Susan Hired A Boss August 10, 2009 12:03 PM Subscribe
Remember Susan? Looks like she's employed.
She hired these guys, and compares her new job to being a mini Robert Scoble. Let's just hope her new bosses don't care about accuracy, since she didn't quite get the Scoble link correct on her blog. And for the curious, yes, it appears her bosses have the requisite penises.
She hired these guys, and compares her new job to being a mini Robert Scoble. Let's just hope her new bosses don't care about accuracy, since she didn't quite get the Scoble link correct on her blog. And for the curious, yes, it appears her bosses have the requisite penises.
I like how this hot-shot promoter and marketer joined a company that sounds like a medieval disease. Scorm can be cure only by the touch of a privy counsellor's scrotum or something like that.
posted by atrazine at 12:08 PM on August 10, 2009 [16 favorites]
posted by atrazine at 12:08 PM on August 10, 2009 [16 favorites]
And ready to be really jealous? Because here’s what my new job is going to be – product evangelist.
I'm afraid that my lack of jealousy is profound.
posted by Halloween Jack at 12:08 PM on August 10, 2009 [35 favorites]
I'm afraid that my lack of jealousy is profound.
posted by Halloween Jack at 12:08 PM on August 10, 2009 [35 favorites]
...compares her new job to being a mini Robert Scoble.
I'm not familiar with this kind of thing, so I have to ask: Is this a good thing? Is it supposed to be better or worse than being a regular-size Robert Scoble?
posted by Dr Dracator at 12:13 PM on August 10, 2009
I'm not familiar with this kind of thing, so I have to ask: Is this a good thing? Is it supposed to be better or worse than being a regular-size Robert Scoble?
posted by Dr Dracator at 12:13 PM on August 10, 2009
Scorm can be cure only by the touch of a privy counsellor's scrotum mini-Scoble
posted by DU at 12:14 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by DU at 12:14 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
From the FAQ:
Do you produce SCORM?
No. SCORM is produced by ADL, a research group sponsored by the United States Department of Defense (DoD). Rustici Software is an independent company that specializes in helping other companies become SCORM conformant.
Why am I imagining this being read by Troy McClure? I'm pretty sure there's either a Simpsons or Futurama quote along these lines.
posted by DU at 12:16 PM on August 10, 2009 [21 favorites]
Do you produce SCORM?
No. SCORM is produced by ADL, a research group sponsored by the United States Department of Defense (DoD). Rustici Software is an independent company that specializes in helping other companies become SCORM conformant.
Why am I imagining this being read by Troy McClure? I'm pretty sure there's either a Simpsons or Futurama quote along these lines.
posted by DU at 12:16 PM on August 10, 2009 [21 favorites]
I'm not familiar with this kind of thing, so I have to ask: Is this a good thing? Is it supposed to be better or worse than being a regular-size Robert Scoble?
He's apparently a Microsoft blogger. Based on his picture on wikipedia, he is a little thick around the middle, so mini might be good. You know, just for health reasons.
posted by mr_roboto at 12:17 PM on August 10, 2009
He's apparently a Microsoft blogger. Based on his picture on wikipedia, he is a little thick around the middle, so mini might be good. You know, just for health reasons.
posted by mr_roboto at 12:17 PM on August 10, 2009
That SCORM.com page is full of unintentional hilarity. "If unfamiliar with SCORM, it’s best to have a basic understanding of what it does."
Hah! It's like a parody, but I don't think it's meant to be...
posted by mr_roboto at 12:19 PM on August 10, 2009
Hah! It's like a parody, but I don't think it's meant to be...
posted by mr_roboto at 12:19 PM on August 10, 2009
I was gettin' zerged by scorms until I set up a coupla plasma towers, took 'em right out.
posted by klangklangston at 12:22 PM on August 10, 2009 [11 favorites]
posted by klangklangston at 12:22 PM on August 10, 2009 [11 favorites]
kekekekekekekkek SCOOOOOOOOOOORM!
posted by Loto at 12:26 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by Loto at 12:26 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
In my head, I pronounce "Scobleizer" as "skuh-bleezer!"
posted by Metroid Baby at 12:27 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by Metroid Baby at 12:27 PM on August 10, 2009
Cool. It's a crappy job market these days, so it's nice to hear that someone was able to land a job they're excited about, thanks for the update!
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:29 PM on August 10, 2009 [5 favorites]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:29 PM on August 10, 2009 [5 favorites]
SCORM compliance is a relatively big deal in higher ed circles. A lot of vendors release either applications or course packs that have to adhere to a standard so it can either operate with, or be imported into Learning Management Systems (like Blackboard, Moodle, Sakai etc.).
