Wolf wolf wolf moon hipster August 3, 2009 2:32 PM   Subscribe


This, coupled with the fact that Urban Outfitters is owned by Right-Wing lunatics, means that irony is officially this generation's parachute pants.
posted by shakespeherian at 2:35 PM on August 3, 2009 [24 favorites]


This will be closed, because it just isn't very important or relevant. Apologies.
posted by Meatbomb at 2:35 PM on August 3, 2009


*drops trou*

I only wear my 3WM.
posted by carsonb at 2:35 PM on August 3, 2009


I don't get it.
posted by electroboy at 2:36 PM on August 3, 2009


Is not. You can still buy it at Amazon.
posted by Metroid Baby at 2:38 PM on August 3, 2009


Amazon seems to still carry 3 Wolf Moon shirts (between $10 and $6 cheaper!) Not much of an exclusive!
posted by vespabelle at 2:38 PM on August 3, 2009


I can still get my tins of uranium ore from Amazon, right?
posted by Artw at 2:38 PM on August 3, 2009


It stops being cool in 3.. 2..
posted by starman at 2:40 PM on August 3, 2009


This, coupled with the fact that Urban Outfitters is owned by Right-Wing lunatics, means that irony is officially this generation's parachute pants.

Also from Urban Outiffters, fixies!
posted by dersins at 2:41 PM on August 3, 2009


Artw: Yes. Although you might have to shell out for used uranium.
posted by boo_radley at 2:42 PM on August 3, 2009


This will be favorited, because it is very important and relevant. Apologize.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 2:42 PM on August 3, 2009 [3 favorites]


How do I get into the cool kids club?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:44 PM on August 3, 2009


Also, I would like to take this opportunity to demonstrate that I predicted the wolf-shirt meme mayhem over two years ago, which is many thousands in internet meme years.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 2:47 PM on August 3, 2009 [2 favorites]


Um, what post? Your two links are the same, both outside our site here.
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 2:49 PM on August 3, 2009


Um, what post? Your two links are the same, both outside our site here.

Boy howdy did I ever fuck that one up. This post.
posted by dersins at 2:52 PM on August 3, 2009


My grandmother has a wall hanging that looks like the wolf shirt, except it's done in soft, soft wool.

I wonder if that will attract ladies to her home. Don't know why she would want that, though.
posted by Askiba at 3:02 PM on August 3, 2009 [1 favorite]


Also from Urban Outiffters, fixies!

How big of a ramp does a hipster need to pedal over a shark?
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 3:09 PM on August 3, 2009 [12 favorites]


Brandon Blatcher : How do I get into the cool kids club?

I figured out the pattern on their security cameras and the retinal locks they use are a joke, follow me and stay low and we should be inside in however long it takes to scale a brick wall, cut through some Concertina wire, eliminate four guards, rappel down into a decommissioned but still armed silo, and find where they've hidden the wet bar and the top shelf stuff.

I'd guess about six minutes.
posted by quin at 3:14 PM on August 3, 2009 [1 favorite]


I'm not totally convinced this is an important update, but I unfucked your post anyway.
posted by cortex (staff) at 3:27 PM on August 3, 2009 [2 favorites]


Oh, the stories I could tell...

You can't just drop that stinker in here and leave. C'mon, tell damnit.
posted by lekvar at 3:28 PM on August 3, 2009 [1 favorite]


I'm not totally convinced this is an important update

It's only the crucial linchpin of the survival of Western civilization, is all. So I guess if that's not important to you I can see why you're not convinced.
posted by dersins at 3:34 PM on August 3, 2009


shark, jumped
posted by Afroblanco at 3:38 PM on August 3, 2009


What? Come on, sharks are awesome!
posted by Artw at 3:43 PM on August 3, 2009


Can someone PLEASE explain to me the story behind why this shirt is well known? I've apparently missed the entire thing and nobody else seems to be in the same boat with me.
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 3:57 PM on August 3, 2009 [1 favorite]


Sharks are mega-awesome when they jump out of the water and take down a jumbo .
posted by goo at 4:00 PM on August 3, 2009


I need to stop and tie my shoelaces as this is getting dangerous.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 4:04 PM on August 3, 2009


I always thought of the 3 Wolf Moon as appealing to more of the inner right-wingnut. The perfect shirt for Ted Nugent to wear while hunting wolves with a crossbow and not a hint of irony. I'm more of a Space Wolf fan myself, and I do own that shirt (blog self-link). As for sharks, I put all my Shark Week links up at Monkeyfilter because I didn't want to be the center of a feeding frenzy here.
posted by wendell at 4:15 PM on August 3, 2009


I would think a better reason to stay away from Urban Outfitters is simply that it is all tasteless, overpriced crap.
Except when they have their big Maxwell Street Days sale. I found Jesus for 50 cents. True story. I found Jesus at Urban Outfitters for only fifty cents. Half a dollar. For Jesus. You can bet that I told everyone I met that day that I found Jesus at Urban Outfitters. And then I'd show 'em. I'd say "Do you know I found Jesus today?" Then I'd show 'em.
Jesus.
At Urban Outfitters.
So that one time, in that instance, Urban Outfitters sold tasteless, underpriced crap.
Of course I lost him at The Comedy Club after too many gin & tonics, but that's another story.
posted by Floydd at 4:21 PM on August 3, 2009


How do I get into the cool kids club?

