Boobs + Cured meat /= Best of the Web April 2, 2008 9:18 PM Subscribe
A new low...the one link Flickr post.
This is actually a pony request...allow us to flag a thread for each infraction as opposed to just the most egregious. Thx.
This is actually a pony request...allow us to flag a thread for each infraction as opposed to just the most egregious. Thx.
jessamyn: bacon bra yes or no?
*cortex: i think it's meh, because, hey, I saw that two weeks ago and whatever. On the other hand, people seem to love that shit.
*cortex: Except for the XXXX-and-counting have instead flagged that shit.
jessamyn: yeah I think it's mostly good natured except for the "she's fat" and "she's ugly" comments [I paraphrase]
*cortex: yeah
jessamyn: but my quesiton is whether I'm going to wake up to it in metatalk tomorrow?
*cortex: i bet not
*cortex: i say we leave it, it'll probably be okay, and if not i owe you a coke.
jessamyn: diet coke
*cortex: deal
*cortex: Oy.
*cortex: I'll, uh, paypal you a diet coke, I guess.
jessamyn: what happened?
*cortex: metatalk
jessamyn: oh good
jessamyn: I will copy/paste this discussion
*cortex: Heh.
jessamyn: pre-emptive delete or no?
*cortex: I...
*cortex: I will delete it. With a "meh".
jessamyn: excellent compromise
*cortex: ha!
*cortex: never mind, Matt did it!
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:21 PM on April 2, 2008 [60 favorites]
*cortex: i think it's meh, because, hey, I saw that two weeks ago and whatever. On the other hand, people seem to love that shit.
*cortex: Except for the XXXX-and-counting have instead flagged that shit.
jessamyn: yeah I think it's mostly good natured except for the "she's fat" and "she's ugly" comments [I paraphrase]
*cortex: yeah
jessamyn: but my quesiton is whether I'm going to wake up to it in metatalk tomorrow?
*cortex: i bet not
*cortex: i say we leave it, it'll probably be okay, and if not i owe you a coke.
jessamyn: diet coke
*cortex: deal
*cortex: Oy.
*cortex: I'll, uh, paypal you a diet coke, I guess.
jessamyn: what happened?
*cortex: metatalk
jessamyn: oh good
jessamyn: I will copy/paste this discussion
*cortex: Heh.
jessamyn: pre-emptive delete or no?
*cortex: I...
*cortex: I will delete it. With a "meh".
jessamyn: excellent compromise
*cortex: ha!
*cortex: never mind, Matt did it!
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:21 PM on April 2, 2008 [60 favorites]
It's removed.
I saw it on a few blogs today and people seemed to be joking about it and not taking it too seriously. It's kinda goofy but I guess too farky with the whole side-boob action in those photos.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:22 PM on April 2, 2008
I saw it on a few blogs today and people seemed to be joking about it and not taking it too seriously. It's kinda goofy but I guess too farky with the whole side-boob action in those photos.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:22 PM on April 2, 2008
Seriously, the one link to Flickr thing is the problem you had with that thread? Did you even read the comments? Is there some sort of extended April Fool's day thing going on or did all the knuckle-draggers crawl out of the wood work at the same time?
posted by LeeJay at 9:24 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by LeeJay at 9:24 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
Why does this weigh 21 pounds and cost over eleven bucks?
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:24 PM on April 2, 2008 [9 favorites]
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:24 PM on April 2, 2008 [9 favorites]
Damnit!
posted by delmoi at 9:27 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by delmoi at 9:27 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
(To be clear, I was not directing my comment at you, SassHat.)
posted by LeeJay at 9:28 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by LeeJay at 9:28 PM on April 2, 2008
Did you even read the comments?
I just glossed over them, looking back, pit stubble and she's "underexercised" are pretty fucked up, yeah.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:29 PM on April 2, 2008
I just glossed over them, looking back, pit stubble and she's "underexercised" are pretty fucked up, yeah.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:29 PM on April 2, 2008
It's a bra. It's made out of bacon. Sounds more like a new high to me.
See, that's what I get when I post before really processing what I'm looking at. Raw bacon? That's just wrong. Flagged as pale, flaccid, and insufficiently delicious.
posted by dersins at 9:30 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
See, that's what I get when I post before really processing what I'm looking at. Raw bacon? That's just wrong. Flagged as pale, flaccid, and insufficiently delicious.
posted by dersins at 9:30 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
I have to say delmoi was pretty much a dick in that thread. Linking to shots of her where her face was show when it clearly said she wanted the revealing shots to be cropped is just fucking awful.
posted by piratebowling at 9:30 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by piratebowling at 9:30 PM on April 2, 2008
As much as humanly possible I would like to apologize for the profound stupidity of boys.
posted by loquacious at 9:30 PM on April 2, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by loquacious at 9:30 PM on April 2, 2008 [2 favorites]
Why does this weigh 21 pounds and cost over eleven bucks?
Whats the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?
Beer nuts are $1.49 and deer nuts are under a buck.
P.S. That post wasn't a new low. Actually kind of an old low and pretty tame at that.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 9:31 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
Whats the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?
Beer nuts are $1.49 and deer nuts are under a buck.
P.S. That post wasn't a new low. Actually kind of an old low and pretty tame at that.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 9:31 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
Well, it's not the $11 that's the problem it's the $77.86 shipping. here's a better deal.
posted by delmoi at 9:31 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by delmoi at 9:31 PM on April 2, 2008
I removed delmoi's comments fwiw, people can go look for the woman's face on her own if they want to.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:32 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:32 PM on April 2, 2008
Why does this weigh 21 pounds and cost over eleven bucks?
And 77 dollars shipping!?
There better be some real coke in that box.
posted by loquacious at 9:35 PM on April 2, 2008
And 77 dollars shipping!?
There better be some real coke in that box.
posted by loquacious at 9:35 PM on April 2, 2008
I have to say delmoi was pretty much a dick in that thread. Linking to shots of her where her face was show when it clearly said she wanted the revealing shots to be cropped is just fucking awful.
Dude, they were in the same photostream posted just a day apart, anyone who looked at more of his photos would have seen them.
posted by delmoi at 9:36 PM on April 2, 2008
Dude, they were in the same photostream posted just a day apart, anyone who looked at more of his photos would have seen them.
posted by delmoi at 9:36 PM on April 2, 2008
Thanks for that, jessamyn, and sorry for that outburst. It just really pissed me off and I didn't have a chance to vent in the original thread.
posted by piratebowling at 9:36 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by piratebowling at 9:36 PM on April 2, 2008
It deserved to be nuked, mathowie, it had no artistic value and was old.
Unlike, Jana Sterbak's flesh dress, who did it 17 years ago.
Copycats. Judging from the numerous borched links in the comments, some were born that long ago.
posted by alicesshoe at 9:38 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
Unlike, Jana Sterbak's flesh dress, who did it 17 years ago.
