2015 Secret Quonsar Thank You Thread! November 14, 2015 12:35 PM   Subscribe

A mysterious package arrived in the mail this morning. My first thoughts was, "My Quonsar gift?!", followed quickly by "Who on earth would be that on-the-ball to get out their gift this early?!?!" The answer? My Quonsarer, that's who!! Thank you so much for the yummy vegan creme-filled cupcakes, the Japanese "knowledge cards", and the fun maps of San Francisco. Happy Quonsar, everyone!
posted by ochenk to MetaFilter Gatherings at 12:35 PM (982 comments total) 65 users marked this as a favorite

i guess this speaks to my childhood (and sweeping social assumptions), but my first reaction to this post was a scandalised "they opened their presents early!"
posted by andrewcooke at 2:07 PM on November 14, 2015 [12 favorites]


Well, in my defense, the package was marked "open immediately, perishable." That being said, I don't save my Halloween candy for Thanksgiving, so why would I save my Quonsar gift for Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa? ;)
posted by ochenk at 2:18 PM on November 14, 2015 [5 favorites]


Don't bring your cultural imperialism into this! There isn't one specific day of quonsing! The Quonsar Season officially lasts from swap day until the day the last second chancer gift arrives.
posted by phunniemee at 2:19 PM on November 14, 2015 [30 favorites]


Hooray!

(Could you add the tag secretquonsar2015 just to help make this easier to find once it scrolls off the front page?)
posted by julen at 3:02 PM on November 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


Wha whaaa whaaaaaaa whaaaaaaaaaaaat?!

You people with your uber organisation skills disgust me.

Seriously though, y'all makin the rest of us look shabby.

SHABBY I SAY.
posted by Faintdreams at 3:43 PM on November 14, 2015 [13 favorites]


Are they maps of fun places in San Francisco? Or maps of San Francisco in a fun style? Or maps of San Franciscans who are having fun? Or maps of funny San Franciscans? Quonsarian minds want to know. Nay, need to know.
posted by OrangeDisk at 5:25 PM on November 14, 2015 [4 favorites]


I'm very impressed that gifts have been arriving already, while also feeling inadequate. ;)

I have some of my gift wrapped and ready, but decided I want to send it all in one go so will wait until I acquire the last portion. :)

Happy Quonsmas all - the world can use our Quosmas positivity right about now!
posted by firei at 5:48 PM on November 14, 2015


I haven't even had a chance to think about what I'm going to send. Utterly unfair, it that middle school science fair sort of way, where I made a lumpy, mispainted 'volcano' and somehow my booth is next to the 13 year old who built a working fusion reactor that is actually powering the school as we speak.

I mean, awesome, but unfair...
posted by Ghidorah at 6:13 PM on November 14, 2015 [18 favorites]


I've sent package 1 of 2. The first package was an easy Amazon order, so that's what went first. The second package, which is meant to enhance the first, is all homemade and needs to be decanted and packaged up and shipped, so I figure some time this coming week.
posted by kalessin at 6:40 PM on November 14, 2015 [2 favorites]


I'm so excited about what my quonsee wrote on their description that I'm looking for the perfect thing...and this gets me in trouble EVERY SINGLE YEAR. I need to just choose something!!
posted by xingcat at 6:46 PM on November 14, 2015 [4 favorites]


Inspired to get mine posted. Hoping for a very happy SQee!!!
posted by bearwife at 7:11 PM on November 14, 2015


This is my first year participating, and I have found the gift but just need to wait until next payday to order it. I hope my quonsee likes it. I've already enjoyed being part of it, because my quonsee is a member I hadn't previously known of but who is a very interesting person who gives great Ask answers in a particular area of expertise. I'd make them a contact but it might give the game away, so I'll have to wait until after the holiday.
posted by not that girl at 7:29 PM on November 14, 2015 [5 favorites]


Early request for photos! The photos were one of my favourite things about the thank you thread last year.
posted by E. Whitehall at 7:57 PM on November 14, 2015 [9 favorites]


I just realized (through very basic stalking) that my 2015 quonsee was the quonsar for one of my previous quonsees. We are all connected to each other, in a circle, in a hoop that never ends.
posted by Munching Langolier at 9:55 PM on November 14, 2015 [9 favorites]


I went quonsar shopping today but came away empty-handed. I have a vague idea of what I want to buy, I think, but was hoping to get more inspired in person today. Alas.
posted by jaguar at 10:01 PM on November 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


Hey quonsee, did Henry Cavill arrive? I put stamps on him and everything.
posted by maxwelton at 2:27 AM on November 15, 2015 [4 favorites]


I have most of my package ready but am still whipping up the handmade part. Hope it doesn't come out too bent.
posted by holborne at 10:01 AM on November 15, 2015


Great, it's barely mid November and I'm already feeling guilty about Christmas, THANKS OBAMA
posted by litleozy at 10:17 AM on November 15, 2015 [9 favorites]


I got a card from my secret quonsar that reads "IT IS COMING. Be good." It made my day yesterday!
posted by sarcasticah at 11:37 AM on November 15, 2015 [14 favorites]


I have never Secretly Quonsed but I find the whole thing utterly delightful and charming every year.

<3
posted by kenko at 1:29 PM on November 15, 2015 [8 favorites]


Making my *first ever post* to thank my quonsar, who picked out something excellent despite my meager lurker MeFi activity. Thank you, schleppo, for the wonderful cookbook, which is indeed new to my library. My colleagues will probably thank you too, as they are the usual beneficiaries of my baking experiments. Your speedy delivery was well-timed to end an otherwise crappy week on a high note. Happy SQ to you too! :D
posted by bunnysquirrel at 6:46 PM on November 15, 2015 [12 favorites]


I just bought my quonsee's gift today, and OMG it is the most awesome thing ever. I'm super-duper excited to send it.
posted by OrangeDisk at 6:52 PM on November 15, 2015 [2 favorites]


Ordered my Quonsee's gift and hope to ship it by the end of the week-- perhaps it will be used over the Thanksgiving holiday ...
This is so much fun--why on earth is this the first year that I've Quonsarred???
posted by bookmammal at 7:09 PM on November 15, 2015 [1 favorite]


I am waiting for something to arrive in the mail before I can ship off my gift but this has been the best week of shopping for my quonsee. I bought something first that was probably too expensive and my partner chided me that I should really try to keep to the spending limit to make things fair for everyone, so I returned it. It actually turned out well, because I had to get creative and now the package will be that much more interesting. I'm almost sad this doesn't happen more than once a year, but then it wouldn't be special...
posted by thetortoise at 5:07 AM on November 16, 2015


Meanwhile the rest of us, who have not lifted a finger beyond opening the email revealing our quonsee, are OBVIOUSLY just putting that much more thought into process.
posted by Kabanos at 8:54 AM on November 16, 2015 [12 favorites]


My quonsee's gift will arrive on Wednesday. I'm all worried now! What if they hate it! I'm assuming this is a normal part of the SQ experience.
posted by ilovewinter at 8:59 AM on November 16, 2015 [3 favorites]


Meanwhile the rest of us, who have not lifted a finger beyond opening the email revealing our quonsee, are OBVIOUSLY just putting that much more thought into process.

Upon reading my swap email I immediately came up with two perfect gifts. I spent several days doing various keyword googles to try to find either one of them. I've resigned myself to the fact that item one just plain doesn't exist, and item 2 doesn't exist in anything less than a ~$300 version, which obviously isn't going to work.

So I've spent the last couple days thinking about maybe making something that would work for item 1, but knowing it would turn out horribly, like preschooler's artwork level horribly, and be completely stupid and unrecognizable as the thing that I want it to be, so that obviously won't work either.

What I need to do is think of something else but my heart is so set on either of the two things that immediately came to mind that I'm not ready to take that step yet.

Quonsing is hard.
posted by phunniemee at 9:01 AM on November 16, 2015 [9 favorites]


If it comforts you, I just ordered something I think is perfect, but now worry it is too perfect and my Quonsee will already own it.

Quonsing is indeed hard!
posted by corb at 9:09 AM on November 16, 2015 [5 favorites]


I have everything for my quonsee except one homemade thing that I will create this weekend (or at least I will as soon as Mr minsies gets home, as he purchased something for me today) and I am super excited to package it all up. Super excited and also super nervous. I'll probably post the package early next week.

thetortoise, you're not the only one who had to walk back to the spending limit (although I am keeping my extra thing because it is something that I can use).
posted by minsies at 9:20 AM on November 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm all worried now! What if they hate it! I'm assuming this is a normal part of the SQ experience.

Yup. No worries, though, they will be thrilled. There is something very wonderful about getting a thoughtful gift from someone anonymous who happens to be a MeFi. It almost doesn't matter what it is. I find I tend not to use my SQ gifts. I just look at them and feel the same delight all over again that they were sent. Feels like a magical experience to me.
posted by bearwife at 10:40 AM on November 16, 2015 [8 favorites]


It's really hard to come up with a unique gift for someone with a well-established hobby. Surely, my Quonsee must already have everything I can possibly think of, right? What if I've picked out the worst possible thing? Or something that's so passe? SO MUCH QUONSING PRESSURE!
posted by MsVader at 11:48 AM on November 16, 2015 [9 favorites]


I'm all worried now! What if they hate it! I'm assuming this is a normal part of the SQ experience.

It's a very common reaction, and totally understandable. With most folks, you are going to have a baseline reaction of "Oooh! Present!" with a topping of "...from the Internet..." and the maraschino cherry of "from a Mefite!" And that's before they even open the present! There may be a few grouches out there, but the vast majority of situations end up well. I will say that in my history, what seemed to be the least of the presents given to me (and the one I was side-eying a bit) has ended up being one I use almost daily.

Mostly, I want to say, You can't control how people react. Some people are pleased but reserved. Some people are pleased and exuberant. Some people might think you missed the mark but love the gesture/giftiness of it. Some folks might be disappointed but courteous. Some folks might be a little baffled but intrigued. Some folks might intend to write a thank you after work, but life gets in the way and the thank you note keeps slipping down and off the to do list.

In a few cases a quonsar who has done their best has a quonsee who still feels let down. This doesn't mean that the quonsar is bad person or is a failure or the quonsee is an ungrateful wretch; it just means there was a rare misfire between two people who meant well. In a very few cases, a quonsar who clearly hasn't particularly cared or tried or read the guidance has sent something super-cruddy to their quonsee (e.g. sending things you've specified you are super-allergic to in your guidance, items so (dirt) filthy you don't want to touch them, etc.) You should let us know if this happens to you.
posted by julen at 1:54 PM on November 16, 2015 [14 favorites]


I have been Quonsed!

Thank you so much for the awesome Bar Book, kalessin!
This should help me step up my cocktail game, which is much appreciated.

Greedy bugger that I am, I'm also super excited/grateful/humbled about forthcoming "part two" mentioned upthread here. You rock kalessin!

Also, for your entertainment E. Whitehall, here are a few pictures of me unwrapping my awesome gift.
posted by OntologicalPuppy at 2:17 PM on November 16, 2015 [20 favorites]


Yes I love when there are pictures posts! Well done OntologicalPuppy! (and kalessin, too, I guess!)
posted by firei at 2:57 PM on November 16, 2015 [3 favorites]


OntologicalPuppy, you are quite welcome! I was torn between the PDT Cocktail book, which I got quonsed with I think 2 years ago, and the book I sent you, which I got for my birthday this year, from a friend who has always been very encouraging about my cocktails and bar interests. For what it's worth, I agree with almost all of Morgenthaler's recipes and recommendations, except, perhaps, on how to make limoncello. So far I've had great success with LimoncelloQuest's recipe instead, which uses a microplane to avoid getting ANY pith in the infusion at all. But I'm also deeply curious about the semi-mystical lemon hanging technique/recipe, which I plan to try when I'm next gifted huge quantities of citrus.
posted by kalessin at 3:04 PM on November 16, 2015 [4 favorites]


Also, FYI, I likely won't get to packaging up and shipping part 2 until Wednesday or Thursday of this week. But it should be soon, and I hope you'll get it before the ThanksHoliday. :)
posted by kalessin at 3:07 PM on November 16, 2015


I put my quonsee's package in the mail today!
posted by bile and syntax at 6:03 PM on November 16, 2015 [3 favorites]


I've found my quonsee's present, and will have it mailed on Wednesday!
posted by thomas j wise at 6:46 PM on November 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


My gift arrived today! It was such a pleasant surprise and brightened up my workday. It was way earlier than expected too! I love all of it, especially the necklace! My SQ has chosen to stay anonymous, but if you're reading, thanks!

As for my quonsee, I've chosen part of the gift. I won't be able to ship anything until later, but it will be by the deadline, so don't worry!
posted by bookwibble at 6:55 PM on November 16, 2015 [4 favorites]


I swear, after over-thinking the hell out of this for days, and then giving myself a good talking to, and then going back to basics, re-reading their likes and dislikes thingy, and then googling for the umpteenth time, and stumbling over something that I hope my quonsee likes because it combines so many of their interests... pushing that 'click to buy' button still felt like proposing to someone I'd never met.

Terrifying.
posted by malibustacey9999 at 2:48 AM on November 17, 2015 [27 favorites]


My gift was due to arrive at my quonsee's door yesterday, but now tracking just says "Delivery status not updated". Fingers crossed it didn't get lost somewhere.
posted by cozenedindigo at 7:16 AM on November 17, 2015


I was really inspired by my SQ (we both made the same very simple but very specific request!) so I feel pretty good about my gift, especially the handmade part that started as just a little thing but took on a life of its own. I just need to box everything up* and mail it, but it will have to wait until Wednesday or Thursday. I really hope my SQ like their gift!

*Of course I don't have any good boxes around.
posted by Room 641-A at 8:18 AM on November 17, 2015 [1 favorite]


Just an FYI for my quonsar: my address is a UPS store where my husband and I get packages delivered, and sometimes we don't get there for a couple of days. So if your tracking says delivered and I haven't said that I got the package, don't worry; it's just waiting at the UPS store for one of us to go fetch it. (This has caused some consternation in other swaps, which is why I mention it.)
posted by holborne at 9:47 AM on November 17, 2015


Me too, holborne. So same to my quonsar; if you have shipped and are worried that I haven't said anything, I probably haven't gone to get my mail in a few days. It is safe, and waiting for me.

Still assembling just the right stuff for my quonsee. Not helped by washing machine weather, because I don't want to leave the house!
posted by monopas at 10:11 AM on November 17, 2015 [1 favorite]


Don't forget to check your email box to see if you've gotten an email from us on behalf of your quonsar: there are questions waiting to be answered so quonsars can get their gift on!
posted by julen at 1:10 PM on November 17, 2015 [1 favorite]


My first Quonsmas! So fun coming home to find a mystery gift had arrived! And how freaking cute is it?!! I'll think fondly of internet holiday magic with every iced coffee. So, all the time. Thanks, Zephyrial!!

Even more psyched to send out my gift now, hopefully later this week. Happy Quons-ing, all!
posted by shepard at 7:37 PM on November 17, 2015 [6 favorites]


I have an unexpected parcel slip so lovely Quonsar, if you have posted mine already (who are you amazingly organised people!? Heh.), I will be heading to the sorting office on Saturday.

(Lovely Quonsee, your parcel will be going out soon!)
posted by halcyonday at 1:51 AM on November 18, 2015


My quonsing skills are slowly improving. I feel really good about the gift I just shipped (and slightly guilty in retrospect about the kinda lame gift I sent during my first Quonsmas ever*). Canadian Quonsee, your gift should be arriving next week!

MERRY QUONSMAS**, EVERYONE!

*For real though, first time Quonsers, it IS the thought that counts. Welcome to Quonsmas!!
**My wife got really confused last night because she heard Quonsmas as Kwanzmaas, and asked me if I was trying to say Kwanzaa.

posted by duffell at 10:33 AM on November 18, 2015 [1 favorite]


I shipped my Quonsar package today and it's scheduled to arrive on Monday!
posted by bookmammal at 12:16 PM on November 18, 2015


My quonsee should get her gift today, which is good because based on some recent postings she's been having a shitty week.
posted by Pineapplicious at 12:35 PM on November 18, 2015 [3 favorites]


I just got my Quonsmas gift today! Yummy-looking Portland teas and chocolate treats. I'll be bringing them to the office to be the envy of all (except for the chocolate, which might not make it out of my house). But it didn't have a note, alas! Identify yourself, Oregonian Secret Quonsar, so I can thank you properly! Or I'll have to write the Quonsmas elves for the hook-up. :)

Yay warm Quonsmas fuzzies!
posted by Zephyrial at 4:56 PM on November 18, 2015 [1 favorite]


My quonsee's gift will arrive on Wednesday. I'm all worried now! What if they hate it! I'm assuming this is a normal part of the SQ experience.

Hey that's me! The gift(s) arrived today and are great! I am pleased and exuberant! I am going to stop with the exclamation points now. Thanks for the gadgety gifts! Oh wait that was an extra one oh well.
posted by burnmp3s at 5:24 PM on November 18, 2015 [3 favorites]


I went quonsar shopping today but came away empty-handed.

i told you. i have a headache.
posted by quonsar II: smock fishpants and the temple of foon at 6:18 PM on November 18, 2015 [5 favorites]


my secret quonsar sent me dill pickle cashews!!!!!! i have no idea how they knew what to send, it's a total mystery haha. thank you secret quonsar! i will think of you fondly for the approximate 30-45 seconds it will take me to inhale these. <3
posted by kerning at 7:46 PM on November 18, 2015 [8 favorites]


Oh, Zephyrial, I am your SQ! I typed a note (a festive poem, actually) when I bought your gift online. Sorry it didn't transmit. Cheers!
posted by terooot at 11:06 PM on November 18, 2015 [2 favorites]


I sent my package yesterday and it should arrive on Friday! I did a little something to the outside of the box and the postal worker liked it and showed it to someone else so at the very least I think my SQ will like the box so I'm hoping that behind the keyboard, she is really a cat. No, really, she's a stand-up MeFite and I hope I don't disappoint.
posted by Room 641-A at 3:18 AM on November 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm hitting up my favorite store this afternoon to quonse until the quows quome home! Hooray!
posted by ChuraChura at 6:14 AM on November 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have shipped to my quonsee! NOW WE WAIT. *quakes in anticipation*
posted by bibliogrrl at 6:37 AM on November 19, 2015


I've just received the gift I ordered for my quonsee in the post. Now to wrap up nicely along with a few extras and off it goes! I hope they like it!

It's been been great to have something uncomplicatedly nice to enjoy in these weird, sad times for the world. Thanks Julen and Elves (and Hamsters) :)
posted by Ziggy500 at 7:03 AM on November 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


My quonsee should already have their package!
posted by divabat at 7:30 AM on November 19, 2015


Eeee, my Quonsar package just arrived! I haven't yet decided if I'm going to wait for my wife (nakedmolerats) to get hers so we can open them together or just give in to the temptation to open it now, but it's been a stressfully busy day here today and seeing the package on the doorstep just made everything so much better already.

The front of the box says to open whenever I need some extra cheer; I have a big exam tomorrow so I suspect that may be the day. So excited =)
posted by DingoMutt at 8:15 AM on November 19, 2015 [3 favorites]


dill pickle cashews are a thing. we truly live in the future.
posted by andrewcooke at 9:05 AM on November 19, 2015 [2 favorites]


The package is in the mail! My quonsee should have it by Monday (in theory).
posted by thomas j wise at 9:08 AM on November 19, 2015


A little later than I anticipated, the bottles for the second part of my quonsee's gift are in the dishwasher, and I've set out all the solutions I will be decanting. Need to go into the basement garage to get one more and wait for the dishwasher cycle to complete. After that it's decant, label, package up and ship out, with a note, of course, about what they are and how to use/enjoy them and so on. Probably will go to the P.O. tomorrow for shipping. Hold on to your hats!
posted by kalessin at 9:40 AM on November 19, 2015


We didn't realize it at the time, but me and my partner celebrated Quonsmas by bringing Q-pies to a potluck recently: quiche and quince-apple.
posted by aniola at 11:06 AM on November 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


Apologies if this is in an FAQ somewhere, but is it acceptable to ship items directly from a website to your quonsee? As long as you can mark it as a gift somehow? Meaning they may get a few packages instead of just one?
posted by nakedmolerats at 11:14 AM on November 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


is it acceptable to ship items directly from a website to your quonsee?

I've done this every year I've signed up to quons and it has worked out fine to date. Of course THIS year stupid website is delivering my gifts on two successive weeks so it isn't quite as smooth as I'd like but nonetheless I think this is fine. It is certainly never bad to get MORE than one gift, right?
posted by bearwife at 11:34 AM on November 19, 2015 [2 favorites]


Well after reading my email I starting planning what I would get for my Quonsee and from where ... and then travel happened and I realised that the days at home between now and the 2nd of December are not really going to happen so went out and tried to find all the awesome today. And posted a parcel from the Vatican City.
A parcel from the Holy See counts for something, right?
(don't worry, I tried to make sure said parcel had cool stuff in it)
posted by Megami at 11:56 AM on November 19, 2015 [4 favorites]


A parcel from the Holy See counts for something, right?
(don't worry, I tried to make sure said parcel had cool stuff in it)


Turns out the Pope doesn't shit in the woods.
posted by Etrigan at 11:58 AM on November 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


I received a could-not-be-more-perfect book from my quonsar, griphus, yesterday! I belly-laughed and startled my pets with my delight.
I have in turn placed the order for my quonsee just this afternoon, all should arrive by the 24th.

The cycle of quonse is complete!
posted by ApathyGirl at 12:35 PM on November 19, 2015 [5 favorites]


Ooh, ooh--obol sent me a fancy chocolate bar, a bottle opener shaped like a fish, several awesome local postcards and a piece of fancy local cheese that is, wait for it, rubbed with coffee and lavender. Thank you so much--this stuff is great.
posted by box at 12:58 PM on November 19, 2015 [5 favorites]


I have purchased my quonsee gifts, and am waiting for them to arrive. Then, I shall add some other things to the package and ship it off! December will be quickly upon us...
posted by needlegrrl at 1:03 PM on November 19, 2015


ApathyGirl - I can attest that Griphus is the BEST at quonsing, he gave me my favorite earrings EVER 2 years ago.

THE MOSSSTTT WONDERFFUULL TIMMEEEE OFFFF THE YEARRRRRR
posted by bibliogrrl at 2:16 PM on November 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


Wow! How did my Quonsar know?!?! Oh yeah, they did some detective work from my posts and totally found the way to the Heart of Kinsey's Quonsmas. I'm so excited to explore this book - and it was on my Amazon wish list!

BUT WAIT! THAT'S NOT ALL!! My Quonsar also happened to come across a video they thought I'd like and passed it on through the Quonsmas elves. It was an awesome video, and it made me smile and be grateful about all kinds of things on an otherwise stressful day.

So yay - thank you so much secret and fabulous quonsar!!!
posted by kinsey at 3:49 PM on November 19, 2015 [4 favorites]


Mailed! This is my first Quonsmas and I had a lot more fun than I had anticipated picking things out, shaking down a former student for a discount to fit within the limit and making barely-educated guesses about what my Quonsee might like.

I forgot to factor in shipping in the gift limit, which I hope does not make me a bad person.
posted by charmedimsure at 4:49 PM on November 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


kinsey: yay! I'm glad you liked it! :D I subscribe to the vlogbrothers so when that video came up I was all "hey that's exactly what kinsey is into"
posted by divabat at 5:29 PM on November 19, 2015


Another card from my SQ!! Yay! (And a nice surprise, since I just trudged home with a rotten migraine, and was feeling very pitiful and sorry for myself.)
posted by sarcasticah at 6:19 PM on November 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


part of my quonsee's gift will be arriving here this monday, but I want to include some cookies so I'm going to wait until after the thanksholiday to ship out (probably next monday) for max freshness to avoid post office closures.
posted by firei at 8:11 PM on November 19, 2015


also: charmedimsure, I don't think there's a hard and fast rule as to whether the shipping is supposed to count in the gift range dollar amount or not. I typically don't count it in the gift range, but I know others do!
posted by firei at 8:13 PM on November 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


Aravis76! Thank you so much for the Ursula le Guin book! everyone keeps telling me to read her but I haven't yet so thank you for jumpstarting that.

My parents kept asking me if I had bought something online, haha.
posted by divabat at 10:05 PM on November 19, 2015 [2 favorites]


Yay, it arrived! I'm so glad. A few other tiny bits and pieces should be arriving in the mail, so I hope your parents aren't too startled.
posted by Aravis76 at 11:32 PM on November 19, 2015


First Quonsmas here... reading all this I'm double stressing:
1) I don't think I gave my Quonsar enough information about me (each day since I submitted my info, I think of something & think "Oh, it would have been a good idea to share that about myself")
2) I feel like I have enough info about my Quonsee, but I'm still afraid to get the wrong item, or too many items, but none remarkable, or even one great item, but then find out they already have it.

Still fun, but stressed all the same.
posted by Laura in Canada at 1:28 PM on November 20, 2015 [4 favorites]


I have quonsed my second package out - the USPS says it'll arrive at OntologicalPuppy's by Monday!
posted by kalessin at 2:45 PM on November 20, 2015



There are many ways to do secret quonsar, and almost all of them are right! It's harder to truly screw up at secret quonsaring than it seems. You don't have to sculpt Stonehenge being devoured by giant squirrels out of artisanly-crafted toast to do this well. A small gift that says "I think you'll like this." or "I really like this and I hope you will to" or "I notice you like X, and I hope this falls in that arena of delight" is the ideal secret quonsar gift.

Most recipients are happy to get a small jolt of gift-joy in the mail, so you are already ahead. If they already have it: Great! You got something good for them. Chance just beat you to it. If it's not remarkable, it could still be delightful or useful or functional or tasty or just right for them. Sometimes folks do misfire and send a gift that lands with an unintended clang. It's OK. It happens sometimes even when both parties act with the best intentions. Most most folks will take a present in the spirit intended.

I always say "Do the best you can in the bandwidth/circumstances you have," except I usually phrase it much more eloquently (shhh. Let me have my illusions.) Sometimes that means you have the makings for a cigar box banjo in your garage or happen to know the name of a book your quonsee asked about in an 8 year old unanswered AskMe. Sometimes that means you don't know anything about a person's areas of interest, and so you make your best guess at something that will go over well. Sometimes that means that your standard makes-most-folks-happy skills->gifts won't work out with this particular person and you have to scramble to come up with something else. These are all acceptable ways to quons.
posted by julen at 3:43 PM on November 20, 2015 [15 favorites]


Mailed my package out during my lunch break today! Should be there on Friday next week. Somebody should hopefully have a post-Thanksgiving surprise. :D
posted by lucy.jakobs at 4:18 PM on November 20, 2015


I have been way overthinking this...I think it's just the sheer number of farmer's markets/craft shows/small-shop roundups that have made me so uncertain of what to get my quansee!!
posted by Marinara at 8:07 PM on November 20, 2015 [1 favorite]


And the second present from my quonsar - a stamp that says "from the desk of [divabat]". BRB STAMPING ON EVERYTHING
posted by divabat at 10:32 PM on November 20, 2015 [18 favorites]


Ohhhh, secret quonsar who sent me 6 different green writing instruments. I LOVE them. They are different than any that I already own. They are all in my favorite color. I will be enjoying lots of fun pen testing in the days to come.

In short: they are awesome. You are awesome for having sent them.

Thank you!
posted by pril at 11:07 PM on November 20, 2015 [2 favorites]


Bile and Syntax, thank you so much for the parcel! I discovered it this evening when my pizza arrived--our delivery people have inexplicably taken to hiding parcels, of late, so it was tucked between a bush and the house and was...slightly wet. Which makes me think that it'd been there for more than just an afternoon, so my apologies if this is a tardy note.

It was also, sort of strangely, covered in spiders. Three impressively leggy ones were hanging out atop the package, and then on my way back inside, balancing pizza atop the now-despidered quonsmas package, another friendly spider dropped off the doorframe and into my head, hoping to see what you'd sent.

I killed him. Fuck you, spider, this is MY quonsing. Excitingly, there were no spiders in it, and instead of spiders, I got my favorite mug, which has ridiculous animals wearing clothing on it, and delicious tea, and chocolate that I'm eating literally as I type this. The spice blends look *amazing*, and I'm super excited to experiment with them this week. I really, really appreciate how considerate you were about allergens, and am delighted by everything you sent. Thank you!
posted by MeghanC at 1:58 AM on November 21, 2015 [19 favorites]


I received a postcard from my SQ yesterday! AAH! How fun! I can't wait for what comes next!
posted by meggan at 8:13 AM on November 21, 2015


My secret quonsar's gift departed the sorting facility in Nassau, NY, this morning at 1:19, on its way to Houston. I've never done secret quonsar before, and I am so excited, hoping she likes it.
posted by not that girl at 8:21 AM on November 21, 2015


AHH MINE WAS DELIVERED TO MY QUONSEE TODAY OMG
posted by bibliogrrl at 8:31 AM on November 21, 2015 [5 favorites]


MeghanC, I'm so glad you like the package! Reading your post this morning has made my day!
posted by bile and syntax at 9:10 AM on November 21, 2015 [3 favorites]


What is best practice for putting your quonsee's package in the mail? Do most people get some kind of tracking to make sure it's delivered OK?
posted by mostly vowels at 9:19 AM on November 21, 2015


is it acceptable to ship items directly from a website to your quonsee?

This is the way I always do it. : )

I have a few ideas for my quonsee, but I haven't bought anything yet.
posted by SisterHavana at 10:54 AM on November 21, 2015


MeghanC: another friendly spider dropped off the doorframe and into my head

To be fair, you are usually covered in various animals. The spider probably assumed it was cool.
posted by Room 641-A at 1:20 PM on November 21, 2015 [3 favorites]


Oh yay!! I don't know how you did it, quercus23, but you got me the one rainbow cake I didn't have! Thank you SO much!! I look forward to part 2!!!
posted by PorcineWithMe at 2:34 PM on November 21, 2015 [4 favorites]


The stress of the first Quonsar! I thought once I assembled everything and got the package shipped all would be well, but there's been no tracking update all day AND I've taken to fretting that the liquid contents are not staying contained and are defiling the other bits and bobs in the package. ack!
posted by jenquat at 11:30 PM on November 21, 2015


Thanks PorcineWithMe - I wanted to send something that would get there a bit earlier, and I'm very glad it was the right cake, I just thought 'ooh, shiny' really.
posted by quercus23 at 2:52 AM on November 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Quercus23, I have - seriously, no shit- at least 50 rainbow cakes. I tried it out last night and it's beautifully glimmery. Thanks again!
posted by PorcineWithMe at 3:26 AM on November 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Based on context I'm reasonably sure this is not what you mean but this is what I'm picturing nonetheless.
posted by phunniemee at 7:00 AM on November 22, 2015 [6 favorites]


LOL! That would be nice too! More like face painting rainbow cake - just as fun, a lot less calories!
posted by PorcineWithMe at 10:46 AM on November 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


Oh my god. My secret quonser sent me the cutest fucking note EVER! I'm so excited, it's like I've already been quonsed!
posted by Sophie1 at 2:26 PM on November 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


I finally sent my quonsar gift! Used pretty much the entire budget on one nice thing, so I'm really hoping she likes it. (Also hoping that is an Acceptable Way to Quonse. My quonsee seems pretty great, so I really want to do this as well as I can.)

....and of course now I've quit panickily procrastinating, I can hang out here with you guys and bask in the contact joy! I totally burst out physically laughing at MeghanC's post, too. :D
posted by sciatrix at 3:57 PM on November 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Why is it taking so long for the gift I sent to arrive? Did something happen to it? Is my quonsee out of town? I refresh this thread obsessively, but nothing.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 4:38 PM on November 22, 2015


All my mailed SQ gifts have arrived at SQee's home. Hoping like mad that my quonsee posts their reaction here soon!
posted by bearwife at 4:39 PM on November 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Ye who provided sparse guidance in the way of Quonsgifting shall tomorrow be mailed an assortment of (questionably) useful items from one Cliff's Variety.

Langoliers 11:22

posted by Munching Langolier at 5:05 PM on November 22, 2015 [6 favorites]


Burnmp3s, so glad you liked your gifts! YAY!
posted by ilovewinter at 8:07 PM on November 22, 2015


I got my gift last week! The UPS tracking says it delivered Thursday I think? It got stuck in the mailroom at the restaurant below my apartment which is frustrating. Anyway, I just opened it today and it's a Wonder Woman throw with sleeves!

This is awesome on multiple levels:

1) It's getting cold where I live and my apartment is always freezing even with the radiator cranked high

2) I had a really bad week last week between family drama and general rudeness from strangers and was feeling pretty downtrodden. A Wonder Woman throw is just what I needed - I feel like a badass wearing it (even though I also look kinda dorky). Channeling Wonder Woman will be my new thing the next time some rando on the street calls me fat, or my (half)brother's girlfriend throws a hissy fit that my (half)brother's mom considers me her daughter and cares about my wellbeing. The girlfriend apparently can't deal with not being the center of attention at all times in a relationship, even among her SO's family. Anyway, fuck that. I'm Wonder Woman! :D :D :D

Thank you to my Secret Quonsar, so much! I know your real name from the card but if you'd like to out yourself with your username (either here or through MeMail) it'll be nice to connect the gift to the Mefi handle, as it were.

Thanks again, for real. Opening the gift and seeing Wonder Woman made me so happy. The timing couldn't have been more perfect. :)
posted by thereemix at 8:15 PM on November 22, 2015 [11 favorites]


Oh dear, USPS tracking says the package was delivered! I hope it arrived with all its bits intact. (and that it's liked!)
posted by kalessin at 9:08 AM on November 23, 2015 [1 favorite]


It is from me, thereemix! You are Wonder Woman! And, I'm so very glad you like the gift. I ordered it before your Ask but was really happy knowing you'd get it soon after your very bad day (I even commented on this up above).
posted by Pineapplicious at 9:49 AM on November 23, 2015 [3 favorites]


Thank you Pineapplicious! *hugs*
posted by thereemix at 11:11 AM on November 23, 2015 [3 favorites]


I HAVE BEEN QUONSED. And OH MAN did Twicketface take care of me. LOOK AT THIS SPICY BOUNTY. And a mix CD! THIS IS AWESOME.

Thank you!! I will nom and nom again, and listen to the mix, and be SUPER STOKED.

PRESENTS FROM THE INTERNET ARE THE BEST.
posted by bibliogrrl at 11:18 AM on November 23, 2015 [3 favorites]


bibliogrrl sent me: a chicago magnet [which kept the kids occupied while i unwrapped]: a brite and beautiful hand knit shawl (worn immediately) and beans. homemade dilly beans that are not to be opened until 11/25. beans that taunt me as they sit on the counter as i overthink whether to share them over thanksgiving or just eat them all in one sitting at 12:01 am on wednesday morning. the answer to this SHOULD I EAT THIS is yes. yes i should.
posted by deadcrow at 11:56 AM on November 23, 2015 [5 favorites]


YAY! deadcrow, I am so glad you like. I hope the shawl keeps you toasty warm all winter.
posted by bibliogrrl at 12:41 PM on November 23, 2015


I am off to the post office this very minute with my box of (hopefully delightful) Quonsmas cheer! Let the anxious waiting begin!!
posted by Dorinda at 12:44 PM on November 23, 2015 [1 favorite]


Package shipped off this morning - it should arrive Friday. I hope you like it, Quonsee!
posted by insectosaurus at 12:52 PM on November 23, 2015


look i just need to say that i am vaguely concerned about the number of people who're pretty into the idea of me being covered in spiders
posted by MeghanC at 1:37 PM on November 23, 2015 [8 favorites]


Just shipped to my quonsee!
posted by ocherdraco at 2:05 PM on November 23, 2015


Woot. Maine Maple Champagne Mustard, Wild Blueberry Ginger Jam and a book (The Lobster Coast) I will devour "soon"

Quonsmas is the best. Thanks OntologicalPuppy!

ps: awesome name
pps: I will get mine in the mail Friday or Monday. Depending on how badly I need to escape In-laws on Friday.
posted by DigDoug at 2:20 PM on November 23, 2015 [1 favorite]


You're very welcome DigDoug! I'm glad you enjoy the stuff I picked out for you. That Wild Blueberry Ginger Jam is one of my personal favorite things about living in Maine.

Also, I owe a super huge thank you to kalessin! THANK YOU SO MUCH!

Part II arrived intact today and I'm overwhelmed by it's sheer awesomesauceness. I can only imagine the amount of time, energy and effort that when into all of this. I'll do a follow up post with photos and stuff later once I've wrapped my noodle around everything.

Thanks for being part of the metafilter community kalessin.

This is my first Quonsmas and it has been a fantastic experience.
Quonsmas is truly a magical time of year.
posted by OntologicalPuppy at 3:15 PM on November 23, 2015 [3 favorites]


I'll do a follow up post with photos and stuff later once I've wrapped my noodle around everything.

Honestly! This is a family website!
posted by phunniemee at 3:24 PM on November 23, 2015 [17 favorites]


Thanks! FWIW, the stuff I shared with you was a bunch of small parts of bigger and, yes, high effort projects. But being infusions, they really spend most of the time just sitting around and getting better, so I'm happy to share what I have. And the sips I shared with you so you could get an idea of a newish 1 year old infusion versus a 3 year old one. :) Let me know what you think, OntologicalPuppy!
posted by kalessin at 3:54 PM on November 23, 2015


It's here! It's here! It's here! Oh, Room 641-A, you have outdone yourself!

Everything is seriously gorgeous wrapped in pink and yellow, orange and red. There's these little coffee cup plugs for no-spill commuting, tiny tangerine candies, some coffee that smells rich and heavenly and I can't wait to try it, some vintage rabbit stickers (one set looks German, the other like they're from the 50s), and some soft and bright woolen toys for my dog, Annie. And lots of weekly newspapers! Unwrapped!

What folks can't see in the picture is that the wrapping was vintage bunnies and flowers ALL THE WAY DOWN. The postage box had a big smiling blue rabbit on it and the tags attached to everything inside were pink posies and twine. The gift-wrapped box with the bunny on the front (vintage wallpaper!) opened up to reveal a pink and orange box with another bunny on it. Open that up and there's a smaller box wrapped in paper that's cavorting rabbits on a green field. Open that up and there's a cardboard box with a magician on the front and inside there's ANOTHER BUNNY. And two tiny matchboxes inside filled with those vintage rabbit stickers. I have no idea how long it took you to put all that together, but I marvel.

I am completely delighted and you have brightened my holidays immensely! Thank you, Room 641-A!
posted by mochapickle at 3:58 PM on November 23, 2015 [6 favorites]


My Quonsar sent me a note that is 75% charming and 25% sinister. I can't wait!
posted by donajo at 4:09 PM on November 23, 2015 [3 favorites]


Received a package of tea and the best goat milk caramels straight from the vendor today, and I suspect that my Secret Quonsar is behind it! I mean, I haven't taken Ambien in yoinks and this tea company is new to me so... yeah. 5th of November is such a cool name for a tea; I thought that may have been a clue to your ID and there is a user by that name, but maybe not? I'd love to thank you personally if you care to ID yourself, but if you prefer to lurk in the shadows, do know that my favourite state of being is caffeinated, and I am super thrilled with these additions to my tea stash. I will most certainly brew a cup after I post this comment!
posted by peripathetic at 4:38 PM on November 23, 2015 [2 favorites]


Oh my gosh! Miles Per Flower just sent me an amazing box with THE BEST CARD that not only references my dissertation research, but ALSO Miracle on 34th Street, which is my favorite holiday movie. And it contained: Ladybug Shotglasses! A fused glass magnet he and his daughter made! The Warmth of Other Suns - interesting nonfiction about the Great Migration, which I have been meaning to read but haven't gotten to yet (recommended by both my mother and Ta-Nehisi Coates)! All wrapped in the greatest wrapping paper ever! I am feeling so loved and appreciated - you have made my entire week joyful! Thank you (and your daughter), Miles Per Flower! A+ Quonsing!
posted by ChuraChura at 4:44 PM on November 23, 2015 [6 favorites]


My second postcard showed up today! Getting these postcards almost makes this year's SQ feel like a scavenger hunt (WHICH I LOVE, how did you know!?) and I am now considering stealing this idea for next year's SQ.
posted by meggan at 5:53 PM on November 23, 2015 [2 favorites]


ChuraChura: Yayyy! And whew! So glad you like this, & that you didn't have the Wilkerson book already. It was super fun figuring out what to send you and a little nailbitey too. (She has a freezer full of monkey poop... is monkey-themed wrapping paper a little on the nose?) (Apparently not! Great!)

Secret Quonsar is awesome. Again, thanks to Czars & hamsters for making this happen. I'm grateful to have stumbled on this slithery nest of goodwill.
posted by miles per flower at 7:00 PM on November 23, 2015 [2 favorites]


I just sent my gifts out. It is fun to give!
posted by grumpybear69 at 7:06 PM on November 23, 2015 [1 favorite]


HUGE PROBLEM.

I just got a letter from Malaysian Customs + DHL asking me to pay for the shipping on the book Aravis76 sent me. It's coming up to about RM376++ (> US$88). The book isn't even that much.

I'm going to contact Aravis76 directly but anyone have any tips on this?

EDIT: there's a receipt for the amount. But uh where in the process did someone pay US$88?
posted by divabat at 10:05 PM on November 23, 2015


I am not Aravis76 nor one of the organizers, and this is my first year doing Quonsmas, but I'm going to vote that if your choices are "Paying $88 for your gift" or "Refusing your gift," that refusing your gift is a totally ok quonsmas thing to do.

(I once had to pay US$60-ish for a box of my own sweaters, that I had sent to myself, from the US to Italy, with a customs slip labeled "used clothes." Customs sometimes sucks.)
posted by jaguar at 10:31 PM on November 23, 2015 [4 favorites]


The gift arrived a couple of weeks ago, the Customs letter only just arrived. They didn't arrive together.

Also the customs letter has "receipt" which is confusing the hell out of everyone.
posted by divabat at 10:35 PM on November 23, 2015


Can DHL help? Maybe they did something to "pay" the customs charge?
posted by jaguar at 10:45 PM on November 23, 2015


Dad just came back from customs, and it gets weirder.

So the Customs receipt, which has already been paid for, was for a carton of books (my SQ is generous, but not that generous). The Amazon receipt for SQ's gift was attached, but the Customs receipt itself is linked to a different tracking number.

Apparently there's a known scam where people steal addresses of incoming packages, use that to order packages of contraband material (in this case, probably books banned in Malaysia), and then yoink the stuff at Customs once they're asked to pay. This seems ridiculously convoluted to me (my personal theory is that it's a clerical fuckup somewhere and my address got attached to a receipt that isn't actually mine) but whatever, Dad says Customs is looking into it.

And my SQ is being cooperative about it too, thankooooo, they'll ask Amazon and ask wtf happened.
posted by divabat at 1:27 AM on November 24, 2015


That sounds mighty unorthodox especially when your parcel was likely marked as a gift, and ouch at the exchange rate. I hope it gets sorted out soon!
posted by peripathetic at 1:40 AM on November 24, 2015


Hongkong Post tells me my SQ gift is on its way from the Kowloon GPO to the airport before winging its way across the Pacific! I hope it has more luck than I did when a tropical breeze blew it out of my hands and in my attempt to catch it I stumbled and half-fell into a shrub. AND no customs form was needed so hopefully it'll be straightforward for my Quonsee. divabat, as an international quonsee/er I FEEL you on the customs front! Hope you get it sorted. :)
posted by mdonley at 4:10 AM on November 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


Argh, so sorry for all the hassle, divabat. I have written to Amazon but not yet heard back - I'll let you know as soon as I do. (Obviously, if there is any world in which they end up asking you to pay this crazy amount, memail me and I'll PayPal the amount over or whatever - it's clearly my fuck-up and I should have stuck with the lovely Malaysian shop that does personalised name stamps rather than adding Amazon to the mix).
posted by Aravis76 at 4:54 AM on November 24, 2015


Just ordered my Quonsee's gift! Yipee!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 4:56 AM on November 24, 2015


Mochapickle, I'm so glad you liked everything!

I know I should say it took me days and days but honestly, once I made the first set of stickers it all fell into place. (The only things I purchased for your gift were the coffee and the candy.) I miss all the old mail art projects and art swaps I participated in, and half the fun of SQ for me is wrapping up the gift.

