Ouch.

February 1, 2008 4:54 AM

Ouch.
posted by srboisvert to MetaFilter-Related at 4:54 AM (59 comments total)

Dilbert goes on dates, in person?
posted by R. Mutt at 5:29 AM on February 1, 2008

Yeah...it's Dilbert. I am incapable of feeling threatened by Dilbert.
posted by LeeJay at 5:30 AM on February 1, 2008 [2 favorites]

Also...Scott Adams. And...elipses.
posted by LeeJay at 5:30 AM on February 1, 2008

Sad fact is that it was a real-life friend who put me on to MeFi, and we do discuss these things in real life.

Is it too late to make this comment anonymously?
posted by pompomtom at 5:36 AM on February 1, 2008

Scott Adams smells like fail and roses.
posted by octobersurprise at 5:39 AM on February 1, 2008

Yeah but rich fail and roses.
posted by Doohickie at 5:41 AM on February 1, 2008

While we're posting only tangentially-MeFi-related links:
So I guess I got kicked off another My Little Pony forum.
posted by roofus at 5:43 AM on February 1, 2008 [25 favorites]

And several people brought this Dilbert to my attention last week for some reason.
posted by Doohickie at 5:44 AM on February 1, 2008

There's a place where MeFites go
To cry their troubles away
And they call it
MetaChat
Where the MetaChatters stay
[MetaChat]
posted by kittens for breakfast at 5:45 AM on February 1, 2008

I'm telling you, the My Little Pony fandom does not fuck around. Seriously, check the Fandom Wank archives sometime.
posted by LeeJay at 5:45 AM on February 1, 2008

Or, for links that actually WORK: check here. Look, my point is, those pony ladies will CUT YOU.
posted by LeeJay at 5:49 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

I am lost for words.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 5:56 AM on February 1, 2008

OMG this is exactly like that one time when a guy posted a link to something, but I didn't understand why. And then I just waited and waited, but I never did find out.
posted by poppo at 5:57 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

"I don't know where you get your facts. The first generation of MLP's were made by Hasbro, not the Khmer Rouge."
posted by LeeJay at 6:18 AM on February 1, 2008 [5 favorites]

OMG this is exactly like that one time when a guy posted a link to something, but I didn't understand why. And then I just waited and waited, but I never did find out.
It had no tail because the five-fifteen ran over it.
posted by tellurian at 6:28 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

I don't have any friends online, just multitudes of enemies to be crushed and abused.
posted by absalom at 6:38 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

Dilbert sucks. I remember for a while his site had "Stock Picks" and one of them was Red Hat, except he put the wrong ticker symbol in (RHAT, when actually the symbol was something else). Now he just tells everyone to invest in index funds, which would have killed you in the past few months.

So yeah, my feeling is that Scott Adams sucks.
posted by delmoi at 6:50 AM on February 1, 2008

So yeah, my feeling is that Scott Adams sucks.

Man popular for success in one field on endeavour fails in another field. Coming up after Shawna with the weather.
posted by GuyZero at 6:55 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

Adams is a stooge.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 7:00 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

You're all my friends ... aren't you?

*waits expectantly*
posted by lukemeister at 7:02 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

Dilbert sucks. I remember for a while his site had "Stock Picks" and one of them was Red Hat, except he put the wrong ticker symbol in (RHAT, when actually the symbol was something else). Now he just tells everyone to invest in index funds, which would have killed you in the past few months.

Um . . . people actually pay attention to stock picks by a cartoonist?
posted by brain_drain at 7:06 AM on February 1, 2008

I think he also believes in "teaching to controversy" about evolution.
posted by Pants! at 7:14 AM on February 1, 2008

Now he just tells everyone to invest in index funds, which would have killed you in the past few months.

Wow. This statement is exactly why most people would be better off following his advice. What does "in the past few months" have to do with saving for retirement?
posted by Armitage Shanks at 7:23 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

I'll be your friend.

Paypal accepted.
posted by ND¢ at 7:25 AM on February 1, 2008

I don't get how I'm supposed to be hurt by this cartoon. I don't have to "imagine having friends who are interested in the same things". I'm on MetaFilter, and I know for sure there are people interested in the same obscure things as me. Perhaps this cartoon is a veiled swipe at all non-Mefites in the world? Mwa ha ha! Joke's on them!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 7:46 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

You. Are. All. My. Friends.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 7:52 AM on February 1, 2008 [7 favorites]

And Hasbro hasn't made toys out of human skulls since the 1960's.

