Metatalktail Hour: Open Thread! April 13, 2019 5:34 PM   Subscribe

Good Saturday evening, MetaFilter! This week: Open thread!

Tell us everything that's up with you! And if you have ideas for future MetaTalkTails, hit me up! (via contact form, memail, or e-mail)
posted by Eyebrows McGee (staff) to MetaFilter-Related at 5:34 PM (147 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite


Helped my buddy find his lost wallet and phone, proceeded to get him stoned.
posted by clavdivs at 5:40 PM on April 13, 2019 [5 favorites]

This has been something of a hell week. Dad's been stiffer and stiffer starting last Friday, and then on Monday he could barely move and it turned into a capital E emergency and an ambulance was summoned. To add to the horror the ekg they gave him in our living room seem to indicate he was having a heart attack, something he'd never had to this point. Mom's recent problems means her immuno-compromised status is worse than ever, so I had to ride along in the wee woo mobile (and they did use the sirens which was fucking horrible) and stay with my dad into the wee hours in the ER until he was admitted to the hospital. Good thing I know how to get to UCSF via bus. Good news: it was a relapse of his PMR coupled with light pericarditis, and the ekg was wrong no heart attack. He came home Thursday and everything has gotten a bit more normal since. He's moving good, he's back on his meds which he should never have gone down on in the first place, and everything's going to be alright. I do feel like I've survived a mortar attack however.

I've started really getting stuck in in the garden, but for obvious reasons there hasn't been many posts this week. I did a lot of work yesterday and today however so I might get another two posts up today. The bugs have returned- had to scrape off green aphids from my baby lipstick peppers and the spittle-bugs have returned to the rosemary. I have also sown a poppy pot. I have re-committed to beating morrowind and all it's dlc largely as a sanity saving measure. Level 18 baby, got to find the cave of the incarnate! I need to sleep for maybe a year. Next week I'm going to resume posting in the non-fiction club so keep an eye on fanfare. I hope everyone is well and no one has to ride in the wee woo mobile.
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 5:50 PM on April 13, 2019 [17 favorites]

We went to a nice local Earth Day celebration today, with pony rides for the kids, and electric vehicles to see, and a recycling truck to climb into, and lots of crafts for the kids (making bee houses) and a surprising number of local green businesses/charities/initiatives. We got some useful information on local bike donation, saw some folks we know from the local climate lobby, and got the schedule for the town farmers' market. The locally-owned grocery store had their old-time popcorn machine there with free popcorn; the farmers' market had free produce; and a couple of organic brands were there handing stuff out too.

The village was also handing out free treelings and flowers, but since we don't own we didn't get any this year.

I played chicken with my taxes until the last possible minute but it only took me a couple of hours when I finally buckled down and did it today!

Grandma McGee (my mom) is coming to town for three entire weeks in May, so I'm pretty pumped about that. (They split their time between NC and IL, but since my dad hasn't retired yet, it's heavily weighted to NC right now, where he works.)

Nano McGee, who is 2 1/2, saw me looking at the new black hole picture and said, "Bwack howes? I WUV bwack howes!" How does she even know that's a black hole???? But she does.
posted by Eyebrows McGee (staff) at 5:53 PM on April 13, 2019 [15 favorites]

Tomorrow, I am taking a last minute trip across the country to take my daughter to one of the colleges she was accepted at (that she didn't visit when she did college visits in the fall.) Total trip time: less than 60 hours. I've stocked up on snacks and magazines for the plane ride. I'm guessing I'll power through the jet lag for our one day there but I suspect it'll be rough. (and rain is forecast!)
posted by vespabelle at 5:58 PM on April 13, 2019 [4 favorites]

On Tuesday I spent 12 hours in the ER with my daughter before she was admitted to the psych ward, then transferred mid-week to our local mental health hospital for severe depression and anxiety. Visited twice a day since then, while trying to keep on top of work and dealing with poorly timed renos being done to our house. Stress stress stress. And so many questions. Working on an AskMefi but too tired to do it coherently now, will hopefully do it tomorrow.
posted by valleys at 5:59 PM on April 13, 2019 [31 favorites]

Well, about half an hour ago we lost power and heard a pop. Answer: a transformer blew up about a block away, and lit its pole afire. Cambridge FD was on the scene in moments (not too surprising; nearest fire station is, I think, the one on the other side of Harvard Square). We'll probably have power again right when we go to bed.

I'm glad that we keep a lot of high-power flashlights around. And that our cable modem and router sit on a UPS (mostly for the media/backup server, which I powered down because that eats more power than the modem and router).
posted by Making You Bored For Science at 6:05 PM on April 13, 2019 [3 favorites]

It's been a crazy few months for my family for REASONS that I don't want to get into here and it's going to continue but fortunately everyone is healthy. Basically, we are adjusting to a new reality at home. It's all good, or it will be good at some point in the future. Yes, I'm being vague. Sorry.

My kid left for a church youth group service project in New Mexico this morning, so my wife and I have a week off from being parents, which we desperately need. I think she's going to go away herself so I'll have a couple of days on my own, which always sounds like it's gonna be fun but then it's just kind of lonely.

I'm almost done with the bass guitar I've been building since December. It'll be my seventh build and my first commission. I've never built anything for money before, I've never had any kind of side hustle, so it's been a weird sort of pressure that I'm not used to. If I was building it for myself I'd be happy with mediocrity but since someone is paying me a lot (sort of) of money for it I feel like it needs to be, well, not perfect, but pretty dang good. I'm pretty happy with how it's looking but the frustrating thing about these things is that I won't know if it's any good until I assemble it and string it up. I think it'll be ok.

I did my train trip a couple weeks ago. I probably mentioned it already, I don't remember. We took the Coast Starlight from LA to Portland and then the Cascades train to Seattle. We met up with friends and family in each city and even had a small MeFi meetup in Portland, which was nice. The train was not fancy or fast but it was fun.

It's Red Sox season, and they are totally sucking so far, but it's ok because it's Red Sox season.

For the second year in a row it's gonna be cold and wet for the Boston Marathon, which runs through my town, but I'll probably skip watching it this year because of that thing I said about it being cold and wet.

Today was lovely. My wife and I worked outside, moving a ton of mulch into the garden. We grilled for dinner and ate dinner with the porch door open. More of this, please.
posted by bondcliff at 6:17 PM on April 13, 2019 [15 favorites]

Who runs Metatalktown?
Eyebrows McGee runs Metatalktown!

Two topics enter one thread leaves!
posted by Nanukthedog at 6:24 PM on April 13, 2019 [3 favorites]

The sign I wait for in spring arrived today: the sentinel barn swallow, flying ahead of the flock to scout out their summer quarters. He hung out in the barn for a while, and I told him to tell the others to hurry home.
posted by MonkeyToes at 6:27 PM on April 13, 2019 [8 favorites]

My parents went to the Galapagos in March and brought back some heinous Darwinian plague that has been felling family members one after another ever since. As each person gets better, another goes down. My mom was patient zero (she wound up in the ER), then my son got it and missed 4 days of school, now my husband has it, which has created a problem since he was supposed to take our son on spring break vacation tomorrow. We've rescheduled their hotel so now they're leaving Tuesday instead and I really hope that a) he's better by that point and b) this stops with him and I escape it.
posted by soren_lorensen at 6:27 PM on April 13, 2019 [3 favorites]

I've been away for a couple weeks - a work thing in Toronto - and came back to a Montreal with sunshine, +17C and most of the snow gone. Work thing went well and sweet zombie Jesus have I ever needed this tangible glimpse of spring not-winter.
posted by mce at 6:27 PM on April 13, 2019 [5 favorites]

oh gosh. So sorry about your daughter, valleys. I hope she has a great care team (and that you do too).

Homo neanderthalensis, I'm glad the news with your dad was as good as it could be. Riding in an ambulance sounds really scary. I never thought much about it before -- never yet had the misfortune to need one, knock wood.

Last week was the local film festival, which always throws things into happy disarray in the eirias household. The most memorable movie was probably the one about industrial musicals. (If you've never had the pleasure, may I introduce you to My Bathroom.) This weekend has been a pleasant return to normal routine: shepherding Little eirias through aikido and piano and homework. Ah, and I went to Costco today and bought some AskMe-approved (TM) allergen-free snacks -- we'll be very excited to try them. Life feels manageable today.

My nearest and dearest extended family have been dealing with a health crisis for a few months, and since elementary school and immunosuppression don't mix well, we've been staying away for a bit. But we just got word this week that the clinical picture is looking good enough for us all to visit on Easter. That feels really great. So I also went to Target today and bought some portable Easter goodies. We're turning out to be more of a "basket full of fun stuff with incidental chocolate" family than a "basket full of dental caries" family.
posted by eirias at 6:30 PM on April 13, 2019 [5 favorites]

I got to see Hadestown on Broadway and it was SO GOOD. I'm going to try to get back and see it again before the cast changes. And Be More Chill, which was very fun, and managed to get in to see the taping of Last Week Tonight on the standby line. Really a killer weekend.
posted by still_wears_a_hat at 6:45 PM on April 13, 2019 [3 favorites]

I went to see the Big Apple Circus today, and it was 275 kinds of awesome. People are so skilled.
posted by JanetLand at 6:48 PM on April 13, 2019 [3 favorites]

Five weeks and change until The Big Surgery. Up until this week, I was so ready, and I've been organizing my house for the recovery and getting stuff done and feeling so positive. And then I got this pre-op packet in the mail.

Although I really like my surgeon-to-be, everything with this particular surgeon's office has been kind of a disaster. They didn't contact me for five weeks after my initial referral (apparently they'd called my transplant center, who nixed the surgery, which was weird because someone else on my transplant team had suggested I look into surgery in the first place). They scheduled me for surgery at my least favorite hospital in town. They scheduled a pre-op appt a full two months before the surgery when it's supposed to be 30 days. There's some sort of form I have to sign and they said I could just sign it and they'd put the date in later (I declined). I was told I'd get a real pre-op appt to meet the other surgeon doing the work, but instead I just got prep sheets in the mail.

But the worst part is, there's a whole GI prep thing, but the prep they're suggesting is contra-indicated for late stage kidney patients because the sort of holy-magnesium bombshell they're prescribing can literally send me into cardiac arrest because magnesium in that dosage is extremely toxic. Why didn't they check to be sure that prescription would be safe for me? AND! AND! This is totally silly, I know, but the whole instruction sheet is riddled with typos and contradictory instructions anyway, which really should be no big deal, but makes me worry that the doctor has probably never even seen these instructions, because what kind of doctor would approve a mess of a document like that?