I had a blast putting it all together and so I'm glad you enjoyed it! Happy Quonsmas :D
posted by Room 641-A at 5:03 AM on November 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


To clarify, I didn't end up having to pay that amount, the receipt says it's been paid off - just not sure what the shenanigans are.
posted by divabat at 5:09 AM on November 24, 2015



Wow!

Ordinarily, I'm fascinated by the way people try to game and screw with the system, but dang! I'm glad it's a combination of screwup and obvious-to-customs fraud etc and you are not on the hook, but it's not a very quonsaresque feeling to be staring down at a ridiculous bill.

Again, wow!
posted by julen at 6:06 AM on November 24, 2015


My quonsar gift arrived yesterday, seemingly just when I needed it the most. My quonsar sent me Step Aside, Pops, local popcorn (!!!!!!!) and the BIGGEST BUTTERIEST CARAMELS ever. Kate Beaton is probably my all-time favorite comic artist. My dentist will not be pleased, but I am so grateful from the bottom of my 3-sizes-larger grinchy heart. Thank you thank you thank you!
posted by specialagentwebb at 6:57 AM on November 24, 2015 [2 favorites]


I am anxious as the etsy item I ordered shows no movement for 3 days, and I was really hoping it would be close to being delivered, so that I can put my Quonsee's package together.

Keeping fingers crossed that it updates soon. Maybe I will send a postcard tomorrow with a note, just in case!
posted by needlegrrl at 7:27 AM on November 24, 2015


I have just popped my SQ gift into the post! Such an exciting feeling. I hope that my quonsee excuses my total lack of giftwrapping skill.
posted by Ziggy500 at 8:51 AM on November 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


Many thanks to diagonalized! I have a project going on that will be made MUCH EASIER by the clips, and I had honestly just been thinking that I needed a new seam ripper. And the sour gummies are perfect. Thank you thank you thank you!
posted by The Elusive Architeuthis at 9:21 AM on November 24, 2015


My quonsee's package was sent last Friday and arrived in and left Oregon yesterday. Not very exciting. Apparantly I chose "glacial" for method.

After all of the photos I am starting to feel a little bad about not wrapping all the things, unless you consider Ziploc freezer bags gift wrap. No moisture shall pass!
posted by monopas at 10:42 AM on November 24, 2015


I didn't wrap any of my 2nd batch of things, and the first thing was only wrapped because I asked Amazon to wrap it. :)
posted by kalessin at 10:53 AM on November 24, 2015 [2 favorites]


Came back today to my most excellent quonsar gift from ApathyGirl - a super-inspiring book on instrument inlay that will lead me to try some on my next instrument build. Plus a little bitty Jayne hat (Firefly) for my quonsar tree. A very thoughtful pair of gifts, thank you ApathyGirl!
posted by BlackPebble at 12:17 PM on November 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


I've been quonsed by DrLith! I received a Zentangle book and pens/pencil/tiles and am so excited to try it out! I'd never heard of Zentangle, but it seems like just the thing for me right now. Thank you!!!
posted by amandi at 2:55 PM on November 24, 2015


WOW! Wow wow wow wow wow!

AND AGAIN I SAY WOW.

Thank you, thank you to jenquat for a truly beyond amazing quonsar gift!

I've been out and about all day so was nervous when I got an email from julen saying my package should have arrived--I had to wait HOURS, like literally THREE WHOLE HOURS before I could get home and check. I am very happy to say everything was there in one piece, especially since the box says PERISHABLE & FRAGILE on the outside, two words which, historically, I have not done well with.

Immediately upon opening the box I was greeted by the lovely, subtle smell of winter. Pull back the first layer of wrapping and...hey! Several years ago I received a gift that smelled like bug poison and made everyone in the house nauseous, which I mentioned in my ocherdraco questionnaire, and jenquat went to great lengths to insure that there wouldn't be a repeat of that experience. #1 Best Smelling Box of the Year! (Even the dog approves!)

Inside I found an amazing array of gifts. We both knew immediately that the thing on the bottom was a triceratops dog costume so I was already making crazy eeeeeeee noises, but patiently sorted through everything on top before getting to that. FIrst was a bottle of homemade ginger syrup! I love ginger, ginger ale, ginger beer, and this smells heavenly. (It tastes wonderful, too! I am right now while writing this sipping a homemade ginger beer--always make sure to have an emergency supply of perrier on hand, folks.)

Next up, a box of homemade brie butter crackers! While answering ocherdraco's list of questions I started rhapsodizing about brie and butter sandwiches (I mean, who among us hasn't been there, amirite?) and jenquat actually made that happen in a transportable form. Is jenquat magic? Experts say yes. These are SO GOOD. The dog approves.

And next, TRICERADOG! I have stared at this costume longingly for years, even before I got a dog of my own, being a product that combines two of the things I love the most, dogs and putting clothes on dogs dinosaurs, but never actually bought. Why? I don't know, I honestly don't know. And finally, a pretty little wrapped box! With a vintage Girl Scout First Aid kit inside!!! So flippin cool, you guys! This will find a welcome home next to my 1947 copy of the Girl Scout Handbook.

jenquat, you managed to fill this box with everything me. Like, seriously, if I were tasked with filling a box that could explain who I am to a total stranger, it would be exactly this with very few other additions. I don't know how you did it, but I'm incredibly touched and impressed and can't stop eating these amazingly delicious crackers. Thank you!
posted by phunniemee at 4:09 PM on November 24, 2015 [25 favorites]


I have been merrily Quonsed! A kite to fly in the park near my new apartment! A pair of little NERF guns to shoot at my cat! A package of gorgeous origami papers, and some delightfully unusual pushpins for my cork board! Still-Secret Quonsar, you've made my day!!!! (and caused me to use my entire quota of exclamation points for the week!)
posted by spinturtle at 4:14 PM on November 24, 2015 [2 favorites]


I have half of my SQ gift ready to go, but like firei I'm waiting until Monday to mail everything out, for maximum baking freshness.
posted by spinturtle at 4:16 PM on November 24, 2015


I am starting to feel a little bad about not wrapping all the things

Speaking for myself, I'm an artist and I work with paper. This is basically all I can do besides feed myself. Don't worry about wrapping!

posted by Room 641-A at 5:44 PM on November 24, 2015 [2 favorites]


My box arrived yesterday, but I have not opened it yet. I am in Thanksgiving Hell at the moment, so I may wait until my day off on Saturday, when the depression and rage have subsided a bit.
posted by zorseshoes at 5:58 PM on November 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


My first quonsmas. I was a bit unsure at first because my quonsee's details were rather brief, but after a bit of sleuthing (previous years' thank you posts!) I found something that I hope will go over well. Added a home-made thing, wrapped both, and the package will be in the mail tomorrow morning. I'm now eagerly looking forward to whatever mystery arrives in the mail.
posted by valleys at 6:01 PM on November 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


Also, I feel so awful now that I haven't even begun shopping for my quonsee, but I will, again probably after the holiday has passed. I promise! And I hope she likes what I get. I am so nervous about this!
posted by zorseshoes at 6:02 PM on November 24, 2015


My gifts arrived today, and they are PERFECT: a desk calendar with pictures of super-sekret stealthy planes and a luggage tag with moar planes!

I was so confused as to how my Quonsar knew about my jones, until I searched and found a MetaTalk post. Bravo, Quonsar, you nailed it! PERFECT FIRST SQ!
posted by matrixgeek at 6:07 PM on November 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


Glad you liked it matrixgeek. That metatalk thread was very helpful.
posted by poxandplague at 6:17 PM on November 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you poxandplague! It's brilliant :D
posted by matrixgeek at 6:44 PM on November 24, 2015


I have been Quonsed! My two favorite things-- Booze & Doctor Who! Thank you, Sercret Quonsar. I was filled with delight upon opening your package and seeing the Dalek "IN-TOX-I-CATE" flask. It is now filled with sweet, sweet hooch!
posted by KingEdRa at 7:02 PM on November 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you, bunnysquirrel, for the beautiful hair sticks! I don't have anything like them, and they're just perfect! I love the style and the color and I know I will wear them. Thank you so much!
posted by aabbbiee at 7:53 PM on November 24, 2015 [2 favorites]


zorseshoes, you still have plenty of time before the shipping deadline, so don't sweat it that you haven't shopped yet! Thanksgiving can bring out the crazy in folks (must we work out family disfunction through the language of mashed potatoes?!), so try to breathe through it and remember the magic of Quonsar will brighten your mood...
posted by jenquat at 8:04 PM on November 24, 2015


Yay! A successful first SQ gifting for me! phunniemee, I'm so happy you liked your box of goodies - it really was a pleasure to put it together for you.
posted by jenquat at 8:28 PM on November 24, 2015 [6 favorites]


You're welcome, KingEdRa!
posted by cozenedindigo at 8:29 PM on November 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


You're welcome, aabbbiee! I'm so glad you like them! :) Yay first SQ!
posted by bunnysquirrel at 3:14 AM on November 25, 2015 [1 favorite]


so, this year I made the effort to go out and choose gifts rather than slumming-it. (oh, don't worry, quonsee-meine, you are probably still going to get a double-secret-probation / reverse-requons' from spamazon, mostly-only because I will find it hilarious to do so. but no also because it makes me very happy to do so.)

I even had some nice gold-foil paper and everything!

but.

so.

I had left the gifts at my friend's office at work 'cos the USPS is a 2 minute walk from her campus. and so I was sitting there yesterday wrapping-things like some sort of mad person, hands cramping up in perfect style (apologies quonsee for my childlike-writing and lack of detail.) and then my co-worker and her friend asked WAIT YOU DON'T HAVE ANY RIBBONS??!?

Dear Reader, my two friends HAD RIBBONS!!! (I don't even understand this) - and it was even a lovely color to match the foil. and from a misspent-youth working in a chocolate-store, I actually know how to wrap-things and curl-ribbons. (oh, don't despair, quonsee, there are no chocolates or sugars involved, I promise)

Quonsmas-Miracles Can Happen!
posted by dorian at 4:17 AM on November 25, 2015 [4 favorites]


valleys: I was a bit unsure at first because my quonsee's details were rather brief, but after a bit of sleuthing (previous years' thank you posts!) I found something that I hope will go over well. Added a home-made thing, wrapped both, and the package will be in the mail tomorrow morning. I'm now eagerly looking forward to whatever mystery arrives in the mail.

All of this except my gift is in the mail now, but even that fits, because this was written yesterday, so it's now tomorrow.
posted by Too-Ticky at 9:55 AM on November 25, 2015


I've been quonsed! bookmammal sent me a beautifully-wrapped, custom (I assume) MetaFilter 2015 Secret Quonsmus Pint Glass! And it was filled with the Most Wonderful Chocolate in the World (Andes mints, obvs). Thanks bookmammal!
posted by craven_morhead at 10:17 AM on November 25, 2015 [3 favorites]


So glad you like your gift, craven_morhead! I had a lot of fun figuring out how to "quons" you. (And thanks to pb for kindly and speedily forwarding me the Metafilter logo!)
posted by bookmammal at 11:05 AM on November 25, 2015 [1 favorite]


Secret Quonsar aka dywypi! I have never gotten a Quonsmas gift so early in the month before so I was completely taken by surprise when phunniemee emailed me and said it was waiting in my mailbox. I'll be honest, I kind of have a bad relationship with my mail man but yesterday I could have had a surprise party in his honor I was so excited. I wish so bad I would have taken a picture of all the wrapped gifts but instead I tore through everything super fast. I love everything! The single-malt scotch caramels...oh my gosh...amazing. And those pecans!! I tried to savor them but I sprinkled them on everything I ate yesterday (Salmon, salad, icecream) and on my yogurt and oatmeal this morning. The soap smells so good too! Seriously, like sunshine. And thank you so much for your thoughtful postcard. I've been having one of those months where everything is kind of upside down, and since I got your Quonsmas package everything is looking up. :)
posted by Marinara at 11:13 AM on November 25, 2015 [2 favorites]


Wow, my first Quonsar was an awesome one! My unnamed gift sender hooked me up with Terry Pratchett's Small Gods, a Simpsons LEGO minifigure (Mr. Smithers!) and some sweet-ass New York swag! And each were wrapped separately and opening lots of presents feels extra good.

Thank you, kind anonymous one, for such thoughtful and great gifts!! Best gift swap ever!!
posted by Twicketface at 12:07 PM on November 25, 2015 [2 favorites]


EEEE! I got quonsed! I got some yummy nuts and authentic Texan chili mix all wrapped in a pretty Texas wildflower-theamed tea towel from my awesome Secret Quonsar Beaning! Thank you so much, this is EXACTLY the sort of thing that Quansmas is for. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.
(Part of my Quonsee's present only just arrived, I won't be able to mail it out until Friday, but it will be on on it's way soon).
HAPPY QUONSMAS ONE AND ALL
posted by msali at 12:46 PM on November 25, 2015 [2 favorites]


"Theamed"? Jesus, go home msali, you're drunk.
posted by msali at 1:08 PM on November 25, 2015 [3 favorites]


IMPORTANT DOGCERATOPS UPDATE!
posted by phunniemee at 1:16 PM on November 25, 2015 [28 favorites]


Aw, you're welcome, marinara! Enjoy!
posted by dywypi at 1:17 PM on November 25, 2015


Can we make DOGCERATOPS the Quonsmas mascot, or would that upset the hamsters??
posted by firei at 1:26 PM on November 25, 2015 [2 favorites]


MetaFilter 2015 Secret Quonsmus Pint Glass!

Didn't someone once find an old lunchbox their quonsee had mentioned in a thread? I couldn't find it. It was awesome. Anyway, this is right there up with that one.
posted by Room 641-A at 1:55 PM on November 25, 2015


Do you think the Dogceratops regalia would fit the head of a slightly overweight cat?
posted by ChuraChura at 2:07 PM on November 25, 2015 [2 favorites]


This one says medium so I'm confident the small would work for your cat!
posted by phunniemee at 2:26 PM on November 25, 2015 [1 favorite]


There is also this lovely number which goes down to extra small if you have a smaller Tricatatops.
posted by sciatrix at 2:29 PM on November 25, 2015


phunniemee für vielen Gründen, THE-SPECIAL-HELL.
posted by dorian at 2:32 PM on November 25, 2015


I posted out my packages today.

I no longer feel shabby.

Now begins the long wait of ... 'will it arrive okay.?' And 'will they like it?'.

That special delicious anxiousness that only quonsaring can bring :)
posted by Faintdreams at 4:43 PM on November 25, 2015 [1 favorite]


ChuraChura, it comes in a variety of sizes... so bring on Catceratops!
posted by jenquat at 4:44 PM on November 25, 2015


I found a box of delicious teas to try on my porch sent by my Quonsar jeri today. Yay! I have already confirmed, for Science, that the ginger is delicious and fabulously unmarred by other favors. Thank you so much! It was a lovely surprise and right up my alley.

It was enough to help me briefly forget that all the snow I was looking forward to skiing and skijoring on over the long weekend has been ruined by rain and appalling 45 degree temperatures. You all just wait here. If you need me, I'll be breathing in some more ginger vapors and letting my tears fall into the mug while compulsively clicking "refresh" on the Wunderground page.
posted by charmedimsure at 7:54 PM on November 25, 2015 [3 favorites]


With much excitement, I mailed my quonsee's (partially hand-made) gift this afternoon! This was a new post office experience for me, as I used the self-service kiosk at my in-laws' local branch (our own branch does not yet, to my knowledge, have such crazy technology). I had carefully written out everything on the box, but the machine spit forth a brilliant white sticker for me to affix, which I was to place over the already-written delivery address. I stupidly realized only after the fact that I should have written the name of my quonsee in large, friendly letters in the blank box on that sticker. I hope (oh, how I hope) that the package will arrive safely, but should there be trouble, dear quonsElves, I do have a tracking number that could be used to determine the many travels, near and far, of the little brown box so patiently awaited. Sending good wishes out into the universe that the poorly addressed package makes its way to its intended recipient without much trouble or delay.

Now to sleep off this too-much-pinot-noir buzz, and then to run a 5K on the morning of giving thanks. But while the buzz is still here, let me say once again how much I love this community and the quonsing season. You are all fantastic humans, and I wish I knew more of you (all of you) better.
posted by cellar door at 8:17 PM on November 25, 2015 [3 favorites]


Can we make DOGCERATOPS the Quonsmas mascot, or would that upset the hamsters??

The spokesman for the Hamsters' spokesman has informed me that that the Hamsters would not lower themselves to become a mascot. I restrained myself - barely - from making the obvious joke.
posted by julen at 4:43 AM on November 26, 2015 [6 favorites]


dogceratops -> catceratops -> sleep-murder.
posted by dorian at 5:26 AM on November 26, 2015


I've been so overwhelmed with my own quonsee's gift that I completely forgot I was due to receive a parcel of my own! Thank you, anonymous quonsar, for the lovely collection of crafting goodness! I will definitely be putting every bit into use - the Christmas stamp is just in time for some card making. Thank you again so much! (My quonsee will have to continue waiting patiently, as one part of their gift required replacing when it arrived damaged, and the main crafted bit is going to take me right down to the posting deadline wire due to flu last week and general life stuff getting in the way. Sorry, dear quonsee!)
posted by catch as catch can at 5:26 AM on November 26, 2015 [3 favorites]


I was well and truly Quonsed on Monday. I apologize for the delay in posting this thank you - I started a new job Monday and it came with a two-hour-each-way commute.

Thank you so much, charmedimsure, for the lovely, wrapped gifts. I got some great tiles and pens for my Zentangle addiction, along with some Alaska-themed items: a great octopus t-shirt, a fun native art inspired coloring book and a smashed penny for my collection. It was a accompanied by a beautiful letterpress card.

Thank you, thank you, charmedimsure, you are officially a great Quonsar!
posted by Altomentis at 10:49 AM on November 26, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have just come home to a fantastic quonsar gift and it has made me very happy. I've been quite ill recently and am slowly recovering, so this cheered me up a lot.

My anonymous Quonsar got me some delicious dark chocolates (amazing) and some very classy looking pencils with Hitchikers and Dr Who quotes on them all wrapped in retro robot wrapping paper. I am very fond of retro style tin robot pictures (not actual tin robots, only pictures of them) and this is the wrapping paper that people who know me well would choose. So, super impressive work Quonsar, super impressive!
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 12:03 PM on November 26, 2015 [3 favorites]


I mailed my thing yesterday, and my person should get it on Saturday. I hope he opens it while eating a turkey sandwich.
posted by box at 12:08 PM on November 26, 2015


Yay Just this guy, y'know that was me!!! So glad you liked them. You didn't actually mention Dr Who or Hitchhikers Guide in your questionnaire, but I have actually participated alongside you in a Dr Who thread and your username indicated an interest in HHGTTG so I went for it. Glad you liked it, hope you get better soon!
posted by Ziggy500 at 2:37 PM on November 26, 2015 [4 favorites]


In trying to figure out which Dr. Who thread you were in I notice that I at one point relatively recently accused you of being a sockpuppet account that I created unknowingly...
What an odd coincidence.

Anyway, I've finally finished up my comparatively poor Quonsar ready to send.
I feel a bit guilty for receiving mine before I've even posted my gift out.
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 5:03 PM on November 26, 2015 [2 favorites]


Agh! The gift for my Quonsee says it was delivered to me 3 days ago "in/at mailbox" but it's a giant parcel and would not fit so what the hell?! Now I'm worried. I guess I start with interrogating the local post office?
posted by corb at 6:47 PM on November 26, 2015


In case it was me... check first if it's a work address. I received a package at work, I technically dont know for sure it's quonsmas, but havent had a chance to get it yet.
posted by nat at 9:26 PM on November 26, 2015


Just got back from the post office. Somebody's getting quonsed next week!
posted by Skybly at 12:45 AM on November 27, 2015


Thank you to fever-trees who mailed me lovely toddler-made gingerbread! They smelled so good, the dog tried nibbling the paper off (pictured here, sedated after yearly grass seed removal from ear) but they were safe in their container. I just tried one, and the whole Christmassy gingerbread flavour is taking me back to my childhood. I also got blueberries in chocolate and a wombat notebook that has both lined AND blank pages, which which will probably replace my current planning notebook! Thankyou!
posted by quercus23 at 2:00 AM on November 27, 2015 [4 favorites]


Huzzah, hurrah and yippie!

My quansee receive their gift(s) and they loved em.

Yay \o/
posted by Faintdreams at 5:44 AM on November 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


My quonsee's package should have arrived on Wednesday, but I know people travel for the holidays, and nothing should be perishable. I either got him (1) things he needed but didn't know he needed, (2) things he already had, or (3) things he never needed or wanted, and I fail at Quonsmas. The Quonsmas nervousness never goes away....
posted by JMOZ at 7:22 AM on November 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


I just Quonsed. Like, I haven't taken off my coat from going to the PO yet.

Now I'm waiting for two things to happen.

Since I don't dress up for Halloween any more, Secret Quonsar is fast becoming my favorite holiday of the year.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 9:53 AM on November 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have been quonsed, indeed. That mysterious package from work was indeed from my quonsar (either that, or some other kind soul has sent me things..)

I just couldn't manage to go pick it up until today-- and delightful it is indeed! Two sets of desk puzzles- both wooden ones and the twisty nail puzzles that you have to figure out how to take apart (and put back together). I was hoping to post when I'd solve them all-- but one of the wooden ones I can't even figure out how to disassemble.

Good! That means I have more fun puzzling left! (Plus good desk tchotchkes for students and colleagues to play with when they visit my office!)

What a lovely quonsing, inspiring me to get out there and collect the last bits of the package I'm sending soon, so I can quonse in the active voice.
posted by nat at 10:37 AM on November 27, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thank you for my GREAT package, chaoticgood! For various reasons, I hosted Thanksgiving today instead of yesterday, and from my seat at the meal, I saw the mailman drop off a package on our stoop. I thought it might be from my quonsar, and couldn't wait to check. The unfamiliar return address and the funny remark about duct tape confirmed my suspicions, so I explained to my bemused inlaws about presents from the internet.

Naturally, they wanted me to open it. I considered saving it until after I sent off the package for my quonsee... for about 10 seconds. Then, tore in. I enjoyed a card with an Edward Gorey skating alligator, and a wrapped box with a nice assortment of kitchen items that I know I'll use a ton. I'd asked for useful things, and these definitely are. I got a pot clip that holds a drippy spoon over the pot, which makes so much sense. And a nice silicon spoonula that I know I'm going to reach for constantly. And a silicone pot holder shaped to grab a hot handle. (For that one, I had to double-check that I've never posted here about the TWO times I've burned my hand pretty badly on the handle of the pan I use when I make Zuni chicken. Nope, but it's like you knew!) Considering how handy these all are, it's pretty amazing that none duplicate anything I already had -- they're all just the kind of things I'd pick for myself. Thank you very much for an excellent Quonsmas!
posted by daisyace at 2:40 PM on November 27, 2015 [5 favorites]


Oh my goodness. I have been quonsed! With, with, with a bunch of excellent postcards (including one with banana slugs how did you know and one with holographic organs!!) and a flip book of a carnivorous Christmas stocking and a set of teeny little mice that look like the ones I work on! And there are two lovely ornaments for our tiny tree and a splendid set of socks that are even now warming my feet and an excellent t-shirt for when I am feeling particularly misanthropic! Plus there's an intriguing bar of gingerbread chocolate and not one but two lovely sweet notes I'll be saving for my cork wall and even a couple of hand-made dog toys for Tribble! (She isn't the only one who appreciates them, either, but fortunately she got them back from Peter in the end. Ha!) I mean, look at all of this abundance!

Thank you so much, Altomentis! (And monopas, who helped.)
posted by sciatrix at 2:52 PM on November 27, 2015 [4 favorites]


Thank you, cellar door, I love the gifts! The hat is amazing, the candy is tasty and I'm happy to have more awesome tea. :) And everything was wrapped up so nicely! Now I just have to mail out my Quonsee's gift this weekend, and the Circle of Quonsing will be complete.
posted by jet_pack_in_a_can at 5:57 PM on November 27, 2015 [2 favorites]


Hooray! I am so glad that the USPS managed to see past my idiocy. And that you liked the things! (And that I had an excuse to knit something fun.) You know, I saw that tea on the shelf, and said to myself, "Ooh, look at that, a coconut chai, just like jet_pack_in_a_can likes!" And only afterwards did I realize that it was, in fact, the same exact one that you'd mentioned. (At least, I think. They had a green tea version, as well.) I was sorry to not be original, but happy to be able to give something I knew you'd like. :)
posted by cellar door at 7:12 PM on November 27, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm so glad you like it Nat! I do apologise for the lack of personalisation, I just wasn't confident it would make it from Aus to you if I bought it here, at least not before Christmas.
posted by smoke at 11:44 PM on November 27, 2015


Just gotta find an actual box, expecting to shipping out goodies bright & early Monday!
posted by easily confused at 6:27 AM on November 28, 2015


Mine came late yesterday and I truly LOVE it. Thank you so much, sciatrix, I'm amazed that you could pick out such a perfect gift for a total stranger. You have mad Quonsmas skillz!
posted by raisingsand at 9:22 AM on November 28, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thank you to my anonymous quonsar for the adorable knights and dragons umbrella, which came today! And it's grey and drizzly in London so I cannot wait to take it out and show it off!
posted by Ziggy500 at 12:57 PM on November 28, 2015 [1 favorite]


I was not eating a turkey sandwich, but I'm overwhelmed by the giant box of awesome I received from (wait for it) box. Or, box's Box of Awesome, if you prefer.

It contained a huge pile of great things (local products from Arkansas and others accumulated over travels), coffee, soap, a t-shirt from a music festival, a bottle opener, stickers, buttons, etc.... Thanks for this awesomeness! I love everything you sent.

I feel like I should send my quonsee an apology for not being nearly as great as my quonsarer (quonsar? quonser? quonsor?) Sorry!
posted by JMOZ at 1:39 PM on November 28, 2015 [2 favorites]


Just returned from Thanksgiving travels and received mine! More posts to follow but it was a great surprise to get in the mail. :)
posted by lucy.jakobs at 2:02 PM on November 28, 2015 [1 favorite]


Alright! Package for my Quonsee has finally been assembled! Post office, here we come!
posted by corb at 2:49 PM on November 28, 2015 [1 favorite]


I got mine finally finished and posted today after many hoops to leap through.

I was just wondering about the quonsing link in terms of a network graph. Like, if you plotted a sender and receiver on a piece of paper and then added another link between the receiver and their quonsee eventually you would have a closed loop, you'd have to get back to the start I think?

The question is, how many loops are there?
1 per group?
Or will the international group members receive gifts from local group members making the groups part of the same loop?
there might be multiple smaller loops per group even.

Does this make sense?
Of course the node/link ratio of 1:1 is confounded slightly by second chancers and so on.
I wonder what the graph of actual gifts sent and received vs original plan is.
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 3:06 PM on November 28, 2015 [2 favorites]


Nolechick11 hooked me up with an excellent package of local treats and fun stuff. Thank you so much Nolechick11!! :) She said it's up to me if I want to share... we'll see about that. I am quite filled with Quonsmas cheer!

My patient recipient won't have to wait too much longer to receive my gift. Hang in there, mystery Quonsee!! I will ship by Tuesday at the latest!!
posted by hansbrough at 3:26 PM on November 28, 2015


Hello, did anyone from here send coffee beans to me? I think I wrote in the wishes-and-info field that I mostly buy everyday boring beans from the local grocery store. Yesterday, a bag of of "Divino Niño" Costa Rica beans showed up in the mail, directly from the roastery with no other information about the sender. If you are among us, thank you so much! It's delicious and I'm in the middle of my second cup for the day.
posted by Herr Zebrurka at 3:33 PM on November 28, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you, Itaxpica! I am very starry-eyed at the tea extravaganza you sent my way. I love genmaicha! and sencha! and jasmine! Curious to try out the fruit & black teas as well. Now I am assured I have enough tea to last the winter. :)
posted by ilicet at 4:18 PM on November 28, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm so happy you liked the stuff, JMOZ!
posted by box at 5:35 PM on November 28, 2015


I was just wondering about the quonsing link in terms of a network graph. Like, if you plotted a sender and receiver on a piece of paper and then added another link between the receiver and their quonsee eventually you would have a closed loop, you'd have to get back to the start I think?

The question is, how many loops are there?
1 per group?
Or will the international group members receive gifts from local group members making the groups part of the same loop?
there might be multiple smaller loops per group even.


For smaller swap groups (under 15 people), it's almost always one big loop. Sometimes it happens to work out to be two loops for the groups in the 10-20 person range. As a swap group gets larger, the possibilities of multiple subgroups in a loop get better. It's only when groups start getting large - like say, more than 50 people, you are almost guaranteed to have multiple loops. Some are big and some are small, but the randomization factor makes it far likelier that you end up with several small loops.

Second chancers add a weird variable because most second chancers also participated in the initial swap, and so they occupy 1.5 nodes when all is said and done (2 Sends, but only 1 receive). You also end up with people who are a full 1 (both send and receive) but whose send is interrupted (e.g because of a missing/stolen package). So you have a broken loop, and the second chancer patch heals one fractured end, and becomes stuck to the side of an independent loop. It'd look super weird to graph it, and probably I'm breaking all sorts of actual mathematical precepts and depiction in my answer (sorry MeFite Mathematicians!).
posted by julen at 7:05 PM on November 28, 2015 [3 favorites]


Today I got a GORGEOUS silk scarf with all my favorite colors on it from a Mefite who didn't include their username! Thank you, mysterious person!

Life has gotten in the way of being timely about my Quonsee's gift, but tomorrow I shall brave Thanksgiving Sunday shopping at Pike Place for them.
posted by Mizu at 8:22 PM on November 28, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oh wait look! I got a message telling me it was from julen, just shipped directly from the vendor. Thank you, julen! It's beautiful! I'm really bad at checking my email!
posted by Mizu at 8:28 PM on November 28, 2015 [2 favorites]


Unless, wait, maybe just the email telling me about it was from julen organizing things and it is STILL from someone anonymous! Oh well I am confused but well-accessorized.
posted by Mizu at 8:30 PM on November 28, 2015 [2 favorites]


No, your quonsar is still anonymous, Mizu!

I have not yet mailed out my package. I always mail it on the last day for a variety of reasons (ranging from flexibility in running the swap and dealing with assorted issues to plain ol' laziness), so many of you are not alone. I have no idea if I have wrapping paper, ribbon, tape, or a box of an appropriate size. I do have a metric ton of cat hair and a solid reputation with the local post office for being just a slight bit off, so I have that going for me.
posted by julen at 8:39 PM on November 28, 2015 [4 favorites]


Little did I know as I repeatedly checked this thread to see if my quonsee liked the gifts I sent that my quonsar experience was winging toward me, arrayed in awesomeness! Thank you so much, Dorinda!!

So, first there was the really wonderful First Ladies wrapping. Then there was the great card. Then there was the awesome package of dog cookies -- in my dog's favorite flavor, cheese!!!! He loves this cookie! Then there was the AWESOME bike bell, which I cannot wait to install on my bike, Electra. Then there was the wonderful, delicious, awe inspiring hot sauce, which is about to be added to almost everything I eat. And last but not least, the wonderful book, which I had never heard of and cannot wait to read.

What a wonderful package !! I am so thrilled mere exclamation points do not express it. Thank you, thank you, Dorinda.
posted by bearwife at 8:46 PM on November 28, 2015 [5 favorites]


So glad you're enjoying the tea, charmedimsure!
posted by jeri at 9:52 PM on November 28, 2015 [1 favorite]


Sent my very first Secret Quonsar package the other day (international) and the clerk at the post office looked askance at my contents list for customs: "7 Quonsars." Then, they actually asked what a quonsar was! I have never ever had a postal clerk ask me to explain what I wrote on the form. Replied "snacks"? And they asked me to write that on the paperwork. And thus the surprise for my quonsee was just slightly deflated.

But, they are awesome snacks.
posted by Gotanda at 12:17 AM on November 29, 2015 [6 favorites]


Oh, I'm so glad the package made it to you and made you smile, bearwife! I had loads of fun putting it together.
The book recently won the Giller Prize, so I'm looking forward to reading it, too! Kenobi is super glad your pooch liked the biscuits, though I'll admit he was rather hesitant to let me wrap them up and send them away. Generosity is not his strongest virtue when it comes to cheesy snacks ;)

Happy Quansmas, one and all!!
posted by Dorinda at 7:54 AM on November 29, 2015 [1 favorite]


I love that so many Quonsmas gifts are actually intended for Mefites' pets. So (wonderfully) typical.
posted by mudpuppie at 10:18 AM on November 29, 2015 [6 favorites]


Received my quonsar gift today.

The most delish super berry teabags.

Thankyou Longbaugh you are lovely.
posted by Faintdreams at 11:59 AM on November 29, 2015 [1 favorite]


Woohoo! I have been quonsed in the most delightful fashion!

crepesofwrath sent me christmas pudding flavoured chocolate, two spice mixes (the whole package smelled great!) and a cute laser cut deer ornament. All wrapped beautifully and with a fun card to boot! Thanks so much, crepesofwrath.

I will mail mine...soon(tm). I am waiting for one more thing in the mail that should arrive tomorrow.
posted by quaking fajita at 12:30 PM on November 29, 2015 [3 favorites]


My gift arrived a few days ago, but what with Thanksgiving goings on, I only got to open it tonight. Thanks so much, monopas! The yarn is lovely, the pins are lovely, the stickers are lovely, the origami paper is lovely, it is all lovely. The funnel and the hook will be put to good use as I'm working on Christmas gifts. And I'm saving the gingerbread chocolate for a treat later in the month when I am overwhelmed by the holiday. I am overwhelmed by how just right it all is.

Quonsar bless us everyone!
posted by donajo at 7:53 PM on November 29, 2015 [2 favorites]


My Quonsee's gift has been ordered! It should ship in the next couple days. I hope they enjoy! : )
posted by SisterHavana at 9:36 PM on November 29, 2015


Yesterday afternoon, as I was reading Metafilter, I heard the mail truck pull up and I just knew my Secret Quonsar was about to come through for me! Sure enough, I received a package with an unfamiliar return address. I ripped it open and found a pretty pink box with a somewhat cryptic message hand-written on it: “Because Survival is Insufficient.” I knew the quote, but I couldn't quite place it and thought briefly that my SQ might be some sort of survivalist. Also attached to the box was a map of northern Michigan – which didn’t correspond with the return address. I think I was too excited about the possible contents in the box to puzzle through the clues on the box, so I quickly opened it and found 3 lovely scented candles, what appeared to be an herb-filled sachet packet, and a couple of rocks – hmmm, more mysteries!

My SQ enclosed a 2 page letter to explain it all, and as it turned out, her clues and gifts were truly perfect. My daughter and I were delighted by the references to Station Eleven and we'll get a lot of use out of our worry stones. Our kitty, Boo Radley, loves his catnip bag and we all love the candles. Thank you Mostly Vowels! This may have been your first year as a Secret Quonsar (mine too!) but your research proves that you’ve already mastered the art of Quonsing!
posted by kbar1 at 11:38 PM on November 29, 2015 [3 favorites]


My QuonsBox is in the mail and should be winging its way Southward today!
posted by kimberussell at 6:33 AM on November 30, 2015


donajo, I'm so glad you liked it all! From my household, you were very easy to shop for. The hook might be magical. I bought one for me too, and have used it for several hours most days since with no pain, making an ugly ugly throw. I haven't crocheted in years, so thank you too.
posted by monopas at 8:57 AM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]


I just sent my secret quonsar! I haven't been following this thread closely and now I'm a little bummed I didn't get more creative with my presentation. BUT I did spend a lot of time agonizing over what would be the right gift while trying to respect the $ limit. I was going to get a gift for my quonee's pets but then completely forgot in my rush to do everything else. So quonsee, please give your pets lots of quonsmas love and kisses from me and my doggies.

Anyway, there is now a package with a homemade treat, a few little Minnesota-made gifts and a super-girly (sorry, but I'm a sucker for bright, colorful markers) card that I doodled while watching TV on its way to sunny California! I hope you like it, Quonsee!
posted by triggerfinger at 9:26 AM on November 30, 2015


So, the parcel is off, and I am super nervous as I have never done Secret Quonsar before and it was harder than I had anticipated. Should be delivered on Thursday.
posted by 15L06 at 10:10 AM on November 30, 2015


I just opened a box with the most gorgeous pink fingerless gloves, which immediately were put to use in keep my hands warm in my chilly office. I plan on making myself a cup of hot tea and putting my little Santa minifigs to use collecting the wishes of their new minifig family.

Thank you Liesl for the lovely note and beautiful gifts.
posted by theBigRedKittyPurrs at 10:23 AM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]


And LEGO wrapping paper! Yay! Thank you!!
posted by theBigRedKittyPurrs at 10:25 AM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]


Just mailed my Quonsparcel. I hope he likes it. I included a couple of small dog treats since he said he has a small dog. But my local dog supply store is sparse on treats for small dogs, except for Greenies. So I included two mini Greenies, but I completely forgot to insert the note saying Hey, Quonsee, I'm not negging on your dog's breath. Oh well. I trust he'll know all this.
posted by ImproviseOrDie at 12:17 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]


omg, I love Food & Wine magazine! Out yourself, secret quonsar! You did a very good thing.
posted by heyho at 12:48 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]


Pieces are in place.
The wrapping is organized
Tonight after work,
I will wrap it up.
And send it to my quonsee.
Far away it goes.
posted by Sophie1 at 12:51 PM on November 30, 2015


Thanks to my quonsar for the second adorable note!
posted by Sophie1 at 12:52 PM on November 30, 2015


I received my Quonsmas gifts today! Thanks so much to capricorn, my nearly-a-neighbor, for the selection of whimsical objects (photo here). The unicorn party picks particularly delight me, and (as you'll see in the second photo) the lid-lifter kitchen gadgets particularly delight my housemate. She decided they needed to supervise her coffee immediately.

Merry Quonsmas to all! My quonsee will be receiving her gifts very soon, as I bought them today. Cue sneaky laughter.
posted by kostia at 12:57 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]


I'm seeing some weirdness in the USPS tracking of my Quonsmas package (the package got rerouted)...hoping to hear from my Quonsee that they received the package tonight, otherwise it may have gone AWOL.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 1:04 PM on November 30, 2015


I provided Munching Langolier approximately ZERO information, because I'm terrible that way sometimes.

And today I opened my Quonsmas package and was ABSOLUTELY DELIGHTED! Noisemakers to delight my children, and chop frills that I suspect will be part of some bizarre craft, and corn holders which are ALWAYS handy (see what I did there?), and chop sticks with koi painted on them that are adorable, and GOOGLY EYES - oh, my poor family, where I plan to stick those googly eyes. *And* a package of "Hummingbird Haven" birdseeds, for which I have the perfect spot in my yard - and resident hummingbirds who will LOVE IT.

Thank you thank you thank you! Monday got much less Monday-like thanks to you!
posted by Lulu's Pink Converse at 1:16 PM on November 30, 2015 [3 favorites]


I mailed my first Quonsar package today! Aaaaaaggghhhh! I hope I did this right! It was really fun!
posted by areaperson at 1:39 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]


I mailed mine out today, and am hoping that the cookies I sent are still good when they get there, as I had to opt for a slower shipping than I would have preferred due to price. :(
posted by firei at 1:57 PM on November 30, 2015


I meant to mail mine out today, but I came down with a horrible cold and stayed home, so it's going tomorrow. Woo!
posted by holborne at 2:03 PM on November 30, 2015


Thank you, theredpen, for I have been quonsed! I let the Wee Baby Palindromic open the gifts as a sort of mini-quons to her. I have hidden the chocolate from her, but she has adopted the honey and Daath Vada magnet as her own.

As for me, I am still awaiting one item that should arrive tomorrow before I can quons my quonsee, but I vow that it will go out before this weekend!
posted by palindromic at 2:27 PM on November 30, 2015 [4 favorites]


I just had to stop back in to say that is one adorable Wee Baby Palindromic.
posted by bearwife at 2:57 PM on November 30, 2015 [5 favorites]


Secret Quonzar!! I got a lovely surprise in the mail today -- gorgeous yarn, and the people who made it are MeFites?? I've been browsing their website, and it looks like a wonderful place! Thank you so much! (And not only is it yarn from an independent, it's from Vermont, my home state!)
posted by sarcasticah at 3:09 PM on November 30, 2015 [3 favorites]


I have been Quonsed! I keep a stash of teas at work for when I need a treat, and this will more than double my stash. And I can't wait to try the cherry tea and chocolate-covered cherries--it will bring me back to the five summers I spent at camp in Michigan. Thank you, anonymous Quonsar!
posted by Liesl at 3:24 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]


You are my Quonsee, sarcasticah! So glad your gift arrived and you like it. Made by Mefi's own turtlegirl and terrapin.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 3:34 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]


minsies was a great quonsar this year. Gingerbread popcorn? Royal blend tea? A spring-handle tea-infuser? Check, check, check. Thank you!!
posted by tooloudinhere at 3:47 PM on November 30, 2015 [3 favorites]


Yay! Thank you, cheapskatebay, for the lovely pens, highlighters, post-its and coffee! This med student is delighted to have these new items with which to obsessively color-code study materials beyond the point of sanity. (And coffee with which to get myself overly properly caffeinated.)
posted by ocherdraco at 3:53 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]


And the beautiful (cherrywood?) dish: I love wooden dishes and spoons and such. How did you know, o anonymous Quonsar?
posted by Liesl at 3:56 PM on November 30, 2015


It took me longer to finish my quonsee's gift than I thought it would, but finish it I did! And it will be out in the mail tomorrow (just under the deadline). Whew! I hope she likes it!
posted by patheral at 4:00 PM on November 30, 2015


Got my first Quonsbox to the post office a few minutes ago! I hope my Quonsee likes it!
posted by peppermind at 4:06 PM on November 30, 2015


Count me in as another one who just finished her quonsee's main gift! It's all set and wrapped. Now to figure out what else to add in before I put it all in the post bag and trek it to the box!
posted by E. Whitehall at 5:06 PM on November 30, 2015


What can you expect from a quonsar like jet_pack_in_a_can except for a sweet beer glass in the shape of a can (from a brewery that I hope to visit some day) packed with beads in the best colours known to humankind. I'm pretty sure these grey ones are lava! Like from a volcano!

Thank you! I can't wait to pour myself a glass and get to crafting!
posted by sparklemotion at 5:10 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]


Hooray, I'm happy you like everything! The grey beads are, indeed, lava. :)
posted by jet_pack_in_a_can at 5:58 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you, jessypie, for the darling ornament and yummy candies! And the card is so cute, too. The little guy will hang on our tree with pride!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 6:54 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]


My SQ has been sending me postcards in preparation for receiving my gift! I got #1 and then #2, and then a while went by and I got #4, and then I couldn't remember if I received #3 but misplaced it or if I just never got it. That question was answered today when postcards #3 and #5 showed up together. Mysteries of the USPS!

The fifth postcard indicated it would be the last as my present should be shipping out today. Postcard four was very cryptic ("If you dislike Starbucks, will you like what Starbuck dislikes?") and having never read Moby Dick nor seen anything beyond the pilot of the new BSG, I am sort of at a loss for what either Starbuck might dislike and have been googling character bios since then. I now know a lot about the Pequod but I still have no idea what this clue is telling me, haha.

This has been fantastic so far and I haven't even gotten my gift yet.
posted by meggan at 7:05 PM on November 30, 2015 [3 favorites]


Time for a proper thank you to young_simba for the excellent tollhouse bars (all gone, I even dumped the crumbs into my mouth) and for the books in the Griffin & Sabine Trilogy--they were a perfect choice! I loved everything. Here's a picture of the goodies.
posted by lucy.jakobs at 7:48 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]


...oh, my poor family, where I plan to stick those googly eyes....

posted by Lulu's Pink Converse at 1:16 PM on November 30


Yes! My heart is surrounded in a glittery snowfall of joy! I am so glad you liked everything, Lulu's Pink Converse!
posted by Munching Langolier at 8:21 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]


I knew the quote, but I couldn't quite place it and thought briefly that my SQ might be some sort of survivalist.

