Finishing touches on....

July 24, 2002 9:19 PM

We see so many Apple-related announcements posted to MeFi. Segway was, of course, huge...even getting its own mention on the MeFi Sidebar. And now Matt has said this:

Now that those bugs are fixed, I'm putting the finishing touches on a new feature for MetaFilter I think everyone will enjoy.

Anyone care to speculate?
posted by BlueTrain to MetaFilter-Related at 9:19 PM (53 comments total)

A magical, pansexual, non-threatening spokesthing?
posted by MegoSteve at 9:30 PM on July 24, 2002

thread-tracking
posted by machaus at 9:32 PM on July 24, 2002

My.MetaFilter.com, previously known as P.O.N.Y. 1.0
posted by riffola at 9:33 PM on July 24, 2002

* starts putting up hay *
posted by yhbc at 9:34 PM on July 24, 2002

They will build cities around it...
posted by lotsofno at 9:48 PM on July 24, 2002

I care not to speculate.
posted by y2karl at 9:48 PM on July 24, 2002

iMatt is the latest invention from Haughey Enterprises. iMatt can be used in a variety of situations on metafilter. by connecting to the iMatt server, you can tell iMatt to issue soothing responses to noisy threads in an attempt to calm things down.

I/P threads bogging you down? the iMatt says:

Well, I can only give my opinion but I think you guys are both wrong because you're both too self-righteous. You guys probably need to chill out.

too many bugs being posted to Metatalk? the iMatt says:

The bug is fixed. Thanks.

with loadable iMattModules, the range of situations that the iMatt is useful for is endless! sign up for iMatt today!
posted by moz at 9:54 PM on July 24, 2002

A BlueTrain extra-crispy, inquisition-quality portable toasty roaster and burner, with an alarm feature for imminent posts? ;)
posted by MiguelCardoso at 10:02 PM on July 24, 2002

I think it would be great if there was some way to comment on links that get posted. I can't tell you how long I've been waiting for something like that.
posted by willnot at 10:16 PM on July 24, 2002

I think it's a tuna fish sandwich.

And I that it's a bit of an exaggeration to call it a "feature," Matt.

Also, technically you will be the only one to enjoy it.

posted by Shadowkeeper at 10:16 PM on July 24, 2002

"I'm going to become rich and famous after I invent a device that allows you to stab people in the face over the Internet."

— Found in the apparently now-defunct IRC Quote Database.
posted by Danelope at 10:17 PM on July 24, 2002

A strong and corrective shock will be applied to all who post to I/P threads.
posted by owillis at 10:22 PM on July 24, 2002

You guys are all so far off it's pathetic.

Matt has quite obviously invented pancake teleportation. Press "1" for buttermilk, "2" for blueberry, then open your CD-ROM drive and enjoy!

Those of you on Macs can also choose Apple-cinnamon.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 10:32 PM on July 24, 2002

then open your CD-ROM drive and enjoy

You mean my cupholder?
posted by kirkaracha at 10:55 PM on July 24, 2002

Here's some hints (these are all serious, and I'll explain when I'm ready to launch, which should be tomorrow or friday).

- it capitalizes on a certain kind of thread that comes up on metafilter from time to time.

- it lets members of the community share their interests with others.

- it's also going to help online free speech

- it uses the latest xml and soap technology

hmm. it sounds more impressive than it actually is, but it'll still be good.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 11:00 PM on July 24, 2002

Live streaming nude girls.

Matt, you rock.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:03 PM on July 24, 2002

Live streaming nude girls.

Better. "What's your favorite live streaming nude girl site? Mine's marciabradyimposters.com. Let's discuss this further on MetaLists!"
posted by gleuschk at 11:11 PM on July 24, 2002

Or was it Marsha?
posted by gleuschk at 11:13 PM on July 24, 2002

Kirkaracha: I remember a neat e-mail forwardista about a year ago saying "click here to win your own personal cup-holder" which then magically opened your CD drawer. I have it somewhere but can't find it for all the spam. Does anyone else know of it?
posted by MiguelCardoso at 11:14 PM on July 24, 2002

A massive database of cross-correlated "which X are you" test results that reverse maps results to specific answers, and uses that data to provide one-click filling out of future "which X are you" tests. Brilliant!
posted by Nothing at 11:18 PM on July 24, 2002

Miguel, I suspect this is the file of which you speak.

Of course, being an .EXE file, it shall never sully the Ethernet port of my computer, for I am cautious. Or is it paranoid? I can never remember.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:30 PM on July 24, 2002

- it capitalizes on a certain kind of thread that comes up on metafilter from time to time.

Doubleposts

- it lets members of the community share their interests with others.

ie. The first poster

- it's also going to help online free speech

ie. all those wankers on metatalk who cry "doublepost!"