So I've gone from Eff-Yeah-Let's-Do-This to Hmmm-Is-The-Universe-Trying-To-Tell-Me-Something? Meanwhile, I'm increasingly realizing that it's better to do this surgery ASAP because I'm hurting every hour now, even though my brain is screaming for me to look at other options, other hospitals, other doctors, even though it might be six months before I can get this rescheduled again.

I consulted BFF, who wisely suggests that maybe these cold feet are less about the packet and systemic disorganization and more about the dawning realization that this surgery really is A Big Deal and is really happening, and soon. BFF is wise and that's probably a good bit of what's happening. But I think back on the lengthy parade of cold feet of my past and how most of those times I should have paid more attention and reassessed.

I'm meeting with my primary specialist (nephrologist) (not the surgeon) this week for more advice, but right now, it's a confusing weekend, my feet are Yukon cold, and I can't find any socks.
posted by mochapickle at 6:49 PM on April 13, 2019 [31 favorites]

This week, our kid's school had its science fair. Our kiddo worked pretty hard on that old chestnut where you use cabbage juice to test the pH of household chemicals. He did a nice job and we were proud. But the thing that really made us burst our buttons was how many parents came up to us and said how much they'd heard about our kid, about how their kid was weird/odd/different but our kid was their good friend and the one kid who really appreciated their kid. He's a good person, well past the level where we can claim any credit. It's just who he is.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 6:56 PM on April 13, 2019 [32 favorites]

I have a lovely man sending me hilarious texts, and I have these Braised Country-Style Pork Ribs with Chipotle in the oven. I've never had country-style ribs before. They're not even actually ribs! They came as part of my 1/4 heritage hog, which so far has been so amazing that I'm thinking I'm gonna go half hog this fall. Ha.
posted by HotToddy at 7:06 PM on April 13, 2019 [6 favorites]

Also, lots of Metalove to you, mochapickle. I am very familiar with the feelings you describe and wish I could give you all the answers. All I can give you is my very best wishes.
posted by HotToddy at 7:10 PM on April 13, 2019 [7 favorites]

Best wishes mochapickle and big virtual hugs (huge, cuddly and heartfelt if that's your hug ).
posted by Thella at 7:37 PM on April 13, 2019 [5 favorites]

Sirens and riding in an ambulance? About 8 years ago, I was being scheduled for a heart procedure in a hospital different from the one I was currently in. Long story, but I had driven to the doctor's office the day before not expecting to be sent to the ER. They wanted me to go the 11 miles from one hospital to the other in an ambulance. I was insisting I drive home and get a ride from there. For whatever reason, (sanity?) I agreed to the ambulance.

I am placed on the gurney and slid into the back of the wagon. I am wide awake but for safety reasons, seatbelt type safety, I am strapped down to the gurney. I am watching out the back window but can only see from about 10 feet high and above because of the angle of lying back. I realize after we pass a stop light that these guys are lost. I offered my help in giving them directions to get to the parkway. At first they declined. Then when they miss another turn I offered them a deal. If I can get them to the parkway, they need to turn the siren on once we get on said parkway. They were reluctant but agreed. I had the funnest ride. I was a kid again with the we-wah, we-wah of the siren blasting away. They turned it off after a few miles, but for a brief moment, I was having fun.

Then, I am in the operating room having my arteries looked at and eventually some stents put in. I am awake, but woozy. I am able to follow the procedure on the monitor which they were willing to turn slightly towards me so I could better see. The surgeon said if I had any questions to ask. She regretted that. I started asking a million questions. It was so fascinating that this was my insides and that dye was showing my artery and heart. I kept asking to the point that she stopped and said to "Shut up" for just 10 minutes so she could concentrate. I see it as a small badge of honor to be told to shut up by the surgeon as she worked on me.

As for this week, this Wahoo is still celebrating UVa's National Championship. Not really sure how to celebrate a national championship as we never won before even when Ralph was there, but if drinking a beer nightly is celebrating, I am celebrating. How 'bout them Hoos?!
posted by AugustWest at 7:42 PM on April 13, 2019 [18 favorites]

It's been an unusually long winter for SoCal this year, and work has been really challenging, and one of my dogs declined for a couple of months and passed two weeks ago, but I finally successfully took a half-day yesterday and spent that and today sumping out my garden and getting it prepped for a late start.

I'd decided that this year I was going to learn to build things, and I began with a sort of vertical gardening structure to sit above my primary bank of 8 patio containers. I made it up in my head and not very much on paper, fucked up a bunch, and ended up with something that looks like an extremely amateur 6'hx8'lx14"w model of the Golden Gate Bridge rendered from memory by someone who is slightly colorblind. But whatever, it's already doing a great job of standing upright and being draped with solar string lights (and holding their charging panels pointing in the correct direction) and supporting a hummingbird feeder, and I'll be able to grow stuff all over it and stake stuff to it. And it's only Saturday night!

I also made carnitas in the Instant Pot last night, in a hurry and kind of flinging things in there, and it is of course THE most delicious batch I have ever made. I didn't do anything drastically different except I used a packet of Goya Culantro Y Achiote (actually thought it was Culantro Y Tomate until it was too late), sauteed the onion in ghee, and the cooking liquid was fresh-squozen oranges from our tree with a blop of chicken Better Than Bouillon whisked in.

Things are pretty good, it feels like we might get to take a real breath soon and this year might not be the absolute shitshow it started out as. On the other hand, I want my fucking dog back.
posted by Lyn Never at 7:46 PM on April 13, 2019 [12 favorites]

Open thread? Every time I pull on a open thread, it unravels and a major body part falls off. Or at least that's what it feels like. But the last two weeks have been slipping slipping into the lyrics of a Steve Miller song, starting with an April Foolish Day in which I could not find my supply of stick-on googly eyes, then couldn't peel off the backings, and got totally confused when March Madness overflowed more than a week into April, and as my health continued to deteriorate, I imagined myself unable to fit into Captain Pike's motorized wheelchair and refusing to take Davros' instead. Still, I'm as close to "stable" as I can be without sharing my bedroom with a horse.
posted by oneswellfoop at 7:47 PM on April 13, 2019 [8 favorites]

My wife and I have been playing video games on the couch and watching old Game of Thrones episodes in anticipation of tomorrow's final season premier. It's been a great evening.
posted by Fizz at 7:47 PM on April 13, 2019 [12 favorites]

You just like to say "my wife"!
posted by Eyebrows McGee (staff) at 7:56 PM on April 13, 2019 [28 favorites]

I was scooping cat poop this morning when I came across poop that looked decidedly wrong—since I have two kitties, I began imagining expensive tests, vet visits, etc. for both. Then as I turned to climb the stairs back into the house I saw my pudgy girl balanced on the shelf near the stairs with her head inside the sack of Epsom Salts I’d stored there. She was very sad when I removed her and took away the bag. I was happy because I solved the poop mystery. Cats are so weird.
posted by agatha_magatha at 8:01 PM on April 13, 2019 [16 favorites]

I got a package from the government
The other day
I opened and read it
It said you may die soon
They'd sold me that premium shit
Picture me in the dark, taking a long hit 🔥🔥🔥🔥😤😤😤
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 8:08 PM on April 13, 2019 [4 favorites]

I can't shoehorn these into the kids thread on the Blue because they're just funny things my kids said, but:

My daughter, age 4: Daddy, repeat after me. "As a ballet dancer... I promise to dance wonderfully... and to help everyone dance with me... good."


My son, age 8: Daddy, when you want movies to have sad endings, every movie has a sad ending. Because if the movie's ending is actually sad, then it is sad. If the movie's ending is actually happy, then you will be sad anyway because the ending is not what you wanted.
posted by a snickering nuthatch at 8:09 PM on April 13, 2019 [13 favorites]

Trying to sew with faux leather for the first time. AAAGH. The thread is the least of the problems.
posted by Melismata at 8:14 PM on April 13, 2019 [1 favorite]

I got to see Hadestown on Broadway and it was SO GOOD.

I'm seeing it next week and have gotten myself stupidly excited in a very short period of time, which is mostly Natalie Walker's fault on Twitter, but also I've listened to "Why We Build the Wall" an irrational number of times in the past couple days.
posted by zachlipton at 8:30 PM on April 13, 2019 [2 favorites]

I rarely go out, because I am a chronically ill introvert, but I have an abundance of things coming up. Tomorrow, Kid Ruki and I are going to a showing of a movie whose title I forgot, but the point is that Kyle MacLachlan will be there. Then we'll grab dinner and go see John Mulaney and Pete Davidson. In two weeks, we'll take the kid to see Book of Mormon, which the mister and I have already seen, and later in the week, my girl gang and I are going to the theatrical premiere of MST3K's Mac and Me with Joel Hodgson. I wonder what Paul Rudd's doing that day?

In May, the kid and I are going to a show in Hartford, I'm buying massages for the gang for my birthday, and then the fam is spending Memorial Day weekend in NYC, where we'll finally see Hamilton (the kid has already seen it, but the mister and I haven't) and do a tasting menu at a Michelin restaurant as my birthday gift to them. The mister tells me that I don't seem to understand how birthdays work, what with me buying gifts for other people. But I set intentions on my birthday the way people make New Year's resolutions (because it's my new year) and I want to enter my 40s with kindness and generosity.
posted by Ruki at 8:35 PM on April 13, 2019 [12 favorites]

Can I put this here?
Some guy paid for my weekly imported junk food run last night. Neither he nor his friend hit on me. After reminiscing on junk food we loved as military brats, they ended the conversation by mentioning that their wives were waiting on them. Apparently, there really are still actual nice people out there.

I REALLY needed that reminder last night.

Today I walked into my favorite thrift store and within five minutes found a dress that is just perfect for a friend. I'm surprising her with it tomorrow. Crossing fingers that it fits, though if it doesn't, it's worth it to me to have it altered. (that said, if you're in Austin, please check out my current ask?)
posted by MuChao at 8:52 PM on April 13, 2019 [15 favorites]

Oh good, I was waiting for an introvert to chime in because I loved this earlier today and need to share it with someone. William Carlos Williams for Introverts. From McSweeney's.

