Yeah, I got my answer, but fuck you. May 2, 2008 11:37 PM   Subscribe

AskMe vent: Is it just me, or does anyone else get frustrated when they answer questions and the asker never comes back to say "Hey, thanks, that's what I was looking for" or "That's not what I meant, but let me clarify" or never comes back to give feedback to the answers in any way? I'm not talking about "anonymous" askers who obviously can't follow up. I mean regular/mundane/normal questions whose askers never bother to respond at all.

It seems so rude to never come back and acknowledge the answers at all... But maybe it's just me. I don't know.
posted by amyms to MetaFilter-Related at 11:37 PM (141 comments total) 3 users marked this as a favorite

Yes, it can be frustrating. That said, if you can't freely give of your knowledge and expertise without expecting something in return, you're setting yourself up for frustration. This has always been the case and will always be the case.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:40 PM on May 2, 2008 [12 favorites]


if you can't freely give of your knowledge and expertise without expecting something in return, you're setting yourself up for frustration

Words of wisdom indeed, Jessamyn. But, it's not about "expecting something in return," it's just wishing the original asker would come back and give some feedback (whether positive or negative) about whether the answers (mine or anyone else's) helped them.
posted by amyms at 11:45 PM on May 2, 2008


I think it has to do with whether you see AskMe as a resource to be tapped or as part of a community. My understanding is that there are a not insignificant number of people who post to AskMe that don't read the rest of Metafilter; to these people, it's probably like looking up information on google. You don't type "Thanks, google!" into the search box after you're done. It's not a community, it's information.

Other people are part of Metafilter and see it as asking some buddies for help and so are much more likely to say thanks and let others know how it turned out.

Which option of the two I think is a better approach is left as an exercise for the reader.
posted by Justinian at 11:48 PM on May 2, 2008 [3 favorites]


My understanding is that there are a not insignificant number of people who post to AskMe that don't read the rest of Metafilter; to these people, it's probably like looking up information on google. You don't type "Thanks, google!" into the search box after you're done. It's not a community, it's information.

Ahh, thanks Justinian, that makes sense.

I still think the askers who don't respond are rude, but it makes sense.
posted by amyms at 11:53 PM on May 2, 2008


But, it's not about "expecting something in return," it's just wishing the original asker would come back....

That's an expectation, the returning thing. I do sympathize with you, and I do find it annoying when people get a lot of advice and then don't return to the thread, but it does happen. Ascribing a "fuck you" mentality to that behavior doesn't really raise the overall level of joy on MeFi, is what I am saying and I am in favor of more joy.

I think if there weren't more people who DID follow up than people who didn't, it would definitely decrease the community vibe here. That said, you're saying that these are non-anonymous questions, you are more than welcome to MeMail people and nudge them to follow-up
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:57 PM on May 2, 2008


I always am very polite to Google.
posted by aubilenon at 12:03 AM on May 3, 2008 [4 favorites]


If you thank google, it doesn't even blink; just keeps on searching. Amazing.
[
posted by heeeraldo at 12:08 AM on May 3, 2008


Sometimes, I don't do this because I feel like I'm somehow declaring an end to the thread. Maybe someone with a gem of insight decides not to reply because they saw my "thanks" post.
posted by theiconoclast31 at 12:10 AM on May 3, 2008 [13 favorites]


Actually, I think that Google is being a little passive-aggressive there.
posted by Bookhouse at 12:10 AM on May 3, 2008 [2 favorites]


I get mixed messages from metatalk about over-editorialising on the green, and noob-actions (like signing your name using @username, etc). I figured less is more, but if it helps, I am very grateful for everyone who reads, understands my questions, and takes the time to answer it/them thoughfully. I really do appreciate it, but I thought you knew that already.
posted by b33j at 12:10 AM on May 3, 2008 [2 favorites]


Ascribing a "fuck you" mentality to that behavior doesn't really raise the overall level of joy on MeFi, is what I am saying and I am in favor of more joy.

Okay, maybe my "fuck you" assumption was wrong. Maybe they're just so happy and satisfied with their answers that they go skipping off into la-la land without thanking, or following up with, anyone. I'll try to have a more Zen approach to it from now on :)

Happy Happy Joy Joy!
posted by amyms at 12:14 AM on May 3, 2008


I agree with amyms w/o reservation on this. for example (and there are lots more) in this askme he answered a question, definitively, in about 15 minutes...and no thanks or mark as best answer or even a favorite. Again I see this often and I probably err too far by gushing over every answer. But common decency seems to demand some nod of appreciation for the responders time and concern. Not that it should be required, just perhaps encouraged. I do often hesitate to choose a best answer early on, as it's a thread killer, but I sure respond to the one helping me. Of course I am the very paradigm of gentlemanly graciousness.
posted by dawson at 12:27 AM on May 3, 2008


and this is the post i was referencing. My this is a good case of Mondelo...
posted by dawson at 12:29 AM on May 3, 2008


lol That was my own answer, dawson, so thanks for acknowledging it, but I wasn't talking about that post in particular. I was talking about a pattern of askers who don't bother to acknowledge (either positively or negatively) the answers they get at all. I've noticed it a lot lately, and not just in posts where I answered (in fact I've noticed it most often in posts where I wasn't even a participant at all) and I wondered how other answerers felt about it.
posted by amyms at 12:34 AM on May 3, 2008


she, dammit, SHE.
me go now
posted by dawson at 12:37 AM on May 3, 2008


amyms, I do realize you weren't reffering to that question...it's just I had noted it myself not an hour ago, and was appalled, and yes, it's a wide spread 'problem'. Surely folks realize the difference between google and a live human with a cool profile taking time to personally respond to any given query. not a bad tequila either
posted by dawson at 12:43 AM on May 3, 2008


Yes, I've definitely noted what Jess talks about; some people don't really have a sense of what the dynamics of AskMe are at all, and just seem to see it as a service that you can access with the $5 membership - "here's the cash, now answer my questions." These are folks who arrived there from some random linkage about useful stuff on the internet, and have never explored, in many cases, past the Post a Question page. Their loss, really; this is so much more unfun than seeing it as "wow! a whole community of nice people who know stuff and talk to each and are willing to help me!"

and it looks like that one question does have a very nice follow-up now.
posted by taz at 1:08 AM on May 3, 2008



and it looks like that one question does have a very nice follow-up now.