Copycats. Judging from the numerous borched links in the comments, some were born that long ago.
posted by alicesshoe at 9:38 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
Thanks for that, jessamyn, and sorry for that outburst. It just really pissed me off and I didn't have a chance to vent in the original thread
try to get a grip on the real horrors in life, that was, if anything, mildly annoying, not soapboxey so. Obviously a simple email to admin whould have had the same effect, w/o all the self-righteousness, breast-beating faux-distress.
posted by dawson at 9:41 PM on April 2, 2008
try to get a grip on the real horrors in life, that was, if anything, mildly annoying, not soapboxey so. Obviously a simple email to admin whould have had the same effect, w/o all the self-righteousness, breast-beating faux-distress.
posted by dawson at 9:41 PM on April 2, 2008
hojoki linked to them in a really sort of derogatory way later in the thread as well. I think it's just natural MeFi Clue Club behavior but it didn't help that thread out much.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:41 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:41 PM on April 2, 2008
self-righteousness, breast-beating faux-distress.
dawson, leave it alone please, she said she was sorry. Really, it was a meh post and was removed and this can either turn into a big shouting match or it can be a shrug and move on event. I'd prefer the latter. It's up to you guys.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:43 PM on April 2, 2008
dawson, leave it alone please, she said she was sorry. Really, it was a meh post and was removed and this can either turn into a big shouting match or it can be a shrug and move on event. I'd prefer the latter. It's up to you guys.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:43 PM on April 2, 2008
Have we had a one link twitter post yet?
YOU SHUT YOUR BIG FAT STINKING PIEHOLE MISTER FUCKHEAD GUY
posted by loquacious at 9:44 PM on April 2, 2008
YOU SHUT YOUR BIG FAT STINKING PIEHOLE MISTER FUCKHEAD GUY
posted by loquacious at 9:44 PM on April 2, 2008
This should make everyone feel a little more optimistic about humanity after bacon boobs and now bathtub burrito pudding guy.
Now that he's performed a miracle, they can officially make him a saint. I mean, after he dies.
posted by delmoi at 9:50 PM on April 2, 2008
Now that he's performed a miracle, they can officially make him a saint. I mean, after he dies.
posted by delmoi at 9:50 PM on April 2, 2008
But wait, does the mathowie action negate the owing of the diet Coke? Jessamyn, I must know if you get your diet Coke!
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 9:51 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 9:51 PM on April 2, 2008
dawson, leave it alone please
very sorry, I was out of line.
posted by dawson at 9:52 PM on April 2, 2008
very sorry, I was out of line.
posted by dawson at 9:52 PM on April 2, 2008
Mr. T -- healer, fashion consultant.
Also, more brain bleach. Awww.
posted by LeeJay at 9:53 PM on April 2, 2008
Also, more brain bleach. Awww.
posted by LeeJay at 9:53 PM on April 2, 2008
It was better than a one-link to a monkey riding a minibike, but hey.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 9:56 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 9:56 PM on April 2, 2008
The Diet Coke is still owed to me, but I may collect at some future date. Who wants a soda in the mail?
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:57 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:57 PM on April 2, 2008
Well, I wouldn't mind a soda in the mail. But only if it is the obviously superior Diet Rite. I mean, if you're gonna go diet go for the good shit.
posted by LeeJay at 10:03 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by LeeJay at 10:03 PM on April 2, 2008
I was gonna request a Double Cola, (Carolina, late 70's) thinking that was impossible, but maybe they are still made?
posted by dawson at 10:13 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by dawson at 10:13 PM on April 2, 2008
Let's not forget OK Cola with it's double reverse-ironic hipster advertising campaign.
posted by delmoi at 10:21 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by delmoi at 10:21 PM on April 2, 2008
damn, even with 5 bucks s&h that's a reasonable deal. cool of you to point that out, puke & cry.
posted by dawson at 10:23 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by dawson at 10:23 PM on April 2, 2008
Flagged as pale, flaccid, and insufficiently delicious.
Look, somebody needs to say "that's what she said," but damn if it's going to be me.
posted by ludwig_van at 10:47 PM on April 2, 2008 [3 favorites]
Look, somebody needs to say "that's what she said," but damn if it's going to be me.
posted by ludwig_van at 10:47 PM on April 2, 2008 [3 favorites]
jessamyn: I'd trade out your Diet Coke for a Dublins Dr. Pepper. Original old school, with cane sugar and everything, recipe. Available over the internet.
posted by mrzarquon at 11:03 PM on April 2, 2008
posted by mrzarquon at 11:03 PM on April 2, 2008
The Bacon Bra: Putting The Treyf In Très Fantastique Since 2008.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:15 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:15 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]
This should make everyone feel a little more optimistic about humanity after bacon boobs and now bathtub burrito pudding guy.
Man boobs are less awkward.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 11:17 PM on April 2, 2008
Man boobs are less awkward.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 11:17 PM on April 2, 2008
cortex writes "Why does this weigh 21 pounds and cost over eleven bucks?"
jessamyn writes "The Diet Coke is still owed to me, but I may collect at some future date. Who wants a soda in the mail?"
That's not how you get someone a coke (diet or otherwise) at a distance. Just phone up the local pizza place and have them deliver a coke. You'll need a CC to make it happen but it works just fine and it'll only cost you the inflated coke price and the delivery fee/tip.
posted by Mitheral at 11:19 PM on April 2, 2008
jessamyn writes "The Diet Coke is still owed to me, but I may collect at some future date. Who wants a soda in the mail?"
That's not how you get someone a coke (diet or otherwise) at a distance. Just phone up the local pizza place and have them deliver a coke. You'll need a CC to make it happen but it works just fine and it'll only cost you the inflated coke price and the delivery fee/tip.
posted by Mitheral at 11:19 PM on April 2, 2008
bathtub burrito pudding guy
Holy shit, am I glad I didn't click on that godkiller thing!
Also, Grod: today's winner of person I would most like to never hear from again.
posted by jacalata at 11:28 PM on April 2, 2008
Holy shit, am I glad I didn't click on that godkiller thing!
Also, Grod: today's winner of person I would most like to never hear from again.
posted by jacalata at 11:28 PM on April 2, 2008
You know, this really highlights why so many women have body image problems. Here, you are presented with BOOBS WRAPPED IN FRIGGIN' BACON, and all some of you could do is point out her flaws? Holy cats.
posted by DecemberBoy at 12:47 AM on April 3, 2008 [11 favorites]
posted by DecemberBoy at 12:47 AM on April 3, 2008 [11 favorites]
If for no other reason this was worthwhile so that jessamyn could reveal to us all how the sausage is made at MeFi.
posted by psmealey at 2:39 AM on April 3, 2008
posted by psmealey at 2:39 AM on April 3, 2008
Who wants a soda in the mail?
Do not challenge me.
You know, this really highlights why so many women have body image problems.
Eh, it highlights that tequila is not your friend, no matter how sweetly it whispers in your ear.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:41 AM on April 3, 2008
Do not challenge me.
You know, this really highlights why so many women have body image problems.
