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Begone, tumor!
December 29, 2009 11:54 PM   Subscribe

Yay, Matt's brain is now officially (mostly) fixed! Also, he's horny again. Details are here on his blog.

*throws confetti* Mazel Tov!
posted by Asparagirl to MetaFilter-Related at 11:54 PM (205 comments total) 11 users marked this as a favorite

That is excellent news.

What is making the tumor shrink? Radiation treatments?
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 12:00 AM on December 30, 2009


No, cabergoline. Also, the hopes, prayers, and well-wishes of thousands of MeFites.
posted by Asparagirl at 12:06 AM on December 30, 2009 [3 favorites]


Whoo hoo!

Congratulations, Matt! And happy new year.
posted by mmoncur at 12:07 AM on December 30, 2009


This means good.
posted by parmanparman at 12:16 AM on December 30, 2009


Heh. When I read cabergoline on the blog post I totally thought it was someone's online handle until I read the link. Time to step way from the interweb!

Fantastic news, though. Well done, Matt's brain! We's a rootin for ya!
posted by Sparx at 12:20 AM on December 30, 2009


Me too sparx.

Lucky Matt isn't rat.

Good luck with the shrinkage, it's certainly the opposite of most spam that I get.
posted by a non e mouse at 12:24 AM on December 30, 2009


WOOHOO!!!

Incidentally, here's an absurdly adorable picture of Matt and his daughter on Christmas morning.
posted by Kattullus at 12:42 AM on December 30, 2009 [12 favorites]


He's horny again? Well!

adjusts tie
posted by davejay at 12:44 AM on December 30, 2009 [15 favorites]


Also, that picture: holy crap. THAT is how kids make life worth living, right there. I wish my kids did that after watching max and ruby. Instead, they just run around pretending to be max, speaking single words repetitively ("Dribbler!") and giggling.
posted by davejay at 12:45 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Hooray!

And yet I didn't really want to think about Beloved Leader's bathing suit area. YMMV.
posted by subbes at 1:03 AM on December 30, 2009 [2 favorites]


He's horny again?

That'll be the testosterone. You'll fuck mud on that stuff.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 1:12 AM on December 30, 2009 [6 favorites]


Wonderful news Matt! That didn't take long at all.
posted by netbros at 1:26 AM on December 30, 2009


But is he also getting strong and sustained erections? Enquiring minds want to know!
posted by Meatbomb at 1:27 AM on December 30, 2009


This news officially points the way towards a better decade to come.

Congrats, Matt!
posted by Navelgazer at 1:48 AM on December 30, 2009


MOST EXCELLENT
posted by Nattie at 2:07 AM on December 30, 2009


Hands. Touching hands. Reaching out. Touching me. Touching you. Oh, sweet Cabergoline! Good times never seemed so good. (Great news Matt!)
posted by creeky at 2:08 AM on December 30, 2009 [28 favorites]


Good on ya, Matt. It's good to be horny.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 2:12 AM on December 30, 2009


Excellent news. (Though I have no personal interest in the horniness. This is 'excellent news' in the 'wishing Matt and his loved ones all the best' kind of way.)
posted by rjs at 2:16 AM on December 30, 2009


The magic of modern medicine! Hooray!
posted by Schlimmbesserung at 2:21 AM on December 30, 2009


Fabulous news dear leader. And happy about the horny. Well, happy for you. Hope mrsmatt is equally happy... ;-) and not too appalled that the internet knows and cares about your libido.
posted by taff at 2:48 AM on December 30, 2009 [2 favorites]


Terrific news, Matt!
posted by plinth at 3:10 AM on December 30, 2009


Yay! Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 3:12 AM on December 30, 2009 [255 favorites]


Great news, Matt. Have a Happy and Increasingly Healthy New Year!
posted by planetkyoto at 3:22 AM on December 30, 2009


Yaaay! Modern medicine, you done done good. Thanks for saving my friend!
posted by Afroblanco at 3:24 AM on December 30, 2009


Seriously though, I'm giddy about the prognosis. It was never quite a death sentence but there was always what seemed like a 5% chance it could go that way with a slim chance it could go completely right.

