Movin' on up...

February 1, 2009 8:50 PM

Preparations are in order for the big move.

So we're in the process of moving to some new bigger servers and they have new IPs, so we'll have to move the domain over. In the past, we've always just put up the "mefi is down/having a massage" page on the old server and waited for DNS updates to take place. While that usually means a couple hours of no site for most, some people report not reaching the new server for up to a week.

This time around, we're going to try something slightly different and instead of taking down the old site on the old server, we'll be switching it to read-only status. That means you'll be able to read the front page, threads, archives, etc, but you won't be able to add anything during the transition. It's our hope that this will only mean a couple hours of downtime as DNS updates usually take, but during that downtime the site can at least be somewhat useful to everyone.

We're tentatively scheduling the big move for sometime on Tuesday, likely in the early afternoon, and if all goes well, the new servers should be in place and running by that night. We'll post the IP address and host header hack instructions for those that don't want to wait when the move takes place as well.

Just wanted to give everyone a heads up if they pop onto the site in a couple days and notice something different for a few hours.

posted by mathowie to Uptime at 8:50 PM (156 comments total)

Break a leg
posted by Argyle at 8:54 PM on February 1, 2009

Hope all goes well. And a good time to just thank you for Mefi, generally.
posted by WCityMike at 8:59 PM on February 1, 2009

Now we up in the big leagues, gettin' our turn at bat.
posted by ColdChef at 9:01 PM on February 1, 2009 [3 favorites]

Who gets to pack the breakables?
posted by amyms at 9:04 PM on February 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

/circles new server drowsily; prepares for nap
posted by cowbellemoo at 9:17 PM on February 1, 2009

Remember to shorten your DNS timeouts. If you set them to a low value, like ten minutes or so, that's how quickly everyone will move over, once you throw the switch.

Anyone who doesn't switch over that quickly is using a misconfigured DNS server, which isn't something you can help very much.

Remember that you have to drop the timeout well before the transition. If your existing timeout is, say, a day, then you need to drop the timeout to ten minutes at least a day in advance. I like to do it at 2x the timeout value or earlier.

DNS traffic is very lightweight and no big deal, so some extra queries for a day or two won't hurt your provider any. 72 times nearly nothing is still a very small value. :)
posted by Malor at 9:17 PM on February 1, 2009 [9 favorites]

I'll show up late with some beer, after 95% of everything's been packed.
posted by not_on_display at 9:18 PM on February 1, 2009 [11 favorites]

Doing something new? Check.
Something untested? Check.
Nothing can possibly go wrong? Check.

I feel a deep sense of dread over this.
posted by Kattullus at 9:19 PM on February 1, 2009

I assume we gave 30 days notice so we'd get our deposit back.
posted by cashman at 9:20 PM on February 1, 2009

"We're tentatively scheduling the big move for sometime on Tuesday, likely in the early afternoon, and if all goes well, the new servers should be in place and running by that night."

Any chance we could reschedule next week? I'm going to be far from electricity and internet access for the week so the site wide average pain would be reduced by that 1/80Kth.
posted by Mitheral at 9:30 PM on February 1, 2009

As long as we live, it's you and me baby
There ain't nothin wrong with that.

Best theme song ever? Indeed!
posted by Divine_Wino at 9:31 PM on February 1, 2009

I just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 9:36 PM on February 1, 2009 [19 favorites]

Doing something new? Check.

The only thing new is the actual hardware. Same software end to end, same code.

Something untested? Check.

We've been using the same setup on Fuelly for six months without incident, so it's been tested.

Nothing can possibly go wrong? Check.

Something will go wrong, always does, but I don't think it'll be dreadful. We've moved servers about ten times now and after the first one or two, they've been pretty smooth ever since.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 9:46 PM on February 1, 2009

+1 what Malor said about dropping TTL real low. Do it now.

Load balancers are really good for this kind of thing. Assuming you don't have one handy, like a Citrix Netscaler, might your ISP configure you in somewhere (if they have one)?

