Wherefore art thou mdn? July 7, 2008 11:57 AM   Subscribe

Does anyone know whether mdn left or is just taking a break? Or why? I was just clicking through some favorites and noticed her account has been closed since June. There is no way left to contact her directly on her user page, and I can't remember how to find her website.

Feel free to close this if it's inappropriate. I couldn't figure anything out from her last comments and wonder if she said anything to anyone, especially the New York folks. I really appreciated her contributions here.

Finally: if someone chooses to leave the site, would it be possible to give them the option of leaving a contact email on their user page, so that, if they choose, they could allow members to have a means of contacting them after they close their account?
posted by onlyconnect to Feature Requests at 11:57 AM (41 comments total)

No clue why she left, we admins felt the same and were sorry to see her go and it just came out of nowhere. Her blog is here, in case you want to contact her through that.

Finally: if someone chooses to leave the site, would it be possible to give them the option of leaving a contact email on their user page, so that, if they choose, they could allow members to have a means of contacting them after they close their account?

I tend to think very few (if any) people would choose that option, which would leave us head-scratching all the same. Too much pain for too little gain.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 12:05 PM on July 7, 2008 [1 favorite]


Thanks very much. Her blog notes a recent attempt to try to stay away from the internet, so maybe leaving MeFi is part of a larger effort.

Thanks again.
posted by onlyconnect at 12:21 PM on July 7, 2008


Oh damn. It's sad to see her gone. Her contributions were always welcome. Thanks for the link to her blog, mathowie, it's interesting. The essay she linked to on art is thought-provoking and her reaction to it is similar to my own (though, having seen the Eliasson show at MOMA SF and other work by him, I have to say that one has to be pretty po-faced not to find beauty there). On a more self-centered plane I wonder if she ever came across my little triple-zero user fable (on my profile page) and if so what she thought of it.
posted by Kattullus at 12:35 PM on July 7, 2008


I think if we let people leave a contact email address we'd find a lot of people with addresses like seeyouinhell@fucke.rs so I don't think it's something we're likely to do. It's very easy to set up a space on the web where you can be findable and where you can link your MeFi username and your real life/internet names. Since mdn didn't leave any personal information on her profile page, a safe assumption may be that she doesn't want these things linked. I'd love to see mdn back at some point and I suspect we may.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 1:19 PM on July 7, 2008


Thanks for the updated link to the blog, matt! The old site was taken over by Coke and I was rather concerned...there had been times when she'd mentioned on her member page that she was taking a break from mefi, but this is the first time she's disabled her account. I met her two years ago at a meetup, but that was not an easy night for me.
posted by brujita at 1:20 PM on July 7, 2008


...for other reasons.
posted by brujita at 1:21 PM on July 7, 2008


seeyouinhell@fucke.rs

I would have preferred for my email to remain private.
posted by found missing at 2:11 PM on July 7, 2008 [12 favorites]


She's probably living high on the hog with her Coke money.
posted by dhammond at 2:18 PM on July 7, 2008


I would have preferred for my email to remain private.

Dammit, so YOU'RE the reason I had to go with itoowillseeyouinhell@fucke.rs ?
posted by cortex (staff) at 2:27 PM on July 7, 2008 [6 favorites]


Since mdn didn't leave any personal information on her profile page

But that's the thing. Before the account was closed, she listed her website on her user page. Once her account was closed, however, as with any account closure, all personal information (website, email, whatever) was wiped from the user profile.

In this case, because Matt listed mdn's website here I was able to have a respectful "I will really miss you" conversation with mdn (who may be back someday, possibly) in the comments on her website. But for other users who leave (and don't have Metatalk threads started about them), unless you have a good memory or are kind of a stalker with bookmarks, you kind of can't find them. Maybe that's okay, maybe that's what most folks want. To me, when people don't leave the site on bad terms or in a flameout or whatever, it seems a shame to lose all links to them. I guess I'm not sure why personal information like an email or website address has to get wiped from the profile when the account is closed, except that creating the code that might allow it to remain as an optional user choice would be onerous. (Which is a valid reason.)
posted by onlyconnect at 3:02 PM on July 7, 2008