Eh, it highlights that tequila is not your friend, no matter how sweetly it whispers in your ear.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:41 AM on April 3, 2008
MetaFilter: bacon bra yes or no?
posted by yhbc at 5:00 AM on April 3, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by yhbc at 5:00 AM on April 3, 2008 [1 favorite]
Wait until you all get a load of my bacon condom photostream!
posted by sourwookie at 5:21 AM on April 3, 2008 [3 favorites]
posted by sourwookie at 5:21 AM on April 3, 2008 [3 favorites]
We have finally found a bacon post that people hate. It's about time.
posted by caddis at 7:11 AM on April 3, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by caddis at 7:11 AM on April 3, 2008 [1 favorite]
When we were younger, our mother told us that we could do anything- even murder- as long as we never lied (she later denied saying this, but I remember it pretty clearly). When I have children, I will tell them they can do anything, as long as pictures of it don't end up on the internet. If they need photographic examples of the kinds of things I'm talking about, I will show them the picture of the woman with the bacon bra.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 7:13 AM on April 3, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 7:13 AM on April 3, 2008 [2 favorites]
sourwookie : Wait until you all get a load of my bacon condom photostream!
I'll look for it, but I'm going to be pissed if it turns out to be pictures of you having sex with a pig.
posted by quin at 7:34 AM on April 3, 2008 [1 favorite]
I'll look for it, but I'm going to be pissed if it turns out to be pictures of you having sex with a pig.
posted by quin at 7:34 AM on April 3, 2008 [1 favorite]
I can't favorite from my phone (note to self), so I would just like to give regular, text-based applause to various pieces of this overall MeTa - the mere idea of the bacon bra (a close second in mind-bogglingness to the bacon vodka recipe one of y'all linked in AskMe last week)... the mod chat peek... the brainstorming on how to properly remit an owed Diet Coke... regardless of the final value of the original FPP or the call-out itself, I would argue that the ensuing thread redeems both/either.
Happy Thursday, you zany goofs!
posted by pineapple at 7:50 AM on April 3, 2008
Happy Thursday, you zany goofs!
posted by pineapple at 7:50 AM on April 3, 2008
Grod: today's winner of person I would most like to never hear from again.
Ditto. But tied with hojoki. I actually got a Lecterish chill when he talked about "it."
And whatever pineapple just took, I want some.
posted by CunningLinguist at 8:26 AM on April 3, 2008
Ditto. But tied with hojoki. I actually got a Lecterish chill when he talked about "it."
And whatever pineapple just took, I want some.
posted by CunningLinguist at 8:26 AM on April 3, 2008
Just phone up the local pizza place and have them deliver a coke.
Restaurants that deliver are only a dream here. You'd have better luck calling my neighbor and convincing him to go out and buy one at the store and bring it over. In fact paying me my hourly rate to go get myself one is probably your cheapest option.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 8:27 AM on April 3, 2008
Restaurants that deliver are only a dream here. You'd have better luck calling my neighbor and convincing him to go out and buy one at the store and bring it over. In fact paying me my hourly rate to go get myself one is probably your cheapest option.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 8:27 AM on April 3, 2008
As much as humanly possible I would like to apologize for the profound stupidity of boys.
I am perfectly capable of apologizing for my own stupidity, thanks. Thankfully, I am not stupid enough to have commented in that thread at all, but for my other past and inevitable future moments of stupidity I hereby wholeheartedly and without reservation apologize.
posted by shmegegge at 9:17 AM on April 3, 2008
I am perfectly capable of apologizing for my own stupidity, thanks. Thankfully, I am not stupid enough to have commented in that thread at all, but for my other past and inevitable future moments of stupidity I hereby wholeheartedly and without reservation apologize.
posted by shmegegge at 9:17 AM on April 3, 2008
I actually got a Lecterish chill when he talked about "it."
IT PUTS THE BACON ON THE BOOB OR ELSE IT GETS THE HOSE ANEW.
posted by dersins at 9:25 AM on April 3, 2008 [1 favorite]
IT PUTS THE BACON ON THE BOOB OR ELSE IT GETS THE HOSE ANEW.
posted by dersins at 9:25 AM on April 3, 2008 [1 favorite]
Cunning, that was very creepy... But what's strange is that hojoki has earlier said she's a mom; maybe hojoki of the "it" comment is hojoki-the-mom's 15-year-old kid or something? *shrugs*
posted by taz at 9:35 AM on April 3, 2008
posted by taz at 9:35 AM on April 3, 2008
The Diet Coke is still owed to me, but I may collect at some future date. Who wants a soda in the mail?
posted by jessamyn at 12:57 AM on April 3
A person who appreciates the effervescent joy of an ice cold soda on a hot day. A person who thirsts for invigorating caffeinated refreshment after hard day's work. In short, a person who appreciates a good soda. Are you this kind of person, jessamyn? Are any of you? For those who have looked deep within themselves and discovered that they are, I invite you to read further. The rest of you? Go and begone. Drink your lemon-limes and your Hawaiian Punches, and step no further into this, L'Académie Gustative.
So you are a person you knows a good sodaed beverage. Then you must also know there is no better soda than Diet Coke. But which Diet Coke? It may surprise you to learn that they aren't all the same.
If you want to be specific, you want to order Diet Coke bottled by the Coca Cola Enterprises Northeast Bottlers. Northeast Bottlers' Diet Coca-Cola imbues the top secret Diet Coke recipe with an infusion of lime and cinnamon that projects the already crisp flavor upward into the astral plane. I speak metaphorically of course, but it is no exagerration to say that to appreciate a good Diet Coke you must learn to taste in the folded six hidden dimensions of spacetime, because buried within those Chalabi-Yau spaces lies quintessence of effervescence.
When you pour a Northeast Bottlers' Diet Coke from a can over a scoop or two of shaved ice, you are rewarded with a crackling mocha-white foam that is a feast for the ears and eyes as well as for the tongue. A well poured can of Diet Coke transcends its beverageness. It is alchemical. Each bubble is a rejuvenating world-within-a-world, the decoherence of all quantum cola possibilities. This is why Diet Coke poured into a glass will crack ordinary cubes of ice. The flavor itself rends spacetime - the cracking of the cube is an aftershock of the shearing of the universe.
Other bottlers' simply cannot measure up to the Northeast's secret flavor processes. The Great Lakes and Midwest Bottlers have erred on the side of being too sweet, while the Southeast and Southwest Bottlers treat the elixir as some sort of refinery by-product, to be served warm out of vulgar two "liter" bottles like engine oil. And the West Coast Bottlers receive no mention here. A West Coast Diet Coke is pregnant with doom. I have a beverage of my own for these chemists of the profane - a 20 ounce bottle of my utter contempt.
Now, jessamyn, you can hear the protestations as well as I. "What about Diet Pepsi?" This isn't Fark. We aspire to better here. "Dr. Pepper?" It's pronounced "read it", but spelled reddit. "Mountain Dew?" You should probably just go back to watching UHF television.
Now, when you go to buy your genuine freshness-dated Northeast Bottler Diet Coke, you will want to buy the 12 oz can, preferably from an air-conditioned food and beverage merchant. Do not buy Diet Coke in 2-liter bottles, as they go flat immediately upon opening, and like 20-oz plastic bottles, they are impossible to refrigerate evenly and sufficiently. Diet Coke in plastic bottles is kevlar-jacketed nitrotoluene. It is the exclusive recipe of He of The Most Black, Satan himself. And no one invited the Lord of Flies to your romantic May Day picnic.
