We need to talk. November 13, 2011 9:54 AM   Subscribe

This just might be the best AskMe troll I've ever seen.

It's just so perfect. You have a Ph.D making a six-figure salary who talks like a badass about "looking up miniature donkeys" who gets hit on all the time but hasn't had sex with her husband in a year because she's "too fat" despite being only 10 pounds overweight and offering a threesome with her hot friend.

If I were going to write a post that touched on all of the AskMe "hot buttons" to summon a torrent of sympathy, I'd be very hard pressed to do better than this. She even somehow crammed exercise and race in there. The addition of little extraneous details, like the escort's name, are almost hilariously salacious.

I see that the comment has been anonymized, and that the poster's comments have been removed. Was there anything there that made this more believable?

If the poster really is what she says she is, I apologize. But seriously.
posted by I EAT TAPAS to MetaFilter-Related at 9:54 AM (41 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite

Man, there've been a lot of mean-spirited threads on the grey recently.
posted by Narrative Priorities at 9:57 AM on November 13, 2011 [49 favorites]


There's no reason to disbelieve the poster as near as I can tell. It's written perhaps a little floridly but seems to be a pretty genuine situation.
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 9:58 AM on November 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Can we stop the back seat moderating please? It's getting really old, really fast.
posted by royalsong at 10:00 AM on November 13, 2011 [65 favorites]


I think it's preferred that you take your suspicions to the contact form before publicly mocking someone asking for help.
posted by villanelles at dawn at 10:00 AM on November 13, 2011 [65 favorites]


I wasn't skeptical until I read the part about the escort having a declawed cat.
posted by found missing at 10:01 AM on November 13, 2011 [37 favorites]


This is one of those situations where "so what if you're duped?" applies. Let it go. I really don't see what there is to discuss as a community here.
posted by spiderskull at 10:03 AM on November 13, 2011 [10 favorites]


I think it's preferred that you take your suspicions to the contact form before publicly mocking someone asking for help.

Preferred yes, but never listened to.

But if you do, your answers get answered really fast. Imagine that?
posted by lampshade at 10:05 AM on November 13, 2011


This is one of those situations where "so what if you're duped?" applies. Let it go. I really don't see what there is to discuss as a community here.

Attention-gathering but non-malicious trolling, if left unchecked, can negatively impact the legitimacy and readership of a community (cf Reddit IAMA posts).
posted by I EAT TAPAS at 10:08 AM on November 13, 2011 [8 favorites]


Man, the gray is rooting out deep-level trolls/spammers all over the place. Or it's being used as a back avenue to mock other users who may not even know the existence of the gray. One of the two, for sure.
posted by Think_Long at 10:09 AM on November 13, 2011 [4 favorites]


I saw a comment by the OP before it was deleted. It was by a person who's been a member for several years. Not overly active, but there's nothing to make me think this person would suddleny write an elaborate troll. There was even a pre-wedding question that fit the general timeline. I feel like an awful snoop for even looking, but there you go.
posted by Devils Rancher at 10:10 AM on November 13, 2011 [10 favorites]


There's no reason to disbelieve the poster as near as I can tell.

Really? Really??
posted by DU at 10:11 AM on November 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


That's quite helpful, Devils Rancher. My apologies. Mods, please close.
posted by I EAT TAPAS at 10:12 AM on November 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Attention-gathering but non-malicious trolling, if left unchecked, can negatively impact the legitimacy and readership of a community (cf Reddit IAMA posts).

So can baseless attacks on community members.
posted by Rodrigo Lamaitre at 10:12 AM on November 13, 2011 [31 favorites]


i wonder if anyone's ever trollishly managed to call herself out in the grey on a thread she trollishly started on the green? i would be very impressed.
posted by facetious at 10:14 AM on November 13, 2011


Really? Really??

Really. Really. The burden of proof for publicly declaring some other user to be peddling bullshit needs to be a lot more substantial than "their life experience differs from mine".

Attention-gathering but non-malicious trolling, if left unchecked, can negatively impact the legitimacy and readership of a community (cf Reddit IAMA posts).

And if you have some specific evidence that someone is in fact trolling, send us a note about it at the contact form and we can look into it. Engaging in public speculation about trolling is itself really not a great thing for the community and not something we want people to get into the habit of.