Do you have a script for game day? Have you planned for contigency at every step, particularly the really vulnerable ones disallowing quick backout or data loss?
posted by ezekieldas at 9:49 PM on February 1, 2009

Mostly I think the plan was to shotgun a beer and then see how fast we can run from the old server to the new ones.
posted by cortex (staff) at 9:58 PM on February 1, 2009 [21 favorites]

We should have standbys on red alert level 1, just in case the round robins are swamped and the primary and subsystem caches get hosed. Be ready for TTL crash on primary blinkenlight #6. And may the Force be with you.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 10:00 PM on February 1, 2009 [5 favorites]

This won't affect us print edition subscribers I hope?
posted by Abiezer at 10:02 PM on February 1, 2009 [10 favorites]

in the spirit of using obscure movie quotes as snark...

You see, this a moral test of oneself, whether or not you can maintain loyalty. Because being loyal is very important. So, you're gonna go out there, you're gonna say good night, I had a very lovely evening. Walk out the door, get in the car. Go home. Jerk off. And that's all you gonna do.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 10:04 PM on February 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

How will I know if I've been left behind?
posted by dead cousin ted at 10:07 PM on February 1, 2009 [4 favorites]

*crosses fingers*
posted by rtha at 10:14 PM on February 1, 2009

How will I know if I've been left behind?

Because everyone else will be floating up in the air, throwing snark down upon you. The Snark of the Just.
posted by msalt at 10:15 PM on February 1, 2009 [6 favorites]

Also, one of my cats just puked on my carpet. I view this as a bad omen. Sorry.
posted by dead cousin ted at 10:17 PM on February 1, 2009

Best of luck. See you on the flip side.
posted by schyler523 at 10:20 PM on February 1, 2009

Ah, sorry, I'd love to help, really, but I hurt my back on the weekend. I know, what are the odds, right?
posted by turgid dahlia at 10:22 PM on February 1, 2009

Break a leg log.
posted by UbuRoivas at 10:22 PM on February 1, 2009 [2 favorites]

Oh but don't forget to back up your web bookmarks! People always forget their web bookmarks.
posted by turgid dahlia at 10:23 PM on February 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

Good luck. Thanks for all the work on this.
posted by salvia at 10:25 PM on February 1, 2009

I'm not sure Pulp Fiction qualifies as "obscure".
posted by cortex (staff) at 10:29 PM on February 1, 2009 [4 favorites]

How will I know if I've been left behind?

It'll be Christmas morning, and you'll wake up in an enormous empty house. You'll be free to try out all of the various cosmetics and hair products. You will try aftershave for the first time. You will be scared by a bearded neighbour who you eventually find to be kind, protective, with a sad life story. Finally, you will entrap, severely beat, ridicule, and torture two burglars.
posted by Fiasco da Gama at 10:31 PM on February 1, 2009 [15 favorites]

*chews nails*
posted by Space Kitty at 10:31 PM on February 1, 2009

Just in case something really crappy happens, bye everybody! Y'all are good people. See you on the other side. :)
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 10:32 PM on February 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

Anyone else remember when the Metafilter server lived in delfuego's closet? Anyone still got those pictures of that?

*cue shimmery screenwipe*
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 10:32 PM on February 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

It seems like just yesterday status.metafilter.com was three days of outages followed by matt posting "sorry I unplugged a server getting a Hawaiian shirt outta the closet; my bad"

Now we got plans and there's programmers and mods and contingencies and there's no closet and nothin' overheats. I dunno. I dunno.
posted by boo_radley at 10:35 PM on February 1, 2009 [3 favorites]

Pulp...what?!??
posted by UbuRoivas at 10:35 PM on February 1, 2009

STAVROS
posted by boo_radley at 10:35 PM on February 1, 2009

This is kinda like how I'm thinking of getting a new slice, except that someone might actually notice.
posted by 31d1 at 10:41 PM on February 1, 2009

Any chance of getting temp aliases of the new ones, like new.ask.metafilter.com, for the duration of the switchover?
posted by Pronoiac at 10:45 PM on February 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

