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July 8, 2009 9:52 PM   Subscribe

Stop the stupid font trick, please.

I'm asking nicely. Stop the stupid font thing. Please. Please?

I get it. What fun. Yay! Fucking yay! It looks like this to those who can't see it. Yawn yawn yawn.

It may seem clever to you, but to the other 99.9% of people (and the people on Macs) it is not only annoying, it stupid and annoying. So please stop.

Thanks.

I swear I will make this a pony request if I have to (PB can stop these, right?). Don't make me hate every one of you font meme geeks.

There's been way too many comments asking, "Huh? Wtf?" in the gray and blue, and even an askme (and the askme inexplicably stood even though it obviously belongs here, not there, but that's another complaint).

Anyway, please stop the dumb font stupidity. Every time anyone uses this trick someone says, "Huh?" someone explains it, and someone complains. These comments are what I think people should flag as noise, since they're distracting to whatever thread they are in, and the font thing is an obvious display error (since so few can see it), so I encourage people to flag these comments as such. So enough already. Stop!

It's distracting, juvenile, and did I mention annoying?

Or maybe I'm upset because I just rubbed one off the wrong way.

Snark away.
posted by cjorgensen to Etiquette/Policy at 9:52 PM (144 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite

we've been deleting them when we see them, just flag them.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:53 PM on July 8, 2009 [5 favorites]


Thanks.
posted by five fresh fish at 10:00 PM on July 8, 2009


oh, is that what all those endless blank boxes are supposed to look like?
posted by UbuRoivas at 10:12 PM on July 8, 2009 [2 favorites]


>(({°>
posted by Effigy2000 at 10:12 PM on July 8, 2009


although, now i'm more curious to find out what "just rubbed one off the wrong way" means.
posted by UbuRoivas at 10:14 PM on July 8, 2009 [5 favorites]


thank god. and jessamyn. (probably cortex and matt too)
posted by boo_radley at 10:14 PM on July 8, 2009


(does it involve using sandpaper?)
posted by UbuRoivas at 10:15 PM on July 8, 2009 [1 favorite]


Please, for the love of kittens, do not explain what "just rubbed one off the wrong way" means.
posted by five fresh fish at 10:17 PM on July 8, 2009 [5 favorites]


    Stop the         ___.-~"~-._   __....__
    stupid         .'    `    \ ~"~        ``-.
     font         /` _      )  `\              `\
    tricks!  \   /`  a)    /     |               `\
                :`        /      |                 \
           <>

posted by Krrrlson at 10:18 PM on July 8, 2009 [2 favorites]


Ah, nuts. Now I'm too demotivated to fix it.
posted by Krrrlson at 10:18 PM on July 8, 2009


Thanks, mods (jessamyn). I thought maybe it was just me. I was fully will to live with, live with it. Glad I am not off the deep end here.
posted by cjorgensen at 10:21 PM on July 8, 2009


I'm thinking Zalgo is humming to itself, cleaning a tentacle, while cjorgensen stares at the ceiling contemplating the baleful horror of what he has done.
posted by fleacircus at 10:21 PM on July 8, 2009


it's quite possible that it involves love of kittens, if you know what i'm sayin'
posted by UbuRoivas at 10:21 PM on July 8, 2009


little boxes
on the website
little boxes
of nyarlathotep

little boxes
on the website
little boxes
made of pain

posted by cortex (staff) at 10:22 PM on July 8, 2009 [44 favorites]


there's a pink one and a green one
and a blue one and a color out of space one
and they're all requiring firefoxy
and some think they're fuckin' lame
posted by fleacircus at 10:32 PM on July 8, 2009 [5 favorites]


I would not, could not, in a box.
I could not, would not, with a osx.
posted by tellurian at 10:33 PM on July 8, 2009 [21 favorites]


Or people could just go crazy with them. We could have whole threads with people just doing the font thing.

Wait a second...we already have that?

We're more like 4chan every day.
posted by P.o.B. at 10:37 PM on July 8, 2009 [1 favorite]


we've been deleting them when we see them, just flag them.

Would have been nice if we'd been told.

I wonder what the next thing we aren't allowed to say lest we offend cjorgensen's delicate sensibilities will be.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 10:44 PM on July 8, 2009 [4 favorites]


jessamyn: we've been deleting them when we see them, just flag them.

