Klang went Boom!

March 9, 2010 8:03 AM

Where in the world is klangklangston? Suddenly, after Friday, March 5, no posts from the normally prolix irascible yet lovable curmudgeon. I have breaking news...

Or, broken news. klangklangston, better known to me as Josh, my son, took a fall off his bicycle riding home late Friday night. LA infrastructure being what it is, the sidewalk ate his tire, he went overboard. The broken news is this--a fractured proximal femur and a compound fracture of the elbow, both on the left side. Contusions, scrapes, etc. He's in pretty rough shape.

He's had 3+ hours of surgery to repair the hip with a dynamic compression screw , and today (maybe even right at this moment) he's getting a plate & screw assembly in his elbow. The time prediction is 4 hours surgery/recovery on that one.

In a near ultimate irony, the leftist we all love is at the Ronald Wilson Reagan UCLA Medical Center. Of course, the kicker there is that he is among California's 5 million working uninsured[pdf].

As I said, I'm his dad, and I live 2000 miles away in Michigan. His gf Amy is putting out Herculean efforts to keep up with helping Josh heal and in navigating the health care quagmire. The estimates so far are $50K for just the hospital. No idea what the surgeons' charges will be. And then there's the minibar!

The bottom line is this: If you are in the LA Area and feel like you can help with even little things like a call or a visit or helping Amy keep sane with some non-Hospital time, your help will be greatly appreciated. If you already have his contact info, great. If not, MeMail me and you shall receive.

He is facing a long, yet active, recovery. he has to be up & walking on his "new" leg daily, and I'm pretty sure he will need help with that too. I'm sending him a laptop so that he can more easily keep up with MeFi (his home away from home) once he's out of the hospital--Thursday, we hope.

If your distance is greater or if you just want to send a card, a letter, a good thought, MeMail me and I'll provide the details. That goes, too, if you just want to know what the Rake's Progress is--memail, and I'll email/memail in response.

posted by beelzbubba to MetaFilter-Related at 8:03 AM (364 comments total)

Oh my goodness. So sorry to hear that! Best wishes to Josh for a speedy recovery :/
posted by fiercecupcake at 8:10 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh boy that must've hurt. I really appreciate the update, and I hope he's back on his feet soon. I hope he gets that laptop soon so I can send him sarcastic greetings personally, but in the meantime I'll drop you a note.
posted by Mister_A at 8:10 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Just so you know, there's WiFi service in RRUCLA and accessible via laptop should he start having any delirium tremens or other withdrawal symptoms. Best wishes for a speedy recovery...
posted by drpynchon at 8:11 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh, dear. Get well soon, Klang!
posted by Faint of Butt at 8:12 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh, man! What a sucky thing to happen. I've had a bad elbow injury kind of like that, but nothing like this double whammy.

Please send him my best wishes. If I may be of any assistance in providing elbow rehab tips, I am ready and waiting.

And my best wishes also go out to you and his many friends and family members as well; this must be hard, but I'm sure you'll see some great responses. Yay internet!
posted by Madamina at 8:13 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Thank you very, very much for the update. You are the way dads ought to be.
posted by everichon at 8:13 AM on March 9, 2010 [16 favorites]

So sorry to hear about the accident. Sending lots of web-hugs klangklangston's way.

::hugs::

::more hugs::
posted by brina at 8:14 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Terrible news. What can we do about the costs?
posted by adamdschneider at 8:19 AM on March 9, 2010 [6 favorites]

Hope he gets well soon.
posted by fixedgear at 8:20 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

This was the best post about bad news I've ever seen. I was by turns horrified and laughing. (I did not hurl.)
posted by DU at 8:21 AM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

oh my goodness - thank you for the update and feel better as soon as possible klangklangston! I can tell your dad has a good heart and an even better sense of humor from this post title :-)
posted by pinky at 8:21 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Is there a paypal account we can use to help offset some of the expenses? Generosity is the one thing MeFites possess more of than snark.
posted by bondcliff at 8:22 AM on March 9, 2010 [10 favorites]

Can klang apply for MediCal coverage to help offset the damages? $50k (and rising) is a pretty insane number. Getting MediCal for my dad basically saved his life and is paying for long term physical therapy and care.
posted by mathowie (staff) at 8:23 AM on March 9, 2010 [12 favorites]

YIKES! So sorry and thanks for the update. We'll make sure MeFi stays extra entertaining (40% more awesomeness + 20% fewer flameouts!) in the weeks to come!
posted by iamkimiam at 8:24 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Poor klangklang :( I wish him a fast recovery and many ANTM marathons to occupy his time.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 8:25 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

ACK! Get well soon Klangers!
posted by The Whelk at 8:26 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Rough, does that screw come off? Or is he stuck with it?
posted by Max Power at 8:27 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Having to pay $50k at a place named for Reagan because you have no insurance is not irony, it's an honorific.
posted by shakespeherian at 8:28 AM on March 9, 2010 [40 favorites]

Why does this shit always happen to the dudes that aren't total dicks?
posted by The Straightener at 8:28 AM on March 9, 2010 [4 favorites]

Sorry about the fall. I hope he's up and about soon. And what a considerate dad you are!
posted by Pastabagel at 8:28 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh no! Sending my best wishes!

I'm on the other side of the world, so I can't help directly. Please do tell us if there is any possibility for financial assistance.
posted by The Toad at 8:30 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well soon, klangklangston! Make them give you cranberry juice and ginger ale when you get out of surgery -- it is one of the few pleasant memories I have of being in hospitals.
posted by theredpen at 8:31 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Ouch!

And here I'd been thinking I'd go for a bike ride at lunch...maybe I'll just sit and read Mefi and eat candy until it's time to go back to work.

Hope everything heals up soon, including the bill.
posted by dilettante at 8:33 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Nthing that I'd like to help out financially if we can find a way. And get hale again soonest, klangklangston.
posted by bearwife at 8:33 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Ouch. Best wishes to klangklangston for a speedy recovery, to Amy for some hard-earned rest, and to you beelzbubba for peace of mind... being far away from your kid when he's hurt can't be easy, no matter how old he is. Hugs to everyone from here in VA.
posted by headnsouth at 8:36 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

You know, there's a reason nobody walks (or rides a bike) in LA...

All my best wishes to klang-- it will be a tough road, but we all know he has a lot of fight in him.
posted by InfidelZombie at 8:36 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well soon klangklangston, glad you aren't dead like I was getting from the above the fold.
posted by Mitheral at 8:36 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

That sucks, but thanks for the update. Hopefully klang will make a speedy recovery. Also, having plates and screws isn't that bad, I just like to think of it as being part robot.
posted by burnmp3s at 8:37 AM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

I just hope he doesn't end up with a metal mask and a burning hatred of super-science, annoucing to all that when the time comes, Klangklangston shall encompass your DOOM.


in times of trial my brain goes to the Justice League
posted by The Whelk at 8:37 AM on March 9, 2010 [8 favorites]

I'm really sorry to hear about this. Big klangfan over here. My very best wishes for a speedy recovery.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 8:42 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Ouch... $50k for falling off your bike. I've got to wonder what hurts more. Count me in if donations are being collected.

Hope the surgery and recovery goes well, etc.
posted by tapeguy at 8:45 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

For those of you who don't already know, Klang and I have known each other for nigh on 20+ years. For one of my birthdays (I think my 11th!) Josh had the good sense to buy me a the Pixies album Doolittle. I listened to it once and then tucked it away for a couple of years (because it wasn't hard enough for me - I was slogging through an industrial/thrash metal phase, so I was pretty much only listening to Slayer and Skinny Puppy). When I was about 14, I dragged it back out and listened to it one more time, planning on selling it at the used record store, and subsequently had my fucking mind split.

Suffice it to say, he's a little bit ahead of his time.

I hope you're ok, Josh. I'm 3k miles away, but if there's anything I can do, let me know.

Anybody interested in trying to organize some kind of benefit to pay for his impending med. bills?
posted by orville sash at 8:48 AM on March 9, 2010 [6 favorites]

Nthing the idea of setting up a fund to help El Klang. I'd definitely contribute.

Feel better, dude. We need you 'round these parts.
posted by shiu mai baby at 8:49 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well sooner than normal Klang. Miss your contributions.
posted by josher71 at 8:49 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Thanks for the update. An unlucky accident, but it sounds like klangklangston is a pretty lucky guy to have such support.

Please tell Josh we miss him!
posted by anotherpanacea at 8:50 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

klangklangston's dad has a lower user number than klang! Now that's mentorship. Best wishes to klangand and his inner screw.
posted by Rumple at 8:54 AM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

Generosity is the one thing MeFites possess more of than snark.

Amazing, innit? One of the things I love about this place.

I to would give, if giving needs doing.
posted by rtha at 8:54 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Yikes! I can so relate: I ride a bike and have the same sort of insurance coverage.

...Big klangfan over here. My very best wishes for a speedy recovery.

Ditto -- he has my very best wishes as well.

Man, even the sidewalks are dangerous.... *shudders*
posted by y2karl at 8:55 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Ah geez! Thanks for the update.

Klang, please heal swiftly and get rid of that damned unicycle.
posted by EatTheWeak at 8:55 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

My thoughts are with Josh and Amy, and I'm definitely on team deliver-decent-food-and-movies-and-books-and-drive-around-as-needed.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 9:00 AM on March 9, 2010 [5 favorites]

Klang was the first person to give me a load of crap for saying something utterly stupid on Metafilter. I hope he recovers quickly, and survives the physical therapy and bills with as little pain as possible.

There is no shame in medical bankruptcy, which is what I'd have to be doing if I had a $50K hospital bill. Holy crap that sucks almost worse than the injury.
posted by BrotherCaine at 9:04 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh, lousy news for klang, one of my very favoritest MeFite voices evar. (Yet so well told; we see where he gets his intelligence, wit, and compositional flair!)

I'm not in LA but would love to send a get-well. I'll MeMail you.
posted by Miko at 9:04 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

...as being part robot.

I believe Robo-American is the preferred term, you insensitive git.
posted by Mister_A at 9:12 AM on March 9, 2010 [6 favorites]

We learned about this here in LA when Klang didn't make it to the Westside meetup. There's already been some talk of some sort of fundraiser, probably in the form of a meetup or something. Thin Lizzy and I are happy to lead the charge on that front. Please let us know when a Paypal or whatever is set up.
posted by Bookhouse at 9:20 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I like the idea that there are whole families in the mefi fold. Thanks for the info beelzbubb. Feel better klang!
posted by quin at 9:24 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I believe Robo-American is the preferred term, you insensitive git.