“This Is Just to Say”

I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox

It is
so much
for me

to tell you this
in a note
rather than
in person
posted by HotToddy at 8:54 PM on April 13, 2019 [24 favorites]

But I set intentions on my birthday the way people make New Year's resolutions (because it's my new year)

Wow, I thought I was the only one!
posted by MuChao at 8:54 PM on April 13, 2019 [1 favorite]

When I was in law school I ate my roommates plums out of the fridge, thinking they were my plums. She was SUPER MAD and I collapsed in absolute laughter, and I told her:

I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox

and which
you were probably
for breakfast

Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold

And she was like, "Whut" and I showed her the poem and then she laughed and then I bought her new plums and we taped the poem to our fridge in honor of my error. And every time I see this poem I laugh and think of the time I accidentally ate her plums!
posted by Eyebrows McGee (staff) at 9:00 PM on April 13, 2019 [19 favorites]

had a small MeFi meetup in Portland

Small? Small?!?
posted by bendy at 9:34 PM on April 13, 2019 [2 favorites]

But attended by the best Portland has to offer.
posted by bondcliff at 9:46 PM on April 13, 2019 [1 favorite]

The (fully funded, so I'm coming out of the program nearly debt-free) MFA which MetaFilter very sternly told me not to do is coming to an end: I passed my thesis defense, I'm interviewing for (mostly non-academic) jobs. I still have no idea whether it was a good idea or not but I think it was a thing I had to do.
posted by Jeanne at 10:22 PM on April 13, 2019 [25 favorites]

I've been pretty busy for the last few weeks: constant reports and meetings at work, and then last weekend I went to Chicago for my brother's 60th. So between weather, work, illness and traveling I haven't been able to run for a few weeks. I could feel my emotional state circling the drain, and it was really hard to get up and go to work a couple times this week. I was just down. It's been a long wet dark winter here, and I just didn't have any evens, as they say.

Friday (yesterday) was my regular day off (I work a 9/80 schedule) and I slept in, then took the dog up into the redwoods for a 4-mile run.

... turns out that was exactly what I needed. Walking is all very good, but I absolutely have to get my heart-rate up to keep my mental health stable. All of a sudden the world is a better place and maybe I can continue on doing my work and chorus and dog agility classes. The sun is out and my lime tree is blooming and and and.

Crap, I hate being so dependent on my exercise schedule, but it's also really good to know that I can make myself feel better. (I know this doesn't work for everyone, but it does for me, and I know it, and I have to remember that I know it.)
posted by suelac at 10:27 PM on April 13, 2019 [8 favorites]

My dearly loved roommates are about to have their first kid in 6 weeks, which means I’ll be front row to the sleep-deprived, poop-stained, topless rollercoaster of the next several months of their lives. They had a huge baby shower in their hometown already, but I’m throwing them a baby baby shower here where we live to help bring new friends together.

They are also my first friends to procreate, so their little nugget is receiving all of my maternal energy. I’m super looking forward to it, and to helping - I always expected I would love playing the role of aunt. Now I get to live the reality of it, and hopefully also see if the idea of parenthood lands well with me personally. My therapist said this might be a gateway baby...
posted by Snacks at 10:37 PM on April 13, 2019 [7 favorites]

Weeeeee I'm about as depressed as a muddy pothole with some soggy roadkill in it - but it's more or less intentional and a known quantity. I currently have to jump through some hoops with insurance shenanigans in order to get to treatment C from treatment A via treatment B which is totally expected to fail. And it so obviously is, blargh, and hopefully it's over in a week or two.

Thankfully I know how to do nauseous, moody and anxious, so for the past few days that's meant mostly playing Kittens Game, drinking enough coffee and tea to tan cowhide, curling up in my hammock, piling on the sleeping bags and taking naps and waiting for Kittens Game and just riding it out.

The hummingbird feeder is being kept full, the compost is getting turned (with lots of coffee grinds, heh), I even managed to do a little driveway rut repair and get properly sore with a crowbar and shovel.

Spring has sprung, with all speed and serious earnestness. The frogs and salamanders are going bonkers, the crocuses and daffodils we didn't know we had have basically exploded everywhere, the forest finches and jays are throwing forest raves and I think I've spotted wild strawberries in a few places and don't let the existential dread set in - don't let it set in - and hey there's a rain soaked furbeast loaf of a cat and she wants to climb right into my hammock with me oh my god you cat.
posted by loquacious at 10:56 PM on April 13, 2019 [11 favorites]

I had good fortune! Two weeks ago I ran my first half marathon ever, and I really wanted to finish in under 90 minutes. My final time was 88:08, so yay for that. I am happy because I am 40 and I worry about my body starting to betray me, but there were guys in their 50s at the race running faster than me so I feel good about that.

Anyway that isn't the good fortune, but it leads to it. A friend of mine registered for the Seoul Half Marathon on April 28 but found out earlier this week he wouldn't be able to go. It was after the refund date, but he was able to switch the registration name to mine and now I am going to run my second half marathon in two weeks, YAY!
posted by Literaryhero at 10:57 PM on April 13, 2019 [7 favorites]

Oh good, I was hoping for an open thread. Best wishes to everyone who's having a hard spring one way and another.
I'm in that weird stage of a cold where nothing feels quite real: I know I'm going to feel awful tomorrow, just in time for a heavy day at work, but right now it's kind of nice.
Yesterday I went for a yearly breast exam ("looks fine, are you checking regularly?" " husband is...") and then for a long long walk, somewhat longer than I meant because I just missed the little tiny train that skims the western edge of the city, running once every half hour. I saw lots of late-period cherry blossoms, went by the edge of the red-light district, passed four elderly men in a park, one in a wheelchair, playing one game of shogi and one game of go--there could be worse ways to grow old, with sunlight and cherries and pals--ate a huge Thai lunch, and then went to the garden center for this year's veranda plants. Habanero, cherry tomato, eggplant--my first try at eggplant, let's see if it works--and Moroccan mint.
DirtyOldTown, your kid got about the nicest compliment I can think of; kudos to him and to you for raising him that way.
bondcliff, if I may paraphrase: It's Hanshin Tigers season, and they are totally sucking so far, but it's ok because it's Hanshin Tigers season.
Take care, all.
posted by huimangm at 11:12 PM on April 13, 2019 [8 favorites]

I just found out my credit score is 820. That's not what I would have guessed, but ok. I guess that explains why the unsolicited credit card and home refi offer junk mail keeps my shredder so busy.
posted by ctmf at 11:32 PM on April 13, 2019 [2 favorites]

Recently; ate some cake, went into the meadows before dawn because before dawn, ate more cake, walked, ate more cake, started to plan long trips to Iowa and Norway.
posted by Wordshore at 12:18 AM on April 14, 2019 [14 favorites]

Best wishes to everyone who's having a hard spring one way and another.
(↑ me an hour ago) Or a hard autumn! I forgot the southern hemisphere.
posted by huimangm at 12:23 AM on April 14, 2019 [2 favorites]

I'm now the proud co-owner of an...antebellum Victorian mansion. Or, to be more precise, half of one. It's kind of not small, but at least I'll never have to complain about lack of book space again. And, as a colleague says, I am probably going to have a huge fund of horrifying/entertaining stories about household maintenance for the remainder of my career...
posted by thomas j wise at 2:11 AM on April 14, 2019 [16 favorites]

Pepper actually spent some time just lying on me this morning and not because she wanted buttscratches! Exciting times. She is a generally a 'l like you but I prefer to be near you not on you' cat so this was very exciting. She generally will only get on you when you are lying down in bed though.

I'm definitely looking forward to the two four day weeks coming up. My parents are coming to visit for the Easter weekend (get to meet the grancats). I have started growing potatoes - I have an early cropper, a maincrop and a salad in giant pots.
posted by halcyonday at 2:12 AM on April 14, 2019 [6 favorites]

On Friday I returned from a trip with my mother, who's 80 and cool in many ways. We travelled by train to several German Hanseatic cities: we saw a bit of Lübeck, a lot of Wismar, and a reasonable amount of Stralsund. All three are well worth your time if you can swing it. On the other hand, the island Rügen didn't really do much for us (but the weather didn't help either)(and we did, at least, see Prora if only from the train)(and it's probably great if you can go hiking in Jasmund park). Sassnitz is not all that charming, but we did spend some pleasant time in a cafe watching the sea.
We saw a lot of brick Gothic churches (pretty amazing!), very impressive brick storage houses in the harbours (neat!) found some swell places to eat and all in all had a great little trip.

I feel lucky that we can still do and enjoy this together.
posted by Too-Ticky at 3:22 AM on April 14, 2019 [13 favorites]

Mr. Mon Dieu was off almost all last week, due to a very painful tooth abscess, as he was on antibiotics to calm it down so the novocaine would work when they went to yank it. We went into the dentist Friday afternoon, 3:00 appointment, and they almost didn't pull it, as the numbing agents still weren't working as well as they should. Envisioning another weekend of pain, he said "just do it!" And they did, but they had to close the door because he was screaming. I didn't hear any of this, I guess they have good insulation? They are very good there, and took good care of him, so we'll be going back for maintenance to make sure he keeps up with his dental health, do NOT want a repeat of this again!

I've been making him soft food, like salmon with pureed mango sauce, which looked like baby food, and boxed mashed potatoes. He'd never had boxed mashed potatoes before he met me. It was something we grew up on, as my Mom embraced every packaged convenience food from Hamburger Helper to Steak-ums, and all the frozen TV dinners, so much so that we had a complete dishware set made up of those round beige plastic plates, from the 1980's. I always add extra butter, so maybe that's the part he likes, because I find them pretty awful otherwise, and bought them on a whim once, when I was in a hurry.

Yesterday, he was much better, graduating to cretons on an English muffin, lightly toasted, spread with cretons, then broiled for a few minutes. It's basically a spiced pork spread, similar to French rillettes. They make it in a town about 30 minutes away, and it's sold in most stores in Maine, due to a lot of French-Canadian people having migrated here years ago, including some of my ancestors.

Yesterday we got up to 70 degrees, which is way above average for this time of year. We still have dirty snow mounds, and the lake hasn't broken free of the ice yet. We went to the grocery store in a nearby town, and their lake was open water, with a few grey sheets of ice. They're always ahead of us by a few days, and I am looking forward to seeing the water again, as you forget how much it reflects everything, and the movement is mesmerizing. Also: I want to photograph some water birds, Great Blue Herons, loons (and their babies!), ducks, whatever else I can find.

So far, in addition to my eagle photo, I have photographed an Eastern Phoebe, and some funny little robins, who came after the snow last Monday, and flitted around down near the lakeshore. They are so fast! I'm sure we will get nuthatches and woodpeckers soon, as well as songbirds. I know they are out there, seen them on the Maine Birds FB page, but our yard is still pretty wet, which I found out last week when I went down to check the oil level and sank in my clogs in sticky mud. But soon, I can go out and sit on our little side porch, and practice taking photos with my new camera.

