I HATE YOU ALL (EXCEPT OBAMA) July 24, 2008 7:04 AM Subscribe
Followup to this post.
If you need something to do, I can find something for you to do.
posted by Mayor Curley at 7:08 AM on July 24, 2008 [17 favorites]
posted by Mayor Curley at 7:08 AM on July 24, 2008 [17 favorites]
mr_crash_davis, I'd like to hug you. Would that be OK with you? For me to hug you?
posted by boo_radley at 7:08 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by boo_radley at 7:08 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
America is totally going to drop the ball again.
posted by chunking express at 7:09 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by chunking express at 7:09 AM on July 24, 2008
This is the worst Metatalk post ever and the worst Metafilter deleted post ever. You should feel bad about yourself. Also, please contact the creator of that website and tell them they should also feel bad about themselves. Then get in touch with both Mr. Obama and Mr. McCain and tell them that they are bad and should feel bad.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 7:11 AM on July 24, 2008 [3 favorites]
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 7:11 AM on July 24, 2008 [3 favorites]
You know what he needs? One of those stupid stickers that tells him that he's beautiful.
posted by jbickers at 7:11 AM on July 24, 2008 [5 favorites]
posted by jbickers at 7:11 AM on July 24, 2008 [5 favorites]
o_0?
What exactly does that symbol mean? (Might as well make this thread useful, since it's here.)
posted by konolia at 7:17 AM on July 24, 2008
What exactly does that symbol mean? (Might as well make this thread useful, since it's here.)
posted by konolia at 7:17 AM on July 24, 2008
I'm going to vote McCain just to piss this guy off.
posted by desjardins at 7:19 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by desjardins at 7:19 AM on July 24, 2008
o_0
Oogly boogly eyes. Used to show bewilderment or surprise.
He said something really cracked out so I looked at him like o_0.
Never mind...Urban Dictionary to the rescue. They have everything!
posted by konolia at 7:19 AM on July 24, 2008
Oogly boogly eyes. Used to show bewilderment or surprise.
He said something really cracked out so I looked at him like o_0.
Never mind...Urban Dictionary to the rescue. They have everything!
posted by konolia at 7:19 AM on July 24, 2008
I prefer to use a dot instead of an underscore. 0.o looks better.
posted by kbanas at 7:20 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by kbanas at 7:20 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
Never mind...Urban Dictionary to the rescue. They have everything!
Even inside jokes about my old screenwriting teacher at Santa Monica College that only like six people in the world could possibly get!
posted by drjimmy11 at 7:25 AM on July 24, 2008
Even inside jokes about my old screenwriting teacher at Santa Monica College that only like six people in the world could possibly get!
posted by drjimmy11 at 7:25 AM on July 24, 2008
I'm guessing that when crash originally posted it, the site didn't mention Obama. Now it does, and he wanted to point that out to us.
Am I right? If so, what do I win?
posted by yhbc at 7:32 AM on July 24, 2008
Am I right? If so, what do I win?
posted by yhbc at 7:32 AM on July 24, 2008
If the litmus of curmudgeonhood is regarding something that The Kids Today Like with a deep-seated, humorless distrust, Urban Dictionary has made one out of me.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:34 AM on July 24, 2008 [6 favorites]
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:34 AM on July 24, 2008 [6 favorites]
Huh, that double-posting thing doesn't happen much any more. Sorry about that.
posted by yhbc at 7:35 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by yhbc at 7:35 AM on July 24, 2008
I feel the hate and it hurts my gentle spirit. HURTS.
posted by Daddy-O at 7:42 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by Daddy-O at 7:42 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
Is someone mad at me?
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 7:48 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 7:48 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
You folks realize that if Obama is indeed the Second Coming, then it's pretty much game over, right? Rapture, end of days, etc.? So live it up, Obamastians. Come O-mas, I hope you've fucked every person, played every game, and climbed every mountain you ever wanted to; because when Judgement comes, it'll all be over.
posted by Eideteker at 7:51 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by Eideteker at 7:51 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
In before the lock.
Crash, you need to work this into an AskMe question for the shitty post trifecta.
posted by LarryC at 7:51 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
Crash, you need to work this into an AskMe question for the shitty post trifecta.
posted by LarryC at 7:51 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
Fuck the trifecta, we need cortex to write a song about it.
posted by ORthey at 8:06 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by ORthey at 8:06 AM on July 24, 2008
o_0?