Fairly big marketplace around it (including the open source community) which seems to be increasing every year.
That being said, I've never heard of Rustici. Nor do I care about Susan's little PR stunt. Best of luck to her, but outside of Vint Cerf, evangelist positions appear to filled with people that add a certain dash of panache to the company they work for with very little substance.
posted by purephase at 12:34 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
Fairly big marketplace around it (including the open source community) which seems to be increasing every year.
That being said, I've never heard of Rustici. Nor do I care about Susan's little PR stunt. Best of luck to her, but outside of Vint Cerf, evangelist positions appear to filled with people that add a certain dash of panache to the company they work for with very little substance.
posted by purephase at 12:34 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
It's time for me to say it, "SCORM doesn't suck..."
I am a patient man. Slow to anger, slow to annoy. Frankly, some mistake my calm demeanor for apathy. But now they’ve done it. The folks on Twitter (and elsewhere in the community) have made enough comments about SCORM that I’m annoyed. That’s right, I’m actually a little irritated.
It helps if you read it out in this voice. Or this one.
BTW, SCORM does suck. Like a Hoover. Like -- oh, wait. Phone. "Hellph{#`%${%&`+'${`%&NO CARRIER"
posted by maudlin at 12:34 PM on August 10, 2009
I am a patient man. Slow to anger, slow to annoy. Frankly, some mistake my calm demeanor for apathy. But now they’ve done it. The folks on Twitter (and elsewhere in the community) have made enough comments about SCORM that I’m annoyed. That’s right, I’m actually a little irritated.
It helps if you read it out in this voice. Or this one.
BTW, SCORM does suck. Like a Hoover. Like -- oh, wait. Phone. "Hellph{#`%${%&`+'${`%&NO CARRIER"
posted by maudlin at 12:34 PM on August 10, 2009
Remember when Kirk fought that Scorm motherfucker? He kicked it in the crotch as I recall. Oh no, it was blocked. Anyway, point is, "Rustici" is scormian for "crotch."
PS, the title on the youtube post is fairly accurate.
posted by Mister_A at 12:35 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
PS, the title on the youtube post is fairly accurate.
posted by Mister_A at 12:35 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
Hey, you're lucky she condescended to write (down) to you at all.
posted by Cranberry at 12:46 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by Cranberry at 12:46 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
"And ready to be really jealous? Because here’s what my new job is going to be – product evangelist. Yep…"
Great! She can evangelize the product to people who like their evangelists juvenile, cutesy, and overly familiar.
posted by applemeat at 12:51 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
Great! She can evangelize the product to people who like their evangelists juvenile, cutesy, and overly familiar.
posted by applemeat at 12:51 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
Another post that should be a parody, but isn't: riding a trend
"Have you latched on to the miniskirt of your industry?"
posted by cjorgensen at 12:54 PM on August 10, 2009
"Have you latched on to the miniskirt of your industry?"
posted by cjorgensen at 12:54 PM on August 10, 2009
I had forgotten about her, and, I now find, enjoying that blissful state.
posted by everichon at 1:00 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by everichon at 1:00 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
Hope it doesn't suck for her.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 1:01 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by JohnnyGunn at 1:01 PM on August 10, 2009
Hey, you're lucky she condescended to write (down) to you at all.
In 2009, it's not condescension, it's evangelizing a value-added paradigm delivery solution.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 1:08 PM on August 10, 2009 [10 favorites]
In 2009, it's not condescension, it's evangelizing a value-added paradigm delivery solution.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 1:08 PM on August 10, 2009 [10 favorites]
SCORMtrulecent.
posted by hellojed at 1:11 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by hellojed at 1:11 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
Isn't it generally accepted that Product Evangelists are people who already possess deep industry experience and knowledge, and whose primary asset is their credibility?
posted by mkultra at 1:13 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by mkultra at 1:13 PM on August 10, 2009
Isn't it generally accepted that Product Evangelists are people who already possess deep industry experience and knowledge, and whose primary asset is their credibility?
Actually the role of a Product Evangelist is simple:
* Suggest professional white background.
* Sit back and watch money roll in.
posted by eyeballkid at 1:17 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
Actually the role of a Product Evangelist is simple:
* Suggest professional white background.
* Sit back and watch money roll in.
posted by eyeballkid at 1:17 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
Isn't it generally accepted that Product Evangelists are people who already possess deep industry experience and knowledge, and whose primary asset is their credibility?
That's what I thought as well.
posted by brundlefly at 1:24 PM on August 10, 2009
That's what I thought as well.
posted by brundlefly at 1:24 PM on August 10, 2009
MKUltra, not really. It's advertising, in a large sense, so enthusiasm, charisma, and endurance substitute nicely for credibility, related experience, and domain knowledge. The people who make evaluations of a product evangelist based on the latter set are a smaller fraction of the populace and generally do not need to be led about by the nose.