And when we all wake up, we'll be on Rakhat, and all our loved ones back on earth will be 60 years older while we remain unchanged. I know how this one turns out. :(
posted by taz at 10:52 PM on February 1, 2009 [4 favorites]

In theory, you could just add the new server's IP address a bit in advance, and have both IP addresses in DNS by the time the changeover comes. Remove the old one once the changeover is complete. This was an accepted way to do migrations and failovers and the like in the olden days but I don't know how well yer average web client (*cough*MSIE) would handle it.
posted by hattifattener at 11:38 PM on February 1, 2009

You'll wander the land feeling more and more lonely, then you'll collect a bunch of mannequins and set them up out on the yard and pretend you are President of the World. Just before you go completely insane from the isolation you will meet a woman who was also left behind. Things will start to seem good, until an aggressive Maori man shows up, creating a love triangle.
posted by Meatbomb at 11:46 PM on February 1, 2009 [2 favorites]

Blatantly obvious names for the newer servers during the DNS switch: blue, green, & gray/grey.metafilter.com.
posted by Pronoiac at 12:22 AM on February 2, 2009

Meanwhile, the moderators discuss a backup plan in the case of catastrophic failure.
posted by Fiasco da Gama at 12:47 AM on February 2, 2009

Tuesday afternoon, what time zone? PST?

(Basically, I'm just wondering whether the downtime will result in my increased productivity at work or a good night's sleep.)

*throws styrofoam packing peanuts around in an unhelpful manner*
posted by the latin mouse at 1:13 AM on February 2, 2009

Ummmm...this might be a good time to...hey can somebody point me back to that time we were talking about how to back up one's user history???
posted by allkindsoftime at 1:17 AM on February 2, 2009

"Hello. Tech Support; may I help you?"

"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with MetaFilter."

"What sort of trouble?"
"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"
"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
"Nothing."

"Nothing?"
"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in MetaFilter, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?"
posted by netbros at 1:24 AM on February 2, 2009 [2 favorites]

MetaFilter (got you) down? Get cheap snark at half the price! Be prepared! Send money now!*

* Blinkenlights not included.
posted by bjrn at 1:56 AM on February 2, 2009

mathowie's moving 'ZIG' for great justice?
posted by orthogonality at 2:12 AM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

I'm going to go crazy not being able to comment. I don't have friends, I have Metafilter!
(mostly joking.)
posted by dunkadunc at 2:54 AM on February 2, 2009

Meatbomb, you forgot the cross dressing.
posted by johnofjack at 3:17 AM on February 2, 2009

Do we have to give everybody the new address?
posted by gman at 3:54 AM on February 2, 2009

What new address?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 4:03 AM on February 2, 2009

Ixnay on the ressadnay.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:05 AM on February 2, 2009

You did buy servers with the internet on them, RIGHT? Because this would be a HUGE oversight. Not every computer ships with the internet, even today.

Oh, and PIXPLZ for us hardware junkies.
posted by Devils Rancher at 4:12 AM on February 2, 2009

We're moving Dad? Am I going to have to make all new friends again? I hate your job.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 4:13 AM on February 2, 2009

Not every computer ships with the internet, even today.

So not an issue. Everyone has one of those AOL CDs lying around.
posted by gman at 4:14 AM on February 2, 2009 [2 favorites]

Movin' on up...

I wonder if I'll finally get a piece of the pie?
posted by gman at 4:18 AM on February 2, 2009

but during that downtime the site can at least be somewhat useful to everyone.

Lawks. On first skim I read that as "downtime for the site can be somewhat useful to everyone".

I'm not an addict.

I can give up any time
posted by freya_lamb at 4:19 AM on February 2, 2009 [2 favorites]

I just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.
posted by flatluigi at 4:41 AM on February 2, 2009 [4 favorites]

What new address?!
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:05 AM on February 2, 2009

I'd just like to say how thrilled I am to read the word 'lawks' again. I think it's the funniest word ever!