So, George Bush is addressing reporters in Beijing before the opening ceremonies of the Olympics. He looks out over the audience, glances at his prepared notes, and begins: "Ooo, Ooo, Ooo, Ooo, Ooo." An uncomfortable silence follows until an aide leans over and whispers in his ear: "Um, Mr. President, that's the Olympics logo. Your speech is underneath."
posted by felix betachat at 8:12 AM on July 24, 2008 [30 favorites]
So, George Bush is addressing reporters in Beijing before the opening ceremonies of the Olympics. He looks out over the audience, glances at his prepared notes, and begins: "Ooo, Ooo, Ooo, Ooo, Ooo." An uncomfortable silence follows until an aide leans over and whispers in his ear: "Um, Mr. President, that's the Olympics logo. Your speech is underneath."
posted by felix betachat at 8:12 AM on July 24, 2008 [30 favorites]
Yeah, following Konolia, I'll use this wasted space to ask something I've been wondering about:
-How does one make that cool "does not equal" symbol (like "=/=" but for real)? It would have come in handy for me in this comment (apropos for this post, even).
posted by Rykey at 8:15 AM on July 24, 2008
-How does one make that cool "does not equal" symbol (like "=/=" but for real)? It would have come in handy for me in this comment (apropos for this post, even).
posted by Rykey at 8:15 AM on July 24, 2008
Also, while I'm trying my best to answer questions, this may help shed some light on the mystery (but not very much, not much at all). Basically yhbc is right, although the page has changed a few times by a very small amount, since 2000.
posted by Partial Law at 8:19 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by Partial Law at 8:19 AM on July 24, 2008
You know who's a damned character? eyeballkid.
posted by danOstuporStar at 8:25 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by danOstuporStar at 8:25 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
(assign_variable:blogname="polifi")
(assign_variable:template_group="frontpage")
(exp:since_last_visit:set_cookie expire="1")
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:27 AM on July 24, 2008
(assign_variable:template_group="frontpage")
(exp:since_last_visit:set_cookie expire="1")
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:27 AM on July 24, 2008
My god, it went from four words to nine. Nine!
It still only has two punctuation marks though.
posted by quin at 8:33 AM on July 24, 2008
It still only has two punctuation marks though.
posted by quin at 8:33 AM on July 24, 2008
I prefer O_o
And I hate Obama because once he takes office he will ban Postum.
Wait. Fuck.
posted by Dr-Baa at 8:38 AM on July 24, 2008
And I hate Obama because once he takes office he will ban Postum.
Wait. Fuck.
posted by Dr-Baa at 8:38 AM on July 24, 2008
I only hate some of you (you know who you are).
posted by octothorpe at 8:50 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by octothorpe at 8:50 AM on July 24, 2008
Jo'bama got a glass eye with a fish in it. Jo'bama, Jo'bama, Jo'bama.
posted by Divine_Wino at 8:58 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by Divine_Wino at 8:58 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
Sometimes I see a truck around town with and Obama/Hypnotoad sticker on it. It's pretty awesome. That's all.
posted by stet at 9:18 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
posted by stet at 9:18 AM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
To chop dry fruits, place them in fridge for half an hour before cutting. Take the fruits out and cut them with a hot knife (dip it in hot water before cutting).
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 9:36 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 9:36 AM on July 24, 2008
Sometimes, when I’m in a sort of hypnagogic state between wake and sleep, I make up little science fiction stories in my head that don’t necessarily turn out to be that great an idea. Like this morning I was thinking of some kind of story about someone investigating the ruins of a post-war nazi outpost in the rainforests of brazil, where some kind of effort to breed a super-Hitler was going on – one who would be genetically perfect and have telepathically enhanced powers of persuasion. This would be going on against the background of a presidential election back in the US, where a charismatic leader who came out of nowhere and who is basically Barack Obama is leading the polls… yadda yadda yadda… at the last minute the researcher figures out that the reborn super Hitler has been spirited away to America in some kind of Manchunian candidate type deal, and right at the end BARACK OBAMA WINS THE ELECTION AND IS HITLER!
I did say that they often turn out to be not that great of an idea…
posted by Artw at 9:41 AM on July 24, 2008
I did say that they often turn out to be not that great of an idea…
posted by Artw at 9:41 AM on July 24, 2008
I can't be the only one who read just enough of Left Behind to get freaked out whenever there's a political candidate riding such a large crest of populist fervor.
What? Oh, well never mind then.
posted by carsonb at 9:45 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
What? Oh, well never mind then.
posted by carsonb at 9:45 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
Greg Nog: "I guess it's not entirely related, but I keep looking at this ask.metafilter question and giggling, because the OP has to go see a man about a horse."
I remember the first time I heard that phrase. I was on a camping trip with my family and my father excused himself from the fireside saying "I gotta go see a man about a horse."