Yes, yes it does, which is heartwarming and ccol.
posted by dawson at 1:22 AM on May 3, 2008


Wait, there's already a thread open for "why doesn't Metafilter recognize me"...
posted by blacklite at 1:54 AM on May 3, 2008


I believe the solution to this is to require as part of an Ask Metafilter post a contractual obligation for posters to check their threads and provide any needed clarification at certain required intervals, perhaps every other day or daily.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 2:44 AM on May 3, 2008


Isn't marking a reply as 'best answer' enough? I mean, the asker saw the replies, thought about them and then marked the ones he or she thought were the best, acknowledging the effort that the people who answered made.

Yes, getting a 'thanks guys' is great, but knowing that the asker found the answer should be enough.

Of course, I'm guilty of this too. There are some questions where I think that I should post again but I end up never doing it. It's not really intentional. I don't wake up in the morning thinking 'Ooh, one more day ignoring people at AskMe.' I just let time pass, maybe hoping for more answers or just thinking about it and suddenly, it's too late. It feels weird to post after some weeks have passed.
posted by Memo at 3:03 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


I considered responding to the answers in my askme thread, but it seemed kind of weird. I didn't want to be one of those posters that "roost" in their thread and try and turn it into a conversation. So...is the general consensus that we should put a capper on the thread by thanking everyone/updating them on the resolution? If so, I'll be happy to do so. I did think it was frowned upon, though.
posted by The Light Fantastic at 3:03 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


Oldtimers/regulars will see updates even if it's weeks afterwards, through their recent activity thingy, so it's kind of nice; I often wonder how some things resolved... but I have also been guilty of not updating, either because I'm just a dirty procrastinator, or because things worked out differently. (For some reason, my neighbor's cats don't hang out on my new cocomat door mats like they did on my old ones, so I never did get into trying peppermint oil, etc. on them, and can't report what works better at keeping cats off mats; never figured out how to dye or paint our couch; still don't know the model description of that zippo lighter). But I do feel bad if I don't at least acknowledge the suggestions or something. I resolve to be better about it, because I do like the spirit of community brainstorming, working out ideas together, and like that. I want it to be just a little bit personal, and not a completely soulless Auotmat-style insert-question-retrieve-answers.
posted by taz at 3:27 AM on May 3, 2008


What Memo said.

Also, what are you hoping to accomplish with this post? Honest question.
posted by 2or3whiskeysodas at 3:29 AM on May 3, 2008


I think amyms is talking about the ones that never get a best-answer resolution? "... askers never bother to respond at all."
posted by taz at 3:41 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


I know what you mean, which is why I make a point of thanking people who take the time to respond to my questions.

Even more frustrating is when the OP returns to post and tell you how great your answer is, without actually marking it best answer. Gimme that fucking tick goddamit.
posted by fire&wings at 4:01 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


I don't care about getting a tick, but there are dozens and dozens of AskMes where I wish I knew what happened.

primarily the James Bond party arrival.
posted by CunningLinguist at 4:26 AM on May 3, 2008 [3 favorites]


amyms,

We understand your frustration.

But do not worry what happened to those OPs or fret about why they did not return.

And if the meat in your burrito tastes a little strange it has nothing to do with Us.
posted by the Cabal at 4:29 AM on May 3, 2008


Sorry, dawson. Although I always try to give feedback and thanks following my questions, I don't think I should be expected to check back every 15 mins in case someone has offered the definitive answer. I think it would be perfectly reasonable for someone to ask a question and forget about it for 24 hours before they come back to review the thread, let alone 3 and a half. Let's be reasonable here.
posted by nthdegx at 5:48 AM on May 3, 2008


I feel your pain, amyms. In general, I spend quite a bit of time composing my AskMe answers - making sure the grammar is clear, finding helpful links if possible, and so forth - and its often something of a letdown to get no response whatsoever. I'm not looking for a big red bow with "Googly is a great answerer!!!!!" written on the front, or even direct recognition of my comment. Its just nice to get some appreciation of the time and effort that I and others put into our answers.

My understanding is that there are a not insignificant number of people who post to AskMe that don't read the rest of Metafilter; to these people, it's probably like looking up information on google.

I think that Justian is exactly right about this. I would also add that the proportion of AskMoochers seems to be on the rise.
posted by googly at 5:48 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


Anyone seen my kitty?
posted by Dizzy at 5:51 AM on May 3, 2008


This has always been the case and will always be the case.

Yes, Jess, but what are we going to do about it?!
posted by dobbs at 6:01 AM on May 3, 2008


dawson: I am the very paradigm of gentlemanly graciousness.

I comport myself well in green, and grey, and all blue spaciousness...

(I'm always so jealous of the mefites who jump in with lyrics/parodies!)
posted by jaruwaan at 6:02 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


It seems so rude to never come back and acknowledge the answers at all...

Askme is not afternoon tea.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:03 AM on May 3, 2008 [2 favorites]


Questions needing a simple declaration of fact ("What time is it?") that you can answer without a significant amount of personal sharing don't seem to need follow-ups. These questions are not like a conversation.

Questions that require you to share something about yourself feel more like a conversation between two people who respect each other. So it feels weird to respond to one of those questions and have the asker (seemingly) ignore you in return.
posted by popechunk at 6:07 AM on May 3, 2008 [2 favorites]


It would be nice if the asker either marked a comment as best answer or posted what solved their problem because that is helpful to others who may have the same, or similar, question.

However, since it is impossible to require this sort of follow-up it is best not to expect it. Hopefully if one has a similar question there are at least enough leads in the comments to help one find their answer.
posted by terrapin at 6:21 AM on May 3, 2008


I had noted it myself not an hour ago, and was appalled

Appalled? Really? As opposed to, say, mildly annoyed? You may need to recalibrate your meter.

and yes, it's a wide spread 'problem'.

It's only a "problem" if you make it one. It's like coming to a big city and getting all bent out of shape because the guy behind the counter doesn't ask how things are and chat about the weather, he just gives you your change. You can either adapt or spend the rest of your life as Old Grumpy Pants.

Yes, it can be annoying to put a lot of thought into an answer (or see others do so) and not get any feedback from the poster. But guess what? It's going to happen, and there's nothing you or anyone else can do about it. We've had this exact conversation before (though I'm too lazy to look up the thread), and I imagine we'll have it again. It's sort of like those conversations about the weather: "Damn, it's hot!" "Yup, hotter'n hell." "Be nice if a breeze would come through." "Yup, sure would." And we spit and look thoughtful and talk about the crops.

Also, what are you hoping to accomplish with this post?