I was always hoping for the no brain surgery option but every doctor cautioned it was rarely the case so I'm super stoked to be in that position. It feels like a new lease on life for me.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 3:27 AM on December 30, 2009 [28 favorites]


This is very good news. Happy New Year Matt!
posted by essexjan at 3:36 AM on December 30, 2009


Yay! Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.

Yeah, but no. Though I am sure you are a wonderful and tender lover.
posted by Sparx at 3:44 AM on December 30, 2009


Yay! Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.

But then you'll be just like (pick one or more)
Mark Zuckerberg
Ev Williams
Nick Denton
Kevin Rose
Drew Curtis
Every other Web Entrepreneur...

Oh, you meant that literally! Well, then, you're welcome... I mean. Aw, fuck it, congratulations on your >50% recovery!
posted by oneswellfoop at 3:57 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Fantastic news. Onwards to a bright New year, bonny lad.
posted by Abiezer at 4:18 AM on December 30, 2009


This is great news.
posted by Elmore at 4:19 AM on December 30, 2009


Great news for a scary situation, Matt.
posted by orthogonality at 4:28 AM on December 30, 2009


This feels exactly like the sun breaking through after weeks of bad weather. Wonderful!
posted by pjern at 4:42 AM on December 30, 2009


So glad to hear this news. May you continue to heal and may the wind be at your back as you pedal faster each day.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 4:49 AM on December 30, 2009


Yay, Matt! Sometimes the good guys do catch a break.
posted by Bango Skank at 4:53 AM on December 30, 2009


Congrats!
posted by DreamerFi at 4:59 AM on December 30, 2009


"Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks."

I thought you already did that when you turned images off.

ZING!

Seriously, good to have you back healthy, Matt.
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 5:07 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Hooray! Wonderful news!
posted by IndigoRain at 5:11 AM on December 30, 2009


This is great news and I'm really happy for you and your family, Matt.
posted by empyrean at 5:35 AM on December 30, 2009


Good news, Matt. congratulations to you and your family... couldn't be a better holiday gift!

Now that we're done with the schmoopy stuff, can we get a noob to flame out in order to balance the karma/zen/whatever???
posted by HuronBob at 5:40 AM on December 30, 2009


Great! What a relief!--a wonderful New Years gift for Matt and his family.
posted by applemeat at 5:44 AM on December 30, 2009


Excellent news although I'll forgo to fucking if you don't object.

(I'll assume using paragraph spacing *and* paragraph indents are another side effect treatment. ;-)
posted by i_cola at 5:44 AM on December 30, 2009


Great News! Happy New Year, Matt!
posted by pointystick at 5:45 AM on December 30, 2009


Hooray!
posted by angrycat at 5:46 AM on December 30, 2009


I am so glad for you! This is excellent news and a wonderful way to start the new year. It is also really nice to hear something like this end so well, sometimes all you hear about are the horror stories. It is shocking though that had you stayed with the first hospital it might have gone very differently. I am really glad you have found the good doctors and the right treatment, and your blogging about it might help someone else get the right treatment as well.
posted by davar at 5:49 AM on December 30, 2009


It is shocking though that had you stayed with the first hospital it might have gone very differently.

I am under the impression he's been with OHSU the whole time. There's a lot of smart cookies there.
posted by floam at 5:52 AM on December 30, 2009


Yay for Matt!

Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.

Could you favorite a few times first? I'm shy.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:14 AM on December 30, 2009 [4 favorites]


Wonderful, wonderful news! Yay!
posted by xingcat at 6:14 AM on December 30, 2009


Good news. However:

Yay! Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.