God damn it. Now I know why ifyouregoingtoseemeinhelltheniwillsurelyseeyoutheretoo@fucker.rs was the only address available to me.
posted by Astro Zombie at 3:04 PM on July 7, 2008 [1 favorite]


I was able to grab "seeyouinhell@cocksucke.rs"

Can you appraise my email address for me?
posted by maxwelton at 3:19 PM on July 7, 2008


sure, my appraisal is that it seems cocksuckerist
posted by found missing at 3:36 PM on July 7, 2008 [1 favorite]


I guess I'm not sure why personal information like an email or website address has to get wiped from the profile when the account is closed

Our thinking was that you can't edit that info anymore so removing it was probably better than leaving it and having it be there uneditable. I can't imagine anything worse than having to email the admin of a site that either banned you or that you were banned from to tell them that your website address had changed or you wanted it removed. Also we've had a few users who have left their user pages in a state of "fuck you metafilter" which was one of the other reasons we did it that way. I tend to email people who have email addresses listed [as opposed to MeMail] and so I have some sort of record of them and their offline lives. But our general thinking is, removing yourself from the community is removing yourself. If you don't wan tto do that, you can simply step away from the keyboard and leave a "gone fishing" note on your profile page.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 4:06 PM on July 7, 2008


I can't imagine anything worse than having to email the admin of a site that either banned you or that you were banned from to tell them that your website address had changed or you wanted it removed.

What about being electrocuted?
posted by drjimmy11 at 4:24 PM on July 7, 2008 [1 favorite]


Or a fractured testicle?
posted by netbros at 4:30 PM on July 7, 2008


How about wanting some carrot cake but knowing it's a whole bus ride away?

By the way, Fuzzbean makes amazing carrot cake.

And I want it bad!
posted by klangklangston at 5:28 PM on July 7, 2008


Pole-vault accident?
posted by rodgerd at 5:55 PM on July 7, 2008


Ever got sunscreen in your eye? That's something else, let me tell you.
posted by popechunk at 5:56 PM on July 7, 2008 [1 favorite]


No, but I did manage to get a shot of Seagrams 7 in there once.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 6:06 PM on July 7, 2008


Also, do most people think "wherefore" means "where?" Wherefore the fuck?
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 6:08 PM on July 7, 2008 [1 favorite]


If you don't wan tto do that, you can simply step away from the keyboard and leave a "gone fishing" note on your profile page.

What if someone left a "fuck you metafilter" note instead? Would the mods disable the account?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:09 PM on July 7, 2008


Wherefore art thou Romeo? Is thou not up in thine crib?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:34 PM on July 7, 2008


I met mdn at the first NYC meetup about a billion years ago. She's good people and smart as a whip, too. She's missed.
posted by jonmc at 7:14 PM on July 7, 2008


But for other users who leave (and don't have Metatalk threads started about them), unless you have a good memory or are kind of a stalker with bookmarks, you kind of can't find them. Maybe that's okay, maybe that's what most folks want. To me, when people don't leave the site on bad terms or in a flameout or whatever, it seems a shame to lose all links to them.

This is a good point, but I believe that this is part of modern etiquette that is still under development. We just have no mechanism for keeping track of everyone when they're shuttling between jobs, have multiple email addresses, multiple forum and networking accounts, not to mention temporary cell phones and land lines that only connect to modems.

Additionally, society is very, very slow to understand that online communities are real communities, and that, you know, people might actually miss us if we silently skip town. I've had experiences where I resorted to looking in the obits after someone disappeared (although in those cases we had reason to worry).

I really wish people would learn to send exit notes to their contacts, or a mod, or someone central. You know, "Hi, I'm being shipped out with the Peace Corps. If you need to reach me, I'll be in Tanzania. It's true I mentioned that I had multiple doctor's appointments last month, but that was just about my vaccinations. I'm not dying or anything, so don't panic and call my mother. Love, Pete."
posted by zennie at 7:58 PM on July 7, 2008


Hi, I'm being shipped out with the Peace Corps.