Probably that a bunch of people would chime in with "Yup, that sure is rude." I sure hope that was all, because there's nothing you can do about the weather.

Say, the corn's looking good this year!
posted by languagehat at 6:23 AM on May 3, 2008 [13 favorites]


What bothers me really is when a question obviously need follow-up information, and people who take time out to answer flood the questionner with specific requests for additional information and he or she just seems to be completely MIA.
posted by kbanas at 6:38 AM on May 3, 2008 [3 favorites]


If this is about the cat and tulip question, the poster looks to be very new and only using AskMe. So probably not someone who thinks of such things as "oh, hai, thx, the cat's fine." I'd MeMail them but I doubt the poster is even aware of the feature... plus the user's name is Awkward Philip, so cut him some slack ;)
posted by terrapin at 6:38 AM on May 3, 2008


FWIW, I like to follow up but it sometimes takes me a while.
posted by mds35 at 6:54 AM on May 3, 2008


When you're done feeling self-righteous, you might consider the fact that communities are not groups of identically thinking sheeple. Because of that, people participate in the community in their own style.

Yes, some people are mooches, but you can't do anything about it. Some people, though, are just participating in the community differently than you would, and it would be much better if people were just allowed to be themselves around here instead of having to conform to your ideas of "common decency" (which itself is a terrible crutch-phrase used by people who can't or won't support their opinions with reason) or feel bad about the fact that maybe someone wanted a more prompt or robust response.

In short: you might be a little too emotionally invested in the AskMe questions you answer.
posted by toomuchpete at 6:57 AM on May 3, 2008


I think most of these people are Spanish. They took South America and didn't say thank you either. Cold. Unappreciative. It's in the blood. Just look at Javier Bardem.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 7:10 AM on May 3, 2008


Taking it all a smidge too srsly, perchance?
posted by AwkwardPause at 7:28 AM on May 3, 2008


I agree with Jessamyn that if you contribute answers expecting to gain satisfaction from an OP's response to you, you're setting yourself up for letdown.

That said, I do think AskMe would be a whole lot more useful if OPs came back and said "Hey, that worked great, thanks!" and "Whoa, that's not the kind of advice I was trying to elicit, let me clarify my question" or "I tried that and it didn't work" and so on. It can only add to the overall knowledge/experience base on the site, right?

But, I mean, yeah, you can't make people return to threads. I guess if you get desperate/testy, you can send a polite MeMail asking the OP if they'd be so kind as to check back and update in their thread.
posted by sneakin at 7:45 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


I lost 8 pounds on the Radish and Celery Diet ( 2 smidges seriously, 1 pinch salsify, perchance you mayhap upon it...) and MeFi didn't say a word.
Haters.
You'll be sorry when Digg sends me flowers and stuff.
posted by Dizzy at 7:49 AM on May 3, 2008


I suspect this is connected to the question of whether or not you should send business emails back with a "Thank you!" once a question has been answered. There are people who insist that this bogs down the gears of efficient business and is a waste of time, and there are others who insist on doing it to keep relationships good, even though the follow up thanks doesn't add anything crucial to the actual conversation.

I suspect there is a close (although probably not direct) correlation between opinions on email etiquette and follow up on AskMe. If someone doesn't respond to an AskMe post, I usually imagine them nodding appreciatively at the responses, even if they don't answer, and going on their way.
posted by SpacemanStix at 7:52 AM on May 3, 2008


Also, when I read or respond to AskMe posts, I generally assume that the original question being answered becomes the question of the community (or at least people who are also interested in that particular question as well), and not just the original asker. So the answers become archived for the benefit of the community, and not just for the person who posed the question, upon whom there may or not be a social obligation to follow up with a thanks.
posted by SpacemanStix at 7:58 AM on May 3, 2008


In the context of this thread I realize it'll be a popular (or at least an apposite) thing to say, but thank you for the H2J2 link, amyms! I'm about to leave for work...well, the song is funnee.
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 8:11 AM on May 3, 2008


I don't see this as being a problem, or even that big of a deal. If every thread required a "Thanks!" it would start to get lame and meaningless. If there's a specific AskMe you want to know about, then MeFiMail the asker. If they don't answer, it means that they don't want to tell you any more than they have.
posted by 23skidoo at 8:13 AM on May 3, 2008


What of threads that didn't give a useful answer? Should they be capped off with "Thanks for pouring your heart into inadequate answers, everyone"?

Or should we consider threads that the OP never responds in to be examples of places where we didn't meet the asker's needs, so they wandered off elsewhere?

I mean "fuck you" is only one of the soul crushing, joy sucking attitudes we can ascribe to semi-anonymous strangers who didn't say "thank you". We could be projecting a whole range of nastiness onto them.
posted by tkolar at 8:15 AM on May 3, 2008 [2 favorites]


Huh. I'll admit that I don't usually mark a best answer, unless it's a definitive and final answer to my question, because I feel like that kind of declares the discussion over. Also, I don't want to hurt the feelings of the non-marked people, especially since my questions seem to get a whole lot of good answers. But I can see how it would be considered rude not to respond. If you have ever responded to a question of mine, consider yourself thanked. From here on out, I'll come by and say thanks!
posted by craichead at 8:32 AM on May 3, 2008


I agree it can be frustrating when answerers specifically ask for clarification, and the asker remains silent. Otherwise, it doesn't matter to me. If I see that best answers are marked, then that means the asker has been watching and got what they needed.

I also try to keep in mind that even "bad" answers can serve a purpose. AskMe threads are read by many people besides the asker, so someone else might gain useful information from even a "wrong" answer. And too much clarification and managing by the asker might stifle some answers.

I tend to avoid leaving running commentary in an AskMe, because then I think there can be a danger of adding too much noise to your own thread, or appearing to want to micro-manage it. But, once the answers are given, I'll usually leave a follow-up and mark best answer. Also, I usually MeMail each answerer with a thank you or clarification as the answers are given, to keep the thread cleaner.

But, yeah, everyone likes to be thanked for their efforts. But not everyone is the thanking type. I don't think it's rudeness as much as they just don't think about it in the same way.
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 8:37 AM on May 3, 2008


If someone doesn't respond to an AskMe post, I usually imagine them nodding appreciatively at the responses, even if they don't answer, and going on their way.

This is a simple, sane way to proceed.
posted by cortex (staff) at 8:50 AM on May 3, 2008 [2 favorites]


I suspect this is connected to the question of whether or not you should send business emails back with a "Thank you!" once a question has been answered.