Don't go all Phineas Gage/Mahir Çağrı on us. They didn't even pop your hood.
posted by pracowity at 6:20 AM on December 30, 2009 [2 favorites]


Dear AskMe,
Recently I was told that a colleague-- someone who has the ability to fuck with my on-line experience-- was "horny again." Is there a greeting card that covers the situation? I'm at the Hallmark store, looking in the "Thank You" section but can't seem to find the appropriate card.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 6:25 AM on December 30, 2009 [3 favorites]


Also, he's horny again.

pics or stfu.
posted by Ritchie at 6:26 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Happy happy news! So thrilled at shrinking tumour and increased horniness! Life is wonderful and so is the Christmas napping photo!
posted by typewriter at 6:27 AM on December 30, 2009


mathowie: Yay! Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.

That's going to make the next Mefi Admin Hits Meetups Around the Nation tour quite interesting.
posted by MikeHarris at 6:34 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


PeterMcDermott: That'll be the testosterone. You'll fuck mud on that stuff

If you're lucky.
posted by shakespeherian at 6:36 AM on December 30, 2009


So $5, same as in town?

Awesome news - very happy to hear it!
posted by chinston at 6:40 AM on December 30, 2009


heehee! Good news and a fuck!
posted by cowbellemoo at 6:41 AM on December 30, 2009


I CALLED IT!

Err, I mean great news, glad to hear you are getting healthy Matt! I know a lot of us were pretty freaked out when we first heard about the tumor, and it's such a relief to hear that the treatment is going smoothly.
posted by burnmp3s at 6:41 AM on December 30, 2009


What good news.

The more brain tumors we can kill, the more my revenge plot against brain cancer succeeds. Thank you for doing your part.

And I am glad you are well.
posted by bunnycup at 6:41 AM on December 30, 2009 [6 favorites]


Great news. Congratulations, and happy new year!
posted by ArmyOfKittens at 6:42 AM on December 30, 2009


Brain and brain! What is brain?
posted by Wolfdog at 6:54 AM on December 30, 2009


(Also: Hoorah! Keep getting better.)
posted by Wolfdog at 6:54 AM on December 30, 2009


Death to Matt's tumor! Long live Matt! And his libido!
posted by Salvor Hardin at 7:01 AM on December 30, 2009


\(^.^)/
posted by runningwithscissors at 7:01 AM on December 30, 2009


Great news! I'm so happy for you and your family Matt.
posted by Sailormom at 7:01 AM on December 30, 2009


Excellent. It's nice to know that sometimes the better-case scenario that you sort of don't think is possible is actually the one that winds up working out for you. Mazel tov.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 7:03 AM on December 30, 2009


I'm still trying to figure out how to say "Congratulations, great news!" and "Eeeeeeeeeew, TMI!" at the same time.
posted by FelliniBlank at 7:07 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Rock and roll, Matt. That's awesome.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:09 AM on December 30, 2009


Whoa! Happy new year, indeed! (On, er, both counts.)
posted by JoanArkham at 7:10 AM on December 30, 2009


Congrats, Matt! I'll drink one for your continued health tomorrow!
posted by Harald74 at 7:12 AM on December 30, 2009


Brand New Day! Fantastic news.
posted by pb (staff) at 7:17 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


yaaay!

my brother has the same condition, and the drugs worked great for him, too. YAY BETTER LIVING THRU CHEMISTRY!
posted by rmd1023 at 7:22 AM on December 30, 2009


I couldn't be happier about this (except for the part where you fuck me). Woo Hoo!
posted by JeffK at 7:23 AM on December 30, 2009


Here comes Matt!
posted by lukemeister at 7:24 AM on December 30, 2009


Awesome! High-five your docs for us, please! Tell them your friends from the internet say thanks!!!
posted by rtha at 7:26 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


YAY!
Just plain not saying anything about the hormone thing.
posted by Drasher at 7:26 AM on December 30, 2009


Great news, and pretty awesome SCIENCE!
posted by SteveInMaine at 7:29 AM on December 30, 2009


Can we get horniness data added to the infodump?
posted by DU at 7:30 AM on December 30, 2009


That's excellent news Matt! What a great way to start the New Year!
posted by NoraCharles at 7:53 AM on December 30, 2009


Yay! Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.
Side-effects of Cabergoline may include Tiger Woodsiness. YMMV.