Do you realize how awesome that was? He was going to go get a horse for us! To get a horse ready to ride around the next day since we'd spent that whole stupid first day hiking around on stupid trails with our stupid feet hurting all the time. A horse was going to make that National Park fun!
He did not go see a man about a horse.
posted by Science! at 9:46 AM on July 24, 2008 [19 favorites]
I remember the first time I heard that phrase. I was on a camping trip with my family and my father excused himself from the fireside saying "I gotta go see a man about a horse."
Do you realize how awesome that was? He was going to go get a horse for us! To get a horse ready to ride around the next day since we'd spent that whole stupid first day hiking around on stupid trails with our stupid feet hurting all the time. A horse was going to make that National Park fun!
He did not go see a man about a horse.
posted by Science! at 9:46 AM on July 24, 2008 [19 favorites]
You have bullshit. The right color of bullshit to ingest in your body is... ANY FUCKIN COLOR. Who the hell cares. It's all good. Lick it up. Yummy yummy bullshit.
posted by Termite at 9:52 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by Termite at 9:52 AM on July 24, 2008
I did say that they often turn out to be not that great of an idea…
posted by Artw
Hey, I'd read that book.
posted by Grither at 9:54 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by Artw
Hey, I'd read that book.
posted by Grither at 9:54 AM on July 24, 2008
Fuck the trifecta, we need cortex to write a song about it.
But what if his music's bad? Should he feel bad? Should we feel bad? Should Crash feel bad? This post, which is bad and making me feel bad, is raising questions that make me feel bad and everyone else should feel bad, too.
Futurama ftw!
Incidentally, I used to think 'ftw' meant 'fuck the world' instead of 'for the win'
posted by WolfDaddy at 9:55 AM on July 24, 2008
But what if his music's bad? Should he feel bad? Should we feel bad? Should Crash feel bad? This post, which is bad and making me feel bad, is raising questions that make me feel bad and everyone else should feel bad, too.
Futurama ftw!
Incidentally, I used to think 'ftw' meant 'fuck the world' instead of 'for the win'
posted by WolfDaddy at 9:55 AM on July 24, 2008
Incidentally, I used to think 'ftw' meant 'fuck the world' instead of 'for the win'
It does mean Fuck the World in motorcycle circles.
posted by desjardins at 9:57 AM on July 24, 2008
It does mean Fuck the World in motorcycle circles.
posted by desjardins at 9:57 AM on July 24, 2008
Peanut Butter Light Ice Cream Product with Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Pieces and Fudge Swirl.
Not a light food. See nutrition information.
posted by Dizzy at 10:05 AM on July 24, 2008
Not a light food. See nutrition information.
posted by Dizzy at 10:05 AM on July 24, 2008
You know who's a damned character? eyeballkid.
He'd hate this, too. HATE.
posted by tizzie at 10:08 AM on July 24, 2008
He'd hate this, too. HATE.
posted by tizzie at 10:08 AM on July 24, 2008
I did say that they often turn out to be not that great of an idea…
posted by Artw
Hey, I'd read that book.
The lead times are all wrong.
posted by Artw at 10:13 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by Artw
Hey, I'd read that book.
The lead times are all wrong.
posted by Artw at 10:13 AM on July 24, 2008
So, George Bush is addressing reporters in Beijing before the opening ceremonies of the Olympics. He looks out over the audience, glances at his prepared notes, and begins: "Ooo, Ooo, Ooo, Ooo, Ooo." An uncomfortable silence follows until an aide leans over and whispers in his ear: "Um, Mr. President, that's the Olympics logo. Your speech is underneath."
Muscovites from 1980 called. They want their joke about Brezhnev back.
posted by flibbertigibbet at 10:21 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
Muscovites from 1980 called. They want their joke about Brezhnev back.
posted by flibbertigibbet at 10:21 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
I don't get why the original post was deleted. I loved it. jssmyn s s qck wth th trggr fngr n pltcl psts.
posted by madamjujujive at 10:30 AM on July 24, 2008 [3 favorites]
posted by madamjujujive at 10:30 AM on July 24, 2008 [3 favorites]
curiosity fucks me over again
posted by The Light Fantastic at 10:31 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by The Light Fantastic at 10:31 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
ArtW: Manchunian Candidate? Is that like a cross between the Manchurian Candidate and a Mancunian Candidate?
posted by adamrice at 10:33 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by adamrice at 10:33 AM on July 24, 2008
My next story will be about a methodical serial killer/assassin who takes out typo trolls with a high powered rifle.
posted by Artw at 10:46 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by Artw at 10:46 AM on July 24, 2008
mjj, what was that? A vowel movement?
posted by WolfDaddy at 10:57 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by WolfDaddy at 10:57 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
"You folks realize that if Obama is indeed the Second Coming, then it's pretty much game over, right? Rapture, end of days, etc.? So live it up, Obamastians. Come O-mas, I hope you've fucked every person, played every game, and climbed every mountain you ever wanted to; because when Judgement comes, it'll all be over."
