Thanks to Jessamyn et al. March 25, 2011 9:46 AM   Subscribe

I love Metafilter and the site continues to get more awesome, especially with the addition of the feature that shows the number of recent new and as yet invisible comments. I love Metafilter even when mods occasionally reject my questions as inappropriate. Thanks to all the admins; you're doing a great job. That is all.
posted by Mr. Justice to MetaFilter-Related at 9:46 AM (106 comments total)

Contact form.
posted by cjorgensen at 9:52 AM on March 25, 2011 [6 favorites]


You have something on your nose.
posted by DU at 9:55 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


Flagged as grovelly grovelly buttkiss.
posted by Decani at 9:57 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


Your sarcasm is oozing all over my fucking rug.
posted by carsonb at 9:57 AM on March 25, 2011


Now is the time for inappropriate questions.
posted by Burhanistan at 9:57 AM on March 25, 2011


Should I save money by declawing my cat at home?
posted by killdevil at 9:59 AM on March 25, 2011 [3 favorites]


Should I save money by declawing my cat at home?

Yes! Use the money you save to put gas in your SUV so you can drive to Wal-Mart, cutting off bicyclists on your way.
posted by marxchivist at 10:00 AM on March 25, 2011 [2 favorites]


Is it time again to break out the pom-poms for another mod love-fest?
posted by crunchland at 10:00 AM on March 25, 2011


Is it time again to break out the pom-poms for another mod love-fest?
posted by crunchland at 6:00 PM on March 25


Let's do it!
posted by Decani at 10:03 AM on March 25, 2011 [3 favorites]


What do you all think about how lazy, entitled and generally stupid young* people are these days?

*by which I mean, anyone under the age of 50
posted by philip-random at 10:07 AM on March 25, 2011 [5 favorites]


I don't like being call lazy, entitled, or generally stupid. Now give me favorites.
posted by Mister Cheese at 10:09 AM on March 25, 2011


Oh god, not another one of these threads...

I keed! I keed!

Wait, no I don't.

posted by slogger at 10:11 AM on March 25, 2011


I'm lazy, entitled, and stupid. Now give me favorites.
posted by phunniemee at 10:12 AM on March 25, 2011


Flagged as not being about me and what a delight I am with all my wonderful little ways.
posted by FAMOUS MONSTER at 10:12 AM on March 25, 2011 [7 favorites]


Schmoopy pile on!
posted by joost de vries at 10:13 AM on March 25, 2011


Now give me favorites.

I've been meaning to ask, where do we turn these in for our prizes?
posted by Stagger Lee at 10:13 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


Sarcastic comment where I end it with "/sarcasm" except that I really mean what I am saying and am trying to hide the fact that I'm being a jackass with "/sarcasm."

/sarcasm.

Small comment that should be disregarded where I say something that sounds a lot nicer than my above comment that was "sarcasm" but really wasn't.
posted by Mister Fabulous at 10:13 AM on March 25, 2011


How could Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? The peppers wouldn't already be pickled when he picked them, now would they? Shouldn't it be, "Peter Piper picked a peck of pickling peppers?" I MEAN - COME ON SHEEPLE!!! PEPPERS DON'T PICKLE THEMSELVES!!!
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 10:13 AM on March 25, 2011 [12 favorites]


Even when mummy and daddy are sometimes cross with us they still love us and they are the bestest mummy and daddy ever!
posted by joost de vries at 10:14 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


Order your Moderator's Day flower arrangements now to beat the rush!
posted by Rock Steady at 10:19 AM on March 25, 2011


Time for pie? Humble Pie?
posted by fixedgear at 10:22 AM on March 25, 2011


I've been meaning to ask, where do we turn these in for our prizes?


The counter over there. The one with the plastic spider rings under glass. I think there's supposed to be a dude who will redeem them for you but he's never there. Dude, where are you? I want my pencil toppers!
posted by Mister Cheese at 10:24 AM on March 25, 2011


I love when moderators give me gold stars and let me tweak the background colors/images on my profile. Just a heads up.
posted by empyrean at 10:26 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


Time for pie? Humble Pie?
posted by fixedgear at 6:22 PM on March 25


Yes.

By which I mean please God, no.
posted by Decani at 10:28 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


200,000 Favorites can be redeemed for 1 frequent flyer mile with PanAm.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:30 AM on March 25, 2011


Schmoopy pile on!