So glad to hear this wonderful news! Happy New Year, indeed!
posted by Heretic at 7:54 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Lovely news!
posted by seventyfour at 7:54 AM on December 30, 2009


I am both wicked stoked to hear this and putting my hands in my ears and shouting "LALALALALALLALALALALA."
posted by grapefruitmoon at 7:54 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


!!!!!!11!!!!! Woo Hoo!!!!!11!!!!!!1
posted by snsranch at 7:56 AM on December 30, 2009


Remember, you have to spouse anyone you fuck.
posted by desjardins at 7:58 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Remember, you have to spouse anyone you fuck.

Thank Jehu the reverse is not true.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 8:02 AM on December 30, 2009 [12 favorites]


MetaFilter 15th Anniversary Party, sponsored by Wet Platinum!
posted by CKmtl at 8:05 AM on December 30, 2009


Awesome! This is great news :-) Congrats, Matt!
posted by DiscourseMarker at 8:07 AM on December 30, 2009


Matt-fuckings for some, tiny American flags for others!
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:08 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Yay!

I decided to finally cough up my $5 because despite all the fightiness that I've witnessed since lurking here for more than a year, the seasonal schmoopiness and the outpouring of love and support for mathowie when he got his diagnosis convinced me that you are pretty much all nice and good people, no matter how angry you sometimes get on the internet.

Congrats, mathowie! I'm sure this decade will be even better than your last one.
posted by pecknpah at 8:09 AM on December 30, 2009 [3 favorites]


I have said this many times, and always meant it... but never so much as at this moment:

HAPPY NEW YEAR! For Matt and his loved ones, my sincerest wishes of good times to come.
posted by Elsa at 8:10 AM on December 30, 2009


Aww, that's great. Congratulations.
posted by The corpse in the library at 8:23 AM on December 30, 2009


That's great news. I'm so glad you're doing better.
posted by Optimus Chyme at 8:24 AM on December 30, 2009


Now this is what I needed to hear to start my day right, and to remind me to keep things in perspective.
posted by vito90 at 8:27 AM on December 30, 2009


Well, this is nice.
(yay!)
posted by SLC Mom at 8:29 AM on December 30, 2009


glad to hear it, no. 1!!!!!!!!!!!
posted by msconduct at 8:31 AM on December 30, 2009


PeterMcDermott: That'll be the testosterone. You'll fuck mud on that stuff

shakespeherian: If you're lucky.

Pah! That's nothing. Once on testosterone I had a threesome with abstract expressionism and the bond market. Shit'll fuck you up!
posted by Kattullus at 8:38 AM on December 30, 2009 [17 favorites]


Booyah! Good news, Matt. I am so glad that you're winning this battle. This is the best news I've heard all year. Congratulations to you and your family!!!
posted by PROD_TPSL at 8:39 AM on December 30, 2009


But is he also getting strong and sustained erections? Enquiring minds want to know!

And is he consulting physicians if they last more than four hours ?

Happy New Year, Matt, it's so good to know you are doing better.
posted by y2karl at 8:47 AM on December 30, 2009


While I agree that it is fantastic news that the tumor is shrinking, I am deeply concerned that Matt's testosterone driven efforts to sex with everyone could lead him to a dangerous state of physical exhaustion.

Remember sir, stretch beforehand, pace yourself and keep hydrated. I'd hate to think you dodged a bullet by stepping in front of a train.

Also and more specifically: Yay!
posted by quin at 8:50 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Many congratulations, that must be huge relief and a gift all in one!
posted by ob at 8:54 AM on December 30, 2009


Uplifting news!
posted by Rumple at 8:58 AM on December 30, 2009


Great news re your health!