Hehe! I hope this didn't freak you out! It was a really fun box to put together.
posted by mostly vowels at 8:25 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]


I have been quonsed by brilliantine, and I am grinning from ear to ear. I just opened a package of goodies including 2 hard ciders (my beverage of choice); a library totebag (libraries and totebags being two of my favorite things); and, oh my gosh, a handmade ornament of a koi pond! Thank you so much for the thoughtful gifts and lovely note.
posted by terooot at 9:07 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you mysterious anonymous quonsar for the delicious taffy and charming slug shirt! I am full of the warm sparkly spirit of quonsmas, and also taffy.

My quonsee's box will be in the mail tomorrow, headed to colder climes. Safe travels, little box of fun.
posted by esoterrica at 9:18 PM on November 30, 2015 [2 favorites]


I hope this didn't freak you out!
Not at all - it was part of the fun! Mostly vowels, you did a truly great job! Here it is - with Boo Radley sneaking up for a little catnip!
posted by kbar1 at 9:21 PM on November 30, 2015 [1 favorite]


Glad you liked everything, tooloudinhere!

I hope the popcorn was still edible - I wasn't sure how long it would be OK.
posted by minsies at 10:24 PM on November 30, 2015


I would like to say thank you to my Secret Quonsar but my wife has stolen the gift, insisting that I am not allowed to open it until the 25th (IN DIRECT CONTRAVENTION OF SECRET QUONSAR RULES) so, to whom it may concern, thank you. An actual thank you will follow on Xmas day where I will pass on my official thanks after I explain what on Earth Secret Quonsar is to my elderly relatives.
posted by longbaugh at 3:05 AM on December 1, 2015 [9 favorites]


That was me longbaugh: and you’re very welcome! I daresay delaying Quonsmas until yuletide is not unheard-of, vaguely unorthodox though it may seem. I hope you like the gift. And good luck in explaining the mysteries of SQ to the uninitiated!
posted by misteraitch at 4:25 AM on December 1, 2015


I took my SQ gist to the postbox via a work night out and had to explain to everyone what it was.
(And that they should all remind me not to leave it in the pub)
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 4:39 AM on December 1, 2015


Yay terooot, I'm so happy you liked everything! I had a lot of fun putting it all together :)
posted by brilliantine at 6:19 AM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


Apparently my idea of an expected delivery date and the final thing I needed for my parcel's seller's idea did not quite mesh but my parcel went into the post office today. Hopefully it will arrive with my Quonsar in the next couple of days. :D
posted by halcyonday at 6:25 AM on December 1, 2015


Had really truly planned & expected to ship to my quonsee yesterday, but when I had the goodies ready to pack I was suddenly struck by how totally lame it all was. Gotta do a little rethinking, new expected ship-date should be this Friday!
posted by easily confused at 6:56 AM on December 1, 2015


I was Quonsed by ocherdraco!!!! BEE and CHICKEN HALLOWEEN COSTUMES!?!?!? They are fabulous little vintage photos of all of my favorite things in such sweet little frames!!!!!! Putting them up in my office this morning! I am so excited to use my new little notebook (it's freaking perfect!!!) and my office supplies. I love Quonsmas SO much and I thank you ocherdraco for making me smile and giggle with glee last night as the husband puzzled over why complete strangers would do this for one another (but he's just glad I'm happy.)
posted by Sophie1 at 6:59 AM on December 1, 2015 [5 favorites]


If you want to share pics on Instagram, please use the #SecretQuonsar #quonsmas hashtags so we can all see!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 7:03 AM on December 1, 2015 [8 favorites]


My gift is boxed up, and will be subjected to the whims of the USPS this afternoon! Soon, my quonsee!
posted by Fig at 7:51 AM on December 1, 2015


Quonsmas package is in the mail today, and should be received in two days. Woo!
posted by needlegrrl at 7:51 AM on December 1, 2015


I encourage sharing pics on Instagram, and using the #SecretQuonsar #quonsmas hashtags so we can all see!

It is something I am in favour of.
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 7:56 AM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


Mine should be delivered by the end of the week!
posted by mochapickle at 7:56 AM on December 1, 2015


Yay! I'm glad you like them, Sophie1! I had so much fun putting them together.
posted by ocherdraco at 7:59 AM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


And now I have an instagram account so that I can do that too.
posted by Just this guy, y'know at 8:28 AM on December 1, 2015


I've been quonsed! At my office, with a huge thing of chopped onions! Nobody here quite understands why I'm so excited about onions, but I'm simply giddy. Thank you mystery quonsmas fairy!
posted by youngergirl44 at 10:05 AM on December 1, 2015 [3 favorites]


EEE!!! Another box has arrived! with a wonderful mouse doorstop and MOON CHEESE! I was excited enough when there were just onions, and now I'm positively vibrating. Many, many more thanks to my mystery quonser. You rock!
posted by youngergirl44 at 10:19 AM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


Package sent! Let all acknowledge my deadline obedience.
posted by curious nu at 10:27 AM on December 1, 2015 [5 favorites]


I also got my package out in the mail today. Sorry, quonsee for my tardiness, we were flooded (literally) and I've been dealing with insurance adjusters and whatnot. But it's finished and in the mail! I hope you like it.
posted by patheral at 11:08 AM on December 1, 2015 [2 favorites]


(This is my first Quonsar and I'm pretty glad I participated! Thanks for setting all this up, Quonsar Team)
posted by curious nu at 11:46 AM on December 1, 2015 [2 favorites]


My package is iiiiiiiiiiin the mail!

I was in line behind a woman who was either super-nervous (shaking hands?) or she had done the impossible and packed up a marmoset for shipping. Pretty sure she wasn't a MeFite, but if your package arrives a-shaking and a-catterwauling, you might want to drop me a note before you open it.
posted by julen at 11:55 AM on December 1, 2015 [3 favorites]


Just shipped out my package, hopefully it will make the journey safe and sound.

I also just received my gift from a wonderful Mefite in Hawaii yesterday. They sent some lovely postcards which will make for some delightfully confusing correspondence when I send them out, in all their sunny-beach glory, from the depths of a winter snow storm. They also gifted me two music/noise makers aka cat confusion devices—some kind of percussion instrument, which I don't know the name of, and a duck (do they have ducks in Hawaii?) call, both hand painted with beautiful in beautiful detail. Thanks so much, person who chose to remain anonymous!
posted by metaphorever at 12:19 PM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


I hope my Quonsee is patient because I'm going to be a day late with posting :( I had wrangled some free time tomorrow to get to the post office during working hours and right before she left today my boss unwrangled it for me. But it should be on your doorstep by Saturday at the latest (subject to Royal Mail shenanigans)
posted by billiebee at 12:26 PM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have Quonsed.
posted by KingEdRa at 12:33 PM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


My Quonsee has received their gifts according to the tracking details. I hope they like them!
posted by grumpybear69 at 12:52 PM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have quonsed and been quonsed! Thank you so much, grumpybear69, for the awesome crinkly cat cave and the completely, delightfully, befuddling puzzle! There are lots of new fun and hijinks around my house, thanks to you! YAY!
posted by ourobouros at 1:01 PM on December 1, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thank you Gotanda - they were indeed awesome snacks! I can't wait to try them all. I'm also amazed that the package made it to North Carolina from Japan in just 4 days.

(Gives me hope for my gift, which I shamefully just mailed yesterday... don't fret, quonsee.)
posted by Sweetie Darling at 1:08 PM on December 1, 2015 [2 favorites]


My Quonsmas package is on its way! I hope my Quonsee likes it! It's heavy and padded but I promise there isn't an angry marmoset inside...
posted by RedOrGreen at 1:11 PM on December 1, 2015


First half was ordered to ship to my Quonseee yesterday, and now I am waiting for the post office to open to mail the other half. Soon, Quonsee!
posted by E. Whitehall at 1:50 PM on December 1, 2015


I have just shipped my packages to my Quonsee, because there is no minute as sweet as the very last minute. Oh Quonsee, I hope they make you happy!
posted by athenasbanquet at 2:16 PM on December 1, 2015 [3 favorites]


Looks like I killed the old thread last night with the sad admission that I wouldn't make today's deadline...but wait! I managed to rally and get my shit together and mailed my package a few hours ago.
To another hemisphere, no less!
posted by chococat at 2:31 PM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


Package is in the mail. I'm filled with doubt about the contents now that I've seen what other Quonsees have received. I hope my recipient isn't disappointed.
posted by Kangaroo at 2:33 PM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


My secret quonsar, rebent, made me a handmade Midori/Fauxdori notebook, because he is awesome. It is a beautifully-made leather cover with a notebook insert and more space for more inserts. So I went on Etsy just now and bought a calendar insert and a pen loop. Let the Secret Quonsar envyfest commence.

Thank you, rebent! Your gift made my week!
posted by Atrahasis at 3:06 PM on December 1, 2015 [3 favorites]


Boy, now I feel REALLY guilty about being late at sending out my quonsee's gift, because I have been well and truly quonsed ---- thank you many, many times, oh mystery quonser: all I know about you is that your real name is Anne, you probably live in DC, and you have FANTASTIC taste in cookies!
posted by easily confused at 3:39 PM on December 1, 2015 [2 favorites]


My quonsee's gift has been sent out! I think this is the first year I've gotten it out by the deadline.

If you have a 3 in your zip code and an N in your city name, WATCH OUT! (I feel like that's sufficiently vague, yes?) YOUR GIFT MAY BE ARRIVING BY FRIDAY!
posted by phunniemee at 3:45 PM on December 1, 2015 [2 favorites]


Shipped today! Now to anxiously watch the tracking thing. Quonsee, it should be there in 2 days!
posted by Weeping_angel at 3:53 PM on December 1, 2015


I have the main components for my gift, it's the little extras that are holding me up. A thousand apologies, dear quonsar, for missing the deadline and having no solid timeframe to give you. I'm hoping to have the package out by next Monday at the latest.
posted by MsVader at 3:58 PM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


Quonzee! My package to you will (hopefully) go out this coming weekend! I'm still working on A Thing.
posted by sarcasticah at 5:32 PM on December 1, 2015


the handmade part of my gift has been finished for a while, but I'm waiting on something in the mail. it should arrive tomorrow, and I'll get it sent out either tomorrow or Thursday! sorry for the delay!
posted by amandi at 5:48 PM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


Quonsmas is here! Poor not-yet-Mr.Nolechick. He brought in the mail and I tore open the envelope without much of a hi. Many thanks to amelliferae for a yummy looking raspberries in dark chocolate bar and new game Dutch Blitz! I will have to tell my friends that a game night is in order!
posted by Nolechick11 at 7:55 PM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


we have been quonsed! thank you to BlackPebble for the fancy zazzle cat t-shirt!!
(Also I just packed my quonsee's box and will ship first thing tomorrow)
posted by tangaroo at 8:59 PM on December 1, 2015 [2 favorites]


Shipping Day Statistics!

437    participants

89      presents have already arrived (almost 20.4%!)
42      are known to be in transit (9.6%)
3         might have arrived; we’re awaiting confirmation
15      other presents have notes associated with them in our status sheet (running late notes, anonymized questions, etc)

21      number of countries packages will be sent from, delivered to, or end up in
4         people have gotten their gift but are saving it to open later!
23      different animals represented in gifts (that we know about) so far
posted by julen at 9:04 PM on December 1, 2015 [10 favorites]


I shipped mine today! I used to love doing the whole wrapping-pretty thing but I hit a wall where either I would ship the gift on time or wrap it nicely and maybe never ship it, so I am going with "It's the thought that counts" for presentation. But there was very much thought involved with the gift-purchasing. I just seem to have lost my gift-wrapping skills.
posted by jaguar at 9:10 PM on December 1, 2015


Mine went out yesterday and should hopefully arrive on Thursday. My quonsee and I seem to share an interest and I got far too into the whole thing, so he'll either enjoy the slightly offbeat gifts I selected for him or think I'm a nut.
posted by thetortoise at 9:14 PM on December 1, 2015 [1 favorite]


Raise your hand if you got back from the post office after mailing and did the slightly nervous double-check that you didn't forget to put something in the package, half expecting to see it there on the kitchen table. Just me?
posted by chococat at 9:29 PM on December 1, 2015 [7 favorites]


I brought my gifts into work today so that I could go to the post office after, and so I actually had a slightly nervous double-check that I didn't forget to remove any work stuff from the package.
posted by jaguar at 9:32 PM on December 1, 2015


I had my quonsee's gift shipped directly from an etsy seller, and wasn't able to include a note with it. So I watched the tracking and dropped her a memail when I saw it had been delivered. It turned out to be such an apropos gift that when she opened it, she assumed she'd ordered it for herself and forgotten. Yay me!
posted by not that girl at 9:43 PM on December 1, 2015 [12 favorites]


This was great motivation for me to finish up some non-Quonsar things that needed to be packed up and shipped off. Turns out that my impulse to consolidate was good, because I stood in line at the post office for half an hour. It's all good though, once I got up there the super-efficient holiday post office people got everything ready to go in less than two minutes, including my Quonsee's.
posted by Mizu at 10:20 PM on December 1, 2015


chococat total lol yes I almost taped up the box!
posted by dorian at 10:54 PM on December 1, 2015


My gift is in the mail, and will be flying across the world as fast as the Japanese postal system will allow it. Sorry in advance for the ugly wrapping job. And the quantity of tape on the outside of the box. Hopefully the contents are to your liking though, secret quonsee!
posted by emmling at 11:29 PM on December 1, 2015


I posted my gift out to Amurrrrica last week and, as if by instant karma, mine from my Quonser arrived yesterday!

I am already halfway through the truffles and I am more than halfway through this book which couldn't be a more perfect fit for my interests than if it had been written for me. Amazing!

Thank you so much Secret Quonsar - I am warm and fed and have reading material and am wearing paper pineapples. You're awesome!
posted by citands at 1:02 AM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


Mine went into the post bright and early this morning! There is a monumental amount of ziplock bag, bubble wrap, and tape involved, but I was terrified that some contents would break and leak on everything else, so hopefully it's not overkill. It should be with my quonsee within 3 days!
posted by catch as catch can at 2:34 AM on December 2, 2015


Wow. Those 4 people who have elected to wait and open your gifts later?

YOU HAVE WILL OF IRON.

Iron.
posted by Faintdreams at 3:56 AM on December 2, 2015 [8 favorites]


I sent mine off today! (and I admire everyone who is way more on their game & sent things super early. I USED TO BE LIKE YOU.)
posted by aaanastasia at 5:33 AM on December 2, 2015 [4 favorites]


YAY citands, I've been anxiously refreshing the tracking info since I posted it! I'm so glad you hadn't already read it! Merry quonsmas!
posted by theseldomseenkid at 5:39 AM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yesterday I came home to find a box from ourobouros filled with some amazing coffee and treats and little HO scale photographer that will eventually have a place of prominence in my train layout.

Thank you, ourobouros! Woohoo!
posted by bondcliff at 6:24 AM on December 2, 2015 [4 favorites]


Tracking shows my quonsee's package has arrived! Enjoy!
posted by probably not that Karen Blair at 7:18 AM on December 2, 2015


I got coffee and a great mug from my secret quonsar! Lookee! (Also pictured: a cat who thinks her human is entirely too silly.)

I put the package for my secret quonsee in the mail today. Fly, little package, fly!
posted by metaquarry at 7:46 AM on December 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


I sent my package today (a package in two parts). We will see which part arrives first... I expect my poor quonsar might be a bit confused if package 2 of 2 arrives first, but I cannot control the vagaries of the post office (esp. internationally).

And I also solved the last of the puzzles from my own quonsmas- quite enjoyable. I'm going to start pestering officemates with them soon ;-) Thanks to smoke! Speaking of, no worries, desk tchotkes+puzzles are pretty perfect for me, so it felt personalized to me!
posted by nat at 8:08 AM on December 2, 2015


I sent mine yesterday, and it was pouring here so the box got a little wet and of course I'm all panicky that the contents got soaked. Which is of course stupid because it was just a little rain for about two minutes. Anyway. It's supposed to arrive at my quonsee's tomorrow. This is my first Quonsmas -- very exciting!
posted by holborne at 8:11 AM on December 2, 2015


I sent mine yesterday, and it was pouring here so the box got a little wet and of course I'm all panicky that the contents got soaked. Which is of course stupid because it was just a little rain for about two minutes.

ha, you casual. When heading out to mail my gift yesterday I noticed that the forecast said rain, so I went back into the house and grabbed a plastic bag to protect it. Did it rain? No. Was I ready just in case? Oh yes.

I am become quonsar, mailer of gifts.
posted by phunniemee at 8:17 AM on December 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


Mailed my quonsee's package yesterday! Now to obsessively refresh this thread and find out if she likes it, or if i'm the worst quonsar ever.

pleasepleaselikeit
posted by spinturtle at 8:48 AM on December 2, 2015 [4 favorites]


Oh no! I thought the deadline was today, not yesterday!

I am shipping today and will meet my own made-up deadline, if that's worth anything.
posted by mudpuppie at 9:05 AM on December 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


/me JOINS THE QUASINGULARITY

maxwelton, your gift is now on the waaaaaaaaayyyyyy!

So now I am free to open my own gift which is…*rustle, rustle*…some awesome makin'-supplies from the wonderful JMOZ! Thanks, JMOZ!

My wife promised to teach me to use a sewing machine this summer, but she never came through, so I will wield the Speedy-Stich to sew down the (crimson) strap ends on my sweet (black) Stitchless Leather Bag. And the Instamorph will let me make a little collar for holding the end of a recalcitrant power cord which always tries to slither behind my desk.

Great gifts, expertly chosen! I am happy!!
posted by wenestvedt at 9:26 AM on December 2, 2015 [4 favorites]


My package is headed west, due on Saturday,
posted by ChuraChura at 9:45 AM on December 2, 2015


USPS claims my package should be there on Saturday. The kindly post office worker let my duct-taped box through, even though that's technically not allowed, because "it's just going ground. It's not like you're gonna blow up any planes or anything."
posted by ActionPopulated at 9:57 AM on December 2, 2015


Shoot, I thought the deadline was today as well! I am sending mine tonight.
posted by quaking fajita at 10:31 AM on December 2, 2015


I double checked my email, and the deadline is in fact today ("Your gift should be in the mail on or before December 2") So I don't feel guilty at all (well, I feel a little guilty) for not getting the package into the mail until this morning.

It should show up on Friday, looking forward to knowing if I chose wisely for my Quonsee.
posted by sparklemotion at 10:38 AM on December 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


I sent my package off to VA today. Happy Friday, dear Quonsee!
posted by initapplette at 10:41 AM on December 2, 2015


Mine went to the post office yesterday! With many stickers and tape in what Mr. bowtiesarecool informs me is an entirely excessive amount of places. Sorry, quonsee! I meant well; hopefully that means it didn't scatter its contents everywhere en route!
posted by bowtiesarecool at 11:01 AM on December 2, 2015


Hello secret quonsee, I will be at the post office today to mail your package!

(The lead lining is a precaution; it's barely radioactive at all, though I wouldn't hold it for more than, say, a couple of seconds at a time.)
posted by maxwelton at 11:04 AM on December 2, 2015 [4 favorites]


the deadline is in fact today
You mean I was a day EARLY? I don't think I've ever been early for anything, ever.
posted by chococat at 11:10 AM on December 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


I mailed mine yesterday; I usually don't wait that long to mail my SQ gift, but I sent a few goodies acquired on a recent trip to Japan, and you know, I had to actually go to Japan first. Is 5,681 miles too far to go for the perfect gift for my quonsee? I don't think so! Hopefully the quonsee thinks their gifts are worth the wait .
posted by Atrahasis at 11:28 AM on December 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


I was feeling like the world's biggest screw-up. I am going to miss what I thought was the deadline (December 2nd) and in looking up the grace period, if any, I found a reference to December 1st. "What? I'm already late?" I thought.

Thanks, sparklemotion, I now feel like perhaps the world's tenth biggest screw-up, because I am one day less late quonsing.
posted by zorseshoes at 11:30 AM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


Reporting in to say that I too thought the deadline was today for some reason. Probably because I'm a slacker. Good news: I have all of my items. Bad news: they are not yet in a box or shipped. I am writing this out to you (and mostly to myself, let's be honest) to promise that I'll get them boxed and shipped in the next 24 hours. Next time I report in I should have a tracking number in hand.
posted by Cuke at 11:58 AM on December 2, 2015


Looks like the sign-up thread said December 1 was the deadline, while the emails said December 2. So everybody's right!
posted by jaguar at 12:13 PM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]



I'm the screw up! I made sure the date was my intended date (the 1st!) everywhere except in one email template. A mere 24 hours isn't going to break the quonsmas bank, nor will 48 hours for those of you who might not make it under the Indiana Jones-style closing door of the post office at the end of the day today.

If you think you are going to be running rather late, let us know so we can help your quonsee know when to keep an eye out. Being proactive and communicative is awesome. We've already given several passes for folks (for reasons ranging from mail strikes to life events to wonky vendors).
posted by julen at 12:16 PM on December 2, 2015 [4 favorites]


Also! If you haven't checked the MeTa front page today, you should! The Annual Gift Drive for Kids (and this year: Seniors!) is afoot.
posted by julen at 12:19 PM on December 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


The post office is being willful, and pretending that the tracking on my quonsee's package is non-existent. Hopefully this just means they forgot to scan the package, and not that they've lost it entirely.
posted by needlegrrl at 12:21 PM on December 2, 2015


I'm the screw up! I made sure the date was my intended date (the 1st!) everywhere except in one email template.

No, I said everybody's right. You are therefore right. Both times.
posted by jaguar at 12:24 PM on December 2, 2015 [5 favorites]


Guys guys guys! So I left work early today due to feeling a bit unwell. Was sitting around feeling mopey and blah, and mrsturtle comes home with 'you had a small box in the mail'. I'm thinking it's something I ordered for her for Xmas, nbd. Then I look at the return address, and it's from China? Open it up and it's tea! In addition to all the other fun stuff received last week, my SQ sent me freaking TEA from CHINA!!!!! THANK YOU SECRET QUONSAR YOU ARE THE BESTEST!!!!!!!!!!
posted by spinturtle at 1:11 PM on December 2, 2015 [5 favorites]


Sent a package of marmosets across the pond today. And since this is the thank-you thread and today has turned out to be yet another terrible horrible no good very bad day in terms of peace love and understanding, I humbly express my gratitude to julen and the quonselves, and every quonser out there who's participating in this warm-hearted exchange of trinkets and camaraderie. Would that everyone had a metafilter - a clean, well-lighted, gently moderated place to talk/listen, share/lurk, teach/learn, give/receive.
posted by headnsouth at 1:18 PM on December 2, 2015 [10 favorites]


Mine shipped yesterday!
posted by Lulu's Pink Converse at 1:19 PM on December 2, 2015


I've always wanted a marmoset. I hope mine is good and angry when it arrives.
posted by Too-Ticky at 1:34 PM on December 2, 2015 [9 favorites]


Blargh. Sent the first part of the presents, but the super-awesome present may take weeks, if not months to accomplish for Reasons Beyond My Control. I feel like I suck at Quonsing, now.
posted by culfinglin at 2:12 PM on December 2, 2015


USPS says my quonsee's parcel was delivered 'in/at mailbox' yesterday ay 12.49 PM, so here's hoping that it's arrived safely into their home

And as if by magic, my husband just handed me a box that has proven to contain mysterious, wrapped packages ... with lovely holly and pine sprigs in the box to make it all festive! I have a super crappy work week to finish up, so saving the opening of said wrapped items for the weekend, when I will post pictures. Thank you to my SQ, and also to all the quonselves for putting all this work in!

Love quonsmas!
posted by darsh at 2:33 PM on December 2, 2015


My package has now been boxed and dropped off at Canada Post. I shall commence tracking.
posted by Cuke at 3:11 PM on December 2, 2015


STACEY. daisyace. Are these HOMEMADE chocolate dipped caramels I am eating?! They are, aren't they? You are a caramel wizard and they're delicious and I love them and it's really hard to not just cookie monster them all into my mouth. YUM.

And the WHALE! I received an adorable white ceramic whale dish with the cutest little face and polka dotted inside and egads I cannot even believe you included the return receipt because this is never leaving. It's perfect!!!

Thank you so much! You totally nailed my style (and my taste in candy).
posted by meggan at 3:24 PM on December 2, 2015 [5 favorites]


Package sent!
Should arrive in 3 days... yay!
posted by Laura in Canada at 3:38 PM on December 2, 2015


meggan -- hooray, your great guidance made it easy! As did my own presents from chaoticgood, which in a daisychain of quonsaric goodness, got put to their first use making those caramels! Very glad you like your gifts :)
posted by daisyace at 4:13 PM on December 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


Package is on its way! Keeping my fingers crossed that I didn't completely miss the mark, gifts-wise.
posted by atropos at 4:40 PM on December 2, 2015


Package away!
posted by nubs at 5:08 PM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


The package to my quonsee did indeed get sent today--the police even gave me a ride home after the small misunderstanding about my purely rhetorical question about the okay-ness of sending pre-incineration cremains.
posted by maxwelton at 5:25 PM on December 2, 2015 [5 favorites]


What's that you say? Marmosets?
posted by wenestvedt at 5:28 PM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


A wonderful gift from my anonymous quonsar arrived yesterday! I received some beautiful, soft yarn and a super-cute, sheepy coin purse.

The yarn hits my ideal gift spot: something I would have longed for but not splurged on for myself, and the coin purse will replace my worn cloth one. I love those little sheep!

Thanks so much, secret Seattle quonsar! Now I'm off to look for just the right crochet pattern.

(Sent my quonsee's gift on its way to Maine today. USPS says it should arrive Friday.)
posted by erloteiel at 5:31 PM on December 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


I just checked the USPS tracking for the gift I sent, and saw that it was listed as having arrived at the nearest-to-me big-city post office and was "in transit to the destination" and I thought, "How funny that my quonsee ended up being someone who lived so close!" and then I realized that while my quonsar is secret to me, my quonsee is not secret to me, and I know full well where I sent my gift, as the post office generally requires an address in order to deliver packages. (In my defense, it's been a long day.)
posted by jaguar at 5:41 PM on December 2, 2015 [8 favorites]


I've been quonsed most awesomely. I took pictures but suddenly I can't upload to imgur for some reason.

So wrapped in lovely green and yellow wrapping paper I got four green and blue (perfect since they're sky, water, and plant colours!) inktense pencil crayons, from the art store at the Emily Carr College on Granville island. These came in a cute owl-themed pencil case. Also from Granville island, I'm guessing, is a fresh-grass scented candle. And finally I got some cute whimsical greeting cards (and bonus, though it took me a second to catch on..) the front of the cards are only partially coloured, so they need colouring. Maybe I will use my new pencils!

Thanks, Alicat, this is all great, and I'm going to try the pencil crayons right now!
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 5:47 PM on December 2, 2015 [3 favorites]


I got my quonsar yesterday! It was so great! A coloring book, some candies from Asia, and an AWESOME sheep sculpture, which is sitting with our Christmas decorations now! My quonsar kept themselves secret, so whoever sent me my gifts, THANK YOU so very much!

Now I have to go to the post office to send my quonsee the gifts I got for them. I think I did okay. I'm actually kind of proud of myself.
posted by xingcat at 6:20 PM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


The gift I am sending will have to go out tomorrow! Work deadlines interfered I'm afraid. I will check back into the thread here to confirm that it got into the mail.
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 6:25 PM on December 2, 2015


I dropped my present in my Quonsee's mailbox last night and am now waiting expectantly...
posted by arcticseal at 6:31 PM on December 2, 2015


I have been QUONSED SO HARD! A huge thank you to my Quonsar!! I received the Official Game of Thrones Coloring book, the Star Wars 100 Images to Inspire Creativity and Relaxation (more coloring!) and Staedtler colored pencils to use. I feel so spoiled! These totally hit every sweet spot of my likes and obsessions.
And there have been hints that there is a second half to my quonsmas to come....Seriously, mystery Quonsar, you've done so much already! Thank you!!
posted by tipsyBumblebee at 7:12 PM on December 2, 2015 [4 favorites]


knowing he lives in the same city as articseal, doublechecks mailbox. Guess I'm excited to see what quonsmas will bring!
posted by nubs at 7:22 PM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


Next year, nubs! I'd bribe the hamsters to make sure I'd get you, but they're (mostly) incorruptible.
posted by arcticseal at 7:25 PM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


Ah, those hamsters! :)
posted by nubs at 7:26 PM on December 2, 2015


Sent my quonsee's present out today! Hoping they like it :)
posted by Gymnopedist at 7:36 PM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm the lucky arcticseal-quonsee whose mailbox was Secretly Quonsed! We just switched to community mailboxes in our area and so I don't check my house mailbox everyday. But I got a message from the SQ Elves to check, and there it was! A wonderful card of a ticked-off owl, with a wish from arcticseal for Quonsmas happiness and pants full of fish (my husband looked at me oddly), and goodies, too! The coolest ever poseable robot which will become my new fidget thinking toy, spaceship stickers, a notebook for my purse, and amazing multi-colour pencils which just beg to be used to storyboard and make my stick figures art. I couldn't be more pleased. Thank you, arcticseal!
posted by angiep at 8:02 PM on December 2, 2015 [4 favorites]


Yay! tipsyBumblebee, I'm so glad you liked the presents! And yes, there is more to come, but it depends on someone else who is notorious for needing minding. So it might be… a long while. But it will be a hell of a surprise when it does finally arrive!
posted by culfinglin at 8:11 PM on December 2, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you to The demon that lives in the air for my wonderful book of poetry: Patricia Lockwood's Motherland Fatherland Homelandsexuals. I am so, so, so excited to read it!
posted by Ragini at 8:17 PM on December 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


So glad you like the gifts, I loved the ticked-off owl on first sight and may have to go back and pick up some of the pencils for myself this weekend.
posted by arcticseal at 8:32 PM on December 2, 2015


I'm feeling bummed out because I missed SQ signups this year after 3 great years participating.

The original thread is now closed. Does anyone want to do a non-secret quonsar swap with me? I just love giving gifts and find it fun to try to find something really cool for a friendly stranger, plus I've always gotten wonderfully neat things from it. MeMail me if you're interested with your address and any guidance on your gift.
posted by treehorn+bunny at 8:33 PM on December 2, 2015 [4 favorites]


A wonderful package arrived at my door yesterday! Small packages, each wrapped individually. I told myself that I'd only open one a day, to stretch out the anticipation, but less than 30 later, each package was ripped open with glee. I happened to be in the middle of band practice with some non-MeFites at the time and it filled my heart with pride to show off my new treasures and describe the origins and traditions of Quonsmas and, by proxy, Metafilter. The latter is difficult to explain by itself, and the former is doubly so ("It's a blog? With other people? And you ask questions about cats?")

But I tried my best. I talked about my musical collaborations in MeFi Music, the myriad #s of problems that AskMefi has helped me solve, my long history of connecting with people all over the world via IRL, Quonsmas, and MeFi Cookie Swaps.

So sayeth our drummer: "That sounds really cool"
Me: "Yeah, I've got a pretty good thing going"

This is my 6th Quonsar swap and I love it every year. Thanks Quonsee, Thanks Quonsar, Thanks Metafilter. You are a pretty damn good thing indeed.
posted by chara at 8:44 PM on December 2, 2015 [11 favorites]


I have a package! I Have A Package!! I HAVE A PACKAGE!!!

But since I still haven't sent my package out, I do not feel I've earned the right to open it. So, this lovely package will just sit here and taunt me until I'm able to get my shit together and get my poor quonsee's goodies in the mail.
posted by MsVader at 8:46 PM on December 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


"It's a blog? With other people? And you ask questions about cats?"

Ha! Perfect. Yes.
posted by jaguar at 8:50 PM on December 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


Many thanks to Neely O'Hara for the box of interesting cheeses which arrived on my doorstep earlier this evening! Apparently I wear my cheese-loving heart on my shoulder, since I just enjoyed a post-Thanksgiving cheese and charcuterie bash with my little brother a few days earlier. I'm also grateful to the old gods and the new that it arrived when I was actually around, since I was out of town until yesterday, but I am very much looking forward to eating everything with gusto.

And to The Elusive Architeuthis, I'm so glad you enjoyed your gifts! I was a little worried you might already have/not need them, but my sewist friend assured me the notions were among her favorites, and the sour gummy bears are my household's favorite new candy.

A happy quonsmas and merry quonsmukkah to all!
posted by Diagonalize at 8:59 PM on December 2, 2015 [2 favorites]


I am a bad Secret Quonsar in that I only finally packaged up everything and it's going into the mail tomorrow. In a karmic way, though, I haven't yet received any packages which I didn't order myself, so I guess I have that going for me. :D
posted by TrishaLynn at 9:27 PM on December 2, 2015


Just got back from mailing part two at the PO. Now both halves have been sent off!

Also, just discovered in my email that the previously-shipped first half is already said to be delivered to my Quonsee! Woo!
posted by E. Whitehall at 9:47 PM on December 2, 2015


TrishaLynn, me too - mine will be going in the mail tomorrow, and I'm actually sort of grateful that I haven't yet received anything to make me feel even guiltier about it. My quonsee only lives about five miles from me, though, so hopefully it won't take too long to arrive.
posted by une_heure_pleine at 9:58 PM on December 2, 2015


I'm so glad that I'm not the only one who waited until the last minute to ship! Should arrive on Friday says USPS. I've been house/dog sitting for a while and haven't had a chance to check mail at home for a few days. Can't wait to see if I got a package!
posted by gemmy at 10:01 PM on December 2, 2015


Dear super-secret-quonsar, (you know who you are, I hope)

Thank you for the lovely gifts; fancy honeys are one of my very favorite things, and the beeswax candles smell divine. The tray is gorgeous and the colors actually perfectly match a vase I have, so it has taken up residence beside it. Much appreciation!
posted by Soliloquy at 12:13 AM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


Tracking shows that my quonsee's gifts arrived today!
posted by SisterHavana at 12:36 AM on December 3, 2015


I haven't sent my quonsar gift out yet (I'm buying some final touches for it at the weekend).

But I've already received my gift - all the way from Germany, with some really lovely and thoughtful goodies in it, and so nicely packaged. My colleagues and I have already finished off the lovely Stollen and we're going to taste-test the drink/powder at lunch time (and there's a flavour there I've never heard of - so that's awesome).

Thank you so much for this - it's so thoughtful and kind! And made me so happy today :)
posted by SuckPoppet at 2:58 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Got my package yesterday! Thanks so much, meggan! I scored some delicious huckleberry jam and a cool magnet from her area; "The Kitchen Linens Book" which is sitting here whispering to me that I need to start some more unfinished craft projects (how did you know I covet embroidered tea towels?!); and a SUPERCOOL 1960s Junior Girl Scout needlecraft badge (which is going right on my GS totebag that I use for my leader stuff). I feel so delightfully quonsed!!!
posted by candyland at 6:28 AM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


this notice alerts you the following shipment has been delivered.
YAY, the parcel I sent my quonsee has arrived!
posted by 15L06 at 6:42 AM on December 3, 2015


I'm mailing my Secret Quonsar package today, finally! :)
posted by Annabelle74 at 8:00 AM on December 3, 2015


The USPS says my package arrived on Wednesday but as I understand it, my quonsee gets mail by diplomatic pouch so I have no idea if it has further traveling to do to actually arrive!
posted by SeedStitch at 8:09 AM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


AAAHH TRACKING UPDATED MY QUONSEE'S GIFT WILL ARRIVE TODAY
posted by phunniemee at 8:26 AM on December 3, 2015


Mine arrived! I am home sick today so it was so nice when two boxes arrived. (Quonsarer will be amused to know that they used two boxes to ship.) And the gifts are swell! Thank you!
posted by JanetLand at 9:01 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Mailed my package yesterday, took me until today to find the Thank You thread. Now that the deadline is recent, any chance we could get a sidebar bump or something?
posted by maryr at 9:19 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


PS: Apologies to my Quonsee. While everything in the package is perfectly work-safe, the package itself is pretty obviously not a Staples shipment. I didn't really think about that when I bought the pretty box. Hope you're not allergic to nuts!
posted by maryr at 9:28 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


USPS tells me that a delivery has been left for my quonsee. Go check your mail!
posted by maurice at 9:38 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Diagonalize, I am so happy that you are so amenable to interesting cheeses, and I'm so relieved that you were home at the right time to receive it. It was so much fun to pick them out and I hope you enjoy.

What fun for my first Quonsmas!
posted by Neely O'Hara at 10:39 AM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


My gift is on its way! It may be a tiny bit soggy as it is pelting with rain here and I got soaked on the way to the post office. Now to pray that it doesn't disappear/break/get eaten by rogue marmosets en route...
posted by billiebee at 10:54 AM on December 3, 2015


Laura in Canada... It only took 1 day, not 3! Thank you so much for the delightful teapot, which is really very attractive, and for the accompanying tea. I will put both to good use as soon as I finish this post! The socks were a lovely touch and your note was very kind. Many many thanks for the wonderful quonsing.
posted by valleys at 12:09 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Ack! I've just plowed through all the bullshit ~cyber monday/black friday~ emails, and realised that in the midst of them, I missed a notification that the gift I'd bought for my Quonsee was backordered.

That gift has been cancelled and a new gift is being purchased right now, but it's...definitely not going to be as on-time as I'd hoped I'd be. I'm so sorry!
posted by MeghanC at 12:23 PM on December 3, 2015


Argh, my Quonsee's gift is ready to go, but my car broke down on Tuesday and it's a bit of a hike to the post office - I was hoping to have time to walk there yesterday or today, but that didn't work out. I WILL get it there tomorrow - neither rain nor snow!
posted by DingoMutt at 12:29 PM on December 3, 2015


YAY! I've been Quonsed! Thank you to my secret quonsar, whoever you are. The books will be must read and the t-shirt much hugged. And the chocolate won't last long.

p.s. I sent my gift in the mail yesterday. It should arrive by Monday.
posted by Stynxno at 12:41 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Somehow, when I see "marmoset," I read it as "marmot," and therefore think of a ferret being dropped into a bathtub. I'm very confused on my primates and rodents.
posted by JMOZ at 1:43 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


I received my Quonsmas package on Saturday, but didn't open it until Tuesday after I'd sent my own shipment sailing overseas. When I did I found it full of lovely chocolate and excellent coffee from ferret branca — just perfect (I am drinking the coffee right now)! Thank you, ferret branca, and thanks to julen and everyone who helps make this happy event take place!
posted by Songdog at 2:31 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Have sent my Quonsmas package off in the mail today. I wasn't able to do many decorative flourishes, so apologies for the non-festive bits of matboard, bubble wrap, and crudely scrawled messages. Hopefully it will arrive safe and sound on Monday.
posted by PussKillian at 2:35 PM on December 3, 2015


The second part of my gifts has finally been sent (sick babies slow everything down).
posted by Gygesringtone at 3:12 PM on December 3, 2015


Thanks for the Exploding Kittens set, TigerMoth! I've been playing it a ton, it's a fabulous game. Though I'm worried I'm giving my cat ideas...
posted by Itaxpica at 3:50 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you so much, Lulu's Pink Converse! The candle is fabulous and I love it to pieces!! <3
posted by firei at 4:37 PM on December 3, 2015 [2 favorites]


I've been thinking of marmots, too. Huh. USPS tracking says my quonsee should get her package on Saturday.
posted by janell at 6:27 PM on December 3, 2015


Somehow, when I see "marmoset," I read it as "marmot," and therefore think of a ferret being dropped into a bathtub. I'm very confused on my primates and rodents.

Oh. Huh. My brain apparently did not even recognize those as different words, and I've been thinking that both were marmots. Or at least what I imagined marmots to look like. Which does not actually correspond to the photos of marmots I just looked up.
posted by jaguar at 6:28 PM on December 3, 2015


I'm quite sure both respond well to being dropped in bathtubs. You should try, for science.
posted by arcticseal at 6:40 PM on December 3, 2015 [6 favorites]


I received an intriguing cooking implement from Sands Made (combining my love of cooking and woodworking) as well as a lovely cheese knife, both soon to be put to good use! Thanks, Australian Quonsar!
posted by jedicus at 6:42 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thanks to my gifter. The Eye Care Massage is definitely something I had so idea to expect...or even knew existed, which is what makes Quansar so great!!!
posted by Nackt at 6:52 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have been Quonsed! By a most excellent and talented gift giving Weeping_angel! There was a slight amount of concern at the start, as one of the box flaps was open when it arrived on our doorstep, but it appears that all is well and intact (truly, I don't think any more goodness could have been stuffed into it).

We begin with some cool snowflake paper which totally speaks to my love of going for nighttime walks when it's snowing (the rare winter experience I miss since moving to the Bay Area). Which... how did you know?!? I spoke not of snowflakes on my questionnaire... Is this another weeping angel power?

Even our weirdo cat Fez approved of the paper rather than employing her usual run away in a panic! response. Yes, that is her look of approval.

Look at all the goodies! A lovely card, some awesome looking coffee beans, cocoa, a bag of home made deliciousness and 2 sweetly wrapped boxes. The paper mache piggy bank ornament is totally charming and the coffee mug is... I'm going to say it: all kinds of awesome.

What a fab bundle of Arizona goodies! Yes, the bag of rosemary cookies is already open and several are missing. I can state for the record, Weeping_angel is a better cook than Martha Stewart (I totally agree with your doubling the amount of rosemary... why was Martha being so stingy? The way you make them is clearly the correct and perfect version.) Thank you so much for my first SQ gift! The entire SQ experience has been spectacular.
posted by jenquat at 7:19 PM on December 3, 2015 [8 favorites]


I have been wonderfully and delightfully Quonsed by a mefite whose real name I know, but who did not put their username anywhere on the package. SO, thank you M from Vermont. I have neither read the book nor seen the movie you sent, but I very much look forward to doing both! And the handmade soap sampler is awesome--I love little local soap makers. Thank you thank you thank you! What a perfect thing to come home to after a very long day at work.
posted by mollymayhem at 9:48 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


firei, you are so welcome! I know it wasn't a whimsically wrapped package or anything, but I hope it smells wonderful and it's book-related!
posted by Lulu's Pink Converse at 10:55 PM on December 3, 2015 [1 favorite]


I got an amazing box of gifts from phunniemee! Thank you so much for your present. I had a super long day yesterday and didn't get home until like 8pm, exhausted and cranky, but your gift perked me up super fast!! I put the unboxing up on imgur for anyone interesting. THANKS SO MUCH!!
posted by possibilityleft at 7:32 AM on December 4, 2015 [3 favorites]


Came home from the doctor's office and grocery shopping to a PACKAGE at my door. And it was from the always mysterious A. Quonsar. After inspection by the cats, I opened it to find wonderful things from Philly including a jar of fig and honey jam from Di Bruno's (a place I definitely miss from my years in Philly), some halva from the Philly Halva Company and an urban garden chocolate bar! These will not last long and I just picked up a loaf of french bread this morning so I'm prepared for jam tasting.

For the cats there are two catnipped toys - which they've already fought over. And a new box to sit in while looking imperious.

And for the impending baby there's a really wonderful book about planting flowers to make the world a more beautiful place.

Thank you Action Populated. This really made my day.
posted by sciencegeek at 8:44 AM on December 4, 2015 [5 favorites]


Okay I admit I was tardy. I sent mine off today. I was assured that it will take 6 business days and I will be tracking it to make sure. So if you're out there and feeling blue about not getting yours like everyone else don't lose hope, it may just be late.
posted by Jalliah at 9:58 AM on December 4, 2015


According to USPS Tracking, my quonsee's package has been delivered to the front door/porch. Woo!
posted by holborne at 10:01 AM on December 4, 2015


look, sciencegeek, we NEED a pic of imperious-box-sitting. um, for science?
posted by dorian at 10:02 AM on December 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


I'm all the way over in Elsewheria so I'm not surprised about not having been Quonsed as yet. But hey! I'll probably have a surprise to unpack after the lot of you have all long gotten it over and done with!
posted by Too-Ticky at 10:05 AM on December 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


I have a notice from my post office that a package awaits. Since I don't remember ordering anything I'll have to see what it is later today. Updates to come!
posted by patheral at 10:08 AM on December 4, 2015


Cats refuse to pose. They're napping now (couch and chair). I have no idea where one of the catnip toys went. And the halvah seems to have mysteriously vanished as well (I blame the human for the last thing).
posted by sciencegeek at 10:19 AM on December 4, 2015 [4 favorites]


halva is a mysterious inevitably-invisible substance, I can assure you.
posted by dorian at 10:21 AM on December 4, 2015


Metafilter: cats refuse to pose
posted by dorian at 10:22 AM on December 4, 2015 [6 favorites]


I have been properly Quonsed! Thank you candyland for the delicious chocolates -- which disappeared way faster than they should have >_< -- and the two books from my Amazon wish list (Yay!), and especially for the vintage knitting book which I totally love! I go gaga for vintage knitting patterns and I am working up the nerve to one day knit socks and/or mittens. ^_^ The old-timey knitting needles are great as well, I don't think I have any that small, so it's perfect... Thank you so much! Happy Quonsmas everyone!
posted by patheral at 11:48 AM on December 4, 2015 [3 favorites]


Finally shipped to my quonsee! The post office says it'll arrive next Friday, but I'll be obsessively tracking it until it gets there. (And I apologize in advance for the sloppy re-used box, but hopefully dear quonsee, you'll approve of the contents!)
posted by easily confused at 12:49 PM on December 4, 2015


Due to an Amazon snafuoo, my quonsar gifts arrived in multiple parts, the final part of which arrived earlier this week, and they are all perfect.