Oh, and good luck with the server thingy move thing.
posted by h00py at 5:05 AM on February 2, 2009

IP Freely!
posted by lukemeister at 5:10 AM on February 2, 2009

This reminds me of the time as a young network engineering intern (a career I promptly ditched after the job I mention here) I was dumped into the server room of a major hospital. I had just gotten my biometrics scanned for access and received my Halon training so that I wouldn't suffocate in the case of a small fire, and then walked around the room (about the size of a smallish Target store. My supervisor pulled up a few floor tiles to the interstitial area revealing the cable plant beneath - thousands and thousands of square feet of cables of every size, shape, and material. He said, "pull out everything that you can't trace back to something that works, but go talk to Ron first [the operations manager] so that he can show you what the critical patient systems are. If you accidentally pull those someone will die."

Good luck Metafilter.



.....Rumor had it that my boss didn't last much longer at that job than I did.
posted by mrmojoflying at 5:12 AM on February 2, 2009 [6 favorites]

Goddamnit, I hate helping people move. The last person I helped move claimed to have all their stuff packed and ready to go.

What actually happened? I was walking over there and a bird shit on my shoulder.

True story.
posted by purephase at 5:16 AM on February 2, 2009 [2 favorites]

Those of you with an astral connection to MetaFilter can rest assured that the site's Platonic Form servers will remain True, Perfect, and Changeless. No need to adjust your settings.
posted by Meatbomb at 5:26 AM on February 2, 2009 [5 favorites]

Set up the old webserver to proxy forward requests to the new webserver IP while the DNS is propagating? No? That's how I always do it. Zero downtime, baby.
posted by chrismear at 5:26 AM on February 2, 2009

For faster response times on the new server, just type 'rm -rf'. No need to thank me.
posted by Pastabagel at 6:03 AM on February 2, 2009

Dude, I'm "working" from home on Tuesday. Push it back, I beg of you. What am I supposed to do, spend quality time with my son?
posted by middleclasstool at 6:09 AM on February 2, 2009

did the malicious code from the 'drive-by' whack the old server hardware out of balance (in that case: wow. how does that work?) or did you need better hardware anyway and this just happens to be an opportune moment?

no accusations meant. I just find this interesting.
posted by krautland at 6:12 AM on February 2, 2009

did the malicious code from the 'drive-by' whack the old server hardware out of balance

My understanding as Most Clueless Mod is that there's a teeny bit more overhead to each of the SQL queries now that they're all properly santized which is a little rough on the server. Moving to a new server is a good idea anyhow and actually saves some money (I know, crazy right) so it winds up being a good idea for all sorts of reasons.

Add to that that Tuesday looks like a day when none of us are on vacation or sick, and here we all are.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 6:25 AM on February 2, 2009

You schedule sick time in advance? Wow.
posted by yhbc at 6:30 AM on February 2, 2009

You schedule sick time in advance? Wow.

The economy's hard on everyone these days. And everyone knows that MeFi is the Wal-Mart of community weblogs. Anti-union bastards.
posted by middleclasstool at 6:32 AM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

Yeah, the attack didn't do anything bad to the old hardware. It's just that old hardware is oooold, and it turns out that doing things Right (as far as sanitizing input) is sufficiently more demanding when applied across the board that what used to be enough power is now not really quite enough power.

The being-paid-to-upgrade thing is just a happy accident; I think once we started seeing poor performance with no obvious optimization fix, we were going to move to new hardware regardless.
posted by cortex (staff) at 6:43 AM on February 2, 2009

krautland; apparently it's like when you go to the cell phone store to get a battery charger and you learn that you've been paying $49.95 for 300 minutes for about a year and a half and you see that now the lowest plan they have is $29.95 for 7000 minutes. There was better hardware available at a lower price than what they're paying now.
posted by odinsdream at 6:45 AM on February 2, 2009

Also, I second Malor on adjusting TTLS now. You're currently at 12 hours, if I'm reading dig output correctly. Adjust that down to 10 minutes right now and the whole process will go a lot smoother.