We opened the windows yesterday, shut off the furnace, and I cleaned the fans. My box fan now pushes out air like an airplane engine. Kato the cat was very excited about the windows being open, and running around like crazy, as he has 2 he can get into, the 3rd was above the kitchen sink, and we did have a few counter surfing attempts, but nothing got knocked down. Today we have to do a mountain of laundry at the laundromat, and more grocery shopping, as I have made a bunch of mini-trips to buy special food, but haven't planned any meals for the week, and I have a stiff neck from all the chores I did yesterday, so that should be fun. If I had a magic superpower, it would be waving my hand and having my kitchen cleaned up and laundry magically cleaned and put away. But otherwise, things are good, and it looks like no more snow this season (crossing my fingers!). Super happy that Mr. Mon Dieu is on the mend, and that his employer is understanding about the time off, and very grateful for dental insurance, out of the 2 visits, we only had to pay $67 out of pocket.

Bonus cat tax: Miss MoneyPenny, being cute, here, and here.

Hugs to anyone who wants them, and is going through stuff.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 3:53 AM on April 14, 2019 [11 favorites]

For the next couple of kilometers I sang some songs to let any other bears know I was coming: TMBG and Ramones.

What TMBG songs? In situations where I am alone and creeped out, I gravitate toward “Kiss Me Son of God,” for some reason... although I’ve never been 20 m from a bear (as far as I know!).
posted by eirias at 4:02 AM on April 14, 2019 [1 favorite]

As I type this I am walking the fenceline of the gardens where I work. Signs of spring include healthy patches of nettles coming up, luxurious skunk cabbage leaves along a stream, speckled dogtooth violet leaves, a chorus of fervently territorial birds, some energetic bumblebees, pinky-grey budding magnolias, and so on.

Other than that life is kind of in a sucky place. I’ll be ignoring that as much as I can, putting my head down and getting to work.
posted by sciencegeek at 5:08 AM on April 14, 2019 [6 favorites]

I had a busy week at work but not manic like the end of last week after vacation. I saw my current rheumatologist hopefully for the last time, as when asked how I can improve my fibromyalgia related fatigue, he told me to find the joy in my life and asked if I was still single... Looking for a replacement! I’ve got Michelle Obama’s book tour on Tuesday and am so so excited! Hugs to anyone who needs them.
posted by ellieBOA at 5:15 AM on April 14, 2019 [10 favorites]

It was my birthday on Thursday. It also happened to be our monthly lgbtqia+ hangout night, so I was treated to a lovely cake and a nice evening all around.

Tuesday is our last queer book club of the season. We’re reading Fruit by Brian Francis, a book I cannot recommend enough.

Here is a picture of my cat lounging on top of the fridge.
posted by janepanic at 5:16 AM on April 14, 2019 [13 favorites]

Happy birthday! 🌈🌈🌈
posted by ellieBOA at 5:17 AM on April 14, 2019 [1 favorite]

Also, this week I learned that knowing how to drive a stick shift is not a requirement for being a parking valet.
posted by still_wears_a_hat at 6:17 AM on April 14, 2019 [5 favorites]

Tiny bit of anxiety today. See, the main system I maintain/develop for at work has had a massive upgrade over the weekend. All well and good, but it means that one of the absolutely crucial database processes we used to run against it will no longer work and we need a functional replacement.

Enter...this guy, who wrote a Python script that does what the old process did (and in about a third of the time with better error handling, he bragged). So far, so good.

It's just really hit me today, though, that the ENTIRE PROPER FUNCTIONING OF THIS SYSTEM absolutely depends on a thing I wrote in like a day and that I'm only about 95% sure accomplishes everything it needs to.

It goes live tomorrow morning. If you need me, I'll be requisitioning a large blanket and a cup of tea and going fetal under my desk.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 6:23 AM on April 14, 2019 [9 favorites]

I have been sober for a year as of today, y'all.
posted by joycehealy at 6:40 AM on April 14, 2019 [89 favorites]

Woke up to snow on the ground...hopefully for the last time this season.
Nice laidback Sunday ahead: I’m planning to make homemade vegetable soup, wash my hair, finish the laundry, and also do a lot of reading and cat snuggling. Probably a nap will slide in there at some point.
Tomorrow I start my new job at the library and I’m a bit nervous, but in an excited /nervous way. I really can’t wait!
posted by bookmammal at 7:22 AM on April 14, 2019 [8 favorites]

Oh yes, Dr Bored for Science and I have been working out in the evenings, and after a month of that, we're both in better shape than we've been in for years, and, if anything, it's cut down on my desire to snack. I'll take it.
posted by Making You Bored For Science at 7:24 AM on April 14, 2019 [7 favorites]

My city hosted a marathon today, and this year for the first time they took advantage of all the closed roads and had a 30-ish mile cycle ride as well. It was at the crack of dawn (because it had to finish before the marathon started) and freezing cold to start but it was a really nice ride. I don't do this kind of thing often so I was happy to make it up all the (small) hills without stopping and get round the whole route without needing to stop (except for wees).
posted by EndsOfInvention at 7:25 AM on April 14, 2019 [5 favorites]

I've had bronchitis since last weekend and I am SO DONE with being sick. I went to the doctor on Monday and got heavy-duty antibiotics and steroids (I have asthma and a history of pneumonia that sent me into sepsis so they don't mess around) and spent most of the week on the couch and I'm breathing better now, no residual rattle, but the heavy-duty antibiotics fucked with my gut and that's not pleasant. So, mostly better but still completely over it mentally.

Son graduates from college in May and how have four years gone by so quickly?! Daughter finishes up her freshman year in college in May and I can already see the end for her, again so fast! I don't really *feel* like a parent to adult children. It's weird. They were little just the other day. I definitely feel like I was pretty good about living in the moment and appreciating whatever stage we were at but the years really did just fly by and I wish they hadn't. I'd like a do-over because I really liked parenting. I know I'm still their parent and they'll still need me for stuff but it's not the same and I guess I need to grieve that in some way.

My new job is great, I'm really happy I made the decision to leave the old one.

Hugs to everyone who needs/wants one, congratulations to everyone who has good news!
posted by cooker girl at 7:26 AM on April 14, 2019 [12 favorites]

I rode my bike to a bookstore that was maybe 3km away. this was my practice for getting ready for my 9km bike commute to work. I discovered that I am even more out of shape than I had thought. I see a few painful weeks ahead but look forward to all the fresh air.
posted by biggreenplant at 7:29 AM on April 14, 2019 [7 favorites]

When I saw the opening comment from clavdivs on this thread, the first thing I did was check their profile to see if they're near me in the DC area, 'cause I've been searching. Darn.

In other news, I bought myself a VERY loud shirt on Ebay that my spouse does not care for. It's the kind of loud "who killed the couch?" shirt that one only wears to poker games. I love it.
posted by duffell at 7:30 AM on April 14, 2019 [4 favorites]

I just need to rant. I have a paper (final version) due tomorrow, and my professor still hasn’t provided feedback on the draft I submitted two weeks ago. Wtf?? I emailed her Wednesday and she said my paper was “tenth in the stack.” WTF??? Like why whyyyy would you offer to review drafts if you can’t return them in a timely manner?

Also it’s fucking snowing. It was like 80°F a few days ago and it’s snowing. Spring, you are an asshole.
posted by obfuscation at 7:34 AM on April 14, 2019 [5 favorites]

I am super freaked out about money because my ex just moved out and I can't afford our place on my own but also can't deal with living with another human again (just the cats) and I'm really upset because even though I am a fully employed professional, the rent's still too damn high unless I want to live in under 600 square feet in an area where fine crack products are bought and sold. My brother is going to help me out for a bit, but wtf late stage capitalism, this is just unreasonable.

On the upside, I realized a little bit ago that I was running out of time to see the Egypt's Sunken Cities exhibit and complained on the internet that I wasn't going to get to go because I'm having a bad flare of my RA and did someone want to come with me and push me around in a wheelchair so the floors in that museum don't wreck me for days (they are really hard floors, and cause me a lot of pain even if I'm not flaring), and a bunch of my friends were like HELL YES ANCIENT SUBMERGED CITY and came and took turns pushing me around and we got to see all these artifacts from this Egyptian port city that was submerged by rising sea levels and it was just amazing.
posted by bile and syntax at 8:01 AM on April 14, 2019 [23 favorites]

Marie Mon Dieu, your photos, especially the bird photos, are wonderful! That second robin photo made me laugh. I have robins and phoebes (I'm guessing Western phoebes?) out here, along with scrub jays (who are currently taunting the cats) and Western bluebirds and tree swallows (I think) and hawks -- I think the red tail hawks have pushed out the red-shouldered hawks for the season.

ellieBOA, SO GLAD you are looking for a new rheumatologist! What an awful thing to say!
posted by lazuli at 8:02 AM on April 14, 2019 [8 favorites]

I am mostly good, though sore. I volunteered for about five hours yesterday with our local Rebuilding Together chapter. I was assigned to a group helping make the home of a disabled man livable and safe. I spent pretty much the entire time pulling out ivy and juniper bushes. I did not previously have any opinion on ivy or juniper bushes; I now have many, many strong feelings on both. It also felt nice to be able to provide some emotional validation for the homeowner's adult granddaughter, who was directing us what to do.

I have been much more outspoken than normal in the last few days and I'm not quite sure what that's about but I think it's mainly a good thing. In two instances it was work-related and pretty appropriate, just a bit more forceful than I would have been in the past about what I thought was right. Then at a UU meeting on Friday night I went on a bit of a heartfelt rant about how the religion and the way that our groups are set up can end up coddling white supremacy/able-ism/transphobia/cultural appropriation/other oppressions because we're so focused on being "nice" rather than actually enacting our values, and it's making me question how involved I really want to be, which was kind of related to the topic at hand (and definitely triggered by everyone acting like it was totally normal to ask multiple women in a group to apologize because one male member of the group "didn't like strong women" and felt intimidated when they objected to what he said -- which, I can't even and didn't even because that rant would have gone on for weeks) but not really the focus of the group. There was a fair amount of people then trying to claim that our congregation doesn't have any racism (it does) but then things shimmied out of the fragility thing at least a bit and people seemed to take me a bit more seriously that this is something that we should address at our next meeting. (There wasn't enough time to go farther than that.) So... we'll see? I seem to be launching a midlife career change as a cranky SJW. I'm ok with that.