Funny. This reminds me of how we use IM at work. Half the messages are probably "thx" or "k". And a few people insist on using "yw" or "np" in response, and it really is a waste of time.
posted by smackfu at 9:02 AM on May 3, 2008


I've gotten annoyed when I asked the questioner for more information so I could give a helpful answer, and they didn't respond. But I guess I should be more like 'Mandy', who came and gave without taking.
posted by lukemeister at 9:12 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


Well, the comment box on AskMe says "Please limit comments to answers or help in finding an answer." so I don't see how a "Thanks!" really fits in the guidelines (even if comments from the asker are generally left unpruned). I try to follow up if I have some feedback on what worked/didn't work (for future searchers) or to clarify/consolidate the responses/situation.

Now I'm curious as to what my track record is with follow ups.
posted by ODiV at 9:13 AM on May 3, 2008


Also, lukemeister: Thanks for holding me and stopping me from shaking!
posted by ODiV at 9:14 AM on May 3, 2008


I never look back after I give my answer. If it is helpful great. If it sucks, sorry. I view it as sort of the way I read Jerry Garcia viewed taping of the Dead's concerts. Their view was it was a performance and once they played it , it was yours to do as you saw fit. They did use social pressure to say that if you were sharing your tapes do not profit from it, but they felt that they had played the music for those willing to listen and it was now just a record of that and a gift to the crowd.

Consider your answer a performance that is now in the public domain and move on.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 9:18 AM on May 3, 2008


ODiV,

Sure, no problem ... although if you're in Yellowknife, you might want to pick up a coat.
posted by lukemeister at 9:18 AM on May 3, 2008


I've definitely heard from people that they think a "thank you" or something might be a noise-type answer, so maybe we should try to clear that up a little bit information-wise.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:30 AM on May 3, 2008


I always feel like I'm leaving a "noisy" answer if I say thanks to follow up on a question I've asked. Like ODiV says above, a "thanks" doesn't really fit with the comment guidelines. Plus, isn't "thanks" one of the implied functions of the "best answer" flag?
posted by k8lin at 9:35 AM on May 3, 2008


And a few people insist on using "yw" or "np" in response, and it really is a waste of time.

Politeness is a social lubricant that convinces people to help one another. You can't force it, but reminders that a smile and a thank you go a long way are sometimes necessary.
posted by SeizeTheDay at 9:36 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


I agree with amyms w/o reservation on this. for example (and there are lots more) in this askme he answered a question, definitively, in about 15 minutes...and no thanks or mark as best answer or even a favorite.

That was a shitty example and a mean way to put someone on the spot who doesn't deserve to be there. The asker returned not three hours later to say thank you.
posted by LeeJay at 9:36 AM on May 3, 2008


I've felt this too, amyms, but there so many cases where responses by the OP somehow result in them getting the thread wrapped around their necks and then tightening like a python, I now think not responding at all is a reasonable default. The recent AskMe about getting sick after taking a multi-vitamin is a good example.
posted by jamjam at 9:51 AM on May 3, 2008


But I guess I should be more like 'Mandy', who came and gave without taking.

But he sent her away. So watch your back.
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 9:54 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


Whenever I ask a question, I get really anxious about the prospect of selecting one or two as Best Answer, and giving any follow-up. Take, for instance, my most current question: http://ask.metafilter.com/90392/Records-from-a-Pulmonologist . Everyone who answered gave me really good advice. I learned a lot about what to do by seeing how they all responded. But which do I count as Best Answer? Many of them are so similar that I worry someone will be slighted if I select just one but not the others.

And it's not like I'm going to act on any of the advice for at least a few days. Should I post a follow-up now saying thanks, even though, for all I know, all the advice is completely wrong? Should I wait until the thread is completely dead but I've actually done what I needed to do, to say how it all went down? It's not like anyone really cares about the Epic Tale of Ms. Sain'ts CT Scans.

...So, you see, it's all very, very worrisome.
posted by Ms. Saint at 9:57 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


I'm always unsure, if I give a good answer in AskMe and am thanked by the asker, whether I should pop back in the thread to say they're welcome to my answer anytime, and to thank them for thanking me. What holds me back is the foreboding sense that they won't respond in kind. Chain-breakers are the worst, and thank-you note chain-breakers have a special place in hell reserved for their savage, un-etiquetted ass.
posted by carsonb at 10:01 AM on May 3, 2008


Er, no, that shouldn't be compulsory.
posted by Artw at 10:24 AM on May 3, 2008


I will happily post 'Thanks', mark as best answer and even favorite whoever answers my latest question which has sat unanswered for more than one week. There's a prize for everyone! Get started now!

The Poster of this Post hereby reserves the right to mark Best Answers, Favorite and Posting Thanks at his own leisure. The Poster reserves the right to refuse doing the aforementioned at any time without notice for any reason. The Poster would like to reserve the right to amend or change the terms and conditions, including this term, without notice and without incurring any liability in relation to such changes; but MetaFilter has no edit feature.
posted by Memo at 10:29 AM on May 3, 2008


I usually assume that, once it's off the front page, nobody is checking back anyway, because my questions just aren't that interesting.
posted by Karmakaze at 10:33 AM on May 3, 2008


I have counseled many 20-something friends of mine in "real life." I always imagine them when I am answering a question. I also imagine they are busy, enduring much stress if they have to come onto AskMe to post a question, and unlike me, they may not be working out of the house, but have other obligations that prevent them from hawking onto MetaFilter whenever they please.

Also, you are not only giving them an answer, you are helping anyone who reads the post, whether it's today or next year.

I know not all AskMe posters are 20-somethings, but from my experience with my 25-year-old daughter and my younger friends, they have lots of questions. Some may seem inane to you all, but I get daily calls like "how do I defrost chicken broth in a cardboard container that has a metal top, cuz I can't put that in the microwave?" A lot of us would think that's common sense (put the container in a pot of warm water), and she figured that one out on her own (yay); but the urgency of needing to know is just a sense of anxiety, that "what do I do??". That urgency fades with experience, and no, by gawd, you don't get thanked for the answers! You get more questions! But by answering them, you are teaching them how to respond to the next generation as well.

The only thing I can think of is to add a line to the posting box that says "we are collecting data on how effective AskMe is and would appreciate it if you would follow up if your question has been answered successfully" with a link to how they can do that (ease of use, especially for newcomers). That sort of smacks of "would you like to take a poll on the service you received today?" Meh. But maybe a quick link in an auto-email to the poster telling them how to favorite answers and encouraging them to follow-up? "We want to know how you're doing! Let us know."