The Zalgo thread is safe though, right?
posted by Kattullus at 10:46 PM on July 8, 2009


When my mom came to visit she arranged my alphanumeric fridge magnets to say, among other things:

MOM WUZ HERE
CALL ME
POD % 449
JAKE SUCK5
G3T LAID
FUCK
FUZZTOP (or possibly F U ZZTOP? Still puzzling over this part)

To be fair my sister may have been responsible for "FUCK", but I still can't figure out who Jake is.
posted by little e at 10:47 PM on July 8, 2009 [10 favorites]


btw, if anyone construes this as a call out, I want it know it's aimed at Astro Zombie. You know, because at this point, I could name anyone. I have no idea if he's ever done the font thing, but if I want anyone to be mad at me, it's him, since I am so planning on sleeping on his round bed when I go to the Tori Amos concert.
posted by cjorgensen at 10:51 PM on July 8, 2009 [1 favorite]


 ▲
▲ ▲
posted by turgid dahlia at 10:51 PM on July 8, 2009 [17 favorites]


" the next thing we aren't allowed to say "

I think that's overstating it a tiny bit, isn't it? Filling the comment field with a bunch of fucking boxes isn't really, y'know, exercising your speech rights in any significant way is it? It's just being a dick.
posted by majick at 10:54 PM on July 8, 2009 [12 favorites]


The only time I found it somewhat amusing was the very first time I saw it, and even then it was a fleeting moment. Then I just regarded the ones to follow in the same category as the stupid poke feature on Facebook. Childish and annoying, but doesn't get my blood boiling.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 10:57 PM on July 8, 2009 [1 favorite]


... just flag them

But none of the flag options are ZALGO.
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 10:57 PM on July 8, 2009 [12 favorites]


Sorry, but I can't find the AskMe post you're talking about, and since there ain't no link, I reckon this is as good a place as any to ask:

What's it supposed to look like?

Me and my Mac thought it was supposed to look like bizarre gibberish, which is pretty much what your like this link looks like to me.

Cue comment.
posted by solipsophistocracy at 11:21 PM on July 8, 2009


Yeah, what IS it supposed to look like? Since apparently I can't see it because on my screen it looks like what you posted.

Screenshot please, don't make me install a new font.
posted by IndigoRain at 11:33 PM on July 8, 2009


The "like this" is what it's supposed to look like. cjorgensen was illustrating for people who couldn't see it.
posted by delmoi at 11:42 PM on July 8, 2009


I SIGNED THE TREATY OF WESTPHALIA AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS STUPID FONT TRICK

AND THIS T-SHIRT
posted by GuyZero at 12:07 AM on July 9, 2009 [1 favorite]


Hoping to get on David Letterman with stupid font trick.
posted by Cranberry at 12:25 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


On a positive note, the 'stupid font trick' has helped a few people install vital Unicode-glyph-containing fonts. Honestly, you never know when you're going to need these kinds of diacritics.

Suppose someone were to load up some page containing Tibetan, but all they saw were boxes. Thanks to Z҉A҉L҉G҉O̚̕̚, they might say "hey, what is this awesome script?? I so totally need to learn this crazy language!!" [note double punctuation for emphasis]. Then he or she helps lead Tibet to freedom, etc.

just sayin, etc
posted by Maximian at 1:06 AM on July 9, 2009 [4 favorites]


It may seem clever to you, but to the other 99.9% of people
you have no way of knowing that and you alone do not make up 99.9% of users of this site. get off my lawn.

It's distracting, juvenile,
opinion, not fact. get off my lawn.

oh yeah, get off my lawn.
posted by krautland at 1:06 AM on July 9, 2009 [11 favorites]


Huh. Put me down for another "I just see boxes, what the hell."

How are people doing it, anyway? Some sort of Unicode trick? I assume if that's the case, that the people seeing boxes just don't have a font with the requisite glyphs?
posted by Kadin2048 at 1:07 AM on July 9, 2009


How are people doing it, anyway?

If you follow the second link in the post, there's a "Zalgo text generator". The basic M.O. is adding tons of diacritics to the text, which the browser renders as weird-looking stacks of overlapping junk. I can't imagine anyone doing this by hand.

I assume if that's the case, that the people seeing boxes just don't have a font with the requisite glyphs?

Generally speaking, yes. Though I suspect Zalgo is different for everyone.
posted by Maximian at 1:11 AM on July 9, 2009


For me, it looks like some Asian font, but in my American ignorance, I don't know which one.

For what it's worth, I don't think it's Chinese, although there are so many Chinese dialects, I'm not even really sure about that. My husband and I have been watching Season 1 X-files online with Chinese subtitles (also, dialect unknown) for the past few nights, and I think I might recognize the characters.