Ummm.
posted by chugg at 7:54 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

Yeah, that was my favorite sentence too, chugg.
posted by box at 7:58 AM on February 1, 2008

Jessamyn, did you mean to say "I.Have.Been.And.Always.Shall.Be... Your.Friend"? If so, consider my hand on the glass.
posted by ND¢ at 8:13 AM on February 1, 2008 [4 favorites]

<post deleted by Princess Biscuit>
posted by quin at 8:13 AM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

We are you friends.
You'll never be alone again.
Well, come on!
posted by carsonb at 8:17 AM on February 1, 2008

quin, I don't really understand what you mean by any of that. Are you saying My Little Pony is some kind of cult? I've never heard of any of the mass suicides you mention. And what is this "horrible truth" that you keep referring to?
posted by burnmp3s at 8:20 AM on February 1, 2008 [5 favorites]

I just met the guy who illustrates My Little Pony for Hasbro. He's pretty cool. Is it wrong that I want my friend to keep dating him (they were on their third date when I ran into them at the bar) in large part because of the MLP thing?
posted by klangklangston at 8:23 AM on February 1, 2008

You forgot what you meant when you read what you said
And you always knew you were tired, but then
Where are your friends tonight?
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 8:26 AM on February 1, 2008

What does "in the past few months" have to do with saving for retirement?

It applies if you have completely unreasonable expectations about market returns.
posted by yerfatma at 8:34 AM on February 1, 2008

ND¢,

What does it cost if I want you to send me a birthday card? How much for you to accept phone calls in the middle of the night to listen to my drunken confessions?
posted by lukemeister at 9:14 AM on February 1, 2008

You. Are. All. My. Friends.

Checking my Flickr contact list again.....
posted by pjern at 9:27 AM on February 1, 2008

When I was young, my older older sister and I would taunt my younger older sister by singing this:

My Little Pony
My Little Pony
I love the way
That you fart in the air

God, that drove her nuts.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:28 AM on February 1, 2008

That My Little Pony trolling link is the most awesome thing I've seen in a while. So very wrong, but so very awesome.
posted by Tehanu at 9:40 AM on February 1, 2008

With friends like you, who needs enemies?
posted by Dave Faris at 9:54 AM on February 1, 2008

My friendship rates are calculated on a sliding scale based on how terrible a person you are, and therefore how onerous it would be to be friends with you. My standard Mefite rate is $10,000 for any contact of any kind.
posted by ND¢ at 9:58 AM on February 1, 2008

We need you, Metafilter. You're our best and only friend.
posted by never used baby shoes at 10:16 AM on February 1, 2008

That's actually a quite competitive day rate for the contact I prefer.
posted by yerfatma at 10:16 AM on February 1, 2008

You. Are. All. My. Friends.

Even me?
posted by Señor Grumpus at 11:04 AM on February 1, 2008

Scott Adams needs to come to a meetup.

I know you're reading this, Adams, you egogooglewanker.
posted by Eideteker at 11:31 AM on February 1, 2008

I'm jessamyn's friend! : D
posted by Phire at 12:07 PM on February 1, 2008

I brought up Jessamyn at work as a "celebrity librarian" when we were discussing why being a librarian is a cool profession now.

That means I am friends with a celebrity!

Isn't that the new American dream?
posted by Gucky at 12:10 PM on February 1, 2008

With friends like you, who needs enemas?
posted by ottereroticist at 12:18 PM on February 1, 2008 [1 favorite]

Even me?

Especially you. Didn't I name you?
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 12:32 PM on February 1, 2008

Klangklangston, please ask your Hasbro friend if My Lil' Pony was inspired by Prince or vice versa.

I look at Prince.

I look at My Lil' Pony.

It's like the chicken or the egg, except fabulously purple and glittery.

My Lil' Princey?
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 1:52 PM on February 1, 2008

>>Especially you.

Oh, my!
posted by timeistight at 2:16 PM on February 1, 2008

Jessamyn sent me a friendship bracelet she made herself out of SIX different colors of embroidery floss! I haven't taken it off in three whole months.

You guys didn't get your bracelets?
posted by Metroid Baby at 3:33 PM on February 1, 2008

It applies if you have completely unreasonable expectations about market returns.

Whoa. What did wflanagan do? Invest in the market, or in his/her house?

Also: Loved the MLP link.
posted by A dead Quaker at 5:46 PM on February 1, 2008

(I have a modded MLP. I got it off ebay! It has a tattoo on its rump instead of something dumb and cutsey. You know, as opposed to dumb and awesome.)
posted by ambilevous at 9:03 PM on February 1, 2008

You. Are. All. My. Friends.

I'll expect you bright and early the next time I move.
posted by Devils Slide at 12:25 AM on February 2, 2008

Sometimes I wish Homer Simpson would kick Dilbert in the nuts.
posted by Skygazer at 1:42 AM on February 2, 2008

I'll expect you bright and early the next time I move.

A friend will help you move. A GOOD friend will help you move...a body.
posted by Sparx at 5:16 AM on February 2, 2008

An online friend I met through ICQ many years ago is one of the most rabid MLP collectors you'd ever want to know. She's in her mid twenties, been collecting since she was 4 or 5, has had an article written about her collection in the local papers.

I'd love to forward that link to her but for all I know she *is* Princess Biscuit.
posted by JaredSeth at 7:44 AM on February 2, 2008

That forum is almost certainly fake, so I wouldn't worry too much, JaredSeth.
posted by feloniousmonk at 4:20 PM on February 2, 2008