact a quintuple-agent with at least three distinct conflicts of interest, but the evidence will be tenuous at best and the theory largely met with the academic equivalent of a blank stare and an embarrassed change of subject.
posted by Tuwa at 8:57 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

one MeFite (who has had this comment come up in a job interview, reportedly)

Seriously?
posted by oaf at 8:58 PM on March 12, 2007

Seriously or not, it's not something you want to fuck around with, just because you find something funny. This is another person's life. We all feel the pressure of having celebrities crammed down our throat in one way or another, but this is not an appropriate way to relieve that pressure.
posted by Eideteker at 9:02 PM on March 12, 2007

"Plato was gay? Mickey Mouse's dog was gay?"
posted by davy at 9:02 PM on March 12, 2007

Please, people, let it go already.
posted by ikkyu2 at 9:03 PM on March 12, 2007

This thread makes it seem less creepy, and implies that the original poster, not admin is the one threatened with litigation.
posted by Manjusri at 9:03 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

(Not you, personally, but the people who keep posting this shit, and taking it to MetaChat, etc., because they can't read an archive and see that there's a reason their favorite ha-ha was taken down.)
posted by Eideteker at 9:05 PM on March 12, 2007

Eideteker: I'm not sure what you mean. Bringing the comment up in a job interview is incredibly inappropriate. The problem is not with the poster of the comment.
posted by oaf at 9:06 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

God, it's so embarrassing to be on the wrong end of this topic. Believe me, everyone, if you don't know what's going on here that's OK. Blurting it out is really terrible, for everyone involved. If you can't just let it go and have to know, it's like they said, there's hints upstairs and you can Google them as long as you're quiet downstairs.

Oh, also, there is no cabal.
posted by carsonb at 9:07 PM on March 12, 2007

It's clear from the fact that neither this nor the Unicorn Troll will die that there is no one minding the store.
posted by nanojath at 9:20 PM on March 12, 2007

Hitler.
posted by Krrrlson at 9:21 PM on March 12, 2007

Eideteker, I don't think everyone sees it as a "ha-ha." It was interesting, and folks keep rediscovering it's now missing. They don't know the history, and since Matt's been fairly strict about deleting references that explain it, I don't think you're being very fair to the folks who occasionally pop up in MeTa to ask questions about the absence. It's not like they're doing it to deliberately make the original poster's life miserable (although, to be honest, I'm not sure how that could happen, given the relatively benign nature of the speculation).
posted by mediareport at 9:21 PM on March 12, 2007

It's clear from the fact that neither this nor the Unicorn Troll will die that there is no one minding the store.

You keep a lookout and I'll snag us a case of PBR.
posted by sourwookie at 9:25 PM on March 12, 2007

Whoever figures out what the hell is going on, please post your research to the front page. Mysteries are always best of the web.
posted by Pastabagel at 9:29 PM on March 12, 2007

you're going to steal PBR? The fucks wrong with you?
posted by nola at 9:30 PM on March 12, 2007

I'm sorry , I'm sorry. I just wish you would aim higher SW.
posted by nola at 9:30 PM on March 12, 2007

You know who else was named hitler?

HITLER!
posted by Balisong at 9:32 PM on March 12, 2007 [3 favorites]

Google is your friend.
posted by eustacescrubb at 9:33 PM on March 12, 2007

WHAT DOES "." MEAN????

It's a pinhead.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 9:34 PM on March 12, 2007

This is all Daylight Savings fallout, right? Short on sleep, disoriented?

Seriously.
posted by cortex at 9:38 PM on March 12, 2007

Oh. After some research, I see: the moral of this story is we should contribute to the March of Dimes to help stamp out birth defects.
posted by davy at 9:40 PM on March 12, 2007

Look, for those of you who are wondering, let me explain without being too graphic:

There was this post, see? And it was about a guy. And there was this thing this guy liked to do in certain places. And certain other people found out and suggested that a different thing was probably the reason behind the first thing. And then this woman said this thing about the guy and this other thing and this other place and there was a thing about nipples. And this guy threatened to do this thing to these people using this other thing and this larger thing and several small things as a counterbalance. And then we all did this thing and took out these various things and did a certain thing with them that left small lumps of stuff all over various things. And that's basically it.
posted by ColdChef at 9:43 PM on March 12, 2007 [8 favorites]

Google is your friend.