I received the 'You Are Not So Smart' book - which I've been considering getting for ages, but as I've barely got time to listen to the podcast of the same title, kept not buying the book.
I shall definitely carve out time this christmas to read the book.

I also received some most excellent fruit tea, and some Kuretake brush pens and another book which ... well I'll not say here what the title is, but for reasons of serendipity is hilarious.

Thank you my dear quonsar giver, and also thankyou quonsar organisers for facilitating my joy.

HAPPY QUONSAR EVERYONE.
posted by Faintdreams at 1:00 PM on December 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


I've been Quonsed but I'm saving it to open after exams.
posted by sgrass at 1:07 PM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


maryr, I thought you might have been talking to me when I read this yesterday. And I'm so glad I was right.

A Box O Crazy (with a single loose screw) is the best thing ever.
posted by zinon at 1:40 PM on December 4, 2015 [5 favorites]


Ha! That's great, zinon!
posted by heyho at 1:44 PM on December 4, 2015


I have been thoroughly and wonderfully quonsed! Honestly, I don't even know what to say. This week has been just awful—work has been a nightmare (owing in part to the epic flooding my colleagues in Chennai are currently experiencing), senseless violence seems to be everywhere, my step-father's kidneys are failing, and my uncle passed away quite suddenly Wednesday evening, marking the second death in my family in the past month.

But then, a package arrived. I waited about 15 seconds to tear it open, because my willpower is apparently nonexistent. And what did I find inside, but a veritable fiber paradise! Four balls of some very soft, very colorful yarn indeed! (I do not yet know what it will become, but it will be cheerful and glorious.) A needle-felting kit that will make a cute little bunny! (I have never tried needle felting, but I have been itching to. And the sweetest little bunny used to live with me, although he left two years ago for the great alfalfa field in the sky; we spent seven lovely years together, and he is deeply missed. You couldn't have known, dear quonsar, but a bunny was just the perfect thing.) An utterly adorable, perfect, crocheted octopus! (My skill with a crochet hook is basically nil, and knitted octopuses are not nearly as cute. Oh, how I love him.) And some postcards of New York to add to my collection. And of course a lovely note.

I saw all of these things, and I just burst into tears, because... because. Because there was just too much going on in my head and in my heart, and there was nothing else to do. Because I've been feeling lonely and out of touch for a while, and for a moment I felt like "oh, I have a friend." Because I almost didn't sign up this year. Because there is something so wonderful about strangers sending gifts to strangers, just for the joy of it, just to brighten each other's day. holborne—thank you, thank you, thank you. This was the perfect thing for this imperfect moment in time. I'm sorry you've had an awful cold, and I hope you feel better soon!

(P.S. Rumor has it the little blue octopus has a friend that will arrive next week. The resident canine and I very much look forward to meeting her.)
posted by cellar door at 2:10 PM on December 4, 2015 [15 favorites]


Yay! I'm glad it arrived today, zinon! Thanks for the excellent photography. I stayed up far too late on Tuesday making the fruitcake (which will likely be part of my cookie swap as well) so I was prepared to be annoyed if my work to meet the deadline was for naught.

BTW, yeah, there's nuts everywhere in that package, including in the fruitcake. There is also booze (two boozes, technically) in the fruitcake. And like all the dried fruits. Basically, if you have allergies, this box was the worst.
posted by maryr at 2:27 PM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


My gift is now in the mail! Winging its way westward to my quonsee. It should arrive Monday or Tuesday. Last year I found that one of the unexpectedly great parts of this Secret Quonsar game was obsessively tracking the package. So that's the bit I'm on now!
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 2:48 PM on December 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


Just got home from dropping off a friend to find a long, narrow box in the mailbox. What could it be? Holding off on opening it quite yet, but we'll see how long that lasts!
posted by lharmon at 3:03 PM on December 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


I only posted my gift yesterday and tracking says it's already been delivered! I take back everything I've ever said about you, Royal Mail.
posted by billiebee at 3:08 PM on December 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


I checked the porch at about 4:30, and there was no mail.
The mail usually comes around 3:00, and any UPS-type things arrive by then, too.

Imagine, then, my surprise when I opened the door at 5:30 and, thanks to the dark and my talking to a roommate on the way out, I stepped on a Thing on my Doorstep.

A Thing with my name on it.

Turns out the box was enough bigger than its contents that the gift inside was totally unharmed. I didn't kill any marmosets.

Yet.

All of which to say,

Rock Steady got me Cthulhu Gloom! A gibbering and abominable version of a card game I'd almost forgotten about, but always wanted to try. Well, now I can, with added insanity.

Sort of appropriate it should come mysteriously, not-entirely-expectedly, under cover of night...

Thanks, Rock Steady! Joyful Quonsmas!
posted by Mister Moofoo at 3:15 PM on December 4, 2015 [4 favorites]


I have been quonsed, but someone else has the package so I can't get it until after work. In the meantime, I am, y'know, mildly excited.
posted by delight at 3:21 PM on December 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


Guys, Quansmas is just the best.
I've gotten joy out of shopping for my delightful Quansee, I've gotten joy out of obsessively and anxiously waiting for the package to arrive, I've gotten immense joy out of her reaction to the gift (and the pictures of her dog), I've gotten often teary-eyed joy out of reading this delightful thread, and I'm reveling in the ABSOLUTELY EXQUISITE joy of waiting for my own Quansurpise.
I am so, so glad I signed up for this.
I am so, so glad that all you humans exist.



Carry on.
posted by Dorinda at 3:37 PM on December 4, 2015 [9 favorites]


I, too, have been quonsed! Thanks to vectorcon systems and spouse! A beautiful card and envelope with an owl and its feathers was lovely
posted by corb at 3:43 PM on December 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


The package is officially in the same state as my quansee. It still says it's going to be delivered today, even though it is already almost 6 pm in that state...I am skeptical, but we shall see.
posted by Sophie1 at 3:46 PM on December 4, 2015


So lovely that I posted without finishing! My family has all tried to claim portions, with varying degrees of success - the kidlet went for the hand boiler, my husband for the vegan beer soap, and even the puppy tried to run off with a precious precious fabric square! (He was, of course, not successful). They are marvelous, and the blue and white one is PERFECT for finishing a quilt I've been piecing together for ages! Thank you again, and sorry for the cutoff that tried to rob you of your praise due!
posted by corb at 3:47 PM on December 4, 2015 [3 favorites]


This is killing me. Tracking says expected delivery date is today, however the last status/location logged was on the opposite side of the country, on Wednesday.
posted by spinturtle at 3:50 PM on December 4, 2015


I've gotten immense joy out of her reaction to the gift (and the pictures of her dog)

I and my family -- most def including my cheese obsessed dog -- have gotten ongoing immense joy out of all your thoughtful presents, Dorinda! And I love this thread too.

It makes up for the fact that I quonsed weeks ago and my SQ has not posted here or anywhere in Mefi land ever since -- coincidence isn't causation, right?
posted by bearwife at 3:53 PM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


I was quonsed tonight! Lynsey sent me a package with an adorable little Quonsmas carol, some great-smelling coffee that I can't wait to drink, and a very cute travel mug. I was seriously thinking about how I needed one more travel mug to get through my work week and almost bought one tonight. Quonsmas miracles! Here's a pic of everything, plus a cameo by Dog #3 .
posted by Fig at 3:56 PM on December 4, 2015 [4 favorites]


Anonymous quonsar,
Right now, you are my favorite person in the known universe. Your gift (tote and ornament) was so amazingly perfect that I was hopping around my house and shouting at its tentacular awesomeness as I opened it. I cannot believe that an internet stranger was able to gaze into my eldritch heart and perfectly suss out what it desired. The festive octostamping on the outside of the package rocked my socks, too. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
posted by batbat at 4:07 PM on December 4, 2015 [5 favorites]


That octopus is hot.
posted by heyho at 4:16 PM on December 4, 2015 [4 favorites]


Ooh in a karmic circle I got home late tonight to find that I have been Quonsed! But I missed the enquonsening so I have to wait til Monday to collect my parcel. Thank you in advance beloved SQ, rest assured it has arrived and I will be squeeing here in due course.
posted by billiebee at 4:36 PM on December 4, 2015


I arrived home today to find a package wedged into my mailbox! Apparently the package had the exact same width as the mailbox, but my mail carrier managed to get it in somehow and eventually I got it out unharmed.

Inside, I found a lovely card and an awesome sounding game - I am so excited to play it! I am always up for new games, and fact that this is played with cards & not with small pieces is a big bonus, because it means my cats are way less likely to "help" us play.

Yay, thank you so much anonymous-ish Quonsar! I saw your presumably real name on the card but am not going to write it in case you don't want it online, and I don't see your mefi name. THANK YOU AND HAPPY QUONSMAS!
posted by insectosaurus at 4:43 PM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


This year is my very first Quonsar exchange, and I'm so glad I signed up, despite being insanely busy with work at the moment. My extended family doesn't do Christmas gifts anymore, so making a list and then getting such a thoughtful present was really a delight.

My children were very taken by the whole "secret gift in the mail from a stranger" thing so we opened my package together, oohed and aahed over the clever little buttons sewn with rainbow thread, the delicious salted caramels from Olivier's, and at the bottom, the squishiest turquoise wool, smelling of lanolin, from the yarn store Stash in Calgary.

Thank you so so much, anonymous mefite! The yarn is something I never would have thought to buy for myself, but I quickly found a few great patterns and knit up this drop stitch cowl and am now working on a pair of slippers that will feature the new buttons. I will think of you whenever I wear them!

So this has been a highlight of my holiday season. Thank you metafilter and Quonsar organizers for making all this gifty goodness possible!
posted by alicat at 4:50 PM on December 4, 2015 [7 favorites]


exceptinsects, you are the loveliest!! Thank you so, so much :D. I wasn't expecting my parcel to be delivered until Monday (which would mean I wouldn't get it until Friday) and today has been spectacularly irritating and grumpymaking

BUT

when I came home from work and opened the screen door, a parcel plunked onto my feets and I made myself wait until I had fed and I was less scowly before I opened it, and I got a waft of gorgeous coffee, and then saw the lovely tin and the note, and reading the note I found out that the tin had moar things in and I opened the tin and lo! there were beautiful Japanese printed hanky-towel textiles!!!

Thank you thank you thank you!!! Both to exceptinsects and to the Quonsmas elves for individually and collectively bringing light and joy to a dark season holy crow it just occurred to me that the poor antipodeans need a Secret Quonsar in June ok nevermind I'm going to go be cheerful and cosy and grateful and sleepy while not typing anymore
posted by you must supply a verb at 5:09 PM on December 4, 2015 [3 favorites]


Eeee! I have been quonsed! I didn't see a name on the package, so I'm not sure if I missed it or my SQ is anon, but THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I got some absolutely delicious barley candies, a Vosges (YES) chocolate bar in chestnut honey almond that sounds fantastic, and two horror books I have lusted after but did not yet own (how did you know??!): Goth by Otsuichi and Junji Ito's Fragments of Horror collection. I picked up Goth in the bookstore literally yesterday and thought, oh, I want to buy this! Thank you, SQ, you knocked this out of the park! I am going to have the best holiday of reading and snacking ever.
posted by thetortoise at 5:59 PM on December 4, 2015


The Quonsar elves notified me that my package is scheduled to arrive on Tuesday! Alas--I need to go to work on Tuesday and I won't be able to wait by my window watching for the delivery truck.
I had so much fun being a Secret Quonsar that I almost forgot that I'd be getting Quonsed myself! Can't wait!!!
posted by bookmammal at 6:07 PM on December 4, 2015


Tracking says both packages have been delivered as of yesterday!

*sits on hands, frets quietly*
posted by E. Whitehall at 7:05 PM on December 4, 2015


We’ve reached the Peak of Keen Anticipation. This is a period that will last approximately 3 weeks. We counsel patience (but are still happy to follow up for you if it’s been a week since you think it (should have) arrived!)

Whether you are waiting for a gift or a thank you, please be aware that there are many good reasons why you have not gotten them yet. Some excellent reasons we see every year are:
  • Your quonsee or quonsar (or someone in their family) is ill, and there just hasn’t been enough bandwidth.
  • The delivery service whimsically decided to send your package on the scenic route.
  • Vendor shenanigans.
  • Weather. Some of the best laid plans can go awry due to black ice, heavy snowstorms, or flooded streets.
  • Mail Strikes.
  • The package never arrived (Thieves. Delivery service bungling. Eternally stuck in Des Moines.)
  • Work suddenly inexplicably went insane for your quonsee/quonsar and they barely have time to sleep.
  • Customs Services.
  • The local post office has inconvenient hours and they have to pick up the package there.
  • A package has to cross the equator (seriously, add a few days right there.)
  • Your recipient is out of town.
  • Your recipient is saving the box for after a stressful time/week.
  • Your recipient can’t/won’t open the box until Christmas.
  • Major Life Changes (ranging from births to breakups to broken limbs - and worse.)
  • Your quonsee is an introvert or shy about posting in the thank you thread and doesn't realize we'll happily forward thanks if they don't have a MeFi Name.
For the record, these are not examples of good or truthful excuses.
posted by julen at 7:25 PM on December 4, 2015 [9 favorites]


So glad you liked them alicat! That's amazing that you've knitted up something already. I had lots of fun at Stash picking out the yarn and buttons for you. Happy Quonsmas!
posted by angiep at 7:52 PM on December 4, 2015


The local post office has inconvenient hours and they have to pick up the package there.

I would like to say to my Quonsar that that is totally my issue and that I am actually glad that (as far as I know) no package has yet arrived. I am very well known to my postmaster because I'm the person always showing up with a notice saying I have too much mail to deliver into my PO box, which creates social anxiety when I go pick up my mail, because I think I've been being a bad customer. I have actually gone more often than usual to pick up my mail on the off-chance that my Quonsar package might then fit in my PO box, rather than requiring me to show up at a time when the postmaster (submaster? It's a small post office) is there. Anyway. I am (a) happy that nothing showed up yet, and (b) apologizing in advance if it takes me a while to pick up my gift.
posted by jaguar at 8:03 PM on December 4, 2015 [2 favorites]


Quonsee! My package to you will be mailed TOMORROW!!
posted by sarcasticah at 8:03 PM on December 4, 2015


I have been happily quonsed! Thank you so much, initapplette, for the perfectly-chosen books! I have no idea how you knew that I love The Best American Nonrequired Reading and The Best American Magazine Writing series, and now I have the latest ones to curl up with this winter! Stories and articles and graphic art and poems to read and ponder and maybe even help jumpstart my own becalmed creativity.

The card (and its good wishes) and the wrapping were lovely, and I have pictures to share here.
posted by apartment dweller at 8:11 PM on December 4, 2015 [3 favorites]


cellar door, I'm so glad you liked the package! I'm sorry you were having such an awful week, but I'm glad that Quonsmas was a good pick-me-up. I reminded my mother about 12 times to bring the rest of your package with her tomorrow, so we'll see if she remembers. If not, well, I have an extra crochet hook here. And thanks so much for the photos, especially of your adorable dog!
posted by holborne at 9:06 PM on December 4, 2015


*happy dance* Just got home from work and discovered that my first ever Quonsar package has arrived!!! I just got a gift from a stranger on the internet, how cool is that?!

It's a book! "The Devotion of Suspect X" by Keigo Higashino...I'm so excited to read it, thank you carolr! There is never enough time and energy to find good books to read for fun; gift books are the best. And the "part 1" in your note suggests even more excitement to come. :D Lucky me!!

Possibly even more exciting, my quonsee is due to receive her package TOMORROW! Quonsmas is truly the most joyous of holiday celebrations.
posted by switcheroo at 10:04 PM on December 4, 2015 [1 favorite]


Homg, you guys! I got an absolutely amazing package from my lovely Quonsar, the fabulous catch as catch can. There is a Totoro in the Rain felt/embroidery amazement made just for meeeeeee! And G&T bath gel and puffy cat stickers and a really useful pencil case.

Thank you so much! I'm off to put Totoro in a place of honour. 😻
posted by halcyonday at 2:39 AM on December 5, 2015 [4 favorites]


Thank you so much 15L06 for my lovely gifts! My comments for ideas mentioned I'm a very girly English person living abroad, and I the packages I received had cadbury's chocolate and drinking chocolate to satisfy the British side, and a Sisi fridge magnet and chocolates for the girly side! So beautifully wrapped, including some secret quonsar wrapping paper! This has absolutely made my day.
posted by ellieBOA at 2:46 AM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


Missed a present, yassss marmite!
posted by ellieBOA at 3:34 AM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


That wrapping paper is excellent!
posted by heyho at 5:12 AM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


inspired by more than a few comments in this thread - from this day forward, every unsuspecting quonsee WILL ALSO RECEIVE OCTOPODES.

this must become a Quonsmas-Thing. well, in the spirit of Quonsmas, only if you feel like it.
posted by dorian at 6:20 AM on December 5, 2015 [6 favorites]


I just wanted to thank needlegrrl so much for what is the finest She Hulk bangle in all the land! Also catnip eyeballs that were adorable, and that is now my cat's new favorite thing. And also postcards. Seriously there are some really really cool ones in there!

Also it was all amazingly wrapped and had peppermint bark!
posted by KernalM at 6:41 AM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


This week I received a wonderful Quonsmas package from the incomparable fraula! My wife and I put off opening it for a day but couldn't resist any longer. There were beautifully-wrapped presents and a charming snowglobe card. We dug in and unwrapped the Quonsmas cheer: a super-sparkly Eiffel Tower tree ornament, a genuine TdF shirt that I'm going to proudly show off at the bike club's party this week, a cute little packet of facial tissue, and some astoundingly lovely tea (that I'm enjoying a cup of right now!).

Also included were instructions to deliver for our dogs: "ear scritches, chin rubs, belly pats, and hugs." Since today is Dog Bath Day in the introp household and they currently smell like they've been hanging out with the reindeer all week, I'm putting off delivering those gifts until this evening. :D

(USPS tracking says my outbound Quonsmasing hasn't made it across the border yet. My fingers are crossed for Customs kindness.)

Happy Quonsar, one and all!
posted by introp at 7:15 AM on December 5, 2015 [4 favorites]


In advance, for anyone who Quonses me now or in the future, I'm either going to wait until Christmas Eve or Christmas Day to open it because my immediate family doesn't go in for surprise gifts these days. It's very practical on their end which is admirable and some people might find it super-awesome, but it does take away from the kid-like glee of getting gifts.

As for my Quonsee, the package left my area today early in the morning yesterday and I think they'll have a nice package waiting for them at their co-work space on Monday or Tuesday. (Yes, I google-stalked the address because I used to live/work near there.)
posted by TrishaLynn at 8:22 AM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


My personal rule with regards to unwrapping quonsgifts: I have to wait until I have fulfilled my own quonsing duties.
I'm thrilled to report that it's done and my order is in with a reliable Etsy person. Watch the postbox extra hard, Canadians!

So now I can finally thank Valleys for the box of robotic good vibes. When it got here, my partner asked "Is this the annual robot gift from the Internet?" and it was! A QUONSMAS TRADITION IS BORN.
posted by Freyja at 9:06 AM on December 5, 2015 [4 favorites]


Many thanks to my anonymous secret quonsar! My delightfully orange hat is soft and warm and oh-so-orange and I love it to pieces. I'm wearing it right now, in fact, as my office is slow to heat on weekends. I might never take it off. Except to shower. And in the summer. Even on Metafilter, where my profile pic is now me in my new orange hat. It is a merry Quonsmas indeed!

And to my Canadian recipient - the Quonsar elves tell me your packages should arrive mid-week.

Happy Quonsar everyone!
posted by okayokayigive at 9:10 AM on December 5, 2015 [4 favorites]


After not updating the tracking info since I dropped off the package a few days ago, USPS says my gift will be delivered today, 2 days ahead of schedule! I really hope that everything in the box is intact, and that Quonsee enjoys it. Fingers crossed!
posted by Fig at 10:08 AM on December 5, 2015


Thanks to my Quonsar for the yummy chocolates! Perfect Hanukkah timing.
posted by thomas j wise at 10:36 AM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Ok, my husband says I have a package at the mail drop! Of course, I'm not going to be home until late tonight, wouldn't you know it. Damn it!
posted by holborne at 11:08 AM on December 5, 2015


I want to apologize in advance to my quonsee for not wrapping my present to her. I was so worried about getting it into the mail on time and fitting it in the box that I just kind of stuffed it in. I'm an awful Quonsar.
posted by patheral at 11:24 AM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


On Thursday, I received a wonderful box o'Portland, OR from mimo, who took my quirky guidance and worked some Quonsar magic! The fun started with a Bigfoot postcard (I do love me some Sasquatch!) and progressed to funny stickers (yes, bunnies for MeCha!), a Portland magnet, and a notepad titled "Life," leaving its usage wide open! Also, I can't wait to use the Oregon rain soap (herbal-scented), and eat the marionberry gummy grizzlies (purple- a nod to my avowed love for the secondary color wheel). She also saw fit to send some handmade felt coasters with a spiral design, and a handmade 4-color knitted coffee cozy (again, gotta love that secondary color wheel!).

Thank you, mimo! I am so happy to head toward 2016 having experienced your thoughtfulness.
posted by initapplette at 11:37 AM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Quonsmus is here! Quonsmus is here! I got a cool T-shirt and a Welsh Terrier calendar (which is pretty much impossible to find in a store!) from heyho! Thanks so much! : )
posted by SisterHavana at 12:06 PM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


You're so welcome, SisterHavana!
I read the comment from patheral above and did a forehead slap when I realized I also forgot to wrap my outgoing sq gifts! Durrrr.

posted by heyho at 12:27 PM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


initapplette, I'm so glad you are pleased! I had so much fun putting together your gift! This was my first time participating and I do not think it will be my last.
posted by mimo at 12:44 PM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have been quonsed so hard! Thank you, IndigoRain! I came home from my run this afternoon to the most perfect box of things (pardon my mess). She cunningly deduced that I might like Neko Atsume (correct; I have treasures from all but one cat) and I am all stocked up on happy Japanese snacks now!

Also, to answer your question, it was William Hartnell in the box!
posted by bowtiesarecool at 12:46 PM on December 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


I have been quonsed! The wonderful Sophie1 sent me a lovely box of goodies including honey from her hives (!!!!!), chocolate, homemade cranberry apple butter, and a fabulous black cat pin. Best of all, she has shamelessly enabled my lust for paper ephemera, including postcards and a glorious pamphlet full of canned salmon recipes which promises hours of delight. The magic salmon mold as part of the refreshing summer menu alone...I cannot even. I am jumping up and down with excitement! Thank you, Sophie1!
posted by PussKillian at 1:40 PM on December 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


Hooray! I have been quonsed with alacrity by the wonderful duffell! I got the package a couple of days ago, but waited to open it until I had sent my own SQ gift off (bad news is I was a couple of days late mailing, the good/bad news is I was inspired by the recent Turkish Delight thread to add a little something more, "enjoy" the Big Turk bar).

I got a pair of wonderful things; the first is a fascinating coffee table type book about an imaginary city created in meticulous detail by an autistic Frenchman, Urville. The second is a pocket microscope; the note attached to it read "This thing is SUPER COOL", but that's something of an understatement. It's awesome! I've been looking at all sorts of things in close up all morning! FABRIC IS AMAZING AT 40x MAGNIFICATION!

Thank you, duffell! Merry Quonsmas!
posted by Homeboy Trouble at 2:11 PM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


Yay! I'm so glad everything made it to you! I realized I had forgotten to write FRAGILE on the box after i dropped it off, so, success! Happy quonsmas!
posted by Sophie1 at 2:20 PM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yay! Glad you enjoy your Quonsmas cheer, introp!

a super-sparkly Eiffel Tower tree ornament

According to the shop it's a keychain (but ornament also works!), and it's made of the same stuff used in bike reflectors *grin*
posted by fraula at 2:24 PM on December 5, 2015


I have received notification that I have a package awaiting! My post office is closed on weekends, though, and I think Tuesday or Wednesday will be the first time I can get there during business hours.
posted by jaguar at 2:57 PM on December 5, 2015


I got my Quonsmas gift the other day and I love it! My Quonsar hit on everything I mentioned which is really impressive! I got some nice fish to try, a new kitchen towel, some really fun little games to try out and some fantastic coffee! My ToddlerPerson was so excited when I opened the package because, "someone sent me bubble poppers!". She immediately grabbed all the bubble wrap and air cushions and happily popped them while I got to open my package in peace, everybody won! Thank you so much!
posted by julie_of_the_jungle at 3:17 PM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


Gifts have arrived
Meow from Buddy
Many thanks from waviolet!
posted by waviolet at 4:11 PM on December 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


I've been Quonsed! The package arrived last night, and I probably should have waited until Hanukkah so I'd have something to unwrap, but maxwelton sent me a not-so-secret preview/tracking number so I could watch my package traverse the continent like a cartoon road trip in a 1930's movie, and I was just too excited. There will be a private and properly-written thank you note, but I was entirely, delightfully quonsed with practical and aesthetically-pleasing items that fit my personality, including a Moleskine set in a color and size that is inspiring me to achieve some kind of greatness. But best of all was an absolutely enchanting note from my secret quonsar, himself, that made me feel all magical and spirit-of-the-season-y.
posted by The Wrong Kind of Cheese at 5:45 PM on December 5, 2015 [3 favorites]


Sort of appropriate it should come mysteriously, not-entirely-expectedly, under cover of night...

Thanks, Rock Steady! Joyful Quonsmas!


I had to pay extra for delivery by Ghast. Glad you like it! Merry Quonsmas!
posted by Rock Steady at 7:26 PM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have to thank LyssaBee for the tremendous box of gifts. The books are both amazing, and I already stayed up way past my bedtime last night getting a good bit read from one of them (the one you said is like Cheryl Strayed - it's so good so far!)

Also some really useful and adorable office supplies from staples, a manicure kit, and some delicious dark grey yarn - a perfect color for me.

Thanks so much. I also loved the little notes you taped to everything, and the wrapping paper. This really made the end of a pretty difficult work week so much nicer.
posted by sockermom at 7:58 PM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


I am the worst quonsar failure in the history of the worst quonsar failures ever. I missed the deadline bigtime. But I blame a dead laptop, unrecoverable passwords, Australia's exorbitant pricing of something I could get for half the price from OS so I ordered it from OS and then panicked when it was late arriving, and just to fuck up my week even further, I was notified that I didn't get either of two jobs I'd applied for, one of which I desperately wanted and one of which I kinda wanted.

Then Saturday (yesterday) came, I got a new laptop, powered my way through restoring passwords (most of which were linked to a long-dead email address, of course), I could get my Quonsee's real name and address, the OS parcel finally arrived, and then I happened upon a little something extra that I hope my Quonsee can put to good use and enjoy.

(Oh, and then I found out I actually got the job I kinda wanted, so the universe didn't entirely fuck me over.)

It'll be in the mail first thing tomorrow, Aussie Quonsee. You'll have it by the end of the week.
posted by malibustacey9999 at 9:52 PM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


malibustacey9999, I think that not only are you NOT "the worst" SQ failure, what you've been through doesn't even rate as failure. Getting a gift out to your Quonsee—especially with the time you've had—is a roaring SUCCESS.

Barring folks who just ignore Quonsmas after committing to it (and folks who let the SQ Elves know that Life snucked up and sat on Quonsmas this year is not the same as ignoring Quonsmas) I don't think there's such a thing as SQ fail. I think you'd really have to work at it, like only sending your Quonsee a used tissue in February with a note that says, "Couldn't be bothered. So there."

I'm sure there are occasional incongruencies: the teetotal MeFite is sent a collection of miniature bottles of whisky, the MeFite with nut allergies gets a batch peanut brittle, someone hoping for a marmoset gets a marmot instead. But that's not the same as failing Quonsmas (although the marmoset is against the Rules). That's just what happens when you mix together random internets. And half the fun of Quonsmas is accepting that not only will there be randomness, it will be very special MetaFilter randomness, which is simply awesomeness that hasn't had a chance to put on its outdoor shoes yet.

But sending out a gift to your Quonsee—nay, persisting in sending out a gift against odds stacked a few metres high—makes you a Secret Quonsar hero. As are we all.
posted by angiep at 10:34 PM on December 5, 2015 [24 favorites]


Today I got a package sent via THE INTERNET with some fancy black tea that is already steeping, a beautiful manuscript postcard, VANILLA SALT (a thing I have longed for for years!) and, last but never least, a Discworld book with the kind of wonderful, insane vintage cover I love the most featuring a CAMEL and PYRAMIDS. There might even be a part two but obviously I have been moved to caps lock because this is already AMAZING. Thank you, kind Quonsar!!
posted by jetlagaddict at 10:46 PM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


Hi switcheroo! Yay, I'm glad you're excited about the book. And yes, one more small thing is on its way.

For my quonsar, I'm actually on vacation right now so won't get to the post office to check for parcels until early next week. And that's exciting to have something to look forward to after my vacation is done!
posted by carolr at 11:03 PM on December 5, 2015 [1 favorite]


I actually managed to get all the store-bought parts of my SQ gift before Thanksgiving, but it's taken me this long to get the homemade part done, what with working until after midnight four days this week, and until after 3 two of them.

So, Saturday I dragged my butt out of bed, made the homemade gift, packed everything up, and... missed the post office. I had slept just a little too late to make it on time.

It'll go in the mail Monday, then I'll be able to open the lovely SQ gift I received

Sincerely,
Literally the last person sending an SQ gift this year
posted by zorseshoes at 11:21 PM on December 5, 2015


In my "guidance", if you can call my time-cube-esque ramblings that, I mentioned if my quonsar made something, I would love an example of whatever that might be--assuming that the time or materials burden wasn't too onerous.

I think wenestvedt ignored that qualification and I am grateful they did! I cannot imagine how much time must have gone into the amazing hand-made haul I received. Check it out.

That is a charming hand-carved wooden spoon (!) and a couple of beautiful examples of knot work (!!). The key ring was burdened with my keys seconds after this photo was taken...now I feel like I need better keys. As someone who has tried carving (I'm very bad at it) and has trouble tying his shoes, I'm humbled and amazed. Lovely work, and I'm honored to have received it. Many, many thanks, wenestvedt!

A most excellent Quonsmas to each and all!
posted by maxwelton at 11:36 PM on December 5, 2015 [2 favorites]


Lovely gifts received from bowtiesarecool. Off to the store for ice cream and strawberries to use with my new fig infused vinegar. Yum!
posted by BobtheThief at 4:39 AM on December 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you to the excellent Sister Havana for the magnetic poetry and ornament - Shiny!

I'm looking forward to crafting verse punctuated by inscrutable Chinese curse words all over my office filing cabinet.


My gift to my quonsee is late (because I am The Worst), but goes in the mail today, with an estimated (by USPS) arrival of middle of next week.
posted by jeoc at 5:42 AM on December 6, 2015 [4 favorites]


Excellent quonses have arrived en buena hora from une_heure_pleine, who despite now being local to me, managed to rummage around in her bag of tricks from her homeland in Melbourne to expand my tea-drinking horizons, (That's not tea. THIS! is tea) along with a charming Swedish Dala horse mug with travel lid (and I am just noting--no handle! so it can go in the microwave AND the cupholder, GENIUS!). And last but not least, cat toys!
posted by drlith at 6:05 AM on December 6, 2015 [3 favorites]


apartment dweller, so glad you like! I do so love matching people with their books! Also, the card is handmade by mr. init-- so until this moment, you also have had a secret secret Quonsar!
posted by initapplette at 6:33 AM on December 6, 2015


Quonsar arrived for me today with the delivery of a most excellent CD of choral music! A very nice surprise indeed for this veteran choral singer. Thank you so much, Daily Alice! I've sung a few of these pieces and know others without having sung them, but a whole bunch of them I don't know and am looking forward to hearing. Thank you, fabulous Quonsar, and Happy Quonsar to all!
posted by holborne at 7:19 AM on December 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


Barring folks who just ignore Quonsmas after committing to it (and folks who let the SQ Elves know that Life snucked up and sat on Quonsmas this year is not the same as ignoring Quonsmas) I don't think there's such a thing as SQ fail. I think you'd really have to work at it, like only sending your Quonsee a used tissue in February with a note that says, "Couldn't be bothered. So there."

I'm sure there are occasional incongruencies: the teetotal MeFite is sent a collection of miniature bottles of whisky, the MeFite with nut allergies gets a batch peanut brittle, someone hoping for a marmoset gets a marmot instead. But that's not the same as failing Quonsmas (although the marmoset is against the Rules). That's just what happens when you mix together random internets. And half the fun of Quonsmas is accepting that not only will there be randomness, it will be very special MetaFilter randomness, which is simply awesomeness that hasn't had a chance to put on its outdoor shoes yet.

But sending out a gift to your Quonsee—nay, persisting in sending out a gift against odds stacked a few metres high—makes you a Secret Quonsar hero. As are we all.


I want to quote and copy AngieP's post for emphasis here. She is so right!
posted by julen at 7:26 AM on December 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


Homeboy Trouble, so glad you enjoyed your Quonsening! I think my favorite thing to view at 40x so far has been my MacBook Air screen while Netflix is on. OMG LOOK AT HOW MONITORS WORK! So cool.
posted by duffell at 7:28 AM on December 6, 2015


Thank you Secret Quonsar for my lovely earrings! They are so delicate and beautiful, I love them. Merry Quonsmas!
posted by oflinkey at 8:13 AM on December 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


Awwww, maxwelton, you're too kind -- if I had a stone, I'd kick it bashfully and stare at the ground, mumbling.

Carving spoons is actually one of the most relaxing things I do these days: I think that having to focus on the sharp knife and the careful motions clears out my head. Give it a try again, man!

The wood for the spoon came from a Bradford Pear tree in my BiL's front yard that shed a limb this summer; it carves easily, and a little mineral oil brings out its pretty grain. (I am not sure when you need to add any oil -- maybe when the surface looks/feels dry? Send it back if it gets rough and I will do a complimentary tune-up!)

And I am glad you like the knots. They're fun, too. (You should see my dog leashes: they ruin my hands, but are great to make.)
posted by wenestvedt at 8:22 AM on December 6, 2015 [2 favorites]


I think wenestvedt ignored that qualification and I am grateful they did! I cannot imagine how much time must have gone into the amazing hand-made haul I received. Check it out.

I very much want to check it out, but there is no link!

I don't think there's such a thing as SQ fail. I think you'd really have to work at it, like only sending your Quonsee a used tissue in February with a note that says, "Couldn't be bothered. So there."

Um, brb, need to make a quick shopping trip.
posted by mudpuppie at 9:35 AM on December 6, 2015 [3 favorites]


sockermom, I had a lot of fun picking out your quonsmas gifts - I'm glad you like them! (Especially the books - like initapplette, I like to put people together with books.)

Sorry you had a rough week! But glad I could help perk it up a bit.
posted by lyssabee at 9:44 AM on December 6, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thanks to KernalM I have been Quonsed with a beautiful tiny enameled copper bowl. I can't get a decent photo because PNW natural light at this time of day and year is uncooperative and the flash just makes it glare. Maybe this afternoon. Thank you, KernalM!
posted by monopas at 10:03 AM on December 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


holborne, so glad you like the CD! I'm a singer too and I love listening to choral music, especially contemporary stuff.
posted by Daily Alice at 10:40 AM on December 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


People, the hands with which I'm typing this paragraph have never looked so stylish and cool, for they are ensconced in the softest, most beautifully knit fingerless gloves on the planet, thanks to the excellent mollymayhem! Thank you so much for the most delightful pair of gloves I have EVER owned. The rich red is a favorite color of mine, and the gloves fit perfectly. They're warm but not bulky, and make me feel hip just by wearing them. They are, in short, perfect!

Thanks for making my Quonsmas a grand one, mollymayhem!
posted by but no cigar at 11:27 AM on December 6, 2015 [4 favorites]


Kudos to my SQ Nikita Nikita for turning out a delightful gift in the face of a rather open-ended (and frankly not very helpful) prompt from me. The letterpress stationery is lovely and rulers are always great - even more so when decorated with handy trivia. The ultra-US varieties of candy were the perfect welcome home after my travels. Are. I haven't gorged on them yet. Well maybe a little...
posted by janell at 11:41 AM on December 6, 2015 [2 favorites]


Glad you and the cat both liked it, drlith!
posted by une_heure_pleine at 11:57 AM on December 6, 2015


Lucky me, I was quonsed by JAGUAR, who sent me my favorite jarred treats: delicious local ale mustard and chocolate raspberry cabernet fudge along with a sweet handwritten note! I could not be more thrilled. Thank you thank you thank you jaguar :D :D :D
posted by everybody had matching towels at 11:58 AM on December 6, 2015 [3 favorites]


omg there's a truffle in here too

omg
posted by everybody had matching towels at 11:59 AM on December 6, 2015 [11 favorites]


There is indeed no link...how...why? I fail at HTML. These are the hand-made goodies from wenestvedt.
posted by maxwelton at 1:38 PM on December 6, 2015 [3 favorites]


Yay! I'm glad you liked everything, everybody had matching towels. I admit to a bit of internet stalking, which is why I thought mustard and ice-cream toppings might be a hit. :) And the truffle just looked good.
posted by jaguar at 1:53 PM on December 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have been well and truly quonsed by kangaroo! And I feel like I know a bit more about Cleveland now. Y'all in Cleveland like to eat, right? Well, so do I. Belgian chocolate-covered pretzels (which I am tearing through right now), Bertman ballpark mustard, Chagrin Falls kettle corn, Humphrey candy kisses, Belgian dark chocolate with sea salt, and a huge old-timey lollipop! Thank you for helping further my regional snack education!
posted by ImproviseOrDie at 1:54 PM on December 6, 2015 [3 favorites]


Well, my first Secret Quonsar experience has been mind-blowingly great, thanks to Captain_Science! In a gorgeously-packed box, I discovered a beautiful, framed piece of festive cross-stitch, HOMEMADE vanilla extract that smells distractingly good, a set of neon markers with MONSTER FACES on them, and a copy of Randall Munroe's /Thing Explainer/.

I am so excited that I actually don't know what to do right now. I feel as though I'm on the verge of going on another enspousening rampage. This is all just THE BEST.
posted by Hellgirl at 3:18 PM on December 6, 2015 [2 favorites]


Fig! Griphus has asked us to pass on the following message of quonsical joy!

a few months ago my wife and i were getting tattooed and as it was her turn, I was talking to the off-duty artist about food and we were having just your standard 'everything in NYC is the best' conversation until we got to hot dogs. NYC hot dogs are ... unexciting at best. If you have nostalgia for them (like I do) they're a treat but unlike most regional variations on the hot dog they're pretty boring to the point of possibly unappealing.

this is why I got super excited when my quonsar gift from Fig! It is everything I need to make a Chicago-style hot dog, as well as some treats for Apple and a very nice card ! We are gonna have Chicago-style hot dogs this week and it is going to be so, so rad. Thank you again, Fig!
posted by arcticseal at 3:25 PM on December 6, 2015 [7 favorites]


Thankyou Secret Quonsar! The chocolates (part 2) arrived first and were awesome! And then part 1 arrived and I was blown away by the awesome scarf. My god, what a lovely bit of work that is. Also, fabulous colour choice, by the way!
posted by ninazer0 at 5:32 PM on December 6, 2015 [2 favorites]


I was grousing to my husband this morning that I was in the worst stage of Quonsmas-- I mailed my gift over a week ago and hadn't heard a peep from the recipient, and I hadn't received anything. Grump grump grump.

But then... even though it's Sunday and we don't usually get mail... a package arrived! From Hawaii! Despite having given literally no guidance, my secret quonsar sent me the best quonsmas gifts I've received in four years of participation! A beautiful bell for my bike (yes!) and an awesome leather hand strap for my camera (hand crafted!). I hate the neck strap on my camera and recently took it off-- now I have a hand strap! So cool. Thanks a million!
posted by bonheur at 5:38 PM on December 6, 2015 [2 favorites]


Quonsed! So nicely! By areaperson, new like me to these festivities! I got some sweet truck: a red pen far nicer than the kind I usually make do with; two fantastic old field guides ("The Golden Science Guide to Zoology" especially is right up my alley--really beautiful & hilarious 1950s illustrations); chocolate-covered almonds, which, yum; a no-nonsense calendar that's going up in my workspace tomorrow; and some excellent scratch-&-sniff stickers my kid is gonna love. Thanks, areaperson! That package was a real treat.

Will say again: Secret Quonsar swap is terrific. It's all so cheery and polite! Checking in on this thread has been delightful & encouraging on some pretty dark days. Rock on, quonsars all!
posted by miles per flower at 6:16 PM on December 6, 2015 [4 favorites]


I forgot to look for this thread! thomas j wise sent me a lovely kit for a tillandsia air garden and I promise to do my best to keep it alive and happy. Thank you so much!
posted by casarkos at 6:28 PM on December 6, 2015 [1 favorite]


Hmm. My package was delivered to my Quonsee on Friday. USPS says "Delivered, Front Desk/Reception, December 4, 2015, 10:54 am" - but I haven't heard anything yet. Now I'm a bit anxious - did the marmosets escape from the box?
posted by RedOrGreen at 8:54 PM on December 6, 2015


You are most welcome, Sweetie Darling. I couldn't believe how fast it got to you either. I was afraid that even though I'd met the due date, it might arrive so late that it would be a problem! Glad you enjoyed them. I'm already looking forward to next Quonsar.
posted by Gotanda at 1:43 AM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Glad you liked it Janell! It was fun picking stuff out. Happy Quonsmas!
posted by NikitaNikita at 3:57 AM on December 7, 2015


Not sure of my SQ's username, but I received three delicious smelling bags of coffee from K.

Thanks so very much. It is very much appreciated & I look forward to drinking it. We recently got a new espresso percolator, so the espresso beans are especially apropos.
posted by Laura in Canada at 5:09 AM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


I have been wonderfully, WONDERFULLY quonsed! Effusive details will follow when work permits...
THANK YOUUUU!!!
posted by probably not that Karen Blair at 6:17 AM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


I came home to find a missed delivery notice in my mailbox - I'm assuming it's from my Secret Quonsar as the post office very helpfully filled in the "sender" portion of the notice as being from 外国 (foreign country). I've requested a re-delivery tomorrow after I get home from work, so I'll be back here again later.
posted by emmling at 6:23 AM on December 7, 2015


By when should I be worried that I haven't received my Quonsar gift yet? :(
posted by schleppo at 6:32 AM on December 7, 2015


Never. It's not going to help it turn up sooner, after all.
posted by Too-Ticky at 6:38 AM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


By when should I be worried that I haven't received my Quonsar gift yet? :(

We generally start sending out requests for status updates next week to folks for whom we have no status (sent/received) next week. If you'd like to hop higher on our randomly chosen (The hamsters are back! And this time they're knocking on doors!) list of folks we're contacting each day, drop us an email next week.

There are LOTS of good reasons why a gift hasn't arrived yet (and a few bad ones), and I counsel patience. There are lots of folks still waiting for gifts (including me!).
posted by julen at 6:47 AM on December 7, 2015


Monday Morning Statistics!