At this point I feel that Metafilter has grown large enough and has matured enough to take this advice in the spirit in which it is meant. There is simply no reason to buy Diet Coke off the tarmac of a gas station, regardless of the discount. You deserve better. Never forget that even in the depths of poverty, Dignity too has its price. Gas station soda, or as we connoisseurs refer to it, "Road Coke", is suitable only for the blasted alkali flats of the Apocalypse, and no sooner. And even then, consumption of Road Coke should be done by no one save for your traveling pack mule, or burro.
Now, jessamyn and others, you will notice that I have not at all discussed the important issue of fountain sodas. The issue is simply too complex for a cursory overview in this forum. For an exhaustive treatment of the subject, I direct you to my upcoming book Fountains of Youth: 1279 Soda Fountains Reviewed. But I have prepared a chart comparing the soda fountains of every major and regional fast food chain in the northeast United States, and I will reproduce the same here upon request. Because that is the level of service I am committed to offer.
Finally I leave with a note to our European friends. Coca Cola Light is not Diet Coke. Do not mistake the two. You gave us postmodernism, we gave you postmodern Coke. It was our retribution. Never think that because you have sluiced untold Coca Cola Lights down your Continental gullets that you have tasted true refreshment. You have not had a Diet Coke, and that truth will dog you to your graves. Like a lover, Diet Coke is something we will not share with you. Not Ever.
posted by Pastabagel at 9:48 AM on April 3, 2008 [43 favorites]
posted by jessamyn at 12:57 AM on April 3
A person who appreciates the effervescent joy of an ice cold soda on a hot day. A person who thirsts for invigorating caffeinated refreshment after hard day's work. In short, a person who appreciates a good soda. Are you this kind of person, jessamyn? Are any of you? For those who have looked deep within themselves and discovered that they are, I invite you to read further. The rest of you? Go and begone. Drink your lemon-limes and your Hawaiian Punches, and step no further into this, L'Académie Gustative.
So you are a person you knows a good sodaed beverage. Then you must also know there is no better soda than Diet Coke. But which Diet Coke? It may surprise you to learn that they aren't all the same.
If you want to be specific, you want to order Diet Coke bottled by the Coca Cola Enterprises Northeast Bottlers. Northeast Bottlers' Diet Coca-Cola imbues the top secret Diet Coke recipe with an infusion of lime and cinnamon that projects the already crisp flavor upward into the astral plane. I speak metaphorically of course, but it is no exagerration to say that to appreciate a good Diet Coke you must learn to taste in the folded six hidden dimensions of spacetime, because buried within those Chalabi-Yau spaces lies quintessence of effervescence.
When you pour a Northeast Bottlers' Diet Coke from a can over a scoop or two of shaved ice, you are rewarded with a crackling mocha-white foam that is a feast for the ears and eyes as well as for the tongue. A well poured can of Diet Coke transcends its beverageness. It is alchemical. Each bubble is a rejuvenating world-within-a-world, the decoherence of all quantum cola possibilities. This is why Diet Coke poured into a glass will crack ordinary cubes of ice. The flavor itself rends spacetime - the cracking of the cube is an aftershock of the shearing of the universe.
Other bottlers' simply cannot measure up to the Northeast's secret flavor processes. The Great Lakes and Midwest Bottlers have erred on the side of being too sweet, while the Southeast and Southwest Bottlers treat the elixir as some sort of refinery by-product, to be served warm out of vulgar two "liter" bottles like engine oil. And the West Coast Bottlers receive no mention here. A West Coast Diet Coke is pregnant with doom. I have a beverage of my own for these chemists of the profane - a 20 ounce bottle of my utter contempt.
Now, jessamyn, you can hear the protestations as well as I. "What about Diet Pepsi?" This isn't Fark. We aspire to better here. "Dr. Pepper?" It's pronounced "read it", but spelled reddit. "Mountain Dew?" You should probably just go back to watching UHF television.
Now, when you go to buy your genuine freshness-dated Northeast Bottler Diet Coke, you will want to buy the 12 oz can, preferably from an air-conditioned food and beverage merchant. Do not buy Diet Coke in 2-liter bottles, as they go flat immediately upon opening, and like 20-oz plastic bottles, they are impossible to refrigerate evenly and sufficiently. Diet Coke in plastic bottles is kevlar-jacketed nitrotoluene. It is the exclusive recipe of He of The Most Black, Satan himself. And no one invited the Lord of Flies to your romantic May Day picnic.
At this point I feel that Metafilter has grown large enough and has matured enough to take this advice in the spirit in which it is meant. There is simply no reason to buy Diet Coke off the tarmac of a gas station, regardless of the discount. You deserve better. Never forget that even in the depths of poverty, Dignity too has its price. Gas station soda, or as we connoisseurs refer to it, "Road Coke", is suitable only for the blasted alkali flats of the Apocalypse, and no sooner. And even then, consumption of Road Coke should be done by no one save for your traveling pack mule, or burro.
Now, jessamyn and others, you will notice that I have not at all discussed the important issue of fountain sodas. The issue is simply too complex for a cursory overview in this forum. For an exhaustive treatment of the subject, I direct you to my upcoming book Fountains of Youth: 1279 Soda Fountains Reviewed. But I have prepared a chart comparing the soda fountains of every major and regional fast food chain in the northeast United States, and I will reproduce the same here upon request. Because that is the level of service I am committed to offer.
Finally I leave with a note to our European friends. Coca Cola Light is not Diet Coke. Do not mistake the two. You gave us postmodernism, we gave you postmodern Coke. It was our retribution. Never think that because you have sluiced untold Coca Cola Lights down your Continental gullets that you have tasted true refreshment. You have not had a Diet Coke, and that truth will dog you to your graves. Like a lover, Diet Coke is something we will not share with you. Not Ever.
posted by Pastabagel at 9:48 AM on April 3, 2008 [43 favorites]
I have a beverage of my own for these chemists of the profane - a 20 ounce bottle of my utter contempt.
That didn't make it all worthwhile, but it did bring it a fair bit closer.
posted by heeeraldo at 10:01 AM on April 3, 2008
That didn't make it all worthwhile, but it did bring it a fair bit closer.
posted by heeeraldo at 10:01 AM on April 3, 2008
Hmmm taz. Not just that, but it seems the once upon a time, hojoki and I had a "jinx" moment in AskMe when we both declared Brief Encounter the most romantic movie of all time. The idea of Hannibal Lecter watching Brief Encounter is giving me whirling vertigo.
IT PUTS THE LOTION ON ITS SKIN OR ELSE IT GETS A HEARTBREAKING STIFF UPPER LIP.
posted by CunningLinguist at 10:51 AM on April 3, 2008
IT PUTS THE LOTION ON ITS SKIN OR ELSE IT GETS A HEARTBREAKING STIFF UPPER LIP.
posted by CunningLinguist at 10:51 AM on April 3, 2008
Flat.
posted by Dizzy at 11:18 AM on April 3, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by Dizzy at 11:18 AM on April 3, 2008 [2 favorites]
The last can of soda I had was called Jamaican Irish Moss Vanilla Drink and it was astonishingly delicious, if lumpy. Thanks for the treatise Pastabagel.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:48 AM on April 3, 2008
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:48 AM on April 3, 2008
Hmm. Apparently, if I'm getting you all correctly, I should read the actual thread before pronouncing it redeemed?