Also, 'git'? Wanking-American, please, you insufferable lout.
posted by shakespeherian at 9:25 AM on March 9, 2010 [6 favorites]

There's already been some talk of some sort of fundraiser

How about a charity bicycle ride?
posted by backseatpilot at 9:26 AM on March 9, 2010 [7 favorites]

Ummm... dumb-ass varlet?
posted by Mister_A at 9:29 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

$50k? Seriously? You know, we could you a few curmudgeons here in Canada, and the healthcare is free. Consider this an official invitation to emigrate.
posted by blue_beetle at 9:33 AM on March 9, 2010 [4 favorites]

USE, not "you"
posted by blue_beetle at 9:34 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

*Hustles Klang over the border*
posted by Mister_A at 9:41 AM on March 9, 2010 [5 favorites]

Best wishes for a speedy recovery Klang. I am using my super telekinetic powers to persuade Congress to retroactively pass universal healthcare so you will have been covered at the time of your calamity.
posted by toodleydoodley at 9:44 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm tearing up reading all of these responses--thanks everyone. I didn't want to turn the FPP into a charity-whine, and, too, I want to talk to Josh to make sure he's ok with with a paypal type fund, but I'm sure he'll need it since we haven't even heard what the surgeons will cost. I'll be talking to him (i hope) tomorrow--the time difference is a killer right now--if it's a go, I will email anyone who would be so kind & generous to send a few shekels his way--my email is jjsteich at gmail.

The hospital social worker is supposed to be helping them navigate all of the MediCal or other available disability funds. Cali is kinda broke right now, so they say, so we're not holding out a lot of hope.

A few miscellaneous comments--my user number is lower 'cuz he lurked for some time before getting me hooked on the Blue, then I paid for his signup in return.

His grandmother was part bionic--knees, hip, shoulder, wrist--so he's carrying on the line (and remember, Robo-Cop was from Detroit).

I bought that Pixies album for Orville Sash's b-day party. At 12, klang was aghast but carried out my evil wishes. 'twas I that ruined your musical sensibilities, Andrew.

I'm gonna step out of the thread now, but will step back in if I have paypal/fund info in the next couple of days--I'm well aware that most of my mefi responses elicit tl;dr so I'll go now.
posted by beelzbubba at 9:45 AM on March 9, 2010 [17 favorites]

Aw man, that sucks. Poor Klang.
posted by Forktine at 9:46 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Yikes! Get well soon, klang!
posted by brundlefly at 9:47 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

So sorry to hear the news. Thank you so much for letting us know. Updates would be great!

You might want to call the legal aid society and see if you can get the LA Department of Public Works to pick up the tab for the medical bill if it happened on city property. After all, it was a dangerous sidewalk that caused the accident, right? If it was in front of a home, that person's homeowners policy might be on the hook - I know we've been told that we have to repair and maintain the sidewalk in front of our house, cause we'd be responsible for injury due to negligence. Can you get over there and take a picture of the crack or ridge or whatever it was that snared him?
posted by jasper411 at 9:55 AM on March 9, 2010 [13 favorites]

I have no words.
posted by absalom at 9:58 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Jesus creeping shit, that's horrible. $50K before the surgeries? Fuck, man, they should toss in an extra college degree.

Get better, Klang.
posted by Skot at 10:05 AM on March 9, 2010 [3 favorites]

I'm not organize-y, but I'm paying-for-Klang-y, so could some organizey person start a paypal type thing?
posted by everichon at 10:08 AM on March 9, 2010 [4 favorites]

Wow, yikes! Come on back, Klang!
posted by Pollomacho at 10:09 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

You might want to call the legal aid society and see if you can get the LA Department of Public Works to pick up the tab for the medical bill if it happened on city property. After all, it was a dangerous sidewalk that caused the accident, right?

Juries hate cyclists and the like, but they hate city government worse, more often than not. I'd explore all legal options that make sense.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 10:13 AM on March 9, 2010 [5 favorites]

Mend quickly, Klang!
posted by Iridic at 10:15 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Wow. This sucks. Get better soon, Klang!
posted by ambrosia at 10:17 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Crappy news, but great dad. Heal quickly, Klang!
posted by CaptApollo at 10:18 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

At least he survived!
posted by grobstein at 10:24 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

40% more awesomeness + 20% fewer flameouts

Those numbers don't add up AT ALL.
posted by John Kenneth Fisher at 10:32 AM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

Miss you klang, hurry back (well, not hurry hurry; place your feet carefully please).
posted by jamaro at 10:33 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Just one more voucher: While I met Klang on MeFi, I met Beelz elsewhere about 15 years ago and have liked him ever since. These are good people. My best wishes to Josh.
posted by cribcage at 10:33 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Miss you klang, sorry you're all beat up! Get well soon!
posted by agregoli at 10:34 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well soon Klang. FWIW I look forward to joining your bionic army.
posted by Tesseractive at 10:37 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh that sounds plain miserable ... Wishing for a speedy recovery!
posted by gomichild at 10:46 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Ach - poor Klang! OMG, Holyrood! You're going to need lots of this
{{{{{{{holyrood}}}}}}} as my son went through the same thing (broke leg playing softball, 2 surgeries, lots of screws and a plate installed was the fix and he needed a lot of help with rehab, which his beloved fiancee was on hand to provide, thank the dear Jeebus). beezlbubba! What an awesome dad you are. Good luck to all of you. Let us know how things progress and if a paypal account should magically appear for klang, I'm in for a few $$.
posted by Lynsey at 10:46 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I will absolutely support any paypal fundraising that goes on. And, I know a real pitbull personal injury attorney who practices in California if that is the direction you want to go in (I have very mixed feelings about going that route--it is a hugely invasive process, but 50K++ sheesh!)

I think we need to vote that every member of Congress has to pay out of pocket for their own individual health care policy. No more gold-plated, Cadillac group plans for them. We'll see how fast they pass Universal Health then.
posted by agatha_magatha at 10:51 AM on March 9, 2010 [4 favorites]

tch, that's nothing. C'mon, Mary, walk it off!

(just kidding - let's just say I both sympathize and empathize - and this nihilistic atheist hopes you have the best possible recovery, and the city pays for both your medical costs and your pain and suffering and takes the offending street out back and puts two in its head Old Yeller style)

If the Klang-Kapital is successful (I'll be tithing once my dole check comes in), would people be interested in expanding it to a MetaBenevolent Society, with maybe a few gatekeepers to keep the u.n. owenses out?
posted by jtron at 10:54 AM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

Yikes! I can so relate: I ride a bike and have the same sort of insurance coverage.

For the love of christ-- look, this is terrible news, but every reasonably middle class person who bikes in urban areas needs to budget for catastrophic insurance. This is the third story like this I've heard in as many months (freelancer or uninsured professional under the age of 30 gets hit by car or falls off bike, didn't bother with a low-premium high-deductible plan to prevent financial disaster in exactly this scenerio, ends up 5-digits in the hole).

At the very least, you might be able to get legal assistance to negotiate the bills down so that you're paying what Medicare reimburses, as opposed to full sticker price. Best of luck, in all sincerity.
posted by availablelight at 10:54 AM on March 9, 2010 [6 favorites]

Tell him people on different continents are even hoping for a speedy recovery!
posted by DreamerFi at 10:55 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Also: a supportive and active partner, I would imagine, leads to optimal outcomes in cases like this. If you're reading this, Klang's Amy, HOORAY FOR YOU
posted by jtron at 10:55 AM on March 9, 2010 [3 favorites]

I've always enjoyed klang's contributions and I'm sorry to hear he's dealing with this.

I'm also in for a few $$$ if we do some sort of paypal or other fund drive. When my dad was having cancer treatment, my whole home town turned out for a fund drive to help with the costs. I'd like to return the favor to the universe.
posted by dchrssyr at 10:56 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Klang, I wish you as speedy a surgery and as pain-free and quick a recovery as possible. Get up and moving as soon as the doctor says it's okay — muscle atrophy takes time to come back from.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 11:05 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

That's awful news, really hope his recovery is speedy.
posted by Elmore at 11:08 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Terrible. But thank you for updating us on what's going on. Get better soon, klang!
posted by Solon and Thanks at 11:09 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Count me in too. Dude is freaking awesome. Sorry about the accident and wishing for a speedy recovery!
posted by cashman at 11:11 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I work a few blocks from the hospital, and am happy to help in any way I can. Very sorry to hear about the accident, and I hope klang makes a speedy recovery.
posted by mogget at 11:18 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm sorry to hear about this all the way around. Klang, I hope you're feeling spry and kicky again real soon.

And man oh man, it sounds like you won the dad lottery. That's pretty damn sweet!
posted by heyho at 11:19 AM on March 9, 2010 [3 favorites]

Count me in as well! That sucks!

At this point I'm tracking so many people recovering from bike-related trauma that I'm thinking about starting a friggin' social networking site for all of 'em.
posted by bhance at 11:22 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

My best to all involved....
posted by HuronBob at 11:22 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Hoping klang gets better very shortly. And hat tip to klang's dad for, among many many things, the clever onomatopoeic wordplay of the title.
posted by WCityMike at 11:24 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Best. Dad. Ever.

I'm in for sending some $$$ too, the idea of $50k is just... gah. How do people do it? But good luck & get well soon klang! You fuse those bones! I injured my knee pretty severely in 2005 and effectively had to learn to walk again. It's hard at first but completely possible - my severe limp has all but disappeared.
posted by saturnine at 11:28 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Wow, that's terrible. Best wishes, klang, from a fellow bike rider.
posted by invitapriore at 11:29 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well soon klang, you strange occasionally annoying but quite fun person you.

I would happily sign up for any fund.
posted by Artw at 11:30 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

This sucks, Klang.

bhance: At this point I'm tracking so many people recovering from bike-related trauma that I'm thinking about starting a friggin' social networking site for all of 'em.

Add me to the ranks of the recently bike-related injured.
posted by Pronoiac at 11:31 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

IANAD but I advise you to get well soon.
posted by Sailormom at 11:38 AM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

I'm thinking about starting a friggin' social networking site for all of 'em.

This wouldn't be a bad idea. We can share advice on how to handle the aftermath.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 11:38 AM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

Count me in once the Paypal's set up.