I'm not schmoopy, you're schmoopy!
posted by azarbayejani at 10:30 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


Schmoopy is dead.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:31 AM on March 25, 2011


Whom are you calling schmoopy!?
posted by joost de vries at 10:37 AM on March 25, 2011


a peck of pickled peppers
old world code for stealing pickle jars from grocer shelves.
posted by clavdivs at 10:45 AM on March 25, 2011


I don't have a recipe for pickled peppers, but I do have one that calls for canned Royal Anne cherries.
posted by Cranberry at 10:52 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


It's like pachinko, you have to turn your favorites in for tickets, then go next door and trade the tickets in for... well, you'll find out. (flies away on invisible jetpack*)

* that is to say, the unexamined privilege I enjoy as a dude with a frickin' jetpack

posted by jtron at 10:53 AM on March 25, 2011 [4 favorites]


This site has been going steadily downhill since I got here.
posted by Mister_A at 11:00 AM on March 25, 2011 [6 favorites]


This site has been going steadily downhill since I got here.

The collorary to this is 'nobody goes there anymore, it's too crowded.'
posted by fixedgear at 11:02 AM on March 25, 2011 [2 favorites]


COME ON SHEEPLE!!! PEPPERS DON'T PICKLE THEMSELVES!!!

Google Ron Popeil
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 11:06 AM on March 25, 2011 [15 favorites]


This site has been steadily going downhill because I got here.
posted by joost de vries at 11:09 AM on March 25, 2011


I didn't know Utrecht was that low.
posted by Namlit at 11:22 AM on March 25, 2011


My passive/aggressive detector just went into oscillation mode.
posted by Brocktoon at 11:26 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


I've been meaning to ask, where do we turn these in for our prizes?

So since this site is basically a Chuck E. Cheese's, can we pick which of the creepy dusty constantly-in-need-of-repair animatronic singing animals each of the mods is?
posted by shakespeherian at 11:26 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


I'm not schmoopy, you're schmoopy!

The whole damn system is schmoopy!
posted by dirtdirt at 11:26 AM on March 25, 2011


Grovelly grovelly buttkiss,
why the hell did you write this?
Work on your directive (some scathing invective)
or you'll stay after class.

Grovelly grovelly buttkiss,
please remember our treatise:
"If you have something nice to say
then shove it up your ass."
posted by mintcake! at 11:29 AM on March 25, 2011 [2 favorites]


I'm crying because I don't know what a collorary is.
posted by heyho at 11:30 AM on March 25, 2011 [2 favorites]


oh for fuck's sake.
posted by modernnomad at 11:30 AM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


Does anybody know how to titillate an ocelot?
posted by kingbenny at 11:35 AM on March 25, 2011


Collorary: an uncommon car by Toyota.

I notice with bliss, after a day of digging around in old piano maintenance treatises, that its almost GRAR hour. Take that, butt-jittering Grovels. (Going to buy a bottle of *what* on my way home).
posted by Namlit at 11:36 AM on March 25, 2011


I've been meaning to ask, where do we turn these in for our prizes?

You know, this really should be in the wiki.

First, pick out your prize from the Mefi shopping site. You can have anything on the list!

Next, you'll have to go to any one of Cortex's websites and submit a picture of your cat (or a friend's cat, any cat will do. Do not substitute with dog, hamster, gerbil or goldfish or your points will be invalidated). Include a theme song for your cat, and use the tags, "xfiles", "baseballcards" and "carcassone." This is very important!

PB monitors all incoming and outgoing traffic and, alerted by those tags, will contact you with a special phrase involving the codeword "pony" and an exclusive fax number, which is to be used ONLY for points redemption. Please do not abuse this privilege.

Fax your points and prize request to the number. I'm told the fax machine is located in a secure location in Vermont (there is a lake there, in the middle of which Jessamyn lives), but I haven't been able to verify that. She will then forward them to matthowie.

NO ONE communicates directly with Matt.

Your prize will arrive in 2-3 weeks, via recumbent bike messenger.

Please have pie ready for him.

Note: vacapinta only becomes involved in the process if you are an Aussie. But really, we hardly have any prize requests from them, because the exchange rate is so high.

Hope this clears up the confusion!
posted by misha at 11:41 AM on March 25, 2011 [10 favorites]


NO ONE communicates directly with Matt.

And woe be unto they who try.
posted by shakespeherian at 11:43 AM on March 25, 2011


You're welcome.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 11:47 AM on March 25, 2011 [7 favorites]


corollary even. It's this damn auto-incorrect.
posted by fixedgear at 11:48 AM on March 25, 2011


Q. What's the difference between a brown-noser and and ass-kisser?

A. Depth perception.
posted by Eideteker at 11:57 AM on March 25, 2011 [12 favorites]


Hey I like asses. Just sayin'.
posted by Mister_A at 12:04 PM on March 25, 2011


Is this something I'd have to have a heart to care about?
posted by shakespeherian at 12:07 PM on March 25, 2011 [2 favorites]


> It's this damn auto-incorrect.