Just remember to adjust it back to 12 hours (or whatever large value) after the move is complete.
posted by odinsdream at 6:49 AM on February 2, 2009

I'm scared, hold me.
posted by The Whelk at 6:50 AM on February 2, 2009 [2 favorites]

No matter what happens, just be sure the phone is ON the hook when you turn the new servers on.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 7:06 AM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

you've been paying $49.95 for 300 minutes for about a year and a half and you see that now the lowest plan they have is $29.95 for 7000 minutes.

how come there still isn't a modern equivalent to blueboxing or stolen cable? seriously, someone save me from those texting charges.
posted by krautland at 7:13 AM on February 2, 2009

In a just world, this would qualify for money from the government's stimulus package.
posted by chinston at 7:15 AM on February 2, 2009

For the umpteenth time, it's about the way the contracting process has been set up to preclude the local workforce from even the chance of applying for the work.

they're doing a shit job at communicating that, as I've said previously as well. 'british jobs for british workers' says something else.
posted by krautland at 7:15 AM on February 2, 2009 [3 favorites]

Wut?
posted by Science! at 7:17 AM on February 2, 2009

wtf? I totally posted that last comment of mine in a different thread?!
posted by krautland at 7:17 AM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

IT'S HAPPENING!
posted by Science! at 7:18 AM on February 2, 2009

seriously, someone save me from those texting charges.

The equivalent is to call them and say "I am considering terminating my service because of the cost of text messaging. What can you offer me?" This is why I have 1000 free text messages per line per month.
posted by odinsdream at 7:18 AM on February 2, 2009

buh?
posted by chinston at 7:21 AM on February 2, 2009

Where is that comment -I believe it must have been from Matt in MetaTalk- that outlines the server history of Metafilter? I remember it mentions Kaycee and perhaps the closet and/or New York... but I can't find it using any of those search terms?
posted by yeti at 7:31 AM on February 2, 2009

Metafilter: the plan was to shotgun a beer and then see how fast we can run from the old server to the new ones.

did I do it right?
posted by ArgentCorvid at 7:41 AM on February 2, 2009

I'm scared, hold me.

Note: The Whelk needs a hug.
posted by Devils Rancher at 7:47 AM on February 2, 2009

You know I would love to help you move, you know that. But my wife made these plans for Tuesday, and if I don't go to this thing with her, it will be a whole thing…

Anyway, good luck, can't wait to see the new place.
posted by paisley henosis at 7:47 AM on February 2, 2009

I just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.
posted by ALongDecember at 7:56 AM on February 2, 2009 [5 favorites]

My wife and I are going to the bank to finalize the loan for the new house on Tuesday, otherwise we'd totally come over.

Anyone else waiting for

pb/Han: Watch this. (flips switch, server makes whirring, weezing noise, then nothing)

jessamyn/Leia: Watch what?

pb/Han: I think we're in trouble.
posted by Ghidorah at 7:58 AM on February 2, 2009

Stavros, thanks for making me spend the last 40 minutes trying to dig up all the server pictures... :/

• When the MeFi server was shipped to my place in NYC
• When I finally moved it into a closet, and off of the floor of my bedroom
• When I moved to Boston and built a custom shelving unit for it (and all my other servers)

Now, if someone could get on that Anil character to re-post his animated GIF of the server reconfiguration in NYC...
posted by delfuego at 8:14 AM on February 2, 2009 [7 favorites]

Will this move help us get the search feature back?
posted by caddis at 8:16 AM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

Look, don't get me wrong; I'm hugely grateful for the hard work everyone does behind the scenes to keep this place running smoothly, but another downtime? If we keep this up, my boss is going to think I developed some kind of crazy new work ethic because of how high my productivity has been lately.

I can't have that. I've spent years training them in how little they can actually expect of me.
posted by quin at 8:21 AM on February 2, 2009 [9 favorites]

delfuego: I hope you eventually got that glitch in your closet space-time fixed.
posted by odinsdream at 8:24 AM on February 2, 2009

What quin said, and how. All this downtime is going to get more work piled on me, or worse, I'll end up promoted.
posted by jerseygirl at 8:28 AM on February 2, 2009

I assume we gave 30 days notice so we'd get our deposit back.