That's freaky. I happen to know that there is a MeFite who has joined the Peace Corps. She's in Georgia. The former Soviet Republic, not the state with Atlanta in it.
posted by jonmc at 8:14 PM on July 7, 2008


I was just about to say
I suppose a "pause" button is out of the question?
when I realized you could just log out, and then make a determined effort not to log in again.
posted by Deathalicious at 8:58 PM on July 7, 2008


Not that I've ever succeeded.

"Yes, hon. I am coming to bed right away." Dammit
posted by Deathalicious at 8:59 PM on July 7, 2008


There could be separate options for "I'm taking a break" and "Fuck you all".
posted by graventy at 10:13 PM on July 7, 2008 [1 favorite]


Sad to see that she's gone. I've long thought she was the best poster on the site, proof positive that filtering the content according to favorites (read 'validations') was a poor idea.

Snark to signal ratio going up.
posted by BigSky at 11:42 PM on July 7, 2008


Additionally, society is very, very slow to understand that online communities are real communities, and that, you know, people might actually miss us if we silently skip town.

Yeah, the CEO of an old Eve corp had to drop out because his life got very busy with more important stuff[1], one of the other guys ended up dropping by his place in the States to make sure he was OK. One one level, I guess it sounds weird. On another level, you spend a bunch of time "hanging out" with people, you care about them.

[1] I only play MMORPGs with people who understand that, yes, a baby who's upset because she's teething and her mouth hurts and she wants daddy cuddles is more important than whatever we're doing with our internet spaceships at any given time.
posted by rodgerd at 1:19 AM on July 8, 2008


rodgerd: is your corp recruiting?
posted by BitterOldPunk at 10:06 AM on July 8, 2008


I've long thought she was the best poster on the site, proof positive that filtering the content according to favorites (read 'validations') was a poor idea.

Yeah, I agree with you.

mdn writes in paragraphs and constructs actual arguments defending her position.

Very old-school, that.

It's also not a posting style that draws a whole lot of favorites.
posted by jason's_planet at 10:07 AM on July 8, 2008


This upsets me. mdn was wise and one of the best posters here.
posted by painquale at 11:49 AM on July 8, 2008


proof positive that filtering the content according to favorites (read 'validations') was a poor idea.

I've wondered about mdn's low favorite:comment ratio before. I think a large part of the reason for it is that she was most active before favorites existed.
posted by painquale at 11:55 AM on July 8, 2008


As I said before, I've met mdn in person a time or three (and run into her on the street once or twice), and while she's just as erudite in person, she's also very laid-back and friendly, too. She had a gift that very few (maybe ten) Mefites have, she could discourse on complicated, far-flung topics and ideas and still be comprehensible to a lay-person without being condescending.
posted by jonmc at 4:38 PM on July 8, 2008


She had a gift that very few (maybe ten) Mefites have, she could discourse on complicated, far-flung topics and ideas and still be comprehensible to a lay-person without being condescending.

Ten? Out of 70,000?

I'm sure mdn is a wonderful person, but that's a ridiculous statement.
posted by gtr at 5:19 PM on July 8, 2008


gtr, I'd honestly say that there are roughly that number who can consistently do what I decscribed. Or at least have displayed that ability here.
posted by jonmc at 5:24 PM on July 8, 2008


jessamyn writes "I think if we let people leave a contact email address we'd find a lot of people with addresses like seeyouinhell@fucke"

Why are you assuming everyone would leave my email address?
posted by orthogonality at 5:38 PM on July 8, 2008


I'd honestly say that there are roughly that number who can consistently do what I decscribed. Or at least have displayed that ability here.

A large percentage of metafilter's membership never comments; that was my point. If you change it to those that have posted, well, ok, but with the thousands upon thousands of comments and members that have only made a few remarks you're a better man than I to be able to make such a statement with any degree of confidence.
posted by gtr at 11:03 PM on July 8, 2008


A large percentage of metafilter's membership never comments; that was my point.

So does a large percentage of the planet Pluto. Let's not argue semantics, my original point about mdn's abilities and the rareness of their display here stands.
posted by jonmc at 8:14 PM on July 9, 2008


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