437 participants

172   presents have already arrived (39.2%!)
  10   presents have been marked as delayed (although a subset are probably already en route) (2.2%)
  79   are known to be in transit (18.1%)
  09   might have arrived; we’re awaiting confirmation (2.1%)
  06   other presents have notes associated (running late notes, anonymized questions, etc) (1.3%)
167   gifts are a mystery to us. We have no status from quonsar or quonsee. (38.2%)

  21   number of countries packages will be sent from, delivered to, or end up in
  06   people have gotten their gift but are saving it to open later!
  29   different animals represented in gifts (that we know about) so far
  31   gifts (that we know about) have included books so far
  01  mail strikes have occurred this year.
posted by julen at 7:00 AM on December 7, 2015 [8 favorites]


By when should I be worried that I haven't received my Quonsar gift yet? :(

There are wonderful people standing ready to send you a gift in case (for whatever reason) the one from your original Quonsarer never shows up. You will get a gift, because people are awesome.

That said, it's still only a week after the shipping deadline at the busiest time of the year in general and shipping in particular. There's plenty of time before you should start worrying.
posted by Gygesringtone at 8:36 AM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


Aaaaaand I just noticed that in my post above, I kept saying "Quonsar" when I meant "Quosmas." It's probably stupid to be mortified, but I am. I feel like I kept calling someone by the wrong name at a cocktail party or something. My only excuse is that it's my first Quonsmas.
posted by holborne at 9:49 AM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


julen, you can move one from "no status" to "in transit."
posted by zennie at 9:55 AM on December 7, 2015


@holborne

It sort of is Secret Quonsar... but people say Quonsmas as well and some even have different spellings.

It really doesn't matter. Just have fun!
posted by Laura in Canada at 9:58 AM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


Quonsee, your package is finally in the mail! The kind man at the post office told me that it should be delivered by Thursday, so keep an eye out for it!

And so my [package tracking] watch begins...
posted by MsVader at 10:04 AM on December 7, 2015


Package tracking shows expected delivery today! I am filled with both excitement and apprehension as it heads for my quonsee....
posted by nubs at 10:10 AM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


I didn't do package tracking and feel like a dork because of it. I mailed my quonsee's gift last Monday via priority mail. I hope it made it there safely!
posted by ImproviseOrDie at 11:05 AM on December 7, 2015


I have been royally and wonderfully QUONSED by hansbrough!

I don’t even know which part of my package to share first because everything is PERFECT! I received: some decadent-looking sipping cocoa mix from Trader Joe’s (I LOVE Trader Joe’s and have bought hot chocolate there several times but somehow have never seen this exact kind!), some ADORABLE buttons designed especially for booklovers, an assortment of great bookmarks (one is a Lincoln [!] postcard but I'll be using it as a bookmark), BOOKISH SOCKS (so, so perfect—I can’t even describe how perfect these are) and last but in NO WAY LEAST—you guys, hansbrough WOVE A PERSONALIZED BOOKMARK for me!!!!!

Photos of all are here. Hansbrough, you are the QUEEN of all that is QUONSMAS!!!!

This was my first Quonsmas and I honestly don’t know which part I found the most fun—waiting anxiously to find out who I would be Quonsing, picking out my Quonsar’s gift, reading all the thank you posts, or receiving my own PERFECT PACKAGE OF QUONSAR GOODNESS (well, OK--that last one was probably the most fun part!). Big thanks to everyone who helps to organize this each year—what a great tradition! (Hansbrough—I’m going to memail you in a few minutes)
posted by bookmammal at 11:10 AM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


For animals associated with gifts, mine had an owl on the pencil crayon (not sure if you got that) and my dog was mentioned by name in the card.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 11:22 AM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


(package is out for delivery!)
posted by ChuraChura at 11:44 AM on December 7, 2015


For those who are curious, this is my list of animals represented so far:

Group of 4+ Different Animals
Fish
Bunny
Ladybug
Dog
Monkey
Dinosaurs
Wombat
Octopus
Alligator
Banana Slugs
Geoducks
Mice
Dragons
Deer
Pig
Sheep
Unicorn
Cardinal
Koi
Llama
[redacted until my quonsee checks in]
[redacted until my quonsee checks in]
Slug
Whale
Owl
Cat
Generic bird
Horse

If you got an animal not represented on this list, let me know!
posted by julen at 12:01 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Julen, I think maybe my wonderful Totoro in the rain could count as an animal too. (He is made out of lovely faux fur, I keep petting him. )
posted by halcyonday at 12:20 PM on December 7, 2015


The post office says my quonsee's gift is on/at the front door/porch and has been there a little over four hours. I'm giddy with anticipation!
posted by The Wrong Kind of Cheese at 12:57 PM on December 7, 2015


Oh, Julen, while I didn't mention it, my gift included representations of:

woodpecker
orca
seabird of indeterminate description (but probably only because I don't know anything about seabirds, especially when illustrated on magnets)
posted by The Wrong Kind of Cheese at 1:00 PM on December 7, 2015


I JUST GOT A PACKAGE IN THE MAIL! It is filled with my favorite things: THE MOST AMAZING COOKIES! So many of them!! So many! And a scarf! Not just any scarf, one of those fancy round ones that's thick and cozy and like wearing a hug around my neck. It's so lovely.

Thank you so much Secret Quonsar!
posted by ilovewinter at 1:07 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


julen, the package I sent contained images of both bees and chickens.
posted by ocherdraco at 1:35 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm so mad at the post office. My gift was supposed to be delivered to my quonsee today but the tracking hasn't been updated since 12/2, when it was in NJ. (My quonsee lives in CA).

Quonsee, when you know who you are, please know that I will send you new fresh cookies (LOTS of cookies) in January, when the post office has hopefully regulated itself. :(
posted by firei at 1:46 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


I am still trying to catch a marmot, but I will hand-deliver since Quonsee lives nearby!
posted by mochapickle at 1:49 PM on December 7, 2015


> julen, the package I sent contained images of both bees and chickens.

Whoa, whoa, wow. I missed the words "images of" the first couple times I read that.
posted by duffell at 1:50 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


I don't see "10,000 live wolf spiders" on that list and my package is out for delivery, so prepare to update it!

In my defense they did say "go nuts."
posted by bondcliff at 1:53 PM on December 7, 2015 [8 favorites]


Yay!
The PO here said my package would arrive on the 4th, but I checked the tracking just now, and it's "out for delivery" as of about lunchtime today.
Pins and needles. Things fall apart; it's scientific.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 2:15 PM on December 7, 2015


And bondcliff: "10,000 Live Wolf Spiders" is the name of my new band.

It's a 10,000 Maniacs cover band performed in the style of Warren Zevon.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 2:17 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


I am fairly certain I put a moose card in with the gift I sent out. Mostly because I wanted to write "Happy Quons-moose!"

So, you can add moose to the list.
posted by mollymayhem at 2:18 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


My package included a fox representation. So add that too :)
posted by athenasbanquet at 2:19 PM on December 7, 2015


Oh, and what I sent had two cards: A prairie dog and a songbird of some kind.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 2:28 PM on December 7, 2015


There's a wolf picture in the box I sent out (which according to tracking was delivered on Thursday-- hope it got there okay!)
posted by thetortoise at 2:29 PM on December 7, 2015


Finally have time to update. Don't know my SQ's username, but D in Utah gave me a useful 64 GB flash drive in a clever origami box and a very nice letter. Wasn't that lovely?

The thing is, the more I read the letter the more I kept saying, Oh... Oh!... OH! This is Wonderful!... OH THIS IS WONDERFUL!! as the realization dawned, too good to be true, that it is filled with hours and hours and hours of slow TV! How could D know how I love it? or that the IT department at work busted me for TOO MUCH YOUTUBE "and we don't care that it's slow TV just stop it."

But it gets better: It's all from Norwegian Public Television. How Could D Know the special, tender place Norway holds in my heart? It is Quonsmas Magic. This is a gift that I will cherish and enjoy forever. A gift that made the room all dusty. Thank you soooo much!

(ALSO included homemade chewy chocolate cookies. No words.)
posted by probably not that Karen Blair at 2:30 PM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


My package has gone to the PO, so you can move me into the "in transit" category.

When I get home tonight, I just may open the package I received--or maybe I should wait until my quonsee gets my present.
posted by zorseshoes at 3:09 PM on December 7, 2015


Quonsmas! And DigDoug is the quonsingist quonsor that ever quonsed!

I was in Louisville for the first time a few months ago. We were there for a wedding and didn't have nearly enough time to do all the things we wanted to do. One place I didn't get to is the Louisville Slugger Museum ... but DigDoug sent me a little Louisville slugger bat. While there, we had some bourbon filled chocolates. In a rare and swiftly regretted fit of self control, I didn't bring any home. But DigDoug sent me some. I've backed a bunch of card games on Kickstarter. One I missed was "White Elephant," but DigDoug sent that as well. There's a book I've never read that looks great, but I think my wife is going to grab it to read before I have a chance. And postcards and stickers and a lovely note....

I need to make another trip to Louisville just to buy DigDoug a beer or something. Many thanks for a wonderful Quonsmas!
posted by maurice at 3:25 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


Today I received a package filled and heavy with stationery and hygge joy! Thank you metaphorever! These gifts are spot on! Thank you for entertaining my love of post it notes, and for helping me cultivate hygge at home with the fuzziest of throws and the candles and candle holder. Action shot!
posted by NikitaNikita at 3:44 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


msali, it was totally worth the wait. Check it out! I can now be free to become the unicorn I've always wanted to be, and cannot wait to drink the blood (hot chocolate) of my vanquished foes. Thank you so much for your thoughtful, hilarious, perfect gift!
posted by MsVader at 3:48 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


Many thanks to my Secret Quonsar! In the mail today I received a lovely box full of nifty stuff from New Mexico--a woven basket-container, two coyote figures (add to animal list), a bar of chili chocolate, a scarf, and some tea. We have family in Albuquerque whom we were planning on visiting this month, but couldn't swing the price of airfare. So having gifts from the Southwest was such a wonderful surprise! Thanks again.
posted by chaoticgood at 3:58 PM on December 7, 2015


Amazon has just helpfully notified me that one part of my quonsee's gift has been delivered...and the other two parts will show up...eventually. Probably. Maybe Wednesday? Who knows. When I bought them they were all meant to be delivered today, and then it changed to tomorrow, and..I got nothing. I'm terribly sorry, quonsee.

Also, I realised just now, looking at my order, that I failed to identify myself.

So, uh, if you got a weird Amazon parcel with a gift receipt that has a CLEARLY INCOMPLETE message on it...happy quonsmas from a well-intended natural disaster.
posted by MeghanC at 4:19 PM on December 7, 2015 [6 favorites]


this is my list of animals represented so far

Don't forget Dorinda sent me a bike bell with a BEAR on it. (Wherever did she learn I'm nuts about bears? Or at least My Bear.) I linked to a picture of it in my overly excited thank you comment.
posted by bearwife at 4:25 PM on December 7, 2015


mollymahem: I am fairly certain I put a moose card in with the gift I sent out. Mostly because I wanted to write "Happy Quons-moose!"

I can attest that she totally did just that, and it was fabulous.
posted by but no cigar at 4:55 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


I double checked my email, and the deadline is in fact today ("Your gift should be in the mail on or before December 2") So I don't feel guilty at all (well, I feel a little guilty) for not getting the package into the mail until this morning.

It should show up on Friday, looking forward to knowing if I chose wisely for my Quonsee.
posted by sparklemotion at 1:38 PM on December 2 [3 favorites −] Favorite added! [!]


It showed up today, sparklemotion! Thank you! I'm delighted with the chili powder, sparkly cat toys, and Dutch Blitz card game. You chose wisely!
posted by cheapskatebay at 4:57 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


msali, it was totally worth the wait. Check it out! I can now be free to become the unicorn I've always wanted to be, and cannot wait to drink the blood (hot chocolate) of my vanquished foes.

That cross-stitch is just about the best thing I've ever seen and I want it hanging in my office.
posted by mudpuppie at 5:03 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


I got my gift this weekend from... someone? I either can't suss out what the abbreviated username is, or I'm super bad at guessing what it is. But to Sarah / akhn, thanks so much! I love the book full of comics (and yes, this is the right kind of comics) and the Gundam and the crab chips are AWESOME! Thanks so much! Here's the picture for all y'all.
posted by deezil at 5:04 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Whee, it's Quonsmas! I found a lovely package waiting for me this evening, and inside were so many wonderful things - chocolate from Edinburgh, recipes from Germany (translated!), a set of shiny new colored pencils (what I really really wanted), and a mix CD of music that's all new to me. So exciting! neilb449, you are an outstanding and generous Quonsar. Thank you so much!
posted by dywypi at 5:40 PM on December 7, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thank you everyone for the animal updates! Whee!

Also! If you have gotten your present but are shy/introverted/dedicated to lurking and probably won't post in here, you can always mail us directly - we'll be happy to pass along your thanks for you.
posted by julen at 5:54 PM on December 7, 2015


Bah, my unicorn link didn't work. Try this one.
posted by MsVader at 6:07 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


I just got the loveliest holiday gifts from DingoMutt - a culinary tour of Pittsburgh. I can't wait to try the treats - chocolate covered pretzels, yummy smelling coffee, caramel and cheese popcorn, and the one I am really psyched for, bitter almond cookies. (I LOVE almond!)

Also, my card had a dog on it and my coffee has a goat on it (I LOVE goats!), so I think we have a new animal to add to the list.

Happy Quonsmas one and all!
posted by Neely O'Hara at 6:19 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you Secret Quonsar janell! The hot sauces look delicious, as does the jerky and dhal. Spicy meat, yay! And I have some delicious-smelling cinnamon incense now! I love the Paul Bunyan card, too! This is all so so awesome! Thank you so much!
posted by culfinglin at 6:26 PM on December 7, 2015


The lovely yarn I got is 60% alpaca. Does that count for the animal list?
posted by erloteiel at 7:11 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oooh, that's a good question, erloteiel. My philosophy generally has been:

Is there a picture or depiction of or form of the animal involved in the gift? Count it.

In this model, a delicious bowl of swedish meatballs would not count unless there was a picture of the sheep, pig, and cow (preferably doing the watusi) on the package. I think this would have to remain true of animal byproducts.
posted by julen at 7:38 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yes, you must absolutely add chickens and bees!
posted by Sophie1 at 8:05 PM on December 7, 2015


OMG, thank you to my quonsee, mudpuppie, who gave me the most thoughtful set of gifts! I am an avid collector of soaps and pens (both of which I received in abundance...omg, this Pan Am soap, I am IN LOVE), and I'm going to use the hell out of this beautiful vintage cocoa mug! Thank you, thank you, thank you!
posted by orangutan at 8:20 PM on December 7, 2015


Also, an apology to my quonsar, I had my thing shipped to you from Japan like ten days ago, and I don't know if it's reached you yet, I can't understand this package tracking business, gah.
posted by orangutan at 8:22 PM on December 7, 2015


I have been SECRET QUONSED by a MYSTERY QUONSAR! Visible in this photo are:

Exhibit A. I told my quonsar that I loved coloring books and my quonsar delivered with the lovely Steampunk Fashions Coloring Book! The pictures are so beautiful and will keep me entertained for a long time (and possibly inspire some future outfits of my own).

Exhibit B. I also mentioned loving cute woodland animals and what did I receive but a cute woodland animal infinity scarf! (Just look at their wee little animal faces.) It is made out of the softest soft material my hands have ever touched.

Exhibit C. I did not even need to mention that Archaeopteryx is one of my favorite animals because my quonsar figured it out anyway and got me this glorious little booklet of FEATHERED DINOSAUR TATTOOS. You guys, my SQ is just that good.

In summation, it has been a very happy quonsmas indeed!
posted by capricorn at 8:22 PM on December 7, 2015 [4 favorites]


Also deezil, I think the name you are looking for is Akhu! She is super cool and just more proof that DC area MeFites are the best MeFites.
posted by capricorn at 8:25 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


Very glad you like the stuff, orangutan!
posted by mudpuppie at 8:54 PM on December 7, 2015 [1 favorite]


I got my Quonsed so well by kostia today!

I opened the neatly packed box and first saw this gorgeous scarf in my favorite shades of blue and purple, and a small packet of chocolates, some of which got eaten immediately. Then this Eddie From Ohio CD, fulfilling my request for local music. You had no way of knowing this kostia, but I have fond memories of my older cousin introducing me to Eddie From Ohio, and this is one (technically two) CD of theirs I don't have! This gorgeous notebook, which I will have to find a suitable use for (notes for my zines, maybe?), and a lovely pen to write in it. My cat even got a nice box to head butt out of the deal!

Thank you kostia, truly you are a master of quonsing.
posted by ActionPopulated at 9:00 PM on December 7, 2015 [3 favorites]


I was so excited to get two big parcels today! Thank you key_of_z for the gorgeous Texan cookbooks from Texas! Merry merrimas Gene, merry everything everyone!
posted by stellathon at 9:51 PM on December 7, 2015


Didn't Paul McCartney do a little ditty about Secret Quonsar once? 'Hope of Delivery'?
posted by Too-Ticky at 11:41 PM on December 7, 2015


I've been coming back to this thread pretty much every day to enjoy all the happiness and quonsening. It is so YAY!
posted by sciencegeek at 3:46 AM on December 8, 2015 [10 favorites]


Yay! Today was Quonsmas for me! I managed to get home before the post office attempted to redeliver my package, which came from a mysterious Secret Quonsar who did not leave their MetaFilter name.

Here you can see the contents of my wonderful present - a cute owl that is going to live by my computer and help keep the screen free of spots, a BAYMAX TSUM TSUM (Secret Quonsar, how did you know the baymax run of tsums was a limited release in Japan, and was sold out in the entire country in one day? And that I had completely failed in my quest to get one? I LOVE MY LITTLE BAYMAX SO MUCH THANK YOU!!!!), the two types of snacks I miss the most in Japan (Goldfish crackers! And Reese's Pieces!), AND a nifty candy dispenser to put them in so i won't eat too many at once.

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!

Now I go back to the fun of waiting for the present I sent off last week to arrive at its destination.....
posted by emmling at 3:53 AM on December 8, 2015 [3 favorites]


Just dropping a quick note to say that my gift arrived, is awesome, and will probably result in a larger update and proper thank you later on. I get to build it, load film into it, snap some pictures, develop the film, then post the results. I am very much looking forward to the process! Thanks for a perfect gift that combines many of the things that I love into one delightful retro-future plastic kit 35mm film twin lens reflex camera.
posted by cubby at 6:54 AM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


USPS says that it got delivered to the reception desk yesterday afternoon. Which means it could be picked up today. YAAAAAY!
posted by TrishaLynn at 7:01 AM on December 8, 2015


Ha - fitting that you would have just posted, cubby, because I am here to do the same thing. THank you so much for fulfilling my wish for 'quirky yet functional' with a space pen with a Metafilter-green refill and cherry-wood covered field notes! Although the packagedidn't travel far because we are basically neighbors :) I spent Quonsmas-receiving week in Europe, so it's like you participated in the international gift swap really and have experienced the same delayed notification as if you had sent things to the EU :)

My husband stared at the unopened package all week until I returned (informing me I had received something from 'from the Internet'), which is alllllsooo fitting because he had a space pen many years ago, now lost, and is very excited to borrow mine. And then there's the whole Seinfeld reference....all-in-all, we had the usual fun reunion for my business trips and then also got to geek out about the space pen too! THanks!
posted by Tandem Affinity at 7:04 AM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


p.s. _ i shipped off my gift on 30 November and really did participate in the international gift swapping, so it looks like it is still in en route...
posted by Tandem Affinity at 7:05 AM on December 8, 2015


Thank you, mysterious benefactor! My Secret Quonsar's box came yesterday, including a bunch of very fun-looking games for two (because my wife and I like to go to coffee shops and play tabletop games on dates), a large tome on Mennonite history (because I am one), and a CD of Christmas tunes that I shall put in when cooking tonight, I think.

A fabulous and thoughtful gift, and we're really excited to try the games out!
Thank you, Secret Quonsar...[looks to the sky, eyes full of emotion]
wherever you are
posted by Monster_Zero at 8:27 AM on December 8, 2015 [4 favorites]


Hi Monster_Zero! I was your secret quonsar, but it was my first year and I wasn't 100% sure if I should be secret or not with my name on the package. (I was all worried about what to put on the return address label until I realized "S. Quonsar" would work)

Hope you enjoy the games, the book, and the music!
posted by nubs at 8:48 AM on December 8, 2015 [2 favorites]


Yay! My gift from my secret quonsar arrived yesterday! I am humbled and amazed by how thoughtful and kind it is. It included an assortment of goodies from my secret quonsar's town, all of which are things I noted I like. It included 4 pint glasses from a local brewery, several postcards and stickers, some amazing tea, and biscuits made from spent beer grains for my doggy!

As I mentioned, they were all made in my secret quonsar's town, which looks like an amazing place!!

I'm not mentioning the town, or who my quonsar was, because it's not completely clear to me if they want to be anonymous or not. I love every single thing! I threw out the last 4 water glasses in my house that weren't from a brewery, I've tried the tea (wow! so good!) and my doggy really likes the treats. I've added the postcards to my collection (such a beautiful town) and I have the stickers on my file cabinet at work. Thank you so very much!
posted by OrangeDisk at 9:55 AM on December 8, 2015


I forgot to bring the card to pick up my parcel from the Post Office yesterday and again today. I rang my partner on the way home tonight and was fretting about it and he said don't worry you can get it tomorrow. When I pulled up to the door he opened it...and was holding my wonderful gift which he'd secretly collected this afternoon after spying the card on the mantelpiece this morning. I may have squealed! Loudly!

After tearing off the paper - sealed with adorable robin tape (julen please feel free to add robin to the animal list) - I found a box filled with gifts individually wrapped in lovely bright tissue paper, tied up with string, accompanied by cute hand-written notes like so! It was almost a shame to open them, but readers I forced myself, and just LOOK at the wonderfulness that lay within. Having obviously read an old AskMe about my disgraceful mitts my SQ kindly and wisely sent me fabulous Lemon and Fig hand cream, glass (ooh fancy!) nail files, a cute little handbag set of nail files and a very cool matt grey polish. I am so bad at doing my nails that I just cut them with clippers and gnaw off rough edges but no more! Also included were handmade milk and honey soaps, and a little tin of essential oil balm which smells DIVINE and which I have been inhaling furiously and blissfully. From the notes it looks like SQ made these themselves and I am beyond impressed and grateful. Last, but certainly not least, a large bar of Belgian chocolate filled with soft caramel. I know the only guidance I gave was that chocolate would always be appreciated, but how did you know that caramel is my absolute favourite kind of chocolate ever??! It's a Quonsmas miracle!

In short I am overwhelmed by the gorgeousness and thoughtfulness of all my gifts, but my Quonsar has remained secret apart from the letters MJ. Thank you SO MUCH for such a fabulous gift and please feel free to memail me so I can thank you in person, or out yourself in the thread so you can get the public praise which you deserve. You are the BEST! Happy Quonsmas to you and to everyone. *collapses in a happy, sweet-smelling, chocolate-smeared heap*
posted by billiebee at 10:02 AM on December 8, 2015 [4 favorites]


I just got my gift from my wonderful Quonsee TrishaLynn! Two heart-shaped coasters, two custom fridge magnets and a wonderful card. Thank you so much!
posted by grumpybear69 at 10:33 AM on December 8, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thank you, triggerfinger! I have been having a challenging few weeks and knowing that I could finally go pick up my gift today made things better, and actually opening the gift and finding all manner of Minneapolis goodies inside made things much better. I am now the proud owner of a Twin Cities cookbook, a lovely letterpress holiday card from Minneapolis, a homemade Quonsmas card from triggerfinger, a pint glass that is adorable and declares that Minnesota likes me, candy bark (I think?), and goat's milk soap that is snow scented, which I love (and which can be added to the animal count, as there is a drawing of a goat on the front). And my cats are wildly thrilled that you thought to give them boxes and wrapping paper and tissue paper and ribbons.

I have never visited Minneapolis, but knowing that Minnesota likes me makes me want to come. Though probably not so much right now. Maybe late spring, summer, that sort of thing. :)

Thank you so much!
posted by jaguar at 11:01 AM on December 8, 2015 [3 favorites]


Billiebee, yaaaay! I am so glad it arrived and you are pleased with the contents! I might have been stalking this thread to make sure it arrived safely. My other half did the wrapping (as anything I wrap ends up looking like it was savaged in a bar-fight) so I have passed your glee about the wrapping to him. And yes, the soap and oil were homemade - I really enjoyed experimenting with scents for you.

yay for secret Quonsar - I have really enjoyed the whole process this year. :D
posted by halcyonday at 11:06 AM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you invokeuse! The package arrive yesterday and the cats have not stopped playing with the cat toys since. They are lovely and the many post-its & tea will be well used. So lovely! Thanks again.
posted by machine at 11:12 AM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


Julen, there are cows and a goat -- well, pictures -- in the box I sent out.
posted by probably not that Karen Blair at 11:49 AM on December 8, 2015


I am the worst at thank you notes right now.

On Friday (3 days ago!), I got a lovely Quonsmas package in the mail from thivaia including a koi magnet, a mini-pirate, a kitty chopstick holder? that I will use as a worrystone, and a articulated paper bear that is already sitting on my Christmas tree.

Thank you! I'm sorry I'm so late with my thanks! It made my Friday night!
posted by maryr at 11:53 AM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oops, I took a photo and forgot to post it. Photo!
posted by jaguar at 11:55 AM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


I got my package from Djinn Dandy last night!! My favorite thing about Secret Quonsar is that a total stranger can pick gifts that I would never pick out for myself but that I would so thoroughly enjoy! I'll be fighting with my 7 year old daughter for the colored pencils and new Batgirl collection, and I'll be fighting with my wife for the eye-poppingly intricate geometric 3d coloring book. I already have destinations in mind for the rad James Jean postcards, and my feet are stoked about new Sasquatch (my favorite cryptid) socks!

THANK YOU SO MUCH!
posted by sleeping bear at 12:13 PM on December 8, 2015 [2 favorites]


Room 641-A, who is taking a TEMPORARY MeFi break, asked us to post her thanks (and this picture of her awesome gifts) to Deezil for a really great gift.

(We are always happy to forward thanks via email, too!)
posted by julen at 1:29 PM on December 8, 2015 [4 favorites]


EEE! So glad you like them, grumpybear69. I got your MeMail, too, which makes you very uber-kind in making doubly sure I knew you got them.

I love Quonsmas time.
posted by TrishaLynn at 1:54 PM on December 8, 2015


candy bark (I think?)

OMG peppermint bark.
posted by jaguar at 2:40 PM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


I picked up a parcel yesterday. My quonsar paid an eye-watering amount on postage to send me a gaggle of little presents, with an accompanying note explaining why they were chosen. Thank you so much! (I'm going to open them at Christmas.)
posted by robcorr at 4:05 PM on December 8, 2015 [7 favorites]


I done got quonsed! A lovely assortment of "low key life-changers" from sleeping bear. I can't tell you the number of times I've wished for a decent spudger, and I love a good carabiner, and I've always wanted to try Fluxx! A very excellent enquonsening, indeed. Thanks, sleeping bear!
posted by Rock Steady at 5:07 PM on December 8, 2015 [3 favorites]


Happy Day! I got the most wonderful package from Samthemander in the mail today! (Who remembered that I'd been their Secret Quonsor back in 2009! What a neat bit of fun that is; it's the only other year I participated.)

I got the sweetest card, which for real made me cry a little for being so awesome. Nail polish I'm totally going to put on like tonight, because it's made of stars. Some awesome temporary tattoos, which are going to help me decide on placement for my upcoming tattoo, so like what? How perfect! And a Gudetama notebook.

The timing couldn't have been more perfect, really. I had a frustrating and emotional night, and the postman came soooo early this morning. And there was a present! For me! From the internet! And it was perfect.
posted by stoneweaver at 5:15 PM on December 8, 2015 [6 favorites]


Also, i haven't got a clue how you parsed my bizarre note into such a fantastic package.
posted by stoneweaver at 5:16 PM on December 8, 2015


That is a crazy-cool coincidence, stoneweaver!
posted by headnsouth at 5:20 PM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have been thoroughly quonsed! I swear, I checked the mail this morning for my office, and it was not there, but this afternoon it was!

A fabulous quonsmas card (I love cards, this is amazing. it has a pug in a christmas tree costume. hand-drawn!), two pairs of fun socks, a cute little panda (so soft) and, best of all - two handmade pug mug warmers. Which just happen to have an amazing likeness to one of my pugs!

Thank you so much, secret metafilter friend!
posted by needlegrrl at 5:21 PM on December 8, 2015 [2 favorites]


I opened my quonsmas gift on Saturday, but due to an on-going medical emergency haven't been able to post pictures until now. Thank you, Atrahasis, for sharing your trip to Japan! Francis cat enjoyed investigating the tissue paper as it came out of the box. Nestled among the tissue paper was a pen house, complete with pen, that transforms into a handy pen tray, what I'm guessing is note paper that folds into a cat shape with tail, and a note that included a monkey stamp on the envelope and stationary. Thank you so much for helping to lift my spirits during a really stressful time.
posted by lharmon at 5:29 PM on December 8, 2015 [4 favorites]


Quonsmas came just in time! Gloves for the delayed onset of winter, ornaments (including handmade ones) for the tree, lots of chocolates, and a nice card from ThatCanadianGirl. Thanks you, they are lovely presents.
posted by Hardcore Poser at 5:56 PM on December 8, 2015 [3 favorites]


I have been quonsed. I will post more deets and pictures later. :)
posted by kalessin at 6:39 PM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


Tracking indicates my package has been delivered, so fingers crossed! I hope my Quonsee forgives me for the inelegant bubblewrap and scrap matboard. I'm feeling worse and worse about not being able to make things more decorative.
posted by PussKillian at 6:48 PM on December 8, 2015


I have been magnificently Quonsed by Hardcore Poseur!

Not only did HP capture my love of Canadian art, but I have a ray gun to annoy arcticcat with. I am the proud owner of not one, but two, flashing badges of jollity and new gloves that are frankly BOSS (my team gave me huge respect when I wore them this morning). To top it all, I have a lovely Manitoba badge to put on my rucksack.

Thank you so much, Hardcore Poseur, you have excelled at Quonsmas!
posted by arcticseal at 6:50 PM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


I got some baked goods that have been in transit for some time, so I will wait for jenquat, who has a sense of smell, to give them a smell test! And 4 other wrapped packages and a very cute card/note. Thank you to my quonsar! I am saving the opening of the wrapped things for until jenquat comes home so I may not post about them until tomorrow. But thank you so much, quonsar, for such a charming total SQ gift!
posted by kalessin at 6:53 PM on December 8, 2015


I broke down and opened my SQ gift when I got home from work this morning. After all, as ligerpants pointed out, it are my birfday.

Inside I found gel pens and highlighters in beautiful colors (I said I like office supplies), a cool University of Georgia coffee mug, a local Athens, Georgia badge and sticker (I said I like local stuff), and some delicious chocolates! Oh, and a gorgeous sketchbook, too. And a lovely holiday card.

And everything was wrapped in the prettiest color combo--pale aqua, purple, and black and silver ribbons.

Oh--the chocolates were Condor brand, with a picture of a condor on the box and on one of the chocolates, and the University of GA bulldog is on the mug, so there are a couple of animals for the list.

Thanks so much, lucy.jakobs. The pens are at work with me, and I've been enjoying them all day. I am wondering, though--what's the significance of a "seminar mug"?
posted by zorseshoes at 6:54 PM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yay! I'm glad you like it jaguar! It was fun picking stuff out and I agonized over it so I'm glad it all went over okay! You are ALWAYS welcome in Minnesota, any time of year (it's like 45 degrees right now!!) :)
posted by triggerfinger at 7:16 PM on December 8, 2015 [2 favorites]


Yay! I'm glad you like it jaguar! It was fun picking stuff out and I agonized over it so I'm glad it all went over okay! You are ALWAYS welcome in Minnesota, any time of year (it's like 45 degrees right now!!) :)

45 degrees I can handle. :) I have been drinking from the Minnesota "I like you" glass all day. And eating probably entirely too much peppermint bark, but I am home sick and so decided it was medicinal. Thank you again!
posted by jaguar at 7:22 PM on December 8, 2015 [2 favorites]


And now, *dramatic drumroll* I HAVE BEEN QUONSED. Thank you, mystery Quonse from sunny San Francisco! I love my fancy (to me) tote bag because 1) I won't have to carry my lunch and papers to work in a ratty plastic Target bag anymore , and 2) it's something I never would have bought for myself (see: the ratty plastic Target bag I use every day to carry my lunch and papers to work). I LOVE it! (It also has a flat bottom, so I can set my containers and water bottle upright which is such a small thing but so crucial)

And also, not only does chocolate always go over well with me (no-brainer) but OMG SCHARFFEN BERGER ARE YOU KIDDING ME. It is LITERALLY (and I'm not just saying this) my FAVORITE CHOCOLATE. You have made me very happy tonight, Quonse! Thank you so much!!
posted by triggerfinger at 7:28 PM on December 8, 2015 [2 favorites]


My Quons-er sent me a favorite. In the mail!

It sounds like you all got some good Quonsmas cheer, but I am here to tell you that ChuraChura is the best Quon-ser ever.

In addition to the actual, tangible favorite, she sent me some dark chocolate that I am trying very hard not to eat for dinner; a really nice card; a cat toy that is being played with as we speak (by the cat, not by me, but only because the cat is in the other room playing by herself and she won't let me have my turn); and the most awesome magnet in the world (which is never something I thought I would say about a magnet) that shows one of my very favorite birds cooing YOUR EYES LOOK TASTY. Look at all this wonderfulness! (Bonus picture of the cat and the toy she won't let me play with.)

It is perfect.

So a big thank you to ChuraChura, who is awesome. And, if you missed the disclosure elsewhere on the site, I'd like you to know that she keeps monkey poop in the freezer. You should know that. That is a thing people should know.
posted by mudpuppie at 7:31 PM on December 8, 2015 [7 favorites]


WOW. That really is an awesome magnet.
posted by triggerfinger at 7:37 PM on December 8, 2015


YOU CANNOT HAVE IT.
posted by mudpuppie at 7:44 PM on December 8, 2015 [6 favorites]


Hooray, I'm so glad everything arrived and your kitty likes the cat toy and you like the favorite and magnet and chocolate (which I purchased several days before mailing the package and did not eat).

I feel like I should clarify that the monkey poop is in a different freezer than food and stuff. A freezer just for poop, and animals awaiting dissection.
posted by ChuraChura at 7:46 PM on December 8, 2015 [7 favorites]


A freezer just for poop

🐵💩🐵💩🐵💩🐵
posted by mudpuppie at 8:02 PM on December 8, 2015 [2 favorites]


Julen, I'm remiss, I got:

Fish
Moose
Eagle
posted by arcticseal at 8:03 PM on December 8, 2015


+homicidal bird
posted by mudpuppie at 8:04 PM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


I salute the quonsar-o-verse for diversity of animals visited upon us! I'll save the current number for the next statistics posting, but hoorah!
posted by julen at 8:07 PM on December 8, 2015


I feel like I should clarify that the monkey poop is in a different freezer than food and stuff. A freezer just for poop, and animals awaiting dissection.

true facts: when I was an undergrad, we once got dinged on lab safety inspection because the grad students had filled the bottom shelf of the fridge we used for fly food with beer. I applaud your lab's superior sense of food safety!
posted by sciatrix at 8:16 PM on December 8, 2015 [4 favorites]


Yay, hardcore poser, I'm glad everything got there! I hope the gloves fit!
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 8:28 PM on December 8, 2015


Thank you for the kind note, sleeping bear. I had a lovely time attempting to pick something out for you and maybe your family, too. Your note made me tear up.
posted by djinn dandy at 9:13 PM on December 8, 2015 [1 favorite]


OMGOMGOMG... I just got quonsed. Like, really quonsed!

I came home from work to find a strange package on my doorstep, delivered to me from that mysterious, exotic country in the distant north, Canada. I've never been to Canada so it's mysterious and exotic to me and my otherwise uncanny ability to guess the content of a sealed package by feeling, weighing and gently shaking it, honed by endless training during childhood x-mases, completely failed me here.

I opened it and inside I found not just one, or two, no, a veritable cornucopia of THREE whole individually wrapped gifts! I started with the smallest of the three which turned out to be a box of delicious chocolate pearls! I didn't even know there was such a thing. But there was no time to contemplate this, I had to move on. The middle gift turned out to be a jar of Tartinade de Sucre à la Crème, basically a delicious, sinful and morally utterly wrong, so very, very wrong, blend of two of my favorite things: butter and sugar! I had to open and taste it and it is heaven. And hell. And clogged arteries. And happiness. Mrs. Lobster thinks I will not make it to X-mas with this in the house.

For the grand finale I opened the largest gift and it turned out to be a painting. A painting of a bright pink electric toothbrush. And it is the BEST GIFT!!! I LOVE IT! And Mrs. Lobster loves it, too, which makes it even better.

Thank you so very much!!! There is a real name on the box which I won't post here and I don't know what your MeFi handle is. But, whoever you may be here, kind Canadian, thank you! I loved every part of this! Thank you!
posted by Hairy Lobster at 9:13 PM on December 8, 2015 [6 favorites]


You guys, I feel like I won the Quonsmas lottery this year. Bondcliff made me this beautiful wooden box. It's perfect and smells absolutely incredible. I can't believe someone made this for me. The box lid says IN CASE OF INTERNET OUTAGE and inside are numerous high-quality photos of Internet Cats, behind this postcard.

IN ADDITION, there was
a box of locally-made chocolates. At first I thought "these are too pretty to eat." Then I ate them. Reader, they tasted as intoxicatingly delicious as they looked.

I am too overwhelmed with feelings by all of this to really write anything else. Thank You, Bondcliff. This is the the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for me. Happy Quonsmas, Metafilter.
posted by Munching Langolier at 11:00 PM on December 8, 2015 [20 favorites]


I tried to get a photo of my Internet Cat Box juxtaposed with An Actual Cat, which went exactly as one might expect.
posted by Munching Langolier at 11:14 PM on December 8, 2015 [13 favorites]


My prey processors have been so busy they've even fallen behind on my outings, which surely are a higher priority than is fetching boxes too small for me to sit in. Finally today they packed me into the car, and instead of going straight to the pier, the MeFi one vs. the one who just hears about it all the time insisted on going to the package place. Then they opened a package, right in the car! This never happens; what rare fest must this be?

A beautiful card, depicting bridges of Pittsburgh, how did Supersecret SuperQuonsar know that MeFi-human loves bridges??!, announced the delivery of a "Pittsburgh Survival Kit."

First and foremost: Myron Cope's Terrible Towel, a fun fan item with a wonderful cause.
It will be put to use immediately for a non-obvious purpose.MeFi human had been wanting to try that, but didn't have any suitable terry towels, because the other human recently Kondo'd. Although Steelers fans will sternly disapprove, MeFi human is happy for this bright Quonsmas reminder they'll see often.

On the left of the Terrible Towel, temporarily of course, are genuine, bona-fide, fully legitimate Heinz pickle and tomato ketchup pins.

Not that I notice such things: the MeFi human hasn't read books since we stopped traveling. They've been wanting to try that again, and what better way to gently start than this book.
I've only been to three of the cities mentioned; will the other chapters pleaaaassse get me back on the road?

For savoring while reading, delectable Mon Aimee Chocolat savory chocolates. Which is better, the rosemary or the fleur de sel?

Despite living my life unwaveringly by Dorian's Axiom, I was caught on camera and my profile picture has been updated.
posted by captivepredator at 11:38 PM on December 8, 2015 [3 favorites]


Oh, there is a butterfly on the beautiful scarf my anonymous Quonsar sent me. (Only mine is pristine, mwuahahhahaha)

There is an animal represented in my Quonsee's gift, which should have arrived this past Saturday, but no word yet and it's an animal already on the list. :/
posted by Mizu at 1:10 AM on December 9, 2015


speaking of animal additions - last year, my Quonsar partir du Canada, among many things, a very fat, very happy, carved-soapstone Walrus! - kbar1 and maryr have both mentioned worry-stones, well this has sort of been mine over the past year.
posted by dorian at 2:11 AM on December 9, 2015


Kalessin, feel free to discard the baked goods - I will send you fresh when the post office has gotten itself together better! (And when I don't have other heavy items in the box to jack the shipping up!) Sorry they took so long to get to you!
posted by firei at 4:21 AM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you to Curious Nu for making my day with honey, stationary, coloring books and a kind note. Your taste in items was perfect. I love Quonsmas.
posted by jadepearl at 5:43 AM on December 9, 2015


I'm glad you enjoyed your gifts, Munching Langolier . When someone specifically lists "internet cats" in their wishlist not once, but twice, it becomes a bit of a challenge to figure out a humane way to fulfill that request.

Those chocolates are my standard "here, have a gift from my town" gift but I've never actually eaten any myself.
posted by bondcliff at 5:55 AM on December 9, 2015 [5 favorites]


I'm mailing my Secret Quonsar package today, finally! :)

And I got it yesterday! An awesome fleece blanket, some delicious local blueberry preserves, a new travel mug (which I can use), and some decadent belgian chocolate candy. I just kept pulling more and more stuff from the box!

Annabelle74, you complete me. Thank you so much for the awesome gifts. Happy Quonsmas!
posted by schleppo at 6:01 AM on December 9, 2015 [3 favorites]


The exposed brick chimney in my loo is the perfect place for a toothbrush painting with Canadian provenance. If your quonser makes his/her presence known to you, Hairy Lobster, please ask where/how a yank might get her hands on one!
posted by headnsouth at 6:30 AM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


julie_of_the_jungle, you have made me so happy! Fun wrapping, a thoughtful note, and a cookbook with a personal connection to you...I love it. I hope my almost-three-year-old likes the zucchini apple pie as much as your little one does! Thanks, and happy holidays!
posted by slmorri at 6:55 AM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


Many thanks to silverstatue for great random goodies! Love the Presidents set of playing cards, Plato and a Platypus philosophy/humor book, and yummy caramels! One very happy quonsee here!
posted by young_simba at 10:11 AM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


Ok, cellar door, after a bit of drama with second eight-legged companion (mother brought left-behind octopus, octopus got lost in brother's house, octopus was found, octopus briefly got lost again in my apartment, octopus was found again, octopus is now in my office, whew), a second package should be winging its way toward you either today or tomorrow, depending on work and other stuff. Keep an eye out!
posted by holborne at 10:12 AM on December 9, 2015


Thank you to stellathon for the box of beers! I have exercised an unprecedented level of self-control and saved all but one for Christmas.
posted by inire at 10:24 AM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


Eee, can't wait! First-octopus has found a place on my desk next to a hand-carved cedar owl, and is staring at me intently with his beady little eyes as I type this. He, too, is rife with excitement.

(In any case, such trickery is to be expected with an octopus. It is known.)
posted by cellar door at 10:39 AM on December 9, 2015


Oh man, Miko took my request to heart for lots of little things and sent me a rockin selection of gifts! I laughed out loud at the Market Basket bag and am especially excited about using the spices and the camp tray! And I heart the scent of the little Christmas hearth candle. I spread everything out on my dining table so I could appreciate the bounty. Thank you so much! (Also I don't know who Dominic is but I would like to think he was also wishing me Happy Quonsmas through his drawing in the notebook, hahahaha)
posted by brilliantine at 10:40 AM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


A big thank you to Homelystar for the box of goodies which just arrived. I'm wearing the earrings right now!
posted by jeri at 12:07 PM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you whitewall for the extremely awesome Star Trek pizza cutter! It is now perched proudly atop my knife block. We eat a lot of homemade pizza here, and no lie, I lost my pizza cutter around a year ago and I've been muddling through with knives inadequate to the task. Also the chocolate squares have already been consumed and were of course delicious. Thank you so much!
posted by Daily Alice at 1:37 PM on December 9, 2015


jeoc's timing worked out wonderfully in the end, since I've been having a godawful low-level family emergency in the background, and I came home to her delightful package full of tea, candies, a notebook, and tissues. It's like a survival kit for the next few days!!
posted by mostly vowels at 2:47 PM on December 9, 2015


Hooray! Glad you liked everything, young_simba! The presidents cards cracked me up :)
posted by silverstatue at 3:31 PM on December 9, 2015


Add me to the list of late posters; my Quonsee should get their parcel today, hopefully.