Get better soon, Klang.
posted by palmcorder_yajna at 11:42 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh, man, the news of this accident is awful, but at least it comes with the good news of the immanent recovery. Please convey my best wishes to Josh!
posted by OmieWise at 11:52 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I don't have any money or health insurance but i will happily donate curmudgeonly rock criticism in kind.

gl bruv
posted by Potomac Avenue at 11:55 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

This wouldn't be a bad idea. We can share advice on how to handle the aftermath.

Yeah, that's kind of the general gist of some emails I have exchanged with some folks at this point (esp. since insurance/resource/healthcare navigation can vary so wildly depending on the state etc. it would be nice to document those specifics)

Would also be nice to bundle up some resources for the family, bundle up some for the injured, and put together a couple of how-to's (fundraising, travel, bankruptcy, rehab) etc.
posted by bhance at 11:59 AM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

So sorry to hear about this. I actually have wondered where klangklangston was during at least one thread in the past few days. Thank goodness he wasn't injured even more seriously, and hopefully he'll recover fast. Also, if you started a fund I too would contribute what I could. Best wishes!
posted by two or three cars parked under the stars at 12:02 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm beginning to wonder how the pain of having a giant screw drilled into one's general ball-region compares to a lifetime of people saying, "You're alright I guess, but your dad's cool as shit, dude, is he busy tonight?!"

fuck off, klang will appreciate
posted by The Straightener at 12:10 PM on March 9, 2010 [3 favorites]

Damn, I hope he gets up and around better soon. Best wishes to you and yours.
posted by sleepy pete at 12:17 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

The best thing is that there'll be hours and hours and hours of unlimited MetaFilter time awaiting him during his convalescence.

Did I say "best?" Hmmm...
posted by jtron at 12:17 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

_{I don't think...anyone is...saying that.}

Good luck getting on your feet in all respects, klangklangston!
posted by Juicy Avenger at 12:20 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Wishing the best for him... I don't know him personally but we had a few e-mail exchanges and he's quite the gracious, friendly guy. The board's definitely not going to be the same until he's back on. I too will help chip in once the bill thing is sorted out.
posted by crapmatic at 12:25 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

(damn, maybe we need a Metafilter group policy or something)
posted by crapmatic at 12:25 PM on March 9, 2010 [11 favorites]

Best wishes for a speedy recovery, klangklangston!

If there's one thing we've learned here at Mefi, don't use Paypal for charitable endeavors!!! You risk them confiscating the money!
posted by IndigoRain at 12:27 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well soon!
posted by amyms at 12:29 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Yikes!

Get well soon, klang.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 12:33 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Hi yall broadcasting from klangs bedside. I jsut read the thread aloud and he is overwhlemed. Thank you for yoir good wishes and offers of help. We're not sure what kind of help we need yet ( thou i am investigating other cahrities, mediCal, or lawyering, or or disability or negotiation to keep the bill lower or paid). Me or Jay (beelzebubba) will keep you updated as to immediate needs. Local folks who want to help inperson, memail me your contact info.
Thanks for snarking it up real good. The first laugh we've had in days. A bike ride fundraiser indeed! U all rock.
posted by holyrood at 12:34 PM on March 9, 2010 [5 favorites]

MetaFilter: snarking it up real good.
posted by headnsouth at 12:38 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Angry mail, for angry Klang Klangston!
Best healing vibes sent via all channels physical electronical and psychical, for healing Klang Klangston!

FTFY
posted by not_on_display at 12:40 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh snap! Pun somewhat intended.

Transmitting good thoughts as I type.
posted by pyrex at 12:43 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

My own father gold-medaled in awful parenting, so it's really especially awesome to see the Gold-Medal winner in AMAZING parenting!

(My mom's pretty awesome, but all of the competition I've seen personally in the men's field has been sub-par.)

Best of luck, klangstons. I so wish I could afford to help monetarily, but my own medical expenses preclude my being able to do so, so I send empathy and *hugz.*
posted by grapefruitmoon at 12:44 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Best wishes for a swift recovery, klang.

Has anyone ever done a study on how the additional stress of medical debt affects the healing process? Because, you know, seriously.
posted by jokeefe at 12:51 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Aw, Klang, that sucks! I'm on the wrong end of the country to help directly, but healing vibes, plus whatever funds I can scare up, will be on their way.
posted by sarcasticah at 12:53 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I know I don't post too much in the Blue or the Grey, but I read both frequently, and I usually enjoy Klang's contributions. I know I don't know you, man, but, yeah, healing vibes, and if there's a charity hat passed around, I'll drop what I can in.
posted by Alterscape at 1:00 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Best wishes to klang and the family. Count me in if some paypal or benefit deal gets set up.
posted by marxchivist at 1:04 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I was up at UCLA this morning picking up a box with molds of my feet (yay, podiatry!) and figured Klang was getting more cyborg parts. Bummed me out that there wasn't anything I could stop and do, being late for work as it was.

Here's hoping the hospital's good about the financial end, and Klang heals up fast and well. Count me and Mr. F in for the great fundraising meetup.
posted by fairytale of los angeles at 1:16 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Holy mackerel, that sounds painful. I hope you recover swiftly, klangklangston.
posted by sculpin at 1:18 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

More wishes for a speedy recovery from this corner of the net. We miss you, klang!
posted by immlass at 1:18 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Jeez...I was about to break out the bicycle now that it's biking weather in these parts.

Get well soon. Tender internet hugs...

{{{{Klang and Holyrood}}}}
posted by schyler523 at 1:21 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Scary to hear this, but glad you're on the way to healing, klang. Most of the cost of hospitals goes to the fine, fine food, as I understand it - exclusive jello flavors, molecular gastronomic mashed potatoes and the like - so enjoy that while you can. Pretty soon you'll be back home.
posted by LobsterMitten at 1:22 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Putting out my offer to help organize fundraiser/non-evil paypal account type thing and dinner patrol. Memail me!
posted by Space Kitty at 1:26 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Ouchies! Get better quick, klang!
posted by deborah at 1:28 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I am sending good wishes in solidarity from another of America's uninsured!
posted by greekphilosophy at 1:46 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Aw, so sorry you have to go through this, klang. May your good health return at the speed of snark.

reading the description of what happened, I couldn't help remembering that Far Side "Smite" cartoon
posted by cybercoitus interruptus at 1:53 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh, that sucks so much. My deepest sympathies, klang. Hope to see you around soon, and that your recovery is fast and easy.
posted by Caduceus at 2:05 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh wow, get well soon!!
posted by Julnyes at 2:17 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm sorry about your accident, Klang, but rest assured you're among the very best people to sustain you during your recovery, as I know so well.
posted by pjern at 2:24 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Remarkably there is a post just yesterday on the blue about the insane costs of US health care. In that case a rather expensive insured death, which prompted this really great comment from mephron:

And if people don't care about that [the injustice of the US health care system], why should they care about people whose debts go up?

Put me in the group who cares about other peoples debts going up; I'm in as well.
posted by zenon at 2:25 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

ouch, poor bugger.
posted by turgid dahlia at 2:27 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Terrible news. Get yourself on the mend, young man.
posted by Abiezer at 2:38 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Yeah, get well soon, klang. One of this site's best posters, and as argumentative and prolixly* entertaining as I wish I could be.

Also: the idea that falling off a bike could end up costing (minimum) fifty grand is fucking terrifying.

*yes, I did just make that word up, but you know what I mean.
posted by Len at 2:43 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

That's awful news.

Klang's a great guy. We've chatted and corresponded electronically for a number of years now. Back in 2008 I was flying back to the US from Australia and was stuck with a 9 AM to 9 PM layover at LAX. I got in touch with klang beforehand and we arranged to meet after he was done at work. He advised me to go spend the day at Venice Beach (which I did and enjoyed) and then he and holyrood came and picked me up and took me to a delicious Mexican place and then to their neighborhood bar. Before driving me to LAX klang gave me a hilariously bad porn magazine (Spock sex!). All in all it was a really great day, which I hadn't really expected since a day later I had to go to divorce court so my mind wasn't exactly inclined towards happiness. He's a splendid fellow. I hope he gets better soon.
posted by Kattullus at 2:48 PM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

As the survivor of a similarly spectacular bicycle accident*, I sympathize and wish him a full and speedy recovery. We look forward to your return, klang!

*No surgery save lots of stitches after mine, mind you, but I was convinced to go to the hospital when an onlooker noted, "Mister, I can see your skull through your forehead."
posted by ricochet biscuit at 3:00 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Speedy recovery klang. And dad, you're awesome.
posted by netbros at 3:06 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Yes, here's to klang's speedy recovery. A fine fellow, and one of my closest "internet friends," if I can say that. Hope he does very well.
posted by koeselitz at 3:11 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

This is excellent news. Klang, my brother, I am very happy to hear that you didn't die. Golden Lucky Day, and from now forward life is going to always seem very sweet and special for you indeed.

Heal well and enjoy moving forward, my thoughts are with you.
posted by Meatbomb at 3:18 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Best of luck Klang, my thoughts go out to you.
posted by smoke at 3:19 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm so glad he's not more seriously injured. I really enjoy the hell out of his presence on Metafilter and he sounds like a really cool person. Glad he has an Amy and a dad to help him out.
posted by Neofelis at 3:20 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Wishing you a speedy recovery, Klang. I miss your contributions. When a fundraising thing is established, I'm in.
posted by Hobgoblin at 3:21 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

hope you feel better soon, klang! and thanks for the post, beelz, you are a swell dad.
posted by lia at 3:23 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well soon klanger, I'm certainly in for what my meager means allow me should that be needed. I'd express further anger at America's shitfuck healthcare setup, but I'd just be wasting electrons. When you're back on the mend email/memail me and I'll see if I can't send you a care package.
posted by Divine_Wino at 3:25 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Amy just emailed me and I'm gonna edit b/c she sent it via ipod touch& I know that as a librarian she is a much better speler speller than that.

Thanks jay. I have no idea how to do a paypal acct or other charity
account. We are all for it just dont know how to start. If someone else
can spearhead it or give me a step by step guide for how to do it it
would be best.
I did read the MeTa thread to him and he appreciates it all. Actually
made him laugh non ironically which is huge. More mefi snark pls.
Hangin out here, josh is napping bf surgery at 330 (pst--ed.). Things are quiet
which is good.
Loveamy

So, it's go on the PayPal. Check yr MeMail in a couple of hours, Space Kitty & others who ventured organizational help, I'm leaving work now (NOT BY BIKE) and will be back in a few...
posted by beelzbubba at 3:27 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

klang! no! Here's to some quick and thorough healin'. We'll miss you around here.