And THIS WEEK is what I'm calling Spring Break and I have the week off and I am looking forward to spending time with friends and hiking and having a clean house (which I will need to clean first, before I can appreciate the having of it) and spending time with cats.
posted by lazuli at 8:22 AM on April 14, 2019 [16 favorites]

This week I reconnected with my high-school best friend, who I hadn't talked to for over 30 years. Although we'd stayed in touch for a few years after school, eventually our separate lives drifted in different directions and we somehow stopped maintaining our connection. I'd wondered about him over the years but had never had any luck finding him with basic Internet searches. Earlier this week, though, I tried doing an image search on his name; after scrolling down a ways I eventually found a picture that I thought looked pretty much like the version of his face in my memory + 30 years. It turned out the image's site was a "hire me to do magic shows for parties, conferences, restaurants, etc." That clinched it, because my friend was already into doing close-up magic back in high school. I texted the number on the site and asked whether he'd gone to so-and-so high school and had a friend named Greg; he immediately recognized me and was delighted to hear from me. We've got a phone call planned later today to catch up. Woo!
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:15 AM on April 14, 2019 [21 favorites]

Oh, and after years and years away, I've finally bit the bullet and am starting back at a gym tomorrow. Still not quite sure how I feel about it, but something had to be done.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 10:31 AM on April 14, 2019 [8 favorites]

Ever have one of those weeks where everything is a contradiction? I am happysad. It would be fair though to say that since there's been not so much happy recently that the happy is winning.

My band is going to be playing at a Pretty Big Event in June and I am bursting, we totally got the gig through a back door but I do NOT care, it's a huge opportunity and it's going to be the most fun. The glow from that is likely what's tipping the scales. Talking about logistics and thinking about the set list and telling people about it...squee
posted by wellred at 10:48 AM on April 14, 2019 [9 favorites]

This weekend is the first really cold one here in Santiago, Chile. I went bike riding anyway, it was cold and the air is kind of dirty, but I recently lost weight so all forms of exercise feel better now than a few months ago.
I just got a new Flanger pedal for my pedalboard (which I designed myself and had a friend cut on his CNC Router), which makes 17 pedals, which is starting to feel excessive instead just a cool way to channel my mid-life crisis.
posted by signal at 11:02 AM on April 14, 2019 [5 favorites]

Mr. Bad Example: I've finally bit the bullet and am starting back at a gym tomorrow.

posted by Too-Ticky at 11:04 AM on April 14, 2019 [3 favorites]

disabled self while clenching teeth and keeping eyes closed, will adjust - currently wrapped in blankie with a hot water bottle

toxic sludge from the interwebs (my country is having national elections today) for the past week or two intensified and I've been triggered as a minority woc in a usually very safe and nice nordic environment thanks to the nazi hate garbage being shoved nonstop via digital platforms.

my mltshp is the same tho' since that's closed to tech giant search and doesn't come with 10K comments worth of personal data
posted by hugbucket at 12:03 PM on April 14, 2019 [7 favorites]

Am favouriting all the good newses, folks! Yay joycehealy, keep it up! Happy birthday to everyone!
posted by hugbucket at 12:06 PM on April 14, 2019

Okay, well. My professor got back to me on the paper and gave me an extension, so I'll stop bitching now.
posted by obfuscation at 12:10 PM on April 14, 2019 [8 favorites]

Took the mountain bike out for the 2nd time this spring and rode 9+ miles, over hill and dale, through muddy cow paths and dodging poison oak. Had to walk a few times but not too bad. Now I have to go pull weeds before I can shower.
posted by suelac at 12:33 PM on April 14, 2019 [5 favorites]

I'm in Fiji, eating breakfast beside the beach, getting ready for the final two dives to get my scuba certificate.

Scuba diving has been magical, the amount of marine life you're surrounded by is staggering. The whole family is having a great time here, it's exactly the holiday I needed after a very long first quarter at work.

My colitis has not appreciated the island bacterial make up, unfortunately, and I've finally raised the white flag this morning and had only plain yoghurt and congee for breakfast. That being said I ate everything and anything prior. Hopefully it will clear up soon.

I really do love reading all the mefite updates, I count so many of you as friends (even if it's not reciprocated!), it's lovely to hear about the rhythms of your lives.
posted by smoke at 12:40 PM on April 14, 2019 [22 favorites]

Ever have one of those weeks where everything is a contradiction? I am happysad. It would be fair though to say that since there's been not so much happy recently that the happy is winning.

I am in a similar state of happystressed. We are in the process of buying a new house (offer accepted, but still have to go through inspection, appraisal, and financing). Oh yeah, and we still have to sell our current house. It's my first time going through this as an adult and it's all a bit daunting.

But! I love our new house. And I am finding new ways to manage my stress. Recently started doing yoga at home (thanks Youtube!) and it's helping a ton. Just have to get through the next little while.
posted by cozenedindigo at 1:19 PM on April 14, 2019 [4 favorites]

Phone call done and preliminary catch-up accomplished. It was just like old times. Double woo!
posted by Greg_Ace at 2:41 PM on April 14, 2019 [9 favorites]

A while back, I bought one of those three tiered hanging wire fruit baskets. So then I bought the biggest freaking jam, ever, and put it in there up near the top. Then it sprouted branches and started heading toward the ceiling the leaves are webby, halloween like, pointy. So I took it down and lopped off about six inches that hosts the plant, and potted it. The rest is on the counter getting ready to be food for me, yes it will have to share its energy resources, I still have a foot length of yam to cook. It is a fantastic spring with billions of various wildflowers up in the hills. Couldn't ask for more. Oh but I fell again, in the gutter, trying to walk along the inside of a car, rather than on the outside on a curve. I have no presence of mind when I fall, I coulda just pushed off the side of the car and fallen on grass, but nope, curb and gutter, for me. I got up, and walked a coupla more miles. The palm sized bruises are almost healed. I love being in a whole lot better shape than I was a year ago.
posted by Oyéah at 2:53 PM on April 14, 2019 [6 favorites]

Today was a memorial service for my very much beloved great aunt. I've been feeling my emotions lately and so I cried, which was unintentional, but it was very nice to participate in (and my creepy cousin did not show up). We shared anecdotes and stories about Aunt Gina - a sex therapist earth mother Boston Brahmin who has been with my Aunt Jo since the 70s. Here's mine:
Last year, I was staying at the Taj while the house I was renting a room in was being renovated (they had very nice insurance). Aunt Jo and Gina picked me up to go Aunt E's 75th birthday party in their Subaru (of course) and Aunt Gina was wearing an amazing red velvet rhinestone spangled cowboy hat. They had a black velvet rhinestone spangled cowboy hat for Aunt Jo, but since I so vociferously admired Aunt Gina's, they gave me Jo's hat and I did indeed wear it for much of the party, and back to the Taj. When I walked in, the doorman said "Whoa ... that's a lot of hat!" and I said "Thank you ... it was a gift from my Aunt" and he said "Whoa. She must be a lot of Aunt!"
posted by ChuraChura at 3:31 PM on April 14, 2019 [23 favorites]

I just finished editing the annual autonomous queer edition of our student newspaper.

The person who was supposed to do it with me apparently didn't understand the task at all, and so decided it wouldn't be necessary to help, so since Friday I've been almost constantly working towards the 9AM Monday deadline I just passed.

I'm bubbling with all kinds of emotion, a little bit of pride, a whole lot of fear and insecurity, but at least it's done now. Months of prep and a couple of new skillsets all finally finished. I'll get to see the physical paper tomorrow. Fingers crossed.
posted by AnhydrousLove at 4:11 PM on April 14, 2019 [8 favorites]

Tomorrow morning I am heading to the mountains for a 5 day solo retreat. I can't tell you how much I am looking forward to it. I don't think I've had this long alone in over a decade. Delicious.

Also, some good news (finally!). I got into a program that at the end of 3 years, I will be ordained. It's a Jewish feminist program, but not rabbinical. I'm quite looking forward to being a scholar again.

Garden is doing beautifully. Peas and lettuce for dinners as far as the eye can see and plenty of artichokes. Peppers, tomatoes, squash all coming along nicely. Chickens are back to laying every day. The bounty of spring is definitely upon us in Southern California.
posted by Sophie1 at 4:31 PM on April 14, 2019 [11 favorites]

Oh. Wow. The anniversary of the last time I saw my mother passed a few days ago without my remembering that it was looming or happening. For a bit I've been a super emotional mess and trying to figure out why. And it just hit me. At least now I can let go and have a good cry. This kind of crying makes all the muscles in my throat hurt. Does anyone else get that?

Having my tonsils out in 10 days is going to extra suck because now I'm likely to be fixated on the mom stuff. Sheesh no wonder the conversations I've been having with people about having kids have felt so fraught.

I need a hug.
posted by bilabial at 4:32 PM on April 14, 2019 [20 favorites]

Hug for bilabial ( )
So sorry to all the other people who are also sad, or hurt, and/or otherwise injured. May your better days come soon!

I turned 50 this year and I am trying to paint seriously, a thing I have tried to do sporadically since being talked out of art school at 18. I am much less terrible at acrylic painting than when I started but still a long way from professional, whatever that is, and feeling like I need to choose a direction and actually finish some large planned paintings. (While periodically telling myself I should work in oils but then I remember all the added headache that entails.)

But still several times a day I remember that fascism is currently on a worldwide upswing, the U.S. is a horrifying parody of... something, and I feel entirely angry and drained and hopeless. And I think I should use some of that to paint something but not sure what thing. An angry thing? A hopeful thing?

I also went through my old comments recently which reminded me of this most excellent thing, and if anyone reading this would like a nice cry then please refer to Isaac's Live Lip Dub Proposal.. and bring tissues.
posted by Glinn at 5:07 PM on April 14, 2019 [5 favorites]

Greg_Ace, that reminds me, I used to be best friends with a little girl who lived down the road from us, and we were in the same class in grade school. We moved away when I was in 4th grade, and I did see her a few times when I was in Junior High, and then we lost touch, then got in touch once or twice when we were both adults.

When I moved back to Maine, I tried to find her, to no avail. A year ago, I found her on Facebook, and we got together. She is the most mellow person in the world, and we can talk about anything. We don't talk about politics, ever. We talk about our families, or other stuff, and she is such a calm person, she always knows the right thing to say in any situation. It's like we were never apart, playing with our Barbies, riding bikes down a country road, not caring what the outside world was doing. It's the most magical thing that's happened to me, finding my best friend from childhood again.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 5:09 PM on April 14, 2019 [10 favorites]

Howdy all, I hope you're having a wonderful weekend or whatever it is you're up to. A stranger approached us at dinner Friday and gave me two tickets to the Broadway tour of Hello, Dolly! that was in town for a week. It started about 30 mins from when they handed them to us. So that was neat. What a silly, silly musical. Dolly, you are a terrible matchmaker! You can't just poach the rich, old guy!