LOLXBAMA
posted by klangklangston at 10:59 AM on July 24, 2008
LOLXBAMA
posted by klangklangston at 10:59 AM on July 24, 2008
I loved it. jssmyn s s qck
Jessamyn is squicky? I'm so happy we don't do silly vowel-modding here.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:09 AM on July 24, 2008
Jessamyn is squicky? I'm so happy we don't do silly vowel-modding here.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:09 AM on July 24, 2008
and sometimes 'y'.
posted by danOstuporStar at 11:15 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by danOstuporStar at 11:15 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
sometimes why?
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:17 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:17 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
I suppose I should have something to say, but, strangely, I don't.
posted by eyeballkid at 11:23 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by eyeballkid at 11:23 AM on July 24, 2008
Someone told me yesterday that the internet is expected to run out of bandwidth in a couple of years. If this is in any way true, I hold Metatalk responsible.
But I still love you, Metatalk. It just means we have to take out those other pesky sites. And then we will rule the internet together.
posted by Tehanu at 11:27 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
But I still love you, Metatalk. It just means we have to take out those other pesky sites. And then we will rule the internet together.
posted by Tehanu at 11:27 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
No worries. Bush just signed an executive order to begin offshore drilling for bandwidth.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:40 AM on July 24, 2008 [3 favorites]
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:40 AM on July 24, 2008 [3 favorites]
It's not about the fact that the website has changed.
mr_crash_davis is just slow to whine. Always has been.
posted by xod at 11:40 AM on July 24, 2008
mr_crash_davis is just slow to whine. Always has been.
posted by xod at 11:40 AM on July 24, 2008
WolfDaddy: "Incidentally, I used to think 'ftw' meant 'fuck the world' instead of 'for the win'"
desjardins: "It does mean Fuck the World in motorcycle circles."
I had it in my head that the "Fuck the World" interpreters were remembering that 1994 movie about the kid who gets taken hostage in a convenience store and espouses his Gen X philosophy to the cameras. Turns out that was actually SFW. But the crazy thing is that there was a 1994 movie called FTW! I don't know if I actually conflated the two in my head back in the day, or it's just a strange coincidence, but from now on I'm going to read it as Frank T. Wells, and assume you're saying the person is a good rodeo rider.
posted by team lowkey at 11:43 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
desjardins: "It does mean Fuck the World in motorcycle circles."
I had it in my head that the "Fuck the World" interpreters were remembering that 1994 movie about the kid who gets taken hostage in a convenience store and espouses his Gen X philosophy to the cameras. Turns out that was actually SFW. But the crazy thing is that there was a 1994 movie called FTW! I don't know if I actually conflated the two in my head back in the day, or it's just a strange coincidence, but from now on I'm going to read it as Frank T. Wells, and assume you're saying the person is a good rodeo rider.
posted by team lowkey at 11:43 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
No worries. Bush just signed an executive order to begin offshore drilling for bandwidth.
China started it.
posted by cortex (staff) at 11:44 AM on July 24, 2008
China started it.
posted by cortex (staff) at 11:44 AM on July 24, 2008
So, mr_crash_davis has basically found a way to get his shitty deleted post more attention. Cheers.
posted by !Jim at 11:45 AM on July 24, 2008
posted by !Jim at 11:45 AM on July 24, 2008
No worries. Bush just signed an executive order to begin offshore drilling for bandwidth.
This is a complete scam. It'll take TEN YEARS just to bring PPP service to Albuquerque.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 11:55 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
This is a complete scam. It'll take TEN YEARS just to bring PPP service to Albuquerque.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 11:55 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
I suppose I should have something to say, but, strangely, I don't.