You'll notice I didn't FTFY... I tried that the first time I encountered automagically, and learned my lesson the hard way. For the record, I really was wondering if collorary was a word now.

Ever since nucular was deemed an acceptable pronunciation for nuclear, the language has made me ridiculously nervous.

posted by heyho at 12:26 PM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


A corollary is what confused math students say when their professor gets angry: "Don't have a corollary, man!"
posted by amyms at 12:51 PM on March 25, 2011 [4 favorites]


mods occasionally reject my questions as inappropriate.

Whatcha wanna know, kid?
posted by cashman at 12:54 PM on March 25, 2011


When a mod loves an FPP very much...
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 12:56 PM on March 25, 2011 [3 favorites]


kingbenny: "Does anybody know how to titillate an ocelot"

You oscillate its tits a lot.
posted by idiopath at 1:39 PM on March 25, 2011 [31 favorites]


Aventinus Weisen-Eisboc is the tastiest beer I've ever had the pleasure of drinking.

UNPAID ENDORSEMENT
posted by BitterOldPunk at 2:01 PM on March 25, 2011


You oscillate its tits a lot.

Wow, that makes this thread worthwhile. Good work metafilter, good work.
posted by Elmore at 2:24 PM on March 25, 2011


I love Metafilter even when mods occasionally reject my sexual advances as inappropriate.
posted by perhapses at 2:40 PM on March 25, 2011


Who are you again?
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 3:01 PM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


Guys, I just ate a whole iPad!
posted by Burhanistan at 3:03 PM on March 25, 2011


blah blah blah hate you all blah blah blah
posted by eyeballkid at 3:05 PM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


In Burhanistan, one eats chicken feet and iPads. I'm impressed.
posted by Namlit at 3:08 PM on March 25, 2011


You oscillate its tits a lot.

This has made my heart do a little dance.
posted by Jofus at 3:39 PM on March 25, 2011


Did I bring this chicken for us to thaw?
posted by Sys Rq at 4:26 PM on March 25, 2011


My neighbor has left an iPad out with his garbage. Is it safe for me to eat it?
posted by running order squabble fest at 4:44 PM on March 25, 2011 [2 favorites]


Hey! The OP is a government! He deserves some respect.
posted by Splunge at 5:03 PM on March 25, 2011


Eideteker: "Q. What's the difference between a brown-noser and and ass-kisser?

A. Depth perception
"

The wife and I both actually laughed out loud at this. Thanks.
posted by Splunge at 5:15 PM on March 25, 2011


You oscillate its tits a lot.

This has made my heart do a little dance.
posted by Jofus at 11:39 PM on March 2


This has made my heart blacken and die at the realisation that there are people out there who hadn't heard the prehistoric "titillate an ocelot" joke before.

Take my hand, Lord Jesus, I'm coming home.
posted by Decani at 5:18 PM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]



Eideteker: "Q. What's the difference between a brown-noser and and ass-kisser?

A. Depth perception"

Has been donated for use in my wife's 7th grade math class.
posted by tomswift at 5:19 PM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


I almost made this thread a few days ago. Now I'm glad I didn't. Better you than me.
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 6:23 PM on March 25, 2011


CORTEX ATE MY BABBY. MY BABBY.
WONT SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK OF MY BABBY?
posted by special-k at 6:35 PM on March 25, 2011


You mean this sock with a button glued on to it? I have it right here.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 6:49 PM on March 25, 2011


Glued?? Where's craftsmanship gone!
posted by Namlit at 6:56 PM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


How many points for the pen set with the Dino-GRAR on it?
posted by arcticseal at 7:03 PM on March 25, 2011


No, no, I said I hate your baby.
posted by cortex (staff) at 7:17 PM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


I could have sworn you said grate your baby.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:21 PM on March 25, 2011


Is this where I come to post when I'm baked?
posted by cjorgensen at 7:23 PM on March 25, 2011


only if you're willing to share with the rest of the class.
posted by The Whelk at 7:24 PM on March 25, 2011


I hate your baby.
Ladies and gentlemen, sit back, get tight and get itchy, it's GRAR hour.
posted by Cold Lurkey at 7:27 PM on March 25, 2011


The souls of the banned do shake heavily when the clocks strike GRAR
posted by The Whelk at 7:40 PM on March 25, 2011


I'm going to start drinking now so that I can come back in a couple of hours and really make an ass of myself!