So, you could spend a great deal of time and effort finding someone of the latter sort and having to pay them quite a bit, or you can find someone who is merely sharp and can sell your crap.
posted by adipocere at 1:24 PM on August 10, 2009
So, you could spend a great deal of time and effort finding someone of the latter sort and having to pay them quite a bit, or you can find someone who is merely sharp and can sell your crap.
posted by adipocere at 1:24 PM on August 10, 2009
You mean the ShamWow guy doesn’t have an advanced engineering degree in Comparative Textile Absorption Properties?!
posted by applemeat at 1:34 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by applemeat at 1:34 PM on August 10, 2009
Let me evangelize a bit about SCORM. It is your course's html pages and resources zipped with a stupid XML file that tries to tell in which order the student/trainee has to view them and conditions on when he can proceed. 'SCORM-player' is a CMS-system that can implement those conditions and play those sequences. The cleverest thing that the learning environment can do with SCORM metadata is to ignore it. Pedagogically, it is murder. No, no, no, it is murder. It's not succulent, tasty or kind. It's structure for no reason and structure for no reason is murder.
posted by Free word order! at 1:34 PM on August 10, 2009 [10 favorites]
posted by Free word order! at 1:34 PM on August 10, 2009 [10 favorites]
"And ready to be really jealous? Because here’s what my new job is going to be – product evangelist."
THE POWER OF SCORM COMPELS YOU!
posted by klangklangston at 1:40 PM on August 10, 2009 [4 favorites]
THE POWER OF SCORM COMPELS YOU!
posted by klangklangston at 1:40 PM on August 10, 2009 [4 favorites]
A regrettable, preventable tragedy. My sympathies to all involved.
.
posted by boo_radley at 1:43 PM on August 10, 2009 [5 favorites]
.
posted by boo_radley at 1:43 PM on August 10, 2009 [5 favorites]
"If unfamiliar with SCORM, it’s best to have a basic understanding of what it does."
The power of SCORM compels you.
posted by quin at 1:43 PM on August 10, 2009
The power of SCORM compels you.
posted by quin at 1:43 PM on August 10, 2009
On non preview, seriously klangklangston? Three minutes faster than me?
Bastard.
posted by quin at 1:47 PM on August 10, 2009
Bastard.
posted by quin at 1:47 PM on August 10, 2009
You mean the ShamWow guy doesn’t have an advanced engineering degree in Comparative Textile Absorption Properties?!
he may, however, have a degree in hookerbiting, or sexworkermastication science or whatever the fuck.
posted by jonmc at 1:51 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
he may, however, have a degree in hookerbiting, or sexworkermastication science or whatever the fuck.
posted by jonmc at 1:51 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
Pedagogically, it is murder. No, no, no, it is murder. It's not succulent, tasty or kind. It's structure for no reason and structure for no reason is murder.
Totally. My short experience with Moodle has taught me that SCORM sucks, massively.
posted by Meatbomb at 1:56 PM on August 10, 2009
Totally. My short experience with Moodle has taught me that SCORM sucks, massively.
posted by Meatbomb at 1:56 PM on August 10, 2009
I thought SCORM compliance was about being able to produce games in lucasarts' point-and-click engine.
posted by shmegegge at 2:01 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by shmegegge at 2:01 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
Well, I was in front of my ministry, and I said, SCORM, if we can just come up with something to say, something that will allow us to triumph in this war of good and evil, something that will bring just a few folks over to our side, don't you think you could help out your loyal servant with something like that? Something that would bring in a few more donations for the important work we do? And SCORM said to me, THE POWER OF SCORM COMPELS YOU, and I said, his will be done, SCORM, his will be done.
posted by klangklangston at 2:02 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by klangklangston at 2:02 PM on August 10, 2009
How perfectly scormulent. She shoots, she scorms. When the One Great Scormer comes to write against your name, it matters not if you won or lost, but how you played the game. Scorma Scorma Scorma Chameleon, she comes and goes. I'll have the Chicken Scorma. Instant Scorma's going to get you. I find that lime juice is a reliable scormbutic. Tropical Scorm Susan. See you at the Scorm Palace!
posted by Sidhedevil at 2:03 PM on August 10, 2009 [5 favorites]
posted by Sidhedevil at 2:03 PM on August 10, 2009 [5 favorites]
"he may, however, have a degree in hookerbiting, or sexworkermastication science or whatever the fuck."