Aww, does widdle pookums have something to say? So qyooooot when you're bashful like that! *pinches cheeks* Aww, come on, share with us! Do you need a big hug? I bet you do! *gets all up on eyeballkid with floppy hugs, tousles hair, pinches cheeks some more* Who's a pretty little hate machine? You are! *moves on to creepy tickling* OMG soooo cuuuuute I just want to eaaaaaat you allllll uppppp om nom nom. *plants big sloppy Bugs Bunny kiss, runs like fucking hell*
That oughta do it. I'm offering 2/1 odds on a 50 kiloton yield, or bigger. This is going to make 4th of July in Montana look like Sunday school in a fire danger zone in a dry county. Goggles, please. Safety first. He might be known as the eyeballkid, but that doesn't mean he won't burn out your damned eyeballs, kids. FIRE IN THE HOLE.
posted by loquacious at 12:04 PM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
Aww, does widdle pookums have something to say? So qyooooot when you're bashful like that! *pinches cheeks* Aww, come on, share with us! Do you need a big hug? I bet you do! *gets all up on eyeballkid with floppy hugs, tousles hair, pinches cheeks some more* Who's a pretty little hate machine? You are! *moves on to creepy tickling* OMG soooo cuuuuute I just want to eaaaaaat you allllll uppppp om nom nom. *plants big sloppy Bugs Bunny kiss, runs like fucking hell*
That oughta do it. I'm offering 2/1 odds on a 50 kiloton yield, or bigger. This is going to make 4th of July in Montana look like Sunday school in a fire danger zone in a dry county. Goggles, please. Safety first. He might be known as the eyeballkid, but that doesn't mean he won't burn out your damned eyeballs, kids. FIRE IN THE HOLE.
posted by loquacious at 12:04 PM on July 24, 2008 [2 favorites]
China started it
So that means we invade Iran then, right?
posted by Nick Verstayne at 12:04 PM on July 24, 2008
So that means we invade Iran then, right?
posted by Nick Verstayne at 12:04 PM on July 24, 2008
No worries. Bush just signed an executive order to begin offshore drilling for bandwidth.
Yeah, but he secured the Iraqi bandwidth first.
posted by Tehanu at 12:04 PM on July 24, 2008
Yeah, but he secured the Iraqi bandwidth first.
posted by Tehanu at 12:04 PM on July 24, 2008
This is a complete scam. It'll take TEN YEARS just to bring PPP service to Albuquerque.
You're underestimating the psychological benefits.
posted by xod at 12:05 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
You're underestimating the psychological benefits.
posted by xod at 12:05 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
In my mind, o_0 = `,:|
posted by Solon and Thanks at 12:29 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by Solon and Thanks at 12:29 PM on July 24, 2008
I...
I...
*deep breath*
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{LOQUACIOUS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
OMG I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!!!
posted by eyeballkid at 12:39 PM on July 24, 2008 [8 favorites]
I...
*deep breath*
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{LOQUACIOUS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
OMG I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!!!
posted by eyeballkid at 12:39 PM on July 24, 2008 [8 favorites]
Wow. That felt totally wrong. I think I pulled something.
posted by eyeballkid at 12:40 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by eyeballkid at 12:40 PM on July 24, 2008
Dude, there's blood coming out of your nose.
posted by cortex (staff) at 12:46 PM on July 24, 2008 [3 favorites]
posted by cortex (staff) at 12:46 PM on July 24, 2008 [3 favorites]
OMG I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!!!
posted by eyeballkid
My work here is done.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 1:09 PM on July 24, 2008 [5 favorites]
posted by eyeballkid
My work here is done.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 1:09 PM on July 24, 2008 [5 favorites]
Oh, man. I kissed him on the mouth for that? That's not an exploding head. That's... that's just not natural. Or right.
posted by loquacious at 1:40 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by loquacious at 1:40 PM on July 24, 2008
Oh, man. I kissed him on the mouth for that? That's not an exploding head. That's... that's just not natural. Or right.
I don't know about you, but it made me all tingly.
posted by The Light Fantastic at 1:45 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
I don't know about you, but it made me all tingly.
posted by The Light Fantastic at 1:45 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
After I retired, I went to the Social Security office to apply for benefits. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman I was very sorry, but I'd have to go home and come back later.
The woman said, "Unbutton your shirt."
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, "That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me," and she processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my girlfriend about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, "You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too."
posted by netbros at 2:16 PM on July 24, 2008 [11 favorites]
The woman said, "Unbutton your shirt."
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, "That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me," and she processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my girlfriend about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, "You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too."
posted by netbros at 2:16 PM on July 24, 2008 [11 favorites]
eyeballkid: "Wow. That felt totally wrong. I think I pulled something."