Other than that, I just like talking to people, so it's lots of fun for me.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 10:42 AM on May 3, 2008


I always assume that if the poster doesn't return, he/she ate the mystery item and died.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 11:11 AM on May 3, 2008 [4 favorites]


I MUST KNOW WHAT YOU NAMED YOUR CAT!
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 11:29 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


Also, what are you hoping to accomplish with this post?

I wasn't trying to "accomplish" anything other than finding out how other people felt about it. I had been noticing a lack of clarification/feedback/response/etc. in various AskMes lately, and I wondered if others noticed it too.

I also noticed that I felt frustrated (whether that's right or wrong, or "self-righteous" or "too invested" or what-have-you) when the lack of clarification/feedback/response.etc. happened in threads that I had participated in, and I wondered if it was just me, or if others felt the same way.

MetaTalk is supposed to be where we can talk about these kinds of MetaFilter-related things. I thought it was better to come here and say something rather than to shit in somebody's AskMe with "Hey, you rude asker, come back here and answer my question to you!" (which isn't allowed anyway, and for good reason).

If someone doesn't respond to an AskMe post, I usually imagine them nodding appreciatively at the responses, even if they don't answer, and going on their way.

I'm going to adopt that way of thinking about it.
posted by amyms at 11:37 AM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


If someone doesn't respond to an AskMe post, I usually imagine them nodding appreciatively at the responses, even if they don't answer, and going on their way.

Just to follow up on this a bit, I imagine that the discussions here are often like in real life. Sometimes when you are discussing something with a group of people, there are non-verbal responses that people give, to show that they understand or appreciate something (like a head nod, or whatever). I think it's best to assume that people do this kind of thing online as well, as not everyone is comfortable always giving a verbal thank you, or an I see, or an I understand, etc. Sometimes real life non-verbals carry over into written dialogue, although everyone else doesn't have the benefit of observing those things, so it is sometimes misinterpreted as silence or ignoring or whatever. I find that assuming these kinds of non-verbals happen benefits the tenor of written discussion, as you eliminate all kinds of second-guessing about what people are thinking.
posted by SpacemanStix at 12:08 PM on May 3, 2008


like a head nod, or whatever

This is why we need Ask Mefi avatars.
posted by lukemeister at 12:11 PM on May 3, 2008


But sometimes responding (or not) might also be about the asker being annoyed. When I ask a question and get 8 people saying "you need a lawyer" that makes it seem like they didn't preview and, frankly, it made me feel pretty stupid. It becomes sort of a "okay, I get that. Barring that, what else do you suggest?" and if one expresses that and responds, then one ALSO feels like an ungrateful turd. Sure, yeah, I shouldn't be annoyed and expect the exact right answer when I ask a question on AskMe, but if that's the case, the answerer shouldn't have an expectation, either, right?
posted by liketitanic at 12:23 PM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


I don't spend time answering questions that I don't have the time to answer. (Well, unless I'm really procrastinating.) Most of the time I don't even go back to find out what happened, unless I'm really interested in the subject matter. I put in my 2 cents, hope someone found it useful, and go read something else. AskMe is not about vindication or gratitude for me. It's a forum, a message board. If I were to email someone personally with a thoughtful answer, and we'd had some previous interaction, I'd think it was rude if they didn't reply. I wouldn't think it was rude if I were a complete stranger to them, offering them advice (even though they'd asked for it).
posted by desjardins at 12:23 PM on May 3, 2008


I'd like to thank you, amyms, for posting this, and I'd like to thank everyone who answered in the thread.
posted by jasper411 at 12:24 PM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


I'd like to thank you, amyms, for posting this, and I'd like to thank everyone who answered in the thread.

Yeah, that's a nice sentiment and all but fuck you.



Sorry couldn't resist. Well, coulda, but didn't.
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 1:00 PM on May 3, 2008 [2 favorites]




Don't forget you can tag your AskMe with "resolved" when it's been, er, resolved.
posted by loiseau at 1:17 PM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


w/o getting bogged down in something that's essentially silly, but because I commented up thread, the following is what OP was speaking to:
When someone asks a question, and maybe one person nails it in the first 10 minutes, or perhaps dozens chime in (like this weeks essay thread). No one wants flowers and thank you notes. Just a simple response. Mark one or more as best answer. If there isn't a best answer, maybe fav a good comment or two. If nothing else, than yeah, a thanks for yr time strikes me as basic human decency. Of course I'm from the South, but I've observed this bit of human kindness in other happy places, such as China and the Caribbean Islands. Ukraine and the NE USA not so much.
It's simply demonstrating the the questioner checked back in and read the replies. Because if he/she doesn't, replying to the next question they have may not be something many are in any rush to do.
posted by dawson at 1:26 PM on May 3, 2008


I am certain that this wasn't the purpose, but this MeTa has overwhelmed me with guilt. I had a question a bit ago and didn't report back on the problem's resolution. I didn't have a resolution, despite the helpful answers I received. Everyone was very kind and I appreciated it deeply.

Sadly, since my house still occasionally has a faint hideous smell I couldn't post (as I would have liked) to say HOORAH MY HOUSE ONLY SMELLS LIKE FEBREEZE AND BOOKS THANKS ASKMETAFILTER!

I went back and said that my house still smells. My mother must be terribly ashamed that I am admitting the stench of my house to the entire internet.

I will remember in future to report back on whether or not the new name for my cat saved my marriage to a pro-declawing, unrefrigerated food eating, unfaithful, unattractive, fedora-wearing man who needed advice about whether or not he can sue his doctor for his strange skin rash he acquired after taking vitamins he bought from craigslist in what we suspect was a scam. I have learned a new etiquette from this post, and I will scrupulously observe it the next time I have an IMPORTANT QUESTION.
posted by winna at 1:53 PM on May 3, 2008


Because if he/she doesn't, replying to the next question they have may not be something many are in any rush to do.

This is not directed towards you personally, dawson, but rather the above sentiment.



Look, either share your knowledge and try to help people because it's a good thing to do or get back on the couch with the rest of the mouthbreathing selfish bastards screaming "memememe". Yes, it would be nice to know how the "story" ended, but the original poster is not obligated to do so and any sort of attitude that even hints that they do should be squashed immediately.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 1:58 PM on May 3, 2008


I am certain that this wasn't the purpose, but this MeTa has overwhelmed me with guilt.