His M.A. stands for Marv Albert.
posted by klangklangston at 2:05 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
His M.A. stands for Marv Albert.
posted by klangklangston at 2:05 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
he may, however, have a degree in hookerbiting, or sexworkermastication science...
Those are professional certifications, not degrees.
posted by Mister_A at 2:07 PM on August 10, 2009
Those are professional certifications, not degrees.
posted by Mister_A at 2:07 PM on August 10, 2009
Here's some SCORM evangelizing, free of charge:
I think scorm is a pretty cool guy. eh has alot of xml and doesn't afraid of anything.
posted by ignignokt at 2:15 PM on August 10, 2009 [5 favorites]
I think scorm is a pretty cool guy. eh has alot of xml and doesn't afraid of anything.
posted by ignignokt at 2:15 PM on August 10, 2009 [5 favorites]
SCORM is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life.
posted by brundlefly at 2:21 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by brundlefly at 2:21 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
HE SHOOTS, HE SCORMS!!
posted by jonmc at 2:22 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by jonmc at 2:22 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
I had a bit of a scorm that turned into a mini-scoble, but luckily the dermatologist had a cream for that.
posted by klangklangston at 2:33 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by klangklangston at 2:33 PM on August 10, 2009
I had a bit of a scorm that turned into a mini-scoble, but luckily the dermatologist had a cream for that.
Neoscormin?
posted by clearly at 2:42 PM on August 10, 2009 [6 favorites]
Neoscormin?
posted by clearly at 2:42 PM on August 10, 2009 [6 favorites]
_____ _____ ____ _____ __ __ _
/ ____|/ ____/ __ \| __ \| \/ | |
| (___ | | | | | | |__) | \ / | |
\___ \| | | | | | _ /| |\/| | |
____) | |___| |__| | | \ \| | | |_|
|_____/ \_____\____/|_| \_\_| |_(_)
posted by everichon at 2:55 PM on August 10, 2009 [7 favorites] SCORM is produced by ADL, a research group sponsored by the United States Department of Defense (DoD). Rustici Software is an independent company that specializes in helping other companies become SCORM conformant.
Don't believe it. Just when you think you've paid your way out of SCORM conformance, suddenly you find out she's actually a SCORM conformance informant!
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 2:58 PM on August 10, 2009
Don't believe it. Just when you think you've paid your way out of SCORM conformance, suddenly you find out she's actually a SCORM conformance informant!
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 2:58 PM on August 10, 2009
MetaFilter: science or whatever the fuck.
posted by loquacious at 3:03 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by loquacious at 3:03 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
Just when you think you've paid your way out of SCORM conformance, suddenly you find out she's actually a SCORM conformance informant!
Inscormer!
You no say daddy me scorm me I'll go blame,
A licky boom boom down!
posted by Metroid Baby at 3:07 PM on August 10, 2009 [5 favorites]
Inscormer!
You no say daddy me scorm me I'll go blame,
A licky boom boom down!
posted by Metroid Baby at 3:07 PM on August 10, 2009 [5 favorites]
METAL SCORM
posted by adamdschneider at 3:16 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by adamdschneider at 3:16 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
Looks like someone has already started to proselytize SCORM via wikipedia. It sounds as soul-rending as free word order! described it.
posted by filthy light thief at 3:19 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by filthy light thief at 3:19 PM on August 10, 2009
Susan K. Mooney Will You Please Go Now!
posted by MoreForMad at 3:25 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by MoreForMad at 3:25 PM on August 10, 2009
The Requisite Penises would be a great band name. or dance troup name. or gang name. or something.
posted by jonmc at 3:32 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by jonmc at 3:32 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
Wanna know what I'll bet? I’ll bet that every one of you is wondering what Sharable Content Object Reference Model (SCORM) is! I know sure was, before Godin (that’s my dog!) and I met up with Mike and Tim! Well, wonder no more, because I guess you could safely say that I'm not the mysterious type! I'm a no nuance kind of gal! (How can I keep innovation this good a secret when I'm busy being a dynamic, take charge achiever?) So let's have at it, as I always say (drumroll please!): SCORM (Sorry, tummy rumblers--it’s not a Scrumptious Scone with Scoops of Scream Scheese—but look on the bright side, it won’t ruin your appetite for supper!) just so happens to be none other than a collection of standards and specifications for web-based e-learning. (Hey! Kinda like you’re doing right now!)
posted by applemeat at 3:57 PM on August 10, 2009 [4 favorites]
posted by applemeat at 3:57 PM on August 10, 2009 [4 favorites]
Damn Metroid Baby dropping 12 inches of Scorm made me laugh out loud.
posted by Glee at 3:58 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by Glee at 3:58 PM on August 10, 2009
Imagine how creative and painfully public her inevitable falling-out will be.
posted by rokusan at 3:59 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by rokusan at 3:59 PM on August 10, 2009 [2 favorites]
Cool. It's a crappy job market these days, so it's nice to hear that someone was able to land a job they're excited about, thanks for the update!