Sometimes, in the jokey threads, there are words buried in them that I have to parse, but I usually don't bother. I don't have all vertical stuff shown in the screenshot when I see it, regardless. And, also. ;) Should I run for a government position?
posted by lilywing13 at 1:49 AM on July 9, 2009


Zalgo is pleased.
posted by Avenger at 1:56 AM on July 9, 2009


For me, it looks like some Asian font, but in my American ignorance, I don't know which one.

As Maximian explained, the text generator just adds a bunch of "combining diacritical marks" to the text, and leaves it to your web browser to mess things up in various ways.

It could be viewed as a form of XSS, even if I'm not aware of any rendering engine vulnerabilities at this time. Website designers might consider using aggressive normalization (convert to NFC, nuke remaining combining marks) to get rid of this.
posted by effbot at 2:43 AM on July 9, 2009 [1 favorite]


and the people on Macs

This tips me into the "loving Zalgo" camp.
posted by rodgerd at 3:07 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


What about when that stupid font trick is pretty much the best approximation to verbal speech that can be made? In the neurosecurity thread, I wanted to indicate a segfault in an implanted device, which by rights should (or at least could) have a person making sounds that, well, most humans don't. The alternative is me banging on my keyboard and switching input languages to get the whole range of vocalized sounds, but if I start using Inuktitut, you're gonna get a bunch of boxes anyways.
posted by Lemurrhea at 4:34 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


Finally getting to see it is kind of disappointing because I was imagining that it looked much more tentacular.
posted by XMLicious at 4:43 AM on July 9, 2009


and the people on Macs

This tips me into the "loving Zalgo" camp.


meh, either way. all i see are boxes on IE6.x on XP at work, and boxes on firefox 3.x on OSX at home.

either way, it's a whole bunch of annoying fucking bullshit.
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:44 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


boxes in safari, too.
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:47 AM on July 9, 2009


You know what's an awesome strategy for making memes go away? Making new posts about them.

Z҉A҉L҉G҉O̚̕̚,Z҉A҉L҉G҉O̚̕̚,Z҉A҉L҉G҉O̚̕̚,Z҉A҉L҉G҉O̚̕̚,Z҉A҉L҉G҉O̚̕̚,

Oh god! The boxes! What will I do?!?!?!?!
posted by SpiffyRob at 4:56 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


I'm just surprised it took this long for Zalgo to hit Mefi. What next, an angry German kid smashing a keyboard? Replacing supposed desirable links with a video of Rick Astley? Ooh, maybe anybody's drawn creation in a five frame animation dancing to sped-up Swedish electro-dance music. Please not Caramelldansen, I don't want to make an ass of myself in public yet again.

Okay, that is a lie, I TOTALLY want to make an ass out of myself in public again.
posted by Saydur at 4:59 AM on July 9, 2009


I wonder what the next thing we aren't allowed to say lest we offend cjorgensen's delicate sensibilities will be.

I was so glad when Metafilter started allowing signups again, which allowed me to register and post. But now i want the old Metafilter back. You can keep my 5$. Just clear all this garbage please!
posted by CautionToTheWind at 5:06 AM on July 9, 2009


Boxes.
Things that a Mac can't read?
Lol.
So 1994.
Atemporality alert.
posted by bru at 5:24 AM on July 9, 2009


Oh god! The boxes! What will I do?!?!?!?!

flagged as noise.
posted by UbuRoivas at 5:45 AM on July 9, 2009


I AM OUTRAGED AND WILL USE FONTS AS I SEE FIT

I have no idea what this thread is about.
posted by Astro Zombie at 5:50 AM on July 9, 2009 [6 favorites]


flagged as noise.

Flagged as noise.
posted by fleacircus at 6:16 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


But now i want the old Metafilter back.

Yes, because our discourse has fallen so far from days of yore.
posted by elfgirl at 6:18 AM on July 9, 2009 [4 favorites]


I was counting down to when we'd have a whining callout on this subject from the instant I saw Zalgo appear on the blue. Took longer than I expected!
posted by kittens for breakfast at 6:22 AM on July 9, 2009


well, everybody was too busy looking at tennis skirt photos.
posted by UbuRoivas at 6:24 AM on July 9, 2009


Wait a minute, we had tennis skirt photos?
posted by kittens for breakfast at 6:27 AM on July 9, 2009