Damn you people and your 'wah wah wah, if you want to participate in the MeTa, you have to read the FPP.'
Next you'll be telling me that to comment in the thread, I have to read the links first.
posted by pineapple at 11:51 AM on April 3, 2008
Damn you people and your 'wah wah wah, if you want to participate in the MeTa, you have to read the FPP.'
Next you'll be telling me that to comment in the thread, I have to read the links first.
posted by pineapple at 11:51 AM on April 3, 2008
I find BaconFilter to be pretty meh on the whole. I mean, it's enough already with the bacon posts. Mods please cross check all bacon posts with a list of Pork Council IPs and ban accordingly. I like bacon as much as the next guy, but dude, I get it: Strips of dead pig are damn tasty. The novelty of it's X -- made of BACON! has worn mighty thin. In the same way that X + clock = slightly more useful, X + bacon = completely useless. Bacon is the anti-clock, and it saddens me that each day, MetaFilter turned further and further anti-clockwise.
Like a lover, Diet Coke is something we will not share with you. Not Ever.
Your girlfriend also tastes horrible.
posted by Sys Rq at 12:11 PM on April 3, 2008 [1 favorite]
Like a lover, Diet Coke is something we will not share with you. Not Ever.
Your girlfriend also tastes horrible.
posted by Sys Rq at 12:11 PM on April 3, 2008 [1 favorite]
I enjoyed the pics. I think she's cute. I'm glad I happened to see the post before it got deleted. I don't see why deleting a few comments in the thread would not have been sufficient.
posted by Crabby Appleton at 12:21 PM on April 3, 2008
posted by Crabby Appleton at 12:21 PM on April 3, 2008
For my recent colonoscopy, I drank a liter and a half of citrate of magnesia solution, for which I selected the pineapple flavoring packet. I fear that this experience has forever impaired my affection for pineapple.
Learn from my sad example, pineapple. While viewing that photo in no way diminishes the charms of bacon and boobs, reading that thread may change how you feel about boys.
posted by ottereroticist at 12:56 PM on April 3, 2008
Learn from my sad example, pineapple. While viewing that photo in no way diminishes the charms of bacon and boobs, reading that thread may change how you feel about boys.
posted by ottereroticist at 12:56 PM on April 3, 2008
ottereroticist, did it change how you feel about boys? How so?
posted by danOstuporStar at 1:32 PM on April 3, 2008
posted by danOstuporStar at 1:32 PM on April 3, 2008
pineapple said: "regardless of the final value of the original FPP or the call-out itself, I would argue that the ensuing thread redeems both/either."
Yep. With the benefit of full information, I'd say the original thread is unredeemable after all.
Still! This MeTa was a winner.
You're all winners.
posted by pineapple at 1:37 PM on April 3, 2008
Yep. With the benefit of full information, I'd say the original thread is unredeemable after all.
Still! This MeTa was a winner.
You're all winners.
posted by pineapple at 1:37 PM on April 3, 2008
Cunning, that was very creepy... But what's strange is that hojoki has earlier said she's a mom;
Not that strange. Moms can be creepy, sexist assholes too.
posted by LeeJay at 1:42 PM on April 3, 2008
Not that strange. Moms can be creepy, sexist assholes too.
posted by LeeJay at 1:42 PM on April 3, 2008
PastaBagel, If you ever again try to say that any diet Coke is better than Coke Classic and the pinnacle of CC, Passover Coca-Cola Classic I will challenge you to a duel. (broadswords in a pit) Here in the home of all things holy and Cola, Atlanta we know that Coke with corn syrup is better than coke with some kind of unnatural methanol by product for sweetener and coke with honest to got cane sugar is the best of all.
posted by Megafly at 3:26 PM on April 3, 2008
posted by Megafly at 3:26 PM on April 3, 2008
As much as humanly possible I would like to apologize for the profound stupidity of boys.
This is why MetaFilter can't have nice bras.
One day, when MeFi grows up, we will be able to look at things like bacon bras without picking apart the woman who owns them. Until then, please... no more boobies on MetaFilter. It's uniformly a bad experience for other boobie owners.
MetaFilter does not deserve boobies.
posted by DarlingBri at 3:58 PM on April 3, 2008 [3 favorites]
Next up: diet coke bra. On loquacious.
Can I just have an imported Mexican Coke? Y'know, in a glass bottle with real sugar?
Flat.
Ouch, man. Ouch.
posted by loquacious at 4:04 PM on April 3, 2008
Can I just have an imported Mexican Coke? Y'know, in a glass bottle with real sugar?
Flat.
Ouch, man. Ouch.
posted by loquacious at 4:04 PM on April 3, 2008
picking apart the woman who owns them ... MetaFilter does not deserve boobies.
Were there other comments besides Grod's and hojoki's (who may be female) where "MetaFilter" picked apart the woman? Two dorks out 43 comments is actually a pretty good ratio by internet standards, but don't let that stop you from damning the maturity of the entire community.
posted by danOstuporStar at 4:43 PM on April 3, 2008
Were there other comments besides Grod's and hojoki's (who may be female) where "MetaFilter" picked apart the woman? Two dorks out 43 comments is actually a pretty good ratio by internet standards, but don't let that stop you from damning the maturity of the entire community.
posted by danOstuporStar at 4:43 PM on April 3, 2008
Were there other comments besides Grod's and hojoki's
There were, just a few. I only removed two comments linking directly to photos of the woman on Flickr. By my count there were maybe 4-8 comments total that were either talking shit about the woman's non-titty attributes or otherwise saying "ick" which could be interpreted a few ways, not all of them as bad as others. Then there were maybe 3-5 comments that responded to those comments in some way or another. So somewhere between 15-25% of the comments in that thread were some variant of attack or defense about what she looked like without the bacon.
That's counting by comment not by comment-making-dork; there may be multiple comments per dork (your word not mine). Then there were the standard titty/piggy/drool comments which I think are par for the course and don't really bug me much personally but, as a boob owner, don't make me feel like commenting. Some of them were flagged by other people, boob-owners and non-. And this is all on top of a pretty thin post. So, not a great post to begin with and one that went slightly downhill and appeared to be accelerating.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 5:53 PM on April 3, 2008
There were, just a few. I only removed two comments linking directly to photos of the woman on Flickr. By my count there were maybe 4-8 comments total that were either talking shit about the woman's non-titty attributes or otherwise saying "ick" which could be interpreted a few ways, not all of them as bad as others. Then there were maybe 3-5 comments that responded to those comments in some way or another. So somewhere between 15-25% of the comments in that thread were some variant of attack or defense about what she looked like without the bacon.