Wait, are we congratulating her? No one informed me about this.
posted by dhammond at 4:21 PM on August 10, 2009
Wait, are we congratulating her? No one informed me about this.
posted by dhammond at 4:21 PM on August 10, 2009
Remember Susan? Looks like she's employed.
Are we taking bets on when she gets laid off when there's no return on investing in her?
Also, as a product evangelist, does this mean she doesn't make as much money as the sales people actually selling the product do?
posted by anniecat at 4:49 PM on August 10, 2009
Are we taking bets on when she gets laid off when there's no return on investing in her?
Also, as a product evangelist, does this mean she doesn't make as much money as the sales people actually selling the product do?
posted by anniecat at 4:49 PM on August 10, 2009
[music]
Who's the black private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks?
SCORM!
Damn right. Who is the man who would risk his life for his brother man?
SCORM!
Right on. Who's the cat who won't cop out, when there's danger all about?
SCORM!
They say this cat SCORM is one baad, mother-...
Shut your mouth!
...but I'm talkin' about SCORM!
posted by Fiasco da Gama at 4:53 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
Who's the black private dick that's a sex machine to all the chicks?
SCORM!
Damn right. Who is the man who would risk his life for his brother man?
SCORM!
Right on. Who's the cat who won't cop out, when there's danger all about?
SCORM!
They say this cat SCORM is one baad, mother-...
Shut your mouth!
...but I'm talkin' about SCORM!
posted by Fiasco da Gama at 4:53 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
When you catch,
do not seem to get the risk of all cats?
Shaft!
Right!
posted by cortex (staff) at 4:57 PM on August 10, 2009
do not seem to get the risk of all cats?
Shaft!
Right!
posted by cortex (staff) at 4:57 PM on August 10, 2009
I spent ALL of last week trying to get a learning presentation I created to play well with the largely undocumented, hideously over-complex, buggy SCORM CMS a client uses. Jesus, just fucking kill me now if another SCORM project comes down the pipe.
It turns out I was up against a bug that "everyone knows about" but no one has bothered documenting or thought to fucking let me in on the party. Fucking scorm. Fuck it with something big and spiky.
In sum, FUCK SCORM.*
* In case you haven't picked up on it, I think SCORM is a fucking joke. Every once in awhile, randomly, the adlnet.gov web site goes down, usually presenting a "401 Authorization Required" user/password box...for their public-facing home page.
Fuckers. Christ, I need a drink.
posted by maxwelton at 4:58 PM on August 10, 2009 [4 favorites]
It turns out I was up against a bug that "everyone knows about" but no one has bothered documenting or thought to fucking let me in on the party. Fucking scorm. Fuck it with something big and spiky.
In sum, FUCK SCORM.*
* In case you haven't picked up on it, I think SCORM is a fucking joke. Every once in awhile, randomly, the adlnet.gov web site goes down, usually presenting a "401 Authorization Required" user/password box...for their public-facing home page.
Fuckers. Christ, I need a drink.
posted by maxwelton at 4:58 PM on August 10, 2009 [4 favorites]
Somebody remind me -- how is a product evangelist different from a regular evangelist again?
posted by FelliniBlank at 5:06 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by FelliniBlank at 5:06 PM on August 10, 2009
No sex scandals.
posted by jonmc at 5:10 PM on August 10, 2009 [4 favorites]
posted by jonmc at 5:10 PM on August 10, 2009 [4 favorites]
"It is now technically feasible to evangelize without the aid of Seth Godin (and, for that matter, buzzwords) and to produce only marketing gobbledygook. We must begin immediately to do so."
- Pg. 1, "S.C.O.R.M. Manifesto", by Susan
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 5:15 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
- Pg. 1, "S.C.O.R.M. Manifesto", by Susan
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 5:15 PM on August 10, 2009 [3 favorites]
FelliniBlank: "Somebody remind me -- how is a product evangelist different from a regular evangelist again?"
They carry free samples of Pepsi Blue on their persons wherever they go?
(When I was a teenager, they used to wear bikinis and wander around shopping centres handing out free packets of cigarettes. Nowadays they dress slightly more demurely, hang around in clubs, and try to convince you to buy the latest brand of alcopop...)
(Best related anecdote ever: my old boss and his drunken mates once dragged me along to a pub at lunchtime to ogle the scantily-clad lingerie girls promoting some booze or other. The place was packed literally shoulder-to-shoulder; an overhead view would have looked like a perfect demonstration of Brownian motion in a liquid.