It's awesome to finally hear some good news from one of these brain tumor episodes, for reals.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 9:02 AM on December 30, 2009


Woo hoo! Great news! Keep gettin' healthy and strong, my man!
posted by Rudy Gerner at 9:04 AM on December 30, 2009


What a relief! The best happy new year news anyone could hope for.
posted by jasper411 at 9:06 AM on December 30, 2009


GREAT news! Congrats Matt. So happy and relieved to hear this. :)
posted by zarq at 9:09 AM on December 30, 2009


So great to hear this. Go Matt!
posted by pinky at 9:33 AM on December 30, 2009


Good news, I hope things continue to go well.
posted by marxchivist at 9:48 AM on December 30, 2009


A thousand hoorays!
posted by EatTheWeak at 9:54 AM on December 30, 2009


I love it when a treatment plan comes together.

Note: This is not a simultaneous-orgasm joke.
Note note: But that was.
posted by Sidhedevil at 10:04 AM on December 30, 2009 [2 favorites]


Yay! Congratulations!
posted by lilac girl at 10:08 AM on December 30, 2009


Congratulations Matt - and well done finding a situation to say 'Some day I will fuck all of you' funnier than when being dragged by bouncers from a Whitstable nightclub.
posted by Jofus at 10:17 AM on December 30, 2009


Hooray! What wonderful news to start a new year with! Maybe it's an omen that the next decade will be better than the last? (Which I for one am heartily glad to see the end of.) Anyway, here's hoping things continue to go well for all of us!
posted by Quietgal at 10:22 AM on December 30, 2009


I'm glad to hear this, and now I'm definitely going to meet-ups!
posted by Blasdelb at 10:28 AM on December 30, 2009


YaY!

BTW...


You know who else's brain they saved???
posted by R. Mutt at 10:30 AM on December 30, 2009


So, Matt, in usernumber order? or by geography?

Maybe it's weird that all your invisible friends feel so strongly about this, but reading your post made me really happy, and a coworker just asked why I was so happy reading a webpage. I'm delighted for you, Kay and Fiona.
posted by theora55 at 10:30 AM on December 30, 2009


You know who else's brain they saved???

Einstein!
posted by Sidhedevil at 10:38 AM on December 30, 2009


Matt, maybe you can update your profile status now. Gender: male, but a total wuss
posted by theora55 at 10:45 AM on December 30, 2009


Crap! I had you picked as not making it to the New Year in the dead pool. So I'm out 20 bucks. Thanks a lot Mathowie :(
posted by vronsky at 10:46 AM on December 30, 2009


FYI, this does not mean the brain transplant drive is off.
posted by cjorgensen at 10:47 AM on December 30, 2009


!!Whoohoo!! Great news!
posted by stagewhisper at 10:53 AM on December 30, 2009


"Also, he's horny again."

Oh, good. So it's not just me.
posted by Eideteker at 10:58 AM on December 30, 2009


theora55: Matt, maybe you can update your profile status now. Gender: male, but a total wuss

Gender: stick-in-the-mud

if Matt doesn't take it I just might

it would be appropriate given that according to Facebook my religion is "poopypants"

posted by Kattullus at 10:59 AM on December 30, 2009


I am under the impression he's been with OHSU the whole time.
Sorry, I read the blog post wrong! I read "first hospital stay" as "first hospital". Regardless, I'm glad you found better doctors.
posted by davar at 11:04 AM on December 30, 2009


Oh good gravy, hooray!!!!

Glad to hear you've got your groove back, #1. Mrowr!
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:17 AM on December 30, 2009


Fantastic news—thanks for sharing it, and congratulations to you and your family.
posted by languagehat at 11:22 AM on December 30, 2009


Good news, mathowie, and happy New Year!
posted by Bummus at 11:30 AM on December 30, 2009


Well, he must be awfully horny again, because his blog is now blocked at work for me. Simmer down a little, tiger, so I can read all about it!

Seriously, huzzah! Glad to hear that all's going well.
posted by scody at 11:32 AM on December 30, 2009


And thanks, cabergoline for saving my ass.

You know what else is a semisynthetic derivative of ergot alkaloids?
posted by Sys Rq at 11:32 AM on December 30, 2009 [2 favorites]


So, Matt, in usernumber order? or by geography?

I think I'll lose either way. I really don't want sloppy 12,848ths.