99.9% of people

Hyperbole much?
posted by blue_beetle at 6:42 AM on July 9, 2009



Ḫ͚̩̤̠͎͖̱͖̘̻̬̬̞͛̈́̃̎̍͆͋̉̓E̞̖̻͈̙͎ͯ̾́̍̎͛̆̈̔͋ͩ̓̓̊ͮͮ̚ ͖̹̦̤͕̳͖̗̰̼̠̜̱͔͖̗̺̆͊̎ͭ̍͋͋̉ͮ͂̒L̘͖͍͙̩̪ͫ̒ͫ͊͐̃̔ͥ͆ͧͬÈ͍̙̭̹̩̘̭̜̺̬̺̏̌̓̈́͐̄͐Ǎ̹̹̪̝͓͎͕ͥ̋͌̓̄̑̽̾̃̇ͬV͎̩̞̦͍̊͛̋ͪ͛ͧ̈ͬͪ͒̿͂̒͑ͮ̃̈E̮̻͋̽͊ͥ̿ͧ̈́ͥ̂͆̈̀͗ͨ̓ͭ͊̂͑ͅͅS̭͎̗͚ͧ̆͂͛͛ͪ̃̊̀ͯ͆̉̌̔́ͣ̀̔
posted by logicpunk at 6:55 AM on July 9, 2009 [3 favorites]


Fuck Zalgo. Fuck Memes. Fuck people who get touchy and defensive about this.

Your injoke is retarded and nobody loves you.
posted by Afroblanco at 6:56 AM on July 9, 2009 [3 favorites]


But I love you Afroblanco, why won't you love me back? :(
posted by public at 7:11 AM on July 9, 2009


Fuck people who get touchy and defensive about this.

Yeah, really, not-touchy-and-defensive-even-a-little-bit dude.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 7:16 AM on July 9, 2009 [4 favorites]


Yeah, really, not-touchy-and-defensive-even-a-little-bit dude.

Thank you, Captain Obvious.
posted by Afroblanco at 7:18 AM on July 9, 2009


But, but, he's my internet spouse!
posted by desjardins at 7:19 AM on July 9, 2009


Afroblanco, I'm not sure what side of this debate you're on, but I do know this: I DISAGREE
posted by kittens for breakfast at 7:21 AM on July 9, 2009


Fuck Zalgo. Fuck Memes. Fuck people who get touchy and defensive about this.

I know somebody who needs to be tatered.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:25 AM on July 9, 2009


I'm anti-Zalgo and pro-hyperbole.
posted by Afroblanco at 7:28 AM on July 9, 2009


Meh. Set Zalgo On Fire.
posted by mephron at 7:32 AM on July 9, 2009


Fuck Zalgo. Fuck Memes. Fuck people who get touchy and defensive about this.

I know somebody who needs to be tatered.


The
posted by ob at 7:39 AM on July 9, 2009 [1 favorite]


Would these memes look better over a more professional background?
posted by ob at 7:40 AM on July 9, 2009


Wait, am I missing something, or is this exactly what it's supposed to look like?
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 7:47 AM on July 9, 2009


Oh god! The boxes! What will I do?!?!?!?!

These boxes, they vibrate?
posted by elfgirl at 7:48 AM on July 9, 2009


The boxes are to put the Zalgo in, silly!

-They contain the Zalgo so it is no longer a threat
-They help keep the Zalgo out of sight so it can no longer offend delicate sensibilities

SOLVED
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 7:55 AM on July 9, 2009


COLD BUSTED, rather
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 7:56 AM on July 9, 2009


Wait. I read "tatered" as "tazered" and I was okay with that but thought it a little extreme. What's being tatered?
posted by kalessin at 7:56 AM on July 9, 2009


Needs more tennis skirts.
posted by odinsdream at 7:56 AM on July 9, 2009


This page has been deleted. The deletion and move log for the page are provided below for reference.

08:04, 8 April 2009 SoWhy (talk | contribs) deleted "Zalgo" ‎ (G1: Patent nonsense, meaningless, or incomprehensible: I do not use G1 often, but this is "Content that, while apparently meaningful after a fashion, is so completely and irredeemably confused that no reasonable person can be e)
03:07, 3 April 2009 Acroterion (talk | contribs) deleted "Zalgo" ‎ (G3: Vandalism)
03:06, 3 April 2009 Acroterion (talk | contribs) deleted "Zalgo" ‎ (A1: Not enough context to identify article's subject)
03:51, 3 September 2005 Adam Bishop (talk | contribs) deleted "Zalgo" ‎ (content was: '== The End Times are upon us ==Zalgo is coming. We must be prepared.Zalgo.'''Zalgo'''== Zalgo ==' (and the only contributor was '152.121.19.17'))

posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 8:02 AM on July 9, 2009


OH NOOOOOO in the midst of all this zalgoing we missed Comic Sans Day!
posted by Metroid Baby at 8:07 AM on July 9, 2009


I SIGNED THE TREATY OF WESTPHALIA AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS STUPID FONT TRICK

AND THIS T-SHIRT


AND AN END TO THE 30 YEAR WAR

AND THE RECOGNIZED INDEPENDENCE OF TUSCANY AND PARMA

AND THIS BLACKLIGHT POSTER OF A PANTHER SITTING ON A LAMBORGHINI
posted by quin at 8:09 AM on July 9, 2009 [4 favorites]


Whatever it is, I'm against it.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:11 AM on July 9, 2009


What's being tatered?