And as I'm standing there, a callow youth trying to perve discretely at the T&A wiggling by and not spill his beer, I felt a silky arm slide over my left shoulder, a soft bustier-clad breast press against my side, and a cheery voice said "Hi, Rod!"
It was a girl I'd gone to school with...)
posted by Pinback at 6:12 PM on August 10, 2009
They carry free samples of Pepsi Blue on their persons wherever they go?
(When I was a teenager, they used to wear bikinis and wander around shopping centres handing out free packets of cigarettes. Nowadays they dress slightly more demurely, hang around in clubs, and try to convince you to buy the latest brand of alcopop...)
(Best related anecdote ever: my old boss and his drunken mates once dragged me along to a pub at lunchtime to ogle the scantily-clad lingerie girls promoting some booze or other. The place was packed literally shoulder-to-shoulder; an overhead view would have looked like a perfect demonstration of Brownian motion in a liquid.
And as I'm standing there, a callow youth trying to perve discretely at the T&A wiggling by and not spill his beer, I felt a silky arm slide over my left shoulder, a soft bustier-clad breast press against my side, and a cheery voice said "Hi, Rod!"
It was a girl I'd gone to school with...)
posted by Pinback at 6:12 PM on August 10, 2009
If Susan turns out to work for anti-SCORM agents, I will honestly be impressed with her marketing skills.
posted by DU at 7:07 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by DU at 7:07 PM on August 10, 2009
"become SCORM conformant."
Do I have to? I don't even know what it means, but I think I don't want to. No seriously, this is acronym gone bad. The semiotics are all whack. It's all obstruent-y and then nasal, blech! I mean I'm happy for Susan and all, and the Rustici* guys seem cool, especially with their shiny website, but seriously, that product is doomed. Rename, stat!
Is it [ɹəstiki] or [ɹəstiči]? This company confuses me!
posted by iamkimiam at 7:26 PM on August 10, 2009
Do I have to? I don't even know what it means, but I think I don't want to. No seriously, this is acronym gone bad. The semiotics are all whack. It's all obstruent-y and then nasal, blech! I mean I'm happy for Susan and all, and the Rustici* guys seem cool, especially with their shiny website, but seriously, that product is doomed. Rename, stat!
Is it [ɹəstiki] or [ɹəstiči]? This company confuses me!
posted by iamkimiam at 7:26 PM on August 10, 2009
Hope she did a background check on their LTRs and penises. You never know what kind of crazies are on the internet these days.
posted by thisperon at 9:00 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by thisperon at 9:00 PM on August 10, 2009
I just read her web site in Sarah Palin's voice.
This explains why she quit the old job, at least: No male boss
posted by qxntpqbbbqxl at 9:11 PM on August 10, 2009
This explains why she quit the old job, at least: No male boss
posted by qxntpqbbbqxl at 9:11 PM on August 10, 2009
DU: "SCORM conformant."
aka scormformant
posted by boo_radley at 9:17 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
aka scormformant
posted by boo_radley at 9:17 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
aka scormformant
whose environment can be customised by editing the file
whose environment can be customised by editing the file
cormorants.confposted by Fiasco da Gama at 9:45 PM on August 10, 2009 [1 favorite]
When not in use, SCORM should be returned to its special container and kept under refrigeration. Failure to do so relieves the makers of SCORM, Wacky Products Incorporated, and its parent company, Global Chemical Unlimited, of any and all liability.
posted by not_on_display at 9:50 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by not_on_display at 9:50 PM on August 10, 2009
"Mike and I both read Susan’s site cover to cover and immediately knew that she got the single most important thing to us… tone."
posted by tellurian at 10:24 PM on August 10, 2009
posted by tellurian at 10:24 PM on August 10, 2009
SCORM, the ideology behind scormfront.org
posted by Free word order! at 1:03 AM on August 11, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by Free word order! at 1:03 AM on August 11, 2009 [2 favorites]
S̤̯̖̱̭͖̊̀̽ͨ̅Ç͓͖̥͕̫̲͙͂̓͂ͧO̷̤͙R̛̙͓̪̞̙̦̮̂M̛͉̞͙̺͕͍̆ͤͥ
posted by jannw at 1:21 AM on August 11, 2009 [6 favorites]
posted by jannw at 1:21 AM on August 11, 2009 [6 favorites]
She does not have the attention span to stay in this new job very long.
I give her three to six months.
Being an evangelist for technical standards, while it may sound sexy when you place the emphasis on the word "evangelist," will be about as exciting as being an evangelist for stain-resistant fabric treatments. The boredom of the day to day grind will be crushing.