Oooh, and we were riding the line so well up until now, too.

*waves goodbye to thread*
posted by mediareport at 9:45 PM on March 12, 2007

Geez. You make it sound like a cross between an orgy and a biopsy.
posted by sourwookie at 9:45 PM on March 12, 2007

eustacescrubb, Google works better with more precise search terms.
posted by davy at 9:51 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

You make it sound like a cross between an orgy and a biopsy.

I've apparently said too much.
posted by ColdChef at 9:51 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

You've definitely killed the thread now, davy.
posted by oaf at 9:52 PM on March 12, 2007

(And I am trying to be glib. Any deluded celebrity's lawyers are welcome to make ME famous.)
posted by davy at 9:52 PM on March 12, 2007

Geez louise, what did I miss? Walk away for a few hours and things go KEERAAAAAAZY.
posted by miss lynnster at 9:56 PM on March 12, 2007

I'll outdo Quonsar yet. I want to be the curmudgeonly troll some celebrity sued! Yoo-hoo, OVER HERE!!
posted by davy at 9:57 PM on March 12, 2007

Chef , thanks for trying to help . . . but that don't help. In fact I thought I kinda knew what was going on, but now I'm sure I don't. And really, I'm ok with that. But I am enjoying this thread.
posted by nola at 9:58 PM on March 12, 2007

Oh, I wasn't trying to help.
posted by ColdChef at 9:59 PM on March 12, 2007

Wait, what the fuck? No, no, I followed the google shit. Still, what the fuck?
posted by klangklangston at 10:02 PM on March 12, 2007

Hey, I'm just trying to get famous for something besides my itty bitty teenie weenie. (Warning: more Google shit!)
posted by davy at 10:04 PM on March 12, 2007

davy writes "I want to be the curmudgeonly troll"

It seems to be working out well for you.
posted by peacay at 10:04 PM on March 12, 2007

(Oh, if I only had an IMG tag.)
posted by davy at 10:06 PM on March 12, 2007

Can you be sued for hosting HTML code which contains a link to a site in Chile?
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 10:06 PM on March 12, 2007

"Can you be sued for hosting HTML code which contains a link to a site in Chile?"

Isn't that an AskMe question?
posted by davy at 10:07 PM on March 12, 2007

I used up mine last week.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 10:08 PM on March 12, 2007 [2 favorites]

You've definitely killed the thread now, davy.

If it gets deleted, then someone will invariably ask again. The more often this happens, the more MeFites will follow the trail and figure out what happened, meaning more people will read the comment. A catch-22, really. By bringing on the lawyers, Unnamed Celebrity may have assured the meme's survival, and worse, he may have solidified the thoery proposed in the comment as fact, even if it isn't true. If only he were rich and famous, and had a publicist to advise him in matters like these.
posted by eustacescrubb at 10:09 PM on March 12, 2007 [1 favorite]

So far I'm pretty sure Unnamed Celebrity is NOT the Duclod Man; s/he doesn't have enough imagination.
posted by davy at 10:12 PM on March 12, 2007

Wow. . .just. . .wow.

And I am trying to be glib. Any deluded celebrity's lawyers are welcome to make ME famous.

It is not about you. Since this is a community, presumably you read what Eideteker had to say, up-thread? Or the original poster himself?

Many of us could have posted the search string you did, but we didn't (It's called class, see mediareport, who also knew the proper search string but did not post it).

It would be nice if your wish came true and you were forced to hire a lawyer at $400 an hour to defend against an action.

What, you think the legal community would line up to do pro bono work for you as if you were Salim Ahmed Hamdan?