I socialized with 10+ cats on Saturday at a refuge, but I don't know if I'm ready to adopt a second one again after how traumatic my best cuddle partner died. But I really, really miss a cuddly cat on my lap. Loss is hard. Hugs to everyone also going through things. That sounds very hard, bilabial.
posted by OnTheLastCastle at 5:14 PM on April 14, 2019 [7 favorites]

I’m trying to buy the house I’ve been renting, without a realtor. In the last week I’ve met in person or by phone with eight different house-related professionals, done some hardcore negotiating, had a guy come and cut a hole in the floor so someone else could come and tell me my crawl space has serious problems, filled out a lot of forms, and repeatedly vacuumed. This would have been hard anyway, but I was also half dead from the flu all week. I’m kind of a badass, maybe, but I’m also EXHAUSTED. I picked up a friend at the airport today and realized she was the first adult I’d had a conversation with that wasn’t about wiring/insulation/asbestos/the inside of my sewer pipes since last Saturday. I’ve learned a lot, but this purchase will probably fall through when the property gets appraised, so it’s all kind of a waste of time!

On the up side, I brought my kid to the aquarium this morning and spent a lot of time watching otters and seals frolic. The crabapple tree in my yard has burst into glorious magenta bloom, I have thirty-three tomato seedlings and seven different kinds of cucurbits growing in starter pots in my kitchen, and I have learned the wonderful secret that what’s under the ugly carpet in my house is nice hardwood. And best of all, I can sit up for more than half an hour without needing a nap again, which is always nice.
posted by centrifugal at 5:51 PM on April 14, 2019 [6 favorites]

I found out on Friday that the firm I've been interviewing with wants to hire me. I have a call with a managing partner on Monday. The place I've been working at has gotten progressively worse because the newly promoted research director is super toxic and a bully to everyone in the office. I really like the rest of my coworkers: they've been some of the best people I've ever worked with. I will be sad to leave, but also really excited to be starting something new and getting out of an environment that is not ideal.
posted by cirgue at 9:00 PM on April 14, 2019 [5 favorites]

Today I missed the bus to the Metro by like 20 seconds and had to walk 3 miles (they only come every hour). Then on the way back, I missed the return bus by like 10 seconds, and walked another 3 miles. I actually felt pretty good about walking -- saved me $4, I didn't have to rely on anyone else for a ride, and I got some exercise (according to my phone, I walked 6.9 miles in total, which is a pretty good considering I hadn't set out to get any exercise at all).

My life is a total wreck otherwise (actually, walking up just in time to see the bus pull away is actually a pretty good metaphor for how things are going). BUT I've been listening to a lot of punk and hardcore this week, which means that I'm basically reliving my teen years in my 30s. Which... hold on, that's not good either.
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 9:50 PM on April 14, 2019 [8 favorites]

One really nice thing is that there appears to be an approaching thunderstorm, and even if it ultimately fizzles out, it's the first thunder I've heard in YEARS. I loved California, but I always missed the thunderstorms I grew up with.
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 9:53 PM on April 14, 2019 [6 favorites]

hugs for bilabial, I specialize in providing for those in need with my eternally refilling bucket of hugs

oyeah *ouch*

churachura pls tweet photo of that hat now ;p

and smoke... fiji? fiji? my lifelong dream as a kid was to stow away to fiji from Klang
posted by hugbucket at 11:52 PM on April 14, 2019 [2 favorites]

Today I missed the bus to the Metro by like 20 seconds and had to walk 3 miles (they only come every hour). Then on the way back, I missed the return bus by like 10 seconds, and walked another 3 miles. I actually felt pretty good about walking -- saved me $4, I didn't have to rely on anyone else for a ride, and I got some exercise (according to my phone, I walked 6.9 miles in total, which is a pretty good considering I hadn't set out to get any exercise at all).

Dude, what? I thought you borrowed a car! That sucks, I could have given you a ride. I was just heading over to see my grandma after brunch, dropping you at the Metro or something wouldn't have been a big deal.

So, one nice thing is that the GPS ended up taking me through Rock Creek Park and around the tidal basin to get back to VA from the brunch place, so that was a surprisingly scenic trip. But as it turned out, I didn't even get to my grandma's until nearly four pm anyway, because when I went to pick up my mom at my parents', she wanted to wait for my dad to get back from the cigarette store before she and I left (I guess she'd run out of cigarettes). But his trip to the store took forever, per usual, and when my dad finally did show up, he had a carton of not-quite-their-brand cigarettes (100s instead of Golds or something), and there had to be a brouhaha because she hates these not-quite-their-brand, but he had smoked some at the store as a "taste test" and they were fine, but my mom had tried them before and already knew she hated them even without another taste test, well but nobody carries Benson & Hedges Golds anymore so she'd better get used to these anyway and blah blab blah. By the way, this bickering is all taking place outside on the porch, as virtually everything always does. Like my dad's nightly drunken tambourine and/or drum practice does, for example. Why no, my parents never get along with any of their next door neighbors, why do you ask? Anyway, so then my mom and I finally get to my grandma's like an hour late, and it's always nice to see her, but she has pretty bad dementia so any conversation with her dissolves into a sort of Samuel Beckett-meets-Laurel-and-Hardy kind of skit. All afternoon with this old people stuff. I mean, I love absurdist humor with the best of them, but jeez, after a few hours my head was done in. It's like in one of those sci-fi shows where the heroes travel to another dimension and it's all topsy-turvy and wild but fairly safe as long as they get out before the return-home portal closes behind them. My dad wanted me to come back over for dinner, but don't worry, I got back home before the portal could close.

A highlight, though, was that in the midst of all this, I was petting my cat while she was trying to have a nap, and she was laying there sort of purring but also sort of snoring. Snurring, if you will. It was adorable.

Anyway, a friend of mine says that eventually everybody becomes their parents, and it always chills me to the bone. I feel like there was a literal thunderclap outside as I wrote that. hahahaha
posted by rue72 at 12:02 AM on April 15, 2019 [9 favorites]

The moral of that story is that I shouldn't have had three cups of coffee at brunch because now I am up at 3am airing dirty laundry. Although to be fair, there is not THAT much else to do at 3am. And it isn't really very dirty laundry, either. It's more like the pair of jeans that you're leaving on the bedroom chair because they're not CLEAN per se but they're not ready for the wash, either.
posted by rue72 at 12:09 AM on April 15, 2019 [9 favorites]

I won a little prize from the department I major in at uni after putting in an immense amount of effort last year, and it's really made me feel much better about the 15,000 words of written work coming due in the second half of this semester. Which I really need to get started on. But I feel much more positive about starting than I did before.
posted by Panthalassa at 4:30 AM on April 15, 2019 [5 favorites]

Today marks the six year anniversary since my dad's two heart attacks (and yes, seeing live footage of the Boston Marathon bombing coverage while in the waiting room didn't exactly make things less stressful). So very thankful he was with family when it happened, got excellent care during and since, and has been recovered quite well.
posted by Twicketface at 7:57 AM on April 15, 2019 [6 favorites]

My spouse mentioned to me the other day that there was a big salmonella outbreak in the US, and thanks to the magic of associative thinking, I immediately added Toll House cookie dough to my mental shopping list, 'cause I like to eat that shit raw.
posted by duffell at 7:57 AM on April 15, 2019 [4 favorites]

Also, in the next few days, someone is going to be the lucky recipient of my 10,000th favorite. I'll MeMail whoever it is when that happens.
posted by duffell at 7:58 AM on April 15, 2019 [6 favorites]

I just submitted my tax return! Woo! 15 hours before deadline. Baaaaaarely even counts as procrastinating.
posted by lazuli at 9:06 AM on April 15, 2019 [3 favorites]

On Wednesday two friends and I finished the first series of a gender-inclusive discussion group about toxic masculinity, which is the culmination of two years of talking and planning (well, mostly talking). We debriefed on Sunday with some great ideas for the next round, so I'm pretty excited that this might actually have legs.
posted by Gorgik at 9:08 AM on April 15, 2019 [4 favorites]

I was knocked out by a cold at the end of last week and over the weekend. I had to cancel on 2 dates, one of which was a concert I was really looking forward to on Friday (Amanda Palmer at the Chicago Theater). My date for that also cancelled, because he was sick.... it makes sense, because about a week and a half ago we had a very fun time together. I found out yesterday that he has strep, so guess who has a lunchtime appointment at the urgent care clinic for a strep test today? Of all of the diseases one could get from burning through Tinder baes at the rate I've been, I'll take strep, hahaha. Because of not feeling well, I'm also behind on Card Club opt-ins -- look for them tomorrow, members!

Work has been crazybusy, lots and lots of stuff going on, and we had a spat of some pretty serious injuries at the end of March, which is never a good thing. But! I have been here almost a year already, and have had lots of management people repeatedly tell me how happy they are that I'm here, so all is well. Just busy.

A very good friend of mine had a baby last Tuesday, and while I haven't been able to meet him in person yet, the pictures look like he is squishy and delicious, and new life is always a joyous thing.

As of Apr 5 my divorce is officially filed, with a case number and everything. Soon-to-be-ex huz also got a lawyer, my lawyer said that she's happy with who he picked, and everything should move along relatively smoothly and free of drama. So, it should be all over in 3-4 months or so. Even with all of that, and me feeling absolutely certain that "yes, this is what I want, I am ready", anything I get from my lawyer or legal document or whatever feels like a punch in the gut. Looking at the legal documents seems sort of like viewing the body at a wake. Physical, unmistakeable evidence that the relationship is dead. Even as toxic as it had become, there were good parts, and I'm still working through that grief. My therapist said that it seems like I am in a really good place with everything, and I feel that way too, so overall, things are good.

Thanks to everyone who shares a part of their personal life here -- like others have said, I really enjoy reading through what everyone is up to, and celebrating or sending love and support from afar. <3
posted by Fig at 9:09 AM on April 15, 2019 [24 favorites]

So, with the legalization of marijuana in my country, my wife and I finally decided to give it a try over the past couple of weeks. We bought some micro-dose capsules that are sativa strain, 1:1 THC and CBD. The first time we tried it was rather wonderful; we had a nice Saturday evening relaxing in the front of some TV and just generally felt good - unrushed, not worried. The second time was still nice, but we did it on Friday night after work and we both were kinda tired and just retreated to our individual corners of the house to do our own thing and I didn't find it as mellow an experience as the first time; I just couldn't settle into doing anything, which was probably part of the problem - I was restless. But the nice thing I'm finding is I'm getting a relaxed sense of well-being without the hangover that comes from booze.

Anyways, it's really mild experimentation I guess, but that's what I am up to. I'm contemplating taking a day off from work somewhere in the future and trying some indica strain, just to see.
posted by nubs at 9:14 AM on April 15, 2019 [3 favorites]

Dude, what? I thought you borrowed a car! That sucks, I could have given you a ride.