Yeah, me too, so I posted an update a year in the making. I hope there weren't too many of you on pins and needles waiting to hear about my shitty audio interface.
posted by danb at 2:08 PM on May 3, 2008


No problem BB, it's just simply a different outlook, that's all. I'm not gonna claim there's a universal right and wrong, it's just what I'm comfortable with doing and what I expect. Not that I'll be crushed when people don't respond, but I will be disappointed. Hopefully that's not being passive-aggressive, it's just how I see it. And if you (anyone) are ever in my neck of the woods you can drop by for comfort food, iced tea and libations (and I do mean anyone where ever I am). And if you don't thank me, that's OK...it's just that I would thank you. But I don't wanna be jingoistic about kindness. It's not that it's about ME, it's more about you (general term) and yr raising. And I am free to pass judgment on that. But I'll love you (general, I love everybody, even languagehat, tho I don't like him) anyway...
posted by dawson at 2:25 PM on May 3, 2008


This thread is full of... hey burritos!!

*munches happily*
posted by loquacious at 2:25 PM on May 3, 2008


Bah. AskMe isn't just a resource for the asker, it's an archive of answers to problems that we all may face at some time. It's like one of those big data sets that people pull together for creating expert systems or teaching AIs (please, expert system/artificial intelligence researchers, don't get all technical on my ass here), and without the identification of the answer that proved the solution, it's less helpful to everyone. Like using helpful meta tags, it's just the Right Thing To Do.

Of course, if nothing answered the question sufficiently well, then the right move is not to specify a best answer. If something did work out for you, though, then pay it forward by marking-as-best so that the next person with the same problem finds the answer that much more easily.
posted by mumkin at 2:28 PM on May 3, 2008 [3 favorites]


It's not that it's about ME, it's more about you (general term) and yr raising.

My mamma makes good sweat tea.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:43 PM on May 3, 2008


then pay it forward by marking-as-best so that the next person with the same problem finds the answer that much more easily.

YES! AskMe is a resource. Having a best answer in a thread where there IS a best answer makes it more resourcey (yes it's a word...duh). If you ask a question about how to fix your foo and you get 30 answers, the next person who comes along looking to fix their foo isn't going to know which one to pick to fix their foo unless you tick off which answer best helped you fix yours. I could care less about thanks, but ticking off a best/right answer when it's given makes your question and answer more valuable to someone else.
posted by iconomy at 2:51 PM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


sweat tea

ew.
posted by nowonmai at 3:29 PM on May 3, 2008


Who knew it was so hard for people to type "thanks"? Even if no one gets it, none of the answers are right, the songs all suck or whatever, the fact is that people you don't know took some time out of their day to answer your question. Cool people respond by showing a tiny bit of notice.

And no, it's no skin off my nose if they don't, but it's five letters. It's not even so much that gratitude is necessary, as much as no one wants to feel that they're typing into a vacuum.
posted by oneirodynia at 3:44 PM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


Wow. I had no idea I was being so rude.

The way I saw it, the way that I acknowledged people's thoughtful and useful answers to my questions was by trying to answer other people's questions in a similarly thoughtful and useful manner. I've never expected thanks for that, because it seemed like the point of the site. I've clearly missed something very big here, which is unsurprising, because I often don't get this kind of social interaction right. But it's giving me pause. I'm not sure that I should participate in a site where I could behave like such a creep and have no idea that I was doing it.
posted by craichead at 3:54 PM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


Is it just me or does anyone get frustrated when you kill a somebody and their neighbors keep looking for them and you're like, yeah, and now I gotta kill you, and then somebody comes looking for them
posted by klangklangston at 3:59 PM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


Of all the potentially annoying behaviors, askers not coming in to Give A Big Round Of Applause is not high on my list, especially when they mark best answers.

Or maybe the person didn't really get what they were looking for, but didn't feel it necessary to chime in to say, "thanks for your effort, but the hivemind kinda missed the mark."

I do get annoyed when a vital missing piece of information or clarification is needed and the answer never chimes in, leaving well-meaning answerers to have to speculate and interpret in order to try to help.
posted by desuetude at 4:47 PM on May 3, 2008


Don't really care about thank yous, but marking a definitive answer as "best" (a half-remembered book title quickly identified, e.g.) does at least help folks scanning the busy front page know that a question has been answered and they can move on without clicking inside. That's a minor plus, sure, but it is a plus - one that maybe should be noted in the FAQ to encourage folks to do it.
posted by mediareport at 5:16 PM on May 3, 2008


I try to follow up...if I can immediately. Otherwise, what's the use to follow up if no one reads it? Topics usually get bumped off the first page after a few days.

There was a time or two that I did get my answer, but I didn't want to call attention to it because I didn't want to make anyone feel bad. If person A, B, C, D, and E gives me an answer, and I say "Hey, B, I liked your answer the best, thanks!" it may alienate person A, C, D, and E.

I guess now is the appropiate time to do one of my follow ups. I just found out that I'm getting a DSLR as a graduation gift AND we found one waaaay less than $1200! WOO HOO!
posted by sixcolors at 5:23 PM on May 3, 2008


I'm not sure that I should participate in a site where I could behave like such a creep and have no idea that I was doing it.

Don't overreact; not everyone thinks it's "behaving like a creep." But it is maybe useful for us to all to remember periodically that 1) updates are appreciated and 2) marking "best answer" for definitive replies is useful to the community.
posted by mediareport at 5:23 PM on May 3, 2008


Otherwise, what's the use to follow up if no one reads it? Topics usually get bumped off the first page after a few days.

Don't forget people arrive at old AskMe questions via search engines as well as the front page. Follow-ups from weeks or months later can have value to someone clicking through to a question years after it was posted.
posted by mediareport at 5:26 PM on May 3, 2008


marking a definitive answer as "best"....is a plus - one that maybe should be noted in the FAQ to encourage folks to do it.

There's a big, dark note on the sidebar of any question you ask that explains what the huge "marks as best answer" links do. Anyway, nobody reads the FAQ.
posted by carsonb at 5:54 PM on May 3, 2008


Otherwise, what's the use to follow up if no one reads it? Topics usually get bumped off the first page after a few days.

Don't forget people arrive at old AskMe questions via search engines as well as the front page. Follow-ups from weeks or months later can have value to someone clicking through to a question years after it was posted.


Plus, anyone who uses their recent activity button has a good chance of seeing new responses if even a couple of days have gone by.
posted by oneirodynia at 5:59 PM on May 3, 2008


It's not that it's about ME, it's more about you (general term) and yr raising. And I am free to pass judgment on that.