I think I know what it was. Afterglow can make you say strange things.
posted by dg at 2:21 PM on July 24, 2008
I think I know what it was. Afterglow can make you say strange things.
posted by dg at 2:21 PM on July 24, 2008
What was the site, originally, before it changed to Obama Campaign HQ? (I'm sure this new, updated site will nail down the xenophobe vote, too.)
posted by not_on_display at 2:40 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by not_on_display at 2:40 PM on July 24, 2008
Mod note: Some comments removed. I'm just plain uncomfortable with highly personal he-said-she-said airing of grievances in public; this needs to be worked out elsewhere.
posted by cortex (staff) at 2:45 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by cortex (staff) at 2:45 PM on July 24, 2008
We can still do the feats of strength when the time comes, right? Please?
posted by carsonb at 2:50 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by carsonb at 2:50 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
Someone told me yesterday that the internet is expected to run out of bandwidth in a couple of years. If this is in any way true, I hold Metatalk responsible.
No worries, Tehanu. We've planned for that. When that happens, mathowie will free up tons of free space by deleting all the old user accounts that have no comments. That will give us a few more years worth of bandwidth here on mefi. Have faith, mathowie got us through y2k safely, he's ready for the great bandwidth drought of '09.
posted by madamjujujive at 2:50 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
No worries, Tehanu. We've planned for that. When that happens, mathowie will free up tons of free space by deleting all the old user accounts that have no comments. That will give us a few more years worth of bandwidth here on mefi. Have faith, mathowie got us through y2k safely, he's ready for the great bandwidth drought of '09.
posted by madamjujujive at 2:50 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
I think at a certain date unknown to the rest of us, mathowie should delete all the accounts with the MOST comments.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 3:03 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 3:03 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
WTF, y'all? Price ain't amused.
Anyone being mean can kiss my buttery, mythical ass.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 3:09 PM on July 24, 2008
Anyone being mean can kiss my buttery, mythical ass.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 3:09 PM on July 24, 2008
PRINCE PRINCE DAMMIT I MEAN PRINCE
on the plus side, maybe he won't sue me now since I misspelled it.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 3:10 PM on July 24, 2008
on the plus side, maybe he won't sue me now since I misspelled it.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 3:10 PM on July 24, 2008
I reiterate my disappointment in the lack of literal ponies.
posted by elfgirl at 3:45 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by elfgirl at 3:45 PM on July 24, 2008
Shakespeherian, IMO that is way better than the Will Smith version. Aw, bless. Love him.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 3:49 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 3:49 PM on July 24, 2008
I think at a certain date unknown to the rest of us, mathowie should delete all the accounts with the MOST comments.
See ya, delmoi.
posted by fixedgear at 4:11 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
See ya, delmoi.
posted by fixedgear at 4:11 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
Your posts were bad and you should feel bad.
posted by FunkyHelix at 4:23 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by FunkyHelix at 4:23 PM on July 24, 2008
Thank you all for this thread. I'm stuck at work waiting for someone who was supposed to show up an hour ago and this helped me not jump in front of a bus.
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 4:26 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 4:26 PM on July 24, 2008
I think at a certain date unknown to the rest of us, mathowie should delete all the accounts with the MOST comments.
My loophole is to start a new account every year or so.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:28 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
My loophole is to start a new account every year or so.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:28 PM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]
Thank you, stupidsexyflanders, I'll try that.
posted by headnsouth at 4:38 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by headnsouth at 4:38 PM on July 24, 2008
I note the lovely davy was unable to restrain himself from making four comments (this is the first) in this most worthy of posts.
posted by Wolof at 5:32 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by Wolof at 5:32 PM on July 24, 2008
I think at a certain date unknown to the rest of us, mathowie should delete all the accounts with the MOST comments.
uh oh
posted by caddis at 6:11 PM on July 24, 2008
uh oh
posted by caddis at 6:11 PM on July 24, 2008
I thought that the band-width apocalypse plan was to delete all the accounts and move MetaFilter into a secret underground internet fort, the location of which is only known to the cabal.
I mean, there is no cabal.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 6:19 PM on July 24, 2008
I mean, there is no cabal.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 6:19 PM on July 24, 2008
Aren't you guys already in your underground internet forts?
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 6:28 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 6:28 PM on July 24, 2008
There is, however, a secret underground internet fort. Accessible only by submarine...and iPhone!
posted by carsonb at 6:29 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by carsonb at 6:29 PM on July 24, 2008
Aren't you guys already in your underground internet forts?
You're so web 2.0. It used to be called "mom's basement."
posted by felix betachat at 6:43 PM on July 24, 2008
You're so web 2.0. It used to be called "mom's basement."
posted by felix betachat at 6:43 PM on July 24, 2008
There is, however, a secret underground internet fort. Accessible only by submarine...