$20, same as in town.
posted by SpiffyRob at 8:26 AM on July 9, 2009 [1 favorite]


I kinda detest the re-naming of the Sci Fi channel. It reminds me of syphilis, which would really only be okay if they acknowledged that in their ad campaigns. For example :

"The SyFy channel : now with a new, catchier name!"
"The SyFy channel : we promise, it's not just viral marketing!"
"The SyFy channel : easily transmitted, brought to you by cable providers everywhere!"
"The SyFy channel : parts of your body are falling off!"
posted by Afroblanco at 8:51 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


Today at work we placed an online order with Quiznos, and under special instructions, my coworker put 'HE COMES' Zalgo style. A little bit later, a guy from Quiznos HQ called and said that our order came out blank. I said that OK I'd just place it again, and he said "Well, don't do that yet. Let me look into it." and put me on hold for 5 minutes. When he came back, he said that he was able to work out the problem and send the order on to our local Quiznos.

Short version: Zalgo broke Quiznos.
posted by Stylus Happenstance at 8:54 AM on July 9, 2009 [11 favorites]


Stylus: little known fact, Zalgo is actually who is talking in the oven on their new creepy ad campaign.


"̥̣̓ͤ̽̄ͥ́͘P̛͕̩̪͕͓̙ͬͮ̄̂͊ͬ̊ͪṷ̶̳͇̝̱̜͎̦ͨ̃ͣͪ͞ͅt͖̝ͫ͗ ͓͎͕͐ͨ͗̇̏̃͐̃ḭ̻̠̼̻͇͔̺͑͋͆̌̈́̂̂̔t͈̼̰̜̻̲͓̝̽ͯͥ̇̾ͮ́ ̶̫͚̯͐͒̉ͮ̕ĭ̳̻̲̟͖̐ͫ̀ͮ̉ͭ̎ǹ̰͇̣͖͗͐ ͔̬͖̦̩̥̮̻̝͆̏̏̀̊̒̿͒m̺̜̮͔ͯ̿̔̆͘ę̸̟̳̮̬ͬ̍͊͝,̉͐̈́̓͏̞̹ ̷̧̗͙̝̞̺͇̞̇̅̾̾̈́̔S͎͓̭̝̗̍c̛̮̑ͮ̓͋͐̆ͫ͝o͍̥͇̞̪͚̓͛͆̎ͮ͐́t̺̺̮̔̈ṭ̸͖̥̎̈́ͫ̾.̢̤̬͖̹̐̒͆͐ͦ̂.̡̳̘̱̗͇̗̝̮̩̐̌ͪ͂ͦ̌̋ͣ͘.̡̥̙͐ͮͤ́͞"̛͕͍̜͍̻͓̳̤͔ͦ͂͋̕
posted by indiebass at 9:12 AM on July 9, 2009


STOP HAVING WRONG FUN!
posted by Artw at 9:18 AM on July 9, 2009 [16 favorites]


I don't understand what all the Mac/OSX complaints are about - renders just fine on Firefox 3.5 and a fully updated OSX 10.5 install...
posted by Ryvar at 9:21 AM on July 9, 2009


Brcause if somweone has a Mac and something doesn't work for them it automatically must be a conspiracy against all mac-kind.
posted by Artw at 9:26 AM on July 9, 2009 [1 favorite]



I know somebody who needs to be tatered spoused.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 10:25 AM on July 9 [+] [!]


There.
posted by jerseygirl at 9:26 AM on July 9, 2009


their new creepy ad campaign.

WTF? He already has a torpedo in his hand!!!
posted by Stylus Happenstance at 9:29 AM on July 9, 2009


Brcause if somweone has a Mac and something doesn't work for them it automatically must be a conspiracy against all mac-kind.

Zalgo = Macotology's Xenu???
posted by kittens for breakfast at 9:30 AM on July 9, 2009


What's being tatered?

It's precious.
posted by Pope Guilty at 9:30 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


we've been deleting them when we see them, just flag them.
Would have been nice if we'd been told. I wonder what the next thing we aren't allowed to say lest we offend cjorgensen's delicate sensibilities will be.