Also, beelzbubba: you seem like an awesome dad!
posted by defenestration at 3:43 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Best to klang and family - bright wishes for a speedy recovery. Please keep us posted on pitching in for medical, etc. Yay, dad.
posted by ersatzkat at 3:52 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Man, klang, that's awful. It sounds like you're going to be OK, but still... yeesh. Please get well soon.

I was trying to figure out if I've ever had a conversation with your here via MeFi mail, and I don't think I have. Yet your name is all over my mailbox because of those little favoriting and activity reports I send people. You're in almost all of them, which shows how central you are to this place.

And how great a dad is beelzbubba for doing all this stuff to help, including this posting?
posted by FishBike at 3:52 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Ouch. Femur and elbow. Wow.

Best wishes for a speedy and pain free recovery.
posted by Splunge at 3:58 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

This was just poor planning, klang. Incurring massive debt can be so much more fun than this. Trust me. Now get well, and somebody please contact me with the PayPal account info when you get it set up.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 4:03 PM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

Oh Klang, I'm so sorry this has happened to you! How awful!

I've been there.

Well, you can probably count on me (at least) to irritate you so severely you forget how much pain you're in for a moment sometime in the near future.
posted by jamjam at 4:07 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

wow. sucks to be you, dude. but at least you have an awesome father. and a pretty bitchin' girlfriend.

let me know when the paypalism begins. i'm down with helping out.
posted by msconduct at 4:07 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

That sucks, I'm really sorry. :-(

Random technical note re the busted arm: Windows Vista (and I trust Windows 7) has a free speech-to-text utility built in. All you need is a headset with a microphone, and Windows can transcribe your speech into words. Finding this was a real lifesaver when I broke my wrist last year!
posted by ErikaB at 4:10 PM on March 9, 2010

I, for one, welcome our new cyborg-klangklangston overlord.
posted by Navelgazer at 4:23 PM on March 9, 2010 [16 favorites]

Ow! OW, ow!

Heal up quick, dude!!!
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 4:28 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I don't have any money or health insurance but i will happily donate curmudgeonly rock criticism in kind.

You know, jonmc excretes curmudgeonly rock criticism from every pore in his body. We should get him riled up with a link to Pitchfork, wipe him down with a towel, and then rub that essence on klang's forehead. It'll heal him up right quick.
posted by invitapriore at 4:32 PM on March 9, 2010 [3 favorites]

Best wishes for a speedy recovery.
posted by popechunk at 4:41 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Name of fuck, that's some shitty news. Def. up for helping out Klang if poss.
posted by bonaldi at 4:43 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

You know, jonmc excretes curmudgeonly rock criticism from every pore in his body. We should get him riled up with a link to Pitchfork, wipe him down with a towel, and then rub that essence on klang's forehead. It'll heal him up right quick.

Whatever works.

Anyways, PapaKlang, send him my best wishes for a speedy recovery and tell him at least he was biking, since only a nobody walks in LA.
posted by jonmc at 4:51 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

We can rebuild him. We have have the technology. Better. faster. Stronger. Embedded Wifi connection. My gods, it could be beautiful.
posted by The Whelk at 5:24 PM on March 9, 2010 [11 favorites]

I've always liked klangklangston's contributions here, and I hope he returns to MetaFilter soon.
posted by KokuRyu at 5:31 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

klang is one of the few users who will cause me to not participate in a thread if he's there, because I am terrified of being on the opposing side of a debate with him. Get well soon, etc.
posted by Think_Long at 5:40 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

No snark, but will bottomless rage at our fucked up health care system do? Best wishes for a speedy recovery and take care, klang.
posted by melissa may at 5:41 PM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

Ouch, in every sense of the word. Heal up there, fellah.

now I'm feeling a bit odd about riding my scooter home tonight in LA, agh
posted by davejay at 6:00 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

With all that metal in his body, next time he wipes out he really will go "klang"!
try not to wipe out again - we need you around here!

Get well soon, Robo-klang!
posted by Quietgal at 6:06 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Holy shit, I love that dude. I wish I could slice off a thick shank of Australian Socialized Health Care and send it to him in a care package, I really do.
posted by Ritchie at 6:31 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Klang rescued me from Anaheim and took me and a pal out for Korean food. He sent me crazyporn in the mail, hopefully violating several local ordinances. His gf is alibrarian [sorry to out you holyrood!] and I've been MeMailing with his dad this week. I just got back from a few solid days of travel, and I would be happy to chip in however is useful [maybe we can all pretend we're buying t-shirts so that we don't run afoul of PayPal] and I'll think good thoughts about some sort of fundraiser if it comes to that. In the meantime, I am very good at getting people to do what I say on the phone, so I offer my services navigating terrible phone situations if that's helpful. Sorry for the late reply, but I did send a postcard from Alaska.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 6:32 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh no. I pay little attention to who is who around here, but Klang is one of the peeps I notice. In a good way. Get well soon, dude.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 7:08 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

LA infrastructure being what it is, the sidewalk ate his tire, he went overboard.

Sounds like time to lawyer up!

Best wishes for a speedy recovery & a successful lawsuit.
posted by UbuRoivas at 7:08 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

here's to a very speedy recovery! Hooray for an awesome dad, gf and community!
posted by Wuggie Norple at 7:10 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Damn, dude. Feel better, klang. And hey, if somebody could ID the piece of shit sidewalk that did this to you, I bet a mob of a couple hundred mefites could be there in a jiffy to fuck that sidewalk UP, send some pictures of broken concrete to all its sidewalk friends, etc.
posted by chinston at 7:28 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

No! FIX the sidewalk! Repair it! Reform it! Teach it the error of it's ways!
posted by The Whelk at 7:39 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Perhaps speicus and the world famous could arrange some sort of internet celebrity pop song to raise funds and awareness about the dangers of broken concrete. Call it "Fill it with Love (Hole in the Sidewalk)" or something.
posted by mandymanwasregistered at 7:53 PM on March 9, 2010 [3 favorites]

eh, they'll just chalk snark all over it:

FTMFA!

tl;dr (too lopsided, didn't ride)

this sidewalk, it bike-breaks?

etc.
posted by UbuRoivas at 7:53 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

"We're Filling The Hole (With Our Love)"
posted by The Whelk at 7:56 PM on March 9, 2010 [4 favorites]

Hot damn, sir. Get thee well fast!
posted by casarkos at 7:58 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Sending my hopes and thoughts for a quick recovery. If employment and ability recur, I'll be happy to pitch in. All the best to you, you're one of the best here.
posted by scottymac at 8:09 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

"We're Filling The Hole (With Our Love)"

Okay that's ... that's just not going to work.
posted by odinsdream at 8:22 PM on March 9, 2010 [4 favorites]

Well, dang.

Seriously, get pictures of the spot of where the accident was, even if you don't think you are going to sue; a nice set of pictures can be a lovely prop for a Very Serious Discussion About Liability with the municipal institution. They also make excellent targets on a dartboard. And would make stellar greeting cards.
posted by julen at 8:30 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Things like this make me want to marry, gay marry, sponsor, adopt, hire or import any MeFite who is in a position where they have to choose between financial ruin and bodily harm.
posted by Sallyfur at 8:36 PM on March 9, 2010 [6 favorites]

Hope you're feeling better soon.
posted by nola at 8:48 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well soon.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 9:09 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh my! I know I'm a total stranger, but you're almost like a doublekin, a la sambosambo, dirtdirt and nikitanikita. And I've liked your posts, Klangklangston. I hope your fingers find their way back to a keyboard, and your legs are once again sturdy beneath you soon. Thumbs up for having such a great girlfriend and dad. *Gives the sidewalk the side eye.....*
posted by anitanita at 9:50 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Sorry to hear about this! I can give money or do whatever I can reasonably do.
posted by drjimmy11 at 10:01 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Thanks for the update. Hope klang is well much sooner than expected. Do let us all know about a way to help with funds.
posted by librarina at 10:02 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Dang, I was wondering just last night where Klang was. Here's hoping his beard escaped unscathed and that the rest of him heals quickly.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 10:17 PM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

Klangklangston has a posse.
posted by warbaby at 10:19 PM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

Oh, crap, I'm not good at snark like that one guy . . . what's his name, klangklangston? Where has he been lately? Anyhow, this thread was way tl;dr.

See, I'm really not good at it.

I'm so sorry to hear about this, and very best of wishes. If there's a paypal donation thing, I definitely want to know.
posted by treepour at 10:21 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Count me in too with whatever fund happens. I was so glad to meet klangklangston and holyrood at Meskerem a few years back!
posted by brujita at 10:31 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh man, I missed this earlier. Heal up fast, klang.

And of course I'm in for an imaginary t-shirt.
posted by tangerine at 10:37 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

If everyone here contributes 50 cents, we're golden. Let's get this fund going. We need an LA mefite to set up a trust. do we have Ca legal help on that?
posted by Ironmouth at 10:46 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Yikes. Poor dude. Hope he heals up soon!
posted by MeatLightning at 10:58 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

We need an LA mefite to set up a trust. do we have Ca legal help on that?

Let's see what AskMe suggests...

*Runs, hides*
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 10:58 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Another heretofore unnamed member of the Klangklangston posse checking in. Hope you're healing up good and fast!
posted by hapax_legomenon at 11:01 PM on March 9, 2010

Fucking ow. Get well soon.
also: let's please act smartly and avoid the n-th Paypal fuckup (user #100,000 raffle fund, anyone?)
also also: PONY: make mefi-spousing legally valid, so us europeans (or canadians) can spouse Klangklangston and the oodles of uninsured mefites to grant them communist socialized universal healthcare.
posted by _dario at 11:17 PM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

Oh, please. You know this is an elaborate ruse to improve his four-square game. Feint left... BIONIC ELBOW RIGHT!
posted by team lowkey at 11:19 PM on March 9, 2010 [2 favorites]

As a 10 year long knower of KK, I don't have ant good stories about Pixies albims, but I will be putting together a care package to bring to him and Amy. If anyone wants me to bring them something, memail me.
posted by k8t at 11:22 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

I saw an episode of Judge Judy that featured a woman who sold photos of items on eBay. "Photo" being mentioned once in small font in her long item description, but I digress. Seems to me that it'd be just as easy to send someone an emailed photo. They could come in different sizes. DYKWIS?*

*Do you know what I'm sayin?
posted by heyho at 11:40 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Klangklangston Industries are working diligently behind the scenes to bring you cutting edge virtual t-shirt technology!