Or it WAS, until stupid John Locke blew it up.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 6:50 PM on July 24, 2008
Or it WAS, until stupid John Locke blew it up.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 6:50 PM on July 24, 2008
People didn't have basements where I grew up. There was no retreat from the parentals except outside. It was nice outside.
posted by Tehanu at 7:36 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by Tehanu at 7:36 PM on July 24, 2008
Not submarines! That's what the longboat was for! Right, longboaters?
posted by Lynsey at 8:54 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by Lynsey at 8:54 PM on July 24, 2008
beep - no results found for "underground internet forts"
posted by madamjujujive at 9:02 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by madamjujujive at 9:02 PM on July 24, 2008
I'd like to take this opportunity to publicly air my grievance with cortex. cortex, bad job removing those other public grievances before I was able to gawk at them, in the manner of automobile accidents. Thank you all for your time.
posted by Kwine at 10:56 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by Kwine at 10:56 PM on July 24, 2008
Hey, that's really classy, linking back to your deleted post! And really cool, too! Very impressive!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 11:30 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by flapjax at midnite at 11:30 PM on July 24, 2008
everyone is being entirely too nice
posted by The Light Fantastic at 11:34 PM on July 24, 2008
posted by The Light Fantastic at 11:34 PM on July 24, 2008
It was nice outside.
I have it on good authority that it is still nice outside.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 5:40 AM on July 25, 2008
I have it on good authority that it is still nice outside.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 5:40 AM on July 25, 2008
It is! I was outside earlier and can verify that as fact.
posted by Tehanu at 7:21 AM on July 25, 2008
posted by Tehanu at 7:21 AM on July 25, 2008
Just wanted to check in and let y'all know that I just got a letter from a good friend who's suddenly concerned that Obama is the Anti-Christ due to his tour of the world and popularity there. He was very serious and very concerned.
I don't have anyone who could appreciate this tidbit, so I'll tell you guys.
posted by unixrat at 8:07 AM on July 25, 2008
I don't have anyone who could appreciate this tidbit, so I'll tell you guys.
posted by unixrat at 8:07 AM on July 25, 2008
That's what the longboat was for! Right, longboaters?
If only we knew whose longboat it was.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 8:18 AM on July 25, 2008
If only we knew whose longboat it was.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 8:18 AM on July 25, 2008
...I just got a letter from a good friend who's suddenly concerned that Obama is the Anti-Christ...
Cool! I take it, then, that all the fundies will be voting for him come November? After all, what better way to speed the advance of the Apocalypse than to elect The Beast himself as leader of the free world?
posted by Atom Eyes at 8:23 AM on July 25, 2008
Cool! I take it, then, that all the fundies will be voting for him come November? After all, what better way to speed the advance of the Apocalypse than to elect The Beast himself as leader of the free world?
posted by Atom Eyes at 8:23 AM on July 25, 2008
If I wasn't at work, I'd photoshop up a Shelly Longboat right now just for kicks.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:32 AM on July 25, 2008
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:32 AM on July 25, 2008
... Obama is the Anti-Christ...
I think it's pretty obvious that Bush is the Anti-Christ.
posted by RussHy at 8:38 AM on July 25, 2008
I think it's pretty obvious that Bush is the Anti-Christ.
posted by RussHy at 8:38 AM on July 25, 2008
The thing is, Little River Band's best song is "Lonesome Loser", without a doubt. But their highest charting number was "Reminiscing", which peaked at #3. Life just isn't fair, that's why.
posted by dirtdirt at 8:54 AM on July 25, 2008
posted by dirtdirt at 8:54 AM on July 25, 2008
I think it's pretty obvious that Bush is the Anti-Christ.
Not quite. When you see what the American imperial cult has done with him, it becomes evident that Christ is, in fact, the Anti-Christ.
Bush is just a low-rent, corporate Constantine.
posted by felix betachat at 9:09 AM on July 25, 2008
Not quite. When you see what the American imperial cult has done with him, it becomes evident that Christ is, in fact, the Anti-Christ.
Bush is just a low-rent, corporate Constantine.
posted by felix betachat at 9:09 AM on July 25, 2008
I think it'd be pretty sweet if it turned out that Christ was also the Anti-Christ.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:21 AM on July 25, 2008
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:21 AM on July 25, 2008
Judas was the real Son of God / Christ, and sacrificed his life and became a historical pariah to prevent Jesus Anti-Christ from completely fulfilling his plan.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 9:26 AM on July 25, 2008
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 9:26 AM on July 25, 2008
If Christ actually repels himself, we might finally have the basis for an honest-to-God perpetual motion machine.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 9:27 AM on July 25, 2008
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 9:27 AM on July 25, 2008
"I think it'd be pretty sweet if it turned out that Christ was also the Anti-Christ."