See, but when you're questioning how someone was raised and sharing your judgement, it is about you. You want to quietly tut tut to yourself? That's keeping it to yourself, and fine, you're golden. But making an effort at length to make it clear to everyone that you're disappointed in them and that their parents didn't raise them right is something else.

I had a guy curse red-faced at me once because I failed to thank him for holding a door for me. He was angry at me for not being polite. There is some sort of failure of self-awareness going on when that kind of thing happens.
posted by cortex (staff) at 6:09 PM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


languagehat writes: Say, the corn's looking good this year!

How rude of you to not also mention that the okra is looking every bit as good.

Won't someone think of the okra?
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:54 PM on May 3, 2008


I just checked my profile to see what I had done on my 5 questions. In all five questions I was an active participant in the questions and responses. In 4 of them, I clearly thanked everyone for their answers and effort.

I still think it is totally unnecessary and I never take offense if the original asker does not come back. I give my answer hoping it is useful to someone and move on.

Thank you all for reading this post. No need to respond or quote from it, although I do appreciate those that do.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 6:58 PM on May 3, 2008


Sorry Cortex, my main failing here is an inability to articulate. And using dry humor doesn't work. I really don't think I'm superior. And I really don't give AskMe a second thought if I'm not on the site. I don't get angry, I really don't, if people don't acknowledge any assistance I give. Father I don't give gifts to get gifts, or thank you cards. In fact I wish the 'thank you' thing would never have been suggested. It's not about profusely sucking up to someone who helped you with an answer. It's simply about acknowledging that some person or persons did so, by marking best answer, resolved, a fav, a follow up note...some basic expression that after taking time to write the question you actually read the replies. In my limited experience over 90% do this anyway, it's the few who just give no acknowledgment who appear to have an attitude of entitlement and while I may feel a pang of disillusionment for a passing moment, I fail to see how that is a moral failure on my part or in some way makes me less self-aware and, conversely, selfish.
posted by dawson at 7:08 PM on May 3, 2008


It's never bugged me when people don't come back. I rarely return myself after answering.
posted by serazin at 7:19 PM on May 3, 2008


I sort of consider answering other questions to be my thank you.
posted by Artw at 7:22 PM on May 3, 2008 [1 favorite]


this:
It seems so rude to never come back and acknowledge the answers at all... But maybe it's just me. I don't know.


and so, apparently, it's just me, and maybe 1 or 2 others? Cause I'm not seeing how that is even personal, no one is being asked to A) 'thank' B) 'ME", just to acknowledge, in some way, that the question is or is not answered. But I'm gonna try to shut up about it now. It appears that I care more than I probably actually do. And there are about 6 billion people now living who could care less if my breakfast toast is burnt. So to each their own, and hoist the sails, steady as she goes, mates.
posted by dawson at 7:26 PM on May 3, 2008


it's the few who just give no acknowledgment who appear to have an attitude of entitlement

Your Southern interpretation of these situations may or may not reflect reality.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:53 PM on May 3, 2008


I refrained from responding in my last AskMe thread as the whole point was to see other's interpretation of the situation. By coming back in later and saying "No, that's not what it was, it was really like this!" seemed to defeat the whole purpose, and ultimately, there couldn't really be a "best answer".

Also, i was really lazy and I knew if I tried writing a response it would turn into a 3,000 word comment trying to articulate my confused feelings about race. And then there would be a shitstorm. But also, lazy.
posted by liquorice at 10:43 PM on May 3, 2008


I like to reply after each individual response, profusely thanking the responder for their reply, no matter how tangental or wrong-headed it happens to be, because after all, they've taken the trouble to post -- why shouldn't I take the trouble to thank them?
posted by PeterMcDermott at 11:16 PM on May 3, 2008


I am the very paradigm of gentlemanly graciousness.
When'ere I post an AskMe I am sure to thank my audience,
On whether food is safe to eat, or cattus de-claw-ius,
I am the very paradigm of gentlemanly graciousness.

I am the very paradigm of gentlemanly graciousness,
And when I'm caught out posting spam on matters rather sore-ius,
I'll try to bribe the admins in the hope of cleaning up the mess,
I am the very paradigm of gentlemanly graciousness.

I am the very paradigm of gentlemanly graciousness,
I sometimes post my questions from accounts that are anonymous,
To ask about my intern and a stain she got on her blue dress,
I am the very paradigm of gentlemanly graciousness.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 11:31 PM on May 3, 2008 [2 favorites]


I (and my sockpuppets) tend to thank people once the thread seems to have run its course. I'm a bit more hesitant regarding marking responses as best answer, unless there is a very obvious right answer.
If I respond to someone else's question I don't feel particularly offended if there is no best answer or a thankyou. It does irk me though if the asker gets stroppy because they don't get the answers they wanted.
posted by ponystyle at 12:14 AM on May 4, 2008


Come clean: which of you have been thanking people for their help in anonymous threads you didn't author?
posted by carsonb at 12:41 AM on May 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


In my personal life, I have a strict no-advice policy. That is, I don't offer advice to people unless they specifically ask for it. I adopted this policy after realizing how much I hated it when I'd tell people about my bad day or my bad year and they'd say 'well, here's what you need to do' instead of saying simply 'that's a damn shame' (which is all I wanted to hear), and wondering if I did the same thing to other people.

This policy has caused me no end of internal torment because, like just about everybody else I know, I love giving advice. Love it. Doesn't matter if my own life happens to be a mess; I love to tell people how to run theirs.

So AskMe is a godsend. When someone posts a question that I can actually answer, I get a warm sparkly feeling inside me. I might be helping! I might be useful!

So I'd like to thank all the wonderful people who've given me the opportunity to answer their questions. You people rock.
posted by Ritchie at 2:05 AM on May 4, 2008


I'm actually annoyed by anyone who says "keep 'em coming" or the like in a thread... it always makes me less interested in answering. (This is perhaps totally irrational.)
posted by Jahaza at 7:06 AM on May 4, 2008 [2 favorites]


It bothers me that people don't select the best answer. The questioner has a stake in the outcome of the question and is paying most attention to the often many answers a question gets; I want to know what that person thinks is the best answer, to filter the answers for me.

Maybe you should make it impossible to ask another question until you select a best answer to your current question (even if that means you have to post a comment on your own question to explain why no one told you what you wanted to hear, and then select your own comment as the best answer).
posted by pracowity at 7:17 AM on May 4, 2008


Maybe you should make it impossible to ask another question until you select a best answer to your current question

Ah yes, 'cause forcing people to do things always yields great results.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:22 AM on May 4, 2008


Thanks to all of you who read all the comments thus far.
posted by misha at 8:05 AM on May 4, 2008


I'm actually annoyed by anyone who says "keep 'em coming" or the like in a thread...