We're investigating donation systems, trust funds, paypal setup details and a professional white background - and we expect to have an announcement about how you can help shortly.

Behold the power of MeFi!

(You guys are awesome. Seriously.)
posted by Space Kitty at 11:50 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Klangklangston, I hope you feel better soon. Poor you!

(I'm still reeling from the $50 000 figure. I'll keep an eye out for any fundraising that happens--I'll gladly chip in.)
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 12:13 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Klang! As a fellow urban bike rider, I'm so sorry to hear that this has happened.

With someone saying that all bike riders need to budget for catastrophic insurance, its clear to me that I need a preemptive,
legally beneficial spousing. I ride a bike not for shits and giggles, but because I cannot afford a car during this year long job search.
I'm cute, smart, wanna have kids, sometimes funny. But I'm underemployed and incredibly broke. The $700 bill from my flu makes me well up. $50,000? And a broken elbow? I could do the job I have - 11 hours/week knitting instructor.

I can afford the fake tee-shirt if it's $10. I bought 2 mefi shirts with some dogsitting money. Since metafilter talked me into spending $100 on an earache and gave me the confidence to go to urgent care not too long after that for the flu, I'll pay it forward.

Wow. That's so tl;dr. The point - klang and family: this place is great because you contribute here. I hope this gets healed quickly.
posted by bilabial at 12:20 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Nowhere near LA, but looking forward to helping out - either by sending ridiculous thing by mail, or via paypal.

Want anything special from Australia?
posted by mosessis at 12:41 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Good lord. Speedy recovery to you, dude.

More of a thud than a klang, amirite?
posted by Schlimmbesserung at 12:55 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I should really check in here more than once a week. God.

Fellow L.A. cyclist and accident survivor. Much love to you, Klang. My car, time, and money are at your service.
posted by mykescipark at 2:15 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I met klangklangston, beelzbubba and holyrood once. Later he made a completely unrelated comment that made me realize I'd been a little bit of a dick to him. That made me change and be a better person.

If he'd sent me bad porn over the mail he would have made me a better and a happier person.

As a fellow urban cyclist accidents are always on my mind. I am in for whatever funding solution you people come up with.
posted by dirty lies at 2:31 AM on March 10, 2010 [2 favorites]

Arrgh. Get well soon.
posted by XMLicious at 3:57 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh noes! Hope you heal fast, klang.
posted by dg at 4:40 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I made an FPP for you, klang.
posted by not_on_display at 5:07 AM on March 10, 2010 [4 favorites]

Dang, klang. I hope you heal soon.
posted by box at 6:07 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

KLANG KLANG KLANG GOES HIS MOTORS!

DING DING DING GOES YOUR DOOM!

ZING ZING ZING RIPS YOUR SPLEEN

AS HE THROWS YOUR HEART AROUND THE ROOM!
posted by The Whelk at 6:10 AM on March 10, 2010 [5 favorites]

Get better soon, klang, so you can come back and annoy me some more!
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:28 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Eponysterical!

Seriously, hope your recovery goes well. Count me in for a contribution to the klangklangston medical fund. Seems like somebody should write a Kiva-style web app for this kind of thing, with photos of deserving American recipients of emergency medical services.
posted by russilwvong at 6:38 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

When the paypal or whatever gets set up, please post it to the sidebar.
posted by yerfatma at 6:54 AM on March 10, 2010 [3 favorites]

Ouch, ouch and double ouch.

Best wishes for a speedy recovery man.
posted by caddis at 7:08 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Ouch. Add my love to the hole-filling. Please do keep us posted, on recovery, fundraising, or hilarious snark at the expense of brave urban bikers.
posted by crush-onastick at 7:19 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get better, klang.
posted by typewriter at 7:22 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

oh man. I'm so sorry to hear about this. Please get better soon, klang.
posted by shmegegge at 7:49 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

:( That's rough. Get better soon.
posted by gaspode at 8:18 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Some hospitals will forgive bills for uninsured (or underinsured) people who can't afford to pay astronomical costs. Look into the hospital having such a program.
posted by cass at 8:27 AM on March 10, 2010 [2 favorites]

Yeesh, terrible news. Good luck, Klang and family.
posted by paisley henosis at 8:30 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Yeah, health care in the US is seriously fucked.

I'll buy an imaginary t-shirt, and probably another for my cat.
posted by johnofjack at 9:20 AM on March 10, 2010 [2 favorites]

So sorry to hear about your expensive mishap, Klang, and I'm definitely on board whenever the T-shirt/paypally thingy is up and running.

Also, sorry, dude, but being bionic means that you will now set off every metal detector out there.
posted by redfisch at 10:31 AM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Can't we fly him to Sweden? Or Greenland? Get well soon, klangklangston.
posted by anniecat at 11:45 AM on March 10, 2010 [2 favorites]

I'm on the wrong coast for visiting, but I'll send my get-better vibes from afar! Also, count me in for a virtual t-shirt or two.

sincerely,
another Amy who also has a cyclist boyfriend
posted by alynnk at 12:14 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm sad about the crash, but utterly stoked about the Robocop reference.

Get well soon, Josh! If a Paypal fund ends up being needed, I will send what meager funds I can spare.
posted by wierdo at 12:35 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

So someone floated an idea to me in mail about the possibility of an art auction or raffle or giveaway or just make Klang feel better THING concerning all these bionic jokes.

I got a lot on my plate now, but I can say ...maybe.
posted by The Whelk at 1:30 PM on March 10, 2010 [8 favorites]

or just make Klang feel better THING concerning all these bionic jokes

an oilcan?
posted by jtron at 1:36 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oil can what?
posted by heyho at 1:44 PM on March 10, 2010 [3 favorites]

Hot damn, BionicKlang with no pants on, just like in my dreams!
posted by carsonb at 1:44 PM on March 10, 2010 [2 favorites]

Dude, that blows. Will send money for beer, and my copy of Cyborg (If I can find it).
posted by P.o.B. at 2:40 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

A heads up to all the fabulous, generous people who wanted to send stuff to Josh:

Amy (his SO) has given me permission to distribute their mailing address. I'll be emailing it to everyone here who said they wanted to help & anyone else who emails me to request it.

I can't thank everyone enough, but know there will be one hell of a meetup/recovery party when the time comes.

Hugs for everyone!
posted by Space Kitty at 2:43 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Ah, fuck, man. I've been taking a break from MeFi due to overwhelming other obligations but this is not news that I am happy to come back to. Klang's a capital guy who saved my butt on at least one occasion when I lived in LA, and he knows where all the best veggie restaurants are.

Get well soon, and let me know if there's anything I can do to help.
posted by athenasbanquet at 2:46 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm very sorry to hear this, but the more cyborg cyclist commenter-overlords there are In A World Without Hope, the better.
posted by Halloween Jack at 3:31 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

brief update from the parental front: first a disclaimer--i appreciate all the "gee yr a great dad" and yeah, i love the adulation of course, but holgagirl, his momma is a frequent lurker and is (imo) largely responsible for all the good klang qualities. i believe i sparked the contentiousness & the "i respect your opinion but you are fucked in the head" school of argumentation. so tho she's silent here, she is carrying heavy water on this trip, too.

i met with trust atty today with follow up next tuesday. (lack of caps due to my lame ipod skeelz). set up bank acct today & will correspond with space kitty & mr. space kitty to get the whole front end set up via blogger & (probably) paypal.

the paypal evilness reported upthread related specifically to 501-c-3 type charitable fund collection w/o proper paperwork upfront. paypal ultimately relented but not without sturm und drang. "new" paypal functions like "old" western union where anyone can send anyone money for any reason.

that's what we're setting up.

caveat or special request, if you will. paypal--like an other entity that processes credit/debit payments will take about a $3.00 cut out of every credit/debit transaction. if you are transfering from your bank acct to the fund acct it will be only abt 80 cents per tranasaction.

so--if you are donating funds <>
or, if you loathe paypal or are uncomfortable with them having any tentacles into your bank acct evar, consider sending direct to klang. if you email/memail me or space kitty, we'll throw you the land line.

and i'll say again, money is good & he'll surely need a ton, but your other gifts, including the snark & the uncanny likeness in the whelkian sketch, the gifts-in-bad-taste which he is about to receive, as well as the being there with a hug or a cup a joe for amy are worth their weight in gold also. as a family, we've never been hung up much on the material (must explain why we're so damn poor!)
posted by beelzbubba at 3:51 PM on March 10, 2010 [5 favorites]

so--if you are donating funds <> was supposed to say if you are considering donating funds less than $20...apparently i have lame ipod html skillz, too.
posted by beelzbubba at 3:54 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh no, so sorry to hear about your breakage, klang. As a fellow Michigander (not a native, but after 18.5 years, I feel that I've gone native), I'd be happy to send you some magical healing serum, i.e., Vernor's.

And of course, I can always use a few more invisible t-shirts. Kind regards to klang, holyrood, beezlbubba, and all of the klangstons.
posted by FelliniBlank at 4:21 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Um, where's our George Clooney? Now that's he done with that Haitian fundraiser thingie, he's probably bored and antsy (hence his scowly look at the Oscars). Please, George, we need you to head up the Klangathon for us.
posted by HeyAllie at 4:58 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

with klang's recent luck, our George Clooney is probably Patton Oswald.Though I think klang interviewed Charles Schreiber (voice of Roger Rabbit) once. That's gotta be worth something.
posted by klangklangston at 5:11 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Klang speak in only 3rd person now.
posted by The Whelk at 5:12 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

oh and don't be fooled by "klang" posting this. for some reason, his mom seems to have hacked his sign on, and this is beelz posting. we are the virtual klang.
posted by klangklangston at 5:13 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Hi, Ma! (good lord you startled the hell out of me beelz)
posted by Space Kitty at 5:14 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well, kks.
posted by bru at 5:20 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

oh and don't be fooled by "klang" posting this. for some reason, his mom seems to have hacked his sign on, and this is beelz posting.

oh the fun you could have...
posted by gman at 5:25 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I must admit the thought of my parents being on MeFi is a bit odd. I am quite a bit older than Klang though.
posted by caddis at 5:50 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm just worried my Mom would get into classic roack arguments with jonmc that would NEVER END.
posted by The Whelk at 5:52 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Man, theyre gonna love you in airports now, Klang.

Hope you mend up quickly and well!
posted by perilous at 6:26 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well soon, Klang!

Dad and Amy, you guys are rad. Remember to take care of yourselves too!
posted by giraffe at 7:23 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Congratulations on the screw in the elbow! You are now in the same elite category as my Dad, Stephen Fry, and countless other unlucky buggers.

