People shouldn't snipe in the Kaycee Nicole obit thread. May 17, 2001 8:26 AM   Subscribe

I'd like to see a squelch button so that rudeness like this and this/this don't have to be viewd by everyone.

And for those of you who snipe in basically amounted to someone's wake... I hope you're embarrased enough that you never come back to MeFi. What kind of community can we be when two people can't even keep their mouths shut when we're basically holding a funeral?
posted by SpecialK to Feature Requests at 8:26 AM (17 comments total)

SpecialK, I thought that according to your earlier post you had e-mailed aaron. But then you came back with this and now this thread (when you had said that you would leave it at e-mail). Why is it necessary to belabor the point?

I know that you are upset, and I truly understand, but I don't think that the answer is to have a squelch button, or place a personal vendetta on MetaTalk.
posted by Avogadro at 8:56 AM on May 17, 2001

sometimes while i'm enjoying some good wine and beautiful scenery/company a fly or a gnat will get a little to close to my eyelashes causing a momentary blink-urge.

so i'll blink or wave them away and not really think about it.

i can deal with an occasional gnat-post here at MeFi, the scenery is worth it.
posted by th3ph17 at 9:34 AM on May 17, 2001

I can't believe you find Aaron's comment rude. He said "Um" and linked to the original text. He pointed out a factual error.

You think they were rude, and that's fine. People have differences of opinion, and I don't think there's any point in us continuing to disagree on whether or not he was rude.

You've already made your complaint against Aaron and justnobody elsewhere on MetaTalk, requesting a squelch button doesn't require you to continue your crusade against Aaron.

I for one hope Aaron continues to come to MetaFilter, which he likely will. I feel he contributes a great deal to the site, I'm sorry that you don't see that.

As for squelch buttons, I don't particularily care either way. When someone bothers me I find it reasonably easy to just say "Oh, it's that annoying person again, prooving what an ignoramous s/he is."

posted by cCranium at 9:44 AM on May 17, 2001

Squelch buttons are landmines, they amount to others having the power to censor voices (and that's my job, right Joe Clark?).

I'd consider doing personal ban lists where each user can set a list of people they never want to see, and their posts are hidden, or a link away or something.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 10:49 AM on May 17, 2001

Most of the time I deal with posts I don't like by taking them with 1.2x1018 atoms of salt. Of course, sometimes I forget my salt, but then it's usually my fault that I've freaked out, and not somebody else's.

Matt: a link away sounds good, for just those instances when we (for some odd reason) need our ire raised. But then that's probably the more complicated solution. It is nice to see who's in a thread, though, just because the denizens of a thread determine its flavor (or flavour, in some cases).
posted by iceberg273 at 10:54 AM on May 17, 2001

There's no personal vendetta. It takes a lot more than this to make me angry. I'm using his post as an example and nothing more... this is not persecution.

I am, however, worried about how it makes us look as a community to have sniping and unnecessary corrections in a thread about someone's death, that we know her family is reading. It's yet another worm in the MeFi apple, as far as I'm concerned.
posted by SpecialK at 11:54 AM on May 17, 2001

And cCranium, it WASN'T a factual error. I quoted Kaycee's words and the words of the song that she quoted, not just the words of the song. The words of the song were quoted in italics, which should mean they're part of a separate quote.
posted by SpecialK at 11:56 AM on May 17, 2001

well, in real life, we are a community that includes snipers. and people with bad spelling, who probably dress funny, smell bad [that's me], use nasty language, and sometimes just like to piss people off for the hell of it. our emotions are different and at times like these, we learn that we don't all grieve the same [or even grieve at all, perhaps]. You can't open your wake to the public and then be sad that the public shows up.

The joy of it all, for me, is that I pick many of the other communities that I belong to, and can tailor the participation of myself and others to a certain degree. Here, you just need to -- within reason -- take it as it comes which may mean putting up with hurt feelings, offense, bruised egos, and the knowledge that just because we all have access to computers and some typing skill, we can be very very different. I see hints of my anarchist utopia in MeFi and just wanted to spaz about it briefly.

Stanley Fish has some good thoughts about the concept of free speech in some less than free situations which seems to be sort of what we have here.
posted by jessamyn at 12:28 PM on May 17, 2001 [1 favorite]

I'd personally like to see only those posts and members that I agree with. Eventually I'd whittle the list down so I'd only see my own posts.
SpecialK, have you considered that, perhaps, an anonymous public free-for-all might not actually be the most appropriate place to have a wake? Especially if you're going to be so sensitive about people not taking it as seriously as you do?
We'd all like to live in a place where people don't act like assfaces, but they do. Censoring people because of it will just make MeFi worse.
posted by Doug at 2:54 PM on May 17, 2001

True, Doug. I guess I did take the post about Kaycee rather seriously, and it insulted me that comments that weren't in the spirit of what everyone else was saying made their way into the discussion.
Censorship would be a bad thing in some areas, so I suppose there isn't a way to take just the good, and not have to be a witness to the bad.
posted by SpecialK at 4:17 PM on May 17, 2001

Heh. Some areas? Typo.
posted by SpecialK at 4:18 PM on May 17, 2001

I'd definitely like to apologize for the PS: at the end of my post. The post from Justnobody came in as I was previewing my post, and that sooooo pissed me off. Everybody else just ignored the little trolls looking for attention, and I wish I had done the same.

All in all, I understand that Debbie is touched by the outpouring on the web, and that's *all* that counts.

As far as the "block the bozo" button (a topic as old as MeFi itself)... I think Matt's doing a great job banning the truly irritating. We all get obnoxious here sometimes, and I can't see anyone getting blocked over one goofy post.
posted by EricBrooksDotCom at 7:10 PM on May 18, 2001

I don't like the idea of "personal ban lists." How do you have a conversation if some of the participants are only hearing certain other participants (who they happen to agree with)?

Many threads would suddenly make zero sense if you stripped out aaron's posts. (just as an example)

I support the judiciously applied "blink reflex."
posted by y6y6y6 at 8:12 PM on May 18, 2001

Perhaps it is time to lighten up a little.

People cannot expect to live in a 100% safe society all of the time and be exposed to nothing offensive (if you want that, try a socialist paradise).

Even if that girl's family are reading, they cannot expect to read 100% positive comments. They must accept that some people are going to criticise the treatment of the topic at hand.

This is a public forum, and you cannot expect people to toe a line of conformity just because a girl has died. While my best wishes are with her and her family, I do not consider it right to blame others for their negative opinions. They can say what they want.
posted by wackybrit at 5:40 PM on May 19, 2001

People cannot expect to live in a 100% safe society all of the time and be exposed to nothing offensive (if you want that, try a socialist paradise).

If you ever do find a socialist paradise, drop me a line ;-)
posted by Hjorth at 11:50 AM on May 20, 2001

I thought that was MeFi!
posted by kindall at 1:10 AM on May 21, 2001

And cCranium, it WASN'T a factual error.

I can't help but comment on how amusing I find this statement to be now.
posted by cCranium at 1:39 PM on May 22, 2001

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