That's counting by comment not by comment-making-dork; there may be multiple comments per dork (your word not mine). Then there were the standard titty/piggy/drool comments which I think are par for the course and don't really bug me much personally but, as a boob owner, don't make me feel like commenting. Some of them were flagged by other people, boob-owners and non-. And this is all on top of a pretty thin post. So, not a great post to begin with and one that went slightly downhill and appeared to be accelerating.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 5:53 PM on April 3, 2008
That little window into the Jessamyn/Cortex discussion? That was kind of like Mystery Science Theater for MetaFilter. And, like MST itself, the commentary was more fun than the thing being commented upon. Can we have more?
posted by daisyace at 5:55 PM on April 3, 2008
posted by daisyace at 5:55 PM on April 3, 2008
Were there other comments besides Grod's and hojoki's (who may be female) where "MetaFilter" picked apart the woman? Two dorks out 43 comments is actually a pretty good ratio by internet standards...
"Oh, you only got kicked in the balls twice in the first quarter? Well, that's alright then."
No. It really isn't. We have endlessly, endlessly discussed why MetaFilter is not a comfortable place for many MeFi women, why the Blue is particularly difficult, and why the Boyzone Reunion Tour just fucking sucks. You may wish to review some notes.
posted by DarlingBri at 6:04 PM on April 3, 2008 [2 favorites]
"Oh, you only got kicked in the balls twice in the first quarter? Well, that's alright then."
No. It really isn't. We have endlessly, endlessly discussed why MetaFilter is not a comfortable place for many MeFi women, why the Blue is particularly difficult, and why the Boyzone Reunion Tour just fucking sucks. You may wish to review some notes.
posted by DarlingBri at 6:04 PM on April 3, 2008 [2 favorites]
As much as humanly possible I would like to apologize for the profound stupidity of boys.
For the record, hojoki's a woman.
posted by jonmc at 6:30 PM on April 3, 2008
For the record, hojoki's a woman.
posted by jonmc at 6:30 PM on April 3, 2008
meh.
i linked to a bacon bikini over a month before this, in the Bacon Cups - Serving Bowls Made of Bacon thread.
posted by UbuRoivas at 7:21 PM on April 3, 2008
i linked to a bacon bikini over a month before this, in the Bacon Cups - Serving Bowls Made of Bacon thread.
posted by UbuRoivas at 7:21 PM on April 3, 2008
And this is all on top of a pretty thin post. So, not a great post to begin with and one that went slightly downhill and appeared to be accelerating.
This sounds like you believe I have a problem with the deletion. I don't,... not with any of them. I concur with meh and "not the best of the web", and uncool linking to her face.
But I took your comment to dawson as a request for all of us to chill out about this one and have a coke. It's not worth it. Well, sure, I'll fetch the ice.
But, sorry, when disparaging comments about "boys" and "grow up, you don't deserve boobies" and "dick moves" start showing up the coke circle isn't fun anymore. People that want a more gender-neutral site shouldn't be using such gendered language ... when we're already on the second run to corner market.
posted by danOstuporStar at 9:00 PM on April 3, 2008
This sounds like you believe I have a problem with the deletion. I don't,... not with any of them. I concur with meh and "not the best of the web", and uncool linking to her face.
But I took your comment to dawson as a request for all of us to chill out about this one and have a coke. It's not worth it. Well, sure, I'll fetch the ice.
But, sorry, when disparaging comments about "boys" and "grow up, you don't deserve boobies" and "dick moves" start showing up the coke circle isn't fun anymore. People that want a more gender-neutral site shouldn't be using such gendered language ... when we're already on the second run to corner market.
posted by danOstuporStar at 9:00 PM on April 3, 2008
I'm not sure I agree with the idea that a gender-neutral site would simply not make references to gender: I think the issue is more that gender should be able to be noticed/discussed without falling into sexual stereotyping and 'I'd hit that'. We, the female population of metafilter*, are terribly sorry that you're not having fun here, but ... ok, I give up, what the hell does 'the second run to corner market' mean?
*Actually I don't speak for them, I usually disagree with most of them because they're people and I'm a contrarian.
posted by jacalata at 9:27 PM on April 3, 2008
*Actually I don't speak for them, I usually disagree with most of them because they're people and I'm a contrarian.
posted by jacalata at 9:27 PM on April 3, 2008
I took your comment to dawson as a request for all of us to chill out about this one and have a coke. It's not worth it. Well, sure, I'll fetch the ice.
But...
But nothing, really. Everyone has an individual responsibility to chill out and that generally means that some/most people will and a few will not. Not fighting with the people who, for whatever reason, are still upset, keeps things calmer. I always assume they are having a bad day for reasons unrelated to MetaFilter. You can MeMail people if you have something in particular to say to them.
No one said "dick move" in this thread. No one said "grow up" in this thread. People don't want a gender neutral site to the best of my understanding and women on this site generally don't throw fits about things like the casual use of the word "girl." I'm fairly certain that this isn't about gendered language [comments like "bitch" and "dick" are both usually fair game on most of this site] it's about not having a thread on some silly bacon bra turn into a referendum on whether the woman wearing the bra is or is not fit, is or is not sporting chin/pit stubble and is or is not pleasing to the people viewing three photos of her on the internet.
The post was lightweight, but if the comments hadn't made it seem like it was bad turning to worse, we probably would have left it up. It's a silly dumb bacon gag that's been on a ton of other sites on the internet [a few weeks ago] without it turning into a "she's gross" pile-on. It's too bad a few chuckleheaded comments made the thread icky for people.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:39 PM on April 3, 2008
But...
But nothing, really. Everyone has an individual responsibility to chill out and that generally means that some/most people will and a few will not. Not fighting with the people who, for whatever reason, are still upset, keeps things calmer. I always assume they are having a bad day for reasons unrelated to MetaFilter. You can MeMail people if you have something in particular to say to them.
No one said "dick move" in this thread. No one said "grow up" in this thread. People don't want a gender neutral site to the best of my understanding and women on this site generally don't throw fits about things like the casual use of the word "girl." I'm fairly certain that this isn't about gendered language [comments like "bitch" and "dick" are both usually fair game on most of this site] it's about not having a thread on some silly bacon bra turn into a referendum on whether the woman wearing the bra is or is not fit, is or is not sporting chin/pit stubble and is or is not pleasing to the people viewing three photos of her on the internet.
The post was lightweight, but if the comments hadn't made it seem like it was bad turning to worse, we probably would have left it up. It's a silly dumb bacon gag that's been on a ton of other sites on the internet [a few weeks ago] without it turning into a "she's gross" pile-on. It's too bad a few chuckleheaded comments made the thread icky for people.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:39 PM on April 3, 2008
ok, I give up, what the hell does 'the second run to corner market' mean?
It means that it seemed to me this thread had more-or-less reached a conclusion that's pretty much the same a jessamyn describes above and that no one was really arguing it and that a swinging diet coke party had broken out and, I dunno, I went to get ice or something. But when I get back people are tossing the generalizations about boys and MetaFilter as a whole, and, gimme a break, it was after midnight and the analogy kinda sucked.
We, the female population of metafilter*, ...*Actually I don't speak for them,
DarlingBri does: "It's uniformly a bad experience for other boobie owners."
Not fighting with the people who, for whatever reason, are still upset, keeps things calmer.
