nax, metafilter nax August 10, 2009 10:02 AM   Subscribe

I need one of these. For all those meetups that I miss am planning to go to.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/t_zero/3776421249/in/photostream/
posted by nax to MetaFilter-Related at 10:02 AM (51 comments total) 6 users marked this as a favorite

What does the photostream link provide?

Kronos_to_Earth is the user identified by the card, by the way.
posted by filthy light thief at 10:08 AM on August 10, 2009


Ok, that's pretty fuckin' cool.
posted by jonmc at 10:09 AM on August 10, 2009


Want.
posted by rtha at 10:16 AM on August 10, 2009


"Excuse me ma'am, I'm from the Internet."
"Could I see your ID?"
posted by smackfu at 10:17 AM on August 10, 2009 [7 favorites]


And who confiscates the IDs when a user is banned?
posted by Burhanistan at 10:28 AM on August 10, 2009


Here's the shortened link for those wanting to send this on Twitter:

http://flic.kr/p/6KH9tc
posted by vacapinta at 10:29 AM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]


You mean you didn't get your RFID chip at the cabal-only 25th anniversary meetup this spring?
posted by hermitosis at 10:39 AM on August 10, 2009


Where do you get the cartoon avatars?
posted by 517 at 10:41 AM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]


I think Kronos to Earth is a member of the Scooby-doo Fanclub, who give you 6 sets of those shifty-looking cartoon eyes when you join.
posted by filthy light thief at 10:55 AM on August 10, 2009


LADY: "Are you the Police?"

JAKE & ELWOOD: "No, Ma'am, we're MeFites."
posted by Nick Verstayne at 11:23 AM on August 10, 2009 [4 favorites]


LADY: "Are you the Police?"

JAKE & ELWOODCORTEX & ASTRO ZOMBIE: "No, Ma'am, we're MeFites."

ftfy.
posted by wendell at 11:28 AM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]


I was going to go with Cortex & Jonmc. I don't believe in Zom
posted by Nick Verstayne at 11:32 AM on August 10, 2009


Where do you get the cartoon avatars?

Here, I think.
posted by mikepop at 11:35 AM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]


Even though having one of these in my wallet would mean I had passes a point of no return in terms of MeFi nerddom I deeply, deeply want one of these.
posted by Kattullus at 11:35 AM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]


I'm going to start up a site selling fake novelty MeFi ID's to the over 90k crowd, listing them as having a 30-60k user ID.

What?
posted by djgh at 11:43 AM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]


I love 'IdentiFiMe' = brilliant, meta and totally MeFi.
posted by iamkimiam at 11:45 AM on August 10, 2009


Even though having one of these in my wallet would mean I had passes a point of no return in terms of MeFi nerddom I deeply, deeply want one of these.

Oh, a wallet ID is certainly indicative of owning property in Nerddom, but I'd say something more drastic like a MeFi microchip tracker implant would be properly passing the point of no return. Even that could be removed, though, so perhaps it could be wired to a small charge that would be sewn in the chest cavity next to the heart. Remove your MeFi Locator and your ribcage explodes.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:45 AM on August 10, 2009


Remove your MeFi Locator and your ribcage explodes.

This is pretty dramatic. But I had my MeFi Locatoroto wired directly to the wrought iron harness I wear around my neck and shoulders. Should I get banned, or anyone tell a lie, the Apparatus is rigged to chop off my right hand.
posted by carsonb at 11:57 AM on August 10, 2009


My MeFi Blue Rewards Cards gives me an automatic 5% discount on all plates, beans, butter, portobello mushrooms, grilled cheese sandwiches, cameras, and taters.
posted by The Whelk at 12:15 PM on August 10, 2009 [8 favorites]


I don't believe in Zom


Careful there, Astro Zombie, like Tinkerbell, is kept alive only by our hearts and belief in him.
posted by The Whelk at 12:16 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]


I keep thinking I need to make up some business cards, but I can't imagine many situations where I'd actually be giving one to someone.

Flashing photo ID, though, hmm.
posted by cortex (staff) at 12:21 PM on August 10, 2009


Yes Virginia, there really is an Astro Zombie.
posted by JeffK at 12:23 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]


Isn't it neat how much fun a simple lamination machine brings into your life?
posted by Rhomboid at 12:49 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]


Please please please I really need this.

Matt, I will pay $5 for this. I humbly suggest you up the entry fee to $10, but it includes this excellent thing.
posted by Meatbomb at 12:50 PM on August 10, 2009


I want mine to say "I'm a friend of Matt H".
posted by scottymac at 12:58 PM on August 10, 2009


Designed my own, using many of Kronos_to_Earth's ideas, but messed up the "IntentiFiMe" watermark (and I did it in a quick-and-dirty no-layer image editor, so I'd have to start from the beginning to do a blank). As for MY cartoon avatar, you'd have to have a connection to an A-list webcomicker to get one of those. (And then cut off the superhero costume he drew you into).
posted by wendell at 1:36 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]


Jim Rockford had one of these in Season 4, but he got beat up by goons later in the episode.
posted by demiurge at 2:01 PM on August 10, 2009


Because I can't allow myself to be identified if caught, I rely on a system of secret handshakes and flashed hand signs.

But if I were to go with a printed card I would opt for something blank on both sides, that way when I handed it to someone and they looked confused, I'd could just nod knowingly and raise one eyebrow as conspiratorially as possible before explaining at length the very real risk posed to all of us by the owl menace.