Not after the condition we're leaving the place in.
posted by gman at 8:34 AM on February 2, 2009

Will this move help us get the search feature back?

Yeah, it will.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 8:35 AM on February 2, 2009 [3 favorites]

But it's such a good excuse for posting doubles.
posted by gman at 8:38 AM on February 2, 2009

Whatever you do, don't cross the streams.
posted by Joe Beese at 8:42 AM on February 2, 2009

• When I moved to Boston and built a custom shelving unit for it (and all my other servers)

I don't see a sandwich machine.
posted by Devils Rancher at 8:42 AM on February 2, 2009

• When I moved to Boston and built a custom shelving unit for it (and all my other servers)

My god, it's bending space and time!
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:47 AM on February 2, 2009

Holy crap, delfuego, reading your bio just made me feel *very* inadequate. Thanks :)
posted by sevenyearlurk at 8:51 AM on February 2, 2009

Have you contacted the Computer History Museum? I'm sure they'd want to put your old server on display. Men, women, and children will flock from around the world to be photographed with it.
posted by lukemeister at 8:55 AM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

The closet set-up made me shed a tear of nostalgia for a simpler time, when most site servers were housed under dorm bunks and in dry shower stalls.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 9:04 AM on February 2, 2009 [2 favorites]

The closet set-up made me shed a tear of nostalgia for a simpler time, when most site servers were housed under dorm bunks and in dry shower stalls.

So THAT'S what I always did wrong.
posted by inigo2 at 9:13 AM on February 2, 2009 [4 favorites]

allkindsoftime: Ummmm...this might be a good time to...hey can somebody point me back to that time we were talking about how to back up one's user history???

Export Your Comments. It's probably not working right now.

Related threads: feature debut, what does "your weekly export will be counted" mean.
posted by Pronoiac at 9:14 AM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

Comment Export is working.
posted by pb (staff) at 9:16 AM on February 2, 2009

Hear me! The Thorn Valley Plan is the aspiration of idiots and dreamers!
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 9:28 AM on February 2, 2009

Where's the Van?!
posted by pianomover at 9:29 AM on February 2, 2009

Whoops, yeah, Export Comments was fixed early in the previous thread.

Tracking down the most recent thread took long enough that my focus shifted to just compiling the list of previous mentions.
posted by Pronoiac at 9:52 AM on February 2, 2009

Export Comments works and it's awesome and tool remarkably little time even for someone as verbose as me.
Highly recommended, would export again, A++++++++++++++++
posted by misha at 10:11 AM on February 2, 2009

Ack! took. Not tool.
posted by misha at 10:12 AM on February 2, 2009

I have a question. If fish don't fry in the kitchen, then where do they fry?
posted by exogenous at 10:18 AM on February 2, 2009

If fish don't fry in the kitchen, then where do they fry?

I don't know. But at least we won't have to worry about burning our plates of beans on the grill anymore.
posted by amyms at 10:21 AM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

Where's the Van?!
posted by pianomover

Eponysterical.
posted by backseatpilot at 10:28 AM on February 2, 2009

So is Metafilter like the post office? Tuesday's the slow day?
posted by graventy at 10:28 AM on February 2, 2009

And everyone knows that MeFi is the Wal-Mart of community weblogs.

Dear mathowie sahib,

I believe you have a very beautiful community on the World Wide Web pipes.

As you must now know, here in Mumbai, we have a very well skilled and trained workforce in the IT department, and their mastery of the English languagehat is second to none!

What you may NOT know though, is that many of your closest competitors in the Internetworking Community Webblog business is making ENORMOUS SAVINGS on their salary outgoings. Webblogs like Little Green Footballers, Boingo Boingo, Daily Kod and the Huffington Puffington are all paying a FRACTION of their previous wages bills by outsourcing their moderation function to a country where the overheads are much, much lower.