Reddit is a very different place from Metafilter, with very different scale and moderation issues than we have here, and while the weird mix of bullshitting and paranoia on IAMA may be a useful cautionary tale it is not remotely the standard by which we intend to either measure things on Ask Metafilter or set moderation or community policy and practices here.
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:20 AM on November 13, 2011 [37 favorites]


CORTEX HAS SPOKEN
posted by nathancaswell at 10:21 AM on November 13, 2011 [4 favorites]


Sometimes when you're in the middle of an obviously fucked up situation, it's really difficult to see how fucked up it is because the usual makers are way the hell over there.
posted by mandymanwasregistered at 10:21 AM on November 13, 2011 [3 favorites]


So this should be closed any time now? Not much good in keeping it open.
posted by gerryblog at 10:35 AM on November 13, 2011


also, when someone has a problem they often try to frame it in the context of all the things that they think make them awesome, their income, their education, their awesomeness so that they can have a problem and get attention for it, without being one of those "problem people".

it can come across as pretty over the top, but it's no big deal and doesn't lessen the problem.
posted by Stonestock Relentless at 10:40 AM on November 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


CORTEX HAS SPOKEN

Actually, he's written.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 10:44 AM on November 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Actually, he's typed.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 10:47 AM on November 13, 2011 [4 favorites]


Attention-gathering but non-malicious trolling, if left unchecked, can negatively impact the legitimacy and readership of a community (cf Reddit IAMA posts).

This is full of bad assumptions, some of which became clear to you when someone else was able to vouch for the member before the question was anonymized. Maybe the contact form would be better for this kind of concern before leaping to conclusions.
posted by rtha at 10:49 AM on November 13, 2011


Do you have proof this is a troll? No? Then kindly consider the possibility that you are as bang out of order as that person who recently insisted that Mefi was being "gamed" on the basis of, uh, no actual evidence whatsoever.
posted by Decani at 10:49 AM on November 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


My vote goes towards leaving this thread open. There are quite a few members that deserve to be called out but have not yet been. Let's just use this as an open forum to do so. I'll go first:

what the fuck is wrong with that item guy, anyways? he's been spry-painting shit all over the loading dock behind the Sam's Club in Plano for, like, months now and yet no Mefites have done jack squat in the form of MeTa callouts to pressure him to stop. I mean, *really*?
posted by item at 10:50 AM on November 13, 2011


But what if he was using speech to text software?! Maybe he did speak and write and type, ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 10:50 AM on November 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


in before post closed
posted by Shit Parade at 10:50 AM on November 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


This time of year, I put some pumpkin in my pancakes. They are very tasty.
posted by kinetic at 10:52 AM on November 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


Especially if he wrote down what he said on a spare piece of paper first, Brandon Blatcher.
posted by royalsong at 10:52 AM on November 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


spry painting is the new form of spray painting that all the old folks are afraid their grandkids friends are doing.

punctuation be damned!
posted by item at 10:52 AM on November 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


what the fuck is wrong with that item guy, anyways? he's been spr[a]y-painting shit all over the loading dock behind the Sam's Club in Plano for, like, months now

The real problem with him was the time he annexed Austria and then rolled tanks into Poland. Yeah it made a great sidebar but really ... what a dick.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 10:57 AM on November 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


Fantasia, heh.
posted by spitbull at 11:00 AM on November 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


I sleep with weasels in my shorts.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:00 AM on November 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


Note to my Secret Quonsar: Please send me a miniature donkey so I can "talk like a badass" about it. Thanks in advance.
posted by argonauta at 11:06 AM on November 13, 2011 [14 favorites]


Modding has broken, like the first modding
Cortex has spoken, like the first core...
posted by TedW at 11:18 AM on November 13, 2011 [11 favorites]


what the fuck is wrong with that item guy, anyways?

Don't ever trust any MeFite with four letters in their user name. Swaggering, overbearing, tin-plated dictator with delusions of godhood, every damned one of 'em.


But hey, they're not soft.
posted by zarq at 11:21 AM on November 13, 2011 [7 favorites]


Just "sack up" and answer the (probably fake but who knows) question!
posted by hermitosis at 11:29 AM on November 13, 2011


Zarq speaks the truth, unpleasant though it may be
posted by TedW at 11:30 AM on November 13, 2011 [1 favorite]


Maybe he did speak and write and type, ALL AT THE SAME TIME!

He used his dictatorial mod powars.
posted by Devils Rancher at 11:37 AM on November 13, 2011 [3 favorites]


am am not stupid. I have a Ph.D

Hee Hee Hee
posted by jonmc at 11:37 AM on November 13, 2011 [6 favorites]


posted by argonauta

Molluscfilter!

I wonder just how many mefites have mollusc-names. Seems like a high-ish volume. Of course a bunch of the squid contingent completed the sign up process but either never commented, or are barely active.
posted by zarq at 11:39 AM on November 13, 2011 [3 favorites]


Looks like we're done here. I'm going to close this up.
posted by restless_nomad (staff) at 11:40 AM on November 13, 2011 [2 favorites]


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