It annoys the hell out of me too. Beyond that comment discounting all previous answers, that "keep 'em coming" is usually a red flag for chatfilteriness. If I ever see it again, I swear to God I'm flagging that question as breaking the guidelines.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 8:20 AM on May 4, 2008


I'm torn. I think it's rude to not thank people; on the other hand, I hate gratuitous comments in AskMe threads. If my thanks can also give more information, such as "I tried a couple of the suggestions and they worked, but they alsom created these new problems..." then it's helpful to future readers. But a simple "Thanks" doesn't help answer the question.

I'm aware that I'm being awfully anal about the rules, but that's my nature. Like I said, I'm torn. I like the fact that much politeness (in life) is gratuitous to the subject-at-hand, and I think that many times, the human element in a conversation comes through via little side comments. On the other hand, I love the purity (or potential for purity) in AskMe. Questions. Answers. That's it.

I'm one of the members here you loathes little jokey comments in AskMe. Even ones that aren't mean-spirited. I think the mods leave too many of them in threads. "Thanks" seems similar.
posted by grumblebee at 9:28 AM on May 4, 2008


(even if that means you have to post a comment on your own question to explain why no one told you what you wanted to hear, and then select your own comment as the best answer).

Wow, would this be rude.
posted by desuetude at 10:22 AM on May 4, 2008

The questioner has a stake in the outcome of the question and is paying most attention to the often many answers a question gets; I want to know what that person thinks is the best answer, to filter the answers for me.
I'm not sure how this would work in practice. I'm going to use some questions of mine as examples.

Ok, so in this question I asked what I should get my nephew for his birthday. I got a lot of helpful answers, but probably the most helpful insight was that my brother and sister-in-law would not appreciate more plastic crap, so I marked those posts best answer. I haven't purchased the gift yet. Having read this thread, I will probably come back and report when I do. So it's clear how to respond to this one: mark best answer and report back.

But what about this question? I asked for advice about fillings for turnovers or empanadas. I got 33 responses, and pretty much all of them were awesome. Do I mark them all best answer? How is that helpful in any way? Do I report back as I make each one?

(Actually, I think the thing to do would be to start a turnover blog. I could post each recipe, a picture and a report. But I don't think I have the energy.)

I don't think the turnover question was chatfilter. But it doesn't really lend itself to marking a best answer.
posted by craichead at 10:43 AM on May 4, 2008


I got 33 responses, and pretty much all of them were awesome. Do I mark them all best answer? How is that helpful in any way? Do I report back as I make each one?

Yeah, that's an issue for me as well. I have asked a few questions where almost all of the answers could be considered a best answer. Not knowing the proper way to deal with a situation like that, I usually just leave a comment thanking the posters and letting them know that ALL of them are best answers which is why I am not marking any particular one.

I considered just marking them all as best answer but then I thought, "what if someone comes in with an answer that is not helpful? Then every answer BUT theirs is marked as best and that seems kind of mean.
posted by LeeJay at 11:33 AM on May 4, 2008


I also think the list generation questions are the ones that are most helped by a "thanks for the ideas everyone, I'll get cracking on these turnovers right away" and the best answer thing isn't applicable so much. In my t-shirt question, I got a ton of great answers that I liked and a few that I actually wound up using (and maybe a few stupid unhelpful answers, but very very few) but I felt a little weird preferencing some answers over others by best answering -- I sucked it up and did it because I like it when people select my answer as best so I wanted to spread the love -- because really I was so pleased that anyone bothered to help me with my stupid creative block that I was happy with everyone.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:50 AM on May 4, 2008


This has always been the case and will always be the case.
Thanks, Leoben.

posted by kirkaracha at 12:03 PM on May 4, 2008


Do I mark them all best answer? How is that helpful in any way?

Too much of a good thing is still a good thing! Nobody ever makes all the answers as best, so you doing so would really convey something. Besides everyone loves turnovers.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 4:15 PM on May 4, 2008


Girls, girls, you're all special!
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 5:21 PM on May 4, 2008


One should always say thanks, it's manners.
posted by Divine_Wino at 6:04 PM on May 4, 2008


Hmmm...now I feel guilty. to be honest there are threads where there is no best answer such as, , best seduction music using bagpipes. The answers also may be ALL good so putting "best answer" may be a bit redundant. I was under the impression that posting "thanks" was considered noise.

But I digress and will now review all my questions and mark where appropriate.
posted by jadepearl at 8:00 PM on May 4, 2008


Unicorn: "... ate the mystery item and died."

Eponymusing...
posted by lostburner at 7:22 AM on May 5, 2008


Are you breaking up with me, Fuz?
posted by Dizzy at 8:05 PM on May 5, 2008


Vaudeville would never be the same without the Fuzzy and Dizzy act!

Oops, sorry. Dizzy and Fuzzy.
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 9:18 PM on May 5, 2008


Let's never speak of this again.
posted by Dizzy at 11:42 AM on May 6, 2008


The Thing of Which We Shall Not Speak.
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 11:56 AM on May 6, 2008


in happier news, I answered this question from jadepearl and she sent me a thank you MeMail note, which was above, beyond, and delightful of her.
posted by heeeraldo at 5:09 PM on May 6, 2008


Now, lemme get this straight: one of y'alls is fuzzy, and one of y'alls is dizzy?
posted by flapjax at midnite at 5:20 PM on May 6, 2008


I really shouldn't speak for my "partner" as he's "away" for a "while"---

(get a load of this--- the guy I've been carrying for years finally got busted for those Filipino twins he calls his "gardeners"---)

But I feel it is important to our many, many fans to know---

(was gonna leak this on TMZ, but Matt's a big fan and is always begging us to "come on 'round the compound whenever you want to make fun of the noobs cos they don't know I can see them typing"---)

That even though I'm Dizzy, I am never fuzzy. But oddly enough, Fuzzy is quite often dizzy, even though we've been adjusting his dosages for months---

(thank God he's in a coma...)

Gooooodnight Des Moines!
posted by Dizzy at 6:20 PM on May 6, 2008


Uh. I'm feeling much better now! Really I am!

More of those pills please.
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 7:02 PM on May 6, 2008


God Bless!
Tip your waiters!
posted by Dizzy at 7:31 PM on May 6, 2008


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