Now, we know that in Webblog communities, putting valued members of staff onto the scrap-heap for life can sometimes be a sensitive business. Fortunately for you, all of our staff are Driving the Cluetrain. We love our Clay Smirky over here and the Indian Cluetrain carries many, many passengers. Some are even sleeping in luggage compartments. All of them are armed with Cluebats and CluebyFours in order to deal with any malcontents or untouchables that gain access to this fine community by trickery or other nefarious means. Some of our moderators are ex-military, and they're very handy when it comes to applying the cluebamboo to the poster's feet, should circumstances dictate.

Times are hard everywhere at the moment, and reducing your salary bills and increasing productivity is key to continuing profitability and possibly survival. As our moderators each work a 12 hour shift, seven days a week, we could cut your salary bill immediately, at a stroke.

But wait, there's more!

Rather than paying the overly generous minimum wage tarriff that those wicked, lazy American moderators get, the hourly rate with Mods R Us (Mumbai) is just four rupees an hour, of which the agency takes a modest three quarters, while our hard-working fluent English speaking staff get paid a very generous one rupee an hour!

In addition, all of our staff have had at least ten years of electrocution lessons -- something that differentiates us from those stupid, lazy savages who work at Dell's call centre.

If you want to discuss this further -- and I can't see why you wouldn't -- please contact our senior account manager, Mr Harry Rama for more information.

Yours very, very, faithfully,

Ms. Mandi Ghandi,
Chief Executive
Mods R Us (Mumbai)
posted by PeterMcDermott at 10:34 AM on February 2, 2009 [11 favorites]

Way to stay classy, there.
posted by Pants! at 10:57 AM on February 2, 2009

I'M NOT PACKED!
posted by Astro Zombie at 11:04 AM on February 2, 2009

Have you contacted the Computer History Museum? I'm sure they'd want to put your old server on display. Men, women, and children will flock from around the world to be photographed with it.

Remember how when V'ger came back, it was encased in that huge alien ship? When the Singularity arrives, the MetaFilter server will be sort of like that.
posted by Meatbomb at 11:09 AM on February 2, 2009 [2 favorites]

• When I moved to Boston and built a custom shelving unit for it (and all my other servers)

So that's where all my Ikea shelving went.
posted by jmd82 at 11:53 AM on February 2, 2009

My world has just become a more precarious and shadowy place. Aren't we supposed to pick a safe place away from the building where we can all regroup? I mean, just in case.
posted by madamjujujive at 12:09 PM on February 2, 2009

Fuck it, I am going to go buy some new shoes. Might as well go out in style.
posted by madamjujujive at 12:10 PM on February 2, 2009

If we have to regroup, I'll suggest BBQ. The question: "Oh, hey, Mefi's down. What now?"

And this isn't the time for new shoes. Keep to some comfortable, broken-in shoes, so walking lots won't be painful.
posted by Pronoiac at 12:18 PM on February 2, 2009

Sonuvabicth. I knew there was a reason I got 10 voicemail messages from cortex this weekend asking if I owned a truck.
posted by eyeballkid at 12:33 PM on February 2, 2009

My world has just become a more precarious and shadowy place. Aren't we supposed to pick a safe place away from the building where we can all regroup? I mean, just in case.

We should also have a safe word. Mine has always been "Owthatfuckinghurts!"
posted by Devils Rancher at 1:02 PM on February 2, 2009 [3 favorites]

We should also have a safe word. Mine has always been "Owthatfuckinghurts!"

You really should choose something else. I mean, once you've got the Gimp-style zipper-mask on, your voice can be muffled.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 1:49 PM on February 2, 2009

Can I have the old hardware once you finish the move? I mean, if you're just gonna throw it out...
posted by inigo2 at 2:07 PM on February 2, 2009

Awesome. This is going to be just like The Rats of NIMH!
posted by electroboy at 2:08 PM on February 2, 2009

You know what I would love to do. I want to post a big assholish comment on MeTa RIGHT before the move starts. That way, all you bastards would just kill yourselves knowing you can't write some smarmy comment about it. It'll just stay there ALL DAY LONG with "0 comments". That would be awesome.
posted by hal_c_on at 2:11 PM on February 2, 2009

There goes your secret plan.
posted by jerseygirl at 2:17 PM on February 2, 2009

I want to post a big assholish comment on MeTa RIGHT before the move starts.