LMAO.
posted by MLIS at 10:13 PM on March 12, 2007

Um, MLIS, there will be no suit. (CYA!)
posted by davy at 10:19 PM on March 12, 2007

Wow. . .just. . .wow.

stop...please...fucking stop
posted by docpops at 10:25 PM on March 12, 2007

What should be on that big "Hollywood" sign instead.
posted by davy at 10:30 PM on March 12, 2007

"All right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up."
posted by davy at 10:35 PM on March 12, 2007

And as my parting shot, my previous quip made me think of some decent career advice for Someone Unnamed.
posted by davy at 10:39 PM on March 12, 2007

So you hit that five dollar bottle of wine pretty hard then.
posted by nanojath at 10:45 PM on March 12, 2007

damn it! ive been reading the blue all this time! I missed all the excitement.
posted by Brainy at 10:53 PM on March 12, 2007

eustacescrubb - so you're saying that MeFi is Tom Cruise's tarbaby, eh?

Heh. I'd say it's more like the world is his tarbaby.
posted by Afroblanco at 10:57 PM on March 12, 2007

But... but... I love MetaFilter!
posted by Tom Cruise at 11:19 PM on March 12, 2007 [7 favorites]

Wow.
posted by inconsequentialist at 11:24 PM on March 12, 2007

I'm sure there are at least one billion better uses for that five dollars you just blew.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:43 PM on March 12, 2007

It was stupid, lazy and totally unnecessary post. Google Tom Cruise Cyclops and click on the first link. Whoa, was that hard or what ?
posted by y2karl at 11:52 PM on March 12, 2007

Is this about that doctor that posted all that stuff about that guy's messed up teeth and his wierd retard babies? If it is, I'm wondering why that's being brought up over and over again. I don't remember it being a big deal.
posted by puke & cry at 12:19 AM on March 13, 2007

Wait a second. This is the only Metafilter comment ever made by Tom Cruise. I'm sensing that there are some serious Thetan issues going on here. Xenu is pissed. This post is SOOOO not clear.
posted by miss lynnster at 12:19 AM on March 13, 2007

I knew about this all along. I just wanted to say that so I could feel superior and stuff. Carry on.
posted by liquorice at 12:33 AM on March 13, 2007

We need a "Flag if likely to cause litigation" button.
posted by seanyboy at 12:48 AM on March 13, 2007 [2 favorites]

I claim this thread and all of its thetans for the glory of myself and my descendants!
posted by grapefruitmoon at 12:58 AM on March 13, 2007

See here.
posted by puke & cry at 1:07 AM on March 13, 2007

I knew about the since-deleted claims years ago, discovered in a thesis-avoidance celebrity google fest during university. But what I want to know if if the admins have deleted anything else major because of lawyers - perhaps things more important than stupid celebrity crap. What are the unknown unknowns of MetaFilter?
posted by By The Grace of God at 1:27 AM on March 13, 2007

puke & cry writes "If it is, I'm wondering why that's being brought up over and over again. I don't remember it being a big deal."

Because lawyers threatened legal action, which they would probably lose if taken to court, but which would financially destroy the doctor and a certain reclining-cyclist PVR devotee in the process. It wasn't a big deal when it happened, but it was a big deal later, and part of the getting-threatened process involved a big deal of it not being made of here, which is why previous threads in which it became a big deal are no longer here...and which is why, in all probability, when this happens again in a few months, you won't be able to find this thread either.
posted by bugbread at 2:38 AM on March 13, 2007

danb: "It is not the owner (or administrator) of the site that needs to worry about litigation but rather the poster of a comment.

Especially because of this: "All posts are © their original authors.""

That's fucking bullshit. Only a child would think that means that Matt doesn't have to worry about litigation. First of all, anyone can sue anyone for any time. Litigation itself only requires a lawyer, not proof, not a legitimate cause, not even Matt to be the original author of the content in question. And since the so-called victim of the alleged libel probably has enough money to drown a horse. Matt only has half that much. Second, "copyright" does not equal "the sole legal responsibility of". If someone posted pirated MP3s on Music, Matt would be responsible for hosting them, and so he'd be liable for litigation. It's the same here. He facilitated the distribution of the comment, so is entirely within the reach of a tort.
posted by Plutor at 3:52 AM on March 13, 2007

It costs that much money to drown a horse?
posted by liquorice at 4:07 AM on March 13, 2007

liquorice writes "It costs that much money to drown a horse?"