Also, great news Matt. Great news.
posted by Ufez Jones at 11:32 AM on December 30, 2009


I feel much better knowing that we have a strong, virile leader. Let's hope Matt's most important part keeps working at top performance!

I meant his brain. What did you think I meant?
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:35 AM on December 30, 2009


Brand new brain, amirite?
posted by desuetude at 11:36 AM on December 30, 2009


Such fantastic news. 2009 has been a bit crap for a lot of people I care about and it's wonderful to wrap it up with something so great. Yay, mathowie!
posted by Space Kitty at 11:40 AM on December 30, 2009


Excellent news on your recovery! I have nothing funny to say.
posted by matildaben at 11:44 AM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Salutations to Matt, his brain, and all his other healthy bits. Hooray!
posted by tizzie at 11:45 AM on December 30, 2009


YAY! Congrats and Happy New Year, Matt!
posted by wiskunde at 12:09 PM on December 30, 2009


Wonderful news! Congratulations, Matt!
posted by sueinnyc at 12:10 PM on December 30, 2009


Definitely the best news I've heard in a while. Congratulations, Matt!
posted by cerebus19 at 12:14 PM on December 30, 2009


Max and Ruby are awesome. Also, congrats, great news.
posted by msalt at 12:15 PM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Aw yiss, very good news.

can i take my fucking in cash?
posted by Dandeson Coates, Sec'y at 12:17 PM on December 30, 2009


Such wonderful news! I'm so happy for you and your family, Matt. x
posted by hot soup girl at 12:17 PM on December 30, 2009


Way to go Matt! Keep on keepin' on in 2010!
posted by porn in the woods at 12:32 PM on December 30, 2009


Yay for good news! :)

can i take my fucking in cash?

I, too, would prefer the cash equivalent. It's got to be more than $20, right?
posted by amyms at 12:35 PM on December 30, 2009


The overwhelming adorableness of the Christmas nap photo just gave me a goddamn brain tumor.

What great news, Matt! Much much love to you and the whole Haughey household.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 12:37 PM on December 30, 2009


Also, a MeFi T-shirt proposal:

"WHERE'S MY FUCK, MATH OWIE?"
posted by BitterOldPunk at 12:40 PM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


You know what else is a semisynthetic derivative of ergot alkaloids?

Is it Ghostbusters 2?
posted by desjardins at 12:52 PM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Congrats, and best wishes for the New Year!
posted by beagle at 12:52 PM on December 30, 2009


I, too, would prefer the cash equivalent. It's got to be more than $20, right?

Whatever the going rate is, it's the same as in town.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 1:17 PM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Happy New Year Matt.
posted by ClanvidHorse at 1:32 PM on December 30, 2009


Hurrah!
posted by bitter-girl.com at 1:40 PM on December 30, 2009


Well done Matt and fie to the tumour. This is great news.
posted by jokeefe at 1:42 PM on December 30, 2009


Yay! Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.

This was possibly the best news I've heard in my entire life. (after "Matt's brain is now officially (mostly) fixed" and "tiny American flags for others!").
posted by the aloha at 1:50 PM on December 30, 2009


"Party" hard!
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:06 PM on December 30, 2009


Absolutely flipping brilliant news!

I'm sure I'm not the only one around here that has been checking the blog daily waiting to read something like this...
posted by badrolemodel at 2:32 PM on December 30, 2009


Wonderful news! Yay, Matt and family! What a great way to start a brand new year!

*No brain surgery and fucking all of us. Now there's something to look forward to!*
posted by Lynsey at 2:57 PM on December 30, 2009


Keep in mind mathowie stands 6′5″. I’m just going to assume everything’s proportional is what I’m saying.
posted by joeclark at 2:59 PM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Nice one, Matt. Look forward to the next 10 - for starters.
posted by Nick Verstayne at 4:36 PM on December 30, 2009


Also, he's horny again.

Fuckin' A!
posted by jonmc at 4:52 PM on December 30, 2009


Awesome news.

Keep in mind mathowie stands 6′5″. I’m just going to assume everything’s proportional is what I’m saying.

