The Bat Signal is broke. March 21, 2007 8:08 AM   Subscribe

What is the protocol for contacting another member for something friendly and (admittedly) trivial if they don't have an email in their profile?
posted by sourwookie to Etiquette/Policy at 8:08 AM (48 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

You can't.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:12 AM on March 21, 2007 [1 favorite]


You don't. If they wanted to be contacted, they'd have made the address available.
posted by DU at 8:12 AM on March 21, 2007 [1 favorite]


If they are in the US, you have to wait until the next superbowl and pay for a TV ad there.
posted by micayetoca at 8:13 AM on March 21, 2007 [5 favorites]


If they have latitude/longitude you can go to that locale and just walk around shouting their username.
posted by Burhanistan at 8:14 AM on March 21, 2007 [11 favorites]


You don't. If they wanted to be contacted, they'd have made the address available.

Fair enough.

Hey DU, you mentioned in an earlier post you used to live in SW Missouri. As a native and current resident of Springfield I was just curious whereabouts.
posted by sourwookie at 8:18 AM on March 21, 2007


AskMe sounds right.
posted by and hosted from Uranus at 8:19 AM on March 21, 2007


Although you could always post a MetaTalk thread looking for contact info. It's been done before.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:20 AM on March 21, 2007 [1 favorite]


In reality... you post something here explaining why you posted here endure the snark and hope they see it. You could also check out Metachat on the off chance they hang out there. Check their contact list, perhaps someone on it has insight on how to contact them.
But most likely you are SOL
posted by edgeways at 8:20 AM on March 21, 2007


Not cool.
posted by mds35 at 8:21 AM on March 21, 2007


You can also go crazy google-style with available info and see if you can find an IM account or email address that way, but there's the small possibility you will completely fucking freak them out if you succeed, so proceed with caution.

But, in non-MacGuyver terms, yeah: if it's trivial, you just don't. C'est la vie.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:31 AM on March 21, 2007


The protocol is HTTP.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 8:31 AM on March 21, 2007 [3 favorites]


Monett. But only for a couple years, so I don't know the area well.
posted by DU at 8:32 AM on March 21, 2007


I think the way to go is, "Hey person, send me an e-mail if you're of a mind to. My address is in my profile." From personal experience, this works just fine.
posted by Mister_A at 8:33 AM on March 21, 2007


I think it is fine to mention it in the thread where you happen upon them, even if it is off topic, as Mister_A notes. I think a specific call-out to somebody on MeTa is not appropriate. Some people don't care to have attention drawn to themselves or to be easily reached, but if someone is commenting in a thread they can't reasonably expect not to be addressed.
posted by nanojath at 8:47 AM on March 21, 2007


Post a thread here accusing them of being a self-linker or something. Within 20 minutes, we'll have their mom's maiden name, their GPA, their SSN, and their ATM PIN posted in here.
posted by popechunk at 8:47 AM on March 21, 2007 [9 favorites]


of course... if this is an active person, find a thread s/he is commenting in and make a comment directly at the person asking them to contact you. (don't do this in the green, but the blue or brown should fly)
posted by edgeways at 8:47 AM on March 21, 2007


Brown? We have a UPS service now?
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 8:51 AM on March 21, 2007


Actually it's a warm gray.
posted by Mister_A at 8:52 AM on March 21, 2007


Fresh, steaming deliveries.
posted by and hosted from Uranus at 8:52 AM on March 21, 2007 [1 favorite]


You can also hope they make a post to MeTa (where there are no rules), then you can ask anything you please without consideration for politeness or tact. Like, you're supposed to be a fucking musician, sourwookie, how come you haven't posted any songs on Music. Huh? Huh?
posted by nanojath at 8:53 AM on March 21, 2007


Warm greys
posted by Mister_A at 8:53 AM on March 21, 2007


link to this person as a muse or some such and leave a message in your profile: call me, call me now... it may work.
posted by de at 9:02 AM on March 21, 2007


telepathy
posted by matteo at 9:05 AM on March 21, 2007


Except for a total emergency, mathowie cortex and I won't pass on emails to other members. It's too much of a privacy/security problem, it puts us in the middle of interactions we don't need to be involved in, and we'd like to encourage people to have at least an admin contact address which we feel they might not if we passed along messages that they possibly didn't want.

That said, there are a lot of great reasons to have an email address in your profile, even a semi-disposable one, or at least an IM handle you can occasionally be contacted at. If peopel have a blog listed in their profile, you can usually try to leave a comment there. Many members here have the same username at other sites and sometimes you can track them down that way. Just this morning I emailed a user and said I wouldn't pass on a message but I knew the user was also on LJ with the same name and might have contact information there.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:10 AM on March 21, 2007


nanojath: Good point. I'll try to correct that this week.
posted by sourwookie at 9:11 AM on March 21, 2007


Again, nanojath:

I just attempted to announce that one of my bands, The Rugs, will be playing this Saturday at Kansas City's The Hurricane, in hopes of putting the word out for a mini-meetup.