I don't understand your question. You're already my spouse; what more entry do you need?
posted by Navelgazer at 4:28 PM on August 3, 2009


CitrusFreak12: It started with this, and morphed into this.

Pro-tip; you need to read the comments for the full effect.
posted by goo at 4:41 PM on August 3, 2009 [1 favorite]


Isn't it Shark Week?
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 4:41 PM on August 3, 2009 [1 favorite]


How do I get into the cool kids club?

if you are in nyc or l.a., have more money than everyone else you know and exclude other people to convince them of their being lukewarm.
if you are not in nyc or l.a., follow your leaders in nyc or l.a.
posted by the aloha at 4:51 PM on August 3, 2009


I've always associated "wolf" shirts with the kid in the back of bus who had a ton of dandruff and kept "lists". Does this kid shop at Urban Outfitters now? Who the fuck shops at Urban Outfitters, anyway?! Stop that!
posted by Brocktoon at 5:04 PM on August 3, 2009 [1 favorite]


If you really want to stay ahead of the curve, you can start here.
posted by jabberjaw at 5:24 PM on August 3, 2009 [2 favorites]


Who the fuck shops at Urban Outfitters, anyway?! Stop that!

That's the only place where I can find jeans to fit my no hips/small butt lower half without having to spend a shitload of money.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 5:36 PM on August 3, 2009


If you really want to stay ahead of the curve, you can start here.

Oh fuck yes.
posted by dersins at 5:41 PM on August 3, 2009 [6 favorites]


goo: "CitrusFreak12: It started with this, and morphed into this."

...and then became this.
posted by The corpse in the library at 5:44 PM on August 3, 2009


Don't forget about the three hippopotamus moon shirt.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 5:57 PM on August 3, 2009 [2 favorites]


Can I post this shirt here now?
posted by abc123xyzinfinity at 6:04 PM on August 3, 2009


Wow, that Choice Shirts site has both an apparently-unironic "America: Love it or Leave it" and a shirt celebrating Malcolm X as an "American Hero".
posted by DU at 6:22 PM on August 3, 2009


So it started as one of those "lol mass funny fake reviews" on amazon.com, and then... the meme actually crossed over into the real world?

Yes?
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 6:35 PM on August 3, 2009 [1 favorite]


fuck ===I'm tired of this....
posted by HuronBob at 6:40 PM on August 3, 2009


Don't forget about the three hippopotamus Hippopoticorn moon shirt.

ftfy.
posted by YoBananaBoy at 7:51 PM on August 3, 2009


This is one of those things that I never would have known about at all if it weren't for MetaFilter.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:39 PM on August 3, 2009 [5 favorites]


Now, if only Urban Outfitters would start stocking Tuscan Whole Milk, then I could say hipsters had truly ruined *everything* good.
posted by Tesseractive at 10:12 PM on August 3, 2009 [1 favorite]


"Wolf wolf wolf moon hipster" is now the name of my mono-synth ambient noise fusion duo.
posted by gc at 10:54 PM on August 3, 2009


Urban Outfitters is also famously shady and doubledealing with it's designers so now I have ANOTHER reason to never shop there.

Plus, they took over the one decent diner in San Diego. A pox on them! A pox!
posted by The Whelk at 11:18 PM on August 3, 2009


small butt

That's one o' them "high class" problems, like having two girlfriends.
posted by Brocktoon at 11:30 PM on August 3, 2009


I recently encountered somebody dressed as a rightwing nutcase, complete with wolf-moon shirt. And I, and the people around me, assumed the person was a rightwing nutcase.
I'm not sure what lesson to draw from this.
Maybe I should have had my irony translator with me.
posted by jouke at 12:29 AM on August 4, 2009


First the hipsters appropriated meshbacks, then giant belt-buckles and now, holiest of holies, the wolf shirts? Dear god, a right-thinking nutcase will simply have nothing left to wear, lest he's mistaken for one of those gotdam metrosexshul hipster types.
If urban outfitters starts selling nascar gear, however, I think all self-respecting nutcases should go straight back to burlap. Or leather chaps, err. wait. no.
posted by Cold Lurkey at 5:52 AM on August 4, 2009


Hey, has anybody seen my VOTE FOR PEDRO shirt?
posted by Spatch at 5:56 AM on August 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


I suppose in 2039 you can buy uranium in any corner drugstore, but here in 2009 it's a little hard to come by!
posted by XMLicious at 6:20 AM on August 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


WHERE'S MY GODDAM BEDAZZLER??
posted by Devils Rancher at 7:56 AM on August 4, 2009


This will be closed, because it just isn't very important or relevant. Apologies.