Well, think about how much water you get when you wring out a dollar bill. Not much, right? Now imagine how many dollar bills you'd have to wring out to get enough to drown a horse with.
posted by bugbread at 4:15 AM on March 13, 2007

I'll outdo Quonsar yet.

Going to say something funny one of these weeks? It'd be welcome.
posted by Wolof at 4:39 AM on March 13, 2007

Ugh, no more posting right after getting out of bed.

...anyone can sue anyone for anything at any time...
...And ~~since~~ the so-called victim...
posted by Plutor at 4:45 AM on March 13, 2007

i'd post something brilliant and witty here, but it would just be vaporized with the rest of the thread
posted by pyramid termite at 5:15 AM on March 13, 2007

Okay, so if i understand this correctly, this is all about a certain much-favorited comment made by a prolific askme answerer about a certain famous celebrity? Because I remember that comment, and as funny as it is, the world and metafilter will survive without it.
posted by empath at 5:37 AM on March 13, 2007

What are the unknown unknowns of MetaFilter?

If. You. Only. Knew.
posted by octobersurprise at 5:47 AM on March 13, 2007

Brad Pitt is cooler anyway.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:56 AM on March 13, 2007

> ...the so-called victim of the alleged libel probably has enough money to drown a horse. Matt only has half that much.

That would still be enough money to buy us all ponies. Drowned ponies.
posted by ardgedee at 6:20 AM on March 13, 2007

You want the tooth? You can't handle the tooth!
posted by Abiezer at 6:24 AM on March 13, 2007 [3 favorites]

I'm starting a religion based on Alfred Bester's The Stars My Destination. We're all gonna get cool facial tattoos and then have them removed, leaving extensive facial scarring that only shows when we get mad and shout "V0RGA, I kill you filthy!"

The immolated man is my personal savior.
posted by breezeway at 6:25 AM on March 13, 2007 [3 favorites]

ruh roh, some of my comments show up in some of those google searches. Don't hurt me, mr. lawyer guys! I is sorry.
posted by Justinian at 6:36 AM on March 13, 2007

ruh roh, some of my comments show up in some of those google searches. Don't hurt me, mr. lawyer guys! I is sorry.

Aw, fucking hell.
posted by dreamsign at 6:50 AM on March 13, 2007

Ok, the deletions are gonna happen. I just hate that I was sitting there none the wiser while it was going on. Can I have a big red cherry light and alarm when matexmyn starts hitting the delete button? I feel like my universe is being sucked into a gray hole, here.
posted by dreamsign at 6:52 AM on March 13, 2007

It is not about you.

That's the point—davy wants everything to be about him. When he's drunk, anyway. The drunk part is a guess, obviously, but it's the only way I can explain the fact that sometimes he's funny and lucid but most of the time he acts like a five-year-old hopped up on sugar. Seriously, davy, you don't have to jump up and down and piss on yourself to get noticed.

Also, this post is mindbogglingly pointless and stupid. "I know this is a private website, where the administrator has a strong interest in avoiding litigation by celebrities, but what I saw happen in the last hour or so is just creepy." So send him an e-mail if you care that much. Jesus.
posted by languagehat at 7:00 AM on March 13, 2007

Hitler.
posted by Krrrlson at 11:21 PM CST on March 12 [+]
[!]

So, anybody read The Castle in the Forest? I was enjoying it pretty well last night until I hit the first big twist about the narrator; I went from, "wow, Mailer's pulling this off," to "there's no fucking way he can keep this up." Half an hour later, I had to go to sleep because I don't like reading about dog abuse, even if it's Hitler's dog.
posted by COBRA! at 7:01 AM on March 13, 2007

Enjoy the ride down the memory hole. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
posted by monju_bosatsu at 7:03 AM on March 13, 2007

I know this is a private website, where the administrator has a strong interest in avoiding litigation by celebrities, but what I saw happen in the last hour or so is just creepy.

And so your response, after seeing all of those other threads deleted is to start another one?
posted by Dave Faris at 7:16 AM on March 13, 2007

I'm really not trying to be glib March 12, 2007 8:12 PM Subscribe

I'm really not trying to be glib
March 12, 2007 8:12 PM Subscribe