Hmm. What should I drink for a good angry drunk? Dark Eyes Vodka? Old Crow? Ah, here we go: Thunderbird.
posted by double block and bleed at 8:05 PM on March 25, 2011


Speak in me, o lost sockpuppets, o banned, o lurkers, o gone and forgotten, never to return.
posted by The Whelk at 8:13 PM on March 25, 2011


Decani: "You oscillate its tits a lot.

This has made my heart do a little dance.
posted by Jofus at 11:39 PM on March 2


This has made my heart blacken and die at the realisation that there are people out there who hadn't heard the prehistoric "titillate an ocelot" joke before.

Take my hand, Lord Jesus, I'm coming home
"

Bye Fred. Elizabeth is waiting for you.
posted by Splunge at 9:54 PM on March 25, 2011 [1 favorite]


Your prize will arrive in 2-3 weeks, via recumbent bike messenger.

Please have pie ready for him.


Um, I'm fresh out of pie. What happens if all I have is a plate of beans and pancakes?
posted by marsha56 at 11:11 PM on March 25, 2011


When I'm drunk, I either love everybody or hate everybody. Tonight, I am not drunk.
posted by h00py at 7:34 AM on March 26, 2011


I bought bacon flavored mayo tonight, and some bacon impregnated cheese, tommorrow I'll get some actual bacon and then later this week i'll put it all on a burger. It'll be great.
posted by jonmc at 5:09 PM on March 26, 2011


How does bacon impregnate cheese?
posted by cjorgensen at 7:38 PM on March 26, 2011


very discreetly.
posted by jonmc at 7:47 PM on March 26, 2011


obscenely?

porcinely?
posted by carsonb at 8:22 PM on March 26, 2011


sharply.
posted by jonmc at 8:53 PM on March 26, 2011


exactly
posted by The Whelk at 8:58 PM on March 26, 2011


tell us about it Janet
posted by The Whelk at 8:59 PM on March 26, 2011


I bought bacon flavored mayo tonight, and some bacon impregnated cheese, tommorrow I'll get some actual bacon and then later this week i'll put it all on a burger. It'll be great.

You should get the Bacon Sundae to top it off.
posted by zombiehoohaa at 10:09 PM on March 26, 2011


Clearly, soaking the MeFi membership cards in LSD is finally paying off.
posted by Hardcore Poser at 10:19 PM on March 26, 2011


too late to the goddamn party again
posted by a humble nudibranch at 12:16 AM on March 27, 2011


TIT a lot. TIT. Singular. Not "tits". Grargoml.
posted by flabdablet at 2:39 AM on March 27, 2011


You oscillate its tits a lot.

This has made my heart do a little dance.
posted by Jofus at 11:39 PM on March 2

This has made my heart blacken and die at the realisation that there are people out there who hadn't heard the prehistoric "titillate an ocelot" joke before.

Take my hand, Lord Jesus, I'm coming home.
posted by Decani at 5:18 PM on March 25


He's always been with you Decani. Those times when you looked back and saw a single set of footsteps in the sand..

..well.. those were the times when he was riding on your shoulders, arms spread wide, blowing his party whistle, and hollerin "I'm the king of the feckin world!"
posted by Ahab at 2:55 AM on March 27, 2011 [3 favorites]


a humble nudibranch: "too late to the goddamn party agai"

Help me carry this cake to my car. Nobody touched it. Look like you belong here!
posted by Splunge at 5:00 AM on March 27, 2011


Ocelots have teats, not tits.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:22 AM on March 27, 2011


He's always been with you Decani. Those times when you looked back and saw a single set of footsteps in the sand..

I Would Put This "Footprints" On My Wall
posted by hippybear at 7:17 PM on March 27, 2011 [2 favorites]


Schmoopy is dead.

Yeah, really funny, Burhanistan. You're killing me.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 9:34 PM on March 27, 2011


Yeah, really funny, Burhanistan. You're killing me.

Please don't do that.
posted by jessamyn (staff) at 9:42 PM on March 27, 2011


Yeah, I had no idea. Please don't do that, indeed.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:02 PM on March 27, 2011


THOUSANDS ARE SAILING
posted by The Whelk at 10:06 PM on March 27, 2011


TO WHERE, WE KNOW NOT
posted by flabdablet at 6:23 PM on March 28, 2011


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