Did I miss the part where you were made a mod?
posted by mkultra at 8:10 AM on August 4, 2009


Meatbomb is a mod on the astral plane, where the thread has indeed been closed. Project your astral spirit and see for yourself.
posted by languagehat at 8:16 AM on August 4, 2009 [3 favorites]


don't take the piss languagehat, some of us actually do tha... oh, wait... he's right, it is...
posted by russm at 9:12 AM on August 4, 2009


I agree that if Urban Outfitters really did make (or try to make) the 3 wolf shift an exclusive property that if its possible, the shark has jumped the shark. That store needs to just give it up already.
posted by zennoshinjou at 9:13 AM on August 4, 2009


T-shirt wolves are cool, but what about wolves that can do endoscopies? That logo on a tshirt would be the coolest ever!
posted by TedW at 9:29 AM on August 4, 2009


In South Africa, shark jumps you!

And by jumps, I mean jumps and eats, and by you, I mean seal.

AIR JAWS.
posted by SpiffyRob at 9:36 AM on August 4, 2009


I got mine at a flea market in upstate New York, you know, to be authentic.
posted by swift at 9:41 AM on August 4, 2009


Did I miss the part where you were made a mod?

If you do not start participating in this website a little more attentively you will find yourself on secret astral probabtion, mkultra, achtung! Danger point!
posted by Meatbomb at 10:59 AM on August 4, 2009


Can someone PLEASE explain to me the story behind why this shirt is well known?

This should all be obvious if you just take a look at the shirt. It is awesome.
posted by Pollomacho at 11:11 AM on August 4, 2009


Next big comeback: Custom airbrush t-shirts. You heard it here first.
posted by mendel at 9:20 AM on August 5, 2009


Next big comeback? Airbrushed T's are already big in some areas.

*scoots air compressor under bed with shoe*
posted by lekvar at 9:38 AM on August 5, 2009


Jabberjaw, seriously, I looked at every t-shirt on that page and man, I can't even find one that isn't so sincere as to defeat any attempts at irony I could muster.

And this is coming from someone who bought a 1980s prom dress with a gold sequinned bodice at the thrift store this weekend."

This is why I don't shop at Urban Outfitters, actually. I can't deny that they're good at pegging trends, though. A friend of mine cuts holes in his thrift store t-shirts and wears another t-shirt underneath them. We all teased him when UO started started selling this. For $40. On sale.
posted by Juliet Banana at 10:39 AM on August 5, 2009


Questions about this:

1. Why is that raccoon so huge? It looks to be quite a bit larger than the dogs. Is that what they're like in the south?
2. Why would anyone cut the legs off of a giant raccoon and place it on a 6-foot pole?
posted by SpiffyRob at 11:04 AM on August 5, 2009 [1 favorite]


SpiffyRob: Questions about this:

Surely those aren't the only two questions you had about this?
posted by shakespeherian at 11:10 AM on August 5, 2009


Well, that was kind of the intentional misdirection of it, yes, but four years of school in rural Ohio has me all too familiar with the premise, unfortunately.

Plus: That is a simply horridly designed shirt. Just crap, top to bottom.
posted by SpiffyRob at 12:41 PM on August 5, 2009


I'm still agog at the fact that there are 1,052 five star reviews for that wolf shirt on Amazon.

Also - wtf Native American Cats?!! From that Choice Tshirts link. Just so deeply wrong/weird, that.
posted by batgrlHG at 3:42 PM on August 5, 2009 [1 favorite]


I want Native American Cats so much. If loving it is wrong, I don't want to be right.
posted by mippy at 6:17 AM on August 6, 2009


WHAT
posted by mippy at 6:21 AM on August 6, 2009


The Stink. September 11th, 2001.

We will never forget.
posted by Juliet Banana at 7:15 AM on August 6, 2009


/me shakes fist at Juliet Banana.

I was going to make that exact same joke, but got called into a meeting.

*shake shake shake*
posted by SpiffyRob at 8:44 AM on August 6, 2009


Apparently we are terrible taste twins.
posted by Juliet Banana at 8:59 AM on August 6, 2009


That's weird that so many people latched onto the Native American cats shirt. I hadn't read any more comments when I clicked the link to that site, and I pretty much randomly found that same one and emailed it to a friend. I love it.
posted by glycolized at 6:16 PM on August 14, 2009


Well, you load up the gallery page, not expecting much, maybe some kitsch, then
POW
You get sucker-punched right in your sense of aesthetics. Dazed and reeling, you look around, trying to find what has caused you such violence.

You can't hear them coming, as their feet are wrapped in deer-skin moccasins, making no sound. The last thing you see before you pass out from the pain is three pairs of eyes growing ever nearer.
posted by lekvar at 10:18 AM on August 15, 2009


I have no idea why the cats shirt jumped out at me - probably something to do with the "thou shalt not dress cats in clothes" decree that I've gotten when I once put a shirt on our cat - it's been voted down in our house as cruel, though the cat looked very funny in the shirt and didn't seem to mind too much. (He's a sucker for any attention.)

Also that feathered headdress would only last 2 seconds on any real cat before it would be gleefully eaten.
posted by batgrlHG at 12:03 AM on August 20, 2009


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