Trust me, that won't work out as well as you envision it might.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 2:19 PM on February 2, 2009

So wait, is there any kind of contingency plan in case of OH NOES NO MEFI tomorrow night? Because that would be very very traumatic.
posted by CunningLinguist at 2:25 PM on February 2, 2009

That way, all you bastards would just kill yourselves knowing you can't write some smarmy comment about it.

Alright, ALRLIGHT, someone will pay attention to you now.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:36 PM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

So wait, is there any kind of contingency plan in case of OH NOES NO MEFI tomorrow night? Because that would be very very traumatic.

My contingency plan is a Guinness.
posted by odinsdream at 2:54 PM on February 2, 2009

Will there be liveblogging of the move at politicalfilter?
posted by ~ at 2:58 PM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

I moved the TTL down to 20min (my dns hosts' minimum) so the DNS change should be pretty quick, and we're going to allow posting from both the old web server and the new one when all is said and done.

The only downtime looks like it'll be doing a full blown backup on the database (could take 1-2 hrs), then transfering it over and bringing the new db server online (maybe 1hr). Once the database server data is in place, both web servers will be live and we'll initiate the DNS change.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 3:09 PM on February 2, 2009

Can we has IP?
posted by zengargoyle at 3:47 PM on February 2, 2009

We'll post the IP when we're ready for traffic at the new server.
posted by pb (staff) at 3:48 PM on February 2, 2009

LurkFilter!

*does the new server dance*
posted by defenestration at 3:54 PM on February 2, 2009

My contingency plan is IRC.

If you come there, I promise to post more Mr. Bungle and IOSYS videos. We can shout at each other with impunity, argue about Deep Space 9, use "lol" without shame, and so much more. It'll be so much fun you'll think it's 1993 all over again.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 3:57 PM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

Awesome. This is going to be just like The Rats of NIMH!

We've got to get the site to the lee side of the server!
posted by Ghidorah at 4:10 PM on February 2, 2009

My contingency plan is, as always, to eat all the ice cream.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 4:16 PM on February 2, 2009 [6 favorites]

Will there be liveblogging of the move at politicalfilter?

Are jessamyn and cortex still in talks to form a coalition party?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 4:27 PM on February 2, 2009

Have you considered replicating the database so that the second server has a live copy?
posted by team lowkey at 4:35 PM on February 2, 2009

My contingency plan A is to drink three beers and sing 'Born to Run' at karaoke tomorrow night. Plan B is the same, but with four beers.
posted by Kwine at 5:05 PM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

"Are jessamyn and cortex still in talks to form a coalition party?"
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 10:27 AM on February 3

Yes, this is true. My sources claim they plan on calling it Modafilter.
posted by Effigy2000 at 5:38 PM on February 2, 2009

FWIW, I've found several server moves greatly speeded up by hitting the open dns cache check after the move. There's a fair number of folks using it (even unawares), especially after the recent DNS vulnerabilities this summer.
posted by jenkinsEar at 5:54 PM on February 2, 2009

Well it looks just the same as the old place.
posted by Mister_A at 6:13 PM on February 2, 2009

bigger server ? does this mean the return of the img tag ?
posted by sgt.serenity at 6:57 PM on February 2, 2009

Moving's a pain. Best of luck.
posted by carter at 7:16 PM on February 2, 2009

Will I dream?
posted by lysdexic at 8:08 PM on February 2, 2009 [1 favorite]

*opens door*

I just want to tell you both "Good Luck". We're all counting on you.

*closes door*
posted by pjern at 8:42 PM on February 2, 2009

Back once again!
posted by Abiezer at 11:13 PM on February 2, 2009

Man, that was faster and smoother than I thought.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 11:23 PM on February 2, 2009

I'd say let's move this party to the new thread here.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 11:24 PM on February 2, 2009