Keep in mind that a male Gorilla weights more than 300 pounds and they are hung like a mouse. Sometimes things are inversely proportional.
posted by dirty lies at 5:02 PM on December 30, 2009


Fantastic news. Yay is right!
posted by fourcheesemac at 5:06 PM on December 30, 2009


I saw this last night and did a happy dance. Yay!
posted by mogget at 5:46 PM on December 30, 2009


Dude. Yay.

(Also: Sex with Matt automatically cuts your user number in half.)
posted by mintcake! at 6:44 PM on December 30, 2009


Aw, ya big lug! That's awesome news!

*passes around the Fedora for a collection to buy condoms*
posted by deborah at 6:47 PM on December 30, 2009


Fantastic news! Woooo.
posted by defenestration at 7:07 PM on December 30, 2009


WooHOO! Happy everyholidayever to you and family!

Please remember to use a new pair of gloves each time you handle the Sex Fedora, everyone. We don't need another MeFi health crisis on our hands.
posted by hippugeek at 7:07 PM on December 30, 2009


This is terrific! I'm glad to hear it.

Brown chicken brown cow
posted by halonine at 7:13 PM on December 30, 2009


Hooray! Sex and non-death for everyone!
posted by ocherdraco at 7:26 PM on December 30, 2009


Great news, Matt!

And I nominate Aparagirl for Best Non-Ironic Use of the Word Horny in 2009.
posted by oneirodynia at 7:39 PM on December 30, 2009


Such fantastic news, and so much better than it might have been. Testosterone is a powerful drug, huh? Shots all round! Congrats, Matt. Keep healthy.
posted by Miko at 7:46 PM on December 30, 2009


Remember, you have to spouse anyone you fuck.

Thank Jehu the reverse is not true.
posted by jessamyn


It isn't? DAMN YOU, GEORGE CLOONEY!
posted by crossoverman at 7:59 PM on December 30, 2009


Death to counter-revolutionary tumors! Death to the running dogs of malignancy!

(What wonderful news, Matt. This is officially the best Christmas ever.)
posted by octobersurprise at 8:16 PM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Hope you don't mind that I just Me-married you... it makes the gratitude sex feel holy, not slutty.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 8:26 PM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


That's wonderful, Matt!
posted by brujita at 8:47 PM on December 30, 2009


MetaFilter: Sex with people we met on the Internet feels holy, not slutty.
posted by lukemeister at 8:57 PM on December 30, 2009


I can't think of a better way to end the year!
posted by jason's_planet at 9:15 PM on December 30, 2009


Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.

I'm not gay, but I'd probably be willing to do this just for bragging rights, if the correct intoxicants were involved.

I take testosterone too, and I can attest that it must be the reason that the Victorians covered table legs.

Note to wife: I'm not going to cheat on you with some dude from the internet. Seriously, he's all the way over in Oregon.
posted by double block and bleed at 11:49 PM on December 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Yay! Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.
Oh, you are so going to regret saying that after about the first 500 of us.

This is absolutely awesome news and I'm glad for you but especially for Kay, who must have been worried sick no matter how strong a front she's been putting on. Assuming new-found horniness is good news for both of you, she wins both ways.

Keep strong and keep on fighting - don't let things creep up on you again.
posted by dg at 1:19 AM on December 31, 2009


Wow. Wow. Wow.

Way to go Matt! What an auspicious beginning of this new decade.

This makes me want to go pay another $5 for a sock-puppet so I can say Wow again.
posted by Surfurrus at 3:23 AM on December 31, 2009


What an auspicious beginning of this new decade.
Them's fighting words around here ...
posted by dg at 3:38 AM on December 31, 2009


That is such wonderful news. Hurrah and Happy New Year!!!
posted by mkim at 5:08 AM on December 31, 2009


Wonderful news, Matt.

And a hearty handshake will do.
posted by orange swan at 5:46 AM on December 31, 2009


Yay, MAtt! In the future, be sure to tell your little girl that her kisses and Mommy's kisses were important parts of your recovery.