You need to be told that jackass stunts in the blue aren't well tolerated, let alone that jackass stunts in the blue that don't render in the majority of browsers will be deleted?

I thought you'd been around MeFi for more than a week. Huh.
posted by five fresh fish at 9:34 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


Metafilter: Your injoke is retarded and nobody loves you.
posted by octothorpe at 9:44 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


I DON'T SEE IT THIS IS JUST LIKE THOSE STUPID STEREOGRAMS AT THE FAIR DAMMIT
posted by cabingirl at 9:45 AM on July 9, 2009 [3 favorites]


Hey, a sailboat.
posted by jerseygirl at 9:50 AM on July 9, 2009 [7 favorites]


I don't really care about the boxes themselves, but the damn things cause the page to get wide and that means a horizontal scroll bar appears AND FOR THAT SOMEONE MUST PAY.
posted by Kadin2048 at 10:10 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


It's a schooner.
posted by Stylus Happenstance at 10:11 AM on July 9, 2009


You dumb bastard...
posted by quin at 10:16 AM on July 9, 2009


Your injoke is retarded and nobody loves you.
posted by Afroblanco at 6:56 AM on July 9 [2 favorites +] [!]


Aren't you the guy who made the lame joke about Sarah Palin's retarded child? And then got all pissy about it when someone called you out on it?

Maybe you're not the best authority on what is or is not an appropriate joke for MetaFilter.
posted by Atom Eyes at 10:22 AM on July 9, 2009


I thought you'd been around MeFi for more than a week. Huh.

No one's going to tell him how to post!
posted by smackfu at 10:25 AM on July 9, 2009


Aren't you the guy who made the lame joke about Sarah Palin's retarded child?

But now you're the guy who holds grudges against people and brings arguments to different threads.
posted by smackfu at 10:27 AM on July 9, 2009 [3 favorites]


what smackfu said.
posted by shmegegge at 10:41 AM on July 9, 2009


"Fuck people who get touchy and defensive about this."

Right on. Btw, are you pot, or are you kettle this time? I can't tell if you mean ppl who get touchy about Ẕ̦̖̰͓̞̝͈ͣ͋́͘A̸̤̥̬̳͇̝̙ͫͦ̎́ͬL͔͎͍̝̥̫̟͍̉ͬͯͭͤ̿ͯ́͟G̪̦̩̺̝̩̻̈́ͧ͒͐ͩ͂̉͢ͅÓ̸̝͍̟̜͉ͬ͒̒̆̑ or ppl who get touchy about ppl who get touchy about Z̼̱͑̓͛̈́̇ͦ͆̚A̧̜͎͈̋̃́̄ͫͨ̕L͕̲̈́̃͠G̜͔̩̲͔̗̅̎͂́O̫̺ͭͥ̃͛̑̊͗̍͜͜.

Either way, the most effective way to get something annoying to go away is to complain about it as loudly and whinily as possible. GUYS! MY COMPUTER DOES NOT ALLOW ME TO PARTICIPATE IN YOUR FUN! AND ANYWAY, EVEN IF I COULD, I WOULDN'T BECAUSE I BET IT'S NO EVEN ALL THAT FUN REALLY. AND YOU'RE STUPID FOR THINKING IT'S THE FUNNIEST THING EVER WHEN REALLY YOU'RE JUST GETTING YOUR KICKS BEFORE THE NEXT STUPID OLDMEME HITS MEFI! WHATEVER, YOUR FUN IS WRONG AND SHOULD STOP, BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH IT'S NOT AT MY EXPENSE, I WILL ACT ALL BUTTHURT LIKE IT IS AT MY EXPENSE BECAUSE THAT IS HOW I GET MY KICKS, FROM LAMEASS INTERNET SYMPATHY.

SO NYAH.
posted by Eideteker at 10:49 AM on July 9, 2009 [7 favorites]


Everybody: just stop being any of those guys. If you have to be a guy, be the classic wearing-the-band's-shirt-to-their-show guy, because that guy isn't doing anybody any harm and he'll probably smoke you out if you ask.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:49 AM on July 9, 2009 [7 favorites]


To be fair (and before you, too, get all butthurt, AB), I thought this comment was hilarious (but I did not favorite it because FAVORITES DO NOT WORK THAT WAY).

cj, you can get as butthurt as you want. It seems to give you joy.

Also, the Quiznos thing was funny as well.
posted by Eideteker at 10:54 AM on July 9, 2009


Everybody: just stop being any of those guys.

Yes. You should all be women.