Keep looking, Susan.
posted by jayder at 5:04 AM on August 11, 2009
I give her three to six months.
Being an evangelist for technical standards, while it may sound sexy when you place the emphasis on the word "evangelist," will be about as exciting as being an evangelist for stain-resistant fabric treatments. The boredom of the day to day grind will be crushing.
Keep looking, Susan.
posted by jayder at 5:04 AM on August 11, 2009
Can you say SERENDIPITY? (My mother certainly can; it’s among her favorite words!)
Well, I'm no expert in serendipity either, but my mother worked in the field, and by extension, I've had a lot to do with her research.
posted by cjorgensen at 6:25 AM on August 11, 2009 [2 favorites]
Well, I'm no expert in serendipity either, but my mother worked in the field, and by extension, I've had a lot to do with her research.
posted by cjorgensen at 6:25 AM on August 11, 2009 [2 favorites]
I just read her web site in Sarah Palin's voice. This explains why she quit the old job, at least: No male boss
It's interesting that Susan insisted on "hiring" only male bosses, yet disagreed with Hillary Clinton supporters for their "preference and desires [..] caught up in having a woman president. "
posted by applemeat at 6:32 AM on August 11, 2009
It's interesting that Susan insisted on "hiring" only male bosses, yet disagreed with Hillary Clinton supporters for their "preference and desires [..] caught up in having a woman president. "
posted by applemeat at 6:32 AM on August 11, 2009
I hope they asked her to produce some actual ideas and marketing plans before they hired her on the vague (and really laughable) premise that she had a "superpower" called "getting things done." I hope her first set of meetings don't end in a bunch of Seth Godin babble and nothing concrete. Because it would be too bad if her bosses fired her (or, since she hired them, perhaps would that make her a quitter). Who knows. Websites and marketing goobledegook are easy, actual results are hard. And it sounds like the product sucks, too.
posted by jokeefe at 7:28 AM on August 11, 2009
posted by jokeefe at 7:28 AM on August 11, 2009
People who look at you blankly if you start saying things like UI and SQL and compilers and so forth. (Come back!! I know I started to lose you there.)
UGH. As a nerdy software person myself, I cannot stomach the condescension of people who say things like that. THAT's when I start to stare blankly. Or vomit.
posted by kingbenny at 7:48 AM on August 11, 2009 [3 favorites]
UGH. As a nerdy software person myself, I cannot stomach the condescension of people who say things like that. THAT's when I start to stare blankly. Or vomit.
posted by kingbenny at 7:48 AM on August 11, 2009 [3 favorites]
I hope they asked her to produce some actual ideas..
Oh, I doubt that'll present our Susan with any problemo! --After all, she's an idea hamster. (She got some valuable ones, too!)
(You know, I think we're all just tasting sour grapes because ALL PEOPLE ARE NOT CREATED EQUAL.)
posted by applemeat at 8:12 AM on August 11, 2009
Oh, I doubt that'll present our Susan with any problemo! --After all, she's an idea hamster. (She got some valuable ones, too!)
(You know, I think we're all just tasting sour grapes because ALL PEOPLE ARE NOT CREATED EQUAL.)
posted by applemeat at 8:12 AM on August 11, 2009
"So it's easy to understand why it chaps my hide (and a few other body parts) that in the name of [..] ego and self-esteem, we have become a society that actually awards mediocrity."
>Head asplodes<
posted by applemeat at 8:16 AM on August 11, 2009 [3 favorites]
>Head asplodes<
posted by applemeat at 8:16 AM on August 11, 2009 [3 favorites]
oh my, she's not just an idea hamster, but also a terrible photographer!
although it's more likely that she's trying to make herself look... younger?... smoother?... by blowing out the photo digitally.
posted by shmegegge at 8:17 AM on August 11, 2009
although it's more likely that she's trying to make herself look... younger?... smoother?... by blowing out the photo digitally.
posted by shmegegge at 8:17 AM on August 11, 2009
SusanDiesInAFire.com
posted by Damn That Television at 8:26 AM on August 11, 2009
posted by Damn That Television at 8:26 AM on August 11, 2009
"So it's easy to understand why it chaps my hide (and a few other body parts) that in the name of [..] ego and self-esteem, we have become a society that actually awards mediocrity."
*dingdingdingdingding* We have a winner!
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 8:55 AM on August 11, 2009 [1 favorite]
*dingdingdingdingding* We have a winner!
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 8:55 AM on August 11, 2009 [1 favorite]
I can say nothing but OMG lulz.