This is why people on the bus hate me.
posted by quin at 2:05 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]


Dude that's cool gnarly.
posted by cashman at 2:18 PM on August 10, 2009


I keep thinking I need to make up some business cards, but I can't imagine many situations where I'd actually be giving one to someone.

I actually did make business cards to go with my most recent job search.

I was hired by the first family I gave the card to. Then I gave one to my mom.

This is a boring story and the moral is that now I have 100 business cards sitting on my desk.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 2:24 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]


I think ideally it would come with a little pin badge, too.
posted by kmennie at 2:28 PM on August 10, 2009


I keep thinking I need to make up some business cards

When you have a job, your BOSS makes them, which is so awesome. That said, I've never had one, I just give out moo cards or tell people to google my name/username.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 2:43 PM on August 10, 2009


Oh, that's brilliant.
posted by lekvar at 2:50 PM on August 10, 2009


Not sure why the URL showed up in the post instead of as highlighted link. That's what I get for not previewing. Just cut-and-pasted weird.
posted by nax at 3:00 PM on August 10, 2009


Well, I have a job and my boss never made me business cards. My boss is a cheapskate, though. Uncle Sam, that rat bastard. Five bucks gets me 500 cards from VistaPrint.
posted by fixedgear at 4:28 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]


Alright, I've stopped shaking now...(I checked in to upload some photos a while ago and ...heavens to betsy....) Thank you very much, everyone. My muse came back, I guess.
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 4:30 PM on August 10, 2009


I'm thinking back... the last time I was given business cards at my job was 3 jobs and 20+ years ago, but that was the last job I had where I dealt with anybody who wasn't an employee of the same company (and THAT was in Accounts Payable where most my contacts involved telling Accounts Receivable people why they wouldn't be getting paid this week... I suggested adding "writer of quality fantasy fiction" to the card but my boss didn't go for it. I had ideas for my cow orkers... "Financial Gravedigger: Knows where the bodies are buried" "No Accounting for Taste" "Practicing Human Relations from the Outside" "Accounts Decievable" "Survived the 60s: Please Speak Slowly" "Computer Science Is NOT Rocket Science, We Crash Much More Often" and "Mr. Leach (his real name), not related to Robin, not Rich, not Famous, not Blood-Sucking"... good memories)
posted by wendell at 4:45 PM on August 10, 2009


A friend of mine has been a stone-mason, a chocolate-factory worker, a scenery painter, an art Restorationist, a legal assistant, an art archivist, a copy-editor, a farm hand, and the manager of a successful coffee shop.

His business card says "Useful"
posted by The Whelk at 5:11 PM on August 10, 2009 [4 favorites]


Oh! also a nanny, caterer, and elder care worker.
posted by The Whelk at 5:14 PM on August 10, 2009


I made up personal calling cards when a big bank bought the bank I work for. They just have my name, email addy and cell phone number. I've been handing them out to friends who have been given termination notices so they know how to stay in touch :(
posted by ersatzkat at 5:37 PM on August 10, 2009


Here's the MetaFilter User License, and here's the layered Photoshop file, if you'd like to make your own. You'll need a picture of yourself and OCR, or an equivalent-looking font.
posted by mattdidthat at 5:45 PM on August 10, 2009 [12 favorites]


mattdidthat, I am outdone. *bows and sweeps hat from pate* THAT is cool. And I just found I had the resolution set to only 72 pixels/inch. Oh, for pete's sake.
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 6:44 PM on August 10, 2009


I'm going to start up a site selling fake novelty MeFi ID's to the over 90k crowd, listing them as having a 30-60k user ID.

Yes, thank you. I would like to purchase this.
posted by jeoc at 7:28 PM on August 10, 2009


I like yours better Kronos_to_Earth, mattdidthat's is a little too, um, American looking. Though the 2D barcode or maybe better a qrcode would be a good addition.
posted by Mitheral at 8:34 PM on August 10, 2009


Thank you, Mitheral, and Ooooo, qrcode!

I'd like to make the photoshop file available, but the only place I know that will accept a .psd file (called eSnips) put me through over hour of login refusal/frustration and I Give Up on the place. Where is another site?
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 9:31 PM on August 10, 2009


I prefer to remain unscannable.

OR... my ID picture would be recursive, causing the whole system to melt.

never mind, it's late, I'm sleepy.

posted by not_on_display at 9:54 PM on August 10, 2009


Actually, recursivity was the property used to melt Kronos at the end of the movie I took my screen name fr

*hides under desk*
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 11:09 PM on August 10, 2009


posted by Kronos_to_Earth mattdidthat, I am outdone. *bows and sweeps hat from pate* THAT is cool.

Aw, shucks. Thank you. I was just expanding on your excellent idea and design!
posted by mattdidthat at 11:15 PM on August 10, 2009


Kronos_to_Earth: I have some hosting if you want to put the file up. Just meMail me.
posted by odinsdream at 9:47 AM on August 11, 2009


I don't know if this is the right thread, but I have to share this onsite *somewhere.*

I'm wearing my "Everybody needs a hug" shirt today, as it is a work-day, and man, when I'm at work there are quite a few moments when everybody really DOES need a hug.

So, I'm driving home, la la la, and I see my ex-husband (Hi, Kattullus!) walking down (or rather up) College Hill...

IN A METAFILTER T-SHIRT.

Internet, you have officially gone too far.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 2:24 PM on August 11, 2009 [1 favorite]


Ah, splendid! odinsdream has kindly provided hosting for a layered Photoshop file of the card; if you would like to put one together, the .psd is available here.
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 5:40 PM on August 12, 2009


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