Thx.
posted by elfgirl at 11:05 AM on July 9, 2009


A schooner is a sailboat, stupidhead.
posted by Navelgazer at 11:09 AM on July 9, 2009 [1 favorite]


Garcon means boy.
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:20 AM on July 9, 2009


> Whatever it is, I'm against it.

No matter what it is or who commenced it?
posted by the latin mouse at 11:35 AM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


"Whatever it is, I'm against it."

I would join this movement if I didn't believe in it so fully.
posted by Eideteker at 11:39 AM on July 9, 2009 [1 favorite]


i am content to be that guy.
posted by the aloha at 11:46 AM on July 9, 2009


Salsa sauce. Chicken tikka. Monsoon season. Chai tea.

Lake Tahoe.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 11:49 AM on July 9, 2009


You know who else may or may not have been related to this issue?
posted by blue_beetle at 11:58 AM on July 9, 2009


hitler?
posted by shmegegge at 12:02 PM on July 9, 2009


If you really want novel arrangements of combining characters and obscure codepoints, I recommend the following blatant self-link: unifaces.
posted by dreamyshade at 12:04 PM on July 9, 2009


that's my favorite new twitter account in quite some time, thanks dreamyshade.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 12:25 PM on July 9, 2009


Metafilter: is retarded and nobody loves you.
posted by educatedslacker at 12:37 PM on July 9, 2009


I AM OUTRAGED AT SELF-LINKING FONT SHENANIGANS!

and other stuff
posted by JeffK at 12:40 PM on July 9, 2009


Yeah, what the hell am I thinking. Zalgo is beautiful and wonderful and everyone should use it. In fact, from now on, I'm making all my posts in rot13.

Vs lbh qba'g jnag gb qrpbqr zl cbfgf, lbh pna tb gb uryy.
posted by Afroblanco at 1:01 PM on July 9, 2009 [1 favorite]


You know why I hate zalgo? Not sufficiently surreal.
posted by Meatbomb at 1:07 PM on July 9, 2009


Oh and just one other thing, I would like to put forward the resolution that the theme song for Zalgo will be the tune played at the end of the "Learn Disco Dancing" SLYT, OK?

This is important, OK?
posted by Meatbomb at 1:13 PM on July 9, 2009


DON'T TATER ME, BRO
posted by blenderfish at 1:27 PM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


Afroblanco: yby!
posted by Eideteker at 2:23 PM on July 9, 2009


It's a schooner.

It's naaht a schoonah!
posted by turgid dahlia at 4:03 PM on July 9, 2009 [1 favorite]


More SyFy slogans that refer their new name and how it makes me think of syphilis :

"Clap if you love SyFy!"
"Check your cable; you may have SyFy and not even know it!"
"Go to bed with a turned-on TV, wake up with SyFy!"
"A night in the arms of Venus leads to a lifetime on Mercury"
posted by Afroblanco at 4:45 PM on July 9, 2009 [3 favorites]


Cortex: If you have to be a guy, be the classic wearing-the-band's-shirt-to-their-show guy, because that guy isn't doing anybody any harm and he'll probably smoke you out if you ask.

Cortex speaks from experience.
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 5:28 PM on July 9, 2009


They do seem a bit annoying, but is "I'm asking nicely" suppose to be ironic or something?
posted by edgeways at 6:47 PM on July 9, 2009


I did say "thanks."
posted by cjorgensen at 7:32 PM on July 9, 2009


Dammit, this whole time I've been reading that as "Zlago".

I think I'm going to keep it that way in my head. It sounds better.
posted by lysdexic at 7:59 PM on July 9, 2009


I just assume the person has nothing useful to say, and is helping me avoid wasting my time reading it by using a font that renders it as empty boxes.

I'm probably right about this
posted by davejay at 8:59 PM on July 9, 2009 [2 favorites]


Zlago is ZALGO's eurotrashy Slavic cousin. The one who smokes Turkish cigarettes and thinks sunglasses and popped collars are the new hotness. You know what I'm talking about. Close-talker, too much body hair, and way too much confidence and hair gel.

He doesn't warp or corrupt reality so much as make it feel really, really uncomfortable. He comes and overstays his welcome, and it's really hard to get him to leave because he seems determined to hit on your 15-year-old sister. He rebuffs all efforts to tell him, "Dude, not cool."