- it uses the latest xml and soap technology

doublepost feeds?
posted by Neale at 11:43 PM on July 24, 2002

But Main Street's still all cracked and broken...
posted by willnot at 11:58 PM on July 24, 2002

Biorhythms?
posted by eyeballkid at 12:24 AM on July 25, 2002

A Metafilter alcoholic drinks database, XMLifying all of Miguel's posts on same?
posted by dhartung at 2:06 AM on July 25, 2002

Coming soon: .Matt -- now Metafilter can be yours for the low price of $99/year.
posted by mcwetboy at 2:47 AM on July 25, 2002

Tom Servo: I think it's a strapless evening gown.

Crow: You think everything is a strapless evening gown!

Tom Servo: I just think they're neat, is all...
posted by toddshot at 2:59 AM on July 25, 2002

XMLifying all of Miguel's posts on same?

or SOAPing all of Miguel's posts on same?

Right, now to get that image out of my head...


posted by i_cola at 3:36 AM on July 25, 2002

Nah. Must be about music - sharing personal faves. Little confused on the Free Speech issue, though. Hmm...
posted by Marquis at 6:31 AM on July 25, 2002

Live streaming nude girls.

Great, but what about MY needs?

I'd pony up (so to speak) for a Men of MetaFilter wall calendar. Uh, provided the Men were well-selected. Actually, tell you what, I volunteer to serve on the editorial board. Quality control. Yes!
posted by Sapphireblue at 7:12 AM on July 25, 2002

oooo! men of metafilter! can i be mr. september?
posted by quonsar at 7:16 AM on July 25, 2002

*faints*
posted by Sapphireblue at 7:21 AM on July 25, 2002

Why GOD WHY did I ever click quonsar's link?
posted by insomnyuk at 7:46 AM on July 25, 2002

I never click strange links that go directly to an image, especially at work

Guess it's a good policy, uh, sapphire and insomnyuk?
posted by matteo at 7:50 AM on July 25, 2002

hot!
posted by adampsyche at 7:51 AM on July 25, 2002

I know that quonsar is puckish and all, I just couldn't help myself. Damn you quonsar.
posted by insomnyuk at 8:10 AM on July 25, 2002

whoa!
posted by tj at 8:11 AM on July 25, 2002

Santa??
posted by evanizer at 8:31 AM on July 25, 2002

Yep: expected to be terrified, but couldn't help myself.

The IT staffer whose monitor faces back into a corner has no fear (of anything other than the scary dreams she'll have tonight, starring Mr. September).
posted by Sapphireblue at 8:33 AM on July 25, 2002

*cries*
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 8:36 AM on July 25, 2002

it sounds more impressive than it actually is

Have you ever considered a career in marketing?
posted by timeistight at 8:40 AM on July 25, 2002

I'm just hoping it's NOT a way for members to swap nude pics of themselves while surfing MetaFilter.
posted by insomnyuk at 9:09 AM on July 25, 2002

Cool...an auto-spammer for I/P propaganda! Submit your email addresses now.
posted by rushmc at 9:32 AM on July 25, 2002

sapphireblue--great idea! men of metafilter calendar! i'd buy that!! as long as they are "well-selected" like you said above. count me in on the editorial board please! and yes, i clicked on the quonsar link. not that shocking, since i automatically think that any guy who hits on me online looks pretty much like that.
posted by rio at 11:28 AM on July 25, 2002

If there's a men of Mefi calendar, I have to be on the cover. Oh, wait, you want people to want to buy it.
posted by owillis at 11:46 AM on July 25, 2002

I know what it is! It's CrapBack™. For any I/P thread, people can have the new custom agent software send in their pre-decided opinion on the subject ("Jews are Nazis!" "Fat people should be forced to wear burkas!") automatically posted to the thread.

Remotely! Via XML-RPC! Using Google!

I want to be in the calendar.
posted by anildash at 12:06 PM on July 25, 2002

How about The Dogs of MetaFilter?
posted by timeistight at 12:12 PM on July 25, 2002

I think it's going to be a file sharing application for unsigned bands who don't mind being on the internet and available for download. But that might be because I read Mr. Haughey's blog. (Free speach = Free Songs).

I nominate myself as chair of the editorial board.
posted by goneill at 12:13 PM on July 25, 2002

Owillis: love your show, babe, but of course Mr. Haughey is the a logical selection for the cover photo, since he's the boss and he's got those dreamy eyeglasses. Uh, we don't have anyone for Mr. September yet though *grin*

Goneill can chair, as long as everyone talks a whole lot, in admiring tones, about how cool I am for having had the idea. Because I don't have many, see.

Also, as long as we can use "boyzone THIS" as the calendar's tagline. hee.

...I'm sorry, were we speculating about the new feature?
posted by Sapphireblue at 1:04 PM on July 25, 2002

I call Mr. December, as it is my birth month, and I was born in Canada, so the winter theme ties in nicely.
posted by insomnyuk at 1:22 PM on July 25, 2002

i 100% support the creation of this calendar. and i have Printing Connections. someone email me if this ever seriously takes off, because i'm all over it.
posted by pikachulolita at 2:53 PM on July 25, 2002

I always thought this place was a bit of a girlzone ;-)
posted by dg at 8:47 PM on July 25, 2002

I was just kidding about chairing. It's totally all you saphire blue.
posted by goneill at 6:17 AM on July 26, 2002