*watches page, frets a little*
posted by matrixgeek at 4:27 PM on December 9, 2015


My dearest sarcasticah,

I am amazed at the hand-knit babushka scarf, not only knit of the softest wool, on the finest gage, but also by the beautiful orange-pink color. It is just perfect! I don't know if I mentioned, somewhere, that I have let my hair go gray, but my wardrobe hasn't caught up with the color change. This scarf could not be a better shade. I also love the space-dyed wool. Did I mention that my ears often get cold? This scarf is perfect to wrap them, and me up. I also received a delightfully decorated christmas card, now on my sideboard, and my favorite cookies, Speculoos! I have a wealth of allergies - my sweet quansar found a way to still send me a treat. So tickled! Picture to be posted later. Scarf now firmly around my neck.
posted by djinn dandy at 4:40 PM on December 9, 2015 [3 favorites]


julen, thanks for passing along that 641-A got the gift. YAY QUONSMAS!
posted by deezil at 4:45 PM on December 9, 2015


YAAAY, I'm so glad you like it, djinn dandy!! (I hope cat hair doesn't bother you because the cats insisted on inspecting the scarf before I mailed it...)
posted by sarcasticah at 5:29 PM on December 9, 2015


sarcasticah, I adore it. I am delighted.
posted by djinn dandy at 5:47 PM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


A big thank you to my Quonsar in Newfoundland! I received my gift today, and it is so lovely. The felted pincushion is such a beauty, and I can tell that the local chocolate bar is going to be amazing. Yay!
posted by to recite so charmingly at 6:04 PM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you, Secret Quosnar, from Seattle, Washington! She got me a bunch of gifts for my furry friends (cat and dog), plus a lovely candle for my human self. I looooooove the gifts, and I was so excited! Plus we apparently share the same love for rain scented things. And my cat is playing with one of his toys as I write this. Thank you, thank you again!!!!!! :)

Also the card was adorable!
posted by kbennett289 at 6:12 PM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


I've been quonsed! I've been quonsed! The loveliest thereemix sent me a marvelous package of two delightful new teas (non-floral and non-bergamot, as I requested!) and a tea ball and a book that was specially chosen for a librarian who loves folklore, and I am just totally thrilled by her thoughtfulness. The author is new to me and I am so excited to start reading! Everything was beautifully wrapped and it came on a day when I got bad news about a family member's health, and thank you, thereemix, so much, for being delightful, and thank you, dear quonselves, for facilitating the magic.

Please note the addition of an owl for the animal count, plus also DOGGIE WRAPPING PAPER omg.
posted by athenasbanquet at 7:24 PM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


YAY QUONSMAS!

I came home after a suckass long day at work to a package with some super nice green teas and rooibos teas and a tea diffuser that sort of French Press thing that sits on top of your tea mug and a cool book on tea.

THANK YOU SUPER SECRET QUONSAR. You are the best quonsar of them all! :)
posted by ian1977 at 7:32 PM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


We hit a big milestone today, so here are some

Mid-week Midnight (Hamster Time) Statistics:

437 participants

231 presents have already arrived (52.9%!)
  09   presents have been marked as delayed (although a subset are probably already en route) (2.1%)
  59   are known to be in transit (13.5%)
  11   might have arrived; we’re awaiting confirmation (2.5%)
127 gifts are a mystery to us. We have no status from quonsar or quonsee (29.06%)

  02   times two quonsczars answered the same email at the same time
  02   of 3 quonsczars who have gotten their gift (also who have confirmation their gift arrived)

  21   number of countries packages will be sent from, delivered to, or end up in
  03   people who are receiving their gifts in a different country than they sent their gifts from!
  06   people have gotten their gift but are saving it to open later! (not all the same people as last update!)
  63   different animals represented in gifts (that we know about) so far
  41   gifts (that we know about) have included books so far.
            If we included notebooks, that number would probably increase by 50%.
  01   mail strikes have occurred this year.
posted by julen at 8:59 PM on December 9, 2015 [4 favorites]


Okay now that I have gotten confirmation that my Quonsee got their gift I can share with you all the utter silliness that is the bonus gift I made: the Kitty Cat Coffee Cup Cozy, for which I walked into a Starbucks and asked for an empty cup and endured Barista Eyebrow.

Eventually when I get my act together I'll write up the "pattern" for it and the refined crocheted octopus and post links on Projects so that you all may inflict overwrought cup cozies on unsuspecting loved ones!

Protip: when at a holiday party in which you really want to make sure your cup stays your own, use a coffee cup cozy to ID it instead of a sharpie. Like the low-rent version of a wine glass charm!
posted by Mizu at 9:14 PM on December 9, 2015 [12 favorites]


I had a terrible day. Worked like a demon until 9pm. Finally got everything done and headed home, only to hit an invisible-in-the-dark (but new and rather deep) pothole as I turned onto my street. Ripped a huge hole in my tire, and it's not even five months since I bought brand new tires... A bunch of curses and whining and a spare tire later, I was still incredibly annoyed as I walked into my building at like 10pm. BUT THEN! Secret Quonsar Package!! Yay!

Thanks so much to ReluctantViking for an immediate de-grumpifier! Such cool maps of New England - might come in handy, as I've been threatening my friends in the NE with a visit and hiking would definitely be on the agenda. A great smelling soap! A fun magazine! The Lobster Coast by Colin Woodard, which looks like a fun read. Awesome looking bingo boards that I'm sure I can find a space for in my collection of old stuff. And a wooden paddle with the number 46!! I'm guessing it's a bid paddle for auctions? I may have to bring that home to Sweden to use! Swedish summer auctions are the best, and my aunties will be so jealous of my personal bid paddle. :)

To cap it off, there was a nice note and a family photo, and it just made me smile. Thanks again for the lovely package that was a huuuge pick-me-up. Merry merry, indeed!!
posted by gemmy at 10:10 PM on December 9, 2015 [3 favorites]


Glad you liked it, jadepearl! It was fun to try and put together.
posted by curious nu at 10:22 PM on December 9, 2015


ActionPopulated: "I got my Quonsed so well by kostia today!

... this Eddie From Ohio CD, fulfilling my request for local music. You had no way of knowing this kostia, but I have fond memories of my older cousin introducing me to Eddie From Ohio, and this is one (technically two) CD of theirs I don't have! ... My cat even got a nice box to head butt out of the deal!

Thank you kostia, truly you are a master of quonsing.
"

You are so very welcome! I'm delighted you were already aware of EFO and hope very much that you enjoy the music. I'm flattered and relieved you liked the scarf and the other stuff. I felt very sophisticated wrapping gifts in a scarf. And thanks for the cat picture!
posted by kostia at 10:41 PM on December 9, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you songdog!

I received your package of Western Mass delights all safe and sound here in Asia's World City (tm) and am eating both the jerkies (buffalo and beef for the animal counters!) as I type this. The tropical sea life stickers (shark, manta, octopus, flounder, sunfish, angelfish, starfish and crab!) will delight my students and the Trader Joe's dark chocolate will delight me after a long day in class! To top it all off, a swish Amherst pencil and a rocking Emily Dickinson (!) daguerrotype (!!) postcard (!!!!!!!) and some bookdarts to jazz up my desk! I am so spoiled!

But that's not all. Oh no. For you sent me the most incredible edible gift ever: CANDY CANE JOE-JOES! I will update the thread with the details of exactly how each of my Not-American colleagues reacted when I bring them in tomorrow. (I expect rending of garments and delighted yet plaintive wailing.)

Thank you again and happy Quonsmas to all!
posted by mdonley at 2:10 AM on December 10, 2015


Dear slmorri

Thank you for the lovely things you thoughtfully packed for me in a lovely christmas box, all the way from Chicago. And for taking the trouble to discover I used to live there! I will be using the calender everyday next year!
posted by infini at 2:54 AM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]


03 people who are receiving their gifts in a different country than they sent their gifts from!

I'm one of those!
posted by infini at 2:58 AM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]


Glad you liked it, Gemmy. If you look on each map I made notes of my very favorite places from my constant exploring of New England. But you must never ever reveal our favorite camping place! We have to go in a lottery every year to get a spot as it is. Shhhh...
posted by ReluctantViking at 5:52 AM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]


I've been Quonsed! My generous Anonymous Quonser gifted me with the fanciest pen I've ever owned! It's a fountain pen, and it came with a bottle of ink to refill it! Misterussell, a pen guy, is super envious and tried to jokingly pocket it, so I know it's a great pen! I'm looking forward to bringing a little class to my planner!

I also asked for a good shade of lipstick, and Anonymous stepped up too. On the recommendation of Anonymous's wife, Quonser added on a Neutrogeena lip balm in Sunny Berry and it is the softest colored lip balm I've ever tried. Anonymous, I was complimented TWICE at work today on my lip shade. Well done! Anonymous is also sending me some local sweets, which I'm sure I'll devour hungrily.

THANK YOU ANONYMOUS QUONSER! Also, Amazon does a bang-up gift wrap job!

This last quarter of 2015 has been kind of crummy at Chez Russell, capped off with the unexpected loss of my aunt last week. Her services are Saturday. This entire thread has been my oasis of happy. Much love and joy to you all.
posted by kimberussell at 5:59 AM on December 10, 2015 [8 favorites]


Aahhhh my secret quonsee is set to receive their gift today! So excited I hope they like it. :D
posted by thereemix at 6:39 AM on December 10, 2015


Thank you, apoch, for my most awesome letters, which I now refer to as "the Bookends of Awesome," and the cards. Things came in THREE different packages and days, which made everything ever so exciting!
posted by Ink-stained wretch at 7:28 AM on December 10, 2015


I wore my Quonsmas scarf for the first time today, super pleased at how well it matches things I already have! Thanks again Kostia!
posted by ActionPopulated at 8:24 AM on December 10, 2015 [3 favorites]


Thank you okayokayigive! The Unofficial Guide arrived yesterday and I am already stuck into it doing last minute research and planning for our trip. Excellent history snooping on your part! I'm going to have a lot of fun digging through the many chapters. Happy Quonsmas everyone!
posted by Cuke at 8:44 AM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]


I don't know who my Maine-based quonsar is, but he or she is AWESOME! We had this fun thing happen where I said I wanted whatever was cool and unique to the quonsar's native area, and of course we live within four hours of each other. And my sekrit q. still totally delivered. Thank you so much! I have multiple favorite items but the pirate skeleton finger puppets are currently at the top of the list, or possibly the vintage postcard.

I had a crummy day and this sweet package and card really turned things around for me. I hope you see this! Thank you!
posted by theredpen at 9:29 AM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]


This is my first year participating and I'm so delighted by the whole thing. It's bringing me back to the childhood excitement and anticipation I felt at this time of year. Now that I'm older and at least a bit wiser I realize that the best part wasn't about the stuff but was the feelings. Fun, joyous simple feelings.
I can't wait for my Quonsee to get their package. I keep checking this thread even though I know it's not expected to arrive until tomorrow at the earliest. Maybe it's early? *bounce bounce*

And then there is the waiting for mine. I read the thread about packages being sent or arriving and think "Ooo maybe they're talking about me?" Yesterday on my way home I couldn't help wondering if my package arrived and was a weeny bit disappointed when there was nothing on the table when I walked in. Not bad disappointed, just giggling fun disappointed. Okay maybe it will be tomorrow!

And yes I probably will do the same thing on the way home tonight. And no matter what I will read this thread again and feel happy about everyone else being happy and excited.

It's overall just so much fun and feel goody which is so awesome.

Thank you everyone!
posted by Jalliah at 10:54 AM on December 10, 2015 [7 favorites]


theredpen, I am pleased the pair of skeleton pirates have found a good home. Merry Quonsmas! Glad to help un-crum your day, almost neighbor.
posted by enfa at 10:56 AM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oh! Now I've been quonsed! (Turns out what I'd thought was my secret quonsar gift was not after all.) Thank you so very much, Stynxno, for the towel and garlic-infused sea salt—they will be put to good use in my kitchen!

Happy quonsmas, all!
Is it possible that I bought myself a subscription to Food & Wine? Weird. In my sleep??
posted by heyho at 11:11 AM on December 10, 2015 [2 favorites]


thereemix, I did! I liked it so much! Apparently our time streams have gotten crossed because I received it YESTERDAY but today I am STILL full of delight so you know you did a good job! A+ quonsing!
posted by athenasbanquet at 11:25 AM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you, Anonymous Quonsar! I'm sorry to say I've already eaten some of the chocolate and I LOVE the wooden pen and the fancy life-planning stationery! And the incredibly beautiful glittery box in which the things came; I don't know what I own that's pretty enough to be kept in there. YAY. Thank you!
posted by Aravis76 at 12:57 PM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]


Whoa, I totally missed that yesterday athenasbanquet (too many threads in my recent activity!) but I'm glad it got there early and I'm glad you like it! And I'm glad you liked the Owl and the wrapping paper (and I'm glad nothing got squished in transit). :D
posted by thereemix at 1:04 PM on December 10, 2015


Let me know what you think of the book!
posted by thereemix at 1:05 PM on December 10, 2015


Aravis76, I don't know if you could read the note card, but my father is a wood artist. He turns those pens to give to well behaved children who enter his shop. The insert is just a ballpoint and is easy to replace. The coconut patties are a mainstay in Florida tourist shops. I glad you enjoyed! Happy Quonsmas!
posted by PorcineWithMe at 1:16 PM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]


Hi Brilliantine! I'm so, so glad you liked your assortment of things. Thanks for the great direction. Everything was purchased or made locally - enjoy drinking cocoa and burning your candle and everything!
posted by Miko at 2:02 PM on December 10, 2015


Could it be? Could it really be?

I was away for a couple of days and got in late last night and staggered to bed without even sorting the pile of mail. And this morning I noticed on my way out the door that the mail included a mysterious package from Florida. Hmmm. Late for work, late for work, gotta run, but ... hmmm.

And of course, finally it hits me. Have I been Quonsed? Is it beginning to look a lot like Quonsmas? Well, well, well.
posted by RedOrGreen at 2:27 PM on December 10, 2015


I WAS DELAYED BY HOUSEGUESTS. For statistical purposes I received mine last Wednesday or so.

The excellent Quonsar named maurice has quonsed me a book of BBQ recipes that is extremely awesome if only for the sole fact that it is not exclusively oriented around grills and so is very apartment-friendly! It is also inscribed by various employees of the place! Also, a Solstice card! Oven BBQ, I can't wait! It's an all-exclamation-point Quonsmas in the rhizome household this year.

This was my first, and I didn't know how anonymous I was supposed to be. I'm glad there are varying levels. I also used the long questionnaire thing that was in the other thread. Now I can start shopping for next year!
posted by rhizome at 2:31 PM on December 10, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yaaaay bookmammal, I'm so happy you loved everything! I just saw your comment after a hectic few days -- sorry for the late response -- but I am pleased as punch that you were pleased! :)
posted by hansbrough at 2:49 PM on December 10, 2015


I've received my very first Quonsmas priority mail envelope from NYC! I couldn't wait for Quonsmas -- of course I had to open it right away!!!

My Secret Quonsar chose to be anonymous, so I don't know her/his username, but whoever you are, you chose a most amazingly perfect book of poetry: Life on Mars, by Tracy K. Smith. If you'd been here to see me, you'd have noticed my eyes getting just a little misty when I read The New Yorker blurb on the back of the book. It called the poems Smith's "wild, far-ranging elegy" for her father, an engineer who worked on the Hubble Space Telescope. My late father worked for NASA back in the day, and one of his projects dealt with the feasibility of human travel through the Van Allen belt on the way to Mars. You couldn't have possibly known that... unless you did a bit of time traveling. ;)

And the pencils are just lovely. Thank you.
posted by LeftMyHeartInSanFrancisco at 3:20 PM on December 10, 2015 [8 favorites]


If the USPS was right in its estimate, my Secret Quonsar should receive the package today. I regarding regret not having the foresight to request tracking. Fingers and toes are crossed for a safe and prompt delivery.
posted by LeftMyHeartInSanFrancisco at 3:28 PM on December 10, 2015


My package left me on Monday and had an estimated shipment date of Thursday, December 10th--today. It got from New York to Jersey City very early on Tuesday morning, and there's no tracking activity since. I sincerely hope this is one of those USPS updating the last three status changes all at once things, and not an indication that my package now lives in New Jersey, because my quonsee does not live in New Jersey!

(I'm a bit anxious about this at the moment.)
posted by zorseshoes at 4:04 PM on December 10, 2015


If you look on each map I made notes of my very favorite places from my constant exploring of New England

Of course the one map I opened last night was the one without any markings! The others are full of awesome tips. What a great idea! Thank you again!
posted by gemmy at 6:00 PM on December 10, 2015


Dear SQ, whoever you are,
I came home to find a missed delivery note on my door and I can't collect my parcel for another 14 whole hours. I feel like an impatient child waiting for Santa to hurry up and get here already, but that's part of the charm, feeling like a six year old again!
posted by peppermind at 6:12 PM on December 10, 2015 [3 favorites]


My quonsar is the best quonsar! Amandi sent me a beautiful burgundy hand-knitted scarf. It is just my colour, how did you know? This photo really doesn't do it justice, it has so many shades of deep reds and pinks in it. Plus a book on Jane Addams - I only heard about her for the first time earlier this year when I visited Chicago, and have been meaning to find out more about her ever since - I love bad-ass women like her. Plus a pretty card with butterflies, and wrapping paper with lions and monkeys and crocodiles and turtles and elephants and giraffes and ducks, which must surely add some new animals to the list. Thank you amandi, you are wonderful!
posted by une_heure_pleine at 8:01 PM on December 10, 2015 [2 favorites]


Gosh, I've been thoroughly quonsed! I asked and ye, did I receive! FURY ROAD DVD, Y'ALL. FURY. ROAD. DVD!!! I saw it four times in cinema and now I can watch it whenever I want! I am so pleased. I am the most pleased that did ever please! But that wasn't all! There was also a little bottle of a perfume that is a gorgeous duplicate of a perfume I adore but is kind of a spendy limited edition so I've been reluctant to get more even though my bottle is dwindling. This dupe is a nearly-perfect match! Score! I shall go to Valhalla smelling fantastic!

Thank you so much, Quonsar! You made my day!
posted by E. Whitehall at 12:23 AM on December 11, 2015 [6 favorites]


E. Whitehall, you're very welcome! And I'm so so relived about the perfume, I ran the poor shop assistant ragged until I settled on that one. Your hints were AMAZING, by the way! And I also loved Fury Road, so that was an absolute no brainer.
So shiny! SO CHROME!
posted by matrixgeek at 12:32 AM on December 11, 2015 [1 favorite]


PorcineWithMe, I didn't find a card so I didn't realise that the pen was made by your father - how lovely. I'll treasure it and make sure I use it to mark only the essays of the most well-behaved students.
posted by Aravis76 at 12:52 AM on December 11, 2015 [3 favorites]


I have been secretly quonsed. I had been concerned that my hints might have been too vague, but in the end I received something great that I will hold in my hands everyday at work. And, I learned something from it, too. I had no idea that Cambridge still has a women-only college. (Also, something from Cambridge will look just right on my desk and give me a boost at work where I am on the losing side of the UKian to USian balance generally.) Thank you, Secret Quonsar!
posted by Gotanda at 2:31 AM on December 11, 2015 [1 favorite]


I love coming back to this thread over and over, both for the gratitude and joy of the recipients, and for the relief/ delight of the givers.

Your notes are leaven in a sometimes-flat, shitty time. Keep bringing the bubbles, my friends, and a happy Quonsmas to all!!
posted by wenestvedt at 3:18 AM on December 11, 2015 [6 favorites]


Plus also, a million more thanks to the Quonsmas Elves for rigging this all up again. So much happiness, thanks to your work.

I would love to hear from you on the next podcast!!
posted by wenestvedt at 3:20 AM on December 11, 2015 [5 favorites]


I'm starting to get nervous.... has someone at the post office gotten jealous that THEY didn't get a Quonsmas gift, and in revenge sent my quonsee's traveling on the scenic route?!?
posted by easily confused at 3:58 AM on December 11, 2015


Same here... I sent it out on November 25th, I'd think that it would have reached the US by now. Is it taking the slow boat?
posted by Too-Ticky at 4:31 AM on December 11, 2015


une_heure_pleine, I'm so glad you liked it! yay!!!
posted by amandi at 6:26 AM on December 11, 2015 [1 favorite]


Is it taking the slow boat?

Starting to wonder if mine has taken the slow boat too. Why didn't I track it?!
posted by headnsouth at 7:26 AM on December 11, 2015


Finally got a day off yesterday and took a chance to open my Quonsmas gift from joedan and stoneweaver! It made my heart SO glad. Somehow they intuited that my favorite food in the world is enchiladas, and sent me, from New Mexico, green chile and enchilada sauce spice mixes and an adorable, informative, delicious-looking cookbook of New Mexico favorites! Thank you both so much! NM is one of my favorite places on earth - I've enjoyed some magical moments in the Land of Enchantment, and this was a wonderful reminder of those. Can't wait to cook these up in the drear of a New England winter and bring some high desert beauty into my life! Thank you for such a thoughtful gift!
posted by Miko at 7:26 AM on December 11, 2015 [1 favorite]


Exams are dumb but presents in the mail are awesome. My directions were vague and unhelpful but my gift is perfect! A little elephant to go with my elephant and hippo collection, and an ice ball maker. My drinks are about to get much fancier looking. Thank you so much, Quonsar!
I just ordered my Quonsee's gifts yesterday but hopefully the fast shipping gets the first part there within the week.
posted by sgrass at 8:27 AM on December 11, 2015


USP tracking assures me my package is out for delivery....out for delivery! It's going to a PO box, but still. It's almost there/here, Quonsee!
posted by but no cigar at 9:49 AM on December 11, 2015 [1 favorite]


O Quonsmas box, o Quonsmas box,
Your sender really really rox.

My Quonsar was the estimable sockermom, which made me very happy :) She sent the most adorable card with penguins and a cardinal on it (I have a little cardinal thingy going on at the holidays, which she didn't know about), a little blue handknit elfy hat for Tiny St. Nubbins, a blank book with a cool design on it, some heart-shaped gold paperclips (did you know that the French word for paperclips is "trombones???"), a variety pack of mini Ghirardelli chocolates and some soap handmade by her very own self which -- per my note -- was mildly but delightfully scented.

I love Secret Quonsar when I get to connect with new people, but how wonderful it is to receive something from someone whose posts I see and admire.

Thanks to sockermom, and thanks always to the Quonsmas elves! Love to everyone.
posted by St. Hubbins at 1:29 PM on December 11, 2015 [4 favorites]


kimberussell, glad you enjoyed it. ms. chazlarson was tickled that she'd brought joy. I read her your Quonsmas guidance and she immediately pulled the Neutrogena out of her purse. "This is the one.".
posted by chazlarson at 4:03 PM on December 11, 2015


For my part, thank you, Anonymous [I apparently managed to mislay the piece of paper that had my Quonsar's MeFi name on it] for the super-cool set of comics [including a thick bio of Pablo Picasso], spicy Jalapeño chips, and toothbrush-shaped dog chews.

Gracie has enjoyed one, and the chips are delicious!

Happy Quonsmas to All!
posted by chazlarson at 4:14 PM on December 11, 2015 [1 favorite]


OMG, I've been Quonsed! Thanks to the wonderful banknote of the year for the book currently atop my "to read" list, and the delicious fudge! From the other end of the country, cheers!
posted by peppermind at 4:14 PM on December 11, 2015 [1 favorite]


My quonsar is way awesome!

Pretty shortly after matching I got a message that they were on the fence about what to send -- either something safe and obvious or something that would be time consuming but (hopefully) fun for me to do. Obviously I have to go with the latter because 1. I am a firm believer of inviting serendipity into my life 2. I was super curious about what this option was.

I feel super bad because my quonsar was super good about sending out my gift early (it was purchased online on 11/12 and sent first class in an envelope), but I was on tour with FARM from September - November 23rd, so when I got home I had a big pile of envelopes which I promptly put into a drawer to procrastinate sorting. It didn't even occur to me to look through them until now, a few days after my quonsar asked if I'd received it.

Anyway, for Quonsmas I ended up getting like, a Call to Adventure. aniola sent me this 400-mile bicycle route map that runs from Mobile, AL to Fulton, MS. This is something I probably would have never ever considered trying, left to my own devices, but eyeballing the map that arrived (which includes various cool historic locations along the route!) has me super excited to look toward tackling this at some point (I'm reasonably fit from swimming, but don't have any cycling-specific conditioning or much cycling experience, so I'll need to gather some first). But I'd never really thought to do any sort of travel by bicycle, and getting this has me thinking about it in a serious way where I might otherwise never have. Way waaaay cool.

Thanks so much, aniola! You're the best! :D
posted by Gymnopedist at 4:21 PM on December 11, 2015 [6 favorites]


I have been Quonsed with the most adorable little knitted squid.

Everything is all squee here. Thank you Secret Quonsar!
posted by susiswimmer at 5:47 PM on December 11, 2015 [3 favorites]


Yay, Miko! I'm so glad it got there and is something you like! I waffled about whether to go full hot, so I'm glad you have experience with New Mexican food. It was a lot of fun shopping for you :-)
posted by stoneweaver at 7:05 PM on December 11, 2015 [2 favorites]


octopiii
posted by infini at 8:20 PM on December 11, 2015 [1 favorite]


Gymnopedist: My quonsar is way awesome!

Speaking of which - let me tell you how awesome my quonsar is!

So there was this mysterious package in the mail, and after staring at it and poking and prodding it for a bit, I finally opened it up - and what hopped out? An adorable tiny origami frog! And a gift wrapped package which sat on my desk for a full day before I couldn't wait any longer: and drumroll ...

I have been Quonsed in the most wonderful way by Gymnopedist!

I've had Gene Wolfe's Shadow and Claw / Sword and Citadel sitting on my To Read list for a while now, and Gymnopedist has gone and dug up Gene Wolfe's first novel, finally back in print - I have a lovely copy of The Fifth Head of Cerberus. "The best novella of the 1970s." "A universally acknowledged masterpiece of science fiction by one of the field's most brilliant writers." How has this book not been on my radar? How? This is ... just perfect. I will look forward to devouring the book over the holidays. Thank you, thank you, Gymnopedist, and a very Merry Quonsmas to one and all!

PS Oh, and dark chocolate. My favorite Endangered Species kind, with blueberries. Because, the note says, "Hey, why not?" Yeah, no biggie - just nailed it. I can't believe this was your first SQ!

PPS It's remarkable - I was raving in a random thread earlier this year about how absolutely awesome my last SQ gift from Kostia was. That book has really stayed with me. And now this? I fully expect to be raving about it in the years to come. It's like magic.

Quonsmas is really the best thing ever.
posted by RedOrGreen at 8:51 PM on December 11, 2015 [4 favorites]


Hey, British Secret Quonsar, your package has arrived from the Kingdom and, yes, the envelope inside with the awesome multi-tool made it through customs with nary a scratch. The game you included looks awesome and I look forward to playing it at the next board game meetup I attend. Chocolates? Yes, please, many love for chocolates from anywhere but the U.S. (we don't really have chocolate, it's more brown-colored food-grade wax).

Your card was lovely and the tag and bow equally so. Congrats on your first Quonsar, you did well! Thank you!
posted by fireoyster at 9:18 PM on December 11, 2015 [1 favorite]


RedOrGreen: I'm so glad that you like your Quonsmas package! Merry Quonsmas! :)
posted by Gymnopedist at 9:47 PM on December 11, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thanks to asok for the lovely Xmas tree decoration which arrived earlier this week. My SO loves to get 1 or 2 nice decorations for the tree each year so this is especially welcome and much approved by both of us. Since I am sure my SO thinks it is a bit weird for me to send presents overseas to complete strangers a quonsmas gift that meets her approval adds considerably to its usefulness. My gift should be well on its way to the continent, I should say I am not a natural present wrapper and the packaging may well be ein Frühstück des Hundes as they probably do not say in German speaking lands. I did however take on last year's lesson of not sending it in a recycled cat food box.
posted by biffa at 4:01 AM on December 12, 2015


chazlarson, it was me, and I'm so glad you like it! If you ever make it to Baltimore, head on over to Atomic Books, a fun little bookstore (and home to the John Waters fan club), where the indie comics came from. Merry Quonsmas!
posted by ImproviseOrDie at 5:21 AM on December 12, 2015


My secret quonsar gift has arrived!

My family traditionally opens one gift on Christmas Eve. Since I am the chief present wrangler in the house, there isn't always a present under there on Christmas Eve for me (that sounds way more horrible than it is. There's plenty Christmas morning!) This year I decided to save my secret quonsar gift to open as my Christmas Eve gift. My husband put the box under the tree - after confirming what it was - so I wouldn't be tempted to just rip open the box. He wouldn't even read the card to tell me my secret quonsar's identity, so THANK YOU whoever you are!

I will wait till Christmas Eve, I will wait till Christmas Eve, I will wait till Christmas Eve
posted by lyssabee at 7:35 AM on December 12, 2015 [1 favorite]


Ooh! It's here! A most festive and mysterious box was just delivered to the Too-Ticky residence, and I made a mug of my Best Tea, and sat down to fully enjoy the unboxing.

Reader, I'm delighted. My fully anonymous quonsar has sent me:
- a Bengal tiger that I can build from tiny Lego-like building blocks. Fun! I like building stuff.
- a zebra, same same. More fun! More building!
- Maple candies! This is going to be good, I can feel it in my bones.
- Handmade goat's milk and anise soap! It smells delicious and shall be put to good use come tomorrow morning.

Each and every one of these lovely gifts was wrapped in nice paper and prettied up with ribbon. It all brightened up a grey and dreary day that was otherwise plagued by rain and kernel panics.

Dear Secret Quonsar, you did amazingly well. Thank you so much. I feel thoroughly quonsed (and slightly guilty because my own gifts were wrapped in kraft). A very merry Quonsmas to you!
posted by Too-Ticky at 7:54 AM on December 12, 2015 [1 favorite]


You're welcome, Peppermind! After several days of having only vague gift ideas, everything fell into place over the course of about three hours, and I went from mostly clueless about what to get you to finding the perfect things. Cheers to you, too!
posted by Banknote of the year at 8:07 AM on December 12, 2015 [1 favorite]


Just shipped mine today. I have no excuse except over thinking the plate of gift beans. It is quirky and has a side of cult pens included in the box.
posted by jadepearl at 10:19 AM on December 12, 2015


The SQ gifts that I received the last two years filled me with such joy, as both my Quonsars picked up on my love of Sophisticated Tuxedo Cats by looking through my profile. Quonsmas is a happy part of a usually difficult season. The last month has seen a broken foot, challenging talks about the future, two weeks stuck in the apartment by myself, an incredibly disruptive bedbug infestation that led to the disposal of most of our things, and more sad talks. I totally blew the Quonsmas send-by deadline as I couldn't get around, and shit was fucked up and bullshit, and I felt terrible for having to email the team to withdraw and send a second-rounder in my place.

Last night, my beloved Wilshire Boulevard died after suddenly falling extremely ill after a lifetime of never getting sick. I came home from saying our goodbyes to a box of local New Orleans snacks. I don't know your MeFi name, but please know that your present made all the difference yesterday: it made me laugh while ugly-crying, provided important sustenance alongside all the wine I drank, and I found a cheese snack in the bed this morning.
posted by avocet at 10:41 AM on December 12, 2015 [24 favorites]


Aw, I'm sorry avocet, and shout outs to your SQ for bringing some cheer to you at a dark time. I love all the joy and glee in these threads, but an Internet stranger sending someone a little bit of unexpected love on a sad day actually feels like the epitome of Quonsmas. *hugs*
posted by billiebee at 10:55 AM on December 12, 2015 [7 favorites]


Thanks so much for the lovely tea and the hiking book, SQ!The weather in Virginia right now has me itching to plan long hikes with my daughter. If you'd please identify yourself I'd love to send you a thank you!
posted by Pardon Our Dust at 1:10 PM on December 12, 2015


Update from Hamster Central, uh, I mean the quonset hut that doubles as sq headquarters.

This weekend, we will begin sending out the annual "Did you get it?" emails to folks we have marked "Maybe", and the annual "So... what's up?" emails to folks for whom we have no status at all. We do these all by hand (especially the "So... what's up?" emails because we check to see if we're asking for quonsee status, quonsar status, or both before crafting the email) , so those emails will come in waves throughout the upcoming week. Please make sure we don't end up in your junk or spam folders!

The hamsters volunteered to knock on people's doors and "acquire the information" ... until they saw the sheer number of cats in people's gift pictures and opted for egg nog and 24/7 viewing of the Hallmark Channel instead.
posted by julen at 1:41 PM on December 12, 2015 [3 favorites]


Julen and hamsters: the SQ package I sent out has finally, FINALLY been delivered!
posted by zorseshoes at 2:43 PM on December 12, 2015


I finally got to the weirdly far away post office to pick up my package, and discovered box of amazing looking teas and two chocolate bars that are my favourite flavours. Many thanks!
posted by platypus of the universe at 2:46 PM on December 12, 2015


Sign me up to be a second-chance-Quonsar-gift-supplier. It was fun last year, getting to do proper Christmas wrapping and such in January! :)
posted by introp at 2:59 PM on December 12, 2015


My Quonsar gift just arrived!! It is from an anonymous mefite (who offered to reveal themselves if I asked, so I don't feel bad about taking this public guess) and given the earlier comments here I bet it came from zorseshoes! I am super, super excited about the homemade hot chocolate mix - it smells AMAZING - as well as all the store-bought food goodies (pickles and mayonnaise and hot sauce!). Thank you so much, Quonsar!
posted by jessypie at 3:19 PM on December 12, 2015 [2 favorites]


Awesome, introp! I've added your name to the list!
posted by julen at 3:19 PM on December 12, 2015


I just got the most wonderful and thoughtful Quonsmas package! Madamina is truly fantastic, thank you so much!

She got me an assortment of Japanese snacks, including a Doraemon cookie, Hello Panda, Apollo chocolate (all yum!), almond crush Pocky (a flavor I haven't had before), and Matcha Koala's March cookies (yum yum!) Next is a delightful assortment of stickers including cats, alpacas, other animals, and Kokeshi dolls! I also got a set of fast food erasers, a tiny bento box of hamster erasers, a magic growing yeti, a sushi kitty figure wearing a Randoseru (a Japanese backpack), a Tokidoki unicorn cell phone charm, and a tin of Me. Rogers' Encouragemints! All packed with the coolest snow globe Christmas card I've ever seen and humor that brought me a much-needed smile. Thank you so much Madamina!!
posted by IndigoRain at 4:09 PM on December 12, 2015


Your guess is correct, jessypie.

When I got the email with my assigned quonsee, I thought, hang on, that name sounds familiar! So I looked around on Facebook, and we do have a couple of IRL friends in common. For all I know, we may have met when I lived in Chicago.

I knew from your helpful info that you like local/regional stuff and cooking and food, but I wanted a theme. So I asked a certain singing, guitar playing, schoolteaching Evanstonian redhead you know whether you like hot stuff, and she said that y'all have eaten Thai, Indian and Ethiopian food together.

Fairway is a local and pretty fabulous supermarket, to continue the NYC theme.
posted by zorseshoes at 4:34 PM on December 12, 2015 [2 favorites]


I've been Quonsed! I was sent an incredible tin of delicious-smelling coffee (in the day we ran out of coffee, which we buy across town with no chance to replenish tomorrow, so triple bonus points there!), plus some amazing artisanal cacao tea, some gorgeous food-themed postcards, and a lovely card (with an astronaut cat on it, fit the animal count), and every bit of it was local to my incredible Quonsar, kerning! Kerning, thank you, you really nailed it. And I'm going to mail the free coffee card that was tucked into the tin to my Herdon-area relatives and tell them the internet wants them to have more coffee.
posted by SeedStitch at 5:01 PM on December 12, 2015


Omg snakeling... you really came through... This was exactly what I wanted: a very fragrant quonsmas!

Thank you so muchhhhh for the set of hand creams! They have the most gorgeous, delicious and fragrant scents! The orange & basil, and orange blossom and petitgras are my favourites. Shea and rose are very classic. What a wonderful set of creams to have!

I'm so happy!
posted by rozaine at 7:01 PM on December 12, 2015


Oh no, my quanzar gift was TOO COOL!! MsVader sent me what might be the coolest pen that ever existed, and I can't stop drawing with it! Many thanks, and also for the cool Field Notes notebooks and pencil! This is truly an awesome awesome quansmas!
posted by rebent at 7:48 PM on December 12, 2015 [1 favorite]


Petitgrain, not petitgras... whoops. Man these hand creams are so awesome! Very understated, subtle and elegant.
posted by rozaine at 12:51 AM on December 13, 2015


Dear Quons-elves and Hamsters: I just checked the tracking, and it says the package I sent was delivered on Wednesday, Dec. 9 --- if it somehow didn't arrive (stolen by jerks, eaten by giant snails, got thrown on the roof and is reachable only if you rent a crane) let me know and I'll send a replacement.
posted by easily confused at 5:09 AM on December 13, 2015


I opened my gift yesterday, and I already fired off a thank you message to but no cigar, but I want to thank her here again. My Quonsmas gift was so thoughtful and lovely. Charley Harper stickers! Sweets! A bird-watcher's notebook! Thank you, but no cigar, you're the best.
posted by lollymccatburglar at 7:24 AM on December 13, 2015 [1 favorite]


I've been Quonsed! I got the most wonderful original collage made of actual film (I am a movie lover) and some fantastic bags for my collection! I love all of it, and the art work is going up in my office. Loved it so much, was a blast to open and to read about the creation of the collage. Thank you so much to my Secret Quonsar person!!!
posted by OolooKitty at 8:02 AM on December 13, 2015 [1 favorite]


The story can finally be told. (I was getting a strong cold when I got it, and my thinky thing - brain - wasn't working well enough to do much with my package until much later, and even more later to actually go through the pictures I'd taken and make a couple of animated GIFs.)

Thank you firei, for my lovely Quonsing!

The package (note: label reads FROM: THE INTERNET) came bound together with post office-supplied binding straps - I found out why when I lifted it up and found the bottom flaps were otherwise completely unsecured! Anyhow, in the box, I found the following:
- a wrapped gift, a card
- a penguin-themed decorated box, another wrapped gift
- yet two more wrapped gifts

In all, I got one penguin-themed decorated box, 4 wrapped gifts and a card!

The card, which was wonderfully decorated both on the envelope and the card itself, and very sweet, directed me to unwrap all of it but reserve the Kong products for Fez, the cat!

Here, my dear quonsars, quonsees, and quonsczars, is all the loot. firei did a little stalking and found my Amazon Wishlist, from which she selected Stir Frying to the Sky's Edge, which is a great wok cookbook I lost in a breakup and have wanted back since, so yay! She also sent me, weirdly knowing my Doctor Who predilection, Dining With The Doctor. I also got a fantastic box of caramel filled cookies, which I ATE ANYWAY, even though there were concerns about cooking date and transit time. I'm actually still in the midst of eating them and they are FABULOUS (but I think photographing them flatteringly is beyond my technical prowess).

What is not beyond my prowess, however, is making two animated GIFs of Fez quite enjoying the large container of very strong catnip that firei sent along with a Kong refillable catnip-containing cat toy squirrel with very fascinating fluffy tail.

But these GIFs are only of Fez with the catnip. If I capture her somehow with the squirrel, I will update. :)

- Fez sniffing, inspecting and eating catnip
- Fez protesting the closure of the nip container, wide-eyed and about to set off on a full-house tear-assing, tail up , gallop

(Make no mistake, this comment IS all about Fez, after all.)
posted by kalessin at 9:07 AM on December 13, 2015 [10 favorites]


Zorseshoes--we used the mugs as part of a fundraiser for the department I am in at the university. We have a weekly departmental seminar with provided coffee, so the idea was that you'd have a seminar mug for the said weekly seminar. Mostly importantly, I think the dog on the front is adorable.

I'm really glad you enjoyed the package! I hope the holiday season is treating you well. :D
posted by lucy.jakobs at 9:35 AM on December 13, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thanks for the wonderful Quonsar package from tesseractive! It arrived Thursday, but I'm tardy on posting this because I was busy with life and also eating all the amazing Quonsmas chocolate! Thank you! My daughter helped me open the package and almost immediately helped sample the chocolate, started coloring the fun zine, and told me, "Your internet friend is so nice!" She's right, you absolutely are! Thank you for everything! I don't how I used to live in a world where I didn't know chocolate tea existed, but now my mornings will be exponentially brighter. Thank you tesseractive!
And thanks to miles per flower for being a fun and gracious quonsee to shop for, and julen for arranging the swap. My first Quonsmas was delightful!
posted by areaperson at 9:40 AM on December 13, 2015


Kalessin thank you for taking the time to MAKE GIFS and photograph and share. :) I'm glad that you like the gifts. :) And that Fez likes them too!

Rest assured I will send you fresher cookies at a later date, and will spring for faster shipping. :)

(Also - maybe the post office straps and the undone bottom tape is why the package sat in NJ for 4 days? Sorry about that...)

YAY HAPPY QUONSMAS EVERY ONE!
posted by firei at 9:48 AM on December 13, 2015 [2 favorites]


THANK YOU MEGAMI! yes the package from the Vatican had lots of cool stuff in it!


Got a lovely package of Italian gorgeousness, I am really sorry I am this late in thanking you!

The scarf is marvellously cosy, the magnet has pride of place and the chocolates and sweets were delish. Saving the cooking stuff to brighten up Xmas.

Sorry again for the delay, you must have thought god knows what!

Happy Quons- and X-mas season to your good self and to everyone!
posted by runincircles at 1:53 PM on December 13, 2015 [1 favorite]


I already wrote a note here about a pack of delicious coffee beans, which was later confirmed to be a Quonsmas gift. Then, a few days ago, a second package arrived, with a bar of equally delicious chocolate and a prettily written card with an old-school cook. This time the sender let herself be known: jetlagaddict, thank you so much!
posted by Herr Zebrurka at 8:21 PM on December 13, 2015


kalessin, Fez looks like my Ozzy. <3
posted by LobsterMitten (staff) at 8:33 PM on December 13, 2015 [1 favorite]


GASP. Are there pictures of your Ozzy?
posted by kalessin at 10:04 PM on December 13, 2015


Thank you malibustacey9999! I picked up the parcel during my lunch break on Friday and it taunted me all afternoon. I've never heard of the book of tea before but it looks very interesting. Did you know that it's a signed copy?

The spice didn't quite make it intact as the lid came off a little in transit but it made everything smell very nice. Not much spilled so I'm going to try seasoning some chicken with it next time we have a BBQ.

The cats have decided that they are afraid of red tissue paper and have backed away whenever I have attempted to entice them to play with it but thank you for thinking of them.
posted by poxandplague at 1:54 AM on December 14, 2015


Thank you to my secret quonsar! You made my Monday!

The book is a spectacular choice, and I have no idea if my sq got some secret intel on me or it was just a lucky guess, but oh my goodness, I'm going to make a lot of people happy with that book! Cheers muchly!

Here is the spectacularness.

Big shout out to the quonczars! Big thanks!
posted by Juso No Thankyou at 5:12 AM on December 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you erloteiel for the wonderful gifts! The tea is perfect and my toddlers have decided that the crocheted Christmas coasters are actually festive hats.
posted by Vectorcon Systems at 5:25 AM on December 14, 2015 [2 favorites]


I received two books about bread baking and sourdough starter! Thank you, anonymous secret quonsar! They will be well-loved.
posted by telophase at 7:17 AM on December 14, 2015


Huzzah lollymccatburglar! I'm very pleased you liked your presents. I had a great time picking out your items. You have really fun interests! May we meet someday over a pint of NW beer or a glass of caña! Happy Quonsmas one and all!
posted by but no cigar at 9:43 AM on December 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm super late to give thanks to Naamah, as I received my package last week, but it was amazing. I got an awesome plush pair of fancy smart wool socks, and local dark chocolate covered caramels and chocolate covered almonds that are sadly already all gone. Those caramels, gah they were amazing. It was all delicately wrapped in nice little handkerchiefs and packaged in a festive metal box. So basically, I'd say I win!
posted by kthxbi at 9:44 AM on December 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


A very belated but highly enthusiastic thank you to Pardon Our Dust - I didn't think I'd be able to, but I managed to wait for my wife to receive her presents AND recover from the flu before I opened my Quonsar gifts - totally worth the wait! Shown here: an awesome DIY kaleidoscope (we're already seeing what other household items look fun when viewed through a kaleidoscope), lovely homemade bookmarks (thanks, Pardon Our Dust's mom!), two delicious teas (I've been on a crazy red tea kick lately so was especially excited about that), minty marshmallows (I was actually drinking hot chocolate as I was opening my gifts, so a couple went directly in!), a rope toy for Moe (who refused to sit still for a non-blurry action shot after we gave it to her), and a stuffed dog who now shares a place of honor on my desk next to the dragonfly that xingcat sent me last year (I've named the dog 'Beanplate' because - well - Metafilter) ... there were also insect tattoos that are already in my luggage so I can share them with my niece next week (SOMEONE has to instill a love of bugs in her!), and jolly red penguin socks that were on my feet at the time of this picture ... I love fun socks =)

Thanks so much for your fun and delightful gifts, Pardon Our Dust - you knocked it right out of the park!