Oh, and you know 95% of his stories are complete BS, but whatever. You don't want to alienate the friend who brought him by making a scene, but you two are going to have a serious talk later.
posted by Eideteker at 1:04 AM on July 10, 2009 [5 favorites]


Are people still browsing the web with OS specific character sets?
posted by crataegus at 1:50 AM on July 10, 2009


I was kind of surprised because I've got the Deja Vu fonts installed and their range of Unicode glyphs is quite extensive. I also do a variety of things with arcane Unicode blocks so I've got fonts for Egyptian heiroglyphics installed, for example, as well as Asian character sets and enough other languages to display almost every language edition of Wikipedia. But whatever that little Zalgo web app is doing the stuff it's generating shows up as blocks in FF3 for me.
posted by XMLicious at 2:03 AM on July 10, 2009


Hey, who gets to be in charge when all the mods are at 10th parties? Can I be in charge? Please? I'll turn on the img tag for an hour and let everyone eat dessert before dinner. You can't tell them my girlfriend is coming over though.
posted by vapidave at 2:43 AM on July 10, 2009


Does this cousin make movies by any chance?
posted by lysdexic at 5:46 AM on July 10, 2009


In rot13, no one can hear you whinge.
posted by slogger at 7:58 AM on July 10, 2009 [2 favorites]


crataegus: "Are people still browsing the web with OS specific character sets?"

It's not the character set really — all modern browsers can handle UTF-8 — but the glyphs available in the font that's being used to actually render the character set on the screen.

Basically the computer knows what the character is supposed to be (which is a big step up from the pre-Unicode, pre-UTF8 era), but lacks the appropriate glyph to display it. So it just draws a box.

From the user's perspective this is similar to what you used to see when you opened a document in the wrong character set, but it's a whole different ball of wax. Instead of trying to determine and switch to the correct charset, you need to download and install a font with the right glyphs.

In addition, there might be an issue with actually rendering stacked diacritics even if you have a font with the correct glyphs. Unicode apparently allows you to just stack as many diacritics on top of each other as you'd like (?), but some rendering engines may assume that nobody would ever want to do more than one or two, because it's stupid.

I'm pretty sure the OS X / Zalgo problem is more because of stacked diacritics not rendering than lacking glyphs, because I think it ships with some pretty decent Unicode fonts, although I'm not really sure how to test it.
posted by Kadin2048 at 1:25 PM on July 10, 2009


The iphone's rendering is more impressive than I had expected it to be.
posted by subbes at 1:33 PM on July 10, 2009


So Zlago is basically Nyarlathotep to Zalgo's Hastur?
posted by Artw at 3:55 PM on July 10, 2009 [2 favorites]


cjorgensen: It's distracting, juvenile, and did I mention annoying?

Says the guy who writes jackass letters?

I kid, I kid.
posted by dunkadunc at 4:26 PM on July 10, 2009 [1 favorite]


It was funnier when I thought people were just posting broken-character boxes.
posted by tastydonuts at 6:20 PM on July 10, 2009 [1 favorite]


ಠ_ಠ
posted by kldickson at 8:15 PM on July 10, 2009 [2 favorites]


I just read the Zalgo thread. I don't understand it. Are you going to make me havta look at 4Chan now?
posted by mippy at 7:15 AM on July 14, 2009


I just saw my lovingly hand crafted Zalgo comment deleted, and I said.. Hey! And then I found this thread. So, er, that explains it. Thanks.

HE'S STILL COMIN THO, SUCKAHZ!
posted by cavalier at 7:52 AM on July 14, 2009 [1 favorite]


Part of the problem with the Zalgo stuff is that if it doesn't work it not only creates boxes but often creates a horizontal-scroll-inducing line of boxes, which is just, heck no.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:16 AM on July 14, 2009


Aww, really? I'm sowwy MetaFilter. *puppy dog eyes*

*puppy dog eyes which in no way turn black*
*and emit tentacles*
*etc*

What's odd is I pretty much have the same XP/Firefox install at home that I do at work, and at work everything is all spindly crawly whatever, and home it's all box box box box. Peculiar. Such is the way of madness.

(Truly sorry about the potential horizontal line boxes thing, though)
posted by cavalier at 8:27 AM on July 14, 2009


It's okay, you didn't mean nothin' by it. Just wanted to be clear that insofar as that's a pretty silly thread where silly things are probable, it wasn't iron-fisted anti-silliness so much as iron-fisted anti-breakiness that nixed the big Z.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:44 AM on July 14, 2009


What's odd is I pretty much have the same XP/Firefox install at home that I do at work, and at work everything is all spindly crawly whatever, and home it's all box box box box. Peculiar. Such is the way of madness.

Such is the way of those who remain incurious as to the operation of the software they use. View|Character Encoding is your friend. Menus in general are your friend. Your technological life will appear to be much less peculiar to you once you venture into the dizzying realm of knowing the least bit about how to function within it.
posted by Hovercraft Eel at 11:49 AM on July 18, 2009


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