GNFTI, you complete MONSTER
. How could you. I trusted
posted by Rhaomi to MetaFilter-Related at 12:51 PM (67 comments total)
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I first suspected you harbored an unspeakable grudge
against me when I didn't receive my prize for the 2011 post contest -- a sonnet -- for my post about Italo Calvino's Invisible Cities
. But then you sent me an exceedingly apologetic and humble message explaining how life and two jobs had got in the way and that you felt such deep and heartfelt regret over letting it slip for so long and vowed to make it up immediately -- and that was really good of you.
My darkest suspicions were roused again when you said in closing that it would take an unusually long time to actually ship the package, and I was this close
to calling shenanigans -- until you mentioned you were mailing from the Netherlands, and I recalled that control of trans-oceanic shipping lanes and international customs agencies were not technically part of a moderator's purview. (pb really needs to get on that)
I figured all was well when the package finally arrived at my door, tearing open the box to reveal a thoughtful and gracefully written poem -- a genuine Petrarchan sonnet! -- on the subject of Cities, enclosed in a tasteful picture frame
Should patience with all of this silence grow thin
I'd seek out the loudest of places
Sketch out a circle that traces
Where endings die out and a noise could begin.
Then were I to tire of that boisterous din
I'd see if the clamor encases
Calmer ancillary bases
Whose quiet gives way to the bustle within.
Which holds a yet milder inversion
By this time I'm skipping in triplicate, savoring
Clues of conclusions which never arrive.
It's infinite inward incursion.
And still I will stick to insistently wavering:
Who then shall say that I am not alive?
Truly lovely work! And not only that, but sweet and sour licorice drops! And Stroopwafels
-- acclaimed by at least one YouTube expert as "a fucking good cookie"!
(It's true!) Dank je wel!
This was more generous than I'd ever expected.
But all a ruse it turns out -- nothing but bait
for the cruelest psychological torture imaginable. For packed between and below these kind gifts, the true surprise:
Unpoppable. Bubble wrap.
GOOD NEWS FOR THE INSANE, INDEEEEEEEEED
(but seriously gnfti, this was all such great stuff, thank you so much!)