Happy new year!
posted by NortonDC at 7:37 AM on December 31, 2009


Happy new year! This is lovely news.
posted by jadepearl at 8:39 AM on December 31, 2009


Glad to hear it. :)
posted by pmurray63 at 8:51 AM on December 31, 2009


It's awesome that you avoided surgery - them holes is PERMANENT. They get patched, but your nose will never be the same. I got ice cream headaches from breathing through my nose for years after I got drilled.
posted by mountain_william at 8:55 AM on December 31, 2009


Yay! Someday, I will fuck all of you as thanks.

At once?
posted by The Whelk at 10:35 AM on December 31, 2009


At once...
posted by zennie at 10:59 AM on December 31, 2009


I am enthusiastically in favour of decreasing brain-invasion and increasing pants-invasion.

May the proportion continue to grow inversely, you big healthy-headed horndog!
posted by Pallas Athena at 11:02 AM on December 31, 2009


Does Matt's offer apply to the people who gave up in the middle of the signup process? If so, he's gonna break Wilt Chamberlin's Tiger Woods' record for sure.
posted by lukemeister at 11:13 AM on December 31, 2009


Wonderful news, and happy fucking new year.
posted by ~ at 11:18 AM on December 31, 2009


Oh, I get it. Matt wasn't offering to know us in the biblical sense. That's a relief.

He was actually making a veiled reference to the fact that Rupert Murdoch has come through with a gang of loot to buy the site.

Not so, you say? Then why has Matt never denied that Rupert Murdoch and the new mods: book_burner, cerebellum and Empty_Piñata will be controlling the site as of midnight, January 1, 2010 PST?

First change: Professional white background hip flash myspace-based web design with lots of sounds
Second change: All past anonymous questions will have their real usernames attached to them
Third change: Check your email often for special offers exclusively from Fox and Fox partners! you can opt out if you can find the right web form. happy hunting!

I am glad to hear about your brain tumor. I was worried about you. Even if you've freely admitted that you're fucking us all.
posted by double block and bleed at 12:10 PM on December 31, 2009


Them's fighting words around here ...

and what words are *not* fucking fighting words around here?
posted by Surfurrus at 12:44 PM on December 31, 2009 [1 favorite]


Incidentally, Matt's being horny again is definitely sidebar-mention worthy.
posted by orange swan at 1:26 PM on December 31, 2009 [1 favorite]


Hooray, fearless leader!
posted by vers at 2:37 PM on December 31, 2009


Sweet Cabergoline, indeed. Congratulations, Matt!!
posted by cobwebberies at 6:27 PM on December 31, 2009


Wonderful news. Congrats, Matt!
posted by angiep at 6:49 PM on December 31, 2009


Congrats!
posted by juv3nal at 3:55 AM on January 1, 2010


:)
posted by caddis at 7:50 AM on January 1, 2010


This news is beyond awesomeness. Continued good wishes to you, Matt.
posted by rangefinder 1.4 at 10:07 PM on January 1, 2010


YAYY!!! And in this case, glad to say I told you so.

What a huge relief and joy to hear this news!

Wishing you and your beloved lots of mutual lovey dovey.
*the stork may consider visiting the mathowie household again
posted by nickyskye at 12:18 AM on January 2, 2010 [1 favorite]


Woo hoo! This is great news!
posted by biscotti at 8:07 AM on January 2, 2010


Dude, this is wonderful news!

*hugs*
posted by darkstar at 12:20 AM on January 3, 2010


Woot!
posted by HabeasCorpus at 1:07 AM on January 3, 2010


Yay :)
posted by jewzilla at 8:06 AM on January 4, 2010


This news inspired a greeting card emergency worth checking out.
posted by umbú at 3:05 PM on January 5, 2010


Hooray for Matt, the horniest man in town!!
posted by Skygazer at 3:25 AM on January 7, 2010


I'm late as usual, but: Awesome news!
posted by klausness at 10:56 AM on January 9, 2010


Yeah, somehow I missed this as well-but still belated thrilled! Woohooo!
posted by miss-lapin at 3:06 PM on January 14, 2010


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