I hope you get some good drugs out of it and that you feel much, much better soon.
posted by h00py at 7:30 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh crap! Sending along the healing vibes dude.
posted by eyeballkid at 7:41 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

what the fuck? that utterly sucks.

heal quickly and well, klang!
posted by rmd1023 at 7:52 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Well, it seems Klangklangston & I share a birthday! Who knew. *off to email Space Kitty*
posted by IndigoRain at 8:39 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Update from Amy: Josh got out of bed today! Woo!

She (and he) are so amazed by all of the support from the MeFi community: "the outpouring of love from you guys and total strangers is just overwhelming and amazing; i am truly grateful."

Will continue to update!
posted by k8t at 8:46 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I am not sure if it's good or bad that klang's clicked "remember password" on every browser he's logged into meta on (quick, LA mefites, check to see if you can post as klang!).

i'm still reading this thread to him aloud periodically and frankly it makes both of us tear up and go all mooshy or laugh aloud; both are great. TheWhelk, I do not know you, but i owe you a beer. maybe it's the sleep deprivation, but bionic klang drawings are about the funniest thing of all time right now.

thanks also to everyone for your posts here, memails, emails, and calls to offer help of financial and non--financial types. i will follow up with each of you as our needs become clearer; he's still in the hospital and we'll be figuring out when he will leave and what kind of care he'll need over the next few days. it is all just so heartwarming and i and klang truly appreciate it. go internets superfriends!
posted by holyrood at 8:58 PM on March 10, 2010 [6 favorites]

holyrood: frankly it makes both of us tear up and go all mooshy or laugh aloud

Oh noes! We may have gone too far. We might lose the irascible curmudgeon and get some sort of nicey-nicey klangklangston, who's all about going along to get along. Uh, quick... say something fighty someone... uh... klang, your beard is too fluffy! You, uh, pepper your food without tasting it first! Eh... you... erm... couldn't bust a rhyme if you were playing Bust-a-Move 2 with a rhyming dictionary!

For the love of Jebus, help me out here someone, there's way too much schmoop in here, I can't get the snark flowing!
posted by Kattullus at 9:08 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

THE SCHMOOPS SHALL MAKE HIM STRINGER! CHANTING TIME! SCHMOOP! SCHMOOP! SCHMOOP!
posted by The Whelk at 9:11 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I only bring schmoopy to this thread tonight. A big heap of schmoopy.

Sent out my mefi postcards yesterday. Will send klang one tomorrow. Or Friday, more likely.
posted by bilabial at 9:29 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

I was floored when I first heard about this over in the meetup thread. Amy and Josh, it meant a lot to me how you were willing to help out a random mefite who moved to the neighborhood, and even if we didn't have a chance to really hang out, it was great when we could. I'll be in touch when I get back from my trip, but know that there is help nearby if you guys need it, even if that help comes in the form of some strange beverage and comic books.
posted by mrzarquon at 10:39 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Keep walking, Klang! It'll help a lot. (Laid up for nine days once myself and man, that first day up was a killer... but so good when it was over.)
posted by fairytale of los angeles at 10:58 PM on March 10, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well soon, Klang. Let us know if the ghost of the gipper shows up and blathers about tax cuts before passing out in his own ghost-drool.
posted by dr_dank at 3:44 AM on March 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

I wouldn't worry too much about klang going all Rodney King on us all. It's in his nature not to suffer fools gladly and I am not exempt when I am foolish. He probably cuts me more breaks and for that I am grateful, otherwise I'd have to thrash him & I'm not sure I still could...of course, while he's convalescing I could kick his ass.
posted by beelzbubba at 4:05 AM on March 11, 2010 [3 favorites]

re: 4-square comments upthread & FPP, one of my first thoughts once we knew klang was going to be ok, was--"Well, looks like he'll be demoted to the D league in 4 Square"
posted by beelzbubba at 4:56 AM on March 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Well this bites - heal fast and well so you can set off airport x-rays all over. Can only shudder contemplating getting around w/bunged up elbow AND leg.
posted by leslies at 5:41 AM on March 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Get well soon!
posted by asok at 5:51 AM on March 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Here's to a speedy but prudent recovery.

Is it entirely too soon to suggest a tshirt--"MetaFilter is my health insurance"?
posted by The Potate at 6:43 AM on March 11, 2010 [2 favorites]

I'm slow to notice this post, but Klang is one of my favourite mefites, and I hope things go as well as they possibly can. Get well! x
posted by ArmyOfKittens at 8:07 AM on March 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

This isn't "terrible news" as someone wrote above... terrible news is news you can't eventually walk away from.

This is just "bad news" but it's still bad news and I just dropped in to wish him all the best. Let's get that social machinery going (where's the donation link?) - and let's hope that in 10 years this is a mostly forgotten bad memory.
posted by lupus_yonderboy at 8:24 AM on March 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Is it entirely too soon to suggest a tshirt--"MetaFilter is my health insurance"?

This would be an excellent invisible t-shirt for PayPal purposes.

Get well soon, klang!
posted by EvaDestruction at 8:36 AM on March 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

I propose selling macro'd photos of some dude with a naked chest that says, "INVISIBLE T-SHIRT".

I would pay five bucks for that.
posted by backseatpilot at 9:00 AM on March 11, 2010 [6 favorites]

Hey all - be patient with me, I'm in all day meetings today so I'll get contact info out to you as soon as I can.

thanks!
posted by Space Kitty at 11:42 AM on March 11, 2010

Klang is one of my favourite mefites, and I hope things go as well as they possibly can.

Mine too, coming from someone who doesn't notice many user names. Don't forget what Askme is there for, to second-guess and over-ride your doctors recommendations.
posted by StickyCarpet at 4:22 PM on March 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Fifteen years or so ago I worked with a guy who basically had the same accident. The city of Ames (Iowa) decided to remove a four foot by four foot section of sidewalk. It was a nice sidewalk. Extra wide even.

It also ran parallel to an are where cyclists could not be on the road. Basically the road there is at a lower elevation than the sidewalk with no room for both car and cycle.

The city, doing their part put up tape and cones and flashing lights that let people know part of the upcoming sidewalk was missing. Ames being a college town...student stole this shit for their dorm rooms.

I failed to mention this is also at the bottom of a not-that-steep-but steep-enough hill.

It's nighttime. This guys is doing everything correctly. Light on bike. Reflective clothing. Etc. He's hauling ass, but this is the route he takes home every night.

He hits that missing section and goes ass over teakettle and does a faceplant. It pretty much ends his chance at modeling. He's got broken arms, broken ribs, broken jaw, knocked out teeth, etc.

Pretty much the story that started this thread, but probably worse. Braces and pins and casts and more stitches than you can imagine.

Fucked up, but there's an upside to this story (maybe). This guy was also in a band. They were popular locally and everyone thought they were going places. They even had a major record label contract lined up.

The band had a show in Des Moines, but this guy I worked with was obviously way too fucked up to play with them (I forget what instrument he played), so someone filled in. So the show goes off. He's bummed that he's all broken and unable to do his part.

After the show, driving back to Ames, the band crashes their car because not one of them was sober enough to be driving. None survive.

So because he was too fucked up to play he lived. I guess that's an upside.

This guy is lucky to have survived the first accident, and it's probably why he didn't die in the second, but of course he didn't see it this way. In his mind he'd lost his best friends and some guy died in his place and if only he'd been there he'd have been sober enough to drive. Yeah, right, like he wouldn't have been as drunk (and stoned). There's guilt for you.

I haven't thought about that guy in 15 years. I wonder where he is now.

I think there is a parable here. Even if Klang Klangston doesn't see an upside here there could still very well be one.

do people read down this far?
posted by cjorgensen at 6:44 PM on March 11, 2010 [2 favorites]

Best wishes for a quick and full recovery Klang! We miss you! Let me know when we decide what "invisible t-shirt" is being offered - I'm in!
posted by garnetgirl at 6:46 PM on March 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Just saw this via the sidebar. Get better, klang! I'll be riding my bike a little more carefully for the next while...
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 9:33 PM on March 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Klang, hope all your bones knit up nicely and all your screws are long and comfortable.

I'm sorry I can't help on the money front. I would bring you special delicacies from Van Nuys, but I don't think they exist.
posted by HE Amb. T. S. L. DuVal at 12:47 AM on March 12, 2010 [1 favorite]

do people read down this far?
All the way down, baby.
posted by dg at 5:34 AM on March 12, 2010 [1 favorite]

Only virgins go all the way down.
posted by backseatpilot at 6:07 AM on March 12, 2010 [1 favorite]

I... what?
posted by shakespeherian at 6:11 AM on March 12, 2010 [2 favorites]

brief (if that's possible for me) (see it started already) klang update.

He's gettiing sprung from RR-UCLA today & we're putting together a doodle scheduler later today as I get info from Amy, for those LA-fites who can/want to read Klang some bedtime stories. Or run some errands b/c Josh ain't running nowhere notime soon. (Triple negative--that's still a negative right? Damn, I miss Sparky Anderson)

Last night some amazing people came together to help Amy clear room in their apt. for a hospital bed and other appliances for our gentleman of leisure (space kitty & mr space kitty, Isaac & Amanda, Maureen, Carson B, cat) . And others volunteered to come & help in other ways (bookhouse, scody, and more).
Amy loquitor: we ate thai and cleaned the whole house. nicer than ever. annette cleaned the fridge and freezer and organized everything into plastic bags. a goddess. carson scrubbed the toilet and even the leaky spot behind the tank (!) and dealt with josh's "filing pile" and "art pile" (!!). it's like a team of cleaning ninjas showed up. we figured out the bed too, and will have space for josh and me and 1-3 guests at a time. perfect. thanks.


I talked to Josh for a few minutes & he was able to share some stories of life in RR-UCLA that had us both cracking up. While we were talking they strapped a mechanized boot on him to alternately stretch & flex his leg. Mecha-Klang hilarity ensued. Accompanied by the Whelk's drawings. Uncanny. Some barbs about Donna Harraway not quite getting all of the kinks out of cyborg theory. Something about being on the frontlines of cyborg praxis. And some choice expletives when they tried to get his mass vertical--with the PT folks exhorting encouragement like "The screws are weight bearing, get it? Weight bearing!" with klang responding that yeah, he got it, but the rest of the leg didn't RTFA.