(On non-preview: so glad your gifts arrived safely, Neely O'Hara - hope they were all tasty!)
posted by DingoMutt at 9:53 AM on December 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


I've been traveling and then had a rough couple of days, but today I finally saw the "missed delivery" notice in my mailbox and went to the post office to pick up the package and I've been quonsed!

Thank you so much TheCoug for the coffee and chocolate -- this is so perfect, and, somehow, our tastes align perfectly. Smoky is my favorite taste for coffee and chocolate! I just had some of the mesquite bar with my wine and it is lovely.
posted by aaanastasia at 11:31 AM on December 14, 2015


zomfgwtfbbq I have been QUONSED!!!

I looked outside and this! was staring me in the face! (well, not literally. it was inside a box inside my mailbox.) ogod I cannot get over how the numbers and colors contrapose. so many countries! so much chocolate!!! I don't even know which one to start on.

tractorfeed respect! and much holiday joy! thankyouthankyouthankyou!

Io Quonsarnalia!
posted by dorian at 11:36 AM on December 14, 2015 [2 favorites]


You are very welcome dorian! Also be advised that I failed to apply the exclusive 'or' connective to your instructions... the quonsing continues...
posted by tractorfeed at 11:49 AM on December 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


thank you, tractorfeed!!!

a. you are talking to the entirely-wrong-person about exclusive-or. (or maybe the entirely-right-person?)
2. id est - the Quonsczar-Welves have previously informed me that there may be another package From Afar!
posted by dorian at 12:05 PM on December 14, 2015


I'm in Quonslimbo.
Due to a mail strike I haven't received, which is totally cool and understandable (thanks for the update julen!)
More concerning is that I don't know if my package has arrived at my Quonsee, even though the Post Office estimated it would be there by last Wednesday. Sad face.
posted by chococat at 12:07 PM on December 14, 2015


Thank you to my Secret Quonsar (apartment dweller). I got some lovely yarn and a History Lover's Guide to Washington DC which I cannot wait to read! Thank you so much!!!
posted by schnee at 1:35 PM on December 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


I know I should be patient and all, but I'm getting antsy about my Quonsee. Tracking says they should have received their gift on December 4th. Did it get stolen? Lost? Did it go under their Christmas tree? Do they have the patience of saints? Are they totally nonplussed by the marmosets in the package? Or are they just being shy? Sighhhh...
posted by RedOrGreen at 3:16 PM on December 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


I am so glad you liked it, kthxbi. Smartwool socks are supposed to be flat-knit at the toe hems, so I hope that is true, and my family has those chocolates every holiday season--the caramels are especially popular! Happy Quonsmas!!!
posted by Naamah at 3:41 PM on December 14, 2015


Hooray, Dingo Mutt! I had so much fun putting it all together for you.
posted by Pardon Our Dust at 4:50 PM on December 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


Yay! I have been quonsed! A lovely but slightly squished package arrive bearing Danish postage stamps! Opening up the pack I found a red tin full of spicy tea that had clearly been handled by apes in transit! But no worries, the tea still smells delicious and I look forward to drinking it on a rainy dark night. Underneath the tea, a book of Scandinavian Quonsmas cookery, which is super great. (I am so happy this came before my annual Nordic solstice party!)

Thank you so much nat! Now, what should I cook first?
posted by vespabelle at 6:18 PM on December 14, 2015 [2 favorites]


People!

There are dozens and dozens and dozens and dozens and dozens and dozens and dozens of emails that are awaiting answers (to such perennial favorite questions like: Did you get it? or Hey, when is that package you sent supposed to get there?) from folks. I may be underestimating the number.

Check your junk mail. Check your spam folders. I'll send out a few dozen more.

If you thanked your quonsar privately, we might not know you got your gift!

If you got your present and keep procrastinating thanking your quonsar, thank them! If you do it in the thread, we'll notice and update our Spreadsheet of Status.

Don't make us send the Hamsters of Randomization after you. I took away their martini shakers at 11 AM (I was on a conference call and that racket did NOT sound professional), and now they are looking for something to do.
posted by julen at 6:36 PM on December 14, 2015 [4 favorites]


I have no idea who my secret Quonsa is, but thank you.

Padded sole Vikings' socks? Get out of my head. I'm gonna wear these to work. I love the hat and pecans as well, but damn, you set a high bar with those socks.

Thank you so much. Quonsmas makes me misty.

-Sphinx
posted by Sphinx at 6:55 PM on December 14, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thanks for the lovely goodies from Seattle, quaking fajita! Not even gonna tell you how much of the coffee is already consumed. ;)
posted by rhiannonstone at 8:56 PM on December 14, 2015 [2 favorites]


My quonsee thanked me privately, just so's y'all know.
posted by patheral at 1:03 AM on December 15, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm sorry for the explosion, poxandplague. Perhaps that's why your kitties aren't fussed with the tissue paper, maybe it smells like Mudgee spiciness.

I do hope you enjoy the book though. I thought it might be nice to read while you have a cup of tea.

(And no, I did not realise it was signed!)
posted by malibustacey9999 at 4:30 AM on December 15, 2015 [1 favorite]


rozaine, I'm so glad you like the creams, they're my favourite too.

I wish to apologise to my quonsarer, because I received my package weeks ago *and* I've forgotten their name >.< I don't brain well in December...

I got a stackable ginger grater/lemon juicer/spoon holder that was put to use immediately, and some Japanese chocolates :) Thanks!
posted by snakeling at 5:56 AM on December 15, 2015 [2 favorites]


Glad you are enjoying it, rhiannonstone!
posted by quaking fajita at 7:45 AM on December 15, 2015 [2 favorites]


My Quonsee also thanked me via Mefi mail.
posted by PussKillian at 7:54 AM on December 15, 2015 [1 favorite]


We hit another milestone this morning so here are some more stats while my cookies are baking:

Statistics, Statistics, Statistics

437 participants

301 presents have already arrived (68.9%!)
  09   presents have been marked as delayed (although a subset are probably already en route) (2.1%)
  40   are known to be in transit (9.2%)
  18   might have arrived; we’re awaiting confirmation (4.1%)
  16   folks have emails from us enquiring what is up waiting for them (with dozens more to come) (3.7%)
  25   gifts are a mystery to us. They’ll be getting the what is up emails soon. (5.7%)
  25   have not arrived* (5.7%)

  02   times two quonsczars answered the same email at the same time
  02   of 3 quonsczars who have gotten their gift (also who have confirmation their gift arrived)
  20   folks have signed up to be potential second chancers - volunteers hail from the US, Canada, and Australia!
            We are still taking volunteers! Drop us a line if you are interested.
  01   second chancer already deployed

  07   people have gotten their gift but are saving it to open later! (not all the same people as last update!)
  86   different animals represented in gifts (that we know about) so far
  56   gifts (that we know about) have included books so far.
            If we included notebooks, that number would probably increase by 50%.

  21   number of countries packages will be sent from, delivered to, or end up in
  03   people who are receiving their gifts in a different country than they sent their gifts from!
  01   mail strikes have occurred this year.

  02   packages have been unrightfully returned to sender (and sent right back to quonsee)!
  01   packages have been officially marked lost/stolen

* The Packages that have not arrived include packages that have to cross oceans as well as customs officials, packages sent late, and packages whose senders really need to get back to us.
posted by julen at 8:27 AM on December 15, 2015 [3 favorites]


I'm so, so late, but I want to thank my secret quonsar for the handmade copy of The Flyers of Gy by Ursula Le Guin, the issue of Two-Fisted Librarians, and the Toronto Bicycle club pin! It's like you know me.
posted by domo at 9:02 AM on December 15, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm enjoying reading this thread every day -- people are getting such amazing packages! For purposes of the stats, julen, I'm still waiting to be Quonsed . . . no package has arrived for me (yet) :).
posted by Annabelle74 at 9:10 AM on December 15, 2015


Julen, I volunteer to be a second-chancer!
posted by probably not that Karen Blair at 9:33 AM on December 15, 2015 [1 favorite]


Put me down for the second-chance list, too! I adore Quonsmas, and don't want it to end!
posted by easily confused at 11:10 AM on December 15, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have received delightful rocks, and rather nice biscuits (which I am eating now) and some lovely looking blueberry jam (which I am saving for later).

I collect small rocks that represent places I've been, or emotionally significant moments, and I could not be happier to have some that have come here from The Internet, and can now mean metafilter to me. A place I read more than post, but which has stretched me, and taught me, and saved me in lots of different ways.

It has been a rather long few days, and a hectic month, and I was made cheerful by the Quonsar gifts - thanks so much headnsouth
posted by Gilgongo at 1:01 PM on December 15, 2015 [4 favorites]


Thanks to my Secret Quonsar I now have a lovely Tupuxuara to fill out my prehistoric menagerie, along with a big container of Garbage Bag Candy. I didn't know garbage bag candy was a thing, but it is and it's delicious!
posted by brundlefly at 1:27 PM on December 15, 2015 [3 favorites]


LOL they come from The Internet but also from the Appalachian Trail.

I knew that people from MetaFilter (esp. the subset of quonsers) would appreciate receiving a bunch of rocks in the mail. That is just one of the ways in which MeFites are better than different from my family.

Glad customs didn't snag the jam. Enjoy!
posted by headnsouth at 1:27 PM on December 15, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oooh, thanks for volunteering for second chancers! I've added your names to the list and will probably send out emails late this week/early next week!
posted by julen at 1:40 PM on December 15, 2015


Aaaah! I missed this post because I kept searching for Quonsmas instead of any of the other related terms. Thanks to julen for pointing out its existence to me!

I got my presents in the mail last week. I was going to wait until Christmas to open all of them but I CANNOT. I opened one of them this weekend and it was a jar of honey from my quonsar's farm! I have been putting it in my bedtime tea and on my toast and I am just so delighted! There are two more presents and an envelope that says it should be opened last. I'm going to open one on my upcoming birthday and the rest on Christmas Eve so I can savor the experience. Or I will open them sooner to prevent dying of curiosity. We'll see.

This is my first quonsmas and it is the best! I had SO MUCH FUN putting together my quonsee's gifts. I can't tell if I'm more pleased by my own presents or the fact that my quonsee likes theirs so much!
posted by congen at 1:45 PM on December 15, 2015 [2 favorites]


Oh my goodness!

I got a really awesome, beautiful book (The Atlas of Remote Islands) in the mail today! It really does lead to daydreaming and looking at more maps and all sorts of delightful things!

Thank you, minervous, for the delightful gift. I keep petting it!
posted by julen at 1:58 PM on December 15, 2015


I am the worst, because not only did I send out my gift late (it's on its way, dear Quonsee, I promise, and I wrote you a poem to try to make up for it), but I just went to my P.O. Box, which is literally three addresses down from my apartment, to find my SQ gift had been sitting in my box for OVER A WEEK. Thank goodness there were no perishables! (If you saw my stack of 20-page engineering technical reports to grade, you might understand why the past couple of weeks have been dodgy). I have been quonsed superbly by machine! (Whoa low user number, I am not worthy.)

Two ethically sourced chocolate bars (you can add otter to represented animals on products, but I don't think there are any otters, or GMOs, in them) and an adorable festive kitty ornament. Thank you so much, machine. This will make the grading slightly better, and this way, there's a chance the chocolate will last until my birthday on Friday! (A small chance.)
posted by ilana at 2:24 PM on December 15, 2015 [1 favorite]


You have made me very happy tonight, Quonse! Thank you so much!!

Oh hey triggerfinger, that was me - I usually don't fess up about who I sent to, but thanks for the kind words. Especially so since buying gifts is so! hard! ugh.

Anyway, after years of suboptimal gift buying I have come to the conclusion that if I need to buy something for a stranger it's probably best to go for something practical. I mean, who doesn't need another tote bag right? On the other hand it seems sort of lame next to the hand-made art pieces some Mefites have sent me in the past but at least it's locally made by people who have more artistic talent than I do.

I had forgotten this thread even existed but apparently my quonsmas present in in the mail and I was thus reminded of it.

Merry Quonsmas one and all.
posted by GuyZero at 2:28 PM on December 15, 2015 [2 favorites]


Yeah, brundlefly, that was me.

Can I tell you how tough it is to choose toy dinosaurs, when you don't want to just go with the superstars like T. Rex and Triceratops (I figured you've got plenty of T. Rexes) and when the quality ranges from "realistic" to "is this an eraser?" Let's just say, the Carnegie Museum doesn't have the best ones.

I was gonna hide ol' Tupux in the container, Cracker Jack style, but that little bag he came in had holes, and I didn't want to get chocolate and powdered sugar all over him.

I'm really glad you liked your stuff.
Joyful Quonsmas!
posted by Mister Moofoo at 2:47 PM on December 15, 2015


Thanks so much, Mister Moofoo! The little guy has an honored place in my collection. I didn't have any pterosaurs yet!
posted by brundlefly at 3:29 PM on December 15, 2015


Neat! Things walking around on their wings are one of my favorite weirdnesses. Happy to share.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 3:42 PM on December 15, 2015 [2 favorites]


I thought I had been thoroughly Quonsed with my earlier gift from okayokayigive, but no. The thoughful gift I recieved last week was just a tease, because today I am the proud owner of a bag of Buffalo hot wings soap (who knew?), accompanied of course, by a bag of celery stick soap. The best. I love it, and I can't wait to suds up the armpits with a couple of chicken wings. My kids can keep their dirty little paws off my fancy new soaps, they are all for me.
posted by Cuke at 3:51 PM on December 15, 2015 [3 favorites]


ok, so I have been severely lax in not trotting out this iconic portrait/graffito from almost precisely a decade ago in Manhattan.

"Scooby-Q, wo büssu?"


(yes, I did the graffiti. yes, I took the photo. and, yes, that is Quonsar, cloaked in mystery, and fishpants, as always.)
posted by dorian at 6:57 PM on December 15, 2015


I have been quonsed from Prague! I actually squealed when I pulled the package from the mailbox and saw the pretty Czech Republic stamps. Thank you to the lovely aaanastasia for sending me all the chocolate. (I was so tickled by these that I had to take a picture with their Canadian cousins.) I also received a beautiful stamp of my first initial that I am going to use all the time and cute pins that will look perfect with the pins I've been collecting on my fabric-covered wall at work. I'm am filled with the Quonsmas spirit!
posted by atropos at 7:18 PM on December 15, 2015


Today I came home from a long trip, and found a perfectly wrapped, perfectly square box, perfectly centered on my door mat. It was from emmling! According to the card, the box had made the long trip from Osaka across the Pacific, to the middle of a square city in a square state.

A row of six smaller boxes was nestled inside--Japanese candy! Matcha caramels? Yes please! There are also matcha and kinako Kit Kats, and a special, pure chocolate Kit Kat (just one, wrapped like a cigar). I had heard about these mystical, special Kit Kats through the inter-tubes, but never thought I would get to try one.

But wait, there's more! A very smooth pen, fuzzy socks depicting a little bare-bummed creature on them, and a pin depicting a cat laying on his back, with crumbs on his belly. Add a laptop open to MetaFilter, and it's basically a picture of me right now.

Thank you so much emmling! So much effort went into this box, and it completely made my day. Happy Quonsar to all, and to all a cat from the internet!
posted by MrBobinski at 7:42 PM on December 15, 2015 [2 favorites]


MrBobinski, you're welcome! I'm so glad you liked it! I forgot to mention in my note that the pen is erasable, so there's that aspect to it too. Happy Quonsmas!
posted by emmling at 8:22 PM on December 15, 2015


I have been obsessively renewing this thread about every half hour hoping to hear the joyous news that Quonsmas -- which had been promised to arrive by last Thursday -- finally reached the mail box of my lovely and most deserving Quonsee, but, alas and alack, her postal carriers must have been delayed by a gazillion grumpy Grinches. Or, mayhap, become so haunted by the ghosts of Jacob Marley and Ebenezer Scrooge that they were compelled to stop by London to personally deliver a Christmas goose to each and every one of Tiny Tim's descendants before continuing on their appointed rounds. If the present doesn't come by Quonsmas, by gum, I'm going to employ the international private investigator firm of Holmes, Watson, Milhone, and Hamsters, Ltd. and Get. To. The. Bottom. Of. This!!! Quonsee, dear Quonsee, please don't despair. Sincerely -- and oh so apologetically, Your Secret Quonsor
posted by LeftMyHeartInSanFrancisco at 9:17 PM on December 15, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you SQ for my lovely CDs - always good to get some new music. Happy holidays all.
posted by srednivashtar at 1:15 AM on December 16, 2015


Thanks a lot to Sweetie Darling - sweet handmade coasters in a special Doctor Who color pallet - thank you so much! I love them! They were already in use this morning.
posted by mathiu at 2:28 AM on December 16, 2015 [2 favorites]


I thanked Kbar1 By MeMail but not in this thread for the wonderful ostrich-, toucan- and owl-themed gifts...organizers, please note! And my Quonsee thanked me in this thread: Jeri, glad you liked the earrings and I hope you didn't already have that book.
posted by homelystar at 5:07 AM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thank you crocomancer for the fabulous bronze acorn. It was a perfect choice - beautiful, unusual and I love supporting British craftspeople and artists.
posted by Megami at 8:06 AM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


We've been ordering some Christmas stuff online and this week it's all started arriving. Everyday there's a package or two, and today I asked my daughter to answer the knock on the door and there was a mountain of boxes too big for her to carry in. When I went to get them I saw one box that looked different from the rest and thought "what could my wife have possibly ordered from Finland?" Then I saw my name on it and it clicked! Quonsmas!

The whole bunch of Finnish chocolate probably won't make it to the weekend. And we have a thing about keeping mints in the glove box of the car, (we call them 'car mints', not too creatively) so the boxes of pastilles (one salty liquorice and one TAR!) will promptly go in there and be enjoyed on the next ride. A very cool carved wooded honey dipper and butter knife are already in my special utensil drawer and the reindeer keychain is going on one of my keyrings today. Lastly, the homemade mixed CD will be enjoyed tonight with a pint of Canadian beer and the aforementioned Finnish chocolate. Pic!
Thank you so, so much severiina. You really nailed it.
posted by chococat at 10:48 AM on December 16, 2015 [3 favorites]


earlier today I participated in what I believe to be the first-ever fake-recidivist-quonsmas!!! (nota bene: the 'first-ever' part may be entirely untrue. videlicet: lies.) - a new tradition for the ages!

also I believe it was my first-ever non-anonymouse-quonse, after all these years of quonsing.

dearest fake-quonsee (you and your spouse know who you are) - the usps-Thing currently predicts: expect a parcel of bizarre wonderment on Saturday 12/19. (ok, the 'wonderment' part may also be partially or completely lies.)

also also? the hilarity, do let it ensue! (why, yes, THERE WERE OCTOPODES. ok no they were merely cephalopods. *runs*)
posted by dorian at 12:52 PM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


I love how weird this place gets.
posted by heyho at 1:14 PM on December 16, 2015 [5 favorites]


The wait for the Turkish Delight from Homeboy Trouble was definitely worth it, as well as the other delightful-non-delight items! A mix of useful and fun, stickers and mittens among them, and my favorite, foreign foodstuffs. And, it arrived gift wrapped, which someone told me I should not do when sending internationally, but now I'm just going to err on the side of festive. Although I learned this lesson too late for this year.

Thanks again, Homeboy Trouble!

My SQ gift was also sent out late, I am so sorry quonsaree!
posted by wintrymix at 1:52 PM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


I was quonsed last week, I was just so busy at work I haven't been able to get back here to say thank you. Thank you, The Elusive Architeuthis! I got some delightful candy from Colorado! There's almond toffee and peppermint cookie bark. What's cookie bark?, you ask (I did!). This is cookie bark! It's dark and white chocolate bark with cookie pieces in it. So yummy (and pretty!). Thanks so much; I just love Quansmas time!
posted by Weeping_angel at 2:02 PM on December 16, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thank you for my gift! I love the donut pillow cases and will be dreaming donut dreams tonight. The candy cigarettes are a nice touch and the cup holder will make it easier to identify my work-issued drinking receptacle. The cat magnet will look great on the fridge.

Thank you so much!!!!!
posted by LizBoBiz at 2:07 PM on December 16, 2015


I have been truly quonsed: anonymously, brilliantly, from the motherland. Once again it's a reminder that I probably leave my truest self online here. I will add more when I have a little more time, including scans of the hilarious 'quest' that my quonsar went through to assemble my parcel. Thank you so much.
posted by holgate at 3:23 PM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oh wow, I've been Quonsed!!!!

I came to find a package awaiting me . . . containing the Mad Men Coloring Book!! Woo hoo! I'm a HUGE Mad Men fan and I'm really into adult coloring books -- and I didn't already have this one, so yay! I'm excited, and truly grateful! I believe the MeFi name of my benefactor is brundlefly, if I'm reading their handwriting correctly.

Also . . . the enclosed card indicated this this was just part 1 of my Quonsar gift . . . I still have the arrival of part 2 to look forward to! Sweet :).

Thank you, brundlefly!
posted by Annabelle74 at 4:07 PM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


To my oh-so-super-Secret Quonsar, wherever you are out there in the big wide world:
I'm heading home for the holidays tomorrow at a vomit-inducing, pre-sunrise, waaaaay-before-the-post-comes time, so if you were expecting my thingamajig to arrive in the next few weeks, I won't be able to experience its joy until the New Year. Our dogsitter will be sure to take the package inside if it comes, but please don't feel bad if you aren't showered in gratitude immediately! I promise you it will be flooded upon you once I get back home.
Jolly jolly fun fun.
posted by Dorinda at 4:14 PM on December 16, 2015


Thanks to oceanjesse for tasty treats! And some BBQ sauce which I will require some instruction as to the best way to use it. ;) The candy is pretty tasty; hard candy was a good choice because it forces me to not eat it all immediately in, like, an hour.
posted by curious nu at 4:54 PM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


Metafilter: work-issued drinking receptacle

yes, this sounds about correct.
posted by dorian at 5:16 PM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


I received my Quonsar gift today! It's a set of lovely Montréal-themed notecards! I can't wait to deploy them at the right time. Unfortunately, I do not know the name of my Quonsar, but merci infiniment ! C'est exactement ce que je voulais.
posted by invokeuse at 5:36 PM on December 16, 2015 [2 favorites]


Neither of my Quonsee's packages have tracking information so I'm just twiddling my thumbs hoping they show up in the thread. Even if they hate it, I want to know it arrived!
posted by sgrass at 6:02 PM on December 16, 2015


I received my mysterious quonsar package today! It was mysterious in several ways. First, no indication of the identity of my quonsar; second, my gifter picked up on my love of cozy mysteries and sent me a nice selection of Dorothy L. Sayers. The books were wrapped in an eclectic mix of fabric remnants and surrounded by an assortment of threads and ribbons. I think some arty crafting is in order. Thank you for the intriguing and entertaining package!
posted by mimo at 6:50 PM on December 16, 2015


You're welcome, Annabelle74!

I believe the MeFi name of my benefactor is brundlefly, if I'm reading their handwriting correctly.

I can certainly understand how my handwriting would be an issue.
posted by brundlefly at 7:44 PM on December 16, 2015 [2 favorites]


Uh, so in continuing to be The Worst, I just checked my tracking number and Canada Post estimates delivery of my small package to be DECEMBER TWENTY-NINTH. That is, almost three weeks to send a package within the same country. I should have just gotten on a bus and turned up at my Quonsee's door, except that would have been creepy. I really hope that changes, but if not...I hope it helps you have a happy new year, dear Quonsee. I'm so sorry.

Was there some sort of Canadian postal strike nobody told us about?
posted by ilana at 8:51 PM on December 16, 2015 [1 favorite]


Reports from the field this year do indicate that Canada Mail is making a STRONG grab for this year's title of Worst Postal/Delivery Service.
posted by julen at 9:02 PM on December 16, 2015 [3 favorites]


Oh man. This sucks.
Small correction, though: it's Canada Post (not Canada Mail.)
As in, you Post it but they don't Mail it.
posted by chococat at 10:14 PM on December 16, 2015 [5 favorites]


I have a mystery benefactor! Thank you, anonymous mefite, for looking at my FanFare posting history, noticing what a NERD I am, and sending me Doctor Who and Hannibal-related gifts. I am much obliged to whoever you may be!
posted by sobarel at 5:33 AM on December 17, 2015


If you need any more second chancers, please add me! I'd love to put together another gift.
posted by thetortoise at 5:46 AM on December 17, 2015


Hmmm. USPS says that a package I sent on the 14th in MA departed Nashua, NH on December 15th. Expected delivery date in California is today, but there've been no updates since being in Nashua. Perhaps it is being teleported?
posted by darsh at 5:54 AM on December 17, 2015


I am very late on the thanking, please excuse me, we've had a rough few weeks in the the NakedMutt household (nakedmolerats + dingomutt) with car breakdowns and flus, oh my.

I was QUONSED by athenasbanquet , who sent me a truly amazeballs homemade assortment of candies that were both so delicious and pretty that I thought they had to be store-bought -- the adorable shortbreads were the first to be nommed. Then I saw in your comments that you do a lot of baking! We loved them!

I also received an adorable fox mug that gets along well with our assortment of whimsical coffee mugs , and the most perfect crush-the-patriarchy cross stitch to hang on my wall, I assume also handmade. I am pleased that my posting history reveals that patriarchy-crushing gifts are most welcome :)

Thank you, Athena! Happy quonsmas!
posted by nakedmolerats at 6:06 AM on December 17, 2015 [3 favorites]


Chococat:
Small correction, though: it's Canada Post (not Canada Mail.)
As in, you Post it but they don't Mail it.


Hah!

thetortoise, I've added you to the list of second chance volunteers! Thanks!
posted by julen at 7:05 AM on December 17, 2015 [1 favorite]


nakedmolerats, HOORAY! I am terribly sorry about your last few weeks but I'm so glad everything made it ok and that the nommables have been nommed. Yes, both the treats and the embroidery were made just for you, and I did indeed stalk your profile a little bit to determine whether patriarchy-crushing was something you enjoyed. :) I hope it brightens up your office a little bit. Merry Quonsmas, one and all!

Julen, I would also love to volunteer as tribute a second-chancer. Quonsmas is my favorite time of year!
posted by athenasbanquet at 9:31 AM on December 17, 2015


Cellar Door, I do apologize, but I just got your second package into the mail yesterday; I've had some rather dramatic family events in the past week and couldn't get to it earlier. The postal dude told me delivery would be either Saturday or Monday. Please forgive the rather Spartan packaging. Hope you enjoy!
posted by holborne at 9:43 AM on December 17, 2015


Athenasbanquet, speaking as the other half of the NakedMutt household, I also have to thank you for the amazing goodies (the fact that I work from home while nakedmolerats does not has made for a true challenge of self-restraint!). Everything you made was supernaturally tasty - I hope that if you have business cards you've listed "buttermancer" as your title.
posted by DingoMutt at 9:57 AM on December 17, 2015 [3 favorites]


Reports from the field this year do indicate that Canada Mail is making a STRONG grab for this year's title of Worst Postal/Delivery Service.

Canada Post: Delivering the Holidays (In June)

(Glad my package got through to my quonsee though!)
posted by nubs at 10:08 AM on December 17, 2015


Did you know: Marguerite Meyers, 83, and Leonard Firlick, 90, of Eagan, MN married about a year after they met at church - and after they signed a prenuptial agreement.

91 Minnesota lakes are named Long Lake.

Those are just 2 of the things I learned in my new book "Crazy Stuff Minnesota" from my fabulous Secret Quonsar schnee. She sent me a bunch of packages to unwrap and inside I found:

*Warm fuzzy green and red striped NHL socks for my chronically cold feet
*3 different flavors of Chocolate On A Stick to stir into hot milk (only 2 are left)
*A box of Bob's Sweet Stripes soft mint candy peppermint sticks
*A bag of Caribou Coffee to fuel my addiction
*the aforementioned Crazy Minnesota book

In short, a whole lot of love from the Land of 10,000 Lakes (but according to the book, there are closer to 12,000 lakes in Minnesota).

I gave no guidance to her but she found all those gifts that I adore. I had so much fun opening it and eating the chocolate immediately and will be working on the peppermint sticks soon. And, I feel like I have a new friend.

Thank you schnee. You are a great SQ and you made me feel really happy.

Thank you also to julen and all the elves who helped organize this wonderful gift exchange.
posted by Kangaroo at 4:02 PM on December 17, 2015 [3 favorites]


I got home very late last night to find my gift -- marked OPEN IMMEDIATELY -- waiting outside the door. For some reason, I thought it would be a good idea to open it in bed ...

... this was a great idea through the Icelandic wool hat (love it; worn immediately) and stripey Minnesota scarf. It still seemed like a good idea through the Minnesota beer and chocolate (maybe? there are no English words on the package) and miniature dice game. I grew up in Detroit, so the surprise box of Midwestern weirdness really warmed my heart.

Then I pulled out the cold, wet, smelly package of fish!

Sphinx, thank you so much! Your gift has filled me with the perfect blend of holiday cheer and anxious dread. Besides getting to surprise my husband by handing him a package of lutefisk in bed at midnight (and how often do you get to do that?), it's hard to express how much joy I will get out of offering all my holiday visitors a taste. (P.S. If I can recommend something back to you, Kitchens of the Great Midwest is one of my favorite novels of this year, and the first chapter is about lutefisk, though unfortunately not in a very complimentary way.)

tl;dr: My secret quonsar mailed me a dried whitefish soaked in lye and turned to jelly. Can I eat this?
posted by teditrix at 4:47 PM on December 17, 2015 [17 favorites]


Oh gawd, pretty sure that's in violation of the Geneva Convention.
posted by mudpuppie at 6:03 PM on December 17, 2015 [3 favorites]


tl;dr: My secret quonsar mailed me a dried whitefish soaked in lye and turned to jelly. Can I eat this?

LUTEFISK! Listen carefully, you must NOT eat this, your husband must NOT eat this, do NOT give any to holiday visitors. Just place the lutefisk on the floor, back away slowly and contact the proper authorities to come and dispose of it. I think you'll be okay, but you need to act fast.
posted by triggerfinger at 6:25 PM on December 17, 2015 [5 favorites]


(also, I love all the Minnesota-themed gifts)
posted by triggerfinger at 6:27 PM on December 17, 2015



When he was a boy, my uncle mastered the art of fake-eating lutefisk, gradually moving it under a thin rounded shell of mashed potatoes, and acting as though he had eaten so much lutefisk, he had no room for mashed potatoes. (Candlelight helps.)

I also have a bone to pick with the universe in that we merely had masses of delicious clarified butter with our lutefisk, but I am given to understand that there are places in the Midwest that serve bacon with the lutefisk, and now I feel that I have been robbed lo, those many childhood Christmases.
posted by julen at 6:43 PM on December 17, 2015 [3 favorites]


What a lovely surprise awaited me on getting home this afternoon. The screamingly wonderful Guster4lovers had packed me a box filled with the most delightful American comestibles, ranging from spicy salts to enchilada saws and some truly epic tea. It was my last day of work before the holiday season, and I couldn't have asked for a nicer way to welcome it, thank you so much!!

I would also like to acknowledge her heroic search for a postal service to Australia from the US that was both timely, and cost less than a small mortgage in a regional area. I share your pain, bud, every year!
posted by smoke at 3:12 AM on December 18, 2015


I just got my package from the post office. The weather is horrible here, cold and rain and endless grayness. So I really needed this to get a little bit of that Quonsmas spirit going.

Thank you, vespabelle! I love the yarn. I never really buy myself these special, fancy yarns so this is a treat. I've already been petting it and rubbing it to my cheek (to find out how soft it is) but don't know yet what it will become. I've been vaguely thinking about knitting something/s during Christmas break, so I need to do some planning (which is at least half the fun, says the person with million ravelry bookmarks...). Also the pouch is adorable and perfect for traveling knitting projects.

And I already know where the stickers are going. I'm going back to university with all the youngsters, so it might be time to decorate my binders a bit! That will make them think I'm very cool and hip and with the times, wont it? :P

So thank you and merry Quonsmas to you!
posted by severiina at 3:48 AM on December 18, 2015 [2 favorites]


So very glad that your Quonsmas presents finally arrived, LizBoBo. I hope you have as much fun with them as I had in picking them out.
posted by LeftMyHeartInSanFrancisco at 9:08 AM on December 18, 2015


Gah! Slipped out for a haircut, come home to a failed delivery notice. I can pick up the package tomorrow.

Either it's quonsmas, or a package I ordered has made it here in record time...
posted by nubs at 11:22 AM on December 18, 2015


If folks want to let their eyes drift up to the header (or to click on the little hairless person icon) and see if they have any memail waiting from us (julen, phunniemee, or arcticseal), we'd be mighty obliged. If you want to take the time to explore your junk mail email folders or the accounts you signed up for sq with for emails from us, I highly encourage it.

In other words, we have lots of unanswered messages. Your quonsars want to be sure the gifts got there! Your quonsees want to know when to look for their gifts! The Hamsters of Randomization (and Egg Nog) are giving away signed pictures to one lucky MeFite!
posted by julen at 11:57 AM on December 18, 2015 [4 favorites]


Thank you, Secret Quonsar! Your package came in the mail today. I won't open it until Christmas, but it must be books, because it says "books" on the front. Just what I wanted!

Seriously, this is the only present I'll get this year, and it's really appreciated. Thank you!
posted by Kevin Street at 1:19 PM on December 18, 2015 [1 favorite]


Your quonsees want to know when to look for their gifts!

This! Pretty darn cruddy holiday season here (Paris, broken arm recovery, et cetera ad fatigarum) in which Quonsmas is one of my rare joy-bringing experiences. Quonsar, whoever you are, I'd love to hear from you. I'm sure other quonsees would too!
posted by fraula at 1:38 PM on December 18, 2015 [2 favorites]


I'VE BEEN QUONSED! I'd send a personalized thank you, but I can't decipher the exact user name signed on the lovely card. I received a delightful assortment of things (which I feel must have been picked by someone who actually knows me)--a perfect blank notebook, an adorable flash drive (how did my quonsar know I was in such need?), delicious chocolate, a fantastic fridge magnet to add to my collection. Thank you so much. I adore this tradition, and I love this fabulous community. Merry Quonsmas to all!
posted by Go Banana at 7:33 PM on December 18, 2015


My gift came today! I got the coolest little dice game thing called "Rory's Story Cubes" which is meant to inspire creativity. My Secret Quonsar gave no clues at all to their identity, but I still want to say thank you so much for this terrific little box of inspiration! I can think of more than a couple of ways I will make use of your gift over the coming year. Well done!
posted by ThatCanadianGirl at 7:35 PM on December 18, 2015


I'm ashamed to admit my gift actually came almost a week ago but I didn't have a chance to post until now.... But I was thrilled to receive an awesome little box of Florida goodness from Bob the Thief! Bob sent me some super soft socks, one pair with skiers and snow and the other with penguins, walruses (walrusi?) and other cute animals. He also sent me a bottle of honey which I've already begun devouring, a cool mystery book and a plastic alligator named Fred who is now presiding over my desk at work. I love everything! Thank you so much, Bob the Thief!
posted by silverstatue at 8:30 PM on December 18, 2015


ok, this is definitely the year we start breaking ALL OF THE RULES.

I already did the dreaded double-secret-probation-reverse-requonse to my actual-quonsee. (look, there needed to be octopodes)

I helped start fake-recidivist-quonsmas (er, I think. hopefully.)

and in an entirely-new (probably not) bizarre tradition, I just now spamazoned-the-absolute-hell-out-of my quonsee from last year who sounds like they have been having an awful holiday and we've all been there, and I'm sorry but none of it is going to arrive until 1/5-1/6-ish.

also? everyone needs a hug.
posted by dorian at 8:50 AM on December 19, 2015 [6 favorites]


I'm kicking myself for not paying the extra for tracking and insurance since it looks like Canada Post may have lost my quonsee's gift. If it doesn't show up by January, I'll re-quonse you!
posted by atropos at 11:54 AM on December 19, 2015


And to think I freaked out about the mailing deadline being 12/1 in one place and 12/2 in another.
posted by rhizome at 12:38 PM on December 19, 2015


I got quonsed too! And my gifter remained anonymous (unless I had too much wine that night), so big fat thank you!!! I got a lovely box of fragrant and awesome tea, and a printed 'local oddity' that was utterly cool. (And I was quite charmed by the note 'reusing my quonsar's giftwrap, because i am a dirty hippie') Rock on Victoria hippie!
posted by tatiana131 at 1:03 PM on December 19, 2015 [1 favorite]


I have been quonsed, all the way from Helsinki! It looks like my Quonsar chooses to remain anonymous, but the choice of gift is awesome - a copy of Small Scenes from a Big Galaxy from Finnish photographer Vesa Lehtimäki, which we discussed in this Metafilter thread.

I love it! Fits right into my alley of Star Wars geekery alongside my plan to try and interest my children in some stop motion animation stuff with their iPads this Christmas!

Thank you Secret Quonsar!
posted by nubs at 2:44 PM on December 19, 2015


Thank you to my secret quonsar!!! I got a cool exploding skull 3D puzzle. Since I am a science nerd/mad scientist this will be really cool to have at my desk at work. Thank you!
posted by Jaelma24 at 4:04 PM on December 19, 2015


I've been quonsed! Locally roasted coffee always warms my heart. Thank you!
posted by a halcyon day at 8:58 PM on December 19, 2015


I have been quonsed! Thank you to Ghidorah for the spice blends and all of the other goodies (I've long held the belief that one cannot have too many rubber chickens, and I've never seen one with such a shocked expression on its face). Thank you for making the time to send this in the midst of everything! New ingredients are always a winner for me. I will definitely take you up on recipe offers when you have the time.

Merry Quonsmas!!
posted by duffell at 6:18 AM on December 20, 2015 [2 favorites]


Update: Canada Post has changed the expected delivery date to the 22nd, which is a much better outcome than the 29th, and it is finally in the correct province. Huzzah!

Canada Post: Making You Feel Better By Dramatically Lowering Your Initial Expectations
posted by ilana at 10:09 AM on December 20, 2015 [4 favorites]


I have been quonsed! Funnily enough, she's quonsed me for my first quonsmas and got me awesome goodies then too!

Thanks for Carmicha for getting me tickets to go to a roller derby bout here in Chicago!
posted by astapasta24 at 4:24 PM on December 20, 2015


@atropos I put tracking on my quonsee's gift but it stopped tracking right after it left the country to go to the US. Thanks a lot USPS.

I hope it reaches my quonsee soon :(
posted by rozaine at 12:18 AM on December 21, 2015


I have been quonsed! My quonsee did not reveal their mefi name, so I won't reveal their real name just in case.
I got an assortment of goodies! Animal crackers, pens, notepads, tea (and an infuser!) and some delicious snackables. How did you know that I love lychees, SQ? Thank you for the wonderful gifts, you've turned this otherwise grey day bright.
posted by cozenedindigo at 7:01 AM on December 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


Octopod number two (smaller and red!) arrived safely on Saturday, but I spent all weekend cooking and baking and then acquiring The Sick from my husband, and have not gotten back to the thread until now. Thanks again, holborne! They are very cheerful little desk companions, and are clearly quite happy to be reunited.
posted by cellar door at 7:14 AM on December 21, 2015 [2 favorites]


Oooh, cozenedindigo -- those little Muji notepad keychains are the best!
posted by mochapickle at 8:46 AM on December 21, 2015


Hahaha, cellar door, you and I seem to have a weird mind meld of some sort: not only do we both have that Bryan Garner book, but we appear to have the exact same clock radio. Please tell me that the "B" alarm on yours isn't broken the way mine is, as that would be just a bit too weird.

Anyway, glad to see the octopod love flowing!
posted by holborne at 10:00 AM on December 21, 2015


Hi everyone - Just wanted to drop a line in here that I wrote an essay about Secret Quonsar for the Intersect blog of The Washington Post. I'm not linking to this thread but thought a heads-up might be appreciated. Will drop in the article link when it runs! Thanks, tooloudinhere.
posted by tooloudinhere at 11:00 AM on December 21, 2015 [7 favorites]


I am convinced that that clock exists at some sort of space-time nexus. Every time I show someone a photograph where it's in the background, they inevitably say, "Hey, I have that clock!" It is the weirdest thing.

(I can neither confirm nor deny the functionality of the "B" alarm; the clock lives on my desk largely for the purposes of iPod amplification, and I fear that testing this will leave my nexus theory in ruins. In the words of Mulder et al., I want to believe.)
posted by cellar door at 12:42 PM on December 21, 2015


oh, btw? I have been double-quonsed-From-Very-Far-Away!!! I was at-home-sick today and foolishly did not answer the door, so the quonse from tractorfeed sent from SKorea has been reset to arrive tomorrow sans-signature but unfortunately I will be at my office all day so it will be literally almost 24 hours before I can report back.

and this year, it gets even weirder and more-sideways...

- my fake-recidivist-quonsee & spouse were supposed to receive their thing on Saturday but it still sez out-for-delivery-today.

- my 2014 quonsee who has possibly been burned by her Quonsar, will receive both of her random-dorian-noise à-Paris no longer in January BUT ON WEDNESDAY. ok hier komm' 'n-Wort-für'n-Ewigkeit: Zufallsrauschen.
posted by dorian at 3:52 PM on December 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


hapax_legomenon, my delightful Quonsar, thank you! My parcel arrived today, traveling from one US coast to another. Dear readers, all should be jealous of the delicious homemade caramel sauce and fancy coffee beans sent my way, and a wee letterpress card and lovely note! Yes, these all go under the tree. Well, briefly, before heading to the kitchen, because let's be honest, the salted honey caramel sauce won't last long in this household, and the coffee is on the agenda first thing tomorrow. You made my day, hapax_legomenon, thanks!
posted by enfa at 4:34 PM on December 21, 2015 [2 favorites]


An excellent Quonsmas this year, thanks to the thoughtful and inventive EsotericAlgorithm. An orange envelope made of bubble wrap (a present itself!) wended its way to Wisconsin, ultimately revealing the "Brilliant Weekly Scheduler." This calendar is cunning, clever and also very cool-- enough structure to offer guidance, enough flexibility to become truly bespoke. And the paper! Smooth, with faint graph lines, and an interesting size: swoon!

But that's not all... I have no idea whether Esoteric Algorithm saw my pizza rage post in the Emotional Labor thread, but it turns out he works for a pizza company that actually operates a shop in my super remote corner of the world... and he sent me a gift card!!! Let's just say that I won't be purchasing a pepperoni pizza with green olives on half and black olives on the other half. Thanks so much, Esoteric Algorithm: you've made me very happy.
posted by carmicha at 5:28 PM on December 21, 2015 [3 favorites]


I cursed and fumbled to pull on my pants when the mail carrier knocked loudly on my door at 7:30 this morning, but had an immediate shift in mood when I discovered a strange package all the way from the UK. Inside were a great old Instamatic camera loaded with old film containing who knows what joys, and a copy of one of my favorite childhood games. Thanks so much Greenish, you really made my day!
posted by TheCoug at 5:29 PM on December 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


Gah! I neglected to say that the orange bubble wrap package came all the way from South Korea, even though Esoteric Algorithm lives in the PNW. How cool is that!?!
posted by carmicha at 5:35 PM on December 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


The tables have turned, and the Quonsee is now the Quonsar!

Last year, I quonsed ilana. This year, she quonsed me! I'm waiting until Christmas to open it, but ilana has great taste so I'm sure it will be fabulous. This is so exciting!

And I didn't even have to wait until the 29th. Or even the 22nd. Thanks, Postie!
posted by Banknote of the year at 6:46 PM on December 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thanks Gilgongo!

I got two awesome pint glasses from Hook Norton Brewery to add to my collection along with what looks like a delicious chutney made with the brewery's beer. Haven't tried it yet, want to find something just right to pair it with. I also got a nice handwritten note and a picture.