Alas, I was unaware of the one Meta post/four days rule.
posted by sourwookie at 9:17 AM on March 21, 2007


Call AT&T or Verizon. Apparently they'll give out anyones private info, even without a good reason...
posted by NotMyselfRightNow at 9:24 AM on March 21, 2007


: Hey DU, you mentioned in an earlier post you used to live in SW Missouri. As a native and current resident of Springfield I was just curious whereabouts.

You're right. That was both friendly and trivial.
posted by Terminal Verbosity at 9:42 AM on March 21, 2007


Brown? We have a UPS service now?

I've noticed that MeTa can look either brown or grey depending on the monitor. I think that might be due in part to the link color.
posted by delmoi at 9:43 AM on March 21, 2007


Term Verb FTW.
posted by sourwookie at 10:25 AM on March 21, 2007


sourwookie, can you get me on the guest list?
posted by geoff. at 10:30 AM on March 21, 2007


Although you could always post a MetaTalk thread looking for contact info. It's been done before.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero


It's been done before is hardly reason to do it again. And we wonder why people continue to make frivolous metatalk threads that are closed early. Bad advice.

I think it is fine to mention it in the thread where you happen upon them, even if it is off topic, as Mister_A notes. I think a specific call-out to somebody on MeTa is not appropriate. Some people don't care to have attention drawn to themselves or to be easily reached, but if someone is commenting in a thread they can't reasonably expect not to be addressed.
posted by nanojath


Very good advice.
posted by justgary at 10:35 AM on March 21, 2007


Or we could just have a PM service like every bare bones PHP/SQL forum package that has ever existed...

mathowie posted a mockup around six months ago, as this issue is recurring and these conversations get us nowhere...

Also, I have returned to previous AskMe threads where I mentioned a lack of e-mail in the profile and sometimes the user has set up an anonymous account at yahoo or gmail just for that purpose and I am then able to forward them information... so I'd find it laughable to imagine that's a more feasible and cohesive route for everyone to take rather than a very simple PM system...

But have fun gnashing your teeth and digging in your heels because that would most definitely ruin your experience here... we only want to talk to 50,000 other people at random in a closed system, reciprocation makes our bowels rumble with insecurity.
posted by prostyle at 10:47 AM on March 21, 2007


geoff.: I don't know. I've never played The Hurricane before, so I don't know their policy on that. Additionally, we're one of the openers, which makes it even more iffy. I'll see what I can do, but I likely won't know until I'm up there Saturday evening, with no way to contact you.
posted by sourwookie at 11:29 AM on March 21, 2007


prostyle:
That's not insecurity, it's bad Indian food. [NOT SUB-CONTINENTIST]
posted by Mister_A at 11:41 AM on March 21, 2007


little known metafilter feature:

If you make a fpp on the blue with a username as the link url, the only that user can see it. Not quite private messaging, but pretty close!
posted by empath at 11:49 AM on March 21, 2007


we only want to talk to 50,000 other people at random in a closed system

want to talk AT 50,000 other people. I want to talk AT you, not TO you. Ick.
posted by nanojath at 11:56 AM on March 21, 2007 [1 favorite]


I always just try to find a recent comment from the person I'm wishing to contact, then I call them various names, question the sexual habits of their mothers, and accuse their children of being below average.

When they respond to me, I politely ask them my question, saying "I was just trying to get your attention."
posted by drezdn at 12:13 PM on March 21, 2007


Everybody's talking at me
I can't hear a word they're saying
Only the echoes of my mind

posted by prostyle at 12:19 PM on March 21, 2007 [1 favorite]


just post in-thread asking them to contact you, or even asking your question. I think you'll find that usually you will get a response.

I just attempted to announce that one of my bands, The Rugs, will be playing this Saturday at Kansas City's The Hurricane, in hopes of putting the word out for a mini-meetup.

Alas, I was unaware of the one Meta post/four days rule.


take heart! that rule probably just saved you a MetaPylon.

posted by fishfucker at 12:22 PM on March 21, 2007


If you make a fpp on the blue with a username as the link url, the only that user can see it.

90% of me is certain you are flinging shit; 10% of me wants to see what happens when it hits the front page.
posted by sonofslim at 1:27 PM on March 21, 2007


I want to talk AT you, not TO you. Ick.

I want to talk ON you, baby.
posted by chrismear at 2:02 PM on March 21, 2007


Fresh, steaming deliveries.

Mmmm...steaming media...
posted by owhydididoit at 2:30 PM on March 21, 2007


But most likely you are SOL

No, that's me.
posted by solid-one-love at 3:32 PM on March 21, 2007


Ha!
posted by cortex (staff) at 3:56 PM on March 21, 2007


I've noticed that MeTa can look either brown or grey depending on the monitor. I think that might be due in part to the link color. Yeah that's right. That or maybe its dependent on the monitor, or perhaps the link color. Or something. Yeah.. I've noticed that as well. Also consider sunglasses? Serious.. it might be eye-wear related.
posted by econous at 5:29 PM on March 21, 2007


MetaTalk: our bowels rumble with insecurity.
posted by theora55 at 9:02 AM on March 22, 2007


prostyle writes "Or we could just have a PM service like every bare bones PHP/SQL forum package that has ever existed..."

All of which allow users to opt out of private messaging getting right back to where we started.
posted by Mitheral at 8:22 PM on March 22, 2007


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