We were originally coming out for spring break until the break turned out to be Josh's leg & arm. Now it looks like August unless they need us sooner. Plan on a mega-mecha-klang meetup in the swelters of SoCal August.
posted by beelzbubba at 8:15 AM on March 12, 2010 [1 favorite]

Damn. As a fellow cyborg (got a screw of my own in my right foot), I can tell you, it takes time, but you eventually do get used to dealing with all the subtle and more obvious forms of cyborgaphobia.

So, nolite te bastardes carborundorum.

Get better.
posted by saulgoodman at 10:34 AM on March 12, 2010 [1 favorite]

Yay, I'm a goddess! And to think all this time I've only been aiming for empress. (loving the updates beelzbubba-doing another long-slog work day, but I'll be in touch)
posted by Space Kitty at 11:48 AM on March 12, 2010 [1 favorite]

I know this isn't exactly what this thread's for, but klang, (and pace all the other extremely fine writers), I think you are the best prose writer on this website. One time I had your phrase "a broad and foolish tu quoque" in my head for days. Get well soon, stranger.
posted by skwt at 6:45 PM on March 12, 2010 [1 favorite]

Update time!

Everybody who offered help in this thread or contacted me for info should now have an email including contact info for Josh & Amy. Holler at me if you don't see it. Josh is now home (yay!) and the doodle (y do) schedule is now up if any local folks want to, as beelzbubba said, be on call to help with bedtime stories, errands, etc.

I have to say, participating in all this has really restored my faith in humanity. You guys here are great.
posted by Space Kitty at 11:35 PM on March 12, 2010 [1 favorite]

I know this was mentioned a bit upthread, but seriously: consider talking to a lawyer regarding options for recouping damages. I'm not sure how distasteful that is to Josh, but this sort of thing is exactly what the injury bar was made to handle.

If this is an option you're willing to consider I would suggest getting a consultation sooner than later just to make sure no limitation or notice dates are missed.

I'm sure some mefites could help with a referral if necessary.

No matter what, though, best wishes for recovery.
posted by AV at 5:03 AM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

I have to say, participating in all this has really restored my faith in humanity.

Yeah, that's nice and all, and I feel it too, but I'm still gonna give the folks from the Public Works building the what-for tomorrow morning.
posted by carsonb at 7:14 AM on March 13, 2010 [4 favorites]

I am kind of shocked to find myself namechecked here (my post was mostly done out of rage), but wow.

And much best to klang - I'm opposite coast, but I'll ponder my navel into leg repair.
posted by mephron at 9:51 AM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

Hey, Space Kitty, hit me with that email, would you, I don't have Amy's email.

Re: An L.A. specific meetup/fundraiser (KLANGAID 2010), anyone who wants to help in the initial planning, drop me a line (email in profile).
posted by Bookhouse at 10:20 AM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'd like to respectfully suggest that if at all possible, you figure out a way to allow people to directly donate funds without going through the route of emailing for information. As in "Click here to help", with a link to a PayPal account. It may seem a little crass, and I realize the fees are an issue, but on the whole I think it would be a lot more effective. We have quite a history here of people with the very best of intentions failing to follow through on actually putting something in mail (Secret Quonsar, CD swaps, etc.).

I say this mainly because following this thread, my initial reaction was "Of course I want to help!" and then continued to follow the thread for a couple days to figure out how. It's easy to imagine a lot of people who would have immediately sent money, but didn't keep coming back to the thread. And then there's people who followed the thread, but don't take the additional step of emailing for contact info.

I find myself in the position of thinking that the best thing to do would be to write a personal card and mail cash. But knowing how busy I am with things in my own life, I probably won't end up following through. I don't personally know klang, and it would be really easy to just do nothing. If it were just as easy to donate some money, it would already be done. I can't help but think there are a lot of people in the same boat. MeFites are a very generous bunch, but just like any charitable endeavor, the key is getting people's attention, and making it as easy as possible for them to contribute.

I sincerely apologize if you're specifically trying to avoid turning this into a charity case, or if I've offended in any way. Sometimes people need help, and other people want to provide help in whatever way they are able. Sometimes that way is plain old money.

Anyway, maybe it's something to consider for the KLANGAID meet-up. Include information in the post saying "If you can't attend, here's what you can do to help... contact this person if you want to send something personally... if you want to visit and help around the house go here... or you can chip in to the recovery fund here".
posted by team lowkey at 11:52 AM on March 13, 2010 [3 favorites]

What could be easier than mailing a check or Money Order? Space Kitty will give you the mailing address. As they say at Nike, Just Do It.

Money Orders are available from any Post Office for about $1.10 and up. Afaik, a stamp is still 44¢.
posted by Cranberry at 12:34 PM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

Well, what would be easier is sending money online. I'm admitting to my probably misplaced priorities, but if I have to take time away from work or personal projects to go to the post office, it probably won't happen. I don't even know where the nearest post office is. I'm not even sure where my checkbook is. I haven't used it in ages. It's gauche to admit, but on my list of things to get done in a day, figuring out how to send money to an internet stranger isn't going to raise to the top. I know that makes me a bad person, but I'm outing myself because I think it would benefit klang and family more for me to do so. I'm betting there are a lot of people who want to help, but even with the best of intentions, won't get around to it. Making it as easy as a few clicks means that more people will contribute. Simple as that.
posted by team lowkey at 1:35 PM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

Finding a way to allow people to contribute online will mean that more people contribute. If someone with more time/ability in this area can find a way to make that happen, it will be super duper useful
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 1:44 PM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

Also: some of us aren't the brightest bulbs. I have the mailing address and I even have a card that *will* get mailed (Monday! I promise! I am so bad with mail, but I do follow through for MeFites... eventually...), but it hadn't even occurred to me to send a check. But I did think "Oh yeah, if someone starts an online collection, I'll put some money in."

So, yeah, some of us just don't remember that money can be sent in any kind of analog fashion.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 2:45 PM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

That's why I'm sending him myrrh.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 3:58 PM on March 13, 2010 [2 favorites]

I hear everybody on the 'set up an online collection.' There are a lot of hoops to go through IRT to working with a lawyer to set up a trust, not getting screwed by paypal and making sure our efforts here don't interfere with other possible sources of help. A website is in the works and hopefully when the finer points are settled we can point folks there from the sidebar.

I know the checkbook/money order thing is really old school - thanks to everybody for all their help & suggestions.
posted by Space Kitty at 5:22 PM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

Thanks for taking that one, Space Kitty--I've been answering off list about the time delay between the thought and the thing. All goes well, we'll be able to have something up tomorrow or NLT Tuesday. I've been answering the folks, too, who consider ppal to be the Beast Incarnate, who want an address posted on a landing page. I don't think klang would have a big problem with that--but here I'll express a 56-yr-old's paranoia about phishers, pishers, and scamming scumbags having the direct address right out there.

I know that I have to trust in greater good intention of everyone here, and I do. I just have to hesitate half a mo' about posting a real street address on Blogger.

Quick update on klang--he's home & finding that truly there is no rest for the wicked. He's doing as well as expected and he's been nearly giddy over the cards he's received so far--and these are mostly the "get up, stand up" variety get well cards. Wait til he gets some money in hand...
posted by beelzbubba at 6:10 PM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

Hey guys, just got the borrowed laptop up and running. Haven't had time to read the whole thread here, but Amy was reading bits to me in the hospital, and I was tearing up. Thanks so much, so fucking much.
posted by klangklangston at 6:16 PM on March 13, 2010 [26 favorites]

Oh, I am so late in joining, but a fellow bike girl in OKC wishes lots of luck and a speedy recovery!!! Double thumbs up for a quick heal and to general cyborg-badassery. Yes. I just made that up.
posted by the_royal_we at 6:19 PM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

AW SHUCKS
posted by The Whelk at 6:25 PM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

klangklangston!!--You magnificent bastard!! Quick, say something irascible! xoxo
posted by OmieWise at 7:11 PM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

If you are looking for an easy way for people to donate money, why can't you just provide people with bank account details so they can transfer money? Is that problematic in the US for some reason?
posted by dg at 11:15 PM on March 13, 2010 [1 favorite]

dg said: ... why can't you just provide people with bank account details so they can transfer money? Is that problematic in the US for some reason?

This is not a good idea. The bank account details necessary to transfer a deposit are the same bank account details that would allow someone to shop online using your bank account.
posted by amyms at 11:48 PM on March 13, 2010 [2 favorites]

That's why I wondered if it would be problematic in the US. in Australia, you just need the BSB (bank, state, branch) number and the account number to do a direct deposit. These details are useless to you in online shopping, which would use a debit or credit card (with completely different numbers). It seems bizarre that you need PIN etc to deposit money into an account.
posted by dg at 12:37 AM on March 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

dg said: It seems bizarre that you need PIN etc to deposit money into an account.

You don't need a PIN to deposit money into an account.

in Australia, you just need the BSB (bank, state, branch) number and the account number to do a direct deposit.

Same here. And that's also all you need to make some online purchases (as well as automated bill payment services). So giving out that info to all and sundry, even if their intentions are altruistic, on a public forum, is not a good idea.
posted by amyms at 12:48 AM on March 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

I don't see how anyone can withdraw money from your account just because they know the account number. The BSB and account number details are included on pretty much every business invoice that gets generated in Australia and almost all payments are via direct deposit these days. I work for one of the largest government departments in the country and, the other day, it took quite a while to find someone in the finance area who knew how to get a cheque drawn up, because it's so rare.

Anyway, none of this helps klang get money, so I'll shut up now and stop distracting from the issue.
posted by dg at 1:09 AM on March 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

Klang is back! Yay! Excuse me while I do a little dance *doomptie doomptie ta ta ta too boo booo boo boo booooooo tatta tatta doomptie doomptie doooooooo ta ta ta*
posted by Kattullus at 1:24 AM on March 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

Excuse me while I do a little dance

Make a little love? Get down tonight?

Get down tonight?
posted by flapjax at midnite at 7:35 AM on March 14, 2010 [2 favorites]

Hope Klang heals fast. Happy to help if I can. Paypal is preferred.
posted by gen at 10:32 AM on March 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

I don't see how anyone can withdraw money from your account just because they know the account number.

In the US, that's absolutely possible, unless something has changed in the past 5 years. Bank and credit card security here is all window dressing. I run a small business and back in 2001 I naively put my business ABA and account number online as a payment option, since I had witnessed other large companies doing this. Four months later I started seeing porn charges from CCBill, etc, which apparently allow (or allowed) people to buy porn with only ABA routing & account #. The porn billers were gracious about erasing the charges but in the end I had to close the account and switched banks (since BoA was very unhelpful and tried to prevent me from disputing the charges).
posted by crapmatic at 11:15 AM on March 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

If someone makes t-shirts with klang's user picture on them, I will buy ten, even if they are vapor. That pic makes me smirk.