Oh, thanks! But I did have a car near the brunch place. It's complicated.

OK, here's the background: the Metro station is 2.6 miles away. My sister's house is .6 miles past that, so it's 3.2 miles to walk straight to her house. My original plan was to take the bus to the Metro station, then take the Metro to Silver Spring. But then my sister offered to let me borrow one of their cars, which saved me time (40 minutes for Metro vs. 15 minutes driving). So -- my plan was to take the bus to the station, walk past the station to my sister's house, then borrow the car and drive. Because I missed the bus, I just ended up walking the whole way. In total, it only took about 45 minutes to walk there, and then I drove the rest of the way to brunch.

After brunch, I stopped at Joe's Record Paradise (didn't buy anything), then drove the car back to my sister's house. Then I walked to the playground with her and my nephew, which was sort of on the way to the station anyway. I misjudged how long it would take to get through the station to the bus bay, so I arrived just in time to see THAT bus driving off. So I just said "fuck it," put on some music, and walked the rest of the way back. I timed myself (which was easy, because the bus left the station on the hour), and it takes exactly 40 minutes to walk back from the station. Like I said, walking wasn't so bad.

The only thing that really peeved me was how unfriendly everyone in Greenbelt is. Every time I'm walking somewhere, almost everyone I pass just gives me a blank glare, if they even look in my direction at all. What is it with unfriendly people in Greenbelt? The only friendly people are older women walking dogs.
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 9:15 AM on April 15, 2019 [3 favorites]

(Mostly) finished the massive system upgrade at work. Now off to have my first session at the gym in at least three or four years. Bit apprehensive.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 9:16 AM on April 15, 2019 [4 favorites]

Oh, and my son got his black belt in karate on Saturday. Very proud of his ability to stick with it and his instructors were very complimentary of his growth since starting three years ago.
posted by Twicketface at 9:16 AM on April 15, 2019 [5 favorites]

Last week I got the first actual promotion of my life, involving both a pay and title bump, finally. I guess this an update to this comment.

A year ago after my review I was self-soothing by posting fuck you, pay me memes to facebook. I was mad that I wasn't being recognized for the work I was doing, and I started advocating for myself hard. Now I make 40% more than I did then. I'm just really proud of myself for not listening to anyone who told me I was being "too aggressive" with management or any of the dozen other criticisms I got for not appreciating my spot in the pink ghetto enough.

In other good news, my best friend Truman turns 7 today. He's the sweetest boy and I was so happy to take him to Petsmart this weekend and spend my paycheck bump on anything his scruffy little heart wanted. (Sadly, the poop another dog left in the reptile aisle was not for sale.)
posted by phunniemee at 9:28 AM on April 15, 2019 [15 favorites]

yaaay, congrats phunniemee AND Happy Birthday Truman !!!
posted by Fig at 9:30 AM on April 15, 2019 [2 favorites]

shapes that haunt the dusk, really sorry to hear that about your experience with Greenbelt. I've found it to be hit-or-miss; people who have lived here a long time seem to be really friendly with each other and have formed a tight-knit community, but that doesn't always translate into welcoming newer or returning folks. We have a bit of an edge because we have a toddler, so people interact with her (and us by extension) a lot more than they might with others.

I'm in the neighborhood, and would be happy to hang out sometime. We have a firepit out back and I love nothing better than to hang out by the fire on a nice evening, with the option for s'mores. We just got a replacement for our old record player, so would be up for a trip to Joe's sometime too. (No pressure, but the offer is open!)
posted by duffell at 10:02 AM on April 15, 2019 [3 favorites]

(negative for strep, yay!)
posted by Fig at 10:19 AM on April 15, 2019 [17 favorites]

Spring update: I just saw the most intense and territorial display from a rufous hummingbird I've ever seen.

I'm sitting outside right now grabbing whatever shreds of sunlight I can get after a week of solid drizzle, the flowers on various vines and plants are popping all around me, and the hummingbirds are cruising and not just relying on my feeder any more.

Well, about 2 feet over my shoulder up an embankment there's some flowers, and a rufous was grazing them and ran into one of our resident Anna hummingbirds doing the same thing.

Uh oh.

The rufous chased the Anna in a extremely intense aerial furball dogfight in and around the compact space of about a cubic foot or two all through the vines and bramble.

Then it cornered the poor Anna and then like, I don't know, exploded and went Super Saiyan by making the loudest wing noises I think I've ever heard from any bird, ever, and started zipping back and forth at the Anna a very precise inch or two like it was teleporting and vibrating in some kind of noisy super position of being in two places at once. The whole body of the rufous was folding back and forth and contorting a remarkable amount at either end of this ultra high speed lunge/retreat display.

That was all so loud and just impossibly fast I'm still not sure if I saw a glitch in the matrix.
posted by loquacious at 11:13 AM on April 15, 2019 [5 favorites]

aerial furball dogfight

Now that would be a good username.
posted by eirias at 11:17 AM on April 15, 2019 [2 favorites]

Re: my first post in this thread

Yep, I got it. Currently purging out the back door (which, it has to be said, is my preferred egress if I had to choose, so I'm hoping it stays that way).
posted by soren_lorensen at 11:46 AM on April 15, 2019 [2 favorites]

I misread aerial furball dogfight as aerial turdball dogfight.

I will never not love Truman and all of the other mefi pups and cats. I just realized that my dog, Binky, has his 12th adoptaversy with me this week. He's such a good dog. He's slowed down some in the last year but he's 14 and it's not a concerning kind of slowing down just age stuff. I will try to get new pics of him this week for next week's thread.

Notre Dame being on fire is currently really frying my brain.
posted by fluffy battle kitten at 11:51 AM on April 15, 2019 [7 favorites]

I feel so sad, I've never had the opportunity to visit Paris and this was on my list of things to see, as I imagine for so many others. I have always enjoyed reading Victor Hugo's novel and this feels like such a punch to the gut, that we lost this history and this beauty.

posted by Fizz at 12:06 PM on April 15, 2019 [5 favorites]

The crowd outside the cathedral have been mostly silent and crying. Now they've started singing. [via: CNN]

posted by Fizz at 12:30 PM on April 15, 2019 [1 favorite]

I should probably crowdsource my new future username from y'all
posted by hugbucket at 12:34 PM on April 15, 2019 [1 favorite]

I didn't realize how hard this would hit me, seeing the spire collapse. It's like one of the pyramids burning. Are we going to have an FPP?

I had had a good morning. I was able to find a comparatively quiet point on the Marathon route and take pictures of the frontrunners, women's and men's, as they passed less than a foot from me. That had meant a lot to me, even though I don't really watch the sport. Now all the cheering (which I will be hearing until about sunset) seems so hollow.
posted by Countess Elena at 12:35 PM on April 15, 2019 [1 favorite]

Are we going to have an FPP?

There was one but it was deleted. I think after we have a bit more information. It was deemed too much of a "breaking news" type of post. I hope we do have one soon, but in the meantime this thread exists.
posted by Fizz at 12:37 PM on April 15, 2019

The cause of the fire will turn out to be negligence: best practices not followed for solvent storage, or an electrical fire due to neglect, or whatever. And now this ancient, delicate structure is crashing down. It is such a sign of the times.
posted by qxntpqbbbqxl at 12:43 PM on April 15, 2019 [2 favorites]

And they've just begun investigations, I'd rather have one after they've figured out the extent of the damage and the causes, than just "its burning"
posted by hugbucket at 12:43 PM on April 15, 2019

There have been three deleted posts on the Notre Dame fire so far. In the third theora55 notes that she's submitted a MeTa about this.
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 12:45 PM on April 15, 2019 [1 favorite]

One nice thing that happened this week is that I came up with the perfect metaphor for how my current anxiety levels feel, physically; I found myself saying to a friend "It's like I'm a skin suit stuffed with brillo pads," and yeah, that's exactly it. (It was also nice to meet up with some good folks in Portland on Saturday, in between bouts of driving around, scoping out neighborhoods and apartment complexes, and getting totally lost--thanks to y'all for putting up with my wibblings!)

Really, for someone with anxiety, the decision to launch a major life change by simply kicking away all existing supports before new ones are even sighted, let alone in place, is sort of idiotic. My last day at my job is in two weeks, and I have no new employment lined up, though I'm going to talk to some temp agencies. I'm struggling to get workers lined up to do the final projects needed so I can put the house on the market, but people keep flaking out/not returning calls/giving estimates that are double what I anticipated, etc. I mean, ultimately I have confidence that things will work out OK, for some value of OK, and at least I'm getting away from things in my current situation that have been making me crazy. Which, upon reflection, was the point of the whole endeavor, and whatever happens I will land somewhere different . A good thing to keep reminding myself at 3 am after 3 am.
posted by Kat Allison at 12:46 PM on April 15, 2019 [7 favorites]

And oh, god, hadn't seen the Notre Dame news before hitting "Post." Heartbreaking.
posted by Kat Allison at 12:50 PM on April 15, 2019

I'm mentally preparing for a many years delayed two week trip back across the country to go home and visit the aging family on the occasion of my nephew's graduation from high school. I pretty much stopped my yearly visits when the nephews and niece hit the teen years and stopped being little munchkin hellions running around making a racket and moved into that awkward teenage phase and even they (as I) didn't care much more for the big family gathering madness anymore. But now the time has come when they are approaching leaving the nest and the rest of the actual elders reach the now or never again.

Wish me luck in the next couple of months as I mentally prepare for the two week 'vacation' that's likely to be a bit traumatic.
posted by zengargoyle at 5:29 PM on April 15, 2019 [4 favorites]

Ow. Apparently I have muscles in places. They are making themselves known this morning after last night's initial gym session.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 3:14 AM on April 16, 2019 [6 favorites]

I just want to brag about my doctor and care team because they're awesome.

I sent them an overdue update message detailing the above med related issues about depression and stuff and my RN called me back in like 5 minutes just checking to make sure I was generally ok and stable and all that. Which I totally am, I definitely know how to keep slogging through depression, especially when it's basically a known and expected quantity with an exit plan to upgrade medications.

Anyway, hopefully I'll have injectables at my routine check up and check in on Friday! I've been working towards this and jumping through insurance hoops for almost 4 months!
posted by loquacious at 9:29 AM on April 16, 2019 [3 favorites]

I spent the weekend at the New England Folk Festival. It's volunteer-run - extemely well run - and is an oasis of music, dance, singing, peace, love, and tie-dye. I'm very tired, but so much excellent dancing and music, friends, and the annual Beatles sing-along make me happy. I've had a cold for well over a week, quite annoying because it's beautiful out and I want to garden, but my body is sore and tired.