We would know him by his goatee.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 9:29 AM on July 25, 2008
We would know him by his goatee.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 9:29 AM on July 25, 2008
It's remarkable that this stayed open beyond comment 1.
posted by nthdegx at 10:03 AM on July 25, 2008
posted by nthdegx at 10:03 AM on July 25, 2008
Two Christs enter, the fate of all humanity leaves.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 10:25 AM on July 25, 2008
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 10:25 AM on July 25, 2008
Metatown you'll always be
Home, sweet, home to me
Good ole Metatown
Metatown, hugemanatee
Metatown, hugemanatee
posted by danOstuporStar at 11:08 AM on July 25, 2008
Home, sweet, home to me
Good ole Metatown
Metatown, hugemanatee
Metatown, hugemanatee
posted by danOstuporStar at 11:08 AM on July 25, 2008
Two young newbies went to Metatown
Looking for a pony show
70kers never came back again
Guess they died of chops and plo
posted by cortex (staff) at 11:30 AM on July 25, 2008
Looking for a pony show
70kers never came back again
Guess they died of chops and plo
posted by cortex (staff) at 11:30 AM on July 25, 2008
I decided back in high school that I was the Neutral-Christ. It's all shades of grey with me. I mean, I'm black AND white. No good and evil, no light and dark. I'm here to bring you all into the shade.
Follow me, and we'll all be cool. Do-gooding is just too much work; and villainy is even worse. Let's just let each other be, share some tunes, everybody brings some food and something to drink; we'll hang out by the pool and it'll be chill. Just be aware of yourself, and try to minimize the burden you place on others. The only rule is be cool. If you're not cool, that's not cool. Dig?
posted by Eideteker at 12:14 PM on July 25, 2008
Follow me, and we'll all be cool. Do-gooding is just too much work; and villainy is even worse. Let's just let each other be, share some tunes, everybody brings some food and something to drink; we'll hang out by the pool and it'll be chill. Just be aware of yourself, and try to minimize the burden you place on others. The only rule is be cool. If you're not cool, that's not cool. Dig?
posted by Eideteker at 12:14 PM on July 25, 2008
Holy crap, Eideteker is The Dude.
Or possibly Bob. I'm not clear on this yet.
posted by cortex (staff) at 12:22 PM on July 25, 2008
Or possibly Bob. I'm not clear on this yet.
posted by cortex (staff) at 12:22 PM on July 25, 2008
I'm not even joking when I say I had a Church of Bob in high school. Members of the CoB believed in many deities, but also that those many deities were really just facets of the One True Bob. We were monopolytheists.
posted by Eideteker at 12:56 PM on July 25, 2008
posted by Eideteker at 12:56 PM on July 25, 2008
Text is likely to be stupid.
Great. Now I HATE all you fuckers again.
Thanks n00b.
posted by eyeballkid at 1:53 PM on July 25, 2008
Great. Now I HATE all you fuckers again.
Thanks n00b.
Hey! Don't blame me, that comment was the result of a highly-researched algorithm.
http:/projects.metafilter.com/1621/StupidFilter-Beta-Release
posted by cimbrog at 2:00 PM on July 25, 2008
Thanks n00b.
Hey! Don't blame me, that comment was the result of a highly-researched algorithm.
http:/projects.metafilter.com/1621/StupidFilter-Beta-Release
posted by cimbrog at 2:00 PM on July 25, 2008
I think if Obama was really the anti-Christ, he wouldn't have written God this as much as, maybe this.
posted by felix betachat at 2:26 PM on July 25, 2008
posted by felix betachat at 2:26 PM on July 25, 2008
"[Some comments removed. I'm just plain uncomfortable with highly personal he-said-she-said airing of grievances in public; this needs to be worked out elsewhere.]"
I guess that's why I cant' figure out what the heck is going on here...
posted by Jahaza at 2:48 PM on July 25, 2008
I guess that's why I cant' figure out what the heck is going on here...
posted by Jahaza at 2:48 PM on July 25, 2008
Now this...this might be art.
posted by voltairemodern at 9:48 PM on July 25, 2008
posted by voltairemodern at 9:48 PM on July 25, 2008
Mmm! Hacksaw soup!
I said send me a cake with file in it, not a file with a cake in it!
posted by StickyCarpet at 9:49 AM on July 26, 2008
I said send me a cake with file in it, not a file with a cake in it!
posted by StickyCarpet at 9:49 AM on July 26, 2008
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posted by jessamyn (staff) at 7:06 AM on July 24, 2008 [1 favorite]