So would being extra careful about gendered language in a thread like this. Normally I wouldn't give a second though to something like "user_x was pretty much a dick in that thread", but in a metatalk thread with sexism implications, where some non-specific portion of male mefite population has already been characterized as crawling knuckle-draggers ? Well, in that context, the "dicks" start to stand out.
Then when pineapple suggested maybe the thread wasn't all that bad and a couple of responses were like "unsanctioned response, comrade, read again" and then pineapple recanted, well, that kind of weirds me out. I respect pineapple so I have to believe she would have recanted anyway, but still, strange.
Especially when ottereroticist suggested reading it could change one's opinion of "boys" (again some vague subset of the male community here) forever. My request for clarification from her was both sincere and rhetorical. I do not feel it was at all incendiary.
No one said "grow up" in this thread.
Yes, some one did. I don't see how else to read One day, when MeFi grows up. Maybe "no one told you, dano, to grow up, don't take it so personally"? Well, I really didn't, and I don't get why I'm being told to keep things calmer but others "are having a bad day". But, ok, I'm off to the stfu corner with dawson.
posted by danOstuporStar at 6:15 AM on April 4, 2008
It means that it seemed to me this thread had more-or-less reached a conclusion that's pretty much the same a jessamyn describes above and that no one was really arguing it and that a swinging diet coke party had broken out and, I dunno, I went to get ice or something. But when I get back people are tossing the generalizations about boys and MetaFilter as a whole, and, gimme a break, it was after midnight and the analogy kinda sucked.
We, the female population of metafilter*, ...*Actually I don't speak for them,
DarlingBri does: "It's uniformly a bad experience for other boobie owners."
Not fighting with the people who, for whatever reason, are still upset, keeps things calmer.
So would being extra careful about gendered language in a thread like this. Normally I wouldn't give a second though to something like "user_x was pretty much a dick in that thread", but in a metatalk thread with sexism implications, where some non-specific portion of male mefite population has already been characterized as crawling knuckle-draggers ? Well, in that context, the "dicks" start to stand out.
Then when pineapple suggested maybe the thread wasn't all that bad and a couple of responses were like "unsanctioned response, comrade, read again" and then pineapple recanted, well, that kind of weirds me out. I respect pineapple so I have to believe she would have recanted anyway, but still, strange.
Especially when ottereroticist suggested reading it could change one's opinion of "boys" (again some vague subset of the male community here) forever. My request for clarification from her was both sincere and rhetorical. I do not feel it was at all incendiary.
No one said "grow up" in this thread.
Yes, some one did. I don't see how else to read One day, when MeFi grows up. Maybe "no one told you, dano, to grow up, don't take it so personally"? Well, I really didn't, and I don't get why I'm being told to keep things calmer but others "are having a bad day". But, ok, I'm off to the stfu corner with dawson.
posted by danOstuporStar at 6:15 AM on April 4, 2008
where some non-specific portion of male mefite population has already been characterized as crawling knuckle-draggers ?
I wasn't aware that I was calling out "some non-specific portion of male mefite population." I thought I was referring to knuckle draggers. I really didn't think of it as a gendered insult and I apologize if it offended you. I was just a little upset. I had just read a bunch of offensive comments about the woman in the picture, including a particularly creepy one in which she was referred to as "it," and I was upset.
posted by LeeJay at 8:46 AM on April 4, 2008
I wasn't aware that I was calling out "some non-specific portion of male mefite population." I thought I was referring to knuckle draggers. I really didn't think of it as a gendered insult and I apologize if it offended you. I was just a little upset. I had just read a bunch of offensive comments about the woman in the picture, including a particularly creepy one in which she was referred to as "it," and I was upset.
posted by LeeJay at 8:46 AM on April 4, 2008
Then when pineapple suggested maybe the thread wasn't all that bad and a couple of responses were like "unsanctioned response, comrade, read again" and then pineapple recanted, well, that kind of weirds me out. I respect pineapple so I have to believe she would have recanted anyway, but still, strange.
I apologize sincerely and without snark for any additional confusion that my half-assed drive-by comments may have made up-thread. I am not sure if I'm in trouble for being indifferent originally (again, mea culpa for commenting on that which I had not read), or for recanting, but I really didn't have a dog in the hunt and should have been more thoughtful.
It's pretty safe to say that a MeTa with "boobs" in the title is likely to be best served by informed participation or none -- at least from me.
posted by pineapple at 9:00 AM on April 4, 2008
I apologize sincerely and without snark for any additional confusion that my half-assed drive-by comments may have made up-thread. I am not sure if I'm in trouble for being indifferent originally (again, mea culpa for commenting on that which I had not read), or for recanting, but I really didn't have a dog in the hunt and should have been more thoughtful.
It's pretty safe to say that a MeTa with "boobs" in the title is likely to be best served by informed participation or none -- at least from me.
posted by pineapple at 9:00 AM on April 4, 2008
danO, while I think I dig the principle you're arguing, I have to say that as a guy who likes both bacon and naked women and dislike broad-brush categorical attacks on anyone on the site, I'm having trouble taking any real offense at any of the anti-knuckledragger comments here. Certainly not enough to make it worth taking kind of an aggressive rhetorical stand.
I'm not gonna dismiss for example the idea of dick-as-genered-insult completely, because, hey, different strokes for different folks and I could see it being used as such in a context where there was a clear power structure that put penises and their owners in a ghettoized state, but this really doesn't feel like that situation.
It's a dicey issue, every time, and people get a little upset from both sides for different reasons, but it'd be nice if people could all just kind of take a couple steps back respectively and be cool about it. Avoiding potentially inflammatory generalizations (e.g. favoring "this group of commenter could grow up" over "Metafilter could grow up") is definitely a good idea, but so is avoiding overanalysis of the metonymy of those kinds of statements. Not every loose reference to a group needs to be interpreted in an uncharitably narrow or broad fashion, and it'd be nice if folks would look at that sort of situation and instead of running with such an interpretation could instead just politely ask for a clarification as step one.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:00 AM on April 4, 2008
I'm not gonna dismiss for example the idea of dick-as-genered-insult completely, because, hey, different strokes for different folks and I could see it being used as such in a context where there was a clear power structure that put penises and their owners in a ghettoized state, but this really doesn't feel like that situation.
It's a dicey issue, every time, and people get a little upset from both sides for different reasons, but it'd be nice if people could all just kind of take a couple steps back respectively and be cool about it. Avoiding potentially inflammatory generalizations (e.g. favoring "this group of commenter could grow up" over "Metafilter could grow up") is definitely a good idea, but so is avoiding overanalysis of the metonymy of those kinds of statements. Not every loose reference to a group needs to be interpreted in an uncharitably narrow or broad fashion, and it'd be nice if folks would look at that sort of situation and instead of running with such an interpretation could instead just politely ask for a clarification as step one.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:00 AM on April 4, 2008
pineapple, you are consistently one of the more thoughtful commenters on this site. You have nothing to apologize for!
posted by LeeJay at 9:07 AM on April 4, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by LeeJay at 9:07 AM on April 4, 2008 [1 favorite]
I wasn't aware that I was calling out "some non-specific portion of male mefite population." I thought I was referring to knuckle draggers. I really didn't think of it as a gendered insult and I apologize if it offended you.