I thought I had done 2015 taxes. I hadn't. Knew I had to do 2016, 2017, and especially 2018, or risk losing my health care subsidy. I paid 100% for (crappy)health insurance last year. With a fair bit of effort and, to be honest, tears, I did 4 years' of taxes last week, and will get 90% of my health insurance cost from last year refunded, plus general refunds from most of the last 3 years. Might get the refund from 2015. Now I can get a used Prius to camp in. This is very cheery.

My phone died of water damage. Between that and the festival, I was mostly offline for the weekend, and that was kind of healthy, except for no GPS, which I have come to rely on. Nobody sells maps anymore. I hate choosing a new phone.

The news from Paris is that Notre Dame is not completely destroyed. It isn't certain it can be restored; fire damage can be difficult to assess, and there have been structural issues for years. Seeing the spire fall was horrifying. But more was saved than initially expected, and that's hopeful.
posted by theora55 at 10:04 AM on April 16, 2019 [3 favorites]

I was just thinking about that 10,000 steps a day, idea. For those who have to write 15,000 words; could you combine walking and composing with a microphone? Just a thought. I can't even walk and chew gum, obviously.
posted by Oyéah at 11:35 AM on April 16, 2019 [1 favorite]

I just had an idea - I'm going to market a "10,000 Chews" self-help program! I'm sure Wrigley's would happily jump at a tie-in opportunity.
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:02 PM on April 16, 2019 [1 favorite]

I don't know that I would chews that...Speaking a word per each 10,000 steps would sound strident, like a 40's radio news broadcast, out of Germany. You'd need some tuba music, drums maybe.
posted by Oyéah at 4:29 PM on April 16, 2019 [1 favorite]

Drums, or maybe bagpipes or concertinas. It's hard to blow a horn and chew gum at the same time - and it's a sure-fire way to end up with a gum-clogged mouthpiece.

Oom-pah, oom-pah, oom-pfflortch DAMMIT.
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:43 PM on April 16, 2019 [1 favorite]

Oh crap. A few weeks ago I lost my wallet in Starbucks. I was on my home from Portland. I guess we were about 10 minutes away from the Starbucks when I realized that I must have dropped in in the Starbucks restroom, so we turned around and zoomed back to the store. I checked the restroom but it wasn't there, so I asked the baristas. They looked in their found box and nope.

My friend was more bummed than I was. She couldn't believe that a Starbucks customer would steal someone's wallet. I found this a bit amusing, and even somewhat uplifting. Anyhow, we stopped at the next town and I got a temporary drivers' license issued, and immediately called my banks to stop my debit and credit cards. The next day I went about getting a new military ID, VA, and social security cards. I also called three credit agencies to freeze my credit for 90 days. I guess many of you know the drill.

I have since gone through the New Password Tango with every site that has my password. Trolls and Phishers from far and wide are stealing my stuff: from Russia to Ukraine, from South Africa to Bakersfield....fucking Bakersfield--I mean, really.

So my accounts have begun to settle down, although I have no hope of ever getting my Steam account untangled, so I guess I just have to give up SIM4. Then, last week, I get a call from a guy in the DMV office in Eugene, telling me that they got my wallet in the mail. Wow. Golly. He reads a note to me: "I found your wallet. I hope you didn't have to get all new cards, I know what a pain that is." Then, in a different hand, "By the way, I borrowed the fifty dollars, I'll get it back to you as soon as I can." I am debating how long I shall hold my breath waiting for the cash.

So, the guy at the DMV mailed me the wallet, and it had all my (now useless) cards, the note, sans the cash.
posted by mule98J at 5:20 PM on April 16, 2019 [8 favorites]

I went to a low-key open mic at my neighborhood watering hole and was recruited to dance with a parasol in front of the stage during a brand new friend's quasi-absurdist performance art. Despite being entirely sober for this, I had a lot of fun.
posted by duffell at 7:55 PM on April 16, 2019 [3 favorites]

I am so late to the MetaTalktail but jeez it's been one of those....time periods. I had a work project that I'd agreed on based on the client's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad word count and budgeted about 14 hours worth of time for over Thurs/Fri/Sat, which wound up being somehow approximately 3x larger than than anticipated so I jettisoned as much as I needed to still reasonably complete the project and still had a 20 hour commitment rather than 14 hours...AND THEN I made a terrible, horrible, no good very bad file save mistake that lost me another 10 hours worth of work and it was just all a long slog until Sunday noon. Then it Monday was tax day/talk daughter down off ledge of abandoning study abroad application process because her anxiety wasn't letting her talk to program coordinators to get straight answers about course offerings...and to boot I finally filed my taxes on time for the first time in a long time and I was so proud of myself...only to have my e-files rejected too late to actually mail paper returns for theoretically mismatch of PIN based on last year's AGI, even though use the same tax prep software and that's exactly what it says from last year. Then, tonight I drove in my big truck to the 45-minute distant Home Depot to pick up a large item, and my flaky bad key that usually takes a few minutes of jiggling the steering wheel to unlock decided to completely flake out as I was getting ready to head home and I was in an utter panic that I would not be able to get this truck started. I have a good copy of the key that I loaned out to my flaky ex-tenants who occasionally borrowed my truck to run truck errands, and they "forgot" to return the copy when they finally moved out last week (a week past when they had agreed to move out) and it was just a giant how the fuck am I going to get home from Home Depot if I can't get my truck started sort of evening. After 20 minutes of jiggling and failing I finally went in to the service desk and asked them to bring out the load to the parking lot and at least get it onto to truck. The guys who helped load my truck then proceeded to try to get it started as well, but after they tried and failed, I was finally able to get it to turn. So, disaster averted but good lord will I be glad when the hippy-dippy still-owe-me-back-rent glad-you're-at-peace-with-the-universe-but-maybe-make-peace-with-your-landlord ex-tenants are out of my hair for good.

Also, my mom is declining in health/cognition, I'm helping out my local sister from afar by doing as much as I can to stay on top of her finances, but apparently this means that my mom insists that my sister call me every time a payment needs to be made to someone to make sure there's enough money in the right account. Which my sister is very much on top of as well, but now mom's convinced that because I swooped in last month to help straighten out some financial messes that had accumulated, that I need to be consulted about every financial thing.'s just funny because now I'm getting these calls from my sister saying "mom wanted me to check with you to see whether she should pay X bill out of account A or account B" and I'm like "use account A, it's got plenty of funds in it" and she's like "I know" and I'm like "i know you know" and if you could wink over the phone we would...The upside is that we get to close out these calls by mutually telling each other we're the best. Which she is, and I try to be.

Oh, wait. Is this not the fuckity-fuck thread?
posted by drlith at 8:11 PM on April 16, 2019 [8 favorites]

WOOOOOOOO!!!! Medication upgrade unlocked! Picking up new script in a couple of hours!

Thanks, Obama!
posted by loquacious at 11:25 AM on April 17, 2019 [4 favorites]

I just changed my name and it is now gender neutral and it makes me so happy. I've been waiting a bit because the info on how to do it is somewhat limited and does not include the very important piece which is that you can only do it same day if you bring the ~$200 in cash. If you pay any other way, you can have a court date in a month. Which turned out to be spring break for my daughter and an actual planned vacation, so I asked for the week after. But not the Monday when I watch my niece or Tuesday when I volunteer. So it felt like a pile of delays but it's finally here.

I was also nervous because I had changed my last name when I was a kid and no one mentioned whether the that can affect it. The judge didn't even mention it. He just had me affirm that the stuff on the form was true and sent me of with certified copies. So now I can change the rest of things. ^_^
posted by Margalo Epps at 11:48 AM on April 17, 2019 [8 favorites]

I am going on a first date tonight. I have not been on any kind of real date in four years (I have not been a nun by any means, but dating per se, not so much) and I haven't kissed anyone new in three years almost exactly and I like this man, thankfully we have known each other peripherally for a while and we have mutual friends. We are going to see some bands play. I am trying to both not doubt myself and not doubt him (with the emphasis on the former).

He's cute, people. And he writes well. And he called my cat precious.
posted by wellred at 5:27 AM on April 18, 2019 [10 favorites]

I just got confirmation for my presentation slot at a conference next month. It's my first time ever speaking at a professional event. Now I have around three weeks to come up with a bunch of PowerPoint slides and things to say. Eep.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 7:02 AM on April 18, 2019 [4 favorites]

Mr. Bad Example, I spend half my day in PPT. If you don't read text off your slides the whole time you're already winning, IMHO!
posted by wellred at 7:08 AM on April 18, 2019 [3 favorites]

Best recipe for kale crisps.

Have Elon Musk design and execute a rocket large enough to contain all the kale on Earth. Send it to The Sun. Somewhere just past Mercury it ought to be just right...
posted by Oyéah at 5:03 PM on April 18, 2019

Update: squee?!?!
posted by wellred at 12:07 AM on April 19, 2019 [5 favorites]

No worries. There's a special level of Hell reserved for people who just stand there and read the slides at you.

It is right next to the level reserved for people who have their entire presentation typed up on a bunch of single-spaced pages and proceed to read the entire thing to you verbatim.

My style is to just get a nice detailed outline with all the points I want to hit and then talk based off that. As a bonus, it lets me use my theatre degree.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 2:03 AM on April 19, 2019 [2 favorites]

Update: I had my second gym session today. I managed to do roughly twice as much as I did last time, and still haven't overexerted myself. I'm going to keep gently pushing it.

And it's probably psychosomatic, since I know I really shouldn't be able to see a difference after only two hours or so, gut feels a bit smaller. I feel like I've got a little more energy. I'm carrying myself just a fraction more upright. The background chorus of self-loathing in my head has actually shut the fuck up for a little while, which I wasn't going to mention, but it's such a nice side effect I thought I should.

Now I just need to make a habit of the whole thing.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 10:12 AM on April 20, 2019 [4 favorites]

I need to hear more about wellred's date!
posted by HotToddy at 1:29 PM on April 20, 2019 [1 favorite]

∆ same.
posted by Fig at 2:12 PM on April 20, 2019

Heeeeeeyyyy well, we went to see a couple of bands and they were glorious. Date is friends with the second one and whoa, were they ever amazing. I met Date through music stuff. So far that is an awesome thing.

This is of course public so I won't go into it too much but Date ended up having a bit of a health emergency on the way home and I was very calm and saw Date through it and everything turned out OK, we had a good talk about vulnerability, and I am seeing Date again in a few hours. And I am blushing a lot right now.
posted by wellred at 2:45 PM on April 21, 2019 [9 favorites]


yup, this is gonna be fun
posted by wellred at 5:02 AM on April 22, 2019 [1 favorite]

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