Feel better soon. I will help however I can.
posted by biscotti at 9:23 PM on March 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

Looks like I might get to klangsit a while tomorrow! I am so excited! I am his number one fan. There is nothing to worry about. He are going to be just fine. I am his number one fan.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 9:44 PM on March 14, 2010 [7 favorites]

Is that seriously the first Misery reference this whole time? Shirley someone made one before now.

AV, if you're downtown at all before heading west, I have some stuff maybe you could deliver unto the klangdom?
posted by carsonb at 9:47 PM on March 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

Naturellement, ma chèrie. Liberté, fraternité, deliveré!
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 10:45 PM on March 14, 2010 [1 favorite]

Liberté, fraternité, deliveré!

Should you really be making Deliverance jokes about a guy in traction?
posted by Forktine at 6:15 AM on March 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

To be fair he does have a pretty mouth.
posted by Pollomacho at 6:39 AM on March 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

That's why I'm sending him myrrh.

'S a dangerous animal, innit?
posted by Mister_A at 9:02 AM on March 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

Picture vegetarian delights, and get well soon.
posted by darth_tedious at 11:59 AM on March 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

klang favorited me!!!
posted by KokuRyu at 6:43 PM on March 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

KLANG LIVES
posted by fairytale of los angeles at 7:40 PM on March 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

Don't let 'em catch you ridin' dirty, AV.
posted by box at 7:45 PM on March 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

LONG LIVE KLANG

I got him something so ...correct. I felt it sprung into existence simply so I could find it for him. I love you like .....cats.
posted by The Whelk at 10:04 PM on March 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

I HOPE you like cats. i LOVE you like cats is just ...wrong.
posted by The Whelk at 10:26 PM on March 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

I wish I was down there so I could help out and keep Klang company or something, since time and good thoughts are really the only resources I have right now. So I guess I'll just keep sending good thoughts, and be glad that there's other Mefites like Ambrosia who can go keep his spirits up.

Get well soon, Klang. Glad the laptop is up and running.
posted by Caduceus at 10:35 PM on March 15, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm in shock - I need to check metatalk more often ... 300+ comments oozing with love, a quick chart for helpers, instant on the scene reports, parental outings, signs of healthcare revolt, and masses of minds musing on how to outmaneuver paypal ... this is HBO material. (fundraiser??)

Klang, bask in the love -- and start a list of who should play you in the film.
posted by Surfurrus at 1:58 AM on March 16, 2010 [2 favorites]

Since that came up as small talk on my last day of work: Either Jonathon Rhys Davies or Zach Galifinakis.
posted by klangklangston at 1:57 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

Klang faved me too! W00t!
posted by Lynsey at 2:41 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

Hey...if one of you awesome people maybe sent klang a check from your bank such that there is no user name associated with can you mefi mail me? I'm assembling a database of such info and want to make sure everyone is included!
posted by mandymanwasregistered at 3:24 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

Also, if your name is blazecock pileon it would also be awesome if you sent me your email or snail mail info. kthx.
posted by mandymanwasregistered at 3:34 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

Jonathon Rhys Davies or Zach Galifinakis.

Lets combine the two!
posted by The Whelk at 4:54 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

SENSUOUSLY!
posted by The Whelk at 4:54 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm pretty sure J.R. Davies sensuously combines with someone in every movie/show that he is in. Zach Galfinakis seems like the celibate type to me.
posted by Think_Long at 5:10 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

Zack doesn't have to be, I got a six pack of champagne and a funnel!
posted by The Whelk at 5:16 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

Dear God, after you drink the champagne what are you planning on doing with the funnel?
posted by Think_Long at 5:29 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

I will be doing ...things.
posted by The Whelk at 5:46 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

... stuff.
posted by carsonb at 5:49 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

Crap, I just saw this linked from the sidebar. Best wishes for a swift and complete recovery, klang.
posted by felix betachat at 9:18 PM on March 18, 2010 [1 favorite]

More breaking news!!!! the Klang Donation Portal has opened a door into the 4th dimension. Visit klangklangston.blogspot.com to buy your Invisible T-Shirt (actually better than that, a real! digital photo taken by klang & digitally processed by his very own momma, holgagirl).
posted by beelzbubba at 4:04 PM on March 19, 2010

Oh, and btw--when we first started watching Bored to Death, we referred to Zach Galifianakis as 3/4 Josh (we're of the opinion that Z. G. is not the Man Mountain that is Klang).
posted by beelzbubba at 4:07 PM on March 19, 2010 [1 favorite]

Mt. Klang has conquered many a man.
posted by The Whelk at 4:13 PM on March 19, 2010 [1 favorite]

I want to know who ends up being Klang's dogsbody, BTW.
posted by The Whelk at 11:43 AM on March 20, 2010 [1 favorite]

I am losing weight here on my back. Losing weight but gaining beard. Can't shave 'til I have someone who can clean up the shavings (oh, and until I can shower).
posted by klangklangston at 6:24 PM on March 20, 2010

A hairy, unwashed cyborg. Excellent.
posted by rtha at 6:34 PM on March 20, 2010 [1 favorite]

NOW I HAVE TO DRAW IT.
posted by The Whelk at 7:11 PM on March 20, 2010 [3 favorites]

actually how would we get an auction-system in place for some Art if I ..actually ..do it..
posted by The Whelk at 7:12 PM on March 20, 2010 [1 favorite]

Holy shit I just discovered this! That'll teach me to pay attention to the sidebar! Klang, get well - and hang in there... I spent six months in a hospital after my motorcycle accident, so I know it can be tough sometimes. When you get out we can compare scars :) And don't think about the $ & any bills at the moment, concentrate on getting well (yeah, had to deal with that too). One piece of advice - do the physical therapy as soon as possible and don't slack off on it, even when it's painful.
posted by VikingSword at 10:49 PM on March 20, 2010 [1 favorite]

I got my invisible t-shirt! It's the greatest invisible t-shirt I've ever had!
posted by grapefruitmoon at 7:46 AM on March 21, 2010 [2 favorites]

> actually how would we get an auction-system in place

Come on, people, art is about to happen here! The Whelk sits, pen poised above paper, ready to limn the newest manga hero (or is it mecha? I can never keep it straight). All he needs is a venue to offer it to his adoring public.

If we want to do an auction, eBay would probably be easiest, but I think a raffle invisible T-shirts would probably raise more money. Not to be confused with the other invisible T-shirts, these would be Invisible Robo-Klang invisible T-shirts. (Wear yours to your next meetup!) Except for the lucky winner, who gets to hang a hairy unwashed pantsless cyborg on their wall.
posted by Quietgal at 9:01 PM on March 21, 2010 [1 favorite]

Just sent in a donation via klangklangston.blogspot.com.
posted by russilwvong at 8:14 AM on March 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

I forwarded the info to my drinking gang with a bike problem. Heal up, guy!
posted by queensissy at 11:11 AM on March 22, 2010 [1 favorite]

Hey Josh, I'm about to be losing my job, but I gave what I could, because every little bit helps. I hope you're doing better.
posted by orville sash at 7:47 AM on March 23, 2010 [1 favorite]

my invisible t-shirt doesn't fit, dang it.
posted by saulgoodman at 1:47 PM on March 23, 2010

Looks good from here.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:50 PM on March 23, 2010

but would it be too much to ask, that you wear something underneath it?
posted by UbuRoivas at 4:03 PM on March 23, 2010

Hey, I got mine today!

Wait, Ubu, I have to wear something underneath it???? I was going to wear it to the anatomy course on transverse flaps...., shucks!
posted by Wilder at 2:18 AM on March 25, 2010

Really sorry to hear of your accident klangklangston. aww noo noo.

Glad you're alive and that the accident didn't impact your spine or cranium. A friend went ass over teakettle on his bike in NYC and faceplanted. A not funny broken jaw.

Suggesting Bone Builder with Boron during your recuperation.

As hard as it must have been for him to write it about his dear son, what a wonderfully written post of your dad's.

Lovely to see the community support here, as ever.

My good wishes for you in your recovery.
posted by nickyskye at 3:27 AM on March 25, 2010

Aww, thanks again guys.
posted by klangklangston at 10:08 AM on March 25, 2010

Nice to see a couple of entries from klangklangston. Tough to think that any one is using MeFi to stay sane while healing.
So - calling all MeFites - be interesting and post fantastic things to entertain him.
posted by Cranberry at 3:40 PM on March 25, 2010

Tough to think that any one is using MeFi to stay sane while healing.

Dude I'm a Cleric level 12. CAST CURE SERIOUS WOUNDS.
posted by The Whelk at 5:11 PM on March 25, 2010

Can a level 12 Cleric even cure serious wounds?
posted by P.o.B. at 2:13 PM on March 26, 2010

Can a level 12 Cleric even cure serious wounds?

Come on, dude, it's only a 3rd level Cleric spell.
posted by adamdschneider at 2:48 PM on March 26, 2010

Heck, nowadays a 12th level Cleric can Raise the Dead. Or; when properly equipped, turn you into a Lich. Whatever you prefer.
posted by Mitheral at 5:13 PM on March 26, 2010

Well it depends on your chosen Deity. I chose the Random Fortune Of Chance, so the actual skill-levels are a bit ...non-standard.

I could try for Resurrection, but end up turning you into a rabbit. Or a Litch. Or a Litch Rabbit.
posted by The Whelk at 5:15 PM on March 26, 2010

Thor is Chaotic Good and has a kickin' beard.
posted by klangklangston at 11:16 AM on March 28, 2010

Welcome back, klang. & Thor is the awesomest deity evah, so go for it.
posted by msalt at 11:42 AM on March 28, 2010

I love this bar!
posted by humannaire at 9:55 PM on March 28, 2010 [1 favorite]

So something did come of the whole art idea after all
posted by The Whelk at 11:11 AM on April 8, 2010 [3 favorites]

Need to flip it to make it the right arm, but awesome! Now I will use my cyborg powers very slightly for good on the whole!
posted by klangklangston at 6:01 PM on April 8, 2010

Iron Klang And Deadpool, going off having adventures as the New new Avengers. Adventures that mostly ed at O'Mally's bar and a fresh blast-fire hole in the wall.
posted by The Whelk at 6:07 PM on April 8, 2010