Let me clarify. I was not trying to call out any particular group of male posters. I was calling out the group in the original thread that made the offensive comments - whether male or female. I wasn't aware that knuckle-draggers was a gendered insult although looking back on it now with a clearer head I can see how it could be. So I really do apologize for using it. I should have used a more neutral term. That doesn't mean I apologize for being upset. I absolutely do not. But I should have chosen my words more carefully.
posted by LeeJay at 9:21 AM on April 4, 2008
Let me clarify. I was not trying to call out any particular group of male posters. I was calling out the group in the original thread that made the offensive comments - whether male or female. I wasn't aware that knuckle-draggers was a gendered insult although looking back on it now with a clearer head I can see how it could be. So I really do apologize for using it. I should have used a more neutral term. That doesn't mean I apologize for being upset. I absolutely do not. But I should have chosen my words more carefully.
posted by LeeJay at 9:21 AM on April 4, 2008
Dan, sweetie, let me just double check I have this right.
A MeTa thread is started to discuss a rather lame, single image FPP. While a number of MeFi members do indeed concur that the post is in and of itself lame, others point out that the comments are in fact much more egregious than the post itself because they are rather liberally sprinkled with hostile assessments of the pictured woman's unacceptable breasts, body hair, weight and overall attractiveness.
It is pointed out that this is Yet Another Instance of women being treated derisively in discussions and how that contributes to a culture where female members often feel uncomfortable and excluded from joining discussions on MetaFilter - a community where we are apparently unable to rise to the challenge of going 30 days without an "I'd hit it" comment.
You then reply in a huff because you are offended by the use of the word "knuckledraggers" and the poor light it may or may not cast on your gender.
Seriously? That's what you're doing here?
You go, girlfriend.
posted by DarlingBri at 12:24 PM on April 4, 2008
A MeTa thread is started to discuss a rather lame, single image FPP. While a number of MeFi members do indeed concur that the post is in and of itself lame, others point out that the comments are in fact much more egregious than the post itself because they are rather liberally sprinkled with hostile assessments of the pictured woman's unacceptable breasts, body hair, weight and overall attractiveness.
It is pointed out that this is Yet Another Instance of women being treated derisively in discussions and how that contributes to a culture where female members often feel uncomfortable and excluded from joining discussions on MetaFilter - a community where we are apparently unable to rise to the challenge of going 30 days without an "I'd hit it" comment.
You then reply in a huff because you are offended by the use of the word "knuckledraggers" and the poor light it may or may not cast on your gender.
Seriously? That's what you're doing here?
You go, girlfriend.
posted by DarlingBri at 12:24 PM on April 4, 2008
danOstuporStar said: "Then when pineapple suggested maybe the thread wasn't all that bad and a couple of responses were like "unsanctioned response, comrade, read again" and then pineapple recanted, well, that kind of weirds me out. I respect pineapple so I have to believe she would have recanted anyway, but still, strange.
Especially when ottereroticist suggested reading it could change one's opinion of "boys" (again some vague subset of the male community here) forever. My request for clarification from her was both sincere and rhetorical. I do not feel it was at all incendiary."
Okay, back at the desk, have read it all. Clarifying again/further:
I didn't recant because I had been furtively shown some sort of MeFemme Action Bat Signal*, honest. My original response here was due to being tickled by the admin chat log. Once I'd read the original thread, I concurred that the comments from grod/hojoki/whosit were pretty yuck. While the rest seemed inoffensive enough, I could tell from leftover quotes that some stuff had been sanitized -- so it was likely worse than what was allowed to remain. And the behavior that I didn't like which I saw in there, once I actually saw it, made me feel that, by my jokey "Eh, really, it's ALL FINE!", I might have conveyed that the upset people didn't have a right to be. Which wasn't how I felt.
That was all. I hope that danO (or anybody else still reading) knows that I aim while at MetaFilter to not be kneejerk, and I certainly don't subscribe to group-think. I certainly didn't change my opinion of boys, or of anyone else in this conversation or that one... other than those jackasses who made the original tacky comments.
The thing that makes me sad is that girls are cool, and boobs are cool, and the picture itself (while arguably not FPP-worthy), was funny. That is some creative crafty shit right there. That is a good partner who would say, "Hm, my GF/BF likes [Food item] so I'm going to find an interesting way to put it on my naked body." I hope that we can get to a point one day where we can look at a link like that and not have it blow up because some canker sore** had to go all locker room*** over it.
* Although if we did have a MeFemme Action Bat Signal, you know what it would look like, right? Wouldn't it have to be a silhouette of a bra?
** Do you know how hard it was to get past my instinct for a creative gendered pejorative right there? I was all "...doucheba-- no... cocknug-- no... wanke-- no..."
*** NOT LOCKER-ROOM-IST.
p.s. sorry this was so incoherently written. I have an excuse. There was a luncheon.
posted by pineapple at 1:39 PM on April 4, 2008
Especially when ottereroticist suggested reading it could change one's opinion of "boys" (again some vague subset of the male community here) forever. My request for clarification from her was both sincere and rhetorical. I do not feel it was at all incendiary."
Okay, back at the desk, have read it all. Clarifying again/further:
I didn't recant because I had been furtively shown some sort of MeFemme Action Bat Signal*, honest. My original response here was due to being tickled by the admin chat log. Once I'd read the original thread, I concurred that the comments from grod/hojoki/whosit were pretty yuck. While the rest seemed inoffensive enough, I could tell from leftover quotes that some stuff had been sanitized -- so it was likely worse than what was allowed to remain. And the behavior that I didn't like which I saw in there, once I actually saw it, made me feel that, by my jokey "Eh, really, it's ALL FINE!", I might have conveyed that the upset people didn't have a right to be. Which wasn't how I felt.
That was all. I hope that danO (or anybody else still reading) knows that I aim while at MetaFilter to not be kneejerk, and I certainly don't subscribe to group-think. I certainly didn't change my opinion of boys, or of anyone else in this conversation or that one... other than those jackasses who made the original tacky comments.
The thing that makes me sad is that girls are cool, and boobs are cool, and the picture itself (while arguably not FPP-worthy), was funny. That is some creative crafty shit right there. That is a good partner who would say, "Hm, my GF/BF likes [Food item] so I'm going to find an interesting way to put it on my naked body." I hope that we can get to a point one day where we can look at a link like that and not have it blow up because some canker sore** had to go all locker room*** over it.
* Although if we did have a MeFemme Action Bat Signal, you know what it would look like, right? Wouldn't it have to be a silhouette of a bra?
** Do you know how hard it was to get past my instinct for a creative gendered pejorative right there? I was all "...doucheba-- no... cocknug-- no... wanke-- no..."
*** NOT LOCKER-ROOM-IST.
p.s. sorry this was so incoherently written. I have an excuse. There was a luncheon.
posted by pineapple at 1:39 PM on April 4, 2008
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It's a bra. It's made out of bacon. Sounds more like a new high to me.
posted by dersins at 9:21 PM on April 2, 2008 [1 favorite]