Pics here. Merry Quonsmas to all!
posted by Drinky Die at 7:27 PM on December 21, 2015 [3 favorites]


Statistics of Seasonal Status.

437 participants
371 presents have already arrived (that we know of) (84.9%!)
  07   presents have been marked as delayed (although most are already en route) (1.6%)
  29   are known to be in transit (6.6%)
  08   might have arrived; we’re awaiting confirmation (1.8%)
  04   folks have not responded to our emails asking if they got their present (0.9%)
  16   gifts have been marked “not yet” and we are waiting on quonsars to communicate. (3.7%)
  02   have been assigned to second chancers (0.5%)

dozens of emails and memails need answering.

  29   folks have signed up to be potential second chancers - volunteers hail from the US, Canada, the UK, Europe, and Australia!

  06   people have gotten their gift but are saving it to open later! (not all the same people as last update!)
  92   different animals represented in gifts (that we know about) so far
  62   gifts (that we know about) have included books so far.
            If we included notebooks, that number would probably increase by 50%.

  02   packages have been unrightfully returned to sender (and sent right back to quonsee)!
  04   packages have been officially marked lost/stolen/liberated by marmosets
  02   packages will likely join those numbers in the next few days.
  02   packages have survived a mail strike!

Behind the Numbers

A big chunk of the gifts that have not arrived are gifts traveling from one country to another.
Another big chunk of the gifts that have not arrive are shrouded in mystery.
A smaller chunk of gifts that are delayed are delayed due to vendor shenanigans.
Some folks have worked out a delivery schedule with their quonsee that suits both their schedules.
People are pretty cool.
posted by julen at 7:59 PM on December 21, 2015 [17 favorites]


*big squeezy hug for julen*
posted by infini at 8:27 PM on December 21, 2015 [9 favorites]


Yay, Banknote! I'm so glad you got it and I hope you like it (let me know after you open it!) I was amused when I got your name for this year. Hooray, Canada Post, for far exceeding my incredibly low expectations!
posted by ilana at 8:37 PM on December 21, 2015 [1 favorite]


effing-marmosets.
posted by dorian at 11:57 PM on December 21, 2015


my local PO just now kindly called me to ask about resetting delivery on tractorfeed's extra-quonse. I had requested on their website for it to happen today - but they wanted to confirm it. I told the dude it was secret-santa-From-Afar (look, I did not want to confuse them) and I let the guy know that I signed the note-thing and taped it on the outside of my mailbox, and he was so amused by the tone of my voice and said totally will be delivered today and so now I am just counting the hours before going-home-time.
posted by dorian at 7:10 AM on December 22, 2015


Thank you so much to my (unidentified) secret quonsar! I love love love getting books in the mail, and the fact that it came with a bookmark and a cheesy fridge magnet (two of my biggest weaknesses :) ) just made my day even more.

Thank you again!

And thanks to julen and elves for organizing this, yet again (and for following up with me about my package arrival!)
posted by gaspode at 7:42 AM on December 22, 2015


It is time. I have felt the icy hand of quonsar upon me.

It is jeather's doing.

I am preparing. When the moment comes, I will know my fate. I'm totally not opening it before then.
posted by tel3path at 8:05 AM on December 22, 2015


There has been a Quonsening. Have you felt it?
posted by Rock Steady at 8:26 AM on December 22, 2015


Hi guys - here is the link to the Secret Quonsmas article on The Washington Post! ("An ode to online 'Secret Santas,' the nicest things on the Internet.") Hope you enjoy, and Merry Quonsmas!
posted by tooloudinhere at 8:32 AM on December 22, 2015 [23 favorites]


My package arrived yesterday. I will post pictures after work, but I just wanted to thank Too-Ticky for the gifts, from the bottom of my heart, they are better than I imagined they could be.
posted by release the hardwoods! at 9:18 AM on December 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oh! I'm so glad that it arrived! It's been almost a month, so I was getting worried. I'm very relieved, thank you for posting!
posted by Too-Ticky at 9:23 AM on December 22, 2015


Re: this promise upthread. Boom.

It's Christmas, Theo - it's the time of miracles.
posted by joseph conrad is fully awesome at 9:24 AM on December 22, 2015


Thank you for the three wisest men, the star and the green pendant! I had to open it. My spirit is lifted.
posted by cometwendy at 12:15 PM on December 22, 2015


had a truly awful afternoon but came home to seeing an international package!!! we'll see if I can resist opening until Friday...
posted by dorian at 1:14 PM on December 22, 2015


Too-Ticky, may I share pictures of the gifts?
posted by release the hardwoods! at 6:57 PM on December 22, 2015


Dear secret quonsar, I know not yet who you are, but I must tell you that I had to depart for the holidays before your package completed its journey, so do not be discouraged by my lack of gratitude...the elves told me at the check-in that it is on its way, and I look forward to opening it in the new year!!!! :)
posted by Naamah at 7:33 PM on December 22, 2015


If you haven't yet taken a moment to drop a thank you note to your quonsar (or asked us to do it) or posted your thanks in here, now is the perfect time to do so. If you *think* you did (but aren't sure), check your Memail or email to make sure you have thanked them!

Your quonsars generally just want to be sure the gift is there, but saying thanks is also awesome!
posted by julen at 7:58 PM on December 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


Also!

second chancers, I have gotten your replies and added your awesome info about availability/region to our second chancer spreadsheet. (I would respond individually, but I am tired from driving and family-ing and watching heart-attack-giving basketball.)

Some of you will be hearing from us soon; some of you will be hearing from us in January.
posted by julen at 8:13 PM on December 22, 2015 [3 favorites]


Hi guys - here is the link to the Secret Quonsmas article on The Washington Post! ("An ode to online 'Secret Santas,' the nicest things on the Internet.")
Hey whoa my pic of the awesome stuff I got from severiina is the first thing in that article. Very cool.
Not cool is the joke I keep making (mostly to myself) that always goes something like
"Do you want some of my chocolate? It's Finnish."
"No there's still some left."
posted by chococat at 10:03 PM on December 22, 2015 [4 favorites]


I have a bad habit of making a lot of Finnished jokes. Suomi.
posted by infini at 11:31 PM on December 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


release the hardwoods!, sure! They are gifts, they are yours to do with as you see fit. I'd be honoured if you want to share pictures.
posted by Too-Ticky at 11:42 PM on December 22, 2015


Checking in belatedly to report that I have been happily Quonsmased, but I don't know my Quonsarer because there was nothing on the packages and a cryptic couple of notes inside. (MeghanC, is it possible that it's you?)

I asked for trinkets and/or edibles from the MeFite's hometown, and my quonsar didn't disappoint -- he/she sent THREE things from various places he/she has lived.

Behold!


The Buckeyes arrived first -- I don't know how I managed to resist them before I went out of town for the holidays, but I did.

Next came the coffee syrup, which will be turned into delicious hot milky drinks, stat. I am a coffee wuss who only likes diner-style coffee (i.e. brown water), but I love coffee-flavored things.

And then came the delightfully named Cajun Foreplay barbecue spice rub, which will most definitely get a lot of use -- we are all about the spicy, piquant meats in our house.

Thank you, secret sender, and hope to hear from my quonsee soon -- I sent hers to Europe, so hope it hasn't gotten delayed.
posted by vickyverky at 4:25 AM on December 23, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thanks to Runincircles for the chocolates and stationery bits. 2016 sprint meetings may be using bird shaped post-its for a while!
posted by crocomancer at 4:35 AM on December 23, 2015


I've been happily quonsed!

Thanks to the awesome Amy Lecteur for pens, a lovely notebook and a beer glass. One can never have too many of any of those things.

Happy Quonsmas one and all.
posted by brilliantmistake at 9:07 AM on December 23, 2015


I've been quonsed! Thank you so much donpardo - I haven't yet unwrapped them because I don't have many other actual gifts for Christmas Day so I'm saving them up, but I could see what they were from the packing slip and I'm very excited to get stuck into two books that have been on my to-read list for literally years! And thank you to julen too for checking in with me and to citands for sending me a lovely thank you memail for her quonsmas gift :) This is my first year of quonsing and it's been a delight all round! A++, would quons again.
posted by theseldomseenkid at 1:24 PM on December 23, 2015 [1 favorite]


i have been quonsed, and I am stunned.

A beautiful colouring book, "Enchanted Forest" - I've been holding off buying one for myself because, budget priorities, ya know. But this one is perfect.

A jar of gluten-free coconut choc-chip cranberry cookie mix. The only thing I love more than alliteration is cookies! Baking 'em and eating 'em!

Home-made vanilla essence. People, you have never smelled anything so divine. I cannot wait to use it in something yummy. (I may also dab some on my wrists for perfume purposes tomorrow for Christmas.)

And last, but definitely not least, I said I liked tacky shot glasses. I got not one, but TWO, toilet shot glasses! I laughed. And then I cried because everything was so beautifully wrapped and the gifts are all so perfect and the card was just lovely, and I was just completely overwhelmed.

Thank you SO MUCH, my dear SQ! You have totally and utterly made my day.
posted by malibustacey9999 at 2:59 PM on December 23, 2015 [6 favorites]


I have been quonsumated! Thank you chasles, for the spice mixes, the olive oil, and the really snazzy plate. Strangely enough, I also sent spice mixes and a hand written letter to my quonsee, so that was kind of fun to see come back around. I'm looking forward to trying the spices out, thank you!
posted by Ghidorah at 7:40 PM on December 23, 2015 [2 favorites]


Vickyverky, that was, in fact, me--I'm wildly impressed at your detective work, and sincerely apologetic for the weird notes and awkward shipping arrangements. I hope that you enjoy it! (In the interest of full disclosure, I've never actually eaten a buckeye due to allergy reasons, but they're apparently the food of my people, so. The coffee milk and Dinosaur rub, tho, I stand by.)
posted by MeghanC at 9:16 PM on December 23, 2015 [1 favorite]


I read the entire thread to see if anyone mentioned my gifts, and your comment about there being three stood out. Thank you so much!
posted by vickyverky at 3:48 AM on December 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


malibustacey9999, I would love to see a pic of those toilet shot glasses. I know someone they'd be perfect for.
posted by vickyverky at 3:49 AM on December 24, 2015


(I'm giving buckeyes in an Ohio State mug to someone for Christmas this year: they are definitely The Food Of Your People, if your people are Ohioan!)
posted by ChuraChura at 5:25 AM on December 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


I dragged my present opening out over weeks and weeks - first a jar of honey from my quonsar's family farm (on my toast every single day) shortly after the package arrived, then a vial of homemade vanilla extract (in my chai every afternoon) on my birthday, and a lovely handmade pad of paper today or all the letters I write. And last, but not least, was a kind and handwritten note from introp and Ms. introp. Thank you so much!!! This was a kind and perfect gift and a delightful introduction to Quonsmas.
posted by congen at 9:31 AM on December 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


What an awesome collection of fun gifts I've received from palindromic! Thank you so much, and you needn't have worried, it got here with plenty of time to spare! We laughed out loud at the lobster card, and the fridge now has its very first magnet. Love every bit of it, but especially the brilliant 'Hark a Vagrant' t-shirt. Hope you have very happy holidays, and thanks again!
posted by chrismear at 11:35 AM on December 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


Thanks again to Too-Ticky for the wonderful gifts! I want to share these with everyone. The first gift is a book cover with a journal inside and the book cover was made by Too-Ticky! I am so impressed because is it really well made and very creative! It’s an old circuit board with leather and absolutely beautiful stitching. With very handsome brown and tan colors and matching leather. I keep picking it up and thinking how it feels so nice and solid and good to hold. I love books that feel that way. Even the pen is nice! I absolutely love this. Thanks Too-Ticky!

Here’s a picture of it
https://c2.staticflickr.com/6/5694/23918239055_b990b7e1d9.jpg

And holy smokes the next gift. An antiquarian field guide to alpine plants. The most beautiful color illustrations AND translations to English and French. It is perfect in every way and I will cherish it forever.
Here is a picture of the book:
https://c1.staticflickr.com/1/741/23918239065_aea53b6b5c.jpg

The Ericaceous:
https://c1.staticflickr.com/1/624/23918239095_06e9368160.jpg

My poodle loves the alpine too and wants to say thanks:
https://c2.staticflickr.com/6/5682/23918239115_d96206d9c9_z.jpg

Thanks again Too-Ticky! I hope everyone’s having a great time of the year!
posted by release the hardwoods! at 12:45 PM on December 24, 2015 [6 favorites]


Yay! I love those pics and I'm so glad that you like your gifts. Secret Quonsar is the bestest Quonsar of all possible Quonsars!
posted by Too-Ticky at 2:13 PM on December 24, 2015


It being gift-opening morning, I eagerly opened my Secret Quonsar's pile of gifts. My suggestion was "something you'd like to receive yourself", and as it turns out my Quonsar might well be an American version of me, because all the bits are perfect.
  • Lego (something I got every Christmas as a child),
  • beautiful tiny Christmas lights (we've moved house and need some new decorations),
  • obligatory socks,
  • a Christmas album (I collect Christmas songs and make a mix for friends and family every year), and
  • some photos of modernist architecture (a mystery location—I'm guessing a Scientologist or Mormon campus).
Just perfect.
posted by robcorr at 3:46 PM on December 24, 2015 [4 favorites]


Once again, my hubs didn't want to wait until Christmas Day to open presents, so I finally got to open my SQ gift tonight. When it finally arrived at my office (because for some reason, the post office didn't want to deliver it to my house) I took it home and was going to leave it in the box until it was present-opening time. However, my hubs also hates having cardboard boxes hanging around, so I had him open the box and put them into opaque bags that I promised I wouldn't look inside. He was befuddled at the size and shape of the items, and ended up using two bags to re-package them. And so they sat until tonight.

They were the first presents I opened, and it seems as if my anonymous person (but I think I know who they are) took me quite literally when I said that if they wanted to destash some machine washable yarn in my direction. Behold my large amounts of mostly acrylic yarn, along with a pair of quirky socks and a pair of lovely burgundy slipper socks which I suspect may be handmade.

Thank you, O quonsar, for such a lovely and thoughtful present.
posted by TrishaLynn at 5:41 PM on December 24, 2015 [1 favorite]


Also, one of the pairs of socks is meant to look like a pair of western boots, which one wears to ride horses. I'm still counting that as an animal-related present. ;)
posted by TrishaLynn at 5:42 PM on December 24, 2015


WOW JEATHER.
First, I found a big leaf of maple candy at the top of the box. It's like you read my mind. I was just thinking about maple candy. It is DELICIOUS.

Then I opened it and found a stained glass abstract image of a brown cat gazing out a window. I love cats and I love stained glass and I love that this was in nonobvious, caramel colours.
I LOOOOOVEEE ITTTT
posted by tel3path at 3:11 AM on December 25, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thank you Quonsar for my lovely gift and for waiting patiently for me to open it. At first I was pleased, if somewhat mystified, to get the very functional-sounding Ink-Lings saturated hand cleaning towelettes, along with all the information about Woods Hole and a beautiful card. After going through the WHOI magazine (which will come in useful as well, since Mr. Mumkin is currently teaching oceanography), I decided to open the ink-lings. Imagine my surprise when I found not moist towelettes, but rather a wonderful and special glazed-from-the-ocean cup. I love it! Thank you thank you.

Also, I must thank my secret double-Quonse for the delightful surprise octopus, which, believe it or not, makes a fabulous hat!

Merry Quonsmas to all!
posted by Hal Mumkin at 5:54 AM on December 25, 2015


I also forgot to say that I really like the animal wrapping paper too.
posted by Hal Mumkin at 6:00 AM on December 25, 2015


As my last present this morning, I opened my Quonsar gift, which was so many kinds of awesome. raising sand gifted me with MANY tastes (and sounds!) of Memphis - rubs, bbq sauces, caramels, two CDs, Sun Record stickers, and a shot glass! Oh all that and a bag of chips - Memphis style BBQ that is :) I don't know how she did it but this is totally what I would have bought for myself on a trip to Memphis. In fact I've been toying with the idea of going there and this may have tipped me over the edge.

Here's a picture, complete with an Elvis postcard (no cds - they're already in the queue.) Quonsmas Taste of Memphis

Thank you so much, raising sand - it was the perfect ending to a pretty good morning :)

Happy Quonsmas!
posted by lyssabee at 7:40 AM on December 25, 2015 [2 favorites]


Thank you to my lovely SQ for the jam and mustard sampler! I look forward to trying everything.

Loved the cute origami'd note, too!
posted by zennie at 9:45 AM on December 25, 2015


Oh my goodness! A wonderful and oddly-shaped parcel arrived here from Birmingham [England, not Alabama] on Wednesday, and I opened it today. Inside were a couple cards with a note from my SQ brilliantmistake, mug declaring that Brum's Bostin, and a book written and hand-bound by brilliantmistake's partner, who is also a MeFite!!

Sadly, the mug did not fare so well in its journey. But while the crack across the bottom compromises its ability to hold liquid itself, lining it with a small plastic tub allowed it to become the new and happy home of a plant, so I will get to enjoy it all the same! More, even, since it will never be hidden in the cupboard. :)

And the book! My god, the book is GORGEOUS -- hand-bound, the 27th in a run of 50, with a cover of marbled paper. It even smells nice. I've only just started, about 20 pages into A Spell to Conjure Violets, and I LOVE it so far. The story is completely transfixing, and the author has a wonderful voice. It also makes me really, really happy to have something so rare & special.

I took a couple pictures, but they do not do it justice. It's all so very lovely! Thank you, brilliantmistake, and Happy Quonsmas!
posted by Westringia F. at 10:33 AM on December 25, 2015 [4 favorites]


I got some kicky Cowboy-themed drinking glasses, almond crunch, salted vanilla caramels, and a really groovy camp light! Thanks so much secret Quonsar!
posted by valkane at 2:02 PM on December 25, 2015


A package arrived late on the 24th from London, Ontario (don't know from whom, though!) so we celebrated quonsmas on Christmas! Thank you mystery quonser for just-in-time maple syrup, which we had with our breakfast, and tea that we're looking forward to trying, and sweets that we've put aside for a day when we have not already had too many sweets. The local postcards were an added bonus. Thank you!
posted by headnsouth at 6:57 PM on December 25, 2015


I finally opened my own gift and it was a lovely assortment of spice mixes from Maine with maple sugar! A lovely surprise. I'll try to out when I recover from Christmas dinner and the massive pile of cookies we have. And I love maple so what could be better? Not much. Thanks so much.

Merry Christmas and happy holidays to everyone.
posted by GuyZero at 7:51 PM on December 25, 2015 [1 favorite]


My gift has arrived! To my secret quonsar, who chose to remain anonymous - thank you! I am a voracious reader but haven't read any of the Ripley books - I look forward to it now! They are right up my alley :)
posted by samthemander at 12:06 AM on December 26, 2015


Work had me away for a while, so I was late picking up the package that had arrived at the office. I've since been in a rush to get Christmas together, so I'm only now getting to my thank you.

Check out this haul, folks:
Dark chocolates of some kind, which disappeared rather quickly.
• A colourful little wind-up Panda on a tricycle.
• A cute whale-print tea towel from Now Designs.
• A Bay-Yorkville subway station button, which I can sport whenever i'm there, about twice a week.
• Three books!! A Murder of Quality by John Le Carré, The Cloudspotter's Guide by Gavin Pretor-Pinney, and The Deltoid Pumpkin Seed by John McPhee, none of which I’ve read, and only the first of which I had ever heard. Very much looking forward to digging into these on my commutes.
A big “IF I WERE 21 I’D VOTE FOR KENNEDY” button, I’m guessing from 1960, which I will wear along with the flag of the District of Columbia button, as I watch the madness of US Election Day this November, safe in a sunny haze up here in Canada, drinking from my Map of D.C. pint glass.
A nice little tin of artisanal salt from the Jacobsen Salt Co. Enough for some boiled eggs, or perhaps the wounds of my enemies if they're deserving enough.
A 1973 Polish tourist map for the Okolice Rzeszowa, where I had never planned on going, and now probably still won’t, but darned if it isn’t a cool map.
• And finally, some French Bonbons Barnier lollipops that make me Quimper with delight.

All-in-all a delightful score of the weird and wonderful – like a giant loot-bag from some mefi birthday party!
A huge thank you to my Secret Quonsar for the big box of quonsmas fun!
posted by Kabanos at 1:51 PM on December 27, 2015 [2 favorites]


I got my gift on Sat. It's a fantastic "Where's Ralph Waldo Emerson?" t-shirt and a Noam Chomsky secular saint candle, which now holds a place of honor among the weird stuff I have displayed on my desk, right next to the Marmot chewed bic lighter.
posted by Gygesringtone at 12:16 PM on December 28, 2015 [2 favorites]


So... I'm holding off on the next set of statistics until we hit 400 Yes! It Arrived!s and/or 10 responses to outstanding emails (there are probably 3 dozen+ emails out there that need answerin').

We're in a weird holding pattern, waiting for recipients of packages we have marked as En Route or Not Yet (earlier in the month) to tell us if they have arrived. We're also waiting for responses from folks we've marked as Maybe (Tracking says Yes, but no confirmation from the quonsee) and Checking In (Wherein we send an email that is basically: Did you get it? Did you? Did you? Did you?). There's also a handful of folks who we know are delayed for one reason or another.
posted by julen at 8:11 PM on December 28, 2015 [3 favorites]


Quonsmas is a very strange time of year: up through last Saturday, it was about 65dF nearly every day. today? snow! ha!
posted by dorian at 4:16 AM on December 29, 2015


Thank you julen and the Quonsmas elves for all your hard work! Hope that your Quonsmas has been filled with joy and relaxation :)
posted by fraula at 7:19 AM on December 29, 2015 [4 favorites]


I opened my parcel from ilana and was delighted to find a game of Sushi Go. I'd heard very good things about it, and I'm very excited to try it out. Ilana also sent over a super-cute CN Tower keychain, which is great because a friend gave me a spare key to their place and I've been meaning to get a keychain for it for months.

Big thanks!
posted by Banknote of the year at 9:49 AM on December 29, 2015 [1 favorite]


A big “IF I WERE 21 I’D VOTE FOR KENNEDY” button

This is what I'm asking for next Quonsmas.
posted by triggerfinger at 10:47 AM on December 29, 2015 [2 favorites]


I have been quonsed, and quonsed mightily! The fabulous Go Banana sent me a box all the way from Canada with two amazing-smelling spices, two teas, two hot chocolate blends, a really awesome pen from Japan, and a very shiny Ticonderoga pencil! I don't know what I am most excited about, but getting this box today just before leaving work due to the snowstorm and coming home to a little box of quonsmas has made what could have been a hard day so much easier. And now I will make tea! Teaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!

Thanks Go Banana! You are the best!

Thanks to the mighty quonczars for organizing! I can't wait for next year!
posted by bile and syntax at 1:08 PM on December 29, 2015


A parcel arrived in the mailbox today all the way from Toronto! Canadian chocolate (which does feel suspiciously soft in today's 30C temps, so I've popped it safely in the fridge), an awesome and completely unique silkscreen printed tea towel, and some TTC Subway buttons! Along with a chatty explanatory note - thank you so much chococat, what a wonderful surprise to end the year with.
posted by fever-trees at 7:46 PM on December 29, 2015 [2 favorites]


a strange and interesting (and, with hope, quite heretical) Quonsmas Thought suddenly came to me - is there any sort of Krampus-analogue? but then I realized, idiot, not only is there one, it is obviously Quonsar himself. and there's no need for a separate name, because Quonsar is both Quonsar and Quonsar. (sort of similar to Дід Мороз?)

but then, here is where religious schisms start (and then the death-killing. and then the cats feel even more motivated to do the sleep-murdering...) - is Quonsar dualistic or inherently monocoque?

(the irony/extra-hilarity is, of course, that at the very first Council of Nicæa, Nikolaos of Myra punched Arius in the kisser during a furious argument about this very subject. (and then Constantine put him in Santa-Claus-Timeout-Jail for a few days. hmm, to my knowledge, Quonsar has only ever been put in jail by policemen, not moldy old emperors...))
posted by dorian at 4:50 AM on December 30, 2015


Happy New Year to me! I received my parcel from Westringia F. today and it is perfect for both me and Rufus. Frangos! Dog biscuits made from spent beer grains and peanut butter! Three (3!) kinds of tea, including my beloved genmaicha, a super-fancy gunpowder, and O'Connor's cream (which sounds amazing) from TeaGschwendner (which I must visit the next time I'm in Chicago [or Germany!])! Some super-local Sweet Comb Chicago hand and body balm! Aaaaaaand two very, very cute buttons: one Merry Quonsmas! one made by songdog and another silly dog one. (You couldn't know that it corresponds very well with my door mat.)

Thank you so, so much. I was all set to have a tolerable but lonely New Year's Eve and this has brightened things considerably. Merry Quonsmas! indeed!
posted by minsies at 7:28 AM on December 31, 2015 [4 favorites]


So ... my mother casually mentioned to me that the Gavle Goat was torched after Christmas. ("Police said he would be questioned once he sobered up.") Egads!

You know what that means: if the goat is in ashes, we turn our eyes to making sure our quonsar has been thanked! (Also, the quonsczars really start side-eying packages that have not arrived. Fear us, delivery drivers, customs agents, jerk-toothed thieves, and Marmoset Liberation Front-sters!)

(more detail on the torching!)
posted by julen at 10:13 AM on December 31, 2015 [2 favorites]


New Year, New Statistics

437 participants
408 presents have already arrived (that we know of) (93.4%!)

  11   presents have definitely not arrived yet. (2.5%)
  06   presents are “en route” (1.4%)
  04   might have arrived; we’re still awaiting confirmation (0.9%)
  03   folks have not responded to our emails asking if they got their present (0.7%)
  02   presents have been marked as delayed (but with scheduled delivery window) (0.5%)

  04   second chancers are or have deployed packages (0.7%)
            fact checkers will note that this pushes us to 438
            after we assigned one second chancer, the postal service FINALLY delivered a gift thought long lost.

  02   folks are about to be assigned to second chancers (out of the Not Yet group)

  01   people have gotten their gift but are saving it to open later!
  94   different animals represented in gifts (that we know about) so far
  66   gifts (that we know about) have included books so far.
            If we included notebooks, that number would probably increase by 50%.

  02   packages have been unrightfully returned to sender (and sent right back to quonsee)!
  04   packages have been officially marked lost/stolen/liberated by marmosets
  02   packages will likely join those numbers in the next few days.
  02   packages have survived a mail strike!

  01   person is in danger of being banned for a year. CHECK YOUR MEMAIL.

Behind the Numbers

At least half of the outstanding gifts are international. As a result, we’ve been more reluctant about declaring some of those gifts lost than we have been gifts sent within a country. I expect that to change later this week.
posted by julen at 8:30 AM on January 1, 2016 [13 favorites]


It arrived!

Thank you Secret Quonsar whoever you are. It was so nice to find the package in the mail box today after my first (and annoying) day back at work after and 10 day holiday. The fridge magnet rover is so cute and I've already had fun with it and my dogs. They're all what the heck? And one tried to jump up to get it. The candy looks yummy but the best is the Slinky! Last one I had was over 20 years ago. I think everyone needs a Slinky.

I'm now going to go play with it on the stairs and watch both dogs and cats go what the heck? again.
posted by Jalliah at 2:25 PM on January 4, 2016


Ok so my holiday blowout is finally coming to a close and after being booted from my childhood bedroom due to sibling procreation (too many people trying to celebrate in this house!) I am finally the last visitor here at my parents' house, and I was able to get back into the closet where I had left the packing slip telling me that it was telophase who sent me the most excellent collection of shot glasses. I don't think I've mentioned that I have a collection of aforementioned drinking vessels so she basically used some kind of super sophisticated genius algorithm to figure out that I have lots of university-themed shot glasses and then added to my collection with four different universities in Texas which she and/or her family have attended or worked at. We librarians have lots of super powers. Thanks telophase for the perfect gift, correctly sized and weighted so as to not cause my luggage to be over-stuffed or -weight when I schlep back to the UK.

Happy Quonsmas one and all, and Go Horned Frogs!
posted by tractorfeed at 6:38 PM on January 4, 2016 [1 favorite]


04 second chancers are or have deployed packages

One of them arrived at their second chancee! Many thanks to lovely aaanastasia for the Venetian treats :) Delicious chocolates and very pretty Venetian mask earrings! (with surveillance from curious kitties!) I went to Venice twelve years ago and love Venetian masks, thank you! And those chocolates are seriously, truly delicious, wow.

Also a big thanks to dorian for surprising me with gifts that arrived just in time for Quonsmas. dorian was my Quonsar last year and went the extra mile to get something to me on seeing that this year's Quonsar was MIA. (And unfortunately still is, I haven't received anything, I'm afraid. I hope they're OK.) There's this salt candleholder that I'm really enjoying for wintry warmth, and OCTOPUSSY!

Joyeux Quoël à tous !
posted by fraula at 12:22 PM on January 5, 2016 [8 favorites]


My held mail came today, and I have to thank mathiu publicly as well as privately for the origami paper and fountain pens, because it was just such a perfect Quonsmas choice. Thank you again for your thoughtfulness, and a merry belated Quonsmas to everyone.
posted by Naamah at 3:45 PM on January 6, 2016 [2 favorites]


Thank you biffa! I just received my parcel today, I am sorry about the delay in delivery - I chose my work address as my home address is even worse for delivery of parcels, but it did not work well because the postal services only delivered it after 28 December when no one was here at either the neigbours or us, until today.
I look forward to taste the Cornish Ale chutney, and will try the frankincense and myrrh chocolate right now. The Cornish sea salt wil be lovely to cook with!
Thank you so much for a lovely Quonsmas parcel. And I do like the black card!
posted by 15L06 at 4:47 AM on January 7, 2016 [1 favorite]


Hurray! I was a bit concerned my bodged packing might have spilled the goods all over Vienna's central post office. It sounds like everything was in one piece. I did some chocolate testing from the same range myself and it seemed pretty good. Happy Belated Quonsmas!
posted by biffa at 5:58 AM on January 7, 2016


Quonsmas is never late, nor is it early, it arrives precisely when it means to.
posted by MsVader at 6:50 AM on January 7, 2016 [10 favorites]


Some say it arrives precisely when it needs to.
posted by Rock Steady at 11:11 AM on January 7, 2016 [4 favorites]


In this case about one day before I got put on the naughty step.
posted by biffa at 11:20 AM on January 7, 2016 [4 favorites]


again sorry biffa for causing a delay in delivery, the Austrian postal services suck so using the work address was still the safer way. the district branch office delivering to our home address is notoriously unreliable and we have lost some parcels in the past.
In fact some of the lovely sea salt did escape (the lid cracked) but I was able to salvage it all as the box itself was tightly sealed. but it made a funny noise so when the receptionist gave it to me she was curious what made the funny sound (like a sand filled toy) My coworkers got all curious of course (this was first day back for most of us and there was a huge mountain of post distributed so everyone gathered to help) and so I found myself trying to explain... and I ended up sharing some of that delicious chocolate and trying to distract them from just who might send it to me. i seriously hope no one figures out just where I spend so much online time.
posted by 15L06 at 1:16 PM on January 8, 2016


belated thank you to anonymous Quonser from Georgia who sent me a totally unexpected second helping of quonse in the form of a 3D printed octopode. I've gotten lots of kits this year -- including some Strandbeests (from myself, not the internet), a twin lens reflex camera from my first Quonser, and this new one. It will all take some days of assembly (which, if I'm honest with myself, will take literally weeks as they sit on a shelf, mocking me in their incompleteness and daring me to stay up an extra hour to work on them), after which I can pose the creatures and photograph them with my new camera. SWEET
posted by cubby at 6:39 PM on January 10, 2016


I came home from vacation last night, to the glorious sight of a parcel from Darkest Connecticut lurking on my front porch! nonsecret-super-reverse-fake-recidivist-quonsmas?! yes, exactly!

said parcel contained a lovely-looking box which in turned contains some truly amazing, delicious, beautiful-looking chocolates. (ok, ok, s/contains/contained/g- because, now, a seahorse (I was informed it's called "A Night in Tunisia"! mmmspice - pepper and coriander! and the crimson coloring is superb!) and a butterfly (white chocolate-cream and ?raspberry? so good.) and one of the truffles have mysteriously disappeared already. and also the piano (caramel!))

I am saving the nougat-pistachio-square for last. I love chocolate, but I also love pistachios and I also-also love nougat!!! unholy-Quonsar-ESP?!

(((apologies awful phone pics)))

I must have driven right through that area so uncountably many times, between storrs-mansfield / nyc! it's probably safer that I never knew that particular confectioner existed!!!

thank you treehorn+bunny!!! it was absolutely perfect and brought needed-smiles and much joy. even more welcome since I was exhausted finally getting home and had to get up early today for first day back to work.
posted by dorian at 7:49 AM on January 11, 2016 [3 favorites]


Mailed! and should arrive Wednesday. I had so much fun putting your gift together. Hold tight, dear quonsee!
posted by probably not that Karen Blair at 9:43 AM on January 11, 2016 [1 favorite]


Hint: A sledge hammer was involved! So liberating!
posted by probably not that Karen Blair at 9:45 AM on January 11, 2016 [1 favorite]


My original Quonsar came through! Hej Harald74, tusen takk! Jeg elsker salmiak! (The lovely card was made by his wife.) I lived in Finland for two years and so shouted "TYRKISK PEBER!!!!" when I saw it. I used to go through bags of the stuff up there, haven't had it in more than a decade. Also now I can trick colleagues into trying traditional Scandinavian "sweets" muhahahahaha.
posted by fraula at 11:21 AM on January 11, 2016 [4 favorites]


again sorry biffa for causing a delay in delivery

Sorry, wasn't having a go at you, its swings and roundabouts with the postal services, I couldn't believe it when this thread opened on November 14th!
posted by biffa at 11:43 AM on January 11, 2016


This year is/was weird, mailing-wise. Although Canadian mail and customs services made an early bid to win the Crown of Inexplicable Delays, the UK and Europe teamed up at the end to snatch the Crown from Canadian hands.

On the plus side, mail between the US and Australia was a little faster this year than in past years.

Also, it feels like more people mailed later than the deadline this year than in past years (proportionally), which is not my favorite trend of the year.
posted by julen at 1:50 PM on January 11, 2016 [2 favorites]


I have been quonsed! The USPS did their best to try and stop it but it came through, anyway. I got a delightful book about about yarnbombing in London and a USB drive full of episodes of a delightful British baking show that's been all over my Twitter and I've been meaning to watch!

Thank you so much, litleozy!
posted by MaritaCov at 7:43 AM on January 12, 2016 [2 favorites]


So, being the diligent and dedicated scholar that I am, I made a deal with myself that my holidays wouldn't have to be officially over until both Christmas and Quonmas were done and dusted. As a result, the USPS (or some other national postal service) is now to be held directly responsible for the fact that I will never actually finish my dissertation. I am therefore fully confident that my committee chair will take "watching for the postman" as a valid and acceptable answer for what the fuck I've been doing for the past month.
The future of scholarship is in good hands, y'all.





But seriously though. I don't actually mind waiting and am legitimately happy to get to sport my delightful internal and external Quonsar Anticipatory Glow for a little longer...I just hope my Quonsarer is OK and that nothing untoward has befallen them!
posted by Dorinda at 3:50 PM on January 13, 2016 [1 favorite]


The Quonsmas elves have finally stopped at my door! I came home to find a very heavy box on my doorstep. I opened it to find a series of postcards from Montello, Wisconsin and a boatload of regional treats. There was a vial of peppermint oil, a bag of peppermint candy, and a bag of small rocks which turned out to be chocolate! Last but not least, my Quonsar sent me actual rocks, specifically Montello granite. Oh, and how could I forget the 3 metric tons of biscotti! Thank you Second Chance Quonsar for making my holiday season complete.
posted by amelliferae at 4:49 PM on January 13, 2016 [2 favorites]


I got my presents today. Thanks, kerning! My little catnip junkie loved her new toy. She was too excited to stay still and pose for a picture but hopefully you get the idea. The DC dish towel is also great and will infuse extra quonsmas glee into kitchen chores! We actually were gifted a Boston towel from the same series so you know me as well as my IRL friends! And Princess Leonora nail jewels! I had no idea those were missing from my life ;) Thanks so much for stepping up to be my second chance quonsar! Happy Quonsmas!
posted by carolr at 9:34 PM on January 15, 2016 [3 favorites]


so, I was super-psyched to hear from the Quonsczar-Welves that a double-quonse was arriving from SKorea.

but.

I was even more amazed to hear it was from Wales. (hard-to-asplain-ancestry-thing)

and in my mailbox today...

a lovely handwritten postcard of Castell Conwy, and a genuine-slate of Y Ddraig Goch:

(sorries I could not take better/more-deceiving photos - the postal-minions of some country or other, danged-broke the thing. regardless it will remain forever a permanent treasure!)

exclusive-or-fails-to-fail, thank you tractorfeed!!!
posted by dorian at 9:36 AM on January 16, 2016 [3 favorites]


This month, I tell you. Anyway, picking up where I left off, my anonymous quonsar sent (at international expense) a 'Don't Panic' pencil that was a lovely re-quonse, a bag and guidebook to the London Museum of Water & Steam, a bottle of Kew Steam Ale, and a jar of instant coffee. Finally, in a stiff brown envelope marked 'The Quest', this. [pdf] Thank you.
posted by holgate at 9:16 AM on January 17, 2016 [5 favorites]


So there's what, about a dozen or so folks still waiting for Quonsmas to hit?
posted by easily confused at 2:01 AM on January 18, 2016


I have a second-chance package sitting in my front hall ready to hit the postbox... so don't give up hope for a late Quonsmas, Quonsee.
posted by GuyZero at 12:36 PM on January 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


Wheeeee! I just got quonsed, and it was well worth the wait! I'll briefly interrupt the happy dance to write a quick note:

My magnificent gifts included a bar of super rich (and salty - yum!) dark chocolate, a set of hilarious cat stickers, and the most amazing and cute dish towel featuring San Francisco. Which is really apropos since I completely fell in love with the place when I visited in 2014, and it also holds some personal significance to me. Vickyverky, this was magic! Thank you so much :-)
posted by Skybly at 11:23 AM on January 19, 2016 [3 favorites]


(Also, I feel a bit guilty since a second package maybe be on its way to me, due to the postal service taking its merry time. I will think of a way to pay it forward somehow and am open to suggestions!)
posted by Skybly at 11:36 AM on January 19, 2016


Quonczars- Are we at the point where we can get a 'Quonsmas in Review' numbers update?
posted by PorcineWithMe at 6:28 PM on January 23, 2016 [3 favorites]


Hi!

First of all, I need to apologize: Apparently NONE of the mail I sent from the secret quonsar account made it out from my desktop in the past 10 days. So, here I was thinking that everyone was up to date, and happened to log into the gmail account, and boom! all these messages were marked unread and unresponded to. After verifying I wasn't crazy and identifying the problem (last system upgrade reset/ate many of my mail settings), I'm trying to get back in gear.

It's been a bit of a perfect storm around here (not including the actual storm), which culminated last night in my cat projectile vomitting on me, or I would have realized it sooner.

My goal is to post a stats update on February 1. There are several 2nd Chancer gifts en route right now (2 international), and we may assign 1 or 2 more. And I need to send more up-to-date versions of emails I thought I already sent.
posted by julen at 6:21 AM on January 29, 2016 [2 favorites]


Quonsmas has just arrived for me in the shape of a parcel from California containing some delicious-looking Taiwanese tea, some candied walnuts, dried cherries and an intriguing jar of Trader Joe’s ‘Cookie & Cocoa Swirl’ spread. Fantastic! I have made a start on the walnuts already. Many thanks to GuyZero for his splendid second-chance-Quonsing: it’s very much appreciated!
posted by misteraitch at 2:33 AM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]


You should be warned that the jar of cookie spread was a late addition that I actually bought for myself but my wife warned me that eating it would cause my pancreas to explode the moment I opened the jar. Or maybe she just forbade me,my memory is hazy. So I suggest not eating it all in one go.

It is, iirc, dairy-free so you have that going for you.
posted by GuyZero at 2:52 PM on January 30, 2016 [1 favorite]


Hope your email's unclogged, all quonsnas packages have been received, your driveway is clear, and your cat is feeling better, julen!
posted by easily confused at 6:04 AM on January 31, 2016 [1 favorite]


I just rescued my back-up quonsmas package from the claws of the customs office. I had to open it right then and there under the watchful eyes of the officer, so thank you, tractorfeed, for not sending anything incriminating! I received a bundle of awesome roboty gifts. I just recently discovered my love for Earl Grey, so the adorable little tea servant will have a permanent place on my desk and I will be the envy of all of my coworkers for sure! And I'm already wearing the slap bracelet. A blast from the past - I last remember owning one in elementary school :-) Thank you so much!
posted by Skybly at 2:34 AM on February 9, 2016 [5 favorites]


I am embarrassingly late in thanking my totally awesome Quonser who send me a huge box of goodies from Singapore! I've already drank all the Teh Tarik and look forward to snarfing down all the rest of the Singaporean goodies. I also get a great book of Singapore ghost stories that i'm sharing with the kids and a very cool book of Singapore history. Thank you! I was blown away by your generosity.
posted by nightwood at 3:44 PM on February 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


I never heard from my Quonsee :( I hope I didn't kill him with the edible portion of the presents I sent. Thank God at least they were shop-bought and I didn't send the homemade fudge or else my guilt would be overwhelming...
posted by billiebee at 12:28 PM on February 11, 2016


I feel you, billiebee, I never heard from my first* Quonsee, either. Julen checked, so I know my package arrived. Rest assured there are probably reasons, and it's not you.

*Because I felt disappointed I volunteered to be a second-chancer, and that went a lot better :)
posted by probably not that Karen Blair at 12:35 PM on February 11, 2016 [2 favorites]


Aww, billiebee. That's no fun at all. But I agree, there are most likely Reasons.
Still: no fun. E-hugs!
posted by Too-Ticky at 12:50 PM on February 11, 2016 [1 favorite]


I didn't think of doing that, probably not that Karen Blair. I'll definitely sign up as a second-chancer next year.

not that I'm needy for thanks or anything oh no
posted by billiebee at 1:13 PM on February 11, 2016


Heh. I was That Quonser-er last year myself :) It's okay to be human!

Here, have a hug.

*hug*
posted by St. Hubbins at 2:49 PM on February 12, 2016 [1 favorite]


I'm so tickled to finally say that I have been delightfully and legume-inously second-chance-Quonsed by an anonymous elfish creature. I am very much looking forward to trying out all the recipes from "The Great Vegan Bean Book". Chili and hummous shall no longer be by only foray into the wonderful world of beans! Huzzah!

Thanks so much for being a second-chancer, anonymous Quansarer. I very much appreciated the unexpected surprise.
posted by Dorinda at 1:56 PM on February 17, 2016 [2 favorites]


My Quonsmas had a PART 2!!!!!

Beautiful heirloom beans (for use in aforementioned bean experimentation) all the way from sunny California. Delicious times are imminent in the Dorinda household, I assure you.

Thanks again, shy/secret/nameless Quonsifier. I, and my fiancé who eats the things I cook, are super duper grateful.
posted by Dorinda at 11:47 AM on February 18, 2016 [4 favorites]


I'm so tickled to finally say that I have been delightfully and legume-inously second-chance-Quonsed

Speaking as Dorinda's very, very lucky quonsee this past quonsmas season, I am tickled to see this! Justice Delayed was not Justice Denied!
posted by bearwife at 3:12 PM on February 22, 2016 [1 favorite]


So, I'm guessing that everyone has been quonsed by now. Or at least I hope they have!

Do we have a final tally or summary for the 2015 Quonsmas season?

Who's already counting down to November?
posted by MsVader at 5:53 AM on March 17, 2016 [3 favorites]


I was thinking about our Quonsar Elves just the other day, and hoping their labours were done. If I could get you all in one place, I would happily make you some of my homemade eggnog (better than anything from a carton) whatever the season.

I'm really glad I took part this year; I've been becoming somewhat of a Grinch over the past few years, and being part of Secret Quonsar just really made the season for me.
posted by nubs at 8:39 AM on March 17, 2016 [4 favorites]


« Older Paris Friday the 13th 2015   |   Can We Please Respect Women Expressing Joy? Newer »

You are not logged in, either login or create an account to post comments