The Google ads on the page ("curing narcissism" or something) are exceptional, too.
posted by jokeefe at 9:49 AM on August 11, 2009
The Google ads on the page ("curing narcissism" or something) are exceptional, too.
posted by jokeefe at 9:49 AM on August 11, 2009
I understand the reactions, to an extent -- marketers are e-e-eeeevil, amirite?!?, and she seems like a fairly typical gladhander/BS-spouter as these things go.
But I have to say I took some value from the "hire a boss" approach; it's nice to see somebody with the confidence (warranted or not) to actually value themselves as a commodity and ask not who she should work for, but who she wants to let hire her. I thought the approach was refreshing, and as much as there's a lot in that blog and her personal politics I don't care for, it's a good dynamic that puts some refreshing value on the employee.
So a kid that loves marketing and values... enthusiasm over content, is a charitable way to put it, I guess... has found herself a job working for some folks that are gung-ho about hiring her, feeling that she'll bring a lot to a company that does something technological and contorted and needs somebody to help explain and sell it to a broad audience, which -- judging from her blog and the responses to it, she does have some sort of talent for.
Let's all hate them.
posted by Shepherd at 10:46 AM on August 11, 2009
But I have to say I took some value from the "hire a boss" approach; it's nice to see somebody with the confidence (warranted or not) to actually value themselves as a commodity and ask not who she should work for, but who she wants to let hire her. I thought the approach was refreshing, and as much as there's a lot in that blog and her personal politics I don't care for, it's a good dynamic that puts some refreshing value on the employee.
So a kid that loves marketing and values... enthusiasm over content, is a charitable way to put it, I guess... has found herself a job working for some folks that are gung-ho about hiring her, feeling that she'll bring a lot to a company that does something technological and contorted and needs somebody to help explain and sell it to a broad audience, which -- judging from her blog and the responses to it, she does have some sort of talent for.
Let's all hate them.
posted by Shepherd at 10:46 AM on August 11, 2009
marketers are e-e-eeeevil, amirite?!?
Nah...It's not the marketing, it’s her insufferable smugness. I doubt anyone would bother taking the piss had Susan went about her imaginative job search with less vapidity and arrogance. Her categorical dismissal of women didn’t help, either.
enthusiasm over content
There is no there there.
posted by applemeat at 11:17 AM on August 11, 2009
Nah...It's not the marketing, it’s her insufferable smugness. I doubt anyone would bother taking the piss had Susan went about her imaginative job search with less vapidity and arrogance. Her categorical dismissal of women didn’t help, either.
enthusiasm over content
There is no there there.
posted by applemeat at 11:17 AM on August 11, 2009
"evangelize the SCORM Cloud" ...?
No, I cannot believe that this is a real thing where real people are really saying these things. In a month we're going to find out that this is all part of the build-up to the next season of Lost.
posted by prefpara at 11:56 AM on August 11, 2009 [3 favorites]
No, I cannot believe that this is a real thing where real people are really saying these things. In a month we're going to find out that this is all part of the build-up to the next season of Lost.
posted by prefpara at 11:56 AM on August 11, 2009 [3 favorites]
So the smoke monster is SCORM?
And I get tired of web gimmick 2.0. Susan's site is no better than the weirdos that build epic altars of ego about themselves saying what they require in a mate. Yes, the honesty can be refreshing, but when you put it all out there...people are going to snark.
Her approach wasn't new. Someone does some attention whoring, gets attention. I'm not for or against this approach, but if your going to do your job search publicly, people are going to look at your resume and laugh. I find it best if only the people in HR do that when I look for employment.
posted by cjorgensen at 12:45 PM on August 11, 2009
And I get tired of web gimmick 2.0. Susan's site is no better than the weirdos that build epic altars of ego about themselves saying what they require in a mate. Yes, the honesty can be refreshing, but when you put it all out there...people are going to snark.
Her approach wasn't new. Someone does some attention whoring, gets attention. I'm not for or against this approach, but if your going to do your job search publicly, people are going to look at your resume and laugh. I find it best if only the people in HR do that when I look for employment.
posted by cjorgensen at 12:45 PM on August 11, 2009
A hollow voice says "SCORM".
posted by fleacircus at 3:12 AM on August 12, 2009
posted by fleacircus at 3:12 AM on August 12, 2009
But I have to say I took some value from the "hire a boss" approach
They're here already! You're next! You're next! YOU'RE NEXT! [Kevin McCarthy faceplants onto windshield]
posted by Sidhedevil at 10:49 AM on August 12, 2009
They're here already! You're next! You're next! YOU'RE NEXT! [Kevin McCarthy faceplants onto windshield]
posted by Sidhedevil at 10:49 AM on August 12, 2009
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posted by Mister